People Who've Had A Threesome With Their Significant Other Confess How It Affected Their Relationship
Sex is something that should be passionate and intense and fun. And though it's been said it was an activity designed for two, adding a few characters to the story isn't a bad thing. As long as all the participants are stable enough to handle the situation why not experiment away. Just make sure it's all the right pieces to fill the puzzle.
Redditor u/eltroopay wanted to hear from those who have dabbled with others in their relationships by asking... People who have agreed to have a threesome with their partner and another person, how did it get agreed upon and how did it go?
it didn't live up to the hype,
I've been in two threesomes: The first time, it was with two "friends" that later on turned out not to be very great friends. I don't talk to either of them anymore. The threesome itself was.. well, it didn't live up to the hype, if I'm putting it nicely.
The second time was with my boyfriend and a close mutual friend. The close mutual friend had recently broken up with his girlfriend when I got a Facebook message from him: Basically it said something along the lines of "I've got something to ask you, I was wondering if you'd be down for a threesome?". I asked with who, and he said "You and Tyler (my boyfriend), I haven't asked him yet I figured I'd ask you first". I said it was okay, brought it up with my boyfriend and he said it was okay, too. We did it that night and it was a million times better than the first one. princess_bvmblebee
Happy Birthday!!!
My SO arranged a threesome with her visiting college roommate (who I had some sexual experience with in college) as my gift for my 30th birthday. They made all the arrangements between themselves and surprised me with it. I was a little reluctant at first, thinking it was some sort of test. I gradually agreed to it. It was fun. It ended up being a few days of sex and nakedness. It is very unlikely to ever be repeated. picksandchooses
Oh Natural....
I've done a few but I'll just mention the first. We didn't plan it out at all, or agree to it, it was just natural for both of us. We went to a nude beach together. There ended up being only three people there, us and a very attractive middle aged military guy (we were 22). We hung out in the sun together all day and got to know each other and smoked some weed. When you're young and hanging out in the sun nude, it's easy to get horny.
Eventually, I don't remember who, made the first move. It just progressed really naturally. We had some really great sex for the rest of afternoon, I never experienced any jealousy. I've had threesomes since then, with two men and with two women and I always tell people, sex with two guys and one girl is way better. disciplinedsuccess
In the sixties....
In the sixties, I made love to many, many women. Often outdoors. In the mud and the rain. And it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing. TheLeviathaan
Best experience ever.
I always had a thing for bisexual women.
I had a friends with benefit chick who was bi.
I got myself a girlfriend, who has never been with a dude before, I was her first and It was clear from the get go that she liked girls more, where she could be dominant, with a brute like me it was not a possibility.
So, me being a considerate boyfriend, called up my fuck buddy and told her to join in. She came over.
Let me tell you something, Lesbian porn is a lie. What those girls did to each other, was art. I joined after like, 20 minutes of gawking in awe.
Best experience ever. WOLFBL00D
The Watcher....
Have had a few threesomes and a foursome with my wife. She's a bit of a queen so she actually enjoys watching me with others then joining in. For me I'm happy to please and it's just fun of course. Mostly came up when we kind of had a talk about fetishes and she said she wanted to try it.
Like most said though they aren't extremely amazing, usually you can't enjoy certain things you like, or there are some points where people can feel a bit unsatisfied. whyImcalledqueen
It's a Blur....
- Once was the boy toy for two Balinese women over the course of four days. That was awesome cause it was a travel fling, so it was like a blur.
- Part of promiscuity dinner club, kinda like a swingers club. Again blur.
- Several MMF and FFM with my primary partner. It all comes down to expectation setting, boundaries and communication. As a dominantly straight man, MFF are more fun, but there is an excitement to making your partner happy.
Some are more fun than others, just treat it like anything else. Process before and after. Self-care and post-care are key. Don't treat people like objects. Always treat the third with the same care and compassion as you would your own partner.
The more communication and lead up, the hotter it is. Lastly, communicate during. Even more so than you do with your primary. Tease and ask everyone what they like, what they have fantasized about. Communicate what you want. Double your fourplay and communication. Your sleeping for two now.
Oh, water breaks. You're going to need it if you pull this off correctly. A king bed is ideal. pm_me__your__pain
Thank God for the alcohol....
