People Reveal The Times They Just Couldn't Hold In Their Inappropriate Laughter[rebelmouse-image 18355447 is_animated_gif=
I once caught an insane giggle fit during an incredibly emotional eulogy. I wasn't laughing at the death, obviously. There was a service dog near me that let out the most atrocious, silent dog fart I have ever had the misfortune of smelling. Watching everyone dressed in their fancies trying not to do the "who let that one rip" look around was hilarious.
Thankfully my giggles were predominantly misinterpreted as sobbing and I was graciously allowed to excuse myself to the ladies room to regain my composure. Only my bestie knew the truth, evidenced by the text I got while I was in the bathroom: "You're going to hell. Save me a seat." #FriendGoals
One Reddit user asked: When was a time when you had to hold in laughter, and failed?
Clearly, this was the thread for me. Buckle up, babies, it's about to get MAD INAPPROPRIATE in here.
Laugh Therapy[rebelmouse-image 18355449 is_animated_gif=
Was having a rough time with my partner and someone recommended a marriage counselor. At the end of session the lady made us hold hands, look into each other's eyes, and then she started to sing a song, really loudly, in a horrible, cackly voice, "you are special, you are special, you are special to me." Needless to say, we were both struggling not to laugh until a small, high pitched "mmmmmmm" escaped through my husband's lips and we both lost it. The therapist lady was not pleased. Making us laugh was not the intention. She was pissed and stopped singing and just glared at us, which made it worse
This happened over ten years ago. We never went back to therapy ever again with anyone after that happened, but we are happily married and sing the special song to each other all the time, especially if the other person is acting particularly special at the moment.
Funeral Basket[rebelmouse-image 18355450 is_animated_gif=
I was at a funeral for a family friend who I didn't know very well. This was a natural woodland funeral. The deceased was brought into the gathering in a coffin made of wicker. I overheard my young cousins talking to each other. One asked: "Why is she in a basket?"
Shrill Church Lady Voice[rebelmouse-image 18355451 is_animated_gif=
I was in church a few years ago. It was a very serious, stuffy church - most of the congregation was in their 70s/80s. This was also the kind of church that world all you not to come back if you caused any story of trouble. My friends and I were sitting in the back pew. It was time for a hymn ("Hallelujah, Praise Jehovah"). We sang, things were going okay. Then we got to the first refrain.
To this day, we have no clue where this came from. The acoustics in room made it sound like she was everywhere, but this shrill church lady voice rose above all other voices in the sanctuary. "Hallelujah, PRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAISE JEHOOOOOVAH"
Guy friend on the end of the pew started giggling. The girl next to me was struggling, but she held fast. I was fine, but braced myself for the next repeat. Guy friend was too far gone the second time it happened and resorted to burying his face into the girl friend's shoulder. He was laughing so hard, she was shaking. She slowly raised the hymnal in front of her face and started laughing. The pastors kids who were sitting in front of us noticed and started laughing too. At this point, I lost it, doubled over in the hymnal.
So there we were. Three college kids and five children practically rolling in the back two pews. We're getting angry stares from a few of the older people in the church - and we still had two refrains to go.
Finally the song ended. Guy friend had tears running down his face and he looked at us, excused himself, and left the sanctuary for the next ten minutes. When he got back, we couldn't look at each other without setting off the chain again. The poor pastor's kids had to write lines for the rest of the service.
I couldn't go back to that church for a while. When I did finally go back a few years later, guess what hymn they sang?
Haven't been back to that church since.
Choo-Choo[rebelmouse-image 18355452 is_animated_gif=
A guy once tried to order Focaccia by asking for "F*** a Choo-Choo."
I had to give someone else the drivethru headset cuz I could not contain myself.
Almost Died In A Fire? Hilarious![rebelmouse-image 18355453 is_animated_gif=
Coworker had a fire that destroyed her house, killed her pets, and almost killed her because her and her husband had one of those deadbolt locks with a lock on both sides instead of a knob inside and they couldn't find the key to get out. So they both had to jump from second floor windows to escape the fire.
So she's explaining all this horrible stuff to me, and then bursts into tears explaining that now they also couldn't have children, because when her husband fell from the second story when he landed, he "squished his nuts!"
