People Who Make Good Money And Don't Hate Their Jobs Explain What They Do For A Living
Few people earn a living doing what they love.
That's why those in the workforce call showing up for work "the grind"–which implies labor-intensive tasks for long periods of time.
However, there are situations in which employees love their jobs and don't even call their labor of love "work."
They just happen to earn money doing what they love. Who are these people? Where are these jobs?
Strangers online discovered what it's like for those who have it good when Redditor puffmonkey92 asked:
"People that don’t f'king hate their jobs and make a decent wage, what do you do?"
Those who work out in the field love the work they do.
Assessing Logs
"I work in a logyard in S Oregon. Log trucks come in and are unloaded. The load is rolled out on the ground, and I scale the logs. I measure the lengths and diameters, calculate the gross volume in board feet, and make deductions based on defects such as frost seams, insect damage, burn scars, lightning strikes, etc. I work outside, so it can be rough in the winter/summer, but it keeps me moving, and it's an interesting gig. Been doing it about 6 years now. AMA"
– Cult_Of_Cthulu
Working With Mother Nature
"National Park Ranger. Thirty-two years and counting. As with any profession, there are still bad days."
– ThndrChicken
Working in near isolation is ideal for these Redditors.
Behind The Scenes
"I work in the pathology lab at a hospital. I process blood and biopsy samples onto microscope slides for the pathologists to read. I love it! I feel like I’m helping people, even though I never meet them and they have no idea who I am."
– gobstopper84
The Happy Statistician
"I’m a statistician and work with a government agency. I particularly really enjoy not having to interact with too many people."
– sundried_potato
Reliable Computer Expert
"I am the only IT guy for a family owned business. They know nothing about computers so as long as everything is running smoothly they leave me alone. I only put in about 45 minutes of actual work every week."
– tablefor1please
Movie-Watching All Day
"I’m a colorist. It’s like photoshop for movies. I love it. But I feel very lucky to have this job, and to be successful in the industry."
– manatwork3543
Tidying Up
"I work as a housekeeper at a motel. I love my job. It allows me to work alone, I can listen to my music, and I enjoy making order out of chaos. Also, the money's pretty damn good. Because of the way our pay is structured, I make more than double the standard amount in this industry."
– MotherOfNerds855
Some people prefer working in customer service, depending on the job.
Joy Of Seeing Satisfied Customers
"Electrician. It’s hard work most days, but satisfying seeing it all lit-up and functioning properly."
"Knowing my work will still be in service many years from now feels good, and seeing customers marvel at their new light fixtures looking great is a good feeling."
– You11NeverKn0w
Low Stress
"I work at a pet store (only supplies, no animal sales) and make $18 CAD/hr. That might not sound 'decent' but it's better than minimum wage with no meaningful increase in responsibility (aka stress) compared to any other retail worker. In fact, my work environment is lower stress than any other retail/food job I've had and the owner has a keen interest in our well-being. Yearly raises, Christmas bonus, profit sharing, get paid our full scheduled shift if it's shortened or cancelled for weather, aiming to become a living wage employer with promises to increase wages beyond that so long as the business continues to grow."
"Plus no one asks 'why' if I turn down a shift or decline to stay later. Respect for personal time is huge. I'm treated like a human being, not a robot with no life outside work."
– creepmachine
Keywords: Security & Freedom
"I’m an accountant for a bank."
"Good salary, great benefits, tons of PTO and all holidays off."
"It’s not particularly exciting, rewarding, or fulfilling but it gives me the security and freedom to make my life as exciting, rewarding and fulfilling as possible."
– Reddit
Playtime
"I am a kennel attendant. I care for and feed both dogs and cats. One of my daily requirements if I have time to do it, is literally to play with a dog/cat or puppy/kitten. It’s called animal enrichment. It’s meant to help prepare them for a life outside the shelter. Doesn’t even feel like a job."
– RathGodofWar
Based on the responses above, it's not unusual for people to find jobs that are fulfilling and make decent wages.