My ex girlfriend initiated it with a bi-curious friend of hers. i had nothing against it, was just a bit surprised that it came up. we did the deed after some light drinking and everyone got off. then my GF developed a huge problem about it and came overly paranoid, thinking I'd cheat on her with the friend. this was one of many major points when we finally went our own ways. notfun_87
Whoops....
Got pregnant, kind of married with both of them right now. My family was a little shocked. Tayoliv
The Ex & a Friend.
My ex and her friend wanted to be with me, (we were not going out yet), best part was oral. We experimented many positions, and me being a person who loves to be asfixiated, she obliged me while her friend was on top of me. When i was about to finish, my ex again performed on me orally. Awesome. tetrahidrocannabin0l
Eventually Tedious.
Ex-girlfriend and I actually first hooked up when she tried to initiate a threesome with me and another friend. Friend passed out immediately so we quietly messed around next to her. Next night, same thing. She and I started dating and eventually got the friend to join us, first couple of times were a lot of fun for everyone involved, then the just progressively got more tedious, stressful, and is probably what resulted in the end of that relationship. Fantasy fulfilled, not something I'm actively chasing anymore. TossedLikeMySalad
I had no pants.
I was the third wheel. I'm a guy. It was a random occurrence, totally unplanned, I just happened to fit their bill. I can't speak for them but it seemed like she was the one who wanted it, she wanted the attention on her, she wanted 2 men. 10/10 on my end. Except then I was left alone in Canada with a dead phone, an unpaid hotel room and regret.
My friend's mom (the people I went to canada with) had to pick me up. I had no pants. greatnameallday
I'm Good!
My wife (girlfriend at the time) set it up with one of her friends. (Not a friend we hang out with often.) While we were at a party. We went back to the friends house and it was fun, mutual foreplay and things like that, then I messed with my wife for a bit, then messed with the friend for a bit. Eventually finishing with my wife.
It was fun and all, except my wife got super jealous while I was messing with the other girl. So much so, that she really didn't like feeling that way, and while the 3 some was fun, we will probably never do it again.
I'm fine with that. I can say I've had a 3 some. I don't need it to be a regular thing to have a happy sexual relationship with my wife. Buwaro
Not Good.
I (f) haven't been in one while I was in a relationship, but the other two people were committed to each other. My friend and her boyfriend approached me about having a threesome and I agreed. It was kinda awkward with him, but with her it was fantastic. The experience wasn't bad altogether, but I don't think it's something I'd do again especially not while in a relationship myself. My friend and her boyfriend ending up splitting up really soon after and I always wondered if the threesome might have had something to do with that. peperomiayam
1-2-3....
My wife met a girl in grad school who was into the whole polyamory thing. They became friends and hung out a lot. One night after dropping a multitude of hints (my wife karaoke'd Britney Spears's "3" to her), and getting naked to go in the hot tub (which didn't end up working because the tub's heater stopped working -- in October), I finally just told her straight out that we'd love to have sexy times with her.
She agreed that it'd be fun, we lit some candles and all got in bed. Everyone had a great time over the next hour or so and we all passed out, completely satisfied
We still hang out with her as friends, but she since got into more serious relationships so we've never revisited the sexual relationship. binarybovine
All the Fish....
here is one person's take on it....
I went to a swingers club, Ended up joking with a guy in the smoking area about the "attendees" End of the night he invites me to him& his wife's party in a few weeks time.
Night finally comes, I arrive at their home, 4 couples and 2 single ladies present and awaiting on another 5 couples. Found out i was the only single guy (20ish) in a house of 40+ swingers.
After a few hours of socializing and being asked "Why do you swing"/ "Youre so young" etc The female host announced that everyone should go upstairs.
I walked in after stripping off in another room to see 4 ladies on the bed in various positions with guys or each other, Next room was the same but 2 ladies and a few guys.
I ended up being dragged into the 1st room by the host and given to his mrs and her friends, Like throwing a fish to pack or piranhas.... lol
Best night ever, Still friends, went on holiday with them last year. :) crellodrello
"Who do I WANT to have sex with?"
