Redditor u/Slow_Koala wanted to hear from those who have been touched by the sadness of losing others to suicide. Maybe anyone reading can find some solace or a reason to reach out. Life is often unbearable and lonely but there is always a chance for life to turn around. Extinguishing your life is an extreme you can never take back. You are loved. And to those left behind it can often feel like a prison sentence that never sets you free. We all need to check in on one another more. Be kind.
People who were mentioned in someone's suicide note, what's your story?
1.
My amazing cousin killed himself when I was 16. He was 26. We found the note a few weeks later. He'd singled out immediate family members with a love / good bye note. No one else except his 4 siblings and parents. Then there was my mum, my brother, and then me at the bottom. "You're going to grow up and be amazing; you're going to be a star."
You don't know weight till your fav person in the world thinks the world of you, and that's the last thing they think before they die. And you have no idea how to live up to it. Haunting and inspiring. You don't forget it. gmewhite
2.
I was a teenager and a close friend killed herself. She wanted me to have her music collection, leather jacket, and a screenplay she wrote. Eyeletblack
3.
My mom committed suicide after finding out that her tumor was malignant, she had just lost her father a year before and her mother died in treatment for cancer,she laid everything out notes to specific people and how she wanted things done. I have always been an old soul and she planned for me to find her as I would be the reasonable person I am. But that day I was invited to try out for the debate team so I came home late..... and my little sister was the one who found her. pootiemane
4.
He just got back from Iraq - Marine. He called me up. I wasn't very close to him but we both served. Michael. We talked for about two weeks before it happened. He talked about how much he loved his Mom; his brothers in the service. I thought everything was normal - that's crap we all talk about after coming home.
He shot himself over the phone. I still can't get the sound out of my head. Navy took two weeks to send a chaplain. Then NCIS was involved.
When I returned home I found out that he had left a ruck for me. He left a rucksack for me and I couldn't do anything for him. He gave it to his parents and had asked them to give it to me. DevilsAdvocate9
5.
One of my best friend's mother committed suicide and had a little message for her two children in her suicide note. It was mostly straight down the line apologetic, and an explanation as to why.
Spinal Cancer which metastasized and it was only downhill for her. She did her taxes, paid all her bills, got all her paperwork in order. Wrote a farewell note and swallowed a bottle of painkillers.
I only managed to see a small section of the note as I was the second non-emergency person on the scene (my friend was the first), but enough to know it was her way of trying to make things as painless as possible for everyone else. Engineer_Man
6.
Best friend hung himself in his room, New Year's Day 2015 - left one note saying "I'm so sorry mum." on his bed. She found him. So he didn't mention me, but it's the same topic I suppose.
His mum and I scattered his ashes together, and she gave me a jacket and necklace of his that he always had on. Haven't taken the necklace off since, and I have a tattoo of his birthday on my arm - it really affected me heavily, and I developed bad anger issues from it all. I'm much better now though. puffpuffpoo
7.
Even though nobody was mentioned, this specific note stays close to my heart to this day.
My dad is a retired detective, and one day a few years ago he came home from work visually distraught. I usually talk to him about his day so I asked him what was wrong and he told me a young man (I think around 22) had committed suicide and the note broke his heart. I asked what it said and it read something like "Mom, Dad, I'm sorry I couldn't be stronger. I hope to see you both someday in a place that's beautiful". MikeCozzi
8.
I remember when a friend of mine for ten years died. It wasn't a traditional suicide note. He told me over Skype. I still have the conversation saved. He told me how good I was to him. he told me how I was like the angel Michael to him. He called me his brother.
I tried to stop him. I tried to contact his relatives. His sister didn't care. I still remember that night. I kinda remember him waiting for Diablo 3 to be released. He died before it did though.
I wish he was still alive. We would have laughed at the irony, Diablo 3 was @%& terrible when it came out. Oh my dear beautiful J, you would have really hated the piece of crap it was on release and we could have both laughed at the irony that you stayed alive long enough to see it. Illigard
9.