I started laughing as she was crying, couldn't help myself.
I'm a horrible person.
Near Death Experience[rebelmouse-image 18355454 is_animated_gif=
When I was eight I was in church, and during his sermon the priest farted. I know it's not a great story, and it's probably childish. But to an eight-year-old it was the funniest thing that ever happened to anyone in the entire history of the world.
My mother almost smothered me to death to stifle my laughter.
The "Ah" Sound[rebelmouse-image 18355455 is_animated_gif=
Silent reading class in grade 10. The guy next to me sneezed so hard that it caused him to fart. Apparently no one else heard it. I couldn't hold in the laughter. The teacher asked me to leave the class and the second I left that classroom I just bursted out laughing.
What made it funny was that after he farted he made an "ah" Sound. Not in a relieving way, he was more surprised that it happened. It all happened so fast that it took me a second to process what happened. Once i did i could not keep it together.
Nude Model[rebelmouse-image 18355456 is_animated_gif=
I took a figure drawing class in college and the male nude model would fall asleep and fart every time. It was always just me and one other person stifling our laughter. HOW DID NOBODY ELSE LAUGH!??
Workplace Injuries Are Funny?[rebelmouse-image 18347845 is_animated_gif=
Middle of a meeting with very high level management, way above my pay grade to even breathe the same air as these people, but I had "field-level knowledge and experience that could prove invaluable to the discussion".
Anyway, I'm sitting there in my grease stained, muddy coveralls (I was not given notice beforehand to clean up), in a room full of men in suits and I look around.
I acknowledge that I am the only grunt in the room. I also acknowledge that I am younger than everyone else in the room by at least 15 years. And finally, I acknowledge that of the 40 or so people in the room, I am the only female.
And my head immediately went to "This looks like the start of a weird porno" and I burst out laughing... as the VP of the company was in the middle of talking about injury in the workforce.
Chewbacca Ballet[rebelmouse-image 18355457 is_animated_gif=
Went to see Beauty and The Beast as a ballet. Was going good, enjoying the dancers, when out dances the beast.... a tiny, very stocky guy in full leotard and a furry mask that looked like Chewbacca. I think I could have handled that, if it wasn't for the massive endowment he had somehow stuffed in those leotards.
I tried looking at the floor, but this was troubling to my date... so I pointed my face at the stage and closed my eyes. Unfortunately the first thing that pops into my minds eye is the round face of my redneck buddy, laughing uncontrollably. I started making odd little grunting sounds as my abdomen convulsed. I got up and pantomimed that I really had to pee, and fled. I got 4 seats down, and it just came out... full volume maniacal laughter. I stumbled into the aisle, fell to my knees, and had to practically drag myself out of there by the handrail in the hall way.
There was not a second date.
Boss's Boss Laughed, Too[rebelmouse-image 18355458 is_animated_gif=
In a meeting with higher-ups in my organization. An enthusiastic lady goes up to present, she's JAZZED to be telling us of the work she's doing. In the middle she starts using acronyms in our organization: FOCN and SOCN. With her accent, she kept repeating "f***ing and sucking" at least 3 times. I'm giggling so hard a tear dripped from my eye. Finally after the last time, my boss's boss loses it, feigns a coughing fit and leaves the room. Luckily that was a distraction enough to where I could release the laughter. Boss's boss returns about 5 minutes later, red faced, and couldn't look at the lady without giggling.
Big Fat Poop[rebelmouse-image 18355459 is_animated_gif=
Yesterday when my three year old dropped his pants, popped a squat, and pooped right in the middle of a well populated playground. I know I was supposed to be mad about it but he was so proud of himself. "Check out my big fat poop." I lost it.
Feeding Me Mints[rebelmouse-image 18355460 is_animated_gif=
When I was 18 my great grandmother passed away. I didn't know her or that side of my family very well. I sat through the service quietly and respectfully, though. However, the moment after everyone came to pray over the casket, the gentleman leading the funeral said, "And that concludes today's service." Everyone began crying very loudly in complete unison.
