Betrayal hurts. It hurts bad.
Especially when we love and trust the person who has betrayed us. That loss of trust really feels like you have to question everything from then on out. It feels like you might live the rest of your life without your best friend.
But maybe that's for the best.
Here were some of the answers.
Yikes, I Was Still On The Line
Telling his brother after I had called to talk for a bit like we always did "I told you to say I'm not home if they called....." Was upset but it also clued me in to not waste time on that person anymore. Just told him not to worry and that I would talk to him later. Never did, just left it at that.
Whoops, I Dropped The Check Again
When she invited me out to dinner as a Christmas gift, and then when the check was dropped, told me she actually couldn't treat bc she had impulse bought her sh*tty boyfriend a plane ticket when she was drunk the evening before and therefore didn't have the $.
Among other things, but this was the moment when I was really like, wow, my friendship means nothing to her.
Left Me Alone
We graduated from high school and she went to college halfway across the world. When she came back to visit, when I tried to hang out with her she was always too busy. I later saw tons of pictures posted on Facebook with her and other girls having fun together. So that's what she was so busy with.
Then at one point she told me that those girls had actually invited me to everything but she convinced them I wouldn't be able to go. I would have been able to go. I left her alone after that
I see a lot of speculation in the comments so I'll try to clear things up - these girls were all people I'd been going to school with since kindergarten or so. We all knew each other. I was on good terms with the other girls. The girl I'd been best friends with since first grade so I felt loyal to her even though as we got older she got meaner. I've learned better since then.
I have no idea why she said that but when she said it, it was with no malice or shame or anything. Like she was just off handedly stating a fact. I honestly can't figure out why. Maybe she really did think I was busy and it just came out really, really wrong. But it seems deliberate when you do that consistently for 2-3 weeks while everyone was back home.
When I invited her to hang out with me at the nearby lake for my birthday, she said she would get back to me. She never did, instead she posted on her Snapchat story about how much fun she was having with her other friends. I stopped talking to her after that.
While they were driving everyone decided they wanted to party. No one had money so they suggested they should call Varvatos he always has money. I was sitting in the back seat. I was like uh I'm right here and I'm not in the mood to party tonight.
The Harder Way
I found out she was uploading my art to a "bad art blog". I only found out because she sent me 2 paragraphs telling me I was a horrible friend anonymously on tumblr, then when I went to her crying over it wondering who it was she said it was her and then blocked me. I thought I could still fix things but then I found the bad art blog with my art on it, and found out she was talking sh*t about me to her other friends.
I was only 15 and even though its been years since it I'm still f*cked up by it in some ways.
If you don't like someone, don't pretend to like them and make fun of them behind their backs. Just let them know you feel like you can't be friends anymore and distance yourself. Yeah that will hurt in the short term but it won't monumentally f*ck over someones entire psyche as being fake will.
Not Andy's Toys Anymore
2002 and no cell phones or social media and only dial up internet in a small, rural Ontario town. I apologize in advance for the essay length answer.
Andy and I were thick as thieves all through grades 7 and 8. His parents loved me, and I loved them. We hung out every weekend went through all the standard small town adventures together. Chasing girls and hiking from the town center to his house 5 km outside of town on the railroad tracks.
First beers. Real Stand By Me stuff. When I went to a 3 week Royal Canadian Air Cadet summer camp between grades 8 and 9, he was on my mailing list with my parents and grandmother and we exchanged actual old school handwritten letters. I thought we would be friends for life.
Then Grade 9 rolls around. We went to the same Catholic high school, but that school took students from the surrounding towns that didn't have a catholic secondary option. So suddenly we were surrounded new kids from different towns. There was a clique that Andy wanted into. I couldn't care less.
In the middle of September Andy started inviting some of these clique people to our table at lunch. Then more of them, and all of a sudden I'd show up in the cafeteria and the table would be filled with no spot left for me. These were not nice people. At the time I thought it was just ribbing, but looking back they straight up bullied me.
He started having 'family stuff' going on during weekends and after school. It got to the point where I'm pretty sure he was screening my calls and I'd only see him in the class or two that we shared.
My 14th birthday was in mid-November. Right after Halloween I said 'Hey dude. I know we haven't really hung out much the last little while. Did I do something wrong? Are you pissed at me?' He told me no and that he was just busy with being in high school. I took that at face value, happy that my best friend was not mad at me. I told him I was going out to the movies and pizza and run the roads the following Saturday for my birthday. I invited him. He agreed. That was on a Monday. I confirmed with him on the Friday to meet outside the theater on Saturday night around 6:45.
