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People Share The Rudest Assumption Someone Has Ever Made About Them

People often rush to judgement with no basis for their opinions, and it can hurt. Like putting down others for holding certain jobs, or assuming that only children are jerks.

bloblife34 asked: What is the rudest assumption someone has made about you?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


15. Why do people shame honest work?

I went to Walmart while taking a break from painting the nursery. I was fairly spattered in paint and trying to pick a pizza. I heard a lady tell her kid "that is why you go to school so you don't have a job like that." There are layers to just how f*cked up that was. Not the least of which is house painters can make pretty decent money.

Mostlyaverageish

The stupidest thing is that a lot of people that work with their hands make hella monies. Like plumbers make bank, and they will always be in need because we will always need to take sh*ts.

MajorAcer

14. It costs $0.00 to not do this.

At a a past employer someone complained to HR that I was allegedly playing inappropriate Rap music and too loudly at my desk. I get called into HR to explain myself and told them it wasn't me…it was the white guy sitting two desks behind me and he came in to admit it because he didn't think it was such a big deal to be in trouble for.

It was probably the fact that since I was the only black guy where I sit in a certain part of the office, they just naturally assumed it was me. You can imagine the sheer embarrassment on part of HR that came after.

Edit: Rather than raise fire and brimstone, I just gently let them down and told them it was fine, let's move on and try to forget it. I just thought it'd be more professional to just do that so there would be no animosity in the future.

MortimerToKill

13. What does this even mean?

I had an Emergency Room doctor tell me I looked like an anti-vaxxer.

LunarLizzy37

ER doctors are notorious for being dicks. Encountered my share of them. When I went in for a miscarriage, the ER doctor said "most women take care of that at home by themselves" :(.

I think there is a lot more PTSD and compassion fatigue in the medical field than they care to admit.

NewWorldCamelid

12. Dating is embarrassing.

Someone thought "just because I'm ugly id date anyone."

Blitzboi01

"Why won't you date her? Are you gay?"

"No, I just don't like her"

"But she is prettier than you... "

Happens strangely often, even if not with those exact words.

Auguschm

Conversely, gay people have preferences too and won't date somebody just because they're gay.

elcarath

11. At least you look young?

I was in target and stopped to look at a really cute swim suit for a baby that was on display in the aisle. Two older ladies passed by and one of them said "she's way too young to have a child" nose in the air. I was in my mid 20s, probably the same age or older than she was when she had kids.

ndhlpplse

I got really dirty looks when I was an au pair and I had two boys to take care of 2 and 4, the 2 y.o. couldn't say my name so he called me da. Some ladies heard that and they said to each other down disgusting I was to have to kids so young.

Also when I was 14 my niece was born, I liked to take her on walks. One time I was with my sister, and some woman asked us why we didn't got an abortion because we were to young to raise a child. My sister got angry at the woman, so the woman kept her mouth shut and walked away.

Why don't people mind their own business, when they don't know the relationship between people.

Dutch_Rayan

This happened to me so much. My brother was born when i was 16. People were so f*cking rude. Even if they didnt say anything they glared. People liked to make comments about closing my legs.

_Pixality_

10. Racism is alive and well in America.

That I'm probably just some uneducated immigrant who can't speak English.

I'm Mexican, I drive a truck for a living. I make more doing this than putting my bachelor's to use. I don't talk much because I'm tired, grumpy and depressed all of the time.

InternetAccount00

Long haul truckers make more than me with my 2 fancy degrees, yeah.

Fufu-le-fu

I was talking with a friend of mine in Spanish (mine is pretty poor, I was practicing) outside of a bar after work, and some old white guy walked by and told me "don't encourage the Mexicans, make them learn English!" My buddy just rolled his eyes, dude was working on an English degree through Texas Tech.

RocketPoweredRedneck

9. You never know when someone is in pain.

That I was being horribly disrespectful in a church ceremony.

