Now for the most part, when making major life choices, being sober should be an essential ingredient in the process. But every once and a Blue Moon (and I do mean the beer with a shot) the choices we make while under the influence, can be some of the greatest decisions we ever make during the course of our lives. So cheers and enjoy that new car or vacation or moose you adopted.
Redditor u/Feerka wanted to discuss the times we've all lived our best lives after several rounds of libation by asking.... What is the best decision you've made while drunk?Hi Molson
Cat Kitten GIF by DemicGiphyI went to a party in college and came home with a cat. I was petting the house owner's cat and he asked if I wanted a kitten, they had found him outside and he was in rough shape. He is now 7 years old and appropriately named Molson.
All Aboard....
I booked a vacation to New Orleans at 3 AM while blackout drunk. I got awesome deals on airfare and a nice hotel. Even booked it to perfectly fit into my work schedule. I have no idea how I pulled it off, but it was like getting a gift from a stranger.
The Healer
We had a get together at my place a couple years ago, just me and 3 of my classmates. One of them recently broke up with his GF and was heartbroken.
We got quite drunk and they left the next morning, but said classmate came back for his charger and told me that thanks to what I've said the day before, they are getting back together with GF.
I was glad obviously, but to this day I have no clue what I've told him. I was very drunk. They're still together btw.
Yummy!
Licking Jackie Chan GIFGiphyI made grilled cheese at 2 am once, but instead of using plain toast I made it with garlic bread.
Craving Water
I've left (and continue to do so) a pint glass of ice on my bedside table so I can't drink it immediately, but when i wake up with that 4am cotton mouth thirst:
Big glass cold water waiting, no getting up.
This is why I keep my water bottle next to the bed. My mom's cat knocked a glass of water over my head when I was a teenager (had one of those beds with the little shelf in the headboard). Not fun at 3am. My cat will still knock over the bottle, but at least there no mess.
Geronimo!!
Dude, my last 3 vacations and skydiving trips were all planned completely hammered. The first time was so successful I almost believe I plan better. Since July Ive been skydiving twice, kayaking, saw all the San Diego zoo, got a sunburn, went camping, went fishing, visited old friends across the country. If I plan sober i worry about money and all the legwork to plan/pull it off.
NO CLUE!
I got really hammered one night and started missing my mom (even though I talked to her regularly) because I lived very far away so I didn't see her often. Apparently I called her and spoke to her for about a hour (according to my phone log). The next day when I called her to apologize for whatever dumb sh!t I said, she told me that it was the most wonderful conversation she'd ever had and that I made her feel so proud to be my mom.
I have NO CLUE what I said to her and I never had the heart to tell her that I couldn't remember the call. She died 2 years ago and I never did find out what I said to her. Just gonna ETA to say how wonderful it has been to be able to share memories of my mom. She really was wonderful and I'm so glad for any chance I have to tell people how much she meant to me.
On the Road
easy rider motorcycles GIFGiphyMy friend and I were drunk when we decided to do a 2000 mile motorcycle trip. We did it a few months later and had a blast. We now have a rule that if we both agree to a ridiculous trip while drinking, The Agreement must be Honored.
The Final Moments
I used to deliver small airplanes as a sort of side-gig. The best part for me, was simply being by myself, often for days, and just enjoying leisurely flights over the US.
One evening several years ago, I'd had a few too many and invited my dad to join me on a 3-4 day trip to deliver some guy's new plane from the Northwest.
Disclaimer: Although I care about him, dad can be very stressful to travel with on long trips. So the next morning I was a little annoyed with myself for doing this.
Due to medical issues, that turned out to be the last vacation he ever had, and we had a great time. I'd hate to have missed that week with him.
A Special Treat
GiphyNine years ago stumbling to the pita shop after the bars closed with my friends, I drunkenly ordered a falafel pita instead of my usual. Blew my mind and changed my life.
The Carpool....
