Sometimes, we ARE the school story.
New York University has a tale of a freshman college student who created something called "Narnia" in his room; where he cut out the back of his closet to give him, his friends, and his roommates somewhere to smoke in their dorm room. This story was so legendary that it made it through several generations of students, all of whom told the story more exorbitantly than the next.
The incident also made any modifications to one's room at NYU illegal and reason to be kicked out of housing. Yet if you met this person, you'd find he was just another student. That could have so easily been you.
And there are so many who are that student.
Here were some of those stories.
It Ain't No Jiffy Pop
A movie theater near my house in high school had a promotion that ran all spring and part of the summer. "Bring in any container, and we'll fill it with popcorn for the cost of a large". About 2 weeks before senior skip day, a local Kmart was having a closing sale. I realised they were selling EVERYTHING. I got a storage barrel, about waist high. Big enough for an adult to crouch down and hide in.
On senior skip day, me and 3 friends went to the movies. During the day, they sell tickets at the concession stand, so no one saw us bring in the barrel. Guy comes out and asks what we want, we get 4 drinks and i ask if they're still doing the popcorn promo. Guy says yes, and I ask him if it truly was for any container. Again he says yes. I pick up this huge barrel and say I want it filled please.
Guy laughs and gets his coworker. They both start filling it up while laughing. Ended up being 10 large popcorns worth of volume, cleared out alllll the popcorn they had premade. We watched our movie, then lugged the popcorn barrel to a nearby park and took it to the top of an overlook tower.
By the end of the day, we had only eaten like 10-20% of what was in there. Took the rest home and grazed on it for the next day or two. After that, I took the last half to the creek behind my house and dumped it all there. The squirrels ate like kings.
After my freshman year of college, i came home on spring break and went back to that movie theater. I asked if they were doing that bring your own container promo. They said no, some guy last year abused the system and the manger got pissed so they canceled it.
I asked about the incident, just to see what they'd say. She pulled a picture one of the guys had taken of the barrel full of popcorn behind the concession counter and said "well, the guy brought in a barrel. The manager figured that at most people would bring in their popcorn bowls from home. Once they realized that any container meant ANY container, they stopped the promo."
Oh Okay So I Guess Not ANYTHING
I worked at a really small family owned cafe and there was only ever one person on shift at a time.
My boss was chill with us doing whatever we wanted if there were no customers, so I would whip out my iPad and work on essays when the place was dead and I had nothing to do.
They had cameras, and after about a week we got an email that no electronics were allowed in the shop, including iPads.
Sry 2 B Trdy 2 Da Prty
It was after I left, but my high school had to change the entire way they issued tardies and absences because I abused the system. Used to go halfway late to class because then they couldn't call my parents because I wasn't technically absent.
People Explain The Worst Thing That's Ever Happened To Them On Their Birthday
We almost feel like heroes when we can claim credit for the way something shook out.
Employers Making Sure Sick People Don't Get Paid, As Usual
At work, I had saved all floating holidays, vacation weeks and sick days for years. Then I had a heart attack, and a bypass. Eight weeks off, and didn't miss a cent off my paycheck. The next year my appendix blew out, and another 9 weeks off, with not a cent missing from my paycheck.
The managers decided that from then on, you had to take your vacation, floating holidays and sick days in the year that you earned them. Not let them build up for a decade and a half!
You must wear the uniform pants OR skirt, not both. I found the fit on the uniform pants weird and it made me very self conscious, but I live in Canada and wearing an above-the-knee skirt in January was chilly.
Wore them together for most of the winter, and it caught on with a number of other girls too. The next year the uniform policy was changed.
We Love A Little Batman Villain
No running in the playground.
My school used to have a sort of gravelly concrete texture playground. It looked exactly like gravel that was all stuck down. The top had been smoothed down a lot, but if you fell it obviously stripped a lot of skin off.
