We try not to judge, but every once in awhile, somebody comes along that you just can't get a grasp of. That person likely stirred up/disturbed your day in a way that you didn't expect. But one thing is for sure--you will never forget them.
Here were some of those stories.
Years ago when I worked at a shipping and copying place (similar to Kinko's) a guy would come in every so often with stacks of newspapers. He would cut up parts of different articles and tape the sections together to form his own stories, then run what he made through the copier to make it look like it was one actual article. He would then show them to me and tell me they were about him.
Usually the finished article was a combination of world news about terrorism and the sports section. The overall story was that he is a CIA agent fighting terrorism and his cover was being the quarterback for the Chicago Bears.
I used to work the drive through at a Del Taco that was open 24 hours a day. I had several odd experiences with a regular who came in about once a week towards the end of my employment there.
Experience 1: Man comes to window and asks if our bean and cheese burrito is organic. I say "probably not but I'm not sure." He decides that this means they absolutely must be 100% organic and orders 3 of them.
Experience 2: Same man comes to window shirtless. He explains that he is only shirtless because he was sweating profusely moments earlier (at 2am) and proceeds to hold a soaking wet shirt up to the window for me to touch as proof.
Experience 3. Same man comes to window, does not order anything, but tells me he is very happy that we are open 24 hours a day because "he is only awake at night."
Experience 4. Same man comes to window to tell me about a yoga studio he has been frequenting because they are open until 3am. He suggests I check it out. He does not order his usual "organic" bean and cheese burrito but rather our fish tacos because "he has decided to only eat fish."
Very nice man. Very strange man.
I went to a wilderness survival school and there was this guy there named Charlie who never wore a shirt, rode this really beat-up motorcycle everywhere, and mined Bitcoin for a living. He didn't bring a tent so he slept on a tarp on the ground for the whole week and ate canned beans even though we provided meals. He cried a lot and hugged everyone at the end of the week.
Charlie was pretty cool tbh.
When I lived in Hawaii I used to meet a lot of weirdos. It's hard to pick a winner out of all of them but I'll go with the crazy Welsh guy for this entry.
I was sitting at a bus stop reading when he approached me.
"LIKE TO READ, EH?"
The caps lock is appropriate here because he always spoke like he's just barely refraining from going completely ballistic.
"Uh yeah," I said.
"I HAVE A BOOK OF POEMS I'VE WRITTEN. WOULD YOU LIKE TO READ THEM?"
"I guess so," I said.
He then thrust a manila folder at me, then added "THEY'RE WRITTEN BACKWARDS BECAUSE THEY'RE ABOUT WHO THE JEWS STOLE TIME."
"Uh thanks," I said.
"I HOPE YOU LIKE THEM," he said, then walked away.
According to the writing on the packet he was the co-president of the Hawaiian-Welsh Astral Society, which met weekly at a nearby park. The poems began with photocopies of a bunch of news articles he had annotated with comments I couldn't make any sense of before getting into the poetry itself, which made no reference to Jews anywhere that I could see but were dated in reverse chronology, which I guess is what he meant by them being written backwards. They were not very good poems.
Georgie Porgie Scared MeGiphy
The first day I met him, he was rubbing his tummy. Under the shirt. It was weird, but not scary. I didn't think he was trying to be weird, just that he wanted to rub his tummy and this was the time to do it, mere coincidence that we were speaking.
One time he was shouting in his office, "SHUT UP SLAVE, SHUT UP SLAVE" over and over. We couldn't tell what he was saying at first, but he left quickly towards the elevators and still shouting in the lobby.
He would try to touch your elbow with his instead of a high five or anything.
He'd have random outbursts, similar to the "shut up slave", but more contained. Like, he'd know his reaction was uncalled for, however he wasn't able to control what he was saying.
As I got to know him more, I could tell that he was working on it and trying to get himself under control, however I don't know if he's ever been diagnosed with anything.
