The good thing about the 21st Century? Options.
There are options everywhere. For food, there are options to the point that if you don't want to go somewhere, you're under no obligation.
But also in this capitalist 21st century, our business is valuable. And if we share the reasons why we don't eat at certain places, we may persuade a ton of people away from that place too.
Lesson Well LEarned
Chili's. I went a few years ago with my mom and made the horrible decision to get a side of chili lime rice. I ate maybe three bites because it didn't taste good. Those three bites didn't seem to get along well with my body AT ALL. Unfortunately, Chili's was the first stop before hitting the store to do our weekly grocery shopping. At the store, I had to make a run for the bathroom twice. After we finally checked out, my mom made a suggestion that maybe I should make another stop there before we drove home since it would take at least 20 minutes. I declined even though my stomach was turning, thinking I could make it home (and would rather use that toilet than a public one). BIG MISTAKE.
About five minutes into the drive home, I realized that I needed to get to a toilet or I would ruin my mom's car forever. After telling her this, she tells me there's nowhere to stop yet since we were in a residential area. I ask if we can stop at a family friend's house which is close by, and she agrees. She tells me to give them a call so they can unlock the door and save me a few seconds. I explain to her that if I move to grab my phone from my pocket, her car interior would be ruined. The five minute drive there feels like forever and I'm clenching my butt for dear life.
We finally get there and I bolt up the porch stairs to knock on their door. No answer. At this point, I'm desperate. I knock again and finally hear someone coming. Right as the door opens, my muscles give out. The friends stare as me as I spew liquid excrement all over their porch. I'm just standing there still making a mess everywhere and the husband grabs a hose to start spraying me and his porch down.
A few minutes later, my mom emerges from the car, crying laughing, with a roll of paper towels in hand like that's going to help now. Eventually, I'm able to make it to the friends bathroom (which I somehow managed to clog after pooping on their porch) and wash up. They ended up giving me some clothes to change into and I was able to get home and shower the poop off. Unfortunately, you can't shower off embarrassment and shame. So, I will never step foot in a Chili's again because I don't fancy pooping on a family friend's porch again.
Germy Germy Germy
Any self serve buffet. Kids are nasty and not all parents watch their kids. Saw a kid lick a serving spoon and put it back. Glad I caught it but imagine how often it isn't caught.
When Seafood Attacks
Seven or eight years ago, I was at a big medical trade show in Anaheim, CA and after a day of hanging out in the vendor booth, I decided to have dinner at Bubba Gump Shrimp. About 4 or 5 hours after eating there, I came down with the nastiest case of food poisoning I have ever experienced. Alone in a hotel room after hours of throwing up, I called an ambulance, which I couldn't afford but was desperate for help. The doctor at the hospital thought shellfish fit the profile. For some reason can still eat shrimp, but never again at Bubba Gump.
Two Against Chili's
My Dad placed a family boycott on Chili's because they had terrible service once and refused our never used gift cards
About 15 or so years later my dad was forced into going to Chili's while on a business trip and put an end to the boycott. Then he spilled ketchup on his pants and announced the boycott was back on.
In my 22 years I think I've been to Chili's 3 times, and there is one down the road from me.
Golden Coral. We've got a family joke where if someone recommends a restaurant we wait until later in the conversation and ask if they like Golden Coral. If they say yes we never try the place they recommended
There is a local Mediterranean all-you-can-eat place that I have never eaten at, and refuse to try, but not for the reason you probably think. It was in a weirdly dingy, broken-down building that never has anybody parked out front and has almost never had anybody in it. This place is surrounded on all sides by significantly nicer restaurants and businesses, which just makes it stand out even more.
Here's the real kicker for why I don't go in: this place is near where I work so I have literally seen it every day. In the seven years I've known of its existence, almost every restaurant around it has folded and gone out of business at least once before coming back as something else. Yet this place has somehow survived despite having no obvious signs of doing business; I believe it's a money laundering front. My suspicions have doubled since last year when the building they were in got a suddenly an upgrade and renovated the building to be much nicer than every building around it; again, this is at a place where I think I have maybe seen a dozen people parked outside of, ever.