Unfortunately, many workers end up feeling stuck at their jobs because they are settling, but for good reason: the reasonable salary.
But if they're unhappy in spite of a good living wage, is that really the kind of life that's worth living?
There are always better alternatives. If you want to be unstuck, taking a leap of faith is very rewarding.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained right? Go out there and find your dream job!
People Describe The Most Historically Significant Event They've Ever Witnessed In Person
Reddit user FictionVent asked: 'What is the most historically significant event you witnessed IN PERSON?'
Do you ever wonder what it must've been like to experience major events throughout world history when reading about them in text books?
But if you take pause and actually think about it, we're living through many newsworthy current events that succeeding generations will be talking about long after we're gone.
Reading about them online or in newspapers is one thing. But seeing them happen unfold before our eyes is another.
"What is the most historically significant event you witnessed IN PERSON?"
People recall the natural disaster events they've witnessed.
Tremors
"1964 Good Friday Earthquake 9.2 Richter. Was a boy in Cordova, Alaska at the time."
– KitchenLab2536
"My father was skipper of the USCG cutter stationed there. He was inport, and when the quake struck shortly before 5:30pm, he and my mom gathered me and my three siblings on the front porch. At first, it felt like the house was crumbling at the foundation, but on the porch we could plainly see our whole world was shaking. I remember watching telephone poles swaying, and the wires snapping and crackling in the street. The quake lasted about five minutes initially. My dad got his ship underway to avoid the tidal wave which was sure to come. We had several aftershocks in the coming weeks, some of which were quite strong, though nowhere near as strong or as long as the quake itself. I was seven at the time."
– KitchenLab2536
Collapsing Freeway
"October 17th, 1989. I watched the 880 Nimitz freeway collapse during the San Francisco earthquake. The Honda in front of me had the upper deck crush her front-end engine compartment. The mother and her daughter were shaken up but completely fine."
"I was driving a convertible Triumph Spitfire, which was scratched up slightly from debris. However, I walked away unscathed. Aside from the fact I pissed my pants, which I didn't notice until much later."
– CatDaddyWhisper
Thar She Blows
"I sat on the roof of our house and watched Mt. St. Helens erupt less than 100 miles away."
– stinkykitty71
"This must have been fascinating and terryfing in equal measure. What a thing to witness."
– runrossyrun
"It was amazing! The ash that covered everything like snow was interesting to kid me, but less so to my parents."
– stinkykitty71
People recall seeing major catastrophes as a result of malfunctions or judgement errors.
Bomber Crash
"The b-52 crash that led to changing what large military aircraft are allowed to do for airshows."
"I didn't see the plane, but immediately saw the fireball. It was just a perfect, bright red turning to black mushroom cloud."
"Fairchild is a nuclear air base and there were a few minutes there where I was sure the world was about to end."
"A few years before a KC-135 doing the same thing crashed near the school while we were in class."
– goffstock
Tragic Takeoff
"I was standing on my front porch watching the launch of the Challenger."
– StarChaser_Tyger
"Was riding in my parents car to a basketball game in the next town over in north texas when we saw a shooting star and thought that was neat."
"It was the Columbia..."
– Misdirected_Colors
Demolition Gone Wrong
"The failed implosion of the Zip feed mill in Sioux Falls, SD in 2005."
"They hyped it up, sold tickets to it, had a big 'BOOM' marketing thing, and broadcast it live on TV."
"The explosives took out the main supports on the first floor, and the rest of the building above it just plopped down 10ft or so and came to a rest. It was a massive failure, and was a funny little blurb on news stations around the world that day. Definitely not major news, just the rest of the world taking 20 seconds to laugh at us."
"The building sat like that (the leaning tower of SuFu) for quite a while until they figured out how to safely demolish it."
"Here's a clip of the failed demolition."
– KitchenBandicoots
These well-known historical events were seen by very few who are alive today.
Historical Remnant
"The tumbling of the Wall in Germany… along with people selling bits and pieces of it on tables in lobby in front of commissary and px in the following weeks and months. I had picked up a chunk about the size of an oreo and kept it… has blue spray paint on the flat side. Wonder if anyone is buying them now?"
– SingedPenguin13
Major Upheaval
"I would have to say the LA riots. I lived about two blocks from where it started. I was on my way home from school and saw someone throw a brick through a window. I didn’t even wait. I just started running the whole way home."
– Scarlaymama0721
Day Of Infamy
"9/11, I could SMELL the collapse of the towers."
– go4tli
"A friend of mine was there. One day in the warehouse we worked in together there was an odd electrical burning smell. He stopped in his tracks and went 'this is what 9/11 smelled like.'"
– mantistoboggan287
I didn't physically witness the fall of the World Trade Center but I was living in New York City at the time.
However, I did see the smoke.
I was living up north in Washington Heights at the time and knowing what happened, uncertain of what was to come, and seeing the plumes of smoke from the attack site was the most ominous sight I've ever seen in my life to date.
Have you ever lived through a historic moment or witnessed something sure to be noted in history books? Let us know in the comments below.
Many weddings involve months of planning and thousands of dollars.
But the one guarantee in life is that poo happens and weddings are not immune to sh*t storms.
Natural disasters, unexpected illnesses, accidents or animosity can derail even the best laid wedding plans.
Reddit user NickWhite566 asked:
"What happened to those who had attended a botched wedding?"
Hunger Games
"Went to a Pig Roast wedding in a rural setting, 120 people, huge field, right by the river."
"I looked at the one pig roasting and thought to myself 'They must have the other pigs roasting elsewhere to keep the smoke down'—NOPE only one pig for 120 people."
"We were the first table to line up after the head table—and the pig was already 1/3 gone—they ran out at about table 5 of 20 tables."
"I ate then sat back an watched the fallout. One of the groomsmen was my good friend and I casually said 'Should throw the groom in the river for this kind of f**k up'."
"Groom was promptly thrown in the river—that kinda thing happens when people drink on empty stomachs."
~ collectivedisagree
Stone Cold
"A few years ago, my cousin was getting married. The man she was marrying was perfect for her. I was jealous. I wanted something like they had."
"Anyway, the day of the wedding comes and her maid of honor (bride's sister) and her soon to be husband are nowhere to be found."
"Well, she's waiting in the church and one of the groomsmen comes in with a hand written letter from the fiancé."
"Turns out the maid of honor (her sister) and her fiancé have been sleeping together for a while, she's pregnant, and they ran off to Vegas to get married."
"So, no wedding."
~ ServiceCall1986
Change of Venue
"I attended a wedding where they held the ceremony and reception at this renovated historic house. During the reception though, police were called because apparently the 'venue' wasn't actually permitted to be a business."
"It was just some people's house that they kept renting out to weddings to the immense annoyance of their neighbors (and subsequently the police)."
"One of the house owners actually ended up being arrested because they had already been given a 'last warning' at the previous wedding the weekend before, and the dude was getting belligerent."
"Most of the reception was done by that point anyway, but it sure was chaotic as we were all shooed out, trying to call like 50 Ubers while the cops made sure we left."
~ ShrimpHeavenAngel
Brrrr... 🥶
"I attended an outdoor wedding."
"In December."
"All the guests assumed there would be shelter/heating but nope—nothing was provided."
"All us guests were freezing cold. Some got drunk as fast as they could and others kept asking the staff for cups of tea, not to drink but to hold the warm cups."
"It was awful."
~ ErodeMode
Tragic
"Went to the wedding of one of my husband's close friends and everything was going wonderful until about 3 hours in when the bride's grandma becomes unresponsive."
"We were sitting right next to that table when she falls to the floor not breathing. Our other friend (an EMT) ended up performing CPR on her until the paramedics came."
"He said he felt her ribs cracking under his hands."
"The wedding promptly ended as the bride and groom go to the hospital with grandma. She passed away in the hospital that night after an emergency surgery."
~ blondie5697
Not What They Ordered
"My wife and I watched in horror as the wedding planner proceeded to get very sloppily drunk and exceedingly outlandish behavior."
"It came crashing to an end when she started dancing/grinding on the father of the bride with his wife and the bride a few feet away staring in shock."
"Lots of shouting and then the groomsmen not so kindly escorted her out."
~ uni-monkey
Father of the Bride
"I was the photographer."
"The bride was very close to her stepfather, and her father had not been in the picture for a lot of her life, but he was invited to the wedding and they did two father-daughter dances so he wasn't left out or anything."
"He was also supposed to pay for part of the photos, and he just showed up with no money. He eventually got mad, like she was doing something wrong by including the stepdad, who raised her and paid for most of the wedding (and for that matter, her upbringing)."
"She spent like an hour crying in the back and eventually an uncle offered to pay for some of what the dad owed."
"I knocked off $100 and stayed an extra hour for free so we could get all the photos we would have done during that hour, but it was obviously not the same for her."
"Then the dad spent weeks harassing me to send him the photos I took because she wouldn't send them to him. (I didn't, obviously)."
~ LizardPossum
Noped Out
"The Bride said NO at the altar. Literally walked back down the aisle and out the door."
"The groom stood for a moment and then went to a side room. The minister followed the groom, then came back and said that while the wedding was off, the reception would go forward since the food was already there.
"Awkward reception and nobody stayed long after eating."
"They were getting married because the bride was pregnant, and they thought it was the right thing to do. She decided that pregnancy was not a good reason to marry after all."
"She had the baby and they ended up raising the child together, although not as a romantic couple."
~ Lulinda726
Worst Man
"I used to have a friend who owned a small hotel which operated primarily as a wedding venue. They lived in one of the hotel rooms, so all of the events taking place in the courtyard directly outside their door could be heard very clearly."
"We were hanging out one night during a wedding and listening to the speeches, the most notable of which was the best man speech during which he told the story of having a threesome with both the bride and groom at Burning Man, and heavily alluded to still being in love with the groom."
"Lots of older relatives in attendance."
"The place went silent and the wedding ended about two hours early."
~ Chapsy_
Get Him to the Church on Time
"I was a bridesmaid in my brother's wedding. Day of the wedding we are all getting ready as you normally would. I'm in the bridal suite area; everything is going fantastically."
"The church is filled to capacity with guests. We all walk down the aisle and take our places, bridesmaids and groomsmen alike. My soon-to-be SIL is walking down the aisle on her father's arm. My brother is nowhere in sight."
"There is a long, awkward pause as my SIL is standing in front of a packed church, and we are all just looking at each other. Everyone is assuming the worst—that my brother has skipped out at the altar and left her."
"I'm shout whispering to the Best Man 'where is he'eandk he says 'I don't know". My mom is nearly having a heart attack."
"My dad finally gets up goes to the room where my bro was supposed to be waiting and comes out with my brother. My brother says 'Where's the minister, I was waiting on him'."
"My bro hadn't left at all, the minister was a no-show!"
"He was supposed to be waiting with my bro and walk out with him, or tell him when it was time to walk out while groomsmen were lining up to escort bridesmaids down the aisle. Because no one had checked in on my bro after getting ready no one knew the minister wasn't there."
"At this point, we are all standing in a group at the front of the church; the majority of the church guests still don't know what is going on, just that my bro had to be summoned, and there are angry looks all around."
"My dad realizes he needs to let them in on what's going on, so he announces to the guests, 'We can't find the pastor, is anyone here licensed?' but of course no one is. The bride's father calls the minister on his cell phone, on speaker so the whole church can hear the conversation."
"'Hi Pastor Denny, where are you? Did you forget what today was? Yes Denny, the wedding. The wedding is right now. We are all waiting on you at the church. Ok we'll just wait here then'."
"Turns out the pastor was playing golf and had put the wedding date down as the following weekend in his planner."
"I then ask my soon-to-be SIL if she wants us to walk back down the aisle and come back in or what. She says at this point 'forget it we are all here' so we just stand around and wait for Pastor Denny and try to make jokes with the wedding guests but it's pretty awkward as no one really knows what to do."