I'm not sure why I found it funny, but I did. I kept turning away from everyone to giggle silently to myself. My father pulled me away from the casket and began giving me these mints. I laughed every time I'd finished one and he would hand me another. I finally asked, "Why do you keep feeding me mints?!" He responded, "To keep you from laughing."
This did not help the situation, because I started laughing louder and in turn made him laugh (I obviously got my sense of humor from him). My crying mother started yelling at us, which got us kicked out of the funeral. As soon as my dad and I got into the car, we started laughing uncontrollably. This event has become a big story between my friends and family, and I'm known as that ahole who laughs during funerals. I've not attended one since.
You Smell Like Poo[rebelmouse-image 18355461 is_animated_gif=
I went to church with my brother. He is fairly religious, but he hadn't gone for a long time. We're sitting there and he writes me a note saying something like: "I know that this isn't your thing, but I'm thankful that you came with me. I feel like I needed to get back to coming here."
I proceeded to write him back...
I wrote: "you smell like poo."
I nodded solemnly and passed the note back to him. He read it and gave me a disapproving look... then cracked a smile. I couldn't hold it. I left the building laughing out loud. I had to wait in the car for an hour.
High School Chaos[rebelmouse-image 18355462 is_animated_gif=
My french teacher in high school was kind of a nightmare. One time she moved a kid away from a desk by his friend and to a desk right by her for a trivial reason. He got frustrated (she tended to pick on him a lot) and he yelled"Oh, come ON." And her brilliant come back was:
"Don't 'come on' me!!"
Cat Memes And Sick Babies[rebelmouse-image 18355463 is_animated_gif=
I was like 17 at a prayer meeting at mu church for a baby who had just been born with a heart defect. I remembered a cat meme I'd seen earlier that day and couldn't hold back the laughter.
Diabeetus[rebelmouse-image 18355464 is_animated_gif=
My grandparents were talking about diabetes and pop pop kept saying diabeetus. He doesn't have an accent but when he said diabetes, it's like he's from the deep South. It was a depressing conversation but I couldn't stop from laughing. I felt so horrible especially after he succumbed to it a few years later
Considering Dropping The Class[rebelmouse-image 18355465 is_animated_gif=
My roommate in college had a bad situation with this. He was sitting in class and he was half paying attention. A kid in his class was doing a presentation and during it he said "And my sister is like, retarded".
Half paying attention, my roommate thought he was making a joke about his sister and calling her stupid. He laughed real hard out loud and was the only one to do it. The kid was telling the class about his mentally handicapped sister and I guess he didn't really know how to word it to the class.
The teacher gave a death stare toward my roommate and he shut his mouth.... but he couldn't stop laughing. He was uncontrollably letting out those sort of spit laughs that are forced through closed lips.
The kid stopped his presentation and forcibly asked my roommate to stop laughing. He was so embarrassed when he came back to the room that he was debating dropping the class and he had like a 4.0 3/4 of the way through.
There are some things I just won't say no to. Food, for one. I just love to eat. Bonus points if we're going to go somewhere. Eating can be a very intimate and communal experience.
It's the best, okay? Chinese? Indian? Want a burger? Why don't we hit up a pub somewhere and sit down for a pint and see where our stomachs lead us?
Yeah, my wallet doesn't always like it, but you know what, food is what makes life worth living.
There are plenty of other things out there that people are equally as passionate about. We heard all about them after Redditor fistbump101 asked the online community,
"What is something you can never say NO to?"
"Well, I wouldn't say no to it, but I'd need some pretty darn concrete assurances that it was actually free. People rarely just give away money with no strings attached."
In our time of rampant economic inequality, there are countless people out there who would looove some free money.
"Food. I never say no when offered free food."
To be fair, I think I'd draw the line at a stranger offering me candy...
"Staying in over going out."
You know, even as someone who is pretty much an extrovert... the occasional moment when I've had plans get canceled is a level of joy that I really enjoy experiencing.
"In that order."
"Money, weed, ice cream, sexy times. In that order."
I'm pretty sure Lil Wayne has a song about that.
"Walking in the woods..."
"Walking in the woods when the weather is pristine."
A lovely feeling. Want to feel at peace? Take a nice stroll in the woods. Just make sure to stay on the path.