One day, we were playing Stuck in the Mud (a chasing game). Anyway, I got caught and immediately stopped. The person following me didn't, so they ran into my back and bowled me over, us both going almost full pace. They landed on top of me, pinning my face to the ground as we skid along the ground for s few feet.
Honestly, it wasn't that bad in the grand scheme of things. It stripped off a few layer of skin, looked like a Batman villain, but nothing went deep enough to cause harm. I remember the look of horror on the faces of everyone else, and being escorted to the medical room with a gaggle of teachers in front of me covering all the mirrors and reflective surfaces!
But it scared the school into action, my mum was a governor and said this had always been a concern, but I really triggered it. In the immediate term, they banned running on that surface. Longer term, a couple of years, they installed a new rubberised AstroTurf surface. That surface was/is lovely. Us kids loved it, we could play so much more fully with slides and dives and all sorts because we didn't get flayed anymore! So I like to think my sacrifice was worth it.
4Square Is LIFE
Four square was life as a sixth grader. It took on its own culture with its own laws. I happened to dominate at four square. So much so that the vice principal intervened to change the rules that neither I nor any mortal made.
Even with these unjust usurpations, I managed to prevail time and again. And that's when they implemented a rule that said if the vice principal thought you played enough, you had to go to the back of the line. Like a peasant.
And if someone else you know ever happens to pass through that school or place of work, you totally have bragging rights.
Are These Still A Thing
Local paper delivery boy when I was 10 or 11.
I had about 60 houses and the paper cost $2/month for a weekly paper. On the 4th week of each month, it would be our job to go and collect door-to-door the $2.
Our pay was based on a % of collected doors. If you collected < 50% of your houses, you got 33% of whatever you collected. If you collected > 50% of your houses, you got 50% of whatever you collected.
I soon learned that I had a few homes that were subscribed to the route but who never paid. I stopped delivering to them and my boss informed me that the payment for the paper was actually optional, therefore I need to still put a paper on their doorstep.
For the next several months, I collected from my usual houses but I didn't turn in any money - feigning that all of my houses chose not to pay. Since their payment was optional, my young mind decided that submission of their payment should be optional too.
A few months later, they mandated payment from customers along with a new receipt policy for proof of payment. I was fired that same month.
The Max Lotto
My high school tried to encourage people to read by making a drawing for a Barnes and Noble gift card where you could add your name for each book you checked out.
What they didn't expect was I was an absolute book nerd and a fast reader so I would check out the max amount of books each day only to turn them in the next morning and rinse and repeat. I only checked out books I've read before so if they quizzed me I could say I read every book I checked out. I won about 50$ worth of Barnes and Noble gift cards before they decided to put a max on drawings per person.
Just Going Too Far On Purpose
Our school banned waterbottles because of me.
For some reason an extreme health/water drinking fad started among our school's girl students and they would come to school with their mineral water valpre bottles, constantly sipping.
Eventually the guys also picked up this fad. So I decided to turn this into a joke and began bringing to school and lugging around a massive 10L plastic jug of water - those that go on top of water coolers in offices. Eventually, lots of other kids also started doing this and began bringing larger and larger bottles to school. Everywhere you would see girls with 5L jugs and guys with 10L drums of water.
Not wanting the spotlight taken from me, I then upped the ante by bringing a mini wheelbarrow to school with THREE of those 10L bottles on it.
After a while it all did start to kinda look ridiculous and my school was posh and image-conscious with very elegant uniforms.
So then one day the principal had enough.
He completely banned all water bottles and said that we must drink water from the taps in the bathrooms and the other faucets all over the school grounds (our city has very clean tap water so it is safe).
While we may have gotten in trouble in the moment, these stories were totally worth it to become absolute legends to all who came after us.
And though nobody may repeat exactly what we did, may future legends take our spots with new and exciting ideas.
We've all said something stupid, let's not lie to ourselves.
