Hey, did you ever have that kind of ex that constantly threw ragers in his parents' basement and thought marijuana was a personality trait? Because I sure did, and was it EXHAUSTING. I should've taken these as signs early on and gotten the heck out. Keep an eye out for these, so you don't waste your time with another idiot.
u/big_brainer asked: What screams "I'm too immature to date someone"?
So annoying.
Inability or unwillingness to look at problem or issue through your partner's perspective.
"It is the mark of an intelligent person who can entertain an idea without accepting it." Aristotle
Why would you even do that?
GiphyDeliberately trying to make the SO jealous.
My ex sent nudes to her cousin to try and make me jealous.
EVERYONE needs to do this.
Inability to self correct or to take criticism.
Well f*ck you too.
This.
Making the other person responsible for yourself, whether it's about your mental or physical health, feeding habits, cleanliness or anything else.
I have a friend like this. She went to college with her (now ex-)boyfriend and ended up losing over 20 lbs causing her to be very underweight for her height. When I asked how much she was actually eating, she told me it's not much because her boyfriend doesn't "remind" her to eat. I asked how she survived high school and she said her mom would just make her lunch and dinner so she would eat then.
I tried telling her that was not healthy at all and she should never rely on someone else to remind her to take care of herself (said in nicer words, but you know what I mean).
She also is constantly trying to get back with this ex even though she's told me how mentally and sometimes physically abusive he was. She just started therapy so hopefully that helps her get out of this behavior.
Hypocrisy is annoying af.
GiphyHaving a list of qualities the other person should have but not once thinks about how to better themselves or what they can bring to the relationship.
Example: You want someone who doesn't smoke, but you smoke.
This hits home so much. Had an ex with a list. Basically her and her stepmom came up with this list and the guy had to hit most of, if not all of them. She told me this, I never asked her what was on it and if I fulfilled these things, but I instantly thought: she has a lot of issues and personality flaws and attitude problems. I thought, where is the list she made for herself for her own self improvement?
You can't find a perfect person. Also, you should always work on yourself before demanding things from others
I fear she'll never have a successful relationship.
Beyond frustrating.
Agreeing to date someone, ghosting them for a week, then calling the person they are dating clingy for wanting to spend time with them.
This is how my ex behaved. He accused me of being clingy when I just wanted to see him more than once every two weeks.
Ugh.
When they're full of themselves. "I don't understand why people wouldn't date ME I mean I have such-and-such!"
I have a penis and I shower daily. Who wants some?
This is a big one.
GiphyNot being able to talk honestly about sex and birth/disease control.
Aside from too immature to date, that's a person that's too immature to be having sex.
ACCURATE.
Thinking there are any positives in any way to the relationship between the Joker and Harley.
When someone says their relationship is like Joker and Harley Quinn's, they're usually right - just not self-aware enough to realize this is a bad thing.
I'm kind of optimistic about Birds of Prey hopefully making sure the depth of Harley's arc percolates into pop culture. She isn't "the Joker's girlfriend", she's his ex-girlfriend, and she knows their relationship was abusive. Hopefully the movie will make everyone who says "we're just like J+H!" think twice about their relationships.
More people need to know this.
Thinking love is gonna "fix you" or solve everything and make your life perfect.
At least in my eyes, the people who have the healthiest relationships are the people who have learned to have healthy, happy single lives. That way they don't put romantic love on a weird pedestal and expect way too much of their partners.
Jealousy sucks.
GiphyNot letting your partner do anything or be friends with people of the opposite sex. If your boyfriend or girlfriend tells you that you can't see other platonic friends because they might cheat, they need to go.
Big red flag.
Comparing your significant other to your ex. Doesn't matter what gender, race, etc.
Woooow.
Drunk texting your girlfriend's mom to shit talk her and her daughter (while still well aware you are indeed texting your girlfriend's mother).
Be yourself!
GiphyChanging yourself to suit another person in a new relationship or getting super into new hobbies and interests because your new SO is into them. Just be yourself.
NOT normal.
Thinking fighting all the time is normal. I don't mean bickering and arguments. I mean full on, yelling screaming slamming doors fighting. I've been with my now husband for 5 years and we have NEVER had a screaming match. The few times we've gotten close to being that angry we both had the wherewithal to say "you know what let's table this and talk about it later", then did something silly to bring the edge off.
Curious to hear from ex-lovers who've been there, Redditor Lishasquarepant asked:
"What caused your last break-up?"
These Redditors found they and their significant other were no longer on the same page.
"Simply, we grew apart."
– catetheway
"Same, I feel like Michael Scott everytime I try to start another relationship. 'No question about it, I am ready to get hurt again.'"
– Gthew
Happier Apart
"Same. We loved each other like siblings, not spouses... Ugh! Lovely man though who now has a fab girlfriend. We are good friends and much happier apart."
– MoxieHasKnottyBits
No Regrets
"Same. And it f'king sucks, but that’s life. It’s been a year and I still hate every second that she’s not in my life, but at the same time I know she’s happier now than she would’ve been if we stayed together."
– throway35885328
Having no communication is the worst part.
Silent Partner
"He slowly got distant. I believe he lost interest and didn't dare be honest with me about that."
– GaiaNatur77
The Late Blame Game
"I had that happen as well, but then he pinned it on me being distant and not affectionate enough."
"My guy, if you pull your hand away every time I try to hold it, I'm gonna stop trying to hold it. And if I ask if something's up and you repeatedly tell me everything is fine, I'm going to believe you. Don't wait till I'm at my worst moment and then reveal you had issues with me for 3 months and break up with me for it being 'my fault.'"
