Guys, I was an awkward kid. Shocking, I know. I was the kid who crushed way too hard and had no poker face about it. When I say I had no poker face I mean I made it weird with the constant staring, the swooning, etc. It was bad enough that the first (and only) song ever dedicated to me was a song telling the other person to go away.
Um ... ouch.
Yeah... so that's what happened when I caught by biggest crush. Reddit user SwiperNoSwiping42 asked
What was the biggest crush you had?
And yeah, some of these stories are just as awkward as mine. Some are heartbreaking. Overall, it's pretty clear that major crushes have huge impacts on people's lives... and awkwardness levels. I don't know where you are, Jason ... but my bad. I made it weird. 7th grade was intense.
A Golden Child
Oh man, this question breaks my heart. My biggest crush was a close family friend all through junior high and high school. He was a golden child. Good looking, charismatic, very intelligent (ended up getting a doctorate), and good person to boot. He was way out of my social circle and never interested in me, but he was always kind and considerate, when others weren't. Our families were out at the lake once, and I got stuck on a raft fair enough away from shore I didn't think I could make it back in as I was a weak swimmer, and was nearly in tears. He swam back with me, encouraging me all the way and helping me find the shallows where I could wade back.
He died of brain cancer when we were in our 30's. It just kills me to think about it.
Still Gives Me Butterflies
Giphy
My husband. We first met when we were about 15 and liked each other a lot but he moved away before we could ever act on it. Over the years I would run into him occasionally when he came to visit friends in the city. It was always electric, and I was SO into him, but I was too shy to make a move.
Finally, eleven years after we first met I found him on Facebook, we started talking and fell in love. We've been together almost ten years now, have two kids together and he still gives me butterflies.
It Literally Hurt
I had a crush on a girl for two years from when I was 11-12 and never acted on it (because i was a kid) it was a very strange two years. I haven't had a crush in over 6 years and that crush was easily the strongest. I remember it literally hurting because I liked her that much. Kid me was weird.
Not Me
Does a crush entirely made up of memories of the past count?
In third grade, I had a crush on a girl in my class. We had a great time playing soccer at recess every day, we even held hands once! Then after that year I moved away, but I never forgot, and the crush probably grew even bigger over the years.
Long story short, I found her on Facebook, and sent her a message. She did not remember me at all. Even remembered the class and the school, but not me. So yeah, there was that.
Win Win
I had a crush on a girl that I was friends with for about a year when I was 15 but I didn't say anything. Turns out she was gay and we became really close friends and I didn't have to say anything. So win win!
Crushing Pretty Hard
I've had a few crushes in my teens, but right now at 28 I'm crushing pretty hard on this new girl at the office. She's gorgeous and kind and sweet and funny and outgoing and always has time to talk to me. Her smile lights up the room, and when she laughs at one of my jokes I feel lighter than air.
Even if she wasn't way out of my league (which she is), she has a boyfriend who she loves very much, and I'm a big believer in love so I'd never get in the way of it. Sometimes it hurts, but I'm mostly just happy to have her as a friend and I'm happy that she's in a loving relationship
Life As A Preteen
I'm in the midst of one right now. I haven't had a full-on "crush" since 5th grade. It's oddly thrilling and disturbing as an adult. The maddening omnipresence of his smile in my head is no different than life as a preteen.
- rkgk13
Trophy Of Shame
Giphy
I'm crushing pretty hard right now. I'm 31 and IT at a medical school. She is a 24 year old dental student. When she smiles her eyes turn into little moons. Her eyes sparkle. I don't know if they naturally sparkle for everybody or only towards me (god i hope!), but they sparkle. I bought a tooth plushie for her for Christmas with a cheese ass note that says something like you're the reason smiles are merry and white. It's so cheesy I don't even want to read it again. I never gave it to her and it still sits on my desk right here. It is my trophy of shame. A reminder to not be a fool. I don't need to be harassing and distracting hard working students.
That Ending, Though...
In junior high I had a huge crush on this one blonde girl who I'll call Liz. She had just transferred to the school in seventh grade and was one of a handful of new girls that year (it was a relatively small, co-ed private school).
