People Reveal The Creepiest Thing They've Ever Whispered To Someone

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A first handshake can define a relationship. What better way to christen it than a totally inappropriate, creepy comment?

quiksilver590 asked What's the creepiest thing you can whisper in someone's ear while shaking their hand?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.

Yeah this is pretty creepy.

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"Wait... don't let go just yet." Subtle. Weird. Unusual. Needy.

Wanna know where my hands have been?

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Your hand feels as soft as I always imagined it would.

The sweet release of your touch...

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Don't say anything. Just inhale very deeply and loudly and go "aaahhhhhhh" on the exhale.

Nothing is real, your life is a lie.

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Get two of your friends, space yourselves out about 2-3 minutes apart at walking speed. Pick a random stranger walking the right way. Stroll past them; "You need to wake up." Have your friend walk past a few minutes later; "We miss you." Next friend; "Please wake up."

Sounds like a typical weekend to me.

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You're not going to remember any of this.

Show me using my hand.

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Guess where this hand was just a moment ago?

Don't blink.

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Your body will do well enough. This body is getting tiresome.


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They can get in line tbh.

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Don't go home tonight. They are waiting for you.

This is how we mate on my home planet.

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Don't say anything. Take your middle finger and stroke it back and forth. I recommend you try this immediately because it is the worst feeling.

I could just eat you up.

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Just make a slurping noise.

And you know this, how?

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You smell different when you're awake.

A great way to break any silence.

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Farts loudly.

I've been dreaming of this moment.

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"I will never wash this hand again." - Best said with a faltering, breathy voice.

Sigh, just make it quick.

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I bet you didn't realize you told your family goodbye for the last time today.

You're... welcome?

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Thank you for your sacrifice.

Bow before me then, betch

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You get me closer to God.

But I'm going to take my time.

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You won't feel a thing, I promise.


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If you or a loved one has been diagnosed with mesothelioma you may be entitled to compensation.

No, I love it, rub it all over.

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Don't you just hate it when you pee on your hands?

Any chance you could keep it to yourself?

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Any chance you know how to get rid of ringworm?

Some of us speak fluent feline.

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Just meow at them.

I'm not desperate or anything though.

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Mmm, you'll do.

Let me be real for a second.

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