In reality I was my little sisters Confirmation sponsor (Catholic rite) and was also in end stage liver failure. Was on lots of meds for pain and my brain was marinating in ammonia so I had several head drops (like when you're falling asleep) during the 2 hour mass. Woman next to me berates me for being 'so rude and disrespectful'

Luckily my mom found her afterwards and tore her a new one.

greffedufois

Did you seize that hag's liver and make it your own?

nursebeast

Nah, would've been too fatty anyways (lady was quite hefty) my aunt was in the process of getting tested and was a match about a month or two later. September 30 2009 we went into surgery and 14 hours later I came out. Celebrating my 10th liverversarry this year! Going to send her an awesome bouquet and maybe a spa certificate. She was my living donor of course so I got about 75% of her liver. Now we both have full grown healthy livers!

It's really hard to adequately thank someone for saving your life.

It's also weird to think that while I'm 28, my liver is 57.

greffedufois

8. Well that's rude.

I worked with a girl who came from a big family and when I told her that I'm an only child, she went on a rant about how I must be spoiled and that my parents "f*cked me up" by doing everything for me. As if that's the only outcome that an only child could have.

house-cat

My (only) sister died when I was 15, when people I don't particularly know or like very well ask me if I have siblings, I usually just say no - I don't like to talk about it and it's a conversation killer. But it's surprising how many have replied with: 'oh, only child? You must have been spoiled.' I love then saying: 'well I had a sister but she died.' The look on their face is priceless 😂 Keep your judgements to yourselves, people.

quashroom

7. Sexism, no fun.

When I was working at Best Buy in my teens/early 20's, people would ask me to my face if I could go and get a "male" worker to answer their questions because they felt "more comfortable" asking them about it (stuff like game consoles, cameras and equipment, ipods, that was the area I worked in). The fun part was watching the customers faces malfunction that male coworker would walk them back over to me, because I knew what I was doing in that department and they only knew their stuff when it came to TVs or washers and dryers.

misswhitnum

6. We are not short we are fun-sized.

A girl I met for a date on an app once said to me at the end of the date that I should see her again because a guy of my height won't have many options.

DukeInterior

I don't understand this height obsession. My ex was my height and it didn't bother me. He even added two inches for his hair on his license height but I knew the truth.

itsjudgetrudyyall

Yeah it's weird. It was also a weird way of putting herself down as well, 'you can't get anyone else, so settle for me.'

DukeInterior

5. Poor assumption.

That I'm lazy because I really enjoy video games. Bitch, I have a full-time job, House, car, wife, and a dog. I also do most of the cooking, cleaning, dog-walking, and general chores around the house because my wife works crazy hours. Lazy my ass.

theslyturtle

4. Pity date? Ouch.

That I was stupid enough not to figure out that the guy I had a crush on in middle school was paid to go on a date with me as a joke. 10+ years later I'm still pissed. Though based on how he's doing now I dodged a real bullet there lmao

eh0kay

3. I mean same though.

I was hanging out a friend and it had been about a month after we had met etc, and they said, "The best thing about you is that you're happy being mediocre." This felt especially bad as at that time in my life, I had just had a string of failures and was already pretty down.

universaladaptoid

2. Just blow it off.

I have ADHD so I talk fast, I'm super tall and lanky and also suffer from all year around allergies. Multiple times I've been told I have a cocaine addiction.

Typical_Stormtrooper

This is very funny. For about 10 years my friends had convinced me that one of my friends was a blow addict because of the same afflictions you suffer from.

They had me convinced he was injecting that into his toes.

He also used to work at a pizza joint and would bring pizza by just because, and they also had me convinced that it was to pay off his blow debt.

Assh*les lol

shorinman

1. Boomers are the worst.

"No wonder you're so depressed you're a lazy millennial who thinks everything is handed to him."

overcookedpopsicle

This is so common. They say it right to your face too and think its acceptable. They'll sh*t all over an entire generation right to that generations face.

Devanismyname

They and their peers bore and raised the generation they say are slagging off. Baffles me.

northatlanticpenny

Right, they where the parents who came up with participation trophies.

Launchsuppedelux

The Best Pickup Lines Of All Time

A Redditor asked: 'what's the best pickup line of all time?'

shallow photography of man hugging woman outdoors
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

When it comes to flirting, everyone has their preferences of how they like to be flirted with. Some people like cleverly crafted pickup lines.

I always thought pickup lines were a cheap way to get someone's attention. That being said, there are some good ones out there. I've been on the receiving end of both. "On a scale from one to America, how free are you tonight?" and, "You must be the square root of two because I feel irrational around you."