Pretty much every class had assigned seating, determined by the teachers. We had a few classes together and just so happened to have our assigned seats right next to each other in those classes, so we'd either be sitting across from each other or right in front of/behind each other. We got along great and occasionally got called out by teachers for talking/joking/laughing in the middle of class. This was back when AIM was all the rage in the early 2000s, so we'd often chat in the evenings because we liked a lot of the same bands, etc.
Never really confessed my crush to her that first year. The next year, eighth grade, I got a big boost of confidence when another lady friend I often goofed around with in class spontaneously told me, "you got really hot over the summer," and started asking me if I was into one of a few girls she listed off, indicating they thought I was cute and they were interested. Unfortunately, that list didn't include Liz.
Still, I "dated" some other girls (as much as a 13-14 year old "dates") from other schools in the area and I guess about halfway through the year I finally told Liz that I had a crush on her. She hadn't dated anyone in the entire time I had known her, so I thought hey, maybe I have a shot.
Unfortunately, the feeling wasn't mutual. I was pretty disappointed, but we remained good friends and nothing about our friendship ended up changing. We still talked a lot and would sometimes be the class clowns on a given day, which often ended with our teachers separating us in the classroom. One instance that got me kicked out of class was when we were passing notes back and forth to each other (she was sitting at the desk behind me) with stupid/silly shit on them with the sole purpose of annoying our teacher, who was a middle-aged woman. At one point the teacher calls me out for handing the note but doesn't say anything about Liz. After a couple minutes when the teacher turned her back, Liz hands me a note that says something like, "Why is she singling you out? Am I invisible?" And I handed a note back to her that said, "I think she's into me. You got some competition."
Of course, right when I handed that note to Liz and right as she was reading it, the teacher called me out again, walked over to Liz, grabbed the note and was about to do the usual thing where the teacher reads it aloud to the class to embarrass the guilty students and put a stop to it. Knowing what the note said, though, Liz immediately started bursting out laughing, the teacher stopped herself from reading it and then sent me to the principal's office.
After junior high, Liz ended up going to an all-girls high school and we pretty much fell out of contact about halfway through freshman year. Even though I did all the usual high school social events, like football games and dances and stuff, I never saw her at any of them. I dated quite a few girls over the course of my high school years, lost my virginity, etc.
Fast forward to my senior year. I go to a football game with a group of my friends and end up running into her randomly. We immediately get so distracted talking and catching up that we don't realize our groups of friends had left us and moved on somewhere else. We exchange numbers and agree to hang out some time soon and went our separate ways for the evening. At the time, I honestly wasn't actively hoping we'd date or hook up. I mean, I was certainly fond of the idea, but truthfully I was just kind of happy to reconnect with a friend I hadn't seen or spoken to in so long.
The next week, we agree to hang out and go to the football game that weekend and then to the inevitable party afterwards at whoever's house it'd be that night. Only problem is, she didn't have a car yet so I told her it'd be no problem and I'd pick her up.
I picked her up and we drove to the game but ended up spending most of the time kind of on our own in the much less crowded areas just talking and laughing. We weren't into the game at all so I suggested we just go to my car and wait for everyone to leave and then drive to the party. As soon as we leave and round a corner completely out of sight from everyone, she pulls on my jacket and starts making out with me.
I was honestly surprised but was obviously quite happy with it. She smiled and laughed shyly after the kiss and I said something like, "13 and 14 year old me would've done anything to kiss you like that when we were in junior high." She thought that was cute and said she had no idea why she turned me down back then. We got to my car and she said she wasn't really interested in going to the party, so I suggested we go to a nearby park and hang out, just the two of us.
We had sex that night. Easily one of the happiest and most fun evenings I've ever had, even to this day, given the context and history between us. We never dated but eh, I was just happy something came of it.
- TheWaker
Tough School Year
My eighth grade English teacher. Raging teenage hormones and a hot teacher made for a very tough school year.
Oasis in the desert? No thank you.
"Dubai."
"Why and whats special about it?"
"Its a modern city in a desert."- Maximum_Calendar_791.
"Dubai."
"A fake city with fake people, no human rights, where the world's tallest buildings hide corruption and slavery in their shadows."
"It's like someone decided to take every problem of mankind and concentrate it in one spot."- PayNoNoticeOfMe.
"Dubai one i think it is ugly two I would die in two minutes of me being there I can't stand anything above 40 c°."- BookWormPerson.
