Redditor u/Slow_Koala wanted to hear from those who have been touched by the sadness of losing others to suicide. Maybe anyone reading can find some solace or a reason to reach out. Life is often unbearable and lonely but there is always a chance for life to turn around. Extinguishing your life is an extreme you can never take back. You are loved. And to those left behind it can often feel like a prison sentence that never sets you free. We all need to check in on one another more. Be kind.
My amazing cousin killed himself when I was 16. He was 26. We found the note a few weeks later. He'd singled out immediate family members with a love / good bye note. No one else except his 4 siblings and parents. Then there was my mum, my brother, and then me at the bottom. "You're going to grow up and be amazing; you're going to be a star."
You don't know weight till your fav person in the world thinks the world of you, and that's the last thing they think before they die. And you have no idea how to live up to it. Haunting and inspiring. You don't forget it. gmewhite
I was a teenager and a close friend killed herself. She wanted me to have her music collection, leather jacket, and a screenplay she wrote. Eyeletblack
My mom committed suicide after finding out that her tumor was malignant, she had just lost her father a year before and her mother died in treatment for cancer,she laid everything out notes to specific people and how she wanted things done. I have always been an old soul and she planned for me to find her as I would be the reasonable person I am. But that day I was invited to try out for the debate team so I came home late..... and my little sister was the one who found her. pootiemane
He just got back from Iraq - Marine. He called me up. I wasn't very close to him but we both served. Michael. We talked for about two weeks before it happened. He talked about how much he loved his Mom; his brothers in the service. I thought everything was normal - that's crap we all talk about after coming home.
He shot himself over the phone. I still can't get the sound out of my head. Navy took two weeks to send a chaplain. Then NCIS was involved.
When I returned home I found out that he had left a ruck for me. He left a rucksack for me and I couldn't do anything for him. He gave it to his parents and had asked them to give it to me. DevilsAdvocate9
One of my best friend's mother committed suicide and had a little message for her two children in her suicide note. It was mostly straight down the line apologetic, and an explanation as to why.
Spinal Cancer which metastasized and it was only downhill for her. She did her taxes, paid all her bills, got all her paperwork in order. Wrote a farewell note and swallowed a bottle of painkillers.
I only managed to see a small section of the note as I was the second non-emergency person on the scene (my friend was the first), but enough to know it was her way of trying to make things as painless as possible for everyone else. Engineer_Man
Best friend hung himself in his room, New Year's Day 2015 - left one note saying "I'm so sorry mum." on his bed. She found him. So he didn't mention me, but it's the same topic I suppose.
His mum and I scattered his ashes together, and she gave me a jacket and necklace of his that he always had on. Haven't taken the necklace off since, and I have a tattoo of his birthday on my arm - it really affected me heavily, and I developed bad anger issues from it all. I'm much better now though. puffpuffpoo
Even though nobody was mentioned, this specific note stays close to my heart to this day.
My dad is a retired detective, and one day a few years ago he came home from work visually distraught. I usually talk to him about his day so I asked him what was wrong and he told me a young man (I think around 22) had committed suicide and the note broke his heart. I asked what it said and it read something like "Mom, Dad, I'm sorry I couldn't be stronger. I hope to see you both someday in a place that's beautiful". MikeCozzi
I remember when a friend of mine for ten years died. It wasn't a traditional suicide note. He told me over Skype. I still have the conversation saved. He told me how good I was to him. he told me how I was like the angel Michael to him. He called me his brother.
I tried to stop him. I tried to contact his relatives. His sister didn't care. I still remember that night. I kinda remember him waiting for Diablo 3 to be released. He died before it did though.
I wish he was still alive. We would have laughed at the irony, Diablo 3 was @%& terrible when it came out. Oh my dear beautiful J, you would have really hated the piece of crap it was on release and we could have both laughed at the irony that you stayed alive long enough to see it. Illigard
Used to know this woman, who's ex husband killed himself and used his suicide note to tell his children (6 and 8 yo) that their mummy killed him and not only was it her fault, but theirs too. And the police dealing with it had to be physically stopped by the mother from reading it to her damn kids. One of the more fucked up stories from where I live. CollaborativeKale
My girlfriend killed herself a little over a year ago. We were fighting and I was planning to leave her. She sent me a message that she hoped her death weighed heavy on me for a long time while I was sleeping. She was dead in the bed next to me when I woke up. Now... regrets and nightmares. It's 4:30am. I'll go to sleep when the sun comes up, sleeping at night it's difficult. 502red428
Around May two years ago, my mother tried to commit suicide and I remember finding the note after I found her. When I went to "find her" I thought she was somebody trying to break into our house so I went and grabbed a knife, it turns out the noise I heard was her body flopping against the door. I ended up being able to make sure she was okay but I think what killed me most was her note. She stated that my two sisters and I were all she had and (since we were growing up) she didn't have us anymore. She wanted to leave this world so badly. HedgeHog02
I was thanked in my friends suicide note. I was with him the night he passed. I didn't know he was going to do it, he just said he was upset and wanted to meet up for a smoke and a chat.