I was super excited, finally getting to reconnect with my best friend. 6:45 rolls around, then 7, then 7:15. I call his house on a payphone. No answer. 7:30 hits. The movie started 10 minutes ago. At 7:45 I try calling his house again. This time his 17 year old sister picks up. I ask for Andy and she says, very matter of factly, 'he's out with [clique friends]. He doesn't want to hang out with you anymore. Seriously, get the picture.' and then hung up on me.
I don't know how long I stood there at the payphone. Bailed on by my best friend on my birthday for some d!ckheads in a clique from an entirely different town. I didn't see a movie or get pizza that night. I just wandered around town in a daze until curfew, then went home and cried.
I went to school on Monday. Our lockers were right across the hall from one another. He didn't show. I walk to homeroom, and see him outside the library doors with some of the clique maybe 25 feet away.
We lock eyes, then he looks away, says something I couldn't make out, then the clique turns and starts laughing at me.
That was more than 16 years ago. I haven't spoken to Andy since that day outside the library, but I did get to be the clique's bullying target for the next two years. I ended up swapping to the public school system in 2004, and Andy sent me a FB friend request literally the day I created my account, but I declined it.
Red In The Head Means I Ain't Wastin Time On You, GirlGiphy
When she told me my husband and I would make hideous babies because red headed babies are the ugliest thing she has ever seen. She also locked me out of our hotel 4 hours from home with no way home at 3 am that same day after an arguement over her saying my husband kills people for a living (he's a chemist who works on developing chemotherapy). That was the last time I've spoken to her, 4 years ago. Such a jealous woman.
When I got an internship at my dream job and she started to pull away more and more until two months went by and I realized she ignored most of my texts and snapchats. After the internship I tried to contact her a few times thinking it was just a product of her being busy with graduation/me being in another state working crazy hours but a mutual friend stepped in and told me she didn't want to be friends with me anymore.
I considered her family, she decided I was very replaceable. It hurt a lot more considering we both used to bond over the fact that our childhoods were filled with "best friends" dumping us for more popular people.
No More Helping And Not Being HelpedGiphy
When my "best friend" had marriage troubles, I was there for him. All through his wife's infidelity, the divorce, and the custody battle. I testified on his behalf in court and he got custody of the kids.
Fast forward 2 years later, when I find out my wife is cheating on me. He's not really interested in talking to me about it so much, and even acts like he's not home when I stop by for a visit. And no, he wasn't the one my wife was cheating with.
He's a good dad and a fun guy to hang around with, but he's just not emotionally available to help other people out much.
The Start Of A Cyberbully
Best friends for a couple of years. We were in different classes, I wrote her a message that I be on my way to her. When I arrived she forgot to alt tab the chat window with someone else making fun of me at the worst possible way. At that time she was my only friend. Was tough to have no friends after that for loooong time - this might not sound like a lot but I think that scared me and I'm still struggling making friends.
I Don't Exist For Your Expense
My senior year of high school, when the group of "friends" had inside jokes about me. They made a game of mentioning these jokes in front of me. When it finally got out I pretty much never talked to them again. After graduation, never seen again.
User To The Nth DegreeGiphy
I gave this person way too many chances.
When she would only have me come over so she could go to a concert. Because her parents liked me and let us go out.
She stopped talking to me for a while but hit me because she was applying for a job and needed "clean urine"
We stopped talking again. Then she would call me to tell me she needed food and money for her son. And then bought drugs.
I've stopped helping her. And she's no longer my "best friend" but I listen when she needs to talk and having a hard time. Do the "man, that really sucks"
I don't hate her. But I've set boundaries. I really hope she gets her life together.
This Was A Test And You Failed HARD
After years of giving me a hard time for eloping, making me promise after my 1st divorce that if I marry again she MUST be invited.... I invited her. She got her mom to babysit her kids, and then went to her ex boyfriends house to f*ck all weekend, totally blowing off my wedding.
My wedding was extremely small. Besides my daughter, she was my only invited guest.
She showed me right there exactly how important I was to her.