One of the seven wonders is one too many for me.
"The pyramids. "
"Too many horror stories of Egypt."- Aemiom.
Landlocked.
"Not really a destination, but taking a cruise."- Shortbus_Playboy.
cruise ship vacation GIF by Hallmark ChannelGiphyMountains aren't really my thing.
"Everest."
"Just why."
"You use a bunch of money to get in there them come down."
"And trash your whole way there. It's literally a corner in the Earth insufferable for humans and we still made a way to go there to trash it."- ACLullaby.
It's in my own backyard... but still not interested.
"I have lived about 15km away from the Burj Khalifa ever since it was made."
"I could not care any less besides the occasional pointing out the 'shiny tall building' to my nieces.- legolosss.
The pictures are enough for me.
"Mount Rushmore."
"Friends who've made the journey to Mount Rushmore mostly say it was no big deal and not worth the effort or expense to travel there."- Back2Bach.
States Selfie GIF by Ethan BarnowskyGiphyHustle and Bustle? No thanks.
"Anything busy.'
"Whether it's cities, structures, I don't care."
"I'd rather go to a boring empty quiet place than a place full of people."- TheSmeep.
They're watching us.
"That creepy a** place in Japan with all the realistic dolls."
"No thank you."
dolly dearest horror GIF by absurdnoiseGiphySome dream of paying a visit to these places.
Others hope they never have to set foot there, and will choose to leave it to the other millions of tourists.
To each, their own.
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And while a candidate is fit to lead remains to be seen, we rely on our instinct to choose someone with whom we can relate.
But sometimes, our options are limited and we inevitably go with someone who is the lesser of two evils.
Curious to hear from strangers online about a hypothetical, Redditor Cashmeresquid2309 asked:
"Americans of Reddit, would you vote for an openly Atheist presidential candidate? Why or why not?"
Redditors were quick to point out the answer was a no-brainer.
We Already Know The Answer
"Asking Reddit if they'd vote for an atheist..."
"I feel like the answer would be obvious."
– sarahmagoo
Sci-Fi Analogy
"Americans of Reddit, would you vote for a Star Wars fan who heckin loves doggos?"
– WitnessChemical
For The Atheists In The Crowd
"Atheists of atheistville, would you vote for an open atheist?"
– nixcamic
Others weighed in with a range of opinions.
About 45
"What's funny is how many of them would probably say no, even though they voted for Trump and would do so again. Say whatever else you want about him, but I seriously can't understand how anyone could genuinely believe Trump is a Christian. He's so obviously faking it and is undoubtedly the most atheistic president we've ever had or are likely to have for a long time."
"This is a guy who's never even so much as read the Bible or attended church, who told a conservative radio host his favorite Bible verse was 'an eye for an eye', who told evangelical interviewers that he's never asked God for forgiveness because he's never done anything wrong, and who routinely commits all 7 deadly sins (pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony and sloth) without remorse."
– empfindsamkeit
From A Different Perspective
"Not an american but interestingly according to this survey on 1006 people from 2007, being atheist was the worst thing you could be as a candidate (of the things asked) with only 45 % of people saying they'd vote for one."
– ilovecatfish
An atheist candidate isn't necessarily a big strike.
Double Negative
"I wouldn’t not vote for someone just because they were atheist."
– HabitualEnthusiast
Credibility First
"This is it. If they’re running on platforms I support with a history to back up those campaign promises, I don’t care if they belong to the church of the flying spaghetti monster. They could literally be a member of the satanic temple and I, an actual practicing Christian, would give less shi*s than a constipated sloth."
"Edit: yes, I realize the Satanic Temple does not actually worship satan. I used it for that purpose. The Church of Satan has some…problematic views and I probably would not vote for someone who literally holds a platform of eugenics."
– Phoenix_of_Asclepius
Some view the role of religion in politics as important.
It Depends
"Religion can be relevant: I would have strong reservations about voting for a Scientologist, even if I agreed with the policies they proposed. I would have strong reservations voting for a member of an apocalyptic cult or, possibly worse, a follower of the (highly heretical) 'prosperity gospel,' which unfortunately includes more and more so-called 'evangelicals' — I didn't vote for George W. Bush, but it's not because he was an evangelical."