My extremely beautiful long-time friend was asked by her then-boyfriend to fulfill a fantasy of his. She reluctantly agreed, and after looking around on some sites she began to think, "Who do I WANT to have sex with?" She decided I was the only person she really wanted to sleep with apart from her boyfriend. I flew out on an unrelated trip and she prepared to seduce me. I was hit by a car the night before she was going to ask me to mess with her in front of him, so my broken shoulder (I later learned) wound up nixing the plan that I was unaware of.
I had the chance to meet her boyfriend for a little bit, and he saw how we looked at each other and decided she wanted me a little too much. This all came out about a month later. During that time, having re-set her frame of mind a little, she began to realize that she was in a relationship with a terribly abusive alcoholic and a few months later she broke up with him.
She came to visit me in my home city on the West Coast for the summer and asked me to marry her. We're going to be getting married next year and I couldn't be happier. Needless to say, the whole idea turned out to be a disaster for her ex and precipitated something wonderful for both of us. Handiclown
Too Much.
I figured out this type of thing wasn't for me by being a third for a couple. I was the other M in an MMF threesome.
It was an interesting experience, and I'm glad I tried it. It was really hot at times, but incredibly awkward at others. They were very nice people and we all got along well, but it made me feel weird being watched while having sex. Idk just made me hyper-aware of everything I did and made it hard to get into a rhythm. By the time I left, I was pretty sure group sex just wasn't for me. Too overwhelming and performative in a weird way.
And not intimate at all. I'm down for casual sex that's just physical, but this situation just felt sterile and impersonal to an extreme. Like I was a tool to be used for their pleasure . Not that that's a bad thing or inconsiderate on their part. It's what I signed up for. Just a reality of the situation which turned me off.
I think I would be down to try an MFF at some point because 14 year-old me would absolutely murder present-day me if I missed an opportunity to make that happen, but not as part of a couple. I think I'd need all three of us to be on relatively equal footing as unattached singles. Octopus_420
All the ways...
My girlfriend, now wife, suggested the idea with one of my former female work friends I stayed in contact with and we had drinks with pretty frequently. Of course I agreed to it but it turned out the entire thing was about them hooking up.
Sometimes they'd remember I was there and pay me a little attention but they'd get distracted by each other and leave me with nothing so I just moved to the arm chair in the corner of the hotel room and read a book.
I actually fell asleep in the chair and when I woke up they were both passed out on the bed. The chair sleep was horrible so I squeezed into the bed with them feeling grumpy af.
Later that day my gf gave me a hall pass to shag my friend. So even though the 'threesome' was a bust for me it ended up being a great weekend. ero_senin05
Not usually worth it.
Not usually worth it. I've had plenty of situations where me and another female friend got flirty with a guy and went to town, and some where two guys shared me. It's typically a lot of work, and you don't get a lot out of it.
And there are just as many grievances for which we are not at all sorry.
Curious to hear about people's track record of their questionable behavior, Redditor NanoPKx asked:
"What is something bad you have done with no regrets?"
Is it petty theft or flat out stealing? You decide.
The Parting Gift
"'Forgetting' to bring back a company ipad after they forgot about me having it. Actually they never asked for it back so I still have it and use it."
– Koetjeka
Furry Companion
"I stole a barn kitten while delivering packages for FedEx. He kept climbing my legs and getting into the van, sitting under the wheel when I tried to back out (it was a steep driveway, no way to swing the van around). I called the number on the package, looked the name up on facebook, called the local non-emergency to get contact info, all failed."
"So I took him. Now, if you're not from a rural environment, you might not understand that barn cats like that are 'no-man's-cats.' For all the owners know, he got sick or got got by a coyote. And he would have died, because when we got him to the vet he had a nasty upper resp infection and some other nasties."
"Now, one deformed nasal passage and the cutest snore later, we have a bonkers little orange cat with the heaviest penchant for snuggling I've ever seen (his name is Monty btw)."
"Edit: I forgot to pay my Cat Tax: https://imgur.com/a/HIXS4us"
"Edit Part 2: Monty loves the attention. Thank you for loving him as much as we do :3"
"MmmmMMMMRrrrrrrrrrrAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW" -Montgomerey Valentine, 2022
– SonOfSkinDealer
The Dirty Treat
"A housemate of mine kept eating mine and my girlfriends food and even though I asked him to stop the only thing he would ever say is 'I thought it was mine' then keep eating it."