Not any in particular, but there was one case worthy of bringing up. Was on the road from the airport to our lodgings in Jacksonville area. Wife wanted to eat, so we saw a Denny's and stopped. I went into the bathroom to freshen up. While doing my business, I noticed the 2 stalls were occupied. No big deal, I finish up just as the one guy leaves. In the mirror I see him. With a cook's apron on. Didn't stop to wash his hands. I got out and immediately got my wife to leave with me.
My dad refuses to eat at Papa Murphy's because when I was in high school I applied there, had an interview, and was told I was hired and that they would contact me with starting info, then never contacted me.
Applebee's. My grandparents used to force our whole family to go there at ever family get together. It's just over priced tv dinners. Half the menu isn't even edible, a quesadilla burger makes no sense, you can't even hold it!
Tim Hortons. Every single time I went it was a letdown. The food quality has been declining for years and their coffee tastes like it's been pumped right out of the sewers.
Also, they treat their employees like absolute bunk and their franchise owners have been known to throw childish tantrums over the slightest wage increases.
Life is just fraught with the rumors.
The older you get the more you learn about how easily duped we all are.
Who comes up with some of this nonsense?
And why are we so gullible?
Maybe because we don't learn to Google until we're at least 6.
It is time to eradicate some of these silly lies about hazards and danger.
We are more secure than we want the other person next to us to know.
Redditor AirAmbitious530wanted to know what certain parts of life we don't have to fret about. They asked:
"What things are said to be dangerous but are actually safe?"
I feel like this a lot of danger in the world. But that's just a given with living.
Sky HighTraveling On My Way GIF by NeighborlyNotary®Giphy
"Flying is safer than riding in a car by a long shot, right?"
"The most dangerous part about flying is driving to/from the airport."
"I suspect that myth about how long gum stays in your system came to be because of a misunderstanding. Probably someone laid out some fact like, 'It would take your body seven years to break down bubblegum.' Then some dumba** decided that meant it would stay inside you for seven years because he had never heard of pooping before."
In the Mist
"Gorillas. There are zero instances of a human ever being killed by a gorilla in the wild in all of history. They are peaceful herbivores. If you came across a gorilla in the wild just don't be a fool and respect its space. Don't look in its eyes, don't show your teeth, and just overall act submissive and non-threatening and you will be fine."
"Movies like Planet of the Apes and Congo really got people thinking gorillas are these rampaging beasts just waiting to tear you limb from limb. https://youtu.be/Ld8qkDKl89g"
"Eating food after the best before date."
"My country has a 'Best Before' and a 'Use By' label. If it's marked Best Before it's going to be fine to eat after the date, it's probably just going to suck. Common 'best before' foods include canned foods, cereals, biscuits, sauces, chocolate, sugar, flour and frozen foods."
"Use by means you shouldn't consume it after that date. Common 'use by' foods include milk, sliced ham and shaved meats."
"Eating seeds of watermelon/apples. Would take literal lbs of them to kill you."
Seeds? Seeds are suppose to be dangerous? Never heard that one. Not that I'm a seed eater.
MOOOOOoooooo....Dairy Cow GIF by Milk MoovementGiphy
"Sharks, they’re a lot safer than movies like Jaws make them seem."
"Statically you're more likely to die by cow than a shark."
"Cracking your knuckles - there's absolutely no link to arthritis, people just say that because they hate the sound."
"I used to crack my knuckles when I’d get waxed. Just to take the sensation away and try and focus on something else. The lady that waxed me would always yell at me about how dangerous it is, maybe she just hated the sound too. But we’re even for the pain then haha."
Inside the Squall
"I'm seriously wondering if 'taking a shower during a thunder storm' