People Reveal The Times They Just Couldn't Hold In Their Inappropriate Laughter[rebelmouse-image 18355447 is_animated_gif=
I once caught an insane giggle fit during an incredibly emotional eulogy. I wasn't laughing at the death, obviously. There was a service dog near me that let out the most atrocious, silent dog fart I have ever had the misfortune of smelling. Watching everyone dressed in their fancies trying not to do the "who let that one rip" look around was hilarious.
Thankfully my giggles were predominantly misinterpreted as sobbing and I was graciously allowed to excuse myself to the ladies room to regain my composure. Only my bestie knew the truth, evidenced by the text I got while I was in the bathroom: "You're going to hell. Save me a seat." #FriendGoals
One Reddit user asked: When was a time when you had to hold in laughter, and failed?
Clearly, this was the thread for me. Buckle up, babies, it's about to get MAD INAPPROPRIATE in here.
Laugh Therapy[rebelmouse-image 18355449 is_animated_gif=
Was having a rough time with my partner and someone recommended a marriage counselor. At the end of session the lady made us hold hands, look into each other's eyes, and then she started to sing a song, really loudly, in a horrible, cackly voice, "you are special, you are special, you are special to me." Needless to say, we were both struggling not to laugh until a small, high pitched "mmmmmmm" escaped through my husband's lips and we both lost it. The therapist lady was not pleased. Making us laugh was not the intention. She was pissed and stopped singing and just glared at us, which made it worse
This happened over ten years ago. We never went back to therapy ever again with anyone after that happened, but we are happily married and sing the special song to each other all the time, especially if the other person is acting particularly special at the moment.
Funeral Basket[rebelmouse-image 18355450 is_animated_gif=
I was at a funeral for a family friend who I didn't know very well. This was a natural woodland funeral. The deceased was brought into the gathering in a coffin made of wicker. I overheard my young cousins talking to each other. One asked: "Why is she in a basket?"
Shrill Church Lady Voice[rebelmouse-image 18355451 is_animated_gif=
I was in church a few years ago. It was a very serious, stuffy church - most of the congregation was in their 70s/80s. This was also the kind of church that world all you not to come back if you caused any story of trouble. My friends and I were sitting in the back pew. It was time for a hymn ("Hallelujah, Praise Jehovah"). We sang, things were going okay. Then we got to the first refrain.
To this day, we have no clue where this came from. The acoustics in room made it sound like she was everywhere, but this shrill church lady voice rose above all other voices in the sanctuary. "Hallelujah, PRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAISE JEHOOOOOVAH"
Guy friend on the end of the pew started giggling. The girl next to me was struggling, but she held fast. I was fine, but braced myself for the next repeat. Guy friend was too far gone the second time it happened and resorted to burying his face into the girl friend's shoulder. He was laughing so hard, she was shaking. She slowly raised the hymnal in front of her face and started laughing. The pastors kids who were sitting in front of us noticed and started laughing too. At this point, I lost it, doubled over in the hymnal.
So there we were. Three college kids and five children practically rolling in the back two pews. We're getting angry stares from a few of the older people in the church - and we still had two refrains to go.
Finally the song ended. Guy friend had tears running down his face and he looked at us, excused himself, and left the sanctuary for the next ten minutes. When he got back, we couldn't look at each other without setting off the chain again. The poor pastor's kids had to write lines for the rest of the service.
I couldn't go back to that church for a while. When I did finally go back a few years later, guess what hymn they sang?
Haven't been back to that church since.
Choo-Choo[rebelmouse-image 18355452 is_animated_gif=
A guy once tried to order Focaccia by asking for "F*** a Choo-Choo."
I had to give someone else the drivethru headset cuz I could not contain myself.
Almost Died In A Fire? Hilarious![rebelmouse-image 18355453 is_animated_gif=
Coworker had a fire that destroyed her house, killed her pets, and almost killed her because her and her husband had one of those deadbolt locks with a lock on both sides instead of a knob inside and they couldn't find the key to get out. So they both had to jump from second floor windows to escape the fire.
