All that we are, and all we'll be is perfect. Well at least until other humans hit us with the truth... we're all a mess, and a mess every second of everyday. That doesn't mean we're a mistake, messes can be totes fun. But we may need to get more in tune to our shortcomings... for the greater good.
Redditor u/Persona_On_Reddit wanted everyone to discuss the facts about themselves they learned through others by asking... What is something you never realized about yourself, until someone pointed it out?
First Impressions.
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I never noticed that I had a resting angry face. I work at a restaurant and i see new people come and go and I've always wanted to get to know them but they never interacted with me. Then one day a server came up to me and said "you know when I first saw you I was afraid of you because you always looked so angry." Ever since then I've been more mindful of my RBF. Myst56
Looking Back.Â
When talking/thinking, I look around sometimes, usually distracted by something moving or just looking while thinking of a word. This part I knew. What I didn't know was when doing this, or looking back to the person I am talking to, one of my eyes does not track the same way. For example, if I'm looking back to the left where the person I am talking to is, my right eye moves from right to left seamlessly and smoothly. However my left eye may do a sudden roll, look up, and then move to the left.
I went to a Neurologist a few years ago for an issue with numbness when I lift my arms above my head (I have an extra set of cervical ribs which put pressure on the carotid and a nerve), and he noticed it the second I introduced myself and asked about it. He said he wanted to take a look at it as well, but we never made it that far. Still kinda wonder what it is. NoleLife
Too Loud.Â
If I'm nervous i laugh really loud. Great, now I'm even more nervous because i can hear it but i can't control it. SuddenTerrible_Haiku
I smile and sometimes even laugh whenever I'm in trouble because I'm so nervous or embarrassed, and it pisses people off. NeverEnoughMuppets
Exit... Stage Left.
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I talk too much. I always give out way more info than needed and and often don't know when I should exit a conversation. Zidane62
Hands Up.Â
That I talk with my hands. The more I'm into the conversation the more I flail my hands around. I got conscious about it that everytime I find myself lifting my hands mid convo I just pause. Sidapa_at_Bulan
Unclench....
EVERY TIME I read those posts that are like "Unclench your jaw & relax your shoulders" I realize that my jaw is clenched and my shoulders are tense.
So unclench your jaw and relax your shoulders, guys. rosesaremaroon
Hold Me!Â
When an acquaintance goes in for a hug, I awkwardly say "Oh we're hugging. Okay." Everytime. Didn't even notice until my husband pointed it out. gypsyroz
Come Correct.Â
After speaking, I sometimes end up repeating what I had previously said but by mouthing it silently? My sister is the only one who has pointed that out so she might just be messing with me. seraphes
I used to do it. I just kinda grew out of it, but I still think about what I had just said and analyze if it was "correct." Anxiety is a b***h. hermeown
Side 2 Side.
When I'm happy with my food, I sway from side to side. Momorara
I "bounce" my hand when I'm loving a meal. Never realized it, I just wave it in small up and downs like I'm making sure sauce won't come flying off when I bring it up to my mouth. mrmmonty
Recession.Â
I thought I had a receding hairline. It turns out I was actually pretty damn bald. Prufrock451
I also had this realization but it was a picture of me from the rear that really showed it. I immediately started shaving my head and have not stopped since. Bald + beard gives me way more confidence than I had before. b0nk3rs1337
Screeching....
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My laugh sounds like a window wiper.
Edit: it's nice to know that people appreciate my hideous laugh :) https://youtu.be/EHQuTO2Rznk my friends sent me this because they said it was pretty similar absenot
Pause. Repeat.
I don't finish my sentences. The last is implied. It's totally weird. My husband and kids pointed this out. I then noticed that my siblings speak the same way. in-my-50s
I sometimes do the same. Like, my mouth or rather my tongue is too lazy to say the rest of the sentence, so I say: The dirt in the corner. Should I leave it or.... And just leave it at that. Sometimes people get frustrated and the I get frustrated, because I have to repeat the entire thing again and add the missing piece. My brothers and I do this. My sister doesn't. yodamselindisdress
On Read....
Someone called me the "queen of leaving people on read," which was a shock bc I didn't have a phone that did read receipts and I thought I annoyed everyone and they hated me and didn't like to hear from me. So, I thought I came off as needy and texting too much/annoying not cold and distant. requiemforpotential
Mean Girl.Â
When I was still in high school, I could be very thoughtless and rude. I'd just say things without any thought of how they might make others feel. One day my brother came home from college and literally tackled me in the hallway outside my room, pinning me to the floor to inform me of this.
I have no memory of what prompted his action (probably something I said to one of my younger siblings), or his exact words, but it had a profound effect on my life. I didn't immediately do everything perfectly, but after a decade or so I finally figured things out.
I still probably say things I shouldn't. Well, definitely. But far less often. morostheSophist
Click. Click. Click.Â
I open my click pens why whacking them against the area between my shoulder and my chest, and close it the same way... I don't know how or when this started but my friend looked at me really weird when I first did it in front of her. Aerakon
He's a Neanderthal.Â
I was told by an ex bf that I have a cave-man shaped forehead. I always knew my eye brows were kinda shaped weird but I could never figure out why. It wasn't until he pointed out the big ridge across my brow bone that I really noticed. It makes my eye brows really enhanced and angry looking. It's so obvious to me now I couldn't believe I never noticed it.
Next Topic.
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That I have a terrible attention span and my mind is thinking of a million things in the background when I'm having a conversation, and I'll end up randomly and abruptly changing said conversation to something completely different. SkiingSkadi
But honestly I wish He never pointed it out because it's not something you can fix and I'm just stuck viewing myself as a caveman now.
It sucks how the bad stuff always stick with you much longer than the good.
Update: I didn't realize how many people would relate! Some of these comments were hilarious and brightened my day thank you. :) teddybearss
Ah... NOPE!Â
How I can get really passionate about something and dedicate 100% of my time to it, and then suddenly just say "nope" and never return to that idea. Like, I can't just keep things going on a slow and easy pace. It has to be everything or nothing at all. And once I'm done, then I'm done. Never looking back. "Pretty annoying" - my best friend :D friedmayonnaisesoda
Hear Me!
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That I tend to interject things a LOT while others are talking. The reality is, it's just me pinpointing all the details I remember about the story, but I didn't realize it was irritating until recently. Now I try to stay as silent as possible, and I haven't seen my friends in a while because of it. undercover_batgirl
Recognize!Â
I didn't know I was experiencing hypomania till a friend confronted me. I have bipolar II, and while I'm always very aware depression when it's happening, it's hard to recognize when I'm on an upswing. Once it was pointed out though I was all, "ya, I guess I have been sleeping 2 hours per night all week, drained my savings on a new hobby, and am making plans to move across the country." I'm getting better at recognizing symptoms now, and meds help a lot. buttercupslutz
That kind of thinking, however, does little to keep us from feeling dejected for days on end.
Curious to hear from heartbroken strangers on the internet, Redditor whitecheeks-24 asked:
What's your sad love story?
Death never comes at the right time.
A Difficult Decision
"The love of my life and soulmate who I was married to for 20 years and together for 24 passed away about 8 months ago. I feel alone and empty inside. I have nobody to love or to love me. My life is an empty waste of space now."
"I took her off of life support because I know that's what she wanted and I had to respect her wishes but I sometimes wish I was a little more greedy. I just want my doll face back."
– StraightSho
Deep Despair
"I am so sorry. I had to do the same thing with my love, married 40 years. It's been 28 months and I'm sinking deeper into despair. We had so many plans, did everything together, and I am honestly lost without him. I send you warmest regards."
– imrealbizzy2
The Shy Admirer
"I was a shy teenager, in love with a cute neighbor. His sister and my mom were friends. He died in a car accident. Nobody knew how I felt about him. I overheard his sister tell my mom that he was in love with me. We never got to share our feelings with each other."
The Illness
"I think a guy I found on match.com died but I have no way of knowing. We had only been dating for 2 or 3 months and we were taking things slow. Then he got sick..tumors in his back and he needed surgery. We still hung out but he was in a lot of pain."
"At the time I was frustrated because I felt he was pushing me away. I just adored him and he was sending mixed messages. Now looking back.. I'm thinking he was just trying to survive. He went in for surgery and I never heard from him again. I didn't know his family and he didn't have social media."
"My mom would check the obituaries in the paper for me and I just always wondered. I hope he didn't know how to end things and just felt this was easier. It's been 5 years and I have a family of my own now but Michael..I hope you're okay."