"Well I bought my girlfriend some ice cream she really enjoys and she put the half she didn’t finish back in the freezer. Well when she want to get the rest it was gone and it made me madder than I think it probably should have."
"The very next time I saw him and somehow keeping a straight apologetic face I told him how he accidentally ate our sex ice cream and that bits of it had been on our parts etc. I told him I felt guilty not to tell him and that I had to apologise for him to eat such a thing."
"I will never forget the face he made when I told him. A face of pure self disgust and shock to which all he had to say was 'I wish you never told me that' and proceeded to move out around a month later."
"Although he didn’t actually eat sex ice cream, like why the f'k would you put it back after use anyway? Sometimes I wonder if I went to far but in that moment I just did not care at all. He still doesn’t know it isn’t true and I’ll probably never see him again."
"F'k you Vitas buy your own food."
– SpicyDolphin74
Vengeance is sweet.
Payback Time
"A drunk driver hit my parked car, left a huge dent in the front driver’s side door, and then drove away. I happened to be looking out the window at the time and saw the whole thing, including his plate number. Cops got there not long after and took my statement. After a couple days and a couple phone calls, I found out nothing was going to come of it because he was the son of the sheriff the next county over."
"Fast forward a couple months, I see his car parked behind a local bar within walking distance of my apartment. I got out my hunting knife and sliced all four of his tires, and made a couple trips around it destroying the paint job. Yellow Pontiac Sunfire, and I still remember the goddamn plate number even after almost 20 years."
– IgnoreMe304
For The People
"I was a GM for a retailer that was going out of business. During the liquidation I let my employees that worked until the end store product they wanted to buy in a closet I claimed I didn't have a key to. Oh the final days I sold them all the items they requested for 95% off. 70" tvs, ipads, gaming laptops whatever they requested."
– Midnights606
Surreptitious Swap
"Years ago I worked for a wealthy dude who was married to someone semi-famous. He would waltz in every morning and talk about the fantastic dinner he had the night before, how he hung out with some other famous person or whatever else."
"He paid me peanuts. I had a hard time making ends meet."
"I was the office assistant and IT guy. So it comes time to get a new computer for one of the designers. I spec something out, and show it to him. It was a ripper of a machine for the time (early 2000s). But it wasn’t expensive enough for bossman."
"So I added a really high end graphics card. Boss was happy then. The card added nothing for the designer: they only did illustrator and photoshop."
"So I came in that weekend and swapped the graphics card for my aging one from home."
"No one ever knew. Or cared. And I got a new graphics card."
– Dudeinairport
When times are tough, people had to do what it took to survive.
T.P. Crisis
"In college I was so poor I would steal toilet paper from the supply closet in our major building."
– Business_Loquat5658
Hungry College Buddy
"I stood watch for a college friend who was going hungry because he’d been disowned and his roommates had made living with him intolerable after he came out."
"I was loosely affiliated with an off campus program with local churches that gave free student dinners on Thursdays. We would go to church to eat, then bring dishes into the kitchen."
"Anyway, he would go in there and steal stuff like peanut butter, literal bread (not an allegory), granola bars etc. while I watched out for the pastor."
"Eventually we both got caught, the pastor for the college students got a bit mad because he was responsible for us while we were there to eat. And I think it was offensive on some level to steal from church. But then he saw what my friend was taking, and asked him if he had enough to eat. My friend shamefacedly said no, not usually."
“'Okay, fine. Put the food back, and come with me.' Took my friend grocery shopping instead, got him connected with the food pantry and community garden at church instead."
– SchnarchendeSchwein
Based on these examples, people didn't twice about their actions in the heat of the moment.
Within reason, we all gotta somehow get by.
But do you think their actions deserve punishment?
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When a person sees someone they care about going through a struggle or crisis, their instinct is to uplift them with positive advice.
But sometimes, the wisdom imparted by friends isn't always helpful or relevant to the situation.
Curious to hear from strangers online who could do without specific knowledge, Redditor Saibotnl1 asked:
"What life advice can just f'k off?"

These Redditors have a problem with how certain people have on outlook on life.
Time To Rest
"Sleep when you’re dead."
"Cool, but you’re going to be dead a lot sooner."
– Tag2graff
Irrelevant Sadness
"People have it so much worse than you so don’t be sad!"
– notrachelmar
"To that I like to say, 'people have it so much better than you so don't be happy!'"