Used to know this woman, who's ex husband killed himself and used his suicide note to tell his children (6 and 8 yo) that their mummy killed him and not only was it her fault, but theirs too. And the police dealing with it had to be physically stopped by the mother from reading it to her damn kids. One of the more fucked up stories from where I live. CollaborativeKale
10.
My girlfriend killed herself a little over a year ago. We were fighting and I was planning to leave her. She sent me a message that she hoped her death weighed heavy on me for a long time while I was sleeping. She was dead in the bed next to me when I woke up. Now... regrets and nightmares. It's 4:30am. I'll go to sleep when the sun comes up, sleeping at night it's difficult. 502red428
11.
Around May two years ago, my mother tried to commit suicide and I remember finding the note after I found her. When I went to "find her" I thought she was somebody trying to break into our house so I went and grabbed a knife, it turns out the noise I heard was her body flopping against the door. I ended up being able to make sure she was okay but I think what killed me most was her note. She stated that my two sisters and I were all she had and (since we were growing up) she didn't have us anymore. She wanted to leave this world so badly. HedgeHog02
12.
I was thanked in my friends suicide note. I was with him the night he passed. I didn't know he was going to do it, he just said he was upset and wanted to meet up for a smoke and a chat.
I believe I was the last person to see him alive. It really hit me hard when I found out he had passed.
He was a good friend. We'd known each other for about a decade. Went to the same school and lived around the corner from each other. He told me his secrets that he couldn't tell his girlfriend or family. AJTwinky
13.
Not really a suicide one but a end-of-life-goodbye one. He was sick and almost got through it, but at the end with weak immune system, cold was enough to get inflammations on everything... He was almost 18. Till this day the perfect person for me. And most important of all, the only real rock i had who was there from the moment we first met. He wanted to make me laugh. He always did that. Made a few jokes. Terrible ones, dad ones. Still made me laugh, and made the pain more durable. I miss those lame jokes... hero3na
14.
It was my dad's note. Telling us boys that he is so proud of the men we've become and even just writing that now makes me cry happy and sad tears. It's been just over four years now.
He was a great dad and had such a profoundly positive impact on who I am today. Even with how it ended, I couldn't ask for a better dad. He was something else. I'm a lucky kid.
Wish he could see me now. I'm glad he knew my wife before he went. Wish he could meet my nephew.
I love you dad. I still miss the hell out of you, you ornery old hippie. You're still my hero. Thank you. For everything.
Welp, wasn't expecting that wave. Thank you. It's been a minute since I cried for him. aph0r1zm
15.
He sent me a separate note the day before he did it.
"Thanks for existing, i love you"
I just answered with "love you too, bud". I had no idea. Aenator
16.
My stepdad committed suicide when I was about 7 years old. In his letter he wrote he was lonely since my mother left him. He mentioned that he couldn't live anymore because I didn't want to see him anymore and didn't want to talk to him on the phone when he called my mother the last time. I found him hanging on my grandmother's attic where I played hide and seek with my cousin. At this time he was 3 weeks dead.
It's difficult to think about it. Even though I know I was just a child and I had my reasons (he was an alcoholic who was violent when he drank), I still feel guilty. And for that feeling I hate him. On the other hand I know he was a wreck, destroyed by his parents. But neither my mother nor I were responsible for this. littleweirdbutok
17.
No note, just a phone call to preteen me that had stayed up too late because my single-parent mother had gone out looking to score whatever pills would sate her addiction (kid me had no idea, adult me now knows it was obvious). I don't remember the call completely, but I do remember being annoyed she'd kicked me off the dialup by calling in.
She said and made me promise a bunch of things that felt very serious but also very confusing and then we hung up. Police officer knocked on the door a few hours later and everything changed. No one but me knows about that phone call, especially not my brother.
I'll be the exact same age she was, down to the hour, in roughly 500 days. I keep a countdown timer on my phone. One of the promises she made me make was to live longer than she did. Oceanis46dot1
18.
