We all have cringeworthy memories that keep us up at night, things that make our faces sweat at 3 a.m. with the awful realization that yes, you did do that.
Today's burning question from Redditor skrt99: "What cringe thing that you did in your lifetime keeps you up at night?"
Some of you might find you're in good company.
"It was my first day in high school..."
It was my first day in high school and we were supposed to introduce ourselves through a skit, well I introduced myself like I was a WWE wrestler, complete with my own "ring-entrance walk", chants that I thought were supposed to hype up my new classmates and even had a made up wrestler nickname LMAO
I still wake up sweating every now and then remembering that.
"Lie about stupid things..."
Lie about stupid things like how rich my parents were, places we'd travelled to, etc (I grew up dirt poor with struggling parents).
"I once passed..."
I once passed what might've been the most disgusting sounding fart of all time, in front of a 100+ person class while giving a presentation. To try to cover it up, I said "well, excuse you, professor."
My friends still haven't let me live that one down.
"We both just sat in silence."
My crush came to my house to do a high school project. It involved the Internet and while she sat next to me she tried to navigate to Google on my computer. Unfortunately, the address bar auto-filled and took her to my last Google search... page two of results for her name. Every link had been clicked. We both just sat in silence.
"Asked my crush out..."
Asked my crush out, she said "omg ew what the f*ck" and ran away. Her friends nearby looked like they had witnessed a murder.
I am still haunted by this.
"In an attempt to be less awkward..."
Giphy
In an attempt to be less awkward I'm trying to take more time to think before I speak.
This backfired in a big way in December.
I ran into a cousin who I hadn't seen for a few years. He said hello and I was trying to think of a greeting since it was just about Christmas. I thought I would say seasons greetings or something but then I realized that might be a bit lame.
So while I'm internalizing this in my head I'm basically just staring at the guy. Who is probably thinking I don't recognize him so now I begin to panic. Now I will need to include his name in this greeting so he doesn't think I'm rude.
It's been a long time, I still haven't said anything. It feels like the most time ever since anyone has ever talked.
So in my head I'm like okay SAY SOMETHING. Anything has got to be better than this.
But in my panic all words leave my brain and what comes out is....
"CONGRATULATIONS..... Joshua"
"I was very shy growing up..."
I was very shy growing up and had trouble carrying a conversation. Writing was a strength, though, so I decided to hand write a note to the girl I had a crush on and put it in her locker (cringe by itself).
To my surprise, she came up and started talking to me the next day after school. I had imagined her most likely ignoring my letter or if anything writing back. I was so extremely flustered all I could focus on was her smile and the heat of my full-face blush.
She finished what she had to say and walked away.
Then, to my horror, I realized I had no idea what she said.
"I was still inexperienced..."
I was still inexperienced with my GF at the time and thought it would be spontaneous and hot to pick her up off the bed and kiss her with her legs wrapped me standing up.
However, she had no idea I was intending to do this so I struggled to lift her dead weight for a few agonising seconds. Then I thought "f-- this" and used all my strength to lift her up but I overdid it causing her to hit her head on the ceiling light, I drop her out of shock and she hits her head on the end of the bed.
She was completely okay and we laughed about it but I was so embarrassed.
"Every now and again..."
Every now and again I go back to my very first almost sexual encounter with a girl. She's got her hand on my thigh, she's running a finger over my pants, she just told me I have really pretty eyes. Now would probably be a pretty good time to kiss her. Nah, I decided I needed to return the compliment, but I couldn't think of anything, so I blurted out that she was a butterface. Two things: she was NOT a butterface, and she didn't know what a butterface was. She asked me. I explained it to her. I remained a virgin for six more years.
"I made the mistake..."
I made the mistake in middle school to wear white jeans to school. Everyone of my "friends" kept laughing and whispering behind my back the entire day. It wasn't until my last class a girl I sat with was kind enough to tell me I had period blood on my pants, and gave me her hoodie to tie around my waist. I had given presentations in 3 classes that day so everyone in my classes knew I was on my period. Luckily it was a lighter flow day and it wasn't like a murder scene. Mom let me stay home from school for the remainder of my period and I lost all my friends in the process because they were assh*les.
But now I'm best friends with the girl who gave me her hoodie so I've got that going for me.
"When I was a teenager..."
When I was a teenager I had a little crush on one of my female friends.
One day she starts hitting on me and suggestively nibbles and sucks on my finger. I get all nervous and jokingly say "Hey you don't know where that finger's been!"
I wake up some nights in a cold sweat remembering the look on her face at that moment.