So she's explaining all this horrible stuff to me, and then bursts into tears explaining that now they also couldn't have children, because when her husband fell from the second story when he landed, he "squished his nuts!"
I started laughing as she was crying, couldn't help myself.
I'm a horrible person.
Near Death Experience[rebelmouse-image 18355454 is_animated_gif=
When I was eight I was in church, and during his sermon the priest farted. I know it's not a great story, and it's probably childish. But to an eight-year-old it was the funniest thing that ever happened to anyone in the entire history of the world.
My mother almost smothered me to death to stifle my laughter.
The "Ah" Sound[rebelmouse-image 18355455 is_animated_gif=
Silent reading class in grade 10. The guy next to me sneezed so hard that it caused him to fart. Apparently no one else heard it. I couldn't hold in the laughter. The teacher asked me to leave the class and the second I left that classroom I just bursted out laughing.
What made it funny was that after he farted he made an "ah" Sound. Not in a relieving way, he was more surprised that it happened. It all happened so fast that it took me a second to process what happened. Once i did i could not keep it together.
Nude Model[rebelmouse-image 18355456 is_animated_gif=
I took a figure drawing class in college and the male nude model would fall asleep and fart every time. It was always just me and one other person stifling our laughter. HOW DID NOBODY ELSE LAUGH!??
Workplace Injuries Are Funny?[rebelmouse-image 18347845 is_animated_gif=
Middle of a meeting with very high level management, way above my pay grade to even breathe the same air as these people, but I had "field-level knowledge and experience that could prove invaluable to the discussion".
Anyway, I'm sitting there in my grease stained, muddy coveralls (I was not given notice beforehand to clean up), in a room full of men in suits and I look around.
I acknowledge that I am the only grunt in the room. I also acknowledge that I am younger than everyone else in the room by at least 15 years. And finally, I acknowledge that of the 40 or so people in the room, I am the only female.
And my head immediately went to "This looks like the start of a weird porno" and I burst out laughing... as the VP of the company was in the middle of talking about injury in the workforce.
Chewbacca Ballet[rebelmouse-image 18355457 is_animated_gif=
Went to see Beauty and The Beast as a ballet. Was going good, enjoying the dancers, when out dances the beast.... a tiny, very stocky guy in full leotard and a furry mask that looked like Chewbacca. I think I could have handled that, if it wasn't for the massive endowment he had somehow stuffed in those leotards.
I tried looking at the floor, but this was troubling to my date... so I pointed my face at the stage and closed my eyes. Unfortunately the first thing that pops into my minds eye is the round face of my redneck buddy, laughing uncontrollably. I started making odd little grunting sounds as my abdomen convulsed. I got up and pantomimed that I really had to pee, and fled. I got 4 seats down, and it just came out... full volume maniacal laughter. I stumbled into the aisle, fell to my knees, and had to practically drag myself out of there by the handrail in the hall way.
There was not a second date.
Boss's Boss Laughed, Too[rebelmouse-image 18355458 is_animated_gif=
In a meeting with higher-ups in my organization. An enthusiastic lady goes up to present, she's JAZZED to be telling us of the work she's doing. In the middle she starts using acronyms in our organization: FOCN and SOCN. With her accent, she kept repeating "f***ing and sucking" at least 3 times. I'm giggling so hard a tear dripped from my eye. Finally after the last time, my boss's boss loses it, feigns a coughing fit and leaves the room. Luckily that was a distraction enough to where I could release the laughter. Boss's boss returns about 5 minutes later, red faced, and couldn't look at the lady without giggling.
Big Fat Poop[rebelmouse-image 18355459 is_animated_gif=
Yesterday when my three year old dropped his pants, popped a squat, and pooped right in the middle of a well populated playground. I know I was supposed to be mad about it but he was so proud of himself. "Check out my big fat poop." I lost it.