"After about 15 minutes Pastor Denny comes running into the church in his golf clothes—polo shirt/funny shorts etc...—apologizes and goes immediately into the vows."
"My poor SIL was furious that day, first thinking my bro had ditched her at the altar then at the fact that the minister had ditched them."
"She laughs about it now but it was a tense ceremony."
~ GreedyReality9815
Party!
"It was my very first friend to get married: a girl I’d known in high school. We were 24, 25. Classic rom-com nightmare scenario where the groom had second thoughts the day of and just bolted."
"We all just milled around for a while, not sure what to do. Awful vibes, the bride’s mom was weeping hysterically."
"Me and some friends were finally making our way to the exits, and the bride stopped us, like 'where the f**k do you think you’re going? You guys are taking me out to a bar right this minute, and you’re gonna have to carry me out of there.”
"So we did—mostly the young people, though a few stray aunts and uncles came along, including a few of the groom’s relatives who were like, 'he’s a little punk anyway, you’re better off without him'.”
"We all got unfathomably drunk, sang karaoke, glasses were shattered, the bride hit on literally every man there including me (though no one took her up on it, that would have been weird)."
"There were a rough few months in store for her afterward, but that ended up being a hell of a party. I can still feel the hangover a decade later."
"Bride married a guy who actually showed up several years later. I think they’re happy."
"No idea about the groom—that was the last time any of us really spoke about him."
~ Nerazzurro9
Surprise?
"My family was invited to what we thought was an engagement party. My aunt had reserved a room at a local restaurant for about 50 people."
"Turns out it was my cousin's wedding. So no one brought a gift or dressed up at all. Bride is in a wedding dress and groom is wearing jeans."
"We ordered food and drinks. The officiant does his thing while waiters are bringing in drinks and appetizers. Finally over and we get to eat."
"But when the officiant asked for the marriage license so they can all sign it, my cousin and his new wife just stared at him confused."
"They didn't know they had to get one!"
"Thought just having a wedding was enough. They were in their late 20s."
"So wedding, but no marriage. They never did 'officially' get married and he ran off a few years later to another state to be with some girl he met online."
~ msao2009
Sick Day
"Friend's wedding. A bunch of people got food poisoning at the rehearsal dinner. Including the groom."
"He spent the night at the ER getting fluids and medication to stop puking. This was an awesome high-end wedding and he almost cancelled."
"He was a pale green color and basically sipped Gatorade all day and got through it. He married his high school sweetheart and they have been married 30+ years."
~ Caspers_Shadow
Fill In
"The best man choked on a piece of steak. I didn’t see it happen but I guess someone performed the Heimlich. It came out, anyway."
"They called an ambulance (you always should go to hospital! Even if obstruction is removed) and he left."
"Another groomsman did an impromptu speech in his place, which was brave of him. He started off with 'I guess (best man) bit off more than he could chew with that role'."
~ rescueruby
Have you ever been invited to a wedding that didn't happen the way it was planned?
Share your story in the comments.
When we're in pain or scared, we're not on our best behavior.
We've got more important things on our minds than proper etiquette.
Couple our lowered inhibitions with the bizarre amalgam that is the human body and weirdness is bound to happen in hospital waiting rooms.
Reddit user IAmAsianHearMeRoar asked:
"What did you see happen in the hospital waiting room?"
Feline Friend
"A cat walked in once."
"Shamelessly caught everyone's attention."
"Maybe due to how long we were kept waiting, but a few of us jumped at the chance to grab the cats' attention."
"I’m excited to see a cat every time I see a cat."
"I own three cats. Or they own me, whatever."
~ Accomplished-Fee3846
"I’ve worked in the vet field 3 years, have my own cat and I’m always excited to see a cat. I love cats!"
~ kxiyaz
YTA, Dude
"Watched a guy fake passing out so he didn’t have to wait, since there were a lot of people waiting."
"A**hole winked at me as he was wheeled back on a gurney."