"I lied to my counselors..."
Giphy
I lied to my counselors about getting into a certain pre-med program that apparently was a MUCH bigger deal than I thought it was right before leaving for college... I had gotten into A premed program but when asked on the spot I couldn't recall and I just agreed to whatever name was thrown out for it. They got super excited and congratulated me and I assumed that would be the end of it.
Well... They made a huge announcement the next day over the PA system of the School congratulating me and even gave me a certificate and took pictures shaking my hand... teachers were congratulating me all day and I even started getting special treatment.
I'm sure they eventually found our after I left the and I've been to embarrassed to even visit my old high school...
"I had a massive inappropriate crush..."
I had a massive inappropriate crush on my married math teacher in middle school. The poor man was clearly not at all endeared by it. Puberty was very cruel to me and I was not cute.
On the last day of school, I was too shy to approach him to sign my yearbook, so I had my friends do it. He signed it and suddenly that's when I worked up the courage to go ask him myself.
He awkwardly signed it a second time and didn't say a word to me.
"It all started..."
I accidentally started a cult in high school.
It all started with my group of friends having some laughs. I started to joke about being a "family" and gave everyone weird family roles. Like you're the weird aunt, and you're the grandma, etc. But then there was one weird chick who started taking it super seriously and wrote down everyone's "roles".
Then she started adding tons of people and even started doing strange rituals to initiate people into the "family". At that point I bailed.
They ended up vandalizing property, threatening students and teachers, sent out death threats, etc. The police actually started watching them as a serious gang threat.
All because of some f*ckin joke i made.
"My first party..."
I went to my first party with alcohol and I was flirting with this random girl, she gave me drink after drink until I was feeling pretty bad.
We ended up kissing. I threw up on her face.
But we should also be prepared and ready to ask the right questions to have a leg up on the competition.
"What is THE best question to ask on a job interview?"
A company's history or information about a past employee were suggested subjects appropriate for questioning.
Prior Knowledge
"When you were interviewing here, what would you have liked to know before you joined?"
"This worked for me. I asked my interviewer a question about how she had personally dealt with a company policy she had just explained. She bragged about her stellar adherence to the policy. I nodded my approval. I got the job."
A Previous Employee
"One that has always gone over well for me:"
"What were some qualities that the previous employee in this role brought to the job that you would like to see carried forward?"
"Another good thing to do is research the company you are interviewing with and you can ask things about what they may be involved in or you could drop that while reading about the company, you wondered this."
Hypothetical questions were suggested as helpful examples of inquiry.
Indicators Of How Companies Treat Employees
"A question that landed me a job once was: 'If I asked your direct reports about your management style, what do you think they'd tell me?' Stumped a hiring manager and he emailed me personally to tell me about it, no one ever asked him that question but got the job.
"In my current interviews I'm asking 'what did your company do for its employees during [the virus] to improve their day to day, work life balance, etc.' and I ask 'Is there anything your company adopted during [the virus] that they plan to keep post [the virus]?"
"These questions give a lot of insight into whether a company treated their employees well."
Past Performance & Adjustments
"If we were currently sitting in my 1 year review, what would I have done in this year for you to say I excelled in my role?"
"If I could snap my finger right now and change anything about your job or the company, what would it be and why?"
The following questions about a prospective company may not be answered from initial digging on their website.
Measure Of Success & Career Trajectories
"How is success measured in this role?"
"What are some possible career trajectories within the company that could stem from this position?"
Being A Solution
"Ask them what is the biggest problem you can solve for them in your first six months with the company. Similar to 'don't think of a purple hippo,' this forces them to imagine you succeeding in the position."
Simply The Best
"Who is your best employee and why is he/she the best?"
"You will then face 2 situations mostly:"
"panicking CEO who can't answer you 'Bob who works 17 hours a day for a slice of bread' so the fear in their faces must be a big nono for you"
"entusiast CEO who actually follow their business and can tell you who is an added value for the company and why."
– ThePiz91
My experiences with job interviews are different than others seeking work in office environments.
Having had a years-long career as a dancer, my "interview" was the dance audition, where hopefuls dance in small groups of people at a time after learning a routine and then awaiting their fate after the panel evaluates their performances.
The question I may or may not have asked in such a scenario earlier in my career was: "Did I make the cut?"
I did not make the cut. And I learned never to ask that again.
I remember the worst date I ever had. My biggest regret is that I stayed for the entire thing. I should've left as soon as I realized this was not going well, which was basically at hello. But he was paying so I drank, a lot. I'll keep names and dates to myself to protect the innocent.