Both got me to engage in conversation, and I even dated the guy who used the first one for a while.

I'm not the only one that knows some good pickup lines. Redditors have both heard and used some pickup lines and are eager to share their favorites.

It all started when Redditor Sauce_Dealer420 asked:

"What's the best pickup line of all time?"

Read It And See

"You put the sexy in dyslexic."

– koookyko

"This made me laugh so hard."

"Because I can read properly."

– TappedIn2111

I'm Hooked

"This girl I used to work with and I went to a bar after work and we’re having fun, and she leans over to tell me a joke. And she says:"

"Three boy mice and a girl mouse were all stuck in a room with no doors and no windows. One of the boy mice asked the girl mouse how to get out and she said, “Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.""

"The next day, he is gone. The second boy mouse asks the girl mouse how he got out and she says, “Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.""

"Next day, he’s gone too."

"So now the girl telling me this joke says to me, “Do you want to know how the last mouse gets out of the box?”

"And I say “yes.""

"And she says, “Sleep with ME tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning”. All this while staring me in the eyes and smiling."

"I said, “Check please bartender!!""

"I forgot to ask her in the morning, but that was the best pickup line I’ve ever heard."

– reb678

Statistics

"The odds we sleep together are 50% because half of us agree so far."

– AlfheimKitteh

"Math is always super sexy."

– Acceptable-News-6811

Money, Money, Money

"Hey girl, are you the English financial system? Because I'm about to give you a weak pound."

– onemanwolfpack21

"Yo girl, do you know exchange rates? Because Euro 10."

– kkirchhoff

Winner, Winner

""Are you a magician? Cuz every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.""

"This line got me a wife and three kids. 😊"

– PRSHZ

One Liners

"Are you a beaver? Cuz damn."

– Starry_Night-

"If you were a fruit you'd be a fineapple."

– Slainna

"Hi, do you want to go for a ride on a Harley?"

"(My name is Harley) 😁"

– OMNIxvTRIX

No Losers

"If I asked you for a date would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this question?"

– SchemePale6222

"I got blue screen in my head."

"Explain please."

– TastyToothpasta

"You can't lose. Say no, the answer is yes. Say yes, the answer is also yes."

"Dang sounds kinda creepy writing it out like that. Still clever wordplay though."

– Steeze_Schralper6968

Clever

"My go-to was always:"

"I used to be a history teacher, so I know lots of important dates. Want to help me make another one?"

"A little corny, but it usually worked."

– StuffToday

Refreshing

"That one actually worked with my ex on the first try."

"-Hey, do you like water?"

"-Yes."

"-Then you like me in 70% already."

– azurskyy

Sneaky

"Would you date a complete stranger?"

"If she says “yes” you’re in."

If she says “no.”

“Then allow me to introduce myself.”"

– Blastspark01

Playing Coy

"Once a girl came to me and told there was somebody who thought I was cute."

"I asked her who and she said “Me.""

– evil_boy4life

Prop Lines

"You have to have a handful of limes available to do this:"

"Hold the limes, drop the limes in front of the lucky person. Then say 'Sorry, I'm not very good at pick up limes.'"

– cannibalcats

Egg-cellent

"Best one that worked for me was:"

"Me: How do you like your eggs?"

"Her: Over easy, why?"

"Me: Just making sure I have things right for when I make you breakfast in the morning."

– Radiant_Boss4342

The Best Line

"How you doin?"

– 2x4x93

"There was a time when this was the ONLY line you could use!"

– JohnsLong_Silver

That line would definitely work on me!

United States political map
Clay Banks on Unsplash

Twenty years ago, a question about politics and dating might have elicited very different answers.

But a large part of the United States seems to be getting more radicalized and more polarized.

While two decades ago most liberal versus conservative differences in the United States were about government size or spending, now it's about who has a right to exist or have body autonomy.

Keep reading...Show less
Man peeking through window blinds
Photo by Chris Nguyen on Unsplash

Let's be honest: It's 2023, and times are pretty hard for most of us. We're all just out here, trying to do our best.

But while our instincts sometimes really save our butts, there are other times that our curiosity and impulses might get carried away.