Not to carpool with my homie after a huge mansion party, where we all got drunk. I had done it before but got some smart impulse not to this time. After I took an uber and got home to sleep, I woke up from my alcohol induced sleep and found out from his mom, that he ended up flipping the car into a canyon, the roof caved, he broke his neck, and ended up with (what luckily turned out to be) temporary paralysis. As thankful as I am that he's well and walking now, and just as functional a person as he once was, I'm glad I didn't take the car ride with him.
Cookies....
cookie monster cookies GIF by Sesame StreetGiphyI wrote "get with the cookie delivery guy" as my entry on the "Goals for Spring Semester" list we posted on the wall in my college apartment. Then we invited the cookie delivery guy up for a party.
That was almost eight years ago. We got married last October.
Adoption
A friend and I were very drunk and I was talking about how I wanted to get a dog. I've had them my whole life but never one of my own. We browsed the local shelter's website and I found one that looked and sounded perfect.
The next morning, we went to the shelter. We were both super hungover, so much so that my friend threw up in the corner of their outdoor area.
I met my future dog, played with him a bit and told them I would be back the next day to take him home. And if I'm being honest, I was in that half drunk/half hungover phase.
I went back the next day and picked him up. My friends kept asking if I was rushing into it and I just brushed them off.
7 years later, we've moved 5 times, including across the country, and he's been my best friend the entire time. He's been the one constant in my life since I got him.
Although I personally regret nothing, PLEASE do not get a dog on a (drunken or sober) whim unless you are 100% dedicated.
Leaves it here....
Decided that maple leaves look like little hands and proceeded to high five every tree I saw. Happiest night ever. Still high five cute leaves sometimes and give myself a good chuckle (Always wondered when I'd stop being a lurker and finally be compelled to comment. This is apparently it.)
21...
When I was 21 I was quite the alcoholic and I had started using drugs quite frequently. It started to develop into an addiction as I was doing it alone at my house on a daily basis.
One day I was drinking alone at home and went to the gas station to pick up some smokes. On the way back, a high school friend of mine was walking his dog, and I picked him up.
He wanted to smoke and so we went back to my place. He started talking about how he just got out of rehab and was telling me about how bad addiction was, all of the signs, etc. He had no clue I was usingg.
I very emotionally opened up to him and ended up throwing it into the trash. Haven't touched the crap since. To this day the decision to go to the gas station to buy cigarettes when I was drunk was the best one I have ever made.
Happy Endings
just married love GIFGiphyAt the end of the night I asked out a girl from our work group who I thought I would never have a chance with.
That was almost 3 years ago and we just got married last month.
Mascots
I bought a mascot sized Pikachu costume from China. Didn't even realize until a few weeks later when I started getting angry emails in Chinese chasing me for payment. It's quite fun though, I tend to dress it in other costumes and take it to conventions. Here's me attending UK Comic Con as Pikachu Thor.
EDIT: forgot about this. Here's an interview I did with a lovely person about it all. Skip to 7:20.
Thanks Me....
An Amazon box was delivered to me with a SNES classic. Had so much fun with it. No memory of ordering it. When I checked my email it was ordered at like 3am on a Saturday. Thanks drunk me, I finally got to play through Super Metroid.
Damn You Bacardi!!!
Hosted a massive college house party and I was extremely intoxicated and made the decision to steal my roommates Bacardi O and mix with orange juice (definitely should have stopped at this point). I don't remember much, but I remember pouring about a shot of orange juice and filling the tall glass with rum until it became clear. I woke up the next morning next to the very large empty Bacardi bottle and feeling wonderful - however remorseful that I stole from my best friend.
I profusely apologized that evening (when friend finally recovered) and committed to replacing said bottle - but he broke out into a uncontrollable laughter (to the extent it caused him to dry heave). The bottle was destined to join our many decorative liquor bottles and had been filled with water accordingly. I never lived down my night of binge drinking Bacardi H2O!