~ Tangboy50000
Don't Do This
"I once saw a guy cut himself with a piece of broken glass just to be seen sooner by the nurses during triage."
~ Shamanofthealike1
Going Up
"I had taken the elevator down from an appointment at one of the hospital's smaller buildings, my young children in tow."
"When the elevator reached the bottom floor, I realized immediately that there was a very purple elderly man lying between us and the exit, surrounded by medical professionals performing CPR on him."
"I closed the elevator door and rode back up before the kids noticed anything and we hung out in the waiting room until the ambulance had pulled away. Got my first CPR certification a few weeks later."
~ merganzer
Look Away
"I was in the emergency waiting room with my Mom."
"I was the one with an emergency and was drowsy the whole time, but I remember that at some point a man was wheeled into the room while making throat noises (think The Grudge) and my Mom took my face in her hands and told me, very calmy and without an inch of panic in her voice, to look through the window and tell her what that weird tree was because she'd never seen one like that (she definitely had)."
"I had no idea what was going on so I kept staring at that tree, and then it was my turn so we left the waiting room."
"Days later she told me that the man who was wheeled into the room had one of his legs hanging on for dear life and that there was blood everywhere on his pants, but also on his clothes."
"He was drunk so he probably had a fight. I hope he's okay now."
"My Mom is the best. She was worried and didn't want me to see this. So she took in the sight but protected me from it. Sometimes, I think we don't deserve Moms."
~ Magomaeva
HIPAA!
"My doctor hired her son to be a receptionist."
"He announced a woman’s STD tests in the lobby."
"He didn’t work there long."
~ gothiclg
Brains...
"I was sitting in the ER waiting room and this young couple comes in. The man pushing his girlfriend in a wheelchair."
"She’s barely conscious, slumped over and pale."
"As the boyfriend is checking her in, she wakes ups and Exorcist-style projectile vomits onto the floor. Nurses rush her back."
"The boyfriend then sits down and not a minute passes before out of nowhere he does the same!"
"Everyone waiting slapped masks on real quick once that happened."
~ Silent_Push_1413
"This is how zombie apocalypses always start."
~ Maxwyfe
An All Beet Diet?
"I went to the ER with a kidney stone and there was an old couple sitting across from me probably in their 60’s or 70’s."
"The lady was bickering to the man complaining about how long they’ve been there. The only thing is that this woman was completely purple."
"Like all of her face and head was this dark purple. She didn’t appear to be in any pain but my f*ck was she ever purple."
~ PewpyDewpdyPantz
The Circle of Life
"Like 20 years ago waiting in the ER I see a guy dressed up as a full monkey being wheeled on a stretcher past a large doorway and then 3 other monkeys following him."
"They were performers from the live Lion King show at Disney Animal Kingdom."
~ FLcitizen
Holiday Cheers 🍻
"I work as a nurse in the emergency, I’ve seen some crazy things."
"Once while security was busy doing two separate take downs, an old guy dressed up like Santa unzipped his backpack and started handing out beers to everyone in the waiting room."
~ Best_Lead_632
"So what you’re telling me is Santa’s real???"
~ aggressively_baked
DIY
"Once upon a time I was waiting on news of a friend who'd been in an accident."
"I saw a guy (about early twenties) come in with him mom because he'd fallen off of his roof and dislocated his shoulder. After about an hour of waiting his mom just says 'F*ck it! This is taking too long!' and legit began to Google how to reset a shoulder."
"After about 5 mins of research, she took off her belt, folded it up and told him to bite down on it. She then proceeded to violently shove her son's shoulder back into the socket while he naturally screamed in agony."
"Security and nurses rush over to see what the commotion is and more or less need to pull her off of him. Security sits her down and the nurses take the poor kid and get him treated."
~ August-Dawn
Our Robot Overlords
"I watched a robot filing cabinet press the elevator button and guide itself to a different area of the hospital."
~ jessieisokay
"We have these at my hospital. They even dress them up. Handy little robots help us transport non-emergent meds, lab samples, and equipment."