For years, my best friend had asked me every summer to go to this sleepaway summer camp in the Poconos with her but my mother wouldn't ever let me go. The year she finally broke down and said I could go, my bestie and I spent weeks shopping and planning and talking about it nonstop. It was going to be glorious - the final summer before junior high.
After her parents dropped us off, however, this b*tch proceeded to flat out ignore me the entire two weeks we were there. She wouldn't even have a two minute conversation with me to tell me what I'd done. I was beyond miserable. All the other kids had been going there every summer and all knew each other and here I was, basically alone in another state, pre-internet and cell phones, totally bewildered and upset because my best friend since kindergarten (and the only other person I knew there) wouldn't so much as look at me. I was miserable. When her parents came to pick us up, I didn't say a damn word the whole two hour trip home and never spoke to her again. To this day I have no idea why the f*ck she acted like that but I'm still a little pissed off.
Makes You Never Want To Make Friends.
When we both tried to get in a frat, i didn't make it and he did which was cool bc we'd still hang out. That is until for the next month him and a few of his new frat pledgees would throw food at me and on at least 4 occasions id be blindsided on campus with them tipping me over, im in a wheelchair. They wore masks so i had no proof to anyone but he was pretty big and i recognized his shoes. he'd then try to still hang around me and act like he never did anything. I didn't really figure it out til about the 3rd time when they tipped me over and thats when i saw his shoes, confirming it.
About a year later he randomly texted me saying how sorry he was for what he did and hoped we could be friends again but by that time i could care less. Turns out he had gotten kicked out of the frat for drug use and now he couch surfs.
There are some questions that illustrate such vulnerability, such open tragedy on the part of the asker that we fend off tears while we come up with an appropriate answer.
Sometimes the question comes from someone who's been so steeped in struggle that they need help understanding that another possible reality exists.
Sometimes it's a question that cuts right to our own core with startling efficiency.
Whatever form it takes, it stops us in our tracks and we're likely to remember it for quite awhile after.
Curious to hear the saddest examples, Redditor julylovestory asked:
"What question has someone asked you that secretly broke your heart?"
Many Redditors responded by sharing the sad questions uttered by young children.
Kids just have the knack for cutting straight through to the essence of it all.
A Tragic Conscientiousness
"As we passed the toy aisle at the store, 'I know you don't have much money right now, but maybe when you get some we could come back and get a toy?' "
"I was not doing well financially back then and my daughter brought me to tears in the middle of the store."
Puzzled and Sad
"First day of preschool for my three year old son. The first time he would ever be away from Mom & Dad at the same time."
"I brought him to the room and expected a meltdown, but instead he confidently strutted, and I do mean strutted into the classroom."
"Three hours later, I picked him up. He was ok until we got to the car when he said, in quiet sad voice 'l thought you were coming with,' followed by an even sadder quieter 'Why did you leave me?' "
" 'Can I wish for my sister?' - A 10-year-old student of mine whose big sister died 4 years ago. We were working on an activity about dreams and aspirations for their futures."
How Bad Must It Be?
"I was like 22 and it was probably 10pm or so at a Walmart. I was on my way to a party and stopped for beer. The store was fairly empty and as I was in the beer aisle, I see this kid completely by himself."
"He was about 5 and at first I thought it was kind of funny because he was trying to pick up a case of beer. I waited like 30-60 seconds, looking around for this kid's mom/dad to come get him. A couple people walked right by him like it was normal, so then I started getting worried. I picked up my two cases of beer and walked over and kindly asked him if he lost his mom or needed help."
"The kid completely ignored the question and instead was thoroughly impressed that I was strong enough to carry two cases of beer. Eventually an employee noticed and came over as well. I told her everything I knew and she took over and told him that she was going to bring him to find his mom."
"As he was walking away he kept looking back at me and I smiled and said goodbye. The kid stopped and said 'can I just come home with you? I don't like my mom.' "
"I was caught off guard so I just laughed and told him the lady was going to help him. Now I'll never know the full story, or what happened to him but the more I think about it - that kid more than likely had a pretty shi**y childhood."
"I mean, the store wasn't busy and it was late at night on a weekday. It really makes you wonder why he was there in the first place, how he got separated from his mom and why would he ask to go with a complete stranger instead of worrying about where his mom was?"
"It still makes me sad. Hope everything worked out for the little dude."
Others talked about the times when they or somebody else realized just how tragic their own circumstances were.