I called him John the liar...he was a coworker of mine in college at a sporting goods store. He lied about everything not just embellishing stories or adding a few extra details... just straight up lies. He would lie about what he ate for lunch even though I saw him eat it.
He told our manager that his dad was a 6'5 marine who helped take down Osama Bin Laden and then an hour later he told me his dad was a quadriplegic and had been for 30 years. Then he told me he got an override from the administration to take 24 credits one semester as a biology major...then I found out he was still in high school.
It was absolutely psychotic, I finally had to confront him about it when he started telling customers the completely wrong specs on all the guns we carried. He just lied some more and said that I was wrong or that I misunderstood him.
Eventually I had to ask my supervisor to schedule me on a different shift because I couldn't take it anymore.
Assault By Bookshelf
I managed a bookstore for a long time and you run into your share of weirdos, there. I could tell a million stories. One of the weirdest was this lady who came in a few times who would get dozens of books, browse through them, ask us to hold them, and then never ask to see them again or buy them, so we began just reshelving stuff immediately.
One day she came in and took over this one sitting area. She had probably close to a hundred books piled on the coffee table and the floor, and the other customers sitting there were clearly starting to get annoyed. I went over with a library cart and offered to take some of the books to the front of the store to hold onto them while she "shopped". She said no. I said at the very least I needed to put the books on the cart because it was hazardous to have piles of books in the aisle, but when I knelt to pick them up, she grabbed my hands and slammed them on the table, pinning my wrists down, and legit snarled at me. I managed to stay calm and told her to get her hands off of me, and told one of my co-managers who was nearby to call the police.
When the police came, they asked me if I wanted to press charges for assault, but I said no: I just wanted her trespassed from the property. He wrote out a trespass order and she pulled a folder out where she had a stack of trespass orders from various local businesses and filed it alphabetically - I guess she got banned from so many places, she found it hard to keep track.
The police ended up having to stay for a while because she kept circling her car through the parking lot and screaming obscenities at me. I don't remember everything she said, but I do know at one point she said "F*CK YOU. YOU'RE NOT THE REAL PRINCESS DIANA. I KNEW THE REAL PRINCESS DIANA AND YOU AREN'T HER, MOTHERF*CKER!" It took us over an hour to reshelve all her goddamn books.
I looked up her name online later when I got home. Turned out she was a prominent real estate agent the next city over. I cannot imagine showing up to an open house held by that lunatic.
The Lunch List
The cemetery groundskeeper in our hometown.
He did a very good job (the grounds were immaculate and perfectly landscaped), but he'd hover over people when they'd visited a grave - as if he didn't want anyone in his cemetery.
People wondered why he'd have his lunch inside the mausoleum on the grounds on sunny days instead of being outdoors. He'd say, "I prefer being with the dead than with the living."
I Hate You, Dan
I'll call him Dan. Dan was my roommate in a military school. Military school is already full of weirdos but Dan... Dan owns it. Here's a slight list of the atrocities I had with my man, Dan;
Dan kept a dead bird he found outside in his desk. He wanted to get its bones and sell it to a museum.
Dan was filling up a half gallon bottle with dip spit. He plan was to one day use the collected amount and "repackage" it into empty dip cans to sell to people. I almost threw up twice remembering this. One day, he didn't tighten the lid and it spilled into his footlocker. Three times almost threw up.
In six months of knowing Dan, I saw him shower three times. He was quite stinky fellow. I was his roommate.
He thought he was a vampire. I asked him why. He said he didn't like sunlight. I explained that he never went into the sun so that's why it bothered him. He said his mom had to file his fangs when he was born. I explained to him newborns do not have teeth usually. He told me he drank blood and liked it. I asked if it was his. He said no. I asked who the f*ck gave him blood. He said he was sworn to secrecy. I said the name of another weirdo at the school because I just f*cking knew it. He was basically like "lol, that's him."