0/10
Big Brother Reaction GIF by Big Brother After DarkGiphy"Went to brewery, date said I had hairy arms and that meant I was horny, said "you look really awful in this light" and then tried to dig out of that hole by saying in his native language that was a term of endearment long term couples said to each other. 0/10 did not date again."
Lucky 13?
"My wife wanted to plan our 13th wedding anniversary. I was excited because usually, I plan it. She bought us some new disc golf discs and after a quick supper, we went to play. We hadn't played in forever. We were laughing and I had a great time. She served me with divorce papers and told me that the date was a test to see if she still had feelings for me. I also learned that she was having an affair that started well before our anniversary."
- rmorlock
Two Hours from Home
"Not necessarily a date but a person I was dating invited me to his parent's house for the afternoon. He wanted to introduce me to them and show me the house he grew up in. I thought it was super sweet and had no problems going. He was also in the middle of moving and needed to pick up a few things, so it really didn't seem that unusual."
"Yeah, we got there and it was awful. His entire family was there. They traveled from hours away too. This was not just meeting the parents, it was meeting the ENTIRE family. Even worse? At some point, this idiot told his parents that he had proposed. We had been dating TWO months. I spent the entire afternoon dumbfounded and just playing along."
"We were two hours from home and I had no cell service, no way to leave at all. We ended up spending the afternoon brainstorming wedding ideas and planning an Alaskan honeymoon that his parents planned to gift us. His brother even called to say congratulations! We drove back to his apartment in silence. When we got there, I got in my car and left, didn't even bother grabbing my stuff. Weirdest experience ever. I have no idea how he broke it to his parents that we weren't getting married."
You're Cut Off!
"Got set up on a blind date once between mutual friends. She shows up to the restaurant already a little tipsy, orders multiple appetizers and only takes like one or two bites from each one. Then she proceeds to order 3 or 4 more drinks and is visibly drunk at this point. She gets up and says she's going to the bathroom and staggers off. About 15-20 minutes go by so I try to call her several times but no answer."
"Finally I decide to pay the check and just leave. About 2 hours later I'm sitting at home and I get a call from an unknown number. It's the police department. She was picked up on a DUI on her way home after she ditched me and gave the cops my number to see if I could go bail her out!"
- mox44ah
Sorry?
Bbc Three Idk GIF by BBCGiphy"Well, I gave this answer on a different topic, but it ties in with this. We were out on a date, we had been seeing each other for a while, close to a year maybe. She gets a phone call. Suddenly she looks destroyed. Her fiancé had just died in a motorcycle accident."
What in the world? I mean how can we ever expect to pair off with the dating pool being inundated with liars and nut jobs? I'm going to delete my apps.
Girl, Bye.
Sassy Beyonce GIFGiphy"Had a girl openly flirt with the bartender in front of me. She says she wasn't. But handing him her own phone and asking for his contact info in front of her date seems like it to me."
Crazy!
"Came out from a movie, late at night, and date's Camaro was stolen. Apparently, he called his WIFE (that I did not know he had) and let her know where he was and what happened. She showed up and realized he was on a date! She started chasing ME around the parking lot telling me she was going to kill me. Saved by the cops who showed up just in time to take the auto theft report."
Hey Mom
"Met a girl at a country bar one night in my 20s. We were both pretty drunk but hit it off pretty good. Ended up getting her number and we agreed we'd go on a real date. Fast forward to the date, she gets in my vehicle and... she looks almost identical to my mom. I was mortified. I was polite and we went for lunch where I found out she also had a boyfriend she "wasn't sure if she was into". Never talked to her again."
- SgtGo
Liars...
"When I was in college many years ago, before the advancement of cell phones and social media, I was chatting with a girl I met on a BBS who lived on Long Island, NY. I was 18 at the time, but lied and said I was 22 because she said she was 25. We spent a few weeks emailing each other, as well as calling each other."
"We even exchanged pics. When we finally met up, things blew up. Turns out we both lied about our ages: She was really 33, and lied because she thought she looked younger. She admitted she sent a college photo to me. We still had dinner together, but it was awkward as hell. We never spoke again."
Doubles
Kill Me Now Season 1 GIF by FriendsGiphy"It was a double date. She was more interested talking to the other girl throughout the whole thing. Found out later from the other guy that his girl cheated on him with my date."
Ummm... I think I'm just going to stay single. That is a handful of crazy. Why can't people just be honest? I swear the search for love warps people's brains. Be careful out there people.
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