In fact, they might get so carried away, we might find ourselves in some deep, deep trouble.

Redditor Mr_Manta asked:

"How has morbid curiosity screwed you over?"

A Troubling Find

"I found a human femur when I was a teenager and decided to take it home and hide it so I could inspect it."

"I was on exchange in Spain at the time. I didn’t know what to do with it after I brought it home, so like an id**t, I put it in my luggage five weeks later when I flew back home to my family."

"Airport security and I had really, really, really, really, really long talk."

"Edit: To answer all your questions, my friend and I had taken a walk to some cemetery in a roadside town. The population was 81. We thought the town had been abandoned, by the looks of it. We were dumb kids."

"We went to the cemetery and into some abandoned mausoleum. In it were So. Many. Bones. I grabbed a femur cause I was a 15-year-old who loved biology. I took it. That wasn’t cool."

- cowsmilk1994

What in the Pink Floyd...

"I Googled my estranged father's name and found out he died of an overdose, and they turned his cremains into a brick for a homeless memorial wall."

- Planet_Ziltoidia

Not a Smart Google Search

"I once Googled Jeffrey Dahmer's apartment. I wanted to see his furniture and stuff. That is NOT what I saw..."

- Efficient-Regular-96

Emergency Medical Technician Troubles

"I work as an EMT, a young EMT so obviously, I’m curious when someone says someone is dead."

"If you are a new EMT, don’t be curious; there isn’t anything good to see just major trauma."

- Individual-Estate758

Accidental Pepper Spray

"I thought this cool lighter was on a keychain, so I pressed the button. Turns out that cool lighter was pepper spray."

- copsdoesntstarttill4

The Horrors of Fire

"From the news: 'The Station nightclub fire occurred on the evening of February 20, 2003, at The Station, a nightclub and hard rock music venue in West Warwick, Rhode Island, United States, killing 100 people and injuring 230.' During a concert by the rock band Great White, a pyrotechnic display ignited flammable acoustic foam in the walls and ceilings surrounding the stage. Within six minutes, the entire building was engulfed in flames.'"

"There is a video shot by a cameraman from a local news outlet showing the start of the fire and approximately 13 minutes of heartbreak as the fire completely engulfed the building. As he circled the building he tried to open doors and call out to let people know that there was a way out, but the smoke was incredibly thick, and all you heard was screaming."

"The part that haunts me the most was the double doors at the front of the building, where people trying to escape were piled like wood in the doorway- one on top of another - people trying to free them couldn’t and eventually had to back off because of the fire. The video ends with the cameraman breaking down as emergency services finally arrived."

- Hot-Bandicoot8066

The Power of Electricity

"As a kid, I knew that you needed two wires for electricity to power an appliance. So I thought it would be a cool idea to let the electricity flow freely from one hole of a power outlet to the other, so I bent a wire in a U-shape and plugged it in."

"With my bare hands. At school, I believe in first grade. 220 Volt network. There was a flash, and I got thrown back, but thought nothing of it until some teachers came running and I got a lecture or two about safety."

- zedman_forever

A Recurring Mistake

"I found a memory card at work (retail). It sat on our desk for over two weeks. One day curiosity won and I stuck it in my phone."

"Memes, pics of family, and old man and old lady intimate parts."

"Then Google surprised me a few years later because it had uploaded them to my Google Drive."

- Itchy_Amphibian3883

Too Close to Home

"Finding out exactly where my dad died. He died in a car accident but I was never sure quite where it happened. I stupidly looked it up and found out it was right by where I lived and even drove past that exact spot plenty of times."

"Yeah, needless to say that did me way more psychological harm than good. I couldn’t handle it. Avoid that area at all costs. My husband got a job out of state and I was happy to move there just so I couldn’t be traumatized by living by that spot anymore."

- ZestyCloseTomato555

All Equal Deaths

"I killed a Rollie pollie when I was little and I still feel terrible about it."

- DoomSayerNih

Fair Enough

"Opening this thread and reading is officially at the top."

- Special_Lemon1487

Most of these entries were absolutely mortifying, and they remind us to be careful about what we're getting ourselves into, even if we're curious.

Otherwise, it can lead to terrible injuries if not terrible memories, which might even be worse, because they're so impossible to forget.