It's okay to say something stupid. It showcases the real person on the inside, that we're all flawed, imperfect, and made of cooky combinations of words that don't necessarily line up to make sense. Sometimes we're nervous in a situation, other times we're just hitting 'Quick Reply' in our brains and what comes out doens't work, but whatever the reason, you for sure are going to remember it, late at night, for the rest of your life.
What is the stupidest thing that ever came out of your mouth?
You may not have to change your home address because of these moments, but you should probably reconsider how many public outings you go to afterwards.
Should Probably Never Shop At That Store Again
"When the cashier said "Have a nice day", and I replied with "No, thanks".
"Background: I wasnt thinking straight that day, and thought they said "Do you want a bag"
That's. How. Twins. Work?
"Her: the twins are 3 years old"
"Me: Both of them?"
"Oh no this unearthed a memory i had buried from kindergarten lmao"
"We had a set of twins in our classroom and once on their birthday party I said "your brother got such a cool party, i hope yours is nice like this too" to one of them and he was like "yeah, this one"
"4 year old me was not a very bright kid"
That's. How. Death. Works...
"Watching the documentary 'The Last Dance' when a Kobe interview pops up -"
"Me: "Wow, they must have filmed this before Kobe died."
"My wife: "Yeah, obviously…."
The cringe comes out of nowhere, and you're not even sure how you were able to ask something so incredibly stupid, but here you are. Lounging in the stupid air.
You Should Have Asked What "Nothing" Tastes Like Next
"In my head I was wondering what one pound of water would look like in terms of volume. What I said out loud however was "How much does a pound of water weigh?"
Keep Up With Me
"A couple of months ago, I got up and drove to work as usual. Later, my girlfriend texted me from home to ask me if she had left her sunglasses in my car. I told her I wasn't sure, but she could grab my spare key and go check."
"In my car."
"Which I had driven to work."
Black Is White, White Is Black
"I don't understand why people place bets on who wins, why not just place bets on who loses?"
"Yeah took me a minute to register what I said..."
And then there's these stories, where the person is probably better off cutting off any human contact henceforth going forward. These are rough to get through, folks.
Should Probably Have A Chat With HR After This
"I was about 4 months into my current job, feeling confident being fresh off the contract-to-hire period, now moved into a coveted full time role. While walking back to my office from the morning kanban I was stopped by my boss, head peeking out of the office:"
"Boss: "Hey TheMediator, do you have a sec?"
"Me: "For you, I've got lots of secs!"
"Boss: wide-eyes, mouth dropped"
"If you're curious why this was incredibly stupid/embarrassing, try saying the phrase "lots of secs" out loud. Preferably, not to your boss though."
You Don't Need College Anymore. Go Home. Bury Your Head In The Sand.
"In my freshman year of college I was dorming next door to a couple cute girls. About a week into the first semester one girl walked from the coed showers to her dorm room in her towel still wet. We were both unlocking our doors to get in our rooms when she looks at me and says…"
"I know I look stunning…(sarcastically)"
"To which I replied, "don't flatter yourself."
"I had to slid a note under her door explaining I was tongue tied as she was beautiful and I meant to say "don't be hard on yourself, you look great." (Or something to that nature). We became good friends."
It's In The Descriptor?
"Chatting to a homeless guy on the street and he told me he was feeling unwell. I told him he should be at home, resting."
"It's been 20 years and the memory of it still brings me out in a cold sweat."
Oh Good Lord...
"Asked my friend how his mom was doing at his moms funeral."
"Jesus Christ this is the worst one on this thread. What was his response?"
"He looked at me and then the casket and kind of smirked. I awkwardly started to try and explain and just said "I'm an idiot. You know I love you. Talk to you in a bit." He makes fun of me now and I can't stop laughing. It's a positive painful memory."
Own up to your mistakes. You'll garner more respect by acknowledging the awkward things you say, however, it's perfectly fine to laugh about it in the moment. That's probably the easiest way to escape the deep, deep shame.
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The advice "fake it til you make it," though often said with at least a hint of sarcasm, does carry quite a bit of wisdom.