~ mrsfisk
"I wish our robots could do that."
"Instead, we have 4 delivery robots that all need a person to follow them and put them on and take them off of the elevators."
"Or we could just, y'know, hand the meds to the person and not take 38 minutes to get it there."
~ aurelius92a
True (Toxic) Love
"Girl trying to get admitted to the mental health unit, turns out her boyfriend was a patient. She didn't get admitted, she wasn't happy about it but she left."
"Next thing we know there's a car doing donuts just outside of the ER entrance, she was throwing things out the window and screaming 'Am I crazy enough now?'."
"She ends up driving around to the other side of the hospital and driving right through some sliding glass doors."
"She's lucky she didn't kill someone—another 10 feet and she would have crashed over a railing and into the cafeteria below, where staff was napping on a couch."
"Definitely got carted away, but not to where she wanted to go."
"Thing is her boyfriend wasn't even in that hospital; there's a small mental health inpatient unit, but her boyfriend was in a completely separate mental health facility about 15 km away."
"This was right in the heart of the pandemic, when building materials were really hard to come by, and so the entrance that she drove through ended up being closed for about 6 months."
~ beachmonkeysmom
People going to the hospital are in crisis most of the time.
It's to be expected that the unexpected is bound to happen.
People Share Signs To Tell Whether A Friend Has A Good Marriage
No matter how good it might be, no relationship is 100% perfect 100% of the time.
On the contrary, there are some relationships that seem pretty doomed to fail, and it's disheartening how many signs we can spot of the relationship coming apart, perhaps even before the couple themselves is aware of it.
But as clear as a sign of trouble might be, it can feel impossible to talk to a loved one about it when it's about their relationship.
Redditor AnitaDeckenme123 asked:
"What are some signs that your married friend doesn't have a good marriage?"
All Joking Aside
"Talking s**t about their spouse, even if it’s in a joking way, is a clear sign to me. I went to a bachelor party with a bunch of guys I didn’t know and they spent the entire time b***hing about their wives, and they all sounded miserable."
- FunctionBuilt
Desperate to Hide the Truth
"They are withdrawn or secretive. If your friend is suddenly withdrawn or secretive, it may be a sign that they are having problems in their marriage."
- LiaRipsx
Weird Gestures to "Mark Their Territory"
"His hang glider now has a full-sized graphic of his spouse holding the cat on it. And he wasn't asked beforehand."
- BarcodeNinja
Hypothetical Divorces
"They talk about divorce hypothetically."
- LaximumEffort
"Okay, but what if, say, I am watching a lot of true crime murder shows, and he tells me we can just get a divorce instead of me killing him? Does that count? Lol (laughing out loud)."
- HopefulKitty
Detached Relationship
"When they don’t care what the other person is doing or where they are. Basically, two people who live separate lives and live like roommates."
- Lucyinthesky
"My friend never says anything bad about her husband, but she also doesn't speak about him much at all. They’ve been married less than a year, but she's said things like not caring what he's up to a couple of times, and it made me wonder if that was normal in marriage. It feels wrong."
- happinessinasong88
Fighting in Public
"I’ve known two different couples that off and on fought a lot around me at certain points, which isn’t obviously a great sign."
"The fighting stopped, but what I realized after a while that may be worse is that they didn’t interact at all unless absolutely necessary."
"I’m mostly oblivious, so it took my wife pointing it out to notice that both of these couples never really talk to each other besides mandatory stuff like plans or the kids."
"No casual conversations, no eye contact, no touching each other; literally no interaction that’s not necessary for the family to function."
"I suppose it’s better than fighting in public, but it’s kind of weird once you notice it."
- non_clever_username
Social Media Cover Stories
"If they're plastering social media with how HAPPY they are, and they're SO IN LOVE, and THEY'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER, that's a sure sign that things are in the process of going sideways."
- wilderlowerwolves
"This confuses me SO much. I have two close friends (women) who have been texting me nonstop about how s**tty their significant others are, like going OFF about them, long voice messages, etc."