"My ex asked me what I liked to do with my family growing up."
"Made me realize my family never did anything together and I literally had no answer to such a basic question."
Seeing Another Version
"During college, parents took a friend and I out to dinner. Very normal dinner, chit chatted about whatever. After we left and were walking back to my car, he turns to me and says 'Is that what a normal relationship is like?' "
"We talked more after that, I had met his parents a few times and they seemed strict but never seemed to have a terrible relationship. Turned out apparently his dad had cheated on his mom multiple times, dad had zero respect for any of my friends sisters and essentially expected them to do all the housework while the men did 'guy stuff.' "
"Hunting, training for sports, school, etc. Turned out his childhood was pretty fu**ed, dad was never around and he had to essentially be the father figure in the house. As the oldest child, never really saw a normal loving relationship that he could look up to."
"My friend is a really nice guy, still has some messed up views of relationships though. I never realized how 'abnormal' my very normal family/childhood was."
A Better Place
" 'You've never beaten me or told me I couldn't do something. Is that normal?'
"My first girlfriend told me that. I have never felt such a wave of anger, sadness, and heartbreak wash over me like I did when I heard that"
And some people discussed the time a question destroyed their social confidence.
Worst Teacher Ever
"I have a stutter, when I was a kid I had to read a page of a book to the class. I stuttered, and the teacher said 'can you even read' and that fu**ing broke my 13 year old heart."
"No one takes stuttering seriously."
There's the Answer
"When I was 19, I hung out with a cute girl from my high school that I never got to hang with when we were in school. Had a great day together, and that night she asked, 'can we be like secret friends or something? I don't really hang out with people like you.' "
"Never hung out again."
Comparing and Contrasting
" 'Oh, are you the girl with the hot sister ?' " -- JustehOK
"I worked in a department with two Melissas. One day, I was sitting next to one Melissa when we overheard another coworker say to someone, 'have you seen little Melissa?' "
"The other Melissa got kind of a defeated look in her eye and said, 'oh, I'm big Melissa.' " -- EarhornJones
It's a list that's sad enough to leave one wondering about the questions they've received that struck them as particularly hopeless.
Sometimes, though, that vulnerability can be the start of accepting new realities and new possibilities.
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If you live on this earth and you're fortunate enough to form long-lasting relationships with different people, chances are you'll know the pain of heartbreak. It's an unavoidable fact of life.
We are not guaranteed to stay with one person forever, as we were reminded once Redditor disturbance of mirrors asked the online community,
"People whose long-term relationship faded, what was the final straw that made you realize it was time to call it a day?"
"The last time..."
"When she 'broke up' with me for the 12th time.
We had a long-distance relationship and whenever we had an issue or a disagreement, instead of engaging in a conversation with me about it, she would say we were done and shut me out for two or three days before coming back and manipulating me into groveling for her forgiveness. The last time, I just said no to going back and stuck to it. She freaked out and tried to drive 6 hours to my place at 2:00 a.m... I got a call from her mom saying she had left in the middle of the night as a head's up and, upon finally getting ahold of her when she was just a couple of hours away, I was able to convince her to turn back.
That relationship f***** me up for a while but, once I began dating my now fiancee, it was unbelievable to me how wonderful a real, loving relationship with healthy communication can be."
"Her brother was living with us..."
"Mine was not a slow burn like most seem to be, but a very definitive moment.
Her brother was living with us and this was right when WiFi was becoming available to the general public. We couldn't afford it cuz we were broke kids, so her brother would take my GF's MacBook (it was a gift) and sit on a nearby bus bench and leech off someone's unsecured WiFi.
Well, one day we get a call from her sister and she says we need to get home immediately. Turns out some guys came up and asked him for change for a $20 and when he told them he didn't have it they tried to snatch the Mac and jump in their car.
He knew it wasn't his so he held onto it and tried to get it back but they were too much. He had gotten dragged by the car, kicked in the head, and then had his leg run over. He was in pretty bad shape.
As we turn the corner (didn't know what had happened yet) GF sees cop cars and an ambulance and says "This better not have anything to do with my Mac. We walk in and he's visibly in bad shape and she is just immediately "Did you lose my Mac?" I'll never forget his face. He was so ashamed and felt terrible and just started crying. She however started screaming my computer! My computer! And hitting him. To the point where the cops considered arresting her. It was an instant eye-opener."