Feeding Me Mints[rebelmouse-image 18355460 is_animated_gif=
When I was 18 my great grandmother passed away. I didn't know her or that side of my family very well. I sat through the service quietly and respectfully, though. However, the moment after everyone came to pray over the casket, the gentleman leading the funeral said, "And that concludes today's service." Everyone began crying very loudly in complete unison.
I'm not sure why I found it funny, but I did. I kept turning away from everyone to giggle silently to myself. My father pulled me away from the casket and began giving me these mints. I laughed every time I'd finished one and he would hand me another. I finally asked, "Why do you keep feeding me mints?!" He responded, "To keep you from laughing."
This did not help the situation, because I started laughing louder and in turn made him laugh (I obviously got my sense of humor from him). My crying mother started yelling at us, which got us kicked out of the funeral. As soon as my dad and I got into the car, we started laughing uncontrollably. This event has become a big story between my friends and family, and I'm known as that ahole who laughs during funerals. I've not attended one since.
You Smell Like Poo[rebelmouse-image 18355461 is_animated_gif=
I went to church with my brother. He is fairly religious, but he hadn't gone for a long time. We're sitting there and he writes me a note saying something like: "I know that this isn't your thing, but I'm thankful that you came with me. I feel like I needed to get back to coming here."
I proceeded to write him back...
I wrote: "you smell like poo."
I nodded solemnly and passed the note back to him. He read it and gave me a disapproving look... then cracked a smile. I couldn't hold it. I left the building laughing out loud. I had to wait in the car for an hour.
High School Chaos[rebelmouse-image 18355462 is_animated_gif=
My french teacher in high school was kind of a nightmare. One time she moved a kid away from a desk by his friend and to a desk right by her for a trivial reason. He got frustrated (she tended to pick on him a lot) and he yelled"Oh, come ON." And her brilliant come back was:
"Don't 'come on' me!!"
Cat Memes And Sick Babies[rebelmouse-image 18355463 is_animated_gif=
I was like 17 at a prayer meeting at mu church for a baby who had just been born with a heart defect. I remembered a cat meme I'd seen earlier that day and couldn't hold back the laughter.
Diabeetus[rebelmouse-image 18355464 is_animated_gif=
My grandparents were talking about diabetes and pop pop kept saying diabeetus. He doesn't have an accent but when he said diabetes, it's like he's from the deep South. It was a depressing conversation but I couldn't stop from laughing. I felt so horrible especially after he succumbed to it a few years later
Considering Dropping The Class[rebelmouse-image 18355465 is_animated_gif=
My roommate in college had a bad situation with this. He was sitting in class and he was half paying attention. A kid in his class was doing a presentation and during it he said "And my sister is like, retarded".
Half paying attention, my roommate thought he was making a joke about his sister and calling her stupid. He laughed real hard out loud and was the only one to do it. The kid was telling the class about his mentally handicapped sister and I guess he didn't really know how to word it to the class.
The teacher gave a death stare toward my roommate and he shut his mouth.... but he couldn't stop laughing. He was uncontrollably letting out those sort of spit laughs that are forced through closed lips.
The kid stopped his presentation and forcibly asked my roommate to stop laughing. He was so embarrassed when he came back to the room that he was debating dropping the class and he had like a 4.0 3/4 of the way through.
All of us have fears which some might call irrational.
Up to and including ghosts, witches, monsters.
But more often than not, reality can be far scarier than the supernatural.
And there are very few people indeed who don't have a memory of a moment when they were truly and genuinely scared.
And not by an otherworldly encounter, but by things that could quite literally happen to anyone.
Redditor GodhimselfUwU was curious to hear the scariest experiences people have lived through, leading them to ask:
"What’s the scariest non-supernatural thing that ever happened to you?"
"I was 14, alone at my grandmas house around midnight."
"She was across the street at the bar she owned."