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Redditor Frozen_yoghurt123 asked:
"Who is the 'black sheep' of your family?"
I'm the black sheep or at least I'd like to think so.
Join me...
Scandal
"Probably my dad's cousin, who went to prison for murdering his lover's husband."
DW_555
Oh My Wow GIFGiphy"biggest disappointment"
"My Dad. He is the only one of 6 siblings who wasn't a huge f**k up. And yet, before my Grandma died she stated that he was her 'biggest disappointment.' He is estranged from his surviving siblings... not by his choice. It honestly blows my mind."
Unfair_Biscotti2828
"Toxicity is often a group mindset thing; people don't want you to leave because they are dysfunctionally co-dependent on each other and need each other to justify their own shortcomings in life. A lot of the 'family loyalty' stuff is typically shouted loudest by those who are the least good idea to stay loyal towards."
Creative_Recover
The Dead
"My great uncle who stole my great grandfathers identity, stole a couple million dollars, and ran off. No one even knew he was alive until my great grandfathers funeral in 2009. No one has seen him since. My grandma started to cry because she honestly thought he was dead."
"Everyone else just kind of nodded on his direction and went on with the rest of the funeral. I just remember being very confused because I was 9 and I had never met this guy who my dad pulled me aside and told me he was my great uncle. It was a few years later that I got the full story."
valkyrieonaunicorn
"matriarch"
"According to my mean aunt, the 'matriarch' in her own mind, it's my twin brother because "he doesn't care about family now that he's a doctor." (He's a resident. Chief resident. He works ridiculous hours and spends the rest of the time recovering from work.)"
"According to my ex-MIL (who still counts because she's Son's grandma), it's me, for divorcing her son."
"According to everyone else, it's Mean Aunt. The rest of us are warm and caring and compassionate. We have our moments; all of us have been accidentally thoughtless or done something selfish once in a while, but we're not deliberately mean and snarky all the time."
insertcaffeine
Everybody
"My immediate family are the black sheep of the entire family."
DarthDregan
John Stamos Cheers GIF by GrandfatheredGiphySounds like everyone has a little black sheep in them.
People Issues
"By now, my brother for cutting off everyone because he prefers his rude, selfish, paranoid, narcissist wife over all of us."
"My wife is the black sheep of her family in the sense that she's the only one who isn't a rude, selfish, paranoid narcissist."
Lvcivs2311
Joe Dirt Brother GIFGiphySo Dumb
"Me. My granddaddy told me 'I’ve only had the sheriff knock on my door two times in my 80 years, and both times he was looking for you! 'I did some dumb sh*t, caused a little trouble, burned a few bridges but always managed to stay out of jail. Partly because my sister has kept an attorney on retainer for me since I was 16."
This_Personality3731
Liar Liar
"My younger brother (2nd of 4) is a compulsive liar and it got him in a lot of little trouble as a teen, then he told his wife he graduated a big college when we're not even sure if he got his GED because he failed to graduate HS, went to some GED school and eventually just stopped going."
"IF he graduated college, he never mentioned he was going in the 4+ years it takes nor mention graduation or have a diploma. He's not a bad dude, but now family time is super awkward when he and his wife are talking about 'their' college team."
UniqueUsername82D
The NOT good girl...
"My aunt's daughter. She’s been in jail for drugs, stolen money from my aunt and other family members to use on drugs and physically abused my aunt. My aunt has tried getting her help, but nothing has worked. She’s just not a good person, and everyone in my family, except my aunt, doesn’t want anything to do with her. I haven’t seen her in 8 years now, and I’m happy about that."
Hello_Im_the_world
Maria?
"A former nun - my great aunt - left the religious life and got married. She called herself 'the black sheep of the family' because her habit was black."
Back2Bach
Excited Julie Andrews GIF by The Rodgers & Hammerstein OrganizationGiphyWell the black sheep sound like the most interesting family members.