I believe I was the last person to see him alive. It really hit me hard when I found out he had passed.
He was a good friend. We'd known each other for about a decade. Went to the same school and lived around the corner from each other. He told me his secrets that he couldn't tell his girlfriend or family. AJTwinky
Not really a suicide one but a end-of-life-goodbye one. He was sick and almost got through it, but at the end with weak immune system, cold was enough to get inflammations on everything... He was almost 18. Till this day the perfect person for me. And most important of all, the only real rock i had who was there from the moment we first met. He wanted to make me laugh. He always did that. Made a few jokes. Terrible ones, dad ones. Still made me laugh, and made the pain more durable. I miss those lame jokes... hero3na
It was my dad's note. Telling us boys that he is so proud of the men we've become and even just writing that now makes me cry happy and sad tears. It's been just over four years now.
He was a great dad and had such a profoundly positive impact on who I am today. Even with how it ended, I couldn't ask for a better dad. He was something else. I'm a lucky kid.
Wish he could see me now. I'm glad he knew my wife before he went. Wish he could meet my nephew.
I love you dad. I still miss the hell out of you, you ornery old hippie. You're still my hero. Thank you. For everything.
Welp, wasn't expecting that wave. Thank you. It's been a minute since I cried for him. aph0r1zm
He sent me a separate note the day before he did it.
"Thanks for existing, i love you"
I just answered with "love you too, bud". I had no idea. Aenator
My stepdad committed suicide when I was about 7 years old. In his letter he wrote he was lonely since my mother left him. He mentioned that he couldn't live anymore because I didn't want to see him anymore and didn't want to talk to him on the phone when he called my mother the last time. I found him hanging on my grandmother's attic where I played hide and seek with my cousin. At this time he was 3 weeks dead.
It's difficult to think about it. Even though I know I was just a child and I had my reasons (he was an alcoholic who was violent when he drank), I still feel guilty. And for that feeling I hate him. On the other hand I know he was a wreck, destroyed by his parents. But neither my mother nor I were responsible for this. littleweirdbutok
No note, just a phone call to preteen me that had stayed up too late because my single-parent mother had gone out looking to score whatever pills would sate her addiction (kid me had no idea, adult me now knows it was obvious). I don't remember the call completely, but I do remember being annoyed she'd kicked me off the dialup by calling in.
She said and made me promise a bunch of things that felt very serious but also very confusing and then we hung up. Police officer knocked on the door a few hours later and everything changed. No one but me knows about that phone call, especially not my brother.
I'll be the exact same age she was, down to the hour, in roughly 500 days. I keep a countdown timer on my phone. One of the promises she made me make was to live longer than she did. Oceanis46dot1
He wanted me to know he loved me. That it wasn't my fault. That I was "the best friend anyone could want or have." That I should have his car. That he thought he was going mad and was saving his brother and me from the maddness.
I showed the note to my therapist. She thinks he had schizophrenia. His Mom did.
Its been 6 years. Im still not over his death. Doubt I ever will be. DANDELIONBOMB
I had lived with Craig for about eight months before he killed himself. I'd known him for four years before that. We met at a metal gig and he was a short, thin guy who almost got trampled in a mosh pit. We knew he was going a bad way as soon as he started hanging out with the group we all knew did heroin and similar regularly (maybe two months after we started living together). I tried to help him as much as I could.
There were so many nights when he got back, clearly out of his mind on whatever it was he'd been doing and he'd stay on the couch in my room instead of going to his own. He didn't like to be alone. I spent a lot of mornings cooking for him and generally making sure he was okay, but it was like shoveling snow in a blizzard. He'd just go do the same the next night. At the end of that eight months we found him in his room having overdosed. We realized it was intentional when we read his note.
A lot of it was about his family problems, his mental health and just generally how terrible he thought the world was. Then near the end was a little paragraph about me, thanking me but saying I made the decision to end his life more complicated. He asked me not to blame myself. He then rambled some more and it was clear he'd been high whilst writing it. I moved out a month later. FifthForestMonk
When my stepdad, and the father of my three younger brothers killed himself last month, he didn't leave a note. What he did do (I didn't even know that was possible) was queue up three texts, so they wouldn't be received until the morning after. At exactly 8 am, all three of my brothers received a text from him.