"I was playing games on her computer, about 15 feet from one of the windows facing the backyard."
"All of a sudden the glass from that window shatters, and I ran to one of the bedrooms."
"I can hear my name being called."
"Eventually I see my grandma's ex-boyfriend enter the living room where the computer is."
"He keeps saying my name."
"I’m scared sh*tless, but I walk out and confront him."
"He says my grandma stole his ID and that’s what he came for, as he’s taking money from my grandmas purse."
"He looks f*cked up on something."
"I forget how he leaves but when he does I call the bar and people come over looking for him."
"They didn’t find him."
"About a year later he did it again, and I was once again alone there."
"Except this time instead of breaking a window he decides to try to kick the side door in."
"I’m just there chilling when out of nowhere I hear the loudest bangs coming from the side of the house and I instantly knew what was happening."
"I immediately called the bar and they sent a bunch of people over before he could make it in."
"He apparently tried to jump from one of her sheds into the alley next to her house and broke his leg."
"He went to prison."- nfreshn
They're coming right for us!
"Two bison charging right toward me down a narrow wooded path in Yellowstone when I was 12."- pcc2Open Range Running GIF by Reconnecting RootsGiphy
Uncomfortable in new surroundings.
"My sister has mental health issues."
"We were in a foreign country, driving across mountains on a one lane dirt road with no guardrails."
"She had a complete mental breakdown and threatened many times to drive off the edge."
"To this day, my mom swears my sister wouldn't have done it."
"All I say is, 'you weren't in the car'."
"'You have no idea'."- BlorengeJulius
Lost in the woods.
"Getting lost on 350 acres of woods in southeast Georgia."
"Was found about 6 hours later."
The dog found me hours before the people did.- No_Regrats_42Scared Woods GIF by Brat TVGiphy
A near death experience.
"Was working as a linemen tasked to replace a 16m wooden power pole which requires climbing up to untie the lines from the isolators."
"I checked if the pole had any rot beforehand, climbed up, untied the lines, climbed down, as I was packing my tools up , the pole fell from its own."- LimaRadek
He wasn't who he claimed to be.
"A man claiming to be a meter reader was in our yard and tried the back door AFTER trying the front."
"It was unlocked because there was a field behind us and our gate had a lock, that he somehow got by."
"The meter reader man was nearly eaten by our Great Dane who was dumb and peaceful, except for when she laid eyes on him."
"Our other dog also wanted to kill him and he was up on our trampoline begging us to call the dogs off, which we, my then 11 year old sister and I, refused to do and went to get our dad, who worked from home."
"The guy escaped while we got our dad and my dad let the police know what happened."
"The real meter reader man came the next week."- ApplesintheorchardDog Bouncing GIF by AFV PetsGiphy
Had no idea what they were witnessing.
"I guess watching a loved one have a seizure when I didn’t understand what it was."
"Legit thought I witnessed a death."
"Scary stuff."- Peppapigisgodly
Always look both ways.
"I got hit by a car while in a crosswalk a few months back."
"Had a split second where I saw him coming and realized what was about to happen."
"I thought I was going to die."- jolalolalulu
Big Sister to the Rescue.
"Saved my sisters life."
"We were boating and my parents just kinda assumed we’d be ok with them only out a couple hundred feet."
"I was about 17 and she was about 7."
"I’m laying there chilling and see her slip and fall into the water and just straight up sink."
"Ran over, dove in and pulled her to shore."
"She spit up a bunch of water and was fine but that experience rocked me to my core."
"Not a super crazy story but almost seeing a sibling die has always stuck with me."
"I’ve broken almost every bone in my body, I died one time and was in a coma for a little bit but for some reason this one stuck with me."- Present-Trip5231
Often, an experience that left us scared does make for a good story down the line.
Though whether it was a good enough story to make having gone through the experience worth it, is debatable.
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Having to work for a living is hard work.
Some jobs come with difficulty and two extra sides of stress.
So the last thing people need is unwarranted hate.