It's hard for these Redditors to accept the fact their love was never meant to be.
Long Distance Fizzle
"I had to leave my first boyfriend behind because I moved out of state and didn't even get to say goodbye because I didn't know we were moving when I left. We left to see my aunt who had been traveling and was diagnosis with brain cancer in another state, she was too sick to travel home so they rented a house and stayed there essentially until she passed away."
"My mom liked the area better than my hometown tho so we ended up staying, our stuff was shipped to us so I never got to say goodbye to my boyfriend in person."
"We kept in contact for a couple years but being 16 and 18, it wasn't easy for me to just pack up and head back to move in somewhere with him. We both knew we weren't ready for that so we tried our best to keep the long distance romance going."
"Eventually he messaged me one day and told me that he can't do it anymore and he didn't want to hear from me again because he couldn't handle it."
– MotherOfBorzoi
Unrequited Love
"When I was in my early 20s, I've had a love at first sight experience. It completely broke me. He actually was into me too, but not in love like I was."
"I had never had a boyfriend before and I got so excited, I came in like a wrecking ball to cite a great poet. Long story short, I scared him off, he broke up, I couldn't get him out of my head and couldn't imagine a world without him, so I tried to kill myself."
"Though let me reassure you all, it's been years and I'm over him (as long as I don't see him IRL, I just know that I'd fall back in the spiral), I even had a long-term relationship after him."
– marie-llama
Tough Reality Check
"I got left out of a 5 year relationship. I got injured, lost my job, and had to go take care of my dying mom. I was not in a good way. I come back from the ER and she calls our entire relationship off because I was not 'passionate' any longer. Right."
"My entire life fell apart. Lost the house we had gone in on. Lost the dog we had gotten together. And I lost my girl. She was my bestfriend, my first love."
"Huge reality check but at least I'm only 22. I'm glad I saw her true colors when things went bad. Easy to stand by someone when times are good. Saddest part is I would take her back in an instant. I lost a piece of my soul with her."
– schassis408
Some of the biggest heartbreaks come when someone shows their true colors.
Deception
"FOUND OUT MY BOYFRIEND WAS MARRIED WITH KIDS ON THE INTERNET. I was happy and in love for two years. One day while doing my research for a client work, I come across a research paper. The research paper matched what I was looking for, scrolling through it, I realized the owner had some names as my boyfriend."
"But this time he acknowledges his wife and two children for being patient with him as he was busy doing the thesis. I got curious, I took a screenshot and sent him a picture and asked if it's his paper."
"Also, I asked if it's true that he has two kids and a wife and he why didn't tell me. He answered 'DOES IT MATTER '. That was the end of my relationship. Never talked about it, never told any soul what happened."
– MURKOMEN
Heartbreaker
"I finally got with my best friend and soul mate. He knows more about me then anyone and knows what I've been put thru my whole life. When we first got together he promised he would never do anything to me that others have."
"One year later he cheated, lied and and broke my spirit. Something i never thought was possible with me, yet he accomplished it. It's been a year since i left him and he still tries to get back into my life. The sad part is I know he doesn't love me and I can't stop loving him."
– shortgirl1978
Ungrateful
"After four years of supporting my lover through his depression and alcoholism, he announced tonight that he is leaving me. I'm pretty depressed."
– Jackie_Mojica
A Devious Scheme
"Wife moves our small family across the country for a promotion at her company. When we arrive and settle into our house, she leaves me for her boss."
"The move was a scheme for her boss to leave his wife and kids, and for her to leave me, while being able to be close to all their children. So I unknowingly left my career, family and friends behind to move to a state where I don't know anyone so she could be with her new guy."
– ramos1969
Unexpected tragedy will always be, to me, the saddest break up story.
A co-worker of mine used to date a young man who was a patron at the store where we both worked.
Their budding romance was new and exciting and absolutely adorable to watch.
He told me he planned to propose to her before he went away on a family vacation, but sadly, my friend never got the proposal. The guy drowned in a horrible boating accident during his trip.
Although my friend is now happily married with two kids, I wonder if she still thinks about him.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/Want to "know" more?
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I swear if every single person was forced to work in the hospitality industry for at least one month in their life, y'all would be beside yourselves. The amount of craziness and laziness could keep you eating at home for every meal until death.