To my two oldest brothers (19 and 17): "I love you forever. I'm sorry, I just can't live with this any longer."
To my youngest brother (13): "You are a very special boy and I'll love you forever xx".
I asked my youngest brother if it had made it better or worse. He said worse. LifeIsAKindergarten
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
Don't be alarmed: There are some terrible corporations out there (looking at you, Nestle) but there are also some great brands that are selling decent products.
I know, surprising, right? Maybe we've all just gotten used to brands selling things of questionable quality that when we stumble across something worthwhile it stuns us.
Hold on tight when you find a brand deserving of your loyalty!
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor spwf asked the online community,
"What brand(s) do you swear by and why?"
"Their cast iron pans..."
"Lodge. Their cast iron pans are super durable and can last a lifetime."
Not just a lifetime. Your Lodge cast iron will outlive you, if (and even if you don’t) take care of it. Even if they get rusty they can be resurfaced. And damn is it satisfying to resurface a forgotten cast iron pan.
Asics, specifically the Gel-Nimbus series. I've suffered from joint pain and unbearable plantar fasciitis from a relatively young age... These shoes are life savers. Very pricey and I don't love the look of tennis shoes of any type but nevertheless I will praise these shoes to the end of days. Hopefully, I will always be able to afford them once a year.
Glad to hear you've found some much-needed relief!
"Warranty and service..."
"Victorinox. Excellent pocket knives, multi tools and their kitchen knives are probably the best ones you can get under 100 USD. Warranty and service is top notch."
Anyone who cooks, but can't afford or doesn't want to invest in a professional-grade chef's knife should get a Victorinox. They aren't nearly as good as a top tier professional chef's knife, but they are night and day compared with everything else in their price range.
"This one brand..."
"This one brand of granola bars called Sunbelt Bakery. Every other granola bar brand is so dry I can't eat them anymore."
Yes, these are so good! An excellent choice.
"Dickies. High quality pants. They're meant to be work pants so they're pretty durable and breathe well. Very comfortable."
"High quality" is right. Those pants last forever.
"It helps clean..."
"Dawn dishsoap. It helps clean dishes and it's great when one of my kids has an accident and I have to wash their clothes. Sometimes leaves a small stain but no smell. It has saved so many outfits."
Fantastic – it sounds like you should be their salesperson.
"They don't use..."
"New Balance. They don't use slave labor to make shoes."
They are comfortable and fit well.
I personally still don't like the aesthetics of many of their shoes, but still recommend them to people who want a good shoe.
"They are a retailer..."
"REI. Stand behind everything in their store. They are a retailer but you can beat something up they sell and they give you a full refund."
Many people use them for shoes, for camping gear... all kinds of stuff. They're very reliable.
"I wear my Timberland boots..."
"I wear my Timberland boots almost every day, I’ve had them for almost ten years, and they’re still just about as sturdy as they were the day I bought them."
These shoes tend to last forever. "Durable" is the perfect word.
"One large bottle..."
"Dr. Bronner's Castile soap. One large bottle lasts me about a year and I use it for everything. No toxic BS in them like pretty much every other soap and they smell fantastic."
"Also when I say everything I really mean it. All purpose cleaner, dish soap, body wash, shampoo, carpet extractor wash, dog shampoo, it’s called 18 in 1 for a reason."
If you're interested in the story behind the company, the documentary Dr. Bronner's Magic Soapbox might be right up your alley.
See? Not all brands are terrible. After reading about some of these, it might be time to change of your buying habits.
Have some suggestions of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!
You know what would be great?
If society could just stop with arbitrary dress codes. If you're not working with the public, why should you have to dress up so much? If you're a police officer, then it makes sense that you'd wear a uniform that identifies you as a police officer. If you're Ted from IT who sits in the backroom all day, I really don't see why you have to come in every day in a suit and tie.
Let's just toss them out, shall we?
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Levels2ThisBrush asked the online community,
"What should be socially acceptable but isn't?"
"Leaving the office..."
"Leaving the office whenever you've finished your tasks for the day."
This is why I'm so glad remote work is the new office.
"And yet, I get it!"
"Taking off sick from work, WITHOUT giving an invasive reason. I supervise a small team and so I see all the OOO emails, and for gods sake I want people to PLEASE not feel the need to explain in detail what kind of diarrhea is afflicting them, or how bad their period cramps are, or how much bad sushi they ate the night before. Just say “I’m under the weather, I won’t be online today.”"
"And yet, I get it! I do it too! I feel guilty or like I’ll be looked at with suspicion if my reason for taking off isn’t sufficiently debilitating enough!"
"But… we need to stop this. As a manager I don’t care, I don’t THINK the people above me who are also on these emails care… let’s just all agree to take sick days without any details from now on!"
I do not miss my retail days where I had to organise someone to cover me and beg on bended knee.
"Cashiers or workers who don’t need to be standing all day not having a stool or chair."
Another thing I do not miss from my retail days. Having to stand for hours and hours only to come home with my feet killing me was not fun.
"Prices on apartments..."
"Prices on apartments and their respectable reasons for such price directly on their websites or advertising without the need for a tour or any secrecy."
I always assume if I have to ask the price I probably can’t afford it.
"Being quiet/not wanting to engage in conversation all the time."
In Finland, if somebody tries to talk to you, they are probably a tourist.
"Choosing not to..."
"Choosing not to have toxic family members in your life."
It feels very liberating once you accept that you don't have to put up with it.
"Employees calling customers out in public for being a**holes."
Absolutely. Many customers get away with treating employees horribly because they know they can do it without any pushback... most of the time.
"The fact that I sometimes..."
"The fact that I sometimes need to take my insulin in public. No, Karen, I am not doing drugs, I need to live."
You’re getting that sweet sweet insulin high… the high of being not-dead.
"Afternoon naps. I’m on team nap. Give me 25 minutes to charge up and I’ll give you back 3 hours of high quality work. Everyone wins. Plus I go home with extra energy instead of dead tired."
Short naps don't work for me. I can't do a 25 min recharge. When I take a nap it needs to be like a solid 2 hours
"Salary transparency. For some reason, in the US, there’s a taboo or stigma around discussing one’s salary. This should be done openly and freely, with zero embarrassment or judgment. The only winners from avoiding these conversations are the corporations that are able to pay people differently for the same roles. Speak up!"
The "for some reason" you're referring to is simply propaganda on behalf of corporations.
It's evident that something's got to change around here, and we're mad as hell and we're not going to take it anymore!
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
As much as many of us don't like to disrupt the status quo, there is only so much time a person can tolerate a miserable situation before things become so unbearable that they ultimately have to peace out.
For some people, it takes a while for them to reach a breaking point. Eventually, there comes a time when they realize their self-worth is more important than continuing to please others who don't appreciate them for the sake of keeping up with appearances.
Curious to hear from people whose patience ran thin and made a strong decision, Reddit Prestigious-Order-62 asked:
"What made you say 'f'k this sh*t im out?'"
The unwarranted reprimanding was something that was never mentioned in the initial job description.
"In the late 90’s."
"One time I got pulled into the Security office at a Department store I worked at. They accused me of constantly using the sales day coupons for people that didn’t present one (we always kept an extra copy at each register). I had watched my own department boss do it many times so I assumed it was okay. We didn’t even collect the coupons to be counted for the cash office, we just chucked them after use."
"They claimed I lost the store hundreds of dollars and had been watching me 'for months' do this awful, unforgivable crime for people spending 90 bucks on already bloated price designer jeans. I’m sure the occasional 10% discount was just devastating. 🙄""I got this huge lecture of how I was LITERALLY stealing from the store and they COULD call the police but would give me a chance to work off the damage. I couldn’t believe how criminal I was made to feel over it. The best part when they called my boss in who pretended to have never done it before to save her own a**."
"I asked if they were firing me. They said 'Yes and No. You will be let go, but you can choose to work off the damages so we don’t take you to court.' I told them I will just quit and asked for my last check. They said they will deduct what I owe from my last check. And I said 'Well then you need to show me all the footage and prove that I was stealing.' They wouldn’t produce footage, finally called the cops, and when the cops arrived, they were just as confused and called it an internal problem and advised them that this was overblown. I think they felt sorry for me. So finally upper management came in and just said 'just issue the last check, I will sign it here.' So much drama over so stupid a thing."
"It was sad because that actual day my Mom and daughter had come to the mall to meet me for lunch and I had to explain I just was forced to quit that job and was never allowed in that store again like I was some awful jerk."
"It was nice a few short years later, the entire chain bankrupted."
"A coworker waited until we were in front of a large group of people to start 'disciplining' me for something 'wrong' I did (I took my lunch 15 mins late to help another coworker) when she wasn’t even my supervisor. Applied for a job transfer the next day and couldn’t be happier where I am now."
"I had a piece of sh*t of a boss. He'd praise you in private but berate you in public. In front of coworkers and customers. Always about stuff that didn't matter."
"He'd also happily break company policy to side with customers after you spent an hour telling a customer you can't give them stuff for free, for example. Any time he was around, everything was miserable."