By simply putting one foot in front of the other, weathering the chaos of not knowing what's happening as you learn as fast as possible, we can find ourselves further than we expected.
Once we're there, reaping the fruits of all our "faking," we somehow begin to take on a new identity in people's eyes They assume we've always been in control and known what was going on. They defer to us for advice.
But that couldn't be further from the truth. So we keep on faking it.
Redditor espectro11 asked:
"What's your 'I don't know, I didn't think I'd get this far' moment?"
Many Redditors discussed their experiences navigating the intimidating environment of job applications, interviews, and offers.
Oh Right, Getting Paid
"I gave my resume to fancy private school (I'm a teacher, but new to the field) and I didn't expect a call back. But they called me today to ask my expected salary and I said 'I don't know what the average is. Let me Google it.' "
"Ya girl was not prepared."
"When I went for a walk-in interview looking like crap and they hired me on the spot. I get they were hiring for a new store, but they up and said 'if you want the job it's yours, when can you start?' "
"Deada** didn't think I'd make it that far."
Outside the Box
"Years ago I was applying to a bunch of copywriting jobs and feeling frustrated because I wasnt hearing back from any of the places I was applying to."
"It was especially frustrating because I was putting in all this time on cover letters and I felt like nobody was even reading them, so I said, 'Fu** it, I'm gonna write one that is more me.' I thought it was a dumb idea and never imagined that it would work, but somehow it did."
"I applied with this cover letter and the subject line "Copywriter: Will Work for Beer" to a job that I was very underqualified for. It managed to catch the eye of the headhunter for the ad agency and was enough to get me an interview. Shortly after that I was hired and ended up working there for a few years, but I remember thinking on my first day, 'I can't believe that actually worked.' "
Just Not the Right Fit
"An interview at Google. The 20 years younger than me was describing the peer review system."
"I responded with 'Jesus, that sounds awful.' "
"I did not get the job."
Others also shared experiences that centered on their working lives. But these stories weren't about being hired or interviewed.
These were accounts of long-developing success stories that they never would have predicted.
A Winding Road
"My entire legal career"
"I have four degrees and a 10 year career in commerical litigation. I just wrapped up a $200mil trusts lawsuit."
"I started at uni doing theatre and stand up comedy. I have no fu**ing idea where I turned to get here."
"Started at a very small company doing sales straight out of college. I went about messaging big corporate players (who obviously would never do business with us since our size) and was laughed at by my new colleagues for even trying."
"2 weeks later My boss was asking me what we (a team of 6) should say on the conference call with Toshiba Buyers."
Putting Fires Out
"Me at work. I feel like every issue that comes up has me unprepared. But I am always praised for my good work."
"So, I assume I have imposter syndrome and keep doing what I am doing."
So next time you find yourself ruling a possibility out completely, maybe take just a few seconds to imagine it actually occurred and prepare.
You just never know.
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I'm going to be perfectly honest––I'm a city boy. I'm not a huge fan of hiking or camping. I happen to be a huge fan of running water. Have you heard of it? It's great. Highly recommended.
I've also, on a more humorous note, watched far too many horror films over the years and don't particularly like idea of running off into the woods only to piss off some demon that was perfectly fine until I arrived. I also have immense respect for our friendly neighborhood serial killers and demonstrate this regularly by staying out of their territory.
Those who love the great outdoors had plenty to share after Redditor Your_Normal_Loser asked the online community, "
Hikers of Reddit, what is the weirdest or creepiest thing you've come across while hiking?"
"The only reason..."
"When we were exploring the Australian Outback as university students, my friend and I found an old, tightly wrapped plastic bag with five or six damaged wallets along shrubbery at the base of a cliff.
