Just because someone is an adult or a parent doesn't mean crazy things can't fall out of their mouths every so often.
Sometimes parents say the darndest things.
That's why we should always have a pen or a recording device at the ready.
I suggest the phone.
Just wear fitted tees with pockets and hit record.
You have know idea how much having receipts will pay off mentally later.
Redditor TheGasMove wanted to hear about what things parents have said to their kids that left kids SHOOKETH, so they asked:
"What has a parent said to you that made you go WTF?"
The amount of things my mother has said to me that has left me gobsmacked is endless.
I should've kept a journal.
Comedy gold.
The Proof
Jennifer Lawrence Reaction GIFGiphy"After I told my mother that I didn't open up to her or my dad because I didn't trust them with my emotions, she started screaming that she hated me. Like, girl, this is exactly why I don't tell you things š."
LandPiranha63
Lessons Learned
"My mom told me that women pooped babies out of their butt. I believed this until I was 12 or 13. Boy, I got laughed at when I used this as my answer when asked in Sex Ed."
Eastern-Operation275
"I (27 F) have divorced parents and my mom always taught me the proper anatomy for things and that it's nothing shameful. On the other end, one day when I was at my dad's, a stray cat gave birth on his porch, and my stepsisters (same age) told my half-sister that it was coming out of the cat's butt, and I was like dude what? I questioned them, and they gave me scornful looks like I just said something offensive. LOL."
SpaceTimeBurrito
SURPRISE!!!
"A few months ago I had gone to do a surprise visit to my grandparents on my dadās side. While I was driving up their property I saw them walking in their groceries and witnessed seeing my dad for the first time. I had never met my dad in my life but knew my grandparents."
"I walked up and greeted my grandmother and she ushered me over to talk to my father. As I went to greet him this dude threw his hood on and jumped in his truck and locked the doors and said no words to me. Never in my life have I witnessed a grown man run away like that."
Dabtoker3000
Facts...
"My father once told me that between my brother and I, I was his favorite. This caught me off guard because I thought parents werenāt supposed to have favorites."
fun_Dip_fan
"My dad once told me Iām not his favorite. So I told him heās not my favorite either. Proceeded to get angry."
Honest_Math_7760
"It's problematic to share with your kids that you have a favorite."
LackEfficient7867
Bald Choices
Regret No GIF by Outside TVGiphy"I shaved my head at 21 and kept that hairstyle for the last 28 years. My dad walked into my room when I was 26 and asked me for a comb! He looked at me, thought about it for a second, and laughed. RIP dad. I miss you."
Content-Damage8406
It's my hair. I'll do what I want to.
That's the kid's motto.
Adults not so much.
At least that was my experience.
Why Bother?
Ytho GIFGiphy"When I called my mother to find out a good time of year to visit her she said, 'What for?'"
Space_T0ilet
Sure Papa Joe!
"Wasnāt my parents but my Grandpa."
ā'Josh can you take me to see Marge?' Marge was his long-time girlfriend who had Alzheimerās. My GP was in his 70s at the time and we took away his car because he was a dangerous man behind the wheel, to say the least. 'Sure Papa Joe!' That or PJoe was his nickname."
"Drive him to the place Marge was cared for at. Stop at the front and ask 'How long until I come back?' He replied 'Give me an hour. That should be long enough for us to have sex.' I start crying laughing and he leaves with a giant smirk. I could never look at him again without thinking or saying 'Almost 80 and still getting after it, WTF!"
ackbosh
The Joker
"Oof. I hadnāt talked to my dad in 15 years. I decided to reach out (for certain reasons and not to restart a relationship). He asked if he could ask me about my life. I let him. I told him, among other things, I was in a wonderful relationship with a terrific gal."
ā'Is this a real relationship or like the girlfriends I had when I was with your mother.'ā
"I was equally glad I disowned him 15 years ago, disappointed a man and a father would speak like that to his estranged son, and angry that he was the father I was born to. He is just one big joke to me."
Silence-brothers
Chop Chop
Steve Harvey Reaction GIFGiphy"I would often visit the kitchen to watch how my mother cooks. One day when my father saw me coming out of the kitchen, he said 'You keep visiting the kitchen, your penis and testicles are gonna fall off. Thatās how girls are made.ā Context: I was 7 when he said that to me and we are a Korean family."
DeepSleepr
Learning to cook, is a great survival skill.
More dads need to get onboard with that.
Curious about which foods left people disappointed, Reddit user cloudtdaz asked:
"What food have you tried liking but just canāt?"
Peeps
"Peeps,the Easter sugared candy."
"I like to think I can digest anything covered in sugar BUT NOT THAT...."
~ Asapdustybraids
"Theyāre best when theyāre stale. I canāt eat them fresh."