He wanted me to know he loved me. That it wasn't my fault. That I was "the best friend anyone could want or have." That I should have his car. That he thought he was going mad and was saving his brother and me from the maddness.
I showed the note to my therapist. She thinks he had schizophrenia. His Mom did.
Its been 6 years. Im still not over his death. Doubt I ever will be. DANDELIONBOMB
19.
I had lived with Craig for about eight months before he killed himself. I'd known him for four years before that. We met at a metal gig and he was a short, thin guy who almost got trampled in a mosh pit. We knew he was going a bad way as soon as he started hanging out with the group we all knew did heroin and similar regularly (maybe two months after we started living together). I tried to help him as much as I could.
There were so many nights when he got back, clearly out of his mind on whatever it was he'd been doing and he'd stay on the couch in my room instead of going to his own. He didn't like to be alone. I spent a lot of mornings cooking for him and generally making sure he was okay, but it was like shoveling snow in a blizzard. He'd just go do the same the next night. At the end of that eight months we found him in his room having overdosed. We realized it was intentional when we read his note.
A lot of it was about his family problems, his mental health and just generally how terrible he thought the world was. Then near the end was a little paragraph about me, thanking me but saying I made the decision to end his life more complicated. He asked me not to blame myself. He then rambled some more and it was clear he'd been high whilst writing it. I moved out a month later. FifthForestMonk
20.
When my stepdad, and the father of my three younger brothers killed himself last month, he didn't leave a note. What he did do (I didn't even know that was possible) was queue up three texts, so they wouldn't be received until the morning after. At exactly 8 am, all three of my brothers received a text from him.
To my two oldest brothers (19 and 17): "I love you forever. I'm sorry, I just can't live with this any longer."
To my youngest brother (13): "You are a very special boy and I'll love you forever xx".
I asked my youngest brother if it had made it better or worse. He said worse. LifeIsAKindergarten
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
Oh the 90's. What a decade.
Who knew we were in the time of revolution?!
So much happened, yet so much stayed the same.
And not decades later, so much has changed.
Who doesn't love to look back upon a decade and discuss the things that were a common part of life and are now basically obsolete?
You never know in real time.
Redditor Apart-Scalewanted to reminisce about the glory days.
They asked:
"What was normal in the 1990s but rare or non existent now?"
For me... it's Madonna having a #1 song. It can still happen, but highly unlikely.
Music
"A disc man plugged into a cassette tape with a wire to play music in your car."
freehi_5
Call Me
"Hotlines for the weather report, current time, and movie show times."
redacted_4_security
"The time and temperature phone number for my small hometown still exists to this day. Same Pre recorded voice and everything. It still advertises caller-id as an add on feature for land lines. Know who’s calling you. It’s easy and convenient with caller id. The time is x. Temperature y."
Bushelsoflaughs
Let's Chat
"Talking to your friends mom to see if they were home."
Espeon2022
"I've always thought that having to go through the parents to talk to your friends made things more controlled and respectful. Now kids can just blast each other with every thought that pops in their heads 24/7, that must make things more toxic."
RupFox
Fly Away
"When picking someone up from the airport, you could wait for them at their gate."
Facelesspirit
"When I have flights going through cities with people I know I will intentionally schedule a couple hour layover so I can go hand lunch with them and then just go through security again and board the next flight."
ItsEntsy
I'm Out
"Being unreachable."
BTW_The_Names_Marcus
"I still do this to this day. I'll go on vacation for a week and just turn the phone off, or be far enough out in the boonies that there is no cell signal whatsoever."
libra00
I wish I could put my phone down. Who knew we'd never be without them?
Let's Fandango
"Calling the movie theater or looking in the paper for movie times."
yepitsjen22
Music Library
"Keeping a binder full of CDs in your car."
PMMeUrHopesNDreams
"I once left the door on my car unlocked and came back to find my car stereo gone but not my full 100 disc binder. The stereo had completely died 2 weeks prior and I just hadn't gotten around to swapping it out yet. I just laughed."
v1ct0r326
"My car CDs were stolen in 1998. I’m still pissed."
Whatwhyohhh
Multitasking
"Pressing play and record at the same time."
MoistnSquishy
"I don't know why but this one made me feel the saddest. I guess it just snapped me back to a moment when I was bored and had no where I had to be, no where I planned to go. My life's todo list completely empty. Just me and the weird 90's dust that seemed to float around in front of sunny windows."
bannablecommentary
"Putting tape over the security tab/square so you could record over any tape you had in your collection."
candiebelle
Dial Up
"Telephone booths."
Zen_Anarch
"I had to check for the phone booth that I used the most as a teenager (not in NYC, in the beach town where I spent my summers) and it was still there in the most recent Street View! I'll have to see if it's there now when I go by tomorrow. This was where I checked in with my parents and friends circa 1990 to see what was going on. The arcade was just down the street."
superluke
And the White?
"Yellow Pages."
zekesaltspider
"I got a phone book in my mailbox the other day. First one in years. It was about the size of a Goosebumps book."
dragon_book_hoarder
Well those were the days. Weren't they?
Texas is HUGE!
Literally, it's massive. That might be why the tagline is about everything being big. Oh the metaphors of life.
Next to size is heat. Lord is it hot there.
Those are just a few of the regular Texas deets that often come to mind.
What else do others think of?
Redditor Common-Transition973 wanted to compare notes on everyone's thoughts about the Lonestar state.
They asked:
"Non Texans , what are your thoughts when you hear 'Texas?'"
I've been to Texas once. Austin. It was cute.
Shaped
"Literally just the shape of the state itself as seen from a map or something."
BirbMaster1998
All Love Baby
"I’ve been through Texas a few times and the thing that stood out to me was how much people in Texas love talking about how much they love Texas. I had a beer at the Dallas airport when I was waiting for a friends plane and it was a Budweiser bottle but instead of Budweiser the label said Texas on it."
"Diners would serve Texas shaped pancakes. Every gas station had a section for Texas swag- everything from tee shirts to shot glasses to hats to magnets and other Knick knacks."
"I’ve always found New Yorkers to be obnoxious with how much they talk about how much better they are than everyone else, but Texas is actually on another level. So, I guess when I think of Texas, I think of a bunch of people yelling 'I f**kin' love Texas'."
duh_metrius
BBQ
"Barbecue, don’t get me wrong we’ve got it here in the UK but it’s nothing like what I’ve seen from across the pond. Burnt ends, beef ribs, smoked brisket. I’ve only ever seen it on YouTube and I envy those of you who have tasted it."
LWA7299
"Honestly when I went to Texas and tried the bbq, at both that big well known place and a 'mom and pop' place that my airbnb hosts said was the best in the city. It was... Good. Like it was tasty and all, but just they way people talk about it like its some kind of religious experience or that it's just so different and unlike bbq in other countries, but it wasn't. Its still just meat + dry rub + sauce and I've had comparable bbq in London."
GDPR_Violation
No Skittles
"My Texas is essentially one of those m&m characters. I picture him with those big oval eyes and white limbs. The color of this Texas-shaped m&m is 'American flag.' He’s got a cowboy hat, a piece of wheat sticking out of his mouth, and a perfectly groomed mustache. He’s just walking around in his cowboy boots with his Ak-47 in tow. He vehemently hates the skittles."
comradekitty__
Complete Crazy
"In my native Norwegian the term 'complete Texas' means chaos or out of control."
Algorithmix9
Texas means so much in so many ways.
Perfection
"Cadillacs with giant horns on the front driven by old men in white suits with big white cowboy hats and superbly trimmed mustaches."