– ___jupiter____
Your Life Path
"Almost anything relating to what age you must be in order to buy a house, have children, marry, have a profession, or do anything else. Seriously, everyone's life is different from everyone else's. Make your life the way you want it to be. If you so desire. Up to you."
– Frn071
On The Contrary
“Cheaters never prosper”
"Yes, they f'king do."
– waqasnaseem07
People can get out of any situation they find displeasing.
But others feel people should just "stick it out."
Ignoring Bullies
"Just ignore bullys or get someone else to handle it for you. I have never seen this work, only makes it worse. The only effective way I've seen to deal with them is by not making yourself an easy target and make them scared to f'k with you again. If going psycho on their a** is the only thing they'll respond to that's their fault. Also want to add in schools they will punish you for self defense but that punishment is only sitting around a few hours in detention or sitting around at home with a suspension. The punishment is temporary boredom, it's absolutely nothing compared to being bullied and when it's over the important message will still stand that you will not tolerate being a victim."
– User Delted
Remain to be Miserable
"Stick it out"
"Whether that's sh**ty jobs, shi**y relationships, shi**y living situations..."
"By all means don't just give up on things when you face challenges, but if something feels wrong or is wrecking your peace then take some control and change it if you can!"
– petitezoey
"Easy for you to say," might be an auto-response to these suggestions for many people.
Invitation For Recklesslessness
"Live like everyday was your last"
Yall know what people do when they learn they have a single day left to live?"
– LimeGrass619
A Possible Consequence
"I did that as a teenager and ended up homeless and addicted to heroin. Didn’t pan out for me too well."
"19 years sober though today."
– Open-Section-7263
A Practical Approach
"If I knew with certainty that I had one day left, I'd double-check all my financials, my will, and my insurance policies, make sure my wife had all of my passwords and knew where all the money was, spend the rest of the day with her and the kids, then call the medical examiner and ask to lie down on the gurney so that when I die they won't strain their back moving my remains out of my house."
– Asteriad
Nose Stuck In A Book
"Work while they sleep. Study while they party"
"That's not a recipe for success, that's a recipe for a lot of white hairs, burnout syndrome and a stroke before your 40s..."
– Khomuna
Doesn't Apply To Everyone
"Do what you love and money will follow"
"I love walking my dogs and grilling food for my friends but That sh*t doesn't pay the bills as well as my engineering degree!"
– Elons_android
While people's intentions are good, they're better off keeping their two cents in their own pockets.
Not everyone likes to hear platitudes.
Sometimes, people just want to know they're not alone with their problems over listening to unlikely solutions that are nothing more than superficial pick-me-ups.
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Kids start going to school from the age of five, and for the most part, they spend more time at school than at home. Because of that, teachers can become very important figures in the lives of their students.
Some students don't have the best home lives. Some keep it to themselves, but others confide in their teachers.
Curious about various situations, Redditor Delicious_Mastodon83 asked:
"teachers of reddit what is the saddest thing you found out about a student?"
In Need of Parents
"Not a teacher but was a school-based therapist. Had a student (7 -8 y/o) I didn’t know knock on my office door and ask if I’d adopt her and “if you have room, my brother too, but if not, that’s ok, we can be split up. We’re split up now. And I don’t take up space. I just need a sleeping bag”. Broke my heart."
– secretkpr
Heartbreaking, But Industrious
"My mom taught at a school in a bad neighborhood in Chicago in the mid 90’s. There was a second grader that would save his milk and ketchup packers from lunch for his mom so she had something to eat when she got home from work."
– PowerstrokeMe
Big-Hearted Mom
"Not a teacher but a parent with a 9 year old son. Every day I pack extra in my sons lunch because he tells me he has a friend that never has anything to eat. It's winter and my son came home and told me his friend was turning up with shorts and shirt and holes in his shoes. So I sent in a jumper and long pants for him to wear and some slightly used but good condition shoes. I have been up to the school recently and the teacher pulled me aside and thanked me profusely for helping this child. Apparently teachers are not allowed to aid kids they teach here in Australia and they have already reported the issue 3 times to child welfare without results so I was the only one helping this child. The teacher told me before I started sending in more food and clothes, this child would steal others food from their lunches and look through the bins because he was so hungry. They doubt he gets fed at home. So now I make sure to always send an extra lunch and some school clothes/supplies when I can. I can only hope child welfare eventually does something but it breaks my heart."
