Mixed Metaphors

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Malaphor: an informal term for a blend of two or more aphorisms, idioms, or clichés

Malaphors, also known as mixed metaphors, can become almost as common in pop culture as the original sayings they co-opt. Like "It's not rocket surgery."

Or they can happen on the spur of the moment, when someone can't quite remember how a saying is supposed to go.

Here is a collection of amusing malaphors, with the original idioms they're based on.

Don't rain on my thunder.

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Don't rain on my parade.

Don't steal my thunder.

A bird in the hand is worth one stone.

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A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

Killing two birds with one stone.

You've made your bed, now eat it.

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You've made our bed, now lie in it.

You've made your dinner, now eat it.

Beauty is in the eye of the tiger.

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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

It's the eye of the tiger.

It's all fun and games until the bird gets the worm.

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It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt.

The early bird gets the worm.

This came back to haunt me in the a$$.

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This came back to haunt me.

This came back to bite me in the a$$.

You can't make an omelette without breaking a leg.

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You can't make an omelette without breaking some eggs.

Break a leg.

That train has sailed.

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That train has left the station.

That ship has sailed.

There's no use crying over my dead body.

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There's no use crying over spilled milk.

...over my dead body.

Rome wasn’t burnt in a day.

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Rome wasn't built in a day.

Fiddling while Rome burned.

The grass is always greener 'til the cows come home.

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The grass is always greener on the other side.

...'til the cows come home.

You can break it but you can't buy happiness.

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You break it, you bought it.

You can't buy happiness.

Better late than sorry, I guess.

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Better late than never.

Better safe than sorry.

Let's not beat around the dead horse.

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Let's not beat around the bush.

Stop beating a dead horse.

Does the pope sh!# in the woods?

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Is the Pope Catholic?

Does a bear sh!# in the woods?

Looks like the upper hand is on the other foot!

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Getting the upper hand.

Looks like the shoe is on the other foot.

Fool me once, shame on you. But teach a man to fool me and I'll be fooled for the rest of my life.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for the rest of his life.

Sh!# or get out of the kitchen.

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Sh!# or get off the pot.

If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen.

If life gave you lemmings, would you jump off a cliff?

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

...like lemmings to the sea.

Would you jump off a cliff is all your friends did?

You Can Lead All Your Chickens Into One Cart But They Can't Pull Your Horse Behind It

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.

Don't count your chickens before they're hatched.

Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

Don't put the horse before the cart.