"I'd sit in my car..."
"I'd sit in my car after work playing on my phone for like an hour because I just needed a break before going inside and dealing with him."
That would do it.
"I would find any excuse..."
"I would find any excuse to work late or sometimes go sit at a bar by myself just to avoid the misery at home. We divorced."
"He was a workaholic..."
"He was a workaholic to the point that I saw him about 6 days per month."
"Somewhere between giving up on small talk and not looking forward to the weekends anymore."
That's no way to live.
"It really forced us..."
"Honestly it was the pandemic. It really forced us to actually spend time together and I realized we kind of just didn't do much together at all. I had spent years thinking it was cool that we kept our own friends and space but once those distractions were taken away it was just really clear to me that we were more roommates than a couple."
"When I realized..."
"When I realized I was needed and not wanted. Constantly trying to make someone happy who didn't want to be happy."
This one hurts. I've been there myself. (And I have also been that person––I thankfully got help.)
"We lived together..."
"We lived together but lived completely separate lives. Basically a housemate I shared a bed with. Happened twice to me so far."
"I would have moved mountains for him..."
"I knew it was over when I cared more about his wellbeing than he cared about his own wellbeing. I would have moved mountains for him if it made his life easier and he just continuously put himself in shi!ty situations. I eventually just gave up. I can't be with someone who doesn't care about themselves. Thank God that's over."
If you think you might be stuck in a pointless or unhealthy relationship, it's worth evaluating your options. And it's never worth sticking around and risking your emotional and mental health.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below.
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There is always that "one." There is always going to be that person.
That person who you will always remember. And when they are the one who you regret losing most... they are the ghost that will haunt you forever.
I have a few escapees. I'll never know how it would've turned out. But that is part of why I'm haunted. I need to discuss....
Redditor u/AssistantNo1733 wanted to discuss all the times we've lost in love by asking:
Who's the one who got away?
Do we even have a clue that they're the "one" that got away? How long until it sinks in? And how do we not know there isn't another "one" coming behind them? I have no answers. Just asking...
The DraftEpisode 1 Omg GIF by RuPaul's Drag RaceGiphy
"The girl who summoned up the nerve to ask me out towards the beginning of high school. I was so humiliated by the life my family was living that I stalled until she gave up."
"Betsy, if by some stroke of dumb luck you're reading this... I'm so sorry. It was 25-27 years ago, but I still hate myself for that. You were beautiful, intelligent, a good person, and if I had anything resembling a stable, presentable home I would've said yes in a heartbeat... I had a crush on you since 7th-grade 'intro to drafting.'
I Love Her
"Weird, I was just confiding in my mom about this last night. I'm late but for catharsis's sake I'm going to post. My first girlfriend is a classic case of you don't know what you have until it's gone. She's the complete package. Beautiful, intelligent, compassionate, and so kind. We started dating when I was 17 and broke up when I was 21."
"For reference I'm 30 now. I was an idiot. I wanted to play the field. I wanted to party and hook up with college girls. It was fun at first but after a while I felt this gnawing hole in my heart. The feeling of doubt crept up slowly and still, a decade later my chest feels tight thinking about it."
"I didn't realize until my later serious relationships that getting along with your SO's family is so important. Her mom and step dad genuinely treated me like a part of their family. It's not a stretch to say I literally grew up with these people. I spent some of my most formative years with them. Birthdays, Thanksgivings, Christmases, you name it. They celebrated me and my accomplishments. They genuinely cared about me. Just amazing, salt of the earth, lovely people."
"Her birthday was in March and I sent her a text and we ended up talking for a bit. She's happily married and stable with a daughter and a second on the way. I'm genuinely so happy for her. She deserves happiness. I just wish I was a part of that. Sitting at work 10 years later I'm tearing up. I numbed myself out to it for years, it's so strange to me that I've been so stuck on her lately. Is this normal?"
15 Years Later
"My very first real love. I was a teenager and I didn't really know how to be comfortable in myself or with myself. I played silly teen girl games and lost him even as a friend. Now 15 years later I still think about R from time to time. I genuinely hope he's happy in his life."
"Edit: Wow this blew up while I was sleeping. Thanks for all the sweet words and to everyone with their "one" congratulations! I suppose I hadn't looked him up on social media because I'm scared, scared he won't respond, scared he will respond, scared he'll think I'm a stalker. I'm in a happy relationship now, but what if... Etc etc etc. But I'll give it a Google."