– spetzie55
Amazing Big Sister
"It was right after winter break and before class started I was just talking with some students and asked if they got anything fun for the holidays. One girl said on no, I don’t ever get presents, my mom is a drug addict. But I went out and got some stuff for my little sister so that she can have a real Christmas."
"She just said it so matter-of-fact. She was so used to being the parent to her little sister that she didn’t even care about her own childhood. It totally broke my heart."
– tonydanzascaulk
The Importance Of Human Affection
"Second hand story from my mom, elementary teacher for 30ish years. She had a hug or a handshake out the door policy, just some small contact and a proper goodbye, and had this young boy who always picked the hug. She wondered why he always went for it, most kids would go back and forth depending on their mood that day, so she asked him why he was always so excited for the end of day hug? His answer, "It's the only one I ever get.""
– needsawholecroissant
Coming Out The Other Side
"Two teenage boys (16/14) with learning disabilities were on my caseload, they never missed school but often ditched class. They were homeless mid-year after they went home from school to find the locks changed, their Mom had abandoned them for a new boyfriend. She didn't leave an address for them to find her."
"*Edit: both eventually dropped out, however a couple of years later the younger brother came back to visit. He and his brother were both working construction, and his brother had gotten married, had a child, and was living with his wife’s family."
"The younger had roommates and was saving for a car. He told me it was a shame I didn’t have kids, because I would make a good Dad."
"People often persevere, even with the odds stacked against them."
– Kursch50
True Parentification
"Not me but my daughter is a teacher, she has lots of stories but one that stands out for me is one of her kindergarten kids saying she was tired and her asking why, the little girl explained that she had been up all night with her mums newborn baby. She did this every night, fed her bottles and everything."
– lb47513343
Luckily, He Was Resilient
"This year I had a 17 year old kid enroll at my school. He was sitting in my math class and I could tell he was struggling. After class I took some extra time to go over a concept with him. I asked him to read the question to me, and he sat there silently. He then looked at me and said “I’m not going to lie to you, I cannot read. I have no idea how to say these words""
"Turned out at age 17 he was illiterate and had been kept out of school by his very religious, controlling parents. Over the past few months he has worked very hard! Now he can finally read at an 8th grade level and he is STILL improving!!"
– User Deleted
A Heroic Teacher
"I worked in an inner city charter school. One of my students (`M10) had a sib (M8) in a lower grade. The mom was there every day in the beginning of the year encouraging them, helping them and generally being very supportive... until a CPS agent spoke to me asking about her behavior. After CPS left things went downhill. The boys showed up late to class even though they lived a half block away from school. When in school both boys were tired from sleeping in the car while their mom "went fishing". She also had two very young girls which she dragged around making the boys take care of them. One day the boys didn't show up and their teacher walked over to the house to find the mom had loaded up the fridge, paid the rent for the month and abandoned them. The teacher (a candidate for sainthood btw) took them in, adopted them and grew them up to be great men."
– mopedarmy
This is really heartbreaking stuff! Luckily, teachers aren't just another adult in your life; they can be your saving grace as well.
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TRIGGER WARNING: This article contains sensitive content about depression and mental health.
As the stigma around mental health lessens (however slowly), people are more forthcoming about the problems they are facing. One of the most common mental health issues is depression.
Depression can affect many different types of people. Factors such as gender, race, nationality, and even age have no bearing on whether someone suffers from depression or not.
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), globally, "...an estimated 3.8% of the population affected, including 5.0% among adults and 5.7% among adults older than 60 years..."
Depression displays in certain patterns, such as mood changes, physical difficulties, and social isolation. However, depression manifests differently in different people and feels different to different people.
Reddit users divulged what depression felt like to them when Redditor iodineseaspray asked:
"What does depression feel like to you?"
Some of this is sure to sound familiar.
The Worst Kind Of Boredom
"Like being more bored than you could imagine but also not wanting to do anything at all, even breathe. So you want to do something, but you can't imagine anything that you would like to do so you're just sort of stuck."
– BuddhistSlater
"So you then spend literally hours staring at a blank wall hating yourself, your life, and everything around you. Well, as much hate as you can summon in the absolutely mentally numb state you find yourself sat in day after day."
