What makes someone likable? A smile, the way they speak, how they treat others? What is the quality you notice first? The thing that stands out the most when meeting a new person for me isn't simply if they have good qualities but how natural it seems to be for them.

If they had to pause and think about it to make a big gesture out of doing something nice they probably aren't like that in their downtime. The people who volunteer and do good deeds without posting about it, telling everyone about it, and just go on like that's a normal part of this day--those are my people.

Recognition is great but the people who do good deeds in private, those people typically have good hearts.

One Redditor by the screen name CremlinGremlin wanted to know the good qualities in people that shine through the most. They asked:

What's something that makes a person instantly likeable?"

Be nice to the shy kid...

As a mini-introvert, I usually sit alone on a bench during school lunch, with friends sometimes joining me. Occasionally, someone would come to talk to me if I was alone, try to be friends. I hate it, but my respect for them grows immensely." MaskedNavajo

The way to the heart is through the stomach...

​“They brought me something tasty. My affection can be easily purchased with treats.” sosogos

I always do this! I've been told I'm a decent cook so how do I make new friends? Stuff their faces with food. Their stomachs? Full. New friend? Gained.” smolboi99

Comedy Central Eating GIF by Inside Amy Schumer Giphy

Seeing the beauty inside people...

​“I have a physical deformity and everyone I've ever met brings it up instantly or makes fun of it, except for my current best friend. She hasn't even mentioned it once and she is the nicest person ever. That is why she is my best friend.” Kiaser_Wilhelm_II

“People who get hung up on trivial details aren't worth your time and energy. There are enough good people out there like your best friend to fill up your life. Think of others' rudeness as a convenient filter, letting you quickly sift through the rubble to find true gold. Never settle for disrespect. Keep on, my friend.” High_Point_Genetics

When they like to celebrate you...

“The person who remembers birthdays and either calls or treats the birthday person to a meal is instantly the best person in any group of people. We should all strive to be that person.”

"Pro tip. Put those Facebook dates right in your calendar. Within a single year, you'll have marked every significant birthday. I'm typically the ‘birthday guy’ in my circle of friends but I had somebody remember mine this year for a change and it made my entire f**king day. It's so absolutely worth the few seconds it takes to make a note for future use." TBoneUprising

This is a hard one for many people...

“The ability to be frank about their own faults.” ​Smooth-Revolution958

Beingkind when it's not expected shows good character.

​“When you see them help someone in need while they really don't have to.” gargan_tua

“That's the trait that made fall for my now husband. We were on a bike ride and it had started raining so we were going fast. An old guy dropped his newspaper and then his cane when trying to pick it up. Now husband stopped picked both up, put them in the man's hands and told him to have a nice day before getting back on his bike like nothing happened.” iam_whoiam

​“Someone who listens and shows interest in other people. It's hard to dislike someone when they're friendly and seem genuinely happy to see you.” deepthots20

The cool people will be more likeable at first glance."

“A calm, happy demeanor. Being able to laugh at themselves or self-deprecate or not get pissy when people toss jokes at their expense. Smiles and warm eyes. That type of person will always do well in social circles.”

“Because they cause no static, no drama. They are just always showing off an appearance of ‘no stress, good vibes, happy go lucky, let's laugh and have fun!‘ That is very attractive in friendships.”

“No one likes that a**hole who gets all pissy when jokes are lobbed their way. Especially if they will roast other people but get butthurt when they are the target. No one likes a depressed sour puss.”

“No one likes someone who is already b*tching or getting mad over politics or always super stressed out and riding manic cycles... No one likes someone ruining the vibe and causing drama. Usually, you can sense it on people quickly too. When you meet people you can tell who is sincerely very cool, and who is not, for whatever reason. The cool people will be more likeable at first glance.” daithisfw

Being inclusive is important...

​“When the person makes an effort to make everyone in a group setting feel included. I've always been the quiet and shy type, so I have huge respect for the people who find ways to include me in the conversation.” gabbykoenig

​Be kind to service workers.

​“Being nice to people in the service or retail industry. If I'm with someone and something happens at dinner or at the register and they're super polite and cool about it, then I know they're solid.” iBeleiveInSpace

In general, the qualities that make someone instantly likable are those related to being kind, being compassionate, and being inclusive. Qualities we all can be intentional about fostering.

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