Redditor OldAboba asked:
"What is the best non-sexual physical feeling you’ve ever felt?"
Adele. Adele live. She sends me.
Floating
Relaxed Exit Strategy GIF by Hannah Bronfman Giphy"I got a professional full body (everything but my man parts) massage a few years back for the first and so far only time at a spa after the recommendation from a coworker. I felt like I was floating on a cloud for the next few days."
gil_beard
Through your nose...
"Sneezing when you're sick. Then you get that about 20 second feeling of breathing through your nose again and you like ahh that's what I aspire to at the moment."
Sanguiniutron
"Or the very last sneeze of your illness. During a fire drill in high school, I was ambling out after fighting a head old for a few days. The alarm was killing my head which was already throbbing from the sinus pressure."
"I was nearing the field, well away from my classmates, when I cough/sneezed out a huge, green loogie - cleared it about three feet, no icky trail - and by the time I was walking back to the building I was feeling pretty much back to normal. No more head cold after that. Never had something like that ever happen again where there was such an abrupt end to the head cold."
NnyIsSpooky
'migraine cocktail'
"Right after a migraine goes away. It's almost a spiritual experience."
LarryLong*alls_
"This was going to be my answer. I was in the ER one time for a really bad migraine. They gave me what they called a 'migraine cocktail.' When they pushed it through the IV I could feel the cold liquid make its way through my body, up to my head. Once it hit my brain, the migraine was gone. It was pure ecstasy. Even better was that cocktail had Benadryl in it so I fell asleep not long after and slept so good."
master_baitor12
Shake It
"That stretch til you shake when you wake up."
Quanisha8472
"I once stretched too hard in the morning and got the worst calf cramp ever... it looked like a prune and I thought I would die from the pain. Couldn't stretch in bed for months afterwards out of fear it would happen again."
tevelis
"When you move over 50, it turns into that stretch til you put your back into a muscle spasm that lasts days."
wrichards12
The Itch
Scratching Feel Good GIF by 60 Second DocsGiphy"I had a cast and splint on both my legs for 2 months. When they cut it off, they scratched my legs for me and the itch was just top notch! Yeah."
Existing-Seat5962
Itching an itch can change a life.
YUM!
Emma Stone High Quality GIFGiphy"When you're starving all day and devour a bomb a** meal."
Lime_Rose
Sleep for Life
"When you’ve been up for 20 hours+ and finally get into bed and you just know it’ll be the best sleep of your life."
Ok_Sprinkles_8777
"But man, after 36+ hours, the body sort of aches and it's hard to fall asleep despite being completely exhausted. Then the restless legs kick in... ugh. I do agree that a 20hr-ish stint is amazing to cuddle into, especially if you don't have to get up at any specific time the next day."
curlyfat
"Makes it better when you’ve been sleep deprived for weeks and know you have NO PLANS tomorrow and can sleep as much as you need."
Batcraft10
That Feeling
"When you're absolutely busting for a pee and you can finally go!"
Apprehensive_Pen_793
"Apparently there’s a thing called a 'pee-gasm' that people (usually women) have that causes an orgasmic feeling when you pee after holding it for a while! I’ve definitely experienced this and I’ve intentionally waited a while so I could have that good feeling... lol."
cocoawhirl
I Can Hear!!
"The feeling of water leaving your ear after being there all day."
Apprehensive_Bet_438
"I had some impacted earwax for a week in one ear, and when it finally got removed it was the best feeling in the world. Initially it was like having a tv or radio in my ear that only had static, but then I could hear. Good god, I could hear. It was amazing."
doodwhatsrsly
"Oh man, and it’s WARM from being in your head, and the warmth makes the sensation of leaving even better."
AngiesPhalanges
A Good Rest
dog puppy GIFGiphy"Sleeping in a warm blanket in winters."
Puitzza
"Or sleeping in a cold blanket in summer."
pitypuruty
I am enthralled by all of those things.