Spare-Cap-3152
'gone Texas'
"In my company (in a country on the opposite side of the planet from Texas), 'gone Texas' is a term used to describe a software program that has frozen up to the point where even Task Manager can't abort it. Otherwise we don't think about it very much, except perhaps with mild horror."
NinaCulotta
Taglines
"Heavyset white people with guns and large cowboy hats yelling 'DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS!'"
OhEeAyTaleSpin88
"My favorite part of 'Don’t mess with Texas’ is that comes across as this slogan about how tough and bada** Texans are, but in reality it was an effective anti-littering campaign from the department of transportation."
Extremists
"Militant Evangelicals."
skootch_ginalola
"Man, as a Muslim in a secular country, is always a ride seeing posts about republicans go on about something something shariah law, something something freedom, something Obama... And then two posts later, there's a r/nottheonion post about Texas basically being white Taliban."
Deadpotatoz
Well there is still a lot of good in Texas. You just have to dig deep.
Insects play a vital role in Earth's ecosystem.
Without insects, some plants would die and some animals would starve creating a domino effect of global famine.
That being said, June Bugs can crawl back into the pits of Hell from whence they came.
I know I'm not alone in that opinion.
Redditor aconnor105 asked:
"What insect can go straight to Hell?"
Horseflies
"Horseflies. One of those f'kers chased my car for an hour and a half."
- an_ineffable_plan
"Ah yes, the sadistic combination of a mosquito's diet and gluttony and a fly's energy and speed."
- MadQrow
"Their mouthparts are literally two knives with the blades facing outwards, when a horsefly (or deer fly, or moose fly) bites you, they’re literally ripping a hole in your skin and lapping up the blood."
- MacTechG4
"They are such a**holes. A thrown shoe when they land is surprisingly effective at taking them out."
- AcceptablyPotato
"Deploy La Chancla!"
- classicalySarcastic
Bed Bugs
"Bed bugs. If you're anything like me just the mention of them makes your skin crawl."
- My_Space_page
"The bites are bad but the paranoia is worse. Once you get them you will never trust a bed ever again."
"Every unexplained itch will make you think 'F'k, are they back?'."
- pk-starstorm
Mosquitoes
"Mosquitoes. Every single one."
- Fish_Panda
"Only few select, totally expendable species of mosquitoes feed on humans. We need to just completely exterminate those f**kers!"
- vortex1001
"Kill em all, let their mosquito god sort em out."
- Digital_Utopia
June Bugs
Vindicated! I'm not the only one who hates these things.
"June Bugs. I hate them so much. They fly right at you and are so loud! And I get embarrassed for screaming my a** off."
- Skeebou and Cupacakezzz
"1000% this. They make sitting outside in the summer in Texas after 8:00pm (when it’s actually cool enough to sit outside) completely unbearable."
- Rendogala
\u201cDamn June bugs love my pool don\u2019t they \ud83d\ude11\u201d— Stealth wolfsky\ud83c\udff3\ufe0f\u200d\ud83c\udf08 (@Stealth wolfsky\ud83c\udff3\ufe0f\u200d\ud83c\udf08) 1658326332
Cockroaches
"Cockroaches. I want to invent a laser to kill just these f'kers only. They all need to burn to ash."
- AlphaShard
"In South China we had drain cockroaches that would panic when they got caught in flash torrential rain. They make a beeline for the nearest high ground, which includes you."
"I didn't really believe it at first."
"'Hah, that cockroach looks like he's sprinting towards me. Look, he even changed direction with me. Whoa, hold on a minute mate'."
"He got to my upper chest before I managed to throw him off."
"About 2,000 of them panicked after a minor earthquake, flooding out of the drains and into the nearby shops. Yelps and colourful language followed as shop staff pelted them into the air and onto bikes/cars/pedestrians with brooms."
- mrminutehand
Earwigs
"Earwigs. Creepy a** bugs with those big a** pincers on their butt."
"And they always come out at night, get in water glasses, mailboxes...nasty things."