We had these giant bed cover things we called bed condoms. It was a large cloth like bag that you put over a twin mattress in our barracks bunk beds. Nobody used them because it made it harder to make your bed for inspections. Reason I bring this up? Dan never did his laundry. We had pickup service. Literally you just leave a bag of clothes out your door someone picks it up and folds it. Dan never did his laundry. Dan's laundry was too much for his laundry bag. Dan starting using his bed condom. Dan filled his bed condom. One day, I threaten to beat his ass if he didn't get his laundry done. I woke up him up in the morning prior to the pickup and went to go shower. As I was leaving, I witnessed him pouring his dirty ass laundry onto his bed. I went to shower. When I came back, Dan was cocooned in a massive pile of dirty laundry on his bed that he was sleeping naked in. He did not emerge from his sacred slumber as a beautiful butterfly. He was still Dan.
Dan would masturbate at my computer at night when he thought I was asleep to weird anime flash games. I only caught him once and changed my PW. Who knows how many times he stroked that vienna sausage till his eyes rolled back.
One time, my buddy and I went out. We came back to watch a movie and Dan had like three beers or whatever so was laying in his bed. There was a beer bottle on my desk in which my buddy asked if it was mine and I said no. He said it was almost empty so he was going to spit in it as he put a dip in. After about 15 minutes, he said he didn't want to spit in it anymore because it was warm. I said something about it was on top of my computer hard drive so maybe the computer warmed it up. Buddy left for a minute. Dan proceeds to tell me that the bottle is warm because he peed in it. He left it it on my desk. I beat up Dan.
Dan left boogers under my desk.
Dan was morbidly obese and disgusting. Somehow Dan's mom was fine. Shockingly attractive.
Dan bought a Russian trench coat and a gas mask.He would sometimes sleep in them.
Dan snored loudly.
People were not fond of Dan. One night he was sprayed with the fire extinguisher while watching stuff on his computer... and hallucinating on Robitussin. He fell down and busted his head.
Dan got written up because the sow that he drank blood from and Dan were caught repeatedly playing around the dumpster by the cadet chain of command. We do not know why they liked the dumpster.
One time I walked into the room and there was a strange gold tint to it. I had been gone all weekend and was confused. I walked into my room and was like basically what the f*ck. I looked over and I see Dan and blood donation idiot smiling at me with gold paint on their mouths. I noticed the spray paint can on the desk. I left the room.
Ever heard of pouring Listerine through slice of bread will filter the alcohol out so you can drink it? Dan heard this rumor too. Dan got sick that day after growing frustrated and eating the slice of bread.
Ever heard that if you leave oranges out, the mold can make you hallucinate? Me neither. Dan did! He grew frustrated and ate the orange. Dan was sick again.
I am forgetting things about Dan. I know it. I may add if I remember some other ones.
I was not fond of Dan.
If you enjoy this, read about Buck.
I am not fond of him too.
Edit Specialist Buck It's full blown military jargon but pretty sure they came from the same breeding.
Trapped In A ConvoGiphy
An old lady that used to live in my town who was usually just known as the "I say!" lady. She was usually seen accompanied by a large dog. She was called that because she started all conversations with adults with "I say....".
She was an absolute terror to children. If a child came within a few feet she would berate them for being near and say the dog would attack them (the dog seemed more terrified of her and I never heard of it attacking anyone). We kids all knew to just leave her alone.
With adults, she was a totally different person and would be extremely friendly. Adults knew to avoid her too because she would talk to them for hours if you let them and literally chase after you if you tried to leave.
All of us have fears which some might call irrational.
Up to and including ghosts, witches, monsters.
But more often than not, reality can be far scarier than the supernatural.
And there are very few people indeed who don't have a memory of a moment when they were truly and genuinely scared.
And not by an otherworldly encounter, but by things that could quite literally happen to anyone.
Redditor GodhimselfUwU was curious to hear the scariest experiences people have lived through, leading them to ask:
"What’s the scariest non-supernatural thing that ever happened to you?"
"I was 14, alone at my grandmas house around midnight."
