Once we become of age, we suddenly start learning things about our family that we weren't told as children. And let's face it, some things you just don't want to know.
Now THAT'S a story.
A few years ago one of my Dad's cousins did one of those DNA kits. A few weeks later she was contacted and told that there was several close relatives in their data base that aren't listed on the family tree she made.
It turns out that my Great Grandfather faked his death in a life insurance scam and then started a new family on the other side of the country. He never got in contact with my Great Grandmother or his children with her (my Grandfather and his sister). It kinda of crazy because he only passed away a few years before this all came to light.
Talk about a double life.Giphy
After my uncle died of a heart attack a few years ago, it came out that he was the leader of a sex cult thing. His wife and 5 kids had no idea and I think his wife is still in denial.
Whenever his kids go to clean off the grave (at least initially, I don't think it's happened lately) there are usually adult toys on it that they have to throw away
Not super creepy but definitely a crazy curveball.
At least they got some money out of it.
My grandma and her 9 siblings are very close. So when they each got a call saying a family member had died and they had inherited a large sum of money they thought it was a scam. Turns out their very strict and religious father had a secret affair and an additional child, Marie.
Well, Marie now in her 80s had passed away, so had her husband. They had no children. So the closest relatives were my grandma and her siblings. And that's how 10 religious people in their 70s and 80s learned their dad had cheated on their mom and they had a half sister they never got to meet.
My dad once found a mummified human foot just chilling in a trunk in his basement.
My grandfather was an orthopedic surgeon who was stationed in New Guinea during WW2 and by all accounts was never quite the same after the war. Our best guess regarding the foot is that it belonged to one of his patients and either had some sort of abnormality my grandfather found interesting, or he was just super proud of the amputation job he did.
My dad and his buddy, who were 12 or 13 at the time, naturally decided that the best course of action was to hang the foot from the front porch of the girl they were crushing on. And apparently no one in town batted an eye over it other than thinking it was a good prank.
Dodged a bullet.
My Mom told me this over dinner a few years back like it was no big deal. When I was six, my grandma mother side, wanted me to sleep over at her place for the weekend. Its noteworthy, that she never really liked me. I remember her as a cold witch (six year old brain). Her housekeeper was nicer to me than she was.
My Mom said no, she wouldn't let me sleep over at her moms.
Granny got really angry, saying something along the lines of you will regret this.
So she didn't hear from her for a while and went to the house to check up on her. Granny had killed herself with sleeping pills.
Here is where it gets creepy. My mom found her diary and her last entry were things like, granddaughter (me) is rotten, needs to be killed and it's her job to do so. My name was in her calendar for that weekend. Basically my grandma wanted to kill me when I was six. I'm really glad my mom trusted her gut and said no to the deadly sleepover.
My father's parents both died in the '90s. Around 5-10 years ago I did a 23 and Me test, mostly for kicks and to look out for any health issues. Last year I was contacted by someone through the service who was trying to find blood relatives because both of her parents had been adopted as infants, and we had a pretty strong genetic connection.
Long story short, my grandfather had an affair in the 1950s and fathered twins. My aunt and uncle were pretty floored to find out they have half-siblings. (My father died 4 years ago from suicide, so he never knew.)
To get even weirder, my mother grew up with these twins after they had been adopted. She was friends with my father's half-siblings decades before she married him.
Oh my god.Giphy
My Aunt and Uncle had their oldest daughter lobotomized because she was was probably a bit mentally ill, was very combative with them and was in her teens and becoming interested in sex. This was in the late 1960's.
My father never spoke to his brother again over this. We had no contact with them whatsoever when I was growing up. My Mom and Dad told me what happened a couple of years ago.
That actually happens in real life?
My grandfather had a literal "crazy aunt who lives in the attic."
His father's sister had some sort of mental illness, and they were apparently worried about how that would look for the family, so they locked her in the attic of his boyhood home Jane Eyre style and basically just kept her fed and otherwise ignored her. I found out about this when he briefly mentioned it a few years ago like it was an entirely normal thing to do with a family member.
My cousin Erik died of AIDS-related cancer. He never told anyone about a partner, and he died essentially with no contact with anyone outside of his family.
I was maybe eight when he passed and I don't think I met him more than once. He was only in his twenties.
My grandmother was addicted to those speed diet pills in the late 1960s and had a collection of wigs that she used to impersonate other people to pick up their prescriptions. itsashleyjohn
That my grandpa was a drug addict and was eventually cast out of the family. My aunt woke up one night to find him in the house... Talking to a real estate agent. He snuck in and tried to SELL THEIR HOUSE while they were asleep. He also "double mortgaged" their house, so he got basically all my Nan's income.
When my Nan tried to move the family away from him she realized she had almost no money due to this. Bank director said it was okay because men are supposed to control the bank account. She was stuck there because of him, and he was leeching off their money and there was nothing she could do about it. ErrorArtError
Oh that Family Tree.
My grandma had six children. I always thought my oldest uncle looked and acted different from the rest of the siblings. When I was 24 I found out he didn't share the same father as the rest of them. But that isn't the juiciest part... his real dad is my grandpa's brother. SmartyLox
That's a Mini-series.
My grandpa (my mothers father) killed his First wife.
My great-grandmother tried to Kill my grandma (my moms mother) several times when she still was a Child.
My mom had an affair with her sisters husband.
My dad got killed because of a wrecked car. ju_ri_
The Better "Black" Sheep.Giphy
Not really a well-kept secret, but one of my cousins was(is?) a Neo-Nazi.
It's safe to say no matter how bad I screw up my life, I'll never be the black sheep in the family. aswaninapond
I sense Something.
I always thought I was born of an affair between my my parents, who were both married to other people at the time. Last year, my grandmother told me that in fact, my dad and his first wife wanted a son, but had a daughter. They tried to buy my mom's son (my older half-brother) from her, but my mom wouldn't sell.
Instead, they agreed to give my mother $10k to have another baby. The deal somehow fell through after my dad had gotten my mom pregnant, my dad went to prison and got divorced from his first wife, and the first wife tried to steal me from the hospital. cshock91
The Crazy Shame.
Maybe more sad then creepy. My great grandfather died in a mental institution. However, everyone who asked was told he died in prison... Because it was less shameful in the 30's than being crazy. imminent_riot
Tell me the Story.Giphy
Nobody can give me a straight answer on why my great uncle died before the age of 10. It's likely he died due to negligence but everyone gives a different story. AnalRetentiveAnus
My parents are directly responsible for at least 8 deaths due to 'workplace accidents' over the years. Indirectly responsible for probably hundreds more thanks to family interests in chemistry and mining.
Grandparents on both sides were also more than a little helpful to the Nazis during WWII, resulting in a lot more deaths over time on on side and a lot more $ to the family coffers. Lazy_Raccoon
He had a Type.
My dad secretly named me after his "one true love" (not my mother). She was 12. He was in his late 20's.
He told me the first bit when I was in my 20s, which was bad enough. When he died I inherited his papers and stuff and found out the rest, which TBH I could have happily lived without knowing.
Apparently he was staying on and off at Greyhaven, Marion Zimmer Bradley's sort of artist/pedophile commune. And he had named me after one of the victims in that whole crap show. She does look like very very similar to my mom (and therefore to me)... guess he had a type. underpantsbandit