I'm so glad I work from home. Writing alone.
I have issues with me, but that I can deal with.
I do hate internet issues.
But that is warranted.
Redditor PM_ME_URFOOD wanted to talk about the jobs where a ridiculous amount of vitriol is all part of a days work. They asked:
"What profession gets an unjustified amount of hate?"
Waiting tables was always the bane of my existence. Customers are rude. Staff is rude. It never ends.
Filthy HoursFail Just For Laughs GIFGiphy
"Trash men. They’re looked down on as dirty and uneducated, but they do a hard job that is absolutely critical to our public health."
"Youth sports officials. I umpire baseball as a hobby and the way parents act is deplorable."
"The parents on the other hand deserve loads of hate sometimes. I was a coach for soccer and volleyball while I was in the Air Force. You would have loved to be a sports official for our leagues at our base. If a parent got sh**ty they are immediately ejected, no questions, and reported to whoever is their higher authority. It almost never happened."
Behind the Counter
"Any customer (client/patient) facing job. They get the abuse that stems from managements decisions, mistakes and incompetence."
"I did customer service for automotive companies at a call center for years. People get so unhinged, between dealerships, management, people calling into the wrong department, angry customers who were itching for a fight over a rental car. The job paid for five free therapy sessions a year, but honestly, it would take every ounce of restraint not to break some days."
"You aren't allowed to defend yourself or hang up, you can't transfer them to supervisors for a call, you technically work for a third party company that exists to keep the customer from ever actually speaking to the corporation. It was the worst job I've ever had, and that's coming from someone who used to work at a seafood processing plant."
"Food service. The workers have to eat too, you know."
"Working fast food sucked. Not because the job was hard. But because people were *icks. For like, no reason. Working in an actual kitchen also sucked. Not because the work was hard, but because you never did it quick enough and your boss was a *ick for like no reason. But at least you didn't deal with customers."
Too much stress...Jim Carrey Omg GIFGiphy
"Defense attorneys. People hate them because they defend violent criminals. However, as one lawyer put it, their job is not just to defend these people; their job is also to make sure that the cops did their job correctly."
I've always wondered about defense attorneys. How do they reconcile their morals?
They're Smart Toowill birth control GIFGiphy
"I live in Germany and currently in my (hopefully) last semester of university to become a pharmacist (4 years of university, one practical year and three exams of state required). A lot of people here think pharmacists are only cashiers and don’t know we get a scientific education. And God help me if I question a doctor's decision."
"I usually just lurk as a guest, but I made a Reddit account just for this. Cooks for public schools. They are constantly overworked, underpaid, and disrespected. Most schools have only a few ovens and microwaves, so school chefs have to either jam unsafe amounts of frozen food into ovens and microwaves, which is a giant fire hazard, or work non-stop from early morning."
"Plant breeders and plant geneticists. Imagine you're a plant nerd and you spend your life studying genetics so you can figure out how to improve food crops. Like, to make them yield more, taste better, be healthier, survive drought, etc. But on the internet, you're apparently trying to poison the world and control the food supply."
"Veterinarians. My doctors CONSTANTLY get yelled at or called heartless when, for instance, we refer them to a hospital more suited to care for the animal than us. Like bro we didn't just tell you know we are giving you options and trying to ensure you seek the proper care. Don't call me a heartless b**tard for that crap."
No Fun InvolvedAngry Neil Flynn GIFGiphy
"Janitors. Trash-related work. Sewage workers. Plumbing."'
I feel for everyone in these jobs. They deserve better.
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Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
"Giving birth (In the us)"
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
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The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is HardioGIF by VIASWEATGiphy
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
Two Volcanosrachael ray boob sweat GIF by First We Feast: Hot OnesGiphy
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
ExpensiveHappy Music Video GIF by DJ MustardGiphy
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
Attempted MurderBlack Woman Breast Cancer Awareness GIF by Know Your GirlsGiphy
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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