Missed You Muchrhythm nation dance GIF by Janet JacksonGiphy
A girl I dated in high school. Went on a date one time she took me out parking and I was too stupid to realize it.
"She always talked about moving away as soon as she got finished with high school. I always thought I would stay in a little town the rest of my life. Turns out I was the one who left and move to another state. Later I heard that she had told someone that I knew that she thought that we would be married at some point. Missed it by that much."
Ok... I've been a bit blind to the light. People can be cruel, but also highly creative. Why not just lead with the truth? It'll always hurt more after lies.
Chuck E.Chuck E Cheese Wink GIFGiphy
"Ah the rare AskReddit question I can answer."
"I met a wonderful woman circa 2013-2015. We worked at what I can best describe as an upscaled Chuck E Cheese. Or ghetto Six Flags. Your choice."
"We hit it off instantly, though at the time I was rather romantically inept. Eventually, she says she's leaving to join the Air Force. I tell her I'll miss her, and wished her well. The thought of asking for her number so we could stay in contact didn't even cross my mind."
"Cue the next day, I stop for lunch on my way to work, and as I'm walking to my car I hear my name being called. I turn around, and it's her, running toward me. Universe giving me a second chance, right? Wrong. My dumb butt still didn't ask for her number. She looked a little upset, and I still think about her often. Desiree, I hope you're doing well."
"He was my first and last love. I was 16 and he was 18 when we met. We bounced around like idiots, on again off again, finally got together mid 20s. We both fell into bad habits - drugs and alcohol, more booze for me, more drugs for him. We had some bad things happen that were pretty detrimental to staying sober. We would split, reconcile, get sober, fall off the wagon, split, etc... repeat as necessary. We realized we were very bad for each other unless we could BOTH just get sober for ourselves, and split."
"Ten years later, I was sober for 7 years (still am, going on 18 years end of this month, actually! Woo, go me!) and he was beginning to come back, sober about a year. He contacted me, we met, talked about trying again. He said that once he had been totally clean for a year, we'd do it. That whole "Don't make any changes for a year" thing. I would visit him, tho, things were good."
"He woke up one morning feeling bad, thought he had the flu. (This was pre-now) I stayed around because he was sick, but neither of us thought he was drastically bad, just the flu, right? He got worse and worse, finally we called an ambulance because he got up from a nap and couldn't breathe. He died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. Aortic dissection."
"He got away, but someday I'll see him again. I never stopped loving him, and him me. We just weren't good for each other."
Ce la vie...
"My most serious Ex."
"Don't think I truly understood love until I met her. Loved her more than I ever thought I could love anything. It eventually ended when she told me that, through no fault of my own, she had fallen out of love with me. That was 2 years ago, still hurts to think/talk about."
"Ce la vie..."
"I'm in the middle of trying to avoid that right now actually."
"It's not worth the heartache trust me. I fought to stay in a relationship for an entire year. If I would've just let her go the first time she wanted there would've been a lot less pain. We would've left on good terms. I would've lost a lot less sleep. Rip the band-aid off because once the band-aid starts peeling it's inevitable it'll fall off with time."
Sweet...Kim Tate Eye Roll GIF by EmmerdaleGiphy
Damn man why bring this up.
"My ex and I broke up over 3 years ago. Mutual breakup through a lack of communication on both ends I feel."
"Thought I was over that hill until this week she messaged just to say hey and ask an innocent question. We text for the best part of the day and it's brought up a lot of old feeling. Feeling pretty bitter sweet right now."
Love is a mess. Why even bother trying if you can't be true? It's not hard to just spell out the situation. And if you're the one needing to put together the words... look closer. The dialogue shouldn't be difficult.
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What are the odds you'd click on this link today?
What was the biggest coincidence that made you question the fabric of reality?
There's small coincidences, occurrences so minute that you wouldn't even notice them if you weren't paying attention. However, once someone makes a big deal out of them then there's no other choice but to acknowledge that what just happened was spectacular.
Each Having A Buddy Coming To Town
"My friend and I were on a road trip a few years ago and needed a place to stay. We both told each other we had a friend in the city we were going through, so we figured we'd be able to crash with one of them. Turns out our two friends were roommates and had both been telling each other that they had a friend coming to town soon."