"She was across the street at the bar she owned."
"I was playing games on her computer, about 15 feet from one of the windows facing the backyard."
"All of a sudden the glass from that window shatters, and I ran to one of the bedrooms."
"I can hear my name being called."
"Eventually I see my grandma's ex-boyfriend enter the living room where the computer is."
"He keeps saying my name."
"I’m scared sh*tless, but I walk out and confront him."
"He says my grandma stole his ID and that’s what he came for, as he’s taking money from my grandmas purse."
"He looks f*cked up on something."
"I forget how he leaves but when he does I call the bar and people come over looking for him."
"They didn’t find him."
"About a year later he did it again, and I was once again alone there."
"Except this time instead of breaking a window he decides to try to kick the side door in."
"I’m just there chilling when out of nowhere I hear the loudest bangs coming from the side of the house and I instantly knew what was happening."
"I immediately called the bar and they sent a bunch of people over before he could make it in."
"He apparently tried to jump from one of her sheds into the alley next to her house and broke his leg."
"He went to prison."- nfreshn
They're coming right for us!
"Two bison charging right toward me down a narrow wooded path in Yellowstone when I was 12."- pcc2Open Range Running GIF by Reconnecting RootsGiphy
Uncomfortable in new surroundings.
"My sister has mental health issues."
"We were in a foreign country, driving across mountains on a one lane dirt road with no guardrails."
"She had a complete mental breakdown and threatened many times to drive off the edge."
"To this day, my mom swears my sister wouldn't have done it."
"All I say is, 'you weren't in the car'."
"'You have no idea'."- BlorengeJulius
Lost in the woods.
"Getting lost on 350 acres of woods in southeast Georgia."
"Was found about 6 hours later."
The dog found me hours before the people did.- No_Regrats_42Scared Woods GIF by Brat TVGiphy
A near death experience.
"Was working as a linemen tasked to replace a 16m wooden power pole which requires climbing up to untie the lines from the isolators."
"I checked if the pole had any rot beforehand, climbed up, untied the lines, climbed down, as I was packing my tools up , the pole fell from its own."- LimaRadek
He wasn't who he claimed to be.
"A man claiming to be a meter reader was in our yard and tried the back door AFTER trying the front."
"It was unlocked because there was a field behind us and our gate had a lock, that he somehow got by."
"The meter reader man was nearly eaten by our Great Dane who was dumb and peaceful, except for when she laid eyes on him."
"Our other dog also wanted to kill him and he was up on our trampoline begging us to call the dogs off, which we, my then 11 year old sister and I, refused to do and went to get our dad, who worked from home."
"The guy escaped while we got our dad and my dad let the police know what happened."
"The real meter reader man came the next week."- ApplesintheorchardDog Bouncing GIF by AFV PetsGiphy
Had no idea what they were witnessing.
"I guess watching a loved one have a seizure when I didn’t understand what it was."
"Legit thought I witnessed a death."
"Scary stuff."- Peppapigisgodly
Always look both ways.
"I got hit by a car while in a crosswalk a few months back."
"Had a split second where I saw him coming and realized what was about to happen."
"I thought I was going to die."- jolalolalulu
Big Sister to the Rescue.
"Saved my sisters life."
"We were boating and my parents just kinda assumed we’d be ok with them only out a couple hundred feet."
"I was about 17 and she was about 7."
"I’m laying there chilling and see her slip and fall into the water and just straight up sink."
"Ran over, dove in and pulled her to shore."
"She spit up a bunch of water and was fine but that experience rocked me to my core."
"Not a super crazy story but almost seeing a sibling die has always stuck with me."
"I’ve broken almost every bone in my body, I died one time and was in a coma for a little bit but for some reason this one stuck with me."- Present-Trip5231
Often, an experience that left us scared does make for a good story down the line.
Though whether it was a good enough story to make having gone through the experience worth it, is debatable.
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Having to work for a living is hard work.
Some jobs come with difficulty and two extra sides of stress.