– Billielolly
"Everything Is Fine"
"Oh man, the asking repeatedly and getting a 'nothing' reminds me of a story."
"My friend used to ask her ex this every time he was unusually quiet. He’d always say he was fine, then at one point, told her to stop asking because it was making him feel weird."
"So she did."
"Six months later he initiated a divorce because she didn’t care about his feelings anymore."
"Like…don’t ask for sh*t then get pissy when you get what you want."
– TheRealJackReynolds
And then there are those who were not invested in the relationship for a long time.
The Struggle Is Real
"He seemed to struggle with the concept of not f'king random people."
– spanglesandbambi
Leaving The Problem
"He moved to his country because he missed his family. So he only sent a WhatsApp message saying he was going to stay there. I would have preferred a call at least to break up a marriage."
– kattia12
New Life
"Something similar happened to my cousin. He married her in the US, they had a baby together.. a few years go by, he misses home, goes back to visit.. His family had an arranged marriage ready for him 🤦🏻♀️ He ended up with a new wife and new baby. Hasn’t came back."
– MysticalMom7
A Foreign Custom
"It just seems so surreal that a grown a** adult with a wife and baby would leave his family behind for an arranged marriage. I'll never fathom the mentality."
– ro0ibos2
Ouch
"I wasn't having sex near as often as she was."
– YourWordsMatter
Breaking up is hard to do.
But a good thing to remember is that love can be found again and the new relationship can be even better than the previous one.
And that's something that can't be recognized until you look back in retrospect.
We all have to kiss a few toads.
Redditor TractorLoving wanted to hear about the things many of us have seen that left us shaken and a bit scared, so they asked:
"What's the most creepy thing you've ever witnessed?"
I've lost track of the number of things that have creeped me out in life.
I barely leave the house.
From the bushes...
the lion king disney GIFGiphy"When I was about 12 I was sleeping on my trampoline with a friend and we heard the bushes move behind us, we flashed our flashlight to the bushes and a mountain lion was laying there stalking us, I have never run so fast in my life."
Fortherecord87
Voices
"Finding my dad dead in his recliner. I swear I heard his voice when the coroner came for his body."
PolesawPolska
"My granddad knocked over my great-grandma's ashes in his car accidentally, and to this day swears he heard her laugh, loud and clear as if she was standing next to him. She had a hugely wicked sense of humor and would have found this (and my very stressed granddad carefully collecting her ashes back into the container before my grandma saw) very funny."
Tanyaaahhh
From the Sea
"When I was serving my time as an engineer in the merchant navy we used to have to clean out what is called 'sea chests;' they're basically big filters for seawater that we would pump in to use as coolant and if the pumps were on when we were dockside we'd find all sorts of things like bottles, fish, crabs etc."
"One day we opened up the chest, pulled out the filter, and immediately saw this gold shiny thing which turned out to be a Rolex watch. Usually, we'd just dump out the filter but with the mitigating circumstances, we went through it thoroughly and found a piece of a shirt with cufflink still attached and last but not least a nicely rotted finger."
"The police ended up closing off the dock and dredging it but never found anything on the end." ~ MarkyBhoy101
Terrified
Watching I See You GIF by TravisGiphy"This guy followed me home. Said he saw me there often and named a few local spots I go to sometimes as places he sees me. It’s been about a year. Never saw him again. I was terrified for a little while for sure."
ewqdsacxziopjklbnm
Stay vigilant out there kids.
People are watching and some of us don't notice.
Back Up Creep
Scared Homer Simpson GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"I was in a restaurant years ago on lunch break. At the time I was a very thin 25-year-old woman. There was this big creepy guy sitting there who would NOT stop staring at me from the moment I walked in the door."
"I mean just open face staring without blinking for the entire 15 minutes I was eating several seats away. I asked for a box and left early to get away from him. As I walked out he said, 'You shouldn't be out alone. Someone's going to grab you and steal you away." 100% convinced creepazoid had someone locked up in his basement."
xain_the_idiot
'Youth in need'
"Was working in a restaurant. Nice place. That night we held a charity dinner for a 'youth in need' type of house. The guy representing the house, a worker there, was such a nice and kind man. Every teen there was only saying nice things about him. A good soul, that was giving everything he could for these teens."
"At one point they gave a big check to the charity. I must guess an amount they rarely received. Well under the excitement, that poor man had a cardiac arrest. Dropped there on the stage, cheque in hand. He couldn't be brought back. He died. Seeing this was already bad enough, but the kids everywhere in the restaurant screaming and crying for hours after... haunting."
Agronut
Inside the House
"One random night in middle school I woke up and had the odd feeling that something or someone was present in the house and coming towards my room. I was scared so I closed my eyes to pretend to be asleep. I could faintly hear something come into my room and it felt like someone was standing over me, looking to make sure I was asleep. I laid on my back, eyes shut, until the feeling passed, and ended up falling asleep. I woke up in the morning to find out that our house was robbed."
ThatOtherOtherGuy3
There in lies the rub...
"Well dressed 50 something business dude on a quiet Chicago L train reading a Wall Street Journal. Pretty woman with long curly hair dozing in the seat in front of him, her hair dangling behind the seat. The guy is rubbing and playing with her hair while reading his paper so I figure she's his wife or girlfriend who just wanted some space to nap."
"He is now intently rubbing and fondling her hair and not reading anymore. Suddenly she snaps awake and pulls in her hair like a bug was in it or something. She gets off at the next stop, he continues reading. They didn't know each other at all."
mtzuker
Why do people feel the need to overshare?
People really need to discuss boundaries.