Redditor Gold-Ad-2827 asked:
"People with mental disorders: What do you hate being told the most?"
I hated being told to just smile. You smile and go away.
Duh
seth meyers GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy"It's all in your head. Where else would it?! My colon?"
glorified_throwaway
Don't Minimize
"Everybody goes through that."
rukasu83
"This saying makes my blood boil. Or the 'I was that age once too ya know' yeah no sh*t you were that age once. And just because you were that age once doesn’t mean we have the same experience."
MasterOfRNoSleep
"They try to minimize it."
Previous_Ad7725
Stellar Advice
"You're worried? Just stop."
"You're sad? Just don't be."
"You're compulsively binge eating? Eat less."
"Thanks for that stellar advice."
CrayolaSocks
"Or even better, 'Just do it!' As if ADHD paralysis can be stopped with a can-do attitude."
HumanityIsACesspool
"physical health"
"I get so frustrated when people treat the idea of 'holistic medicine' as some kind of woo. How does it escape so many people that the body works holistically? Even a lot of doctors seem to ignore this. It's very frustrating when you have 2 or 3 or 4 illnesses that are all affecting each other, and your 'physical health' is held distinct from your mental health, and nothing anyone is doing to treat you works because no one's looking at the whole system."
"I just got a lecture from a psychiatrist I am seeing about nutrition, and he apologized to me for doing so but I told him, 'No, I appreciate it. Do it for all your patients.' because it told me he's trying to look at the whole picture and actually fix what's wrong. It gave me faith in him."
TheLastKirin
Relax
Calm Down Golden Girls GIF by TV LandGiphy"You need to calm down."
sorceress__stoned
"Never is the history of calm down has calm down ever caused anyone to calm down."
LBIdockrat
Calm down. I hate that one. You calm down.
Tips
Season 23 Reaction GIF by Law & OrderGiphy"When they try to give me tips on what to do, like bruh as if I didn't already try that."
Mediocre_Ad8282
The Standard
"You don't look sad. No crap... that's so I can avoid having this conversation. Also depression isn't 'being sad' like people think."
allgamerprogram
"God, I hate this. It's because saying 'I'm depressed' has been standard for people expressing that they're slightly unhappy about something dumb like not getting enough croutons on their salad or some crap. Now that's just what everyone assumes you mean when you say you have depression."
NilPill
Be Faster
"'Stop being lazy.'"
LadyBirdLadyBirdLady
“'Lazy' is when you don’t want to do anything at all. 'Executive disfunction' is when you can do everything at all, but that one easy quick thing that you do want to do just makes you and your brain freeze completely days ahead. I’m tired of people not understand that even when I explain and look at me like I’m bullshitting instead."
_Varien_
Ways to Cope
"Maybe you should try praying harder. I did, He prescribed medication."
Ms_Schuesher
"Praying is a way to cope for a lot of people, I think. That's totally fine, but insisting on praying in lieu of getting real help or actually addressing the issue is when it is not only unhelpful, but dangerously detrimental."
TheFrustrated
"Religious people will bypass everyone’s cultures, identity, views, and feelings just to be right and make a point. it’s disgusting. I read somewhere that real so called Christianity is all wrong. The real faith is from the Aramaic history and all the meanings were misinterpreted and the stories and all were made up by Catholics wanting to control their people. Yuck."
RisingPhoenix5271
'contamination'
Disgusted Season 6 GIF by Brooklyn Nine-NineGiphy"As someone with OCD with a lot of attention to 'contamination', having someone try to explain contradictions in why I'm doing something that is technically unclean when I wouldn't do something that is technically clean due to OCD. There are a few doorknobs that I will not touch no matter how much you clean them in front of me and I know it makes no sense, if it made sense I wouldn't have OCD i'd just be cleanly."
Zoooples
Stop trying to be an armchair therapist. Be empathetic to people first.