~ Vicktrolia
"My grandmother would send them to my dad every single year. He would leave them in the cabinet for probably 2-3 years. When the new pack arrived on Easter he popped open the 3-year-old pack."
~ DrKennethNoisewater-
"He dry aged peeps. That's incredible and terrifying."
~ BeesNeverSting
"Peeps are some of the foulest creations that have ever hit the food realm. Whoever invented them needs to have their existence removed from history."
~ shatteredhelix42
GiphyGrape-Nuts
"Grape-Nuts."
"I hated them as a kid but as an adult I decided to try them again, thinking maybe my tastebuds had matured by then."
"Nope. They were still just as awful as I remembered."
~ kanna172014
"My grandpa used to eat them every morning with coffee instead of milk."
"I'm not sure if he was lactose intolerant or what but good grief, I can't imagine what that combination tasted like."
~ hornet_teaser
"As a kid, I never felt more lied to."
"I liked grape juice and grape flavored candy, so why wouldnāt I like 'Grape-Nuts'?"
~ triton2toro
"Hate the cereal, but love the ice cream."
"Not sure if it's just regional, but here in Maine Grape-Nuts ice cream was around for decades. I think only Gifford's still makes it commercially."
~ LakotaGrl
Just Offal
"Intestines/innards of any kind and solid portions of fat on meat."
"One of my husband's favorite dishes is barbequed intestines (Japanese barbecue) and I can smell its appeal, but I physically can't deal with the texture."
"And it really saddens me because I've always wanted to eat menudo and I know the soup is bomb AF š."
"I think I have some sort of fat/chewy PTSD from when I was forced to eat gristle off of meat as a kid."
~ LeocadiaPualani
"Yeah I can't do innards either."
My mom loves that stuff because 'it was the cheap stuff back then" and they had a big family. I guess I'm glad I'm an only child."
~ ilovepeachpie
Black Licorice
"Black licorice."
"I've accepted my DNA just can't stand the stuff."
~ slimpawws
"My mom loves it. She makes it look so good."
"I'm 29 and I still think 'hmm maybe this time...'."
"Nah. It's like tar vomit."
~ lpcoolj1
"Same with my mom."
"Black licorice, black jellybeans. She loved āem."
"I inherited exactly ZERO of her taste buds for that."
"It is the foulest flavor ever."
~ Retro_Dad
"Black licorice tastes like depression."
~ pr0f0undleader
GiphyEggnog
"I canāt drink eggnog."
"Every year I give it a shot and try to like it, but I just canāt."
~ cyberzed11
"I mean , itās essentially drinking (sometimes alcoholic ) custard. So thatās fair."
"I myself cannot be trusted with eggnog and should not be left unsupervised or I will put a straw in a half gallon container and slowly sip years off my life."
~ logicjab
"Iāve always thought it tastes like bad bubblegum so Iāve never really been a fan either."
~ Huntsvegas97
"Liquid snot."
~ SalesTaxBlackCat
"Yep this. I give it a shot every year to see if itās changed. It doesnāt."
"I give it to someone else in my house who likes it; or pour it down the drain."
~ Electric_Leopard
"Itās truly awful. Texture taste smell, all just bad."
~ ruffsnap
Liver
"Liver the smell alone makes me sick."
~ Redditor
"I just wonder how Humans get to that stage."
"They find something, it smells foul, cook it, still smells foul, AND THEN DARES TO EAT IT."
"We're glorious as a species."
~ xseodz
"I'm guessing when we first started eating liver, humans didn't smell very good either."
~ LakotaGrl
"I have tried it maybe 15 times, different preparations because people claim their recepie makes it not taste like sh*t."
"Lo and behold, it still tastes like funky iron meat."
"I don't even like foie gras for the same reason, that metallic taste comes through, ugh!"
~ doomLoord_W_redBelly
Kombucha
"Kombucha, smells like stinky feet and taste like vinegar to me."
~ -LordKromdar-
"Kombucha absolutely DOES taste like vinegar, coming from someone who loves it. Other kombucha enjoyers will try to deny the vinegar taste, I embrace it because I bloody love vinegar."
"I even have 'sipping vinegars' in my fridge in various flavors, to add to cocktails or to pour a shot glass of and sip onā¦ just pure vinegar."
"Very strange of me, and I totally understand why other people would not like that flavor."
~ UnderwaterParadise
"Oooh people used to drink vinegary things a lot more because they were refreshing! Try raspberry shrub!"
~ lyan-cat
GiphySparkling Water
"I know this is a drink, but sparkling water."
"I like some flavors, but I canāt stand that after taste. Bleh!"
~ TruBluBritt
"The way I describe it: 'it's what tv static would taste like' or 'it's the same flavor as hitting your funny-bone'."