The only reason we opened it up was because we were so remote - hundreds of kilometres from any town or tourist attraction - that it was strange to see garbage out there. All the cards were in female names and birthdates placed them in their late teens to early 20s. Some lived in the Northern Territory but one was in Sydney and another from Queensland. At the time we figured rock climbers must have stored their valuables in the bag and then lost track of it. I'll never forget the strange look the police officer gave us when we handed them in."
You see... this is why I wouldn't go mess around in the Australian Outback.
I also may or may not have watched Wolf Creek one too many times.
"A recliner on a small hill with a hole dug out in the middle and water bottles all over the place."
"A trashed campsite..."
"A trashed campsite complete with the tent cut open...
...do you report these things, or what?"
Or maybe not... you might want to turn back.
"The walls were completely plastered..."
"I was walking in a thick forest and came across an opening. In the center there was a shack made of lumber, with a bench built into it that was slightly leaned back.
The walls were completely plastered in porn."
Well... that's one way to get off.
"The man stopped talking..."
"I was backpacking with a few friends. A few days in the middle of nowhere, a man approached our camp as we were cooking dinner to say hi. We talked about our routes for a few minutes. Out of nowhere, he told us that he had had a vasectomy in his 30s after his 2nd child. Then somehow his wife had gotten pregnant with his 3rd child. He didn't believe this was possible, so he demanded a DNA test to see if he was actually the father. He was. Still, he explained that he had his doubts and thought that his wife must have fixed the DNA test.
My friends and I were in our 20s and had no idea why this guy was telling us this. We all just nodded and smiled.
The man stopped talking and then just walked away into the night."
"I stepped in..."
"I stepped in and fell over a cow carcass on a night hike. It was a bright moonlit night but I didn't see it in the shadows. Thankfully it was mostly dry."
"We still have no idea..."
"I was in the woods with three friends at night. A friend's house was nearby and I was getting hungry so I went inside to find some food. Another friend came inside with me. Two friends were still outside.
Later on, one of the two who outside came in and sees the indoor friend on the couch next to me. They panic and immediately run back outside.
I poke my head out the door asking what's going on, only to hear them yell as loudly as they can, "THAT'S NOT KEVIN"
Everyone comes inside and calms down a bit, and the story comes out. They thought the friend who was indoors with me (Kevin) had been outside with them this entire time. Why? Because in the darkness of the woods they saw a silhouette about the same height walking alongside them silently, then at some point it ran away and they were chasing it thinking Kevin was running off for some reason. The reason my friend yelled, "That's not Kevin" was to stop the last outdoor friend from chasing whoever was out there deeper into the woods.
We still have no idea who that was or why they didn't even speak."
This story sent a chill running down my spine.
Who was that?!
Perhaps figuring it out would be even scarier.
"Went hiking with my dad..."
"Went hiking with my dad one day over a ridge. A girl from the group in front of us tripped and slid down one side and was just able to hold on to the tiniest branch from the only tree around. Had she slid down all the way she certainly would be dead or massively injured!"
"I was trying to make my way across..."
"I was hiking in Washington sometime in December. I was trying to make my way across a river but the bridge was out. I was walking along the shore looking for a shallow spot but couldn't find one. I saw some footprints leading down the bank, my thought was that someone was trying to do what I was doing and decided to track the prints to see if they crossed. It was not easy but I followed the prints for about a mile. As I approached what looked like a crossing I heard a loud BANG like a stick hitting a tree. I froze for a few seconds and heard no other noises. I just slowly back up keeping my eyes on the other side of the river. Could not shake the feeling that I was being watched. Got the hell out of there quick as I could."
There are few feelings creepier than the feeling of being watched. It makes you feel like you've been violated in some way.
Thankfully you got out of there!
"I thought it was a magical, beautiful moment..."
"I was hiking with some friends, and I saw a cluster of butterflies on the ground. I thought it was a magical, beautiful moment until I realized they were congregating on a pool of blood. It turns out that someone had been hiking on the bluffs above earlier that day, and had fallen off and died."
Sooo... still want to go hiking or camping? None of this changed your mind? None of it?
It was nice knowing you. I'll stick with my running water.
Have some creepy stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below!
Have some experiences of your own? Have you also survived the hospitality industry? Feel free to tell us about it in the comments below!
Time is of the essence. And time is not definable. Those are lessons we learn as we get older; as times passes and fluctuates in front of us.
Time is always fleeting yet always catches up to us. I find myself shocked when I wake up on certain days and realize I'm a particular age of my parent that sticks out for me.
Like, how did that happen? I guess I should just be thankful I'm still here to witness it all.
Redditor u/TW1103 wanted to discuss the meaning... of time and all of its affects by asking:
What fact really puts the scale of time into an insane perspective?
Ok, who is watching the clock? Those seconds aren't going to count themselves. The only way to understand time is to be its witness. Although that can get depressing. Let's focus on the light and cool.
History...Calculate Figure It Out GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"If you are an 80-year-old American, you have lived through approximately 1/3 of our nation's entire history."
"The 80s were 40 years ago."
"This is what messes me up because I was born in 82 and graduated high school in 2000 so for some reason my brain is stuck on the 80's being twenty years ago. The 70's thirty years ago etc etc. I have to stop and realize sometimes that my concept of how long ago things happened is way off."
Time goes by...
"We observe that light travels at 186,000 miles a second, but given the vast size of the observable universe, that's a snail's pace. But from the point of view of a particle of light, time doesn't even exist."
"Time slows down as you approach the speed of light, and theoretically stops completely when you reach the speed of light."
Years Gone By...
"MLK Jr. and Anne Frank were born in the same year."
"Betty White was born in 1922. Automatically pre-sliced packaged bread loaves became commercially available in 1928. Betty White is six years older than sliced bread."
Long Live the Queen!queen elizabeth images GIFGiphy
"The queen and Marilyn Monroe would've been the same age."
I swear Liz is going to outlive dirt. Wait, I believe she already has. Well she won't be alone, she'll have Betty White. At least she better have Betty. Time is nothing without Queen Betty.
TV TimeSeason 2 Omg GIF by Paramount+Giphy
"Happy Days was a TV show made in the 1970s-80s about teenagers in the 1950s. Similarly, That 70s Show was made in the 90s-00s about teenagers in the 70s. If a similar show were to be made today, it would be about teenagers in the 2000s."
"If a T-Rex imagined a creature as ancient as the T-Rex is to us, it would be a Stegosaurus. If that Stegosaurus imagined a creature as ancient as the Stegosaurus is to us, it would be a Crocodile. If that Crocodile imagined a creature as ancient as that Crocodile is to us, it would be a Shark."
On the Clock
"On a twenty four hour clock the amount of time that humans have been on the earth would total around five seconds."
"How about this one: If Homo Habilus first appeared at midnight, 24 hours ago, that means the first Homo Sapiens appeared at 9:25 PM, or about 2 and a half hours ago. The first human civilization, in lower Mesopotamia, appeared at 11:57 PM, or about 3 minutes ago."
"The Western Roman Empire fell at 11:59 PM, or 1 minute ago. Everything that has happened since - the Crusades, the Plague, the discovery of the New World, the world wars, all of it - has happened in the last minute of human existence."
And that's just OUR Sun...
"The span of our lives are so insignificantly small that our Sun will last another 5 billion years. That's 9 zeros people. Our eldest live to around 100 in the best places. That's 50,000,000 (50 million) times longer than any person can reasonably expect to live. And that's just OUR Sun. The universe as a whole has probably existed for magnitudes longer than that already and will continue to exist until the end of time as we know it."
Tell Me a Storywilliam shakespeare GIF by will herringGiphy
"We know what a good storyteller Shakespeare was but there were Greek playwrights who wrote shows nearly 2,000 years earlier that are pretty good, too."
I hate time. Only because I'm petty and irritated of the amount I squandered. That's neither here nor there though. Time marches on and continues to amaze. I'll keep watching.
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