Play Big
martin scorsese casino GIFGiphy"Casino dealers really do want the players to win. We don't work for the house. We get paid crap hourly rates and rely on tips. Unless the player is super nice they only to tip if they win so we really do want you to win." ~ thedevilsgame
Not the Good Stuff...
"That you can take a gallon of paint and give it a different label, price point, and warranty depending on the store it is sold in." ~ big_d_usernametaken
"My professor told me the same thing. He was a job coach and erased the due dates on food products with I believe acetone or some product in nail polish remover."
"Would slap a new date on it, and the food would get shipped to poorer neighborhoods. That crap blew my mind." ~ Additional_Bar_2013
"Oh crap, I may actually go to jail."
"That if everyone being charged with a crime insisted on it going to trial, no plea bargaining, the system would crash." ~ mikenyle
"When I was a juror, the judge also commented before everything started that trial by jury is the only thing causing people to plea bargain and "getting the system moving."
"Many trials sit in limbo for years, and it's only the threat of "Oh crap, I may actually go to jail."
"That really negotiations start. That's exactly what happened in my case - jurors got selected, and that afternoon (after being 2 years in the system), the defendant pleads out." ~ zealeus
Fake Care
"Safety. It's not really about your health and well being. It's about saving the company money from medical expenses, lost time, lawyer costs, etc. Very rarely does your company actually give 2 craps about you, no matter how much they preach safety, they just don't want to pay if you get hurt/killed." ~ WhenThePiecesFit
"pen to paper"
New Girl I Give Up GIFGiphy"TV/screenwriter here. If you're established and well connected, it's very easy to coast and be a TV writer for YEARS and do very little actual writing. Most of TV writing is just talking in a room with other writers spitballing."
"This is why there's so many old, unfunny dudes still "writing" on TV shows. They're hired by their friends and in TV, a lot writers don't actually do much "pen to paper" writing. Plus everything gets rewritten to death." ~ GardenChic
So much mess. Someone hire me to write for TV. Why are you just giving away jobs to unqualified people? Life is so unfair. This list makes me mad. Let's continue...
Carbon Copies
mail GIF by RabbidsGiphy"I work in the print industry, we print cheques for companies and there is so little security involved in hiring, or keeping the materials secure, or running the actual work, or shipping the work to customers. I'm shocked we haven't had a problem with stolen cheques." ~ Jeff_Cunningham
Followers
"Advertising. I keep reading that advertising is leading people to be more woke, or multicultural. Companies don't lead, they follow. They do lots of research and know where the future markets are."
"I worked for a very conservative global brand. 5 years before gay marriage became legal, they told us it would happen and we needed to start targeting the LBGTQ community." ~ leftside72
"connection"
"Visa agent and I've seen people be refused because the manager didn't like their face." ~ Ok_Albatross9395
"Omg this happened to my sister. She couldn't start her semester in time because she kept being refused a visa even though she fulfilled all conditions."
"Finally my parents found a "connection" in embassy to see what's going on; turns out someone just didn't like her when she came to give her papers the first time. I never knew if I can fully believe that story." ~ animal7239
So much typing...
"I'm a writer, among other things. I used to ghostwrite. You'd be amazed how many popular books are partly or fully ghostwritten. I specialised in taking people's crappy first drafts and rewriting them so they were actually good. Not "good" according to people's taste, which is subjective."
"But objectively better in the sense of being properly spelled, not having gaping plot holes, making sure characters were consistent. By the time I was done there was often very little left of the draft the "writer" had created, but there was a marketable product."
"Pisses me off no end when I see all the bull the publishing industry comes out with about how writers submitting a manuscript must make sure it's perfect because only excellence will get you anywhere."
"I don't know how they can say that and still sleep at night, knowing full well that they're hiring people like me to do large-scale rewrites (or to take a half-baked plot and create a draft from scratch)." ~ iwillckingbiteyou
Thieves
Joseline Hernandez Facepalm GIFGiphy"I work in payroll. The number of payroll reports I see where people are conned out of their overtime is saddening."
"Also, taxes paid by a business shouldn't actively dissuade them from paying employees less. The system shouldn't be based on paying a percentage of employee salary in taxes (FICA, Workers Comp), in other words." ~ ThongofSekhmet
I think some investigations need to be launched. I always knew payroll departments were running a scam. Too many people are being ripped off. Time to expose some people.
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