"My mother's Sunday roast."
"My mothers Sunday roast. And I mean a PROPER. English Sunday roast. With actual gravy, not the American stuff. Roast potatoes, roast leg of lamb, carrots, peas, Yorkshire puddings."
"Especially on a cold, wet, rainy Irish winter day after you’ve just come in from the cold and changed into sweatpants and a warm hoodie. Very particular but amazing."
Oh, you're definitely speaking my language. I love all of that and it's one of my favorite things whenever I'm in Ireland or the UK!
"The best I've done..."
"Buying a pet I want. The best I've done is wait three days but we went back and got the rats."
I hope those rats are doing well!
"Cinnamon rolls and almost anything from Taco Bell that doesn't have beans potatoes or gravy."
You had me until you got into all your Taco Bell stipulations! How dare you, sir or madam! How dare you!
"A big piece..."
"Cutting myself a big piece of chocolate cake."
You had me in the first half, I'm not going to lie.
"A new Xeno game..."
"A new Xeno game from Tetsuya Takahashi and his team."
Ah, I see that you, too, are a person of culture.
Admit it, you have weaknesses too! There is something out there that is your kryptonite!
Have some suggestions of your own to share? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
Nothing is forever. It's a grim reality but no matter how hard we try and ignore it, our inevitable demise looms ahead on the horizon.
And while we individually have our unknown expiration dates, the fate of the human race is an unfathomable mystery that will continue to elude us.
Hopefully, the fateful event is thousands of years beyond our lifetime.
Curious to hear people's predictions, Redditor Nuggl3s7 asked:
"What will be the reason for human extinction?"
Redditors had their sci-fi theories.
Remember Pixar's WALL-E?
"Im gonna have to go with the WALL-E theory that we will turn our planet into a giant waste basket."
We Are Not Alone
"Something from space probably, there is some scary stuff in the void."
An AI Revolution
"We merge with AI end become a different species, thus ending homo sapiens."
It might take one huge impact.
We Would Never See This Coming
"Either a massive space object colliding with Earth, or Mother Nature finally gets tired of our sh*t and concocts a virus 10 times more contagious than COVID and several times more fatal than Ebola."
A Big Bang Theory
"A Coca-Cola truck hits a Mentos truck."
"Every human simultaneously stubs their toe at the same time. R.I.P."
Some speculate the big disaster will be one of our own making.
"Generous of you to assume it will be error. Right now there's a large percentage of the decision makers in the world operating by 'This will have catastrophic effects if everyone does it, but it will be profitable if I do it. So everyone else needs to stop, but I'm not going to, and also I'll be dead by the time the really bad consequences happen so f'k all y'all I guess.'"
"For realz tho…no big catastrophe….just a slow drip of f'k you gimme your money while I ruin the world and whattya gonna do about it brah? Nothing, that’s what. If you can’t stop me I’m gonna do it indefinitely. Big fish eat the little fish. Then eventually no little fish left and big fish go bye bye 👋"
There's A Sad Pattern
"Considering how poorly humanity as a whole dealt with this time's pandemic, and how much we overestimated their intelligence, yeah. 5 centuries is a generous amount of time, I give it 3 centuries."
"This, I think it will be our fault and only our fault."
Growing Lack Of Intelligence
"Gross stupidity. In less than 500 years max."
Many Redditors speculated our own shortcomings would inevitably be the end of us instead of a meteor shower or a hostile takeover of extra-terrestrials.
It says a lot about our lack of humanity, doncha think?
There is little more important than a good night's sleep.
But getting a good night's sleep isn't always easy to come by.
As a result, many people have an important ritual or method which helps them fall asleep easily and wake up feeling rejuvenated.
So much so, that if they attempt to sleep without this method or helping hand, they might find themselves staying awake all night.
Redditor AdministrativeFox784 was curious to hear the things which were necessary for people to have a peaceful night's sleep, leading them to ask:
"What is something you absolutely cannot fall asleep without?"