So the last thing people need is unwarranted hate.
I'm so glad I work from home. Writing alone.
I have issues with me, but that I can deal with.
I do hate internet issues.
But that is warranted.
Redditor PM_ME_URFOOD wanted to talk about the jobs where a ridiculous amount of vitriol is all part of a days work. They asked:
"What profession gets an unjustified amount of hate?"
Waiting tables was always the bane of my existence. Customers are rude. Staff is rude. It never ends.
Filthy HoursFail Just For Laughs GIFGiphy
"Trash men. They’re looked down on as dirty and uneducated, but they do a hard job that is absolutely critical to our public health."
"Youth sports officials. I umpire baseball as a hobby and the way parents act is deplorable."
"The parents on the other hand deserve loads of hate sometimes. I was a coach for soccer and volleyball while I was in the Air Force. You would have loved to be a sports official for our leagues at our base. If a parent got sh**ty they are immediately ejected, no questions, and reported to whoever is their higher authority. It almost never happened."
Behind the Counter
"Any customer (client/patient) facing job. They get the abuse that stems from managements decisions, mistakes and incompetence."
"I did customer service for automotive companies at a call center for years. People get so unhinged, between dealerships, management, people calling into the wrong department, angry customers who were itching for a fight over a rental car. The job paid for five free therapy sessions a year, but honestly, it would take every ounce of restraint not to break some days."
"You aren't allowed to defend yourself or hang up, you can't transfer them to supervisors for a call, you technically work for a third party company that exists to keep the customer from ever actually speaking to the corporation. It was the worst job I've ever had, and that's coming from someone who used to work at a seafood processing plant."
"Food service. The workers have to eat too, you know."
"Working fast food sucked. Not because the job was hard. But because people were *icks. For like, no reason. Working in an actual kitchen also sucked. Not because the work was hard, but because you never did it quick enough and your boss was a *ick for like no reason. But at least you didn't deal with customers."
Too much stress...Jim Carrey Omg GIFGiphy
"Defense attorneys. People hate them because they defend violent criminals. However, as one lawyer put it, their job is not just to defend these people; their job is also to make sure that the cops did their job correctly."
I've always wondered about defense attorneys. How do they reconcile their morals?
They're Smart Toowill birth control GIFGiphy
"I live in Germany and currently in my (hopefully) last semester of university to become a pharmacist (4 years of university, one practical year and three exams of state required). A lot of people here think pharmacists are only cashiers and don’t know we get a scientific education. And God help me if I question a doctor's decision."
"I usually just lurk as a guest, but I made a Reddit account just for this. Cooks for public schools. They are constantly overworked, underpaid, and disrespected. Most schools have only a few ovens and microwaves, so school chefs have to either jam unsafe amounts of frozen food into ovens and microwaves, which is a giant fire hazard, or work non-stop from early morning."
"Plant breeders and plant geneticists. Imagine you're a plant nerd and you spend your life studying genetics so you can figure out how to improve food crops. Like, to make them yield more, taste better, be healthier, survive drought, etc. But on the internet, you're apparently trying to poison the world and control the food supply."
"Veterinarians. My doctors CONSTANTLY get yelled at or called heartless when, for instance, we refer them to a hospital more suited to care for the animal than us. Like bro we didn't just tell you know we are giving you options and trying to ensure you seek the proper care. Don't call me a heartless b**tard for that crap."
No Fun InvolvedAngry Neil Flynn GIFGiphy
"Janitors. Trash-related work. Sewage workers. Plumbing."'
I feel for everyone in these jobs. They deserve better.
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Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
"Giving birth (In the us)"
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
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The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is HardioGIF by VIASWEATGiphy
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
Two Volcanosrachael ray boob sweat GIF by First We Feast: Hot OnesGiphy
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
ExpensiveHappy Music Video GIF by DJ MustardGiphy
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
Attempted MurderBlack Woman Breast Cancer Awareness GIF by Know Your GirlsGiphy
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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