"My only regret is that I wasn't there to see him marched out by corporate when he got fired, because I had gone on to a better job by then."
Human Punching Bag
"I used to work in a Kitchen at a pub, it was grim work, but I had freinds there and had worked there for 3 years, So it wasn't too bad."
"One Christmas season we were being absolutely pumped, full out functions and busy services. My boss at the time was very stressed and fair enough, We were busy, We were all working overtime and full out. He used any excuse to completely blow up and absolutely scream at me for little to no reason, essentially him yelling at me was his stress relief. But fine, whatever, kitchens are rough places, no appolagies or anything, move on."
"I then go away for 3 weeks over the Christmas holidays and spend the time road tripping around the country having an amazing time."
"First shift back, not pleased being back, he makes a snarky comment."
"F'k this, Im out."
Even though these employees weren't chewed out in front of co-workers, the low salary without room for negotiation made them not wanting to stick around for much longer.
You Only Get One Job
"They cut my hours so I had to get a second job. 3 days before I was supposed to start said second job, my manager at the main job told me that I couldn't get this second job because I had main job first and I needed to make it my priority. That's when I said f'k you and left. I didn't even give a notice, I literally just sent an email saying I wouldn't be coming in the next day, grabbed my sh*t and went home."
"I used to work Retail and after 7 years at the company, I found out I was only making 50 cents more an hour than someone who just started yesterday. I understood if they couldn't pay me more and asked for a good schedule. 7-3 or 8-4 every day and the same two days off every week. I didn't even ask for weekends off."
"I was told that they couldn't give me a good schedule so I quit."
Situations weren't much different outside the work place. Social dilemmas prompted these Redditors to say, "nope."
"Went to a pub because a friend kept asking. When I got there, he was with a group of people I didn't know, so I introduced myself and got the next round. As I come back with the tray, I hear them saying something along the lines of 'why is that b*tch still here? I thought she was just supposed to drop off a bicycle?' 'Ya, we don't want her to come to <this other town with more pubs> and now she is drinking with us?' 'She's so dumb' *proceeds to imitate and ridicule me as I was actively listening and nodding when I was having a conversation with my friend."
"Gave the beer to random people and walked right out after saying good evening to my friend and briefly explaining I did not appreciate being tricked into being a bicycle taxi for people who hate me directly after meeting me."
A Shocking Incident
"I was on my boat fishing for bass. I casted out my line and watched the lure hit the water but the line just floated in the air. Lightning and thunder crashed and the line fell to the water. F'k this sh*t, I'm out."
"She lined my bed with broken glass put the blankets over it and I dove on in lol."
"Edit: She was violent/crazy and on drugs, was like the 20th attack I took and that made me really think lol."– MyLifeForAuir1
Ally For The Ex
"I found nudes of his ex (from ten years ago) that I’d previously asked him twice to get rid of tucked in a pair of MY socks. Our couples counselor asked why he’d kept them and he said, 'You know. In case I ever needed to blackmail her.' He said it like it was a perfectly normal and reasonable thing to plan to do. The therapist and I locked eyes and I noped the f'k out of there and moved out."
Most of these Redditors realized leaving their situation was better than dealing with the consequences of sticking around.
The latter is never a good option. Why remain in a scenario you know is already going to consume your soul?
The lesson for today is–Don't be miserable. Your sanity is worth saving.Besides, you would never know that something better awaits if you just don't get the F out.
As we enter into the summer months, people now have to decide whether or not they want their morning coffee to be hot or iced.
Lucky for them, it's delicious either way.
One could make an argument that foods that are equally delicious hot or cold are perhaps the best, or at least the most reliable.
And this can include foods which are not customarily sold both hot and cold (cold pizza anyone?).
Redditor NectarineOther4989 was curious to hear which foods people enjoy either hot or cold, leading them to ask:
"What is something that tastes good both hot and cold?"
Fresh out of the oven, or the next day!
Chocolate withstands all temperatrues
"Chocolate."Chocolate Satisfying GIF by HuffPostGiphy
Can't go wrong with fruit and pastry
"Apple pie."- Hak_Saw5000
This doesn't only apply to food
"Revenge."- pushthestartbuttonkarine vanasse revenge GIF by HULUGiphy
Let the flavor develop
"2 totally different flavors depending on warm vs cold from fridge."- nonkowledge
So many to choose from!
A matter of textural preference
"Cheese, ya fools."- eat_dontpray_loveCloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs Eating GIFGiphy
Under a hot greek sun, or during a cold winter's eve.
While there's no better smell than a batch of chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven, those eating them the next day likely aren't missing out either.