"Apparently hours of sleep deprivation."- RaphaelSoloTired Stewie Griffin GIF by Family GuyGiphy
Give Your Knees The Support They Need
A pillow between my legs."- frann_ie
A Cool Dark Room
"A fan running and complete darkness."- Dangerous_Effort3355
"My fan on, I'll wake up immediately if it turns off."- keznaa
"Darkness."- MekkoLStar Night GIF by TRTGiphy
"I started wearing them when my wife started snoring like a buzz saw."
"Now I can't sleep without em."
"It's almost become a Pavlovian thing where putting them in almost instantly helps me fall asleep."- fartswhenhappy
When Your Mind Is Racing, It Has To Wear Itself Out Eventually...
"An underlying sense of dread and impending existential crisis."- Bigby11
Soft, But Firm...
"A pillow."- NorthernGamer71pillow GIFGiphy
Keeping You Physically And Emotionally Warm...
"A blanket to hug."
"I curl it up and then hug it."
"I love it Soooooo much!"
"I think this is because I grew out of stuffed animals pretty quick, I was allergic to them, they made cough, and I needed something to replace those fuzzy creatures."- plop8624
Stirring The Imagination To Awaken The Dreams
"Either reading a book or watching a relaxing youtube video."- fh3131
It would be nice if we all had on/off buttons which allow us to sleep undisturbed.
But until we do, our own, personal rituals will have to do.
It's very easy to jump to conclusions about a small sniffle... or noticing what looks like the beginning of a rash.
Most of the time, It's easy enough to rub it off as just a cold, or an allergic reaction which might clear up with some lotion, and thus don't feel the need to alert their doctor about it.
Though others might worry that it could be the beginning of something more serious.
But even with that looming possibility, they still avoid seeing a doctor, perhaps afraid to learn that their fears turned out to be true.
Redditor Kith-Kath was curious to hear from people who refused to get confirmation from a doctor that they may be suffering from a specific illness or ailment, leading them to ask:
"What illness do you think you have but aren't willing to get it checked?"
"Probably depression."- Kho-yi-dwags
Hypothermia? Or Chronic Fever?
"I'm always stupid cold."
"Hands and feet especially."- SimplyJustKarma
"My family has a history of cancer."
"I've lately been having a lot of the same symptoms my dad had when he first got diagnosed."- nottherealneal
"I doubt it's full-on schizophrenia, but sometimes I hear things other people don't, or see distinctive things out of the corner of my eyes that aren't really there."
"Idk, one time I was at work and saw a customer in my peripheral, but when I turned to go take their order no one was there."
"Also, I was recently at a park on an overcast day."
"I was chilling on a bench with some friends, and I noticed the mulch moving weirdly."
"We all looked in the same spot at the same time, after I had mentioned it, they wanted to see, and although I saw it happen, they didn't."
"And it wasn't this subtle little movement."
"It looked like tiny little explosions in the mulch."
"At random spots, it would just go flying, like the smallest land mine just went off."
"It was f*cking impossible to miss."
"I have enough mental illnesses as it is, I don't want to lengthen the list." -Reddit
"I think I’m on the spectrum."- TheCanadianRedHood
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
"I already know for a fact I have OCD/Hoarding issues, but I don't have the money or time to deal with it, and honestly, it's not a huge problem."
"But I sh*t you not, watch the show 'Monk' and just imagine the main character is a Black guy in Detroit and you know me backwards and forwards."- ThatGamingAsshole
"OCD and maybe Dyslexia."- UnstableThought
Irritable Bowel Syndrome
"I think I have IBS but don't want to go to the doctor about it."- No-Understanding8583
"Some kind of bowel disease."
"Been having diarrhea chronically."- Reddit
Deafness Or Hearing Loss
"I think I'm going a bit deaf or have some kind of auditory processing disorder."
"My left ear rings and if I am going to understand someone I have to watch them talk to hear them if that makes sense?"
"I have been a bit worried because it has been getting worse."
"I hate having to ask someone to repeat themselves three times before I understand what they are saying."- sfoxx
As we are, hopefully, coming to the end of a global pandemic, it's understandable to jump to worrisome conclusions regarding our health.
But if you think something seems off, and doesn't seem to go away after a day or two, always check in with your doctor.
As it could be the beginning of something much more serious.