"It depends on the role: I'd probably be more flexible with a legislator than an executive (mayor, governor, president), as their character is IMO more important than for a legislator and their policy stances somewhat less important relative to a legislator."
"Satanic temple — well, that's just an organized group of atheists and humanists with an intentionally inflammatory choice of name. They're generally fine people."
– alyssasaccount
A Bad Rap
"The Satanic Temple is an excellent organization that every decent person should be able to respect. A Church of Satan member, not so much."
"There's a huge difference between them!"
– StarsEatArtBooks
And Redditor boganvegan said it best.
"Better an open atheist than a fake Christian."
It all boils down to trustworthiness. Without full transparency, how could anyone put their faith in a candidate who spews nothing but lies?
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I'm always freaked out when I'm home alone. Lights on. Yeah, my electric bill is high.
Dorothy?
Wind Conan Obrien GIF by Team CocoGiphy"I dreamed the front door blew open at the exact time the house alarm went off... I hopped up and sure enough, the front door was open. No intruder."
fatowl
I See You
"Not home alone but only one in right side of the house. Went to my mom's bathroom to wash my hands and saw a pair of feet behind the half open door. Laughed and said 'very funny Ma, I see you.' then finished up and left. Bumped into my mother in the kitchen unpacking, nobody else was in the house. I'm glad whatever was behind the door didn't peek out."
SatanWithFur
“It’s Doug!”
"One night I had forgotten to lock my apartment door and woke up in the middle of the night. My bedroom door was about 2 feet from my front door, as you walked into the apartment. First a big dog ran by, then a person. Holy crap I was so scared and I screeched 'Who is it?!?!!'"
"A man said 'It’s Doug!' As I was thinking to myself, who the f**k is Doug, he said 'oh, crap.' He turned around to go back out the front door saying 'Sorry.' I asked 'Didn’t you have a dog with you?' He said 'Oh, yeah. Hey, c’mon!.' He left, his dog ran out after him and I locked my front door."
"Edit: glad you all thought this was funny, because I did too, once my heart quit trying to beat right out of my chest! The next day the girls at work thought I was crazy for not being upset, but eh, done is done. Peace!"
scarletohairy
Confused...
"My sister and I were home alone and we heard someone big running up the stairs. The stairs make lots of noise with slight pressure so when there’s someone big on them you can tell. I went out of my room to check but saw no one anywhere and my sister also came out of her room and she asked if that was me I said no and we both looked around to see if there was anyone but found no one in the whole house. We were confused and called our parents and just waited until they got back and that was that."
JtSudbury04
I See You
Staring I See You GIF by QuikTripGiphy"I very clearly saw a guy walk into my room. But when I went after him there was nobody there. I checked in the closet, under my bed, everywhere one could hide in my room."
HighlyOffensive10
This is why home video surveillance is key.
"NO"
Season 5 No GIF by The OfficeGiphy"My parents were on a road trip, just left, and I sat down at my desk. I thought 'Weekend alone by myself' and a voice yelled into my right ear 'NO' so loud it hurt."
Th4ab
Wild
"I managed to lock myself out of my house on my birthday during a tornado while trying to bring my cats to the basement for safety. I later found out that the tornado was approximately a couple miles or less from me at that exact time. The sky was green and it got weirdly calm and then I could hear what sounded like a train coming before I found an unlocked window to climb through. Wild times."
SilverGnarwhal
Saturday morning in the 80s...
"I wasn't home alone but I was awake by myself one Saturday morning in the 80s when I was around 7 or so. I believe my mom was the only one home because my dad went to the lake to go fishing that weekend, and I'm not sure where my older brothers were, maybe they went with him, idk."
"Anyways, my mom's sleeping in, and I'm in the living room by myself, watching Saturday morning cartoons and making a fort out of sheets and cushions. Something made me turn around and I saw my dad in his pajamas standing in the hallway entrance with his hands on his hips, looking the mess I was making and shaking his head."
"He then turned around and walked into my room, which was just off the hallway entrance. Dude. I didn't even look, I just booked it to my parents room and woke my mom up. I don't remember what happened after that, this was around 35 years ago. And yes, my dad was fine, nothing had happened to him."
smriversong
Get the Bat...