- Xonvoluted
\u201cThe hidden, origami-like wings of the common earwig unfold to ten times their folded size, transforming the mostly ground-dwelling insect into a super-efficient flyer [read more: https://t.co/9vtGk5Hr52] [how they served as models: https://t.co/58nfe8WhYQ]\u201d— Massimo (@Massimo) 1658138400
Fleas
"Fleas. Literally any parasitic insect."
- Recent_View6254
"This is the answer, literally just any parasite. Some actually DO have a reason to exist, but others seem like they were created for the PURPOSE of spreading diseases and pain."
- StreetIndependence62
Borers
"The Emerald Ash Borer. Has killed three massive trees on my property, and is working its way to killing every ash tree in my part of the country."
- CoffeeAndBrass
...but there seem to be a lot more we mostly hate.
Did your insect nemesis make the list?
For the life of me, I can't understand how anyone could still watch The Walking Dead. I just checked and the damn thing has had 11 seasons. 11 seasons!
Can you imagine?
People enjoy watching characters follow a set of train tracks for an entire season I guess. (For context, I made it to the beginning of the seventh season before I threw in the towel, and it was really testing my patience well before then.)
But there's so much more out there that's equally overrated. Television is the least of our problems.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor PieinHorse asked the online community,
"What is very overrated?"
"The perceived security..."
"The perceived security of most jobs."
chickenkottu
Replace jobs with locks or doors or windows and it's still true.
"Influencers."
"Influencers. I'm not sure what's more ridiculous, the fact someone believes they are an "influencer" or those who actually follow them and are influenced by said influencer."
aussie_shane
I scarcely think about them. Out of sight, out of mind.
"After owning..."
"Designer brands and bags. After owning an item from each brand, it’s really the most big waste of money people can put their money on."
ian6677
You do get what you pay for up to a certain point.
"The extra leg room..."
"First Class Airline tickets!"
"We lucked up on our last flight that we had no choice but to get first class and our company paid for it, but I can 100% say that it was NOT worth the extra $700."
"The extra leg room was nice, as I'm 6'7", but the "free cocktails" and additional food? Nah homie, I'm good."
ecallowsamoht
Was this domestic? For those short flights First Class is pretty much not worth it, but for international long haul? A lie-down bed for a 13 hour flight is worth the 2x or more price, plus the other perks.
"I prefer..."
"Casual sex. I prefer competitive sex."
[deleted]
Evolutionarily speaking, life is about competitive sex...
"Being famous..."
"Being famous must suck big time. Imagine not being able to go shopping, taking a chill walk in the park, go to the beach, supermartket, etc... without people engaging with you."
Pcostix
Say goodbye to any privacy whatsoever. No thank you.
"Spent my prime years..."
"Alcohol. Spent my prime years drinking at college and all that, still say it’s the most overrated thing in history. So many better drugs that could have prevented long and short term health issues, made things more peaceful, more efficient, more successful, and so on. The fact that it’s globally advertised every millisecond proves it’s overrated."
DFHartzell
There's nothing wrong with deciding to stop drinking (or never drinking at all) and people should not be shamed for it.
"Why?"
"Huge weddings. Why? Spend the money on something important or on a trip."
Ginger_Chick
Some people want their best day ever to be a big party with all the people they care about. But there is a crazy level of stress involved in planning a party that size.
"Being an adult."
"Being an adult. What BS is this, and why the hell did we want to be adults when we were kids?"
imunclebubba
Nah, being an adult is awesome. I wouldn't change it for the world. Freedom!
"Half of the time."
"Hot weather. Half of the time it is just horrible and you’re sweating in your clothes and the other half you’re at the beach burning alive."
patrickgall
Sorry, I'd rather it be hot than be freezing, but I'm one of those people who can never get warm.
Hey, it could be worse. We could be talking about how much Game of Thrones disappointed us (again) and how it is impossible to watch it now, a total slog, knowing where it ends up. Disappointing and overrated indeed.
Have some suggestions of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!