"Then between messages, I will open Facebook and see they just made a post about how much they love their partner with a cute picture and tons of hearts and s**t."
"Like... WHAT. I have never called them out, but what the h**l?"
- perfectdrug659
"Gah, my BIL (Brother-in-Law) divorced after a short two-year marriage, and this was the prime indicator of knowing that they were doomed."
"They did this kissy cutesy schmoopy lovey-dovey thing in public, and the worse their relationship got, the more publicly showy they were about showing how in love they were. It was horrific to watch unfold."
- abqkat
Controlling and Jealous Behavior
"In my experience, going out with my old homie that was married, I couldn't ever post us out at the bar or anything. If his wife saw it, she’d blow her top apparently."
"We went out for my 23rd birthday a couple of years ago and merely his elbow was in the video of me sipping on whatever drink I had. In a panic, he urged that I delete it before his wife saw it for whatever reason."
"They’re divorced now."
- jailbreakthetesla_
Mean to Their Partner
"When their identity is the 'person who is mean to their spouse.'"
"I was at a party this weekend and there was a woman who just bad-mouthed her husband and talked about how nice it was to be away from him and the kids for the night. That’s like her shtick… she talks about how her kids and husband are s**tty. It’s such a gross personality, and it’s relatively common. It shouldn’t be common at all."
- SpacemanPete
Flirting Elsewhere
"They flirt a lot. A lot of unhappily married people I know are quick to flirt with anyone who seems interested because they want to feel that spark again."
- FlatulentDwarf
Constant Check-Ins
"When one of them is out and their spouse does not stop calling them."
- BansheeShriek
"I can't imagine living like that. I took a 10-day road trip to the beach alone, and all my husband asked of me was to keep my location turned on in case of an accident, and text a few times a day so he knew I was alive. That's trust."
- HopefulKitty
The Depression or Glow Up Era
"If they suddenly seem really down on themselves or stop taking care of themselves for seemingly no reason, If their outlook on relationships and/or marriage had changed since getting married, If they have nothing good to say about their partner or just don't talk about them..."
"The list goes on."
- Misspent_interlude
"Or reverse, they start glowing up. They lose weight, focus on appearance more, it means they're getting ready to split."
- Alternative-Post-937
Wishful Widows
"When my husband died, some friends admitted that they were a little jealous."
- emmymcd
"My ex-husband responded, 'One can only hope,' and looked at me when he heard someone’s wife died."
- foldinthecheese89
"I would never say this to someone, but I understand the sentiment. I absolutely wished my ex-husband dead a handful of times. It's one of those things where you can't leave because I had very little money of my own and staying meant living with abuse."
- IsThatBlueSoup
Jealous of Working Relationships
"It's bad when you avoid or feel guilty talking about how happy you are or about the nice and thoughtful things that your partner does because you know your friend can't relate."
- anemic_girlfriend
"Yikes. This is how I am with a friend group of mine. They’re always complaining about their husbands, and I stay silent. I don’t want to rub it in that I love my husband and he’s mostly awesome. In the past two years, one has gotten divorced and another is on her way there."
- Nonny70
"It gets weird for me when people are like, 'Must be nice to get away from the wife' if I'm on a work trip or something."
"I don't understand. I sleep better when my wife's next to me, I feel better about the day when I get to see her and talk to her, she makes me smile all the damn time."
"Everybody on the planet is a very distant second on my list of people I want to be around, and even though we do plenty of things separately I don't see time apart as some sort of reprieve from her presence."
- HereToTheSquatch
Wishing They Were Out
"I got married young and a lot of older guys gave me s**t for it, like they resented their wives for settling down too soon. It upsets me when men talk s**t about their wives. If you hate your wife, then leave, she’s probably better off without you."
"My wife is my best friend. Seven years later, our relationship only grows stronger over time. If you love someone and they love you back, be grateful for that and show it!"
- Apprehensive-Hall254
There are many ways to tell that a relationship is in a downward spiral, especially when the relationship is not our own.
But these accounts were intense and ones that we can only hope are less common.