"I was at home by myself on a call with some friends when all of a sudden my dog begins to bark like crazy, which was odd since it was the middle of the night and he's usually sleep. I go downstairs to check on him and find him barking at our hall closet, terrified I grabbed my bat that I keep in my room just in case and open the door. There was nothing out of usual at first at then I look down and notice a familiar looking object at the bottom of the closet."
"It was my mom's necklace she had lost when I was 9, (i'm 15 now just to put in perspective how long it's been). I showed it to my mom at breakfast and she was just as shocked as I was. I still have no clue how it got there or how my dog knew it was in there, definitely one of the oddest occurrences of my life."
SomeRandomIdiot14
Meow
Happy Cat GIF by ChubbiverseGiphy"Many years ago, I was 14 or so, my first night alone in the house when my parents were out. Lying on the living room floor reading, my cat sleeping next to me."
"Suddenly, cat wakes up, stares intently into the dark corner of the room behind me, hair on end, growls and then bolts out of the room and upstairs. I look behind me and see nothing, but follow cat upstairs and hide under the covers. Freaked me out."
LairdofWingHaven
Thank God for alarms. I hate being home alone.
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The body freaks me out. But it's all I've got. So teach me some things.
Minutes...
death GIFGiphy"The fastest killing virus takes around 4 days to kill you. That would be Ebola. Your immune system can kill you in 15 minutes."
will477
'locked-in'
"If your brainstem (the part of the brain that mediates most motor control for all of the body) is damaged, you can get 'locked-in' syndrome. That means you're fully conscious and aware of your surroundings but unable to move or speak. The only muscles that remain unaffected in most people are the muscles that move they eyes and the eyelids."
"You're essentially trapped within your own body with your only way of communication being blinking or moving your eyes It can be caused by toxins, blockage of the basilar artery which is the main artery of the brainstem, or other brainstem damage."
4oodler
Explosions
"Some people suffer from Exploding Head Syndrome, which causes them to hear a loud bang when they wake up."
ToraMix19
"When I was younger I believe I experienced this a few times. Sounds I heard were: about a million people talking and laughing all at once, a train that irl would've been about a foot away from me based on the volume of the sound, and a door slamming loudly."
aliaisacreature
Pain
"Not sure if this is by design, but I totaled my car once, almost completely uninjured somehow. Then I looked down to my right hand which I remember jabbing into my dashboard at 55mph. Luckily (unluckily?) only my pinky took the blow. But instead of a floppy-udder full of bone-sand, my pinky was 0.5 inches long."
"Broke no bones, but instead perfectly stacked my phalanges, or finger bones, INTO my hand. This is fixed by a muscular Russian murse grabbing your pinky with both hands and pulling very hard. God I wish they gave me more lidocaine."
TelevisionOlympics
Functions
animation art GIFGiphy"If you have a surgery where they need to move your organs around they might not function for a day as the body assumes that they are dead."
tonythebutcher13
Move things around? You mean that's not fake when it happens on "Grey's Anatomy?"
Basketball Wives Ugh GIF by VH1"The only reason you are not aware of it is because the ambient noise kind of drowns it out because your ears focus on it. If you go to one of those super-silent rooms that absorb all sorts of sounds, it is a really weird way to reacquaint yourself with your body."
Black_Handkerchief
The Mouth
"Idk about the most disturbing but how bad human teeth are. We’d think it’s our sugary and processed diets these days that cause it, but even Otzi the iceman discovered in Italy was found to have terrible teeth, mouth diseases and cavities. It’s odd that even with the most basic of diets our teeth are so bad."
Dorianisconfused
In the bowels...
"I noticed this after my abdominal surgery. When I turned over in bed my guts seemed to fall from one side to the other. Mentioned to my doc and she confirmed it was my bowels rearranging themselves."
squatter_
"Apparently the doctor just throws your intestines back in there higgeldy-piggeldy because there isn't a correct way to pack them neatly."
LostDesigner9
A Quick Burst
"There are a vast number of ways that your body can malfunction and kill you with little or no warning. An aneurysm can go undetected until it bursts and kills you. Getting hit in the chest just the right way can stop your heart. You can encounter an allergen that never previously provoked an immune response that freaks out your body so badly that you die. You literally just never know if your body will just... die."
Unsolicited_Spiders
The body is such a conundrum. Sexy and gross all at once.
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