Man enjoying sangria solo
Sangria Señorial/Unsplash

When the cat's away, the mice will play.

That scenario could apply to many situations, but it generally refers to an individual enjoying temporary freedom to do as they please in the absence of a foe or constant companion.

In romantic couplings, this may involve a spouse or significant other finally engaging in private activity that could be frowned upon in the presence of the other person.

Curious to hear examples, Redditor shaka_sulu asked:

"Married folks, what's a non-sexual thing you look forward doing at home only when your spouse is away?"

Some people are happy to take up extra space.

Spacious Parking

"Parking my car in the middle of the garage."

– starkpaella

"Genius answer. It always brings joy."

– Heynicejobtoday

Hush

"The quiet. My husband constantly has the TV on, even if he’s not watching, and I enjoy silence."

– 2workigo

"This. My wife lived alone for many years and always has the TV on, even uses the one in the bedroom as noise to fall asleep to. The first thing I do when she’s gone is make sure all the noisemakers are shut off around the house. Well, except the cats. They don’t have off buttons."

– jaybeeg

Bed Positions

"Sleeping on the diagonal."

– snogweasel

"When you're there, I sleep lengthwise And when you're gone I sleep diagonal in my bed."

– downvotingprofile

Quiet Viewing

"I had a day off work today. Husband was at work, kids at school, so after I did the school run I came home, wrapped myself in our softest heated blanket, lay on the sofa and watched 3 movies with no interruptions. It was bliss."

– PheonixKernow

These Redditors can finally revel in their respective indulgences when they finally have the place to themselves.

Taste In The Finer Things

"The wife is a picky eater. When she is away, I either make a meal that she doesn’t like or I go to a restaurant that she doesn’t care for."

"It’s the little things. 😂"

– aizzo4

All Mine

"I cook almost all the meals. Almost being that we occasionally get take out. When I have a day off and my husband is working and my kids are at school/daycare, I go get breakfast and Waffle House. By myself. I sit there and eat a waffle, two scrambled eggs and bacon and I DONT HAVE TO F'KING SHARE! My husband despises Waffle House, but f'k I love those waffles. My parents used to have a waffle iron that made the traditional style waffles with the tiny squares until the cord shorted out. I miss them."

– missag_2490

Cheers

"My wife is in recovery, six years sober, and I support her in every way possible including, obviously, no alcohol in the house. If she’s away for a few days, I’ll grill me some steak tacos and wash them down with a really good Cabernet."

– Tom__mm

"I’m a recovering addict and I think you’re a great husband."

– JLHuston

Screen Time

"Watching TV shows he'd never watch, on the big TV."

– sexrockandroll

"There isn't an ancient aliens, shows from the early 80s (chuck Norris and Jack klugman), or horror movies that he won't watch - pausing every 3 seconds in case I miss something - that WE have to watch. When he travels for work I relish the quiet. Even the weather channel is enjoyable."

"My love for my husband has no end but he has the stupidest taste in shows yet whines if I would rather deep clean the basement than deal with any of it."

"But I can only deep clean the basement so many times..."

– Big-Mine9790

To each his/her/their own.

The Organizer

"Deep cleaning and reorganizing. I know, I'm a real party."

– Dependent_Top_4425

"You are my people. The garage door is hardly down before I'm getting busy!"

"There is not one thing better in this whole world than having some alone time in my spotless house."

– Individual-Army811

Everything But The Kitchen Sink

"Hike all day, get the sh**ty chinese takeout that she hates and I love despite knowing full well it’s objectively not good, and drink some nice beer while watching movies all night."

– holographoc

Establishing Order

"Putting things down and having them still be there when I want them."

"Having a clean house that stays that way for more than 30 seconds. I love him, but he's just a whirlwind of plates and seltzer cans some days."

– Lyeta1_1

When my husband's away, I watch all the horror films that have been stacking up in the queues of my streaming platforms.

He has a weak stomach for gore and violence, so we often avoid home invasion movies or slasher flicks and instead stick to comedy, drama, or dramedies, and documentaries.

Which is all well and good.

But when I have the place all to myself, I bust out the wine and Doritos and watch the latest Halloween or Scream movies I've been missing out on.