What's That Got To Be? A 1 in 1000 Chance?
"Several years ago I was at a coffee shop with some friends and one of them had an ipad, another friend went to unlock it and asked him what his 4 digit unlock code was, so I just blurted out 4 random digits pretending like I knew it, and it actually worked. I had never unlocked it before or knew of the same numbers being used for anything else, or his phone number, etc."
Both Probably Assumed What The Best Time Was
"I passed out after receiving a flu shot when I was 28. The nurse who helped me up kept asking if I wanted my mom. It seemed like a really weird thing to offer an adult woman - the option to have her mother phoned and brought in - so I was really confused and getting progressively more annoyed at her repeatedly asking...
...until my mom walked up to me. She had the appointment after mine to get vaccinated. The nurses assumed we had come together, but neither of us knew about the other's appointment, and we lived an hour away from each other in different cities."
Living in such a big world can lead you to the conclusion that math is silly and odds are never in your favor. With over seven billion people roaming around, chances of meeting someone of significance?
Less than you think.
A Simultaneous Love Of Traveling
"This guy I went to grade school and high school with, an acquaintance at best. I've seen him in 5 different locations in different countries throughout the last 15 years.
Disney World when I was a kid.
Some beach bar in Thailand.
The Bean in Chicago.
A pub in Budapest.
A library in San Jose, Costa Rica.
We've become friends due our love of traveling, but neither of us post on social media and neither of us communicated with each other our plans to travel. We never talked outside of the random meetings. Now if I see him, its like the world wants us to have a beer together. haha"
"I Mean, The Crash, Yeah, But How Have You Been?"
"My dad lives in a national park here in Australia. It's farmland that's grandfathered in. It's the remnants of a volcano that blew itself up very violently, so it's very hilly terrain.
One day we were sitting out on the deck, when we see a hang-glider come down halfway down the valley, and it didn't look like a nice landing. "Sh-t, we better see if he's alright, they don't land anywhere near here"
So we get in the car, drive for about 10 minutes to reach the spot. We head over to the guy who is standing by a very damaged glider. The pilot is staring at us incredulously, he stammers "F-ck, Jack, is that you?".
My dad, who hasn't seen his childhood friend for 35 years shouts "F-ck, Tim, is that you?".
They both grew up in Greymouth, NZ. Found each other randomly after a glider crash in NSW, Australia."
Takes A Wedding To Bring People Together
"My wife and I were looking to hire a caterer for our wedding and when we met, my wife and her started talking about their lives a bit.
Turns out they had both literally grown up on the same street, in a city of 10 million people, on the other side of the world. Both had left the city around a decade before immigrating to our current country.
They knew the same people, had hung out at the same coffee place, attended the same church. They even used to grab mangoes off the same large tree that hung over the wall of one of the large houses in the neighbourhood.
But they had never met one another until meeting on almost the exact opposite side of the planet, in a small town of about 50,000 people."kor_hookmaster
What we can gain from these experiences is a coincidence will occur more than you think, you just have to have the eyes sharp enough to spot them.
But how would you explain these?
Position Is Key
"I dialed my mum on my mobile when I was on public transport and accidentally swapped two numbers around.
The person I called was on the same carriage."
"Go on, tell us what happened then!"
"So I was listening to my phone and at the exact moment it started the ringing sound I heard a phone start ringing and I thought it was a coincidence but then the phone answered and it wasn't mum.
All I said was "Oh, are you on the Upfield train?" and they said "Yes, who's this?" but I got shy and I hung up.
Poor guy must have been so confused."
Universal Echoes Bringing You Closer Together
"One time, me and my dad were discussing his friend while out driving at night without many other cars on the road. As we were talking, we pulled up to a red light, and the car waiting in front was my dad's friend. He didn't even live close to there."
Extremely Unlucky Odds. Go Buy A Lottery Ticket.
"A couple of years ago I was visiting my hometown and decided to sit on a bench at my favorite park. As I was sitting, I felt something land on my head. Bird poop. After heading home and washing my hair, I went back into town. While I walked around, I watched as a guy got hit with a drop of sky sh-t. As I was laughing about the apparent irritable bowel syndrome of the birds in my town, a bird flying right over me drops a fat sh-t on my head."
There's no magic at play. All of these happenstances can be explained away with simple math and rudimentary probability.
Still, it's fun to live when you're in the moment.