– merryman1
Lack Of Motivation and Energy
"Complete lack of motivation."
"Ignoring people that I love, and who are trying to help."
"Just sh*t"
– HatFromStraw
"I feel it extra at work. Letting things slide until you either get into trouble or trying last minute to prevent it."
"Funny those times when I'm working to save my butt, the depression goes away and i feel super focused and motivated."
"I try to carry that energy over but no, it's rinse and repeat."
– ExtraBitterSpecial
Powerful Insecurity
"Insecure about absolutely everything, no hope for the future, dissociation from society and not knowing how to “act” anymore, feeling like I’m not as good at the things I always thought I was good at or that the “talent is wasted on me”, only food cheers me up and sometimes even that doesn’t work"
– tenamonth
Loss Of Creativity
"This. It's like some numb fuzziness you feel in your brain. It's the worst thing ever for an artist who just wants to create but your brain comes up dry with a dense fog that wants to just lie down for a few hours"
– FinnProtoyeen
A Mental Inability To Breathe
"For me, it feels like I’m in a lake with a ball chain tied to my feet, desperately swimming up for air, the only problem is the chain isn’t long enough. I can only get an inch of my head out of the water to breath, and as soon as a high tide comes, the water just floods over me and I feel like I can’t breath again. I live like this, constantly feeling like I’m struggling to breathe, weighed down by my own mind. It’s a struggle and I can’t really describe it in any other way, I’m jealous of people who don’t worry about depression"
– DrowningInBrokeness
"Like suffocating under a heavy cloak"
– kmartfreak
"Like being crushed. Like if the air was crushing my muscles and bones and I can’t breathe because I’m being crushed…"
"Kinda like that."
– Afreshnewsketckbook
Listlessness
"Scrolling thru your steam library. Thinking you want to play something, either not settling on anything or not wanting to put the effort into the game. Going back to the scrolling."
– Aistadar
"It feels like you're forced to play a game of Monopoly (represents life) and your just rolling the dice to appease everyone but you genuinely don't care about where you go, where you land, what you pick up, what you pay, what you gain."
"You kind of just watch it happen without interest and while people are cheering or oh no-ing for you, you genuinely don't care. Everyone is a piece on this board that hardly matters and you feel like we're all just running in a circle over and over again and it's boring and disinteresting as hell."
"You lose all curiosity for everything and just let everything happen and pass by you. No motivation, hardly any love, hardly any care. Feels like the world is in black and white and your waiting for the game to end became it's so absolutely boring and disinteresting, but it never does."
"You come to resent the game and eventually hate it because it feels like you're being forced to play it and suffer it's consequences when you never asked to play it in the first place."
"That's what depression felt like for me. Since then I've been medicated and recieved therapy. I'm doing a lot better now and I don't feel this way anymore, thankfully."
- KnlghtLlghts
A Relation To Fantasy
"You know that scene in the Lord of the Rings where Bilbo is describing to Galndalf what having the Ring all those years felt like? "I feel thin. Like too much jam spread over too much bread." That's honestly the best way I've seen to describe it."
– Electrical_Age_336
"I always say the closest thing to compare it to is a dementor in harry potter. It sucks every ounce of happiness out of you until there is only darkness left."
"Side note: chocolate always helps"
– sunfacer
Fear Of Lack Of Justification
"Like someone close to you died yesterday. Expect no one has, and nothing has happened to justify how you feel."
– AlterEdward
A Physical Pain
"Physical pain in my heart, will start crying just by attending to the physical sensation in my body."
– sagieday
Help Yourself
"I've always described it as having a shadow fixed to your brain which fuels things like indecision and negativity. You can do things to temporarily help but you can't truly shift it. Previous normality is forgotten. But it's amazing how much you can mask it."
"I found I didn't realise how bad I was until I started to get better"
"For anyone suffering with depression. Please, please speak to someone. Best thing I ever did"
– DavosLostFingers
Depression isn't something you can just deal with or get over. Learning to cope is not easy. However, as Redditor DavosLostFingers pointed out, talking to someone can literally save your life.
If you or anyone you know is struggling with depression, contact the American Psychological Association by phone at 800.374.2721 or 202.336.5500.
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