~ LazyLich
"We were given some flavored water at work and my employee said it tasted like 'a strawberry farted in the water'."
~ g-e-o-f-f
"My son calls LaCroix a piece of fruit waving to to a can of water."
~ pittipat
"I say with Perrier that someone yelled a flavour into the water."
~ structuredchronicles
"My favorite is 'someone placed a lime skittle next to some soda water'."
~ DosiMoe
Overnight Oats
"Overnight oats. They're basically lumpy, cold snot in my throat first thing in the morning."
"I gag just thinking about adding chia seeds."
~ DarkDesireX
"This comment has me literally confused as to if I actually like my overnight oats or just tell myself I do."
~ Lord_Knorr
"Oh man. I feel this."
"It just looks like refrigerated vomit to me. Absolutely not."
~ slmr38
"I tried to like overnight oats for a couple of weeks."
"Tried a bunch of different recipes, but they all ended up being disgustingly sweet slop."
"The only one I sort-of liked was the 'chai latte' one, which emphasized spices over sweets."
"Still not worth the effort to make themāI'd rather just make microwave oatmeal."
~ Noise_Cancellation
Wine
"Wine. Every year I'll try it around the holidays with family and it's still gross."
~ Redditor
"You can only appreciate wine after you have tasted the bitterness of life."
~ Spirited-Site-Hunter
"Once in my life I have tasted wine that I actually liked, and that was Golconda wine, which I tried in Darjeeling."
"After I got back to the USA, I decided that I would, for the first time in my life, actually spend money to acquire wine."
"Went to a wine shop. They had never heard of it."
"Turns out itās not exported, and if you want some, you have to go to India."
~ Wild-Lychee-3312
GiphyOlives
"Olives. I've tried many varieties."
"I always try them because they look like they'd be good but they're just not."
~ TRIGMILLION
"As a bartender for over a decade, Iām constantly surrounded by olives."
"They always look good & once in a while Iām like 'do I like these yet?'.ā
"No. I still hate olives, & I hate myself more for trying again each time & expecting different results."
~ kandixchaotic2
Matcha
"Matcha ! Just tasteslike grass to me."
~ mulberrycedar
"I worked in a business park that had a matcha headquarters in it. They moved out and dumped big boxes full of matcha samples that they took to trade shows."
"Never tried it before but I was thinking what a treat I had found, I would be enjoying free matcha for at least a year if not longer."
"Boy was I wrong."
~ TiogaJoe
"Seriously, I do not get the hype about it at ALL."
"Like when people tell me matcha frappes at Starbucks are the best I'm just like š„“š„“ bffr dude?"
"That sh*t tastes like creamier wheatgrass. Nasty."
~ SilverWorry8047
Mushrooms
"Any kind of mushroom."
"It's not the texture there is always a taste that i cant do for some reason."
~ Correct_Ad4937
"Taste and texture for me! Itās the only food I absolutely hated since I was a child."
~ BelenadaSilva
"Same. I can eat them on a supreme pizza because they just get lost in everything else, but if I can taste them, I'm out."
~ notonrexmanningday
"Eating cooked mushrooms feels like chewing on rubber."
~ Icy_Ad_9134
GiphyBeets
"Beets. I just can't."
~ Many_Dirlam
"What got me to like cooked beets was a beet and goatcheese salad at an upperscale restaurant."
~ dilfybro
"Nope! Tried one of those and they still taste like dirt."
"I don't care how you prepare them, pickled, roasted, whatever the f'k, they taste like dirt."
~ vandelayATC
"Vile root.
"Wash them, peel them, boil them, add sugar, mix with sour cream, put in a salad, all you accomplish is different tastes to accompany the overwhelming flavor of DIRT."
~ logicjab
Okra
"Okra."
~ crablegsforlife
"Soggy fried okra is the dinner of my nightmares."
~ Bigsam1514
"Okra is an abomination."
"I like damn near all vegetables but that slimy bullsh*t can f'k right off back to the ectoplasmic bog it slithered out of."
~ An_Appropriate_Song
"Okra? Sheās not that bad."
"You have to at least admit she was generous with the audiences and she's a decent interviewer."
~ Redditor
GiphyI have two to add that weren't mentioned:
- lima beans
- salmon
Which is embarrassing as both are culinary staples in my culture.
Lima beans are probably disliked by plenty of people, but salmon is on lots of restaurant menus. I've tried it over a dozen waysāpoached, broiled, grilled, pan-seared, smoked, marinated, as sashimi, dried, loafed, bakedāand I just don't like the taste of it.
Salmon is the only fish or seafood I've tried that I dislike and I've had both octopus and sea urchin. I'm sure my ancestors are mocking me.
Have you ever really wanted to like a popular food but ended up giving it a hard pass?
Share your experience in the comments!