Love is a beautiful thing. it is a core gift of life. To be able to find that one in a million person to spend this life and eternity with is something we all dream about. One of the worst feelings in the world involving love is not having the love you feel reciprocated. And hey... we've all been there. Thank God for vodka and good friends.... and Adele.
One Reddit asked everyone to be brave and share... People who are in love with someone you can't possibly be with, how do you cope?
Start with the obvious.Giphy
Keep yourself busy and try and move on.
This. I went through a breakup earlier this year and this works. When I would start to think about him I redirected myself to something else. Pick up my phone and play a game. Put an audiobook on and concentrate on it. If a song came on and it made me think of him I changed the song. Essentially I avoided thinking about him as much as possible but at the same time acknowledge its ok to feel sad. I just tried like hell to make it a point to dwell too long.
Make sure to plan things to not be reminded of her. Don't look her up etc. And find things to occupy your time that involve other people, maybe a new hobby. It's always easier once you start enjoying others company.
Just general advice, if you've done that stuff then good luck my man. (Or woman).
By being a workaholic with no personal life.
It's you not me!
Convince myself that the person I thought they were never existed, and face the reality that they are not a good person. It's true in my case but hard to accept.
They'll never change...
My ex. She seems to become a better person every single day. I cope by... I dunno yet. The ship has completely sailed on that one. I just try to be a good father to our daughter and a great co-parent.
I cut her out of my life completely. It's not healthy for me to be around her.
Agreed. One of my exes reached out to me when my fiancé and me broke up, and my heart just about exploded. But she's married and has kids and I'm not a home-wrecker. At least not a wrecker of other people's homes.
I've been in love with my best friend for years. We went on a few dates when we first met, had the "conversation" about what our relationship was, and mutually decided to be friends. I've seen him date other girls and I've dated other guys, but we've remained intimately close over the last four years and I found myself comparing every conversation with any other guy to my conversations with him. About two years ago, he moved across the country and we've continued our relationship as friends long distant. We talked via FaceTime for hours every couple weeks.
I finally broke down a few months ago and just laid it all out. I told him that I wanted to know how he felt about me because I was ready to start something with him. I finally told him that I have loved him and wanted to be with him because we can talk about everything and spend days together without getting sick of each other and I feel like there's not much else in this world that you need in a relationship than a person who has your back and you have theirs. Again, he told me he was flattered but wanted to date other people and keep our friendship the same. I told him I couldn't do it anymore and we left it at that. I stopped calling and texting for about a month and he gave me that space but somehow, putting us on pause was more painful to me than a clean break in a relationship...I knew it was the right thing to do, but I found it incredibly difficult and lonely.
We finally revisited the conversation where I was the most open, honest and in control of my emotions than I've ever been with another person. I told him that I loved him, but deserved someone who loved me the same way back. He agreed and told me that he cared for me and if I wasn't in his life, it would be really hard for him and when we hung up...I realized that I had never felt more empowered. I'm a little behind on the times of dating and being in a relationship...but I've never told someone exactly what I wanted, in the exact way I wanted to say it. It was liberating and has helped me at least come to terms with the fact that I've done everything I can and deserve to be loved. We are still friends, but I'm at least in a place where I am in control of how I feel about him.
I don't think I can truly answer this question honestly because I'm not sure I would recommend keeping the relationship open with that person as a healthy way to cope. But because he does mean a lot to me and we have been there for each other through some really messed up times, being honest and straightforward after years of just hoping things would change made me overcome feelings I thought I never could and has at least opened up the possibility of another person occupying that space.
You're dead to me! Thank God.Giphy
In business, there is a term called "managing expectations."
I get asked by a lot of people how to deal with this or that heartbreak, and I always say, "cut off all contact, and expect that the feelings will continue for about five years afterwards."
We don't know that we expect to get over past loves quickly, but because we are an optimistic species, we subconsciously do. By setting the expectations to something more realistic, it can at least make the process easier.
"What makes someone bad in bed?"
WHERE TO BEGIN?!
The list is endless.
Half the time all it takes to be better is a little effort.
"What makes someone bad in bed?"
I love sex. But it can be stressful. I've always found connection to be one of the best lessons.
CommunicationsGIF by HULUGiphy
Take it Slow
"No foreplay and not caring if your partner is enjoying it."
"Proposing mid intercourse."
Talk to Me
"Friction isn’t always a good thing."
YuckBored Larry Bird GIF by SB NationGiphy
"To this you can add unclipped fingernails."
"And dirty fingernails. Nah, ma'am. I’m betting this is not worth the infection. Thanks."
‘good at sex’
FlavorsAmanda Seales Wow GIF by truTVGiphy
Sex. Let's be better at it.
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Love is so elusive these days isn't it?
Who knows what anyone is looking for in the relationship department anymore.
It's all too exhausting.
But people we keep trying.
"Why are you single right now?"
I'm single because I've given up. And I'm good. For now.
PeaceSnoop Dogg Reaction GIFGiphy
"I put absolutely no effort into meeting someone."
"Hard to meet people when you are a hermit."
"I have too many unsolved issues, i can't in good conscience bring someone else into them."
truthCaptain America Lol GIF by mtvGiphy
"Supply chain issue."
"Best answer here."
That's funny. But it feels oddly true.
Ahhh...Think Winnie The Pooh GIFGiphy
"I'm attracted to many, and unattractive to all."
Bad LoopSeth Meyers Whatever GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"Because my relationships end before they even begin."
"This is my story right here."
Alright. Now that we've laid out all the excuses, let's get to matching with some people.
There is no bigger mystery than what happens to us after we die.
"If heaven exists, what’s the first thing you’d do?"
Overcome with joy
"In all reality?"
"If Heaven exists, like 50% of the awesomeness is just the very fact that it exists."heaven gate GIF by South Park Giphy
A re-match long in the making
"Ask my childhood friend Kevon for a race."
"He used to beat me handily when were younger (9-13) and he’d always brag."
"When I got older and faster I moved away so I was never able to race him again."
"I wanna race him both in our prime."- Abethegreat1
Reunite with loved ones
"Find my husband, give him a huge hug and never let go again."
"Live our forever together."
"I f*cking love him and miss him so much."- jessdfrench
"Embrace my sweet wife and tell her how proud I am of the kids."- RifleShower
"Try to find my brother."
"Man, I miss him."
"He died in 2020 at age 34."- grummlinds1
"Give my mum and dad a big hug."- goonerjack007Miss U GIF by GIPHY Studios OriginalsGiphy
Achieve the "firsts" we never got to do
"Find my son and have a beer with him."
"Something we never got to do in real life."- tanukis_parachute
Hone new skills
"Try to play Smoke on the water on my harp."- Ashtar-the-Squid
The joy of doing nothing
"Rest."- BanzaikoowaidCare Free Black Girls GIF by AuroraDrawsGiphy
Live on without pain
"Enjoy my healthy back without pain."- Knackbein_
Who knows what's in store for us after our lives come to an end.
But the first word in that term can be misleading.
Indeed, some "fun facts" reveal information that isn't remotely "fun" in the slightes.
What's a 'fun fact' that isn’t fun at all?"
Ironically, something you likely don't think about...
"Your brain blocks you from feeling your organs moving around inside you."- Aydengeist06
Try watching Finding Nemonow...
"Only one in a thousand sea turtles born actually make it to adulthood."- Sebs_123
Shocking new light on an age old classic
"In the books, Stuart Little was never explicitly called a mouse."
"He's pretty much described as a deformed mouse-esque person born form human parents."- Red_Beard47stuart little mouse GIF by VIASAT3Giphy
Nature running it's course...
"There's a bird that feeds its younger offspring to the eldest."- Teacup_Cult
I have no allergies... yet
"Not very fun."- smallemochick
Those poor, innocent creatures.
They'd still be here if they weren't so delicious...
"Giant tortoise meat was supposedly better tasting than chicken."
"It's fat tasted better spread on bread than butter."
"Not to mention, because they evolved without humans, they were easy to hunt."
"You could tie one to your back, and roll another to the ship and they would just let you."
"Conversely, the dodo, while as easily captured by sailors, tasted awful."
"It was completely unpalatable."
Don't forget the nose plugs
"Antarctica smells like penguin poop."
"Antarctica is a desert, it is too cold for bacteria to live."
"Nothing there to clean up penguin droppings."
"If you are close enough to see penguins, you will also smell them."- gummby8
Makes those long lines so worth it...
"The TSA missed 96% of contraband during an inspection in 2015."- omegasix321All Falls Down Tsa GIF by Kanye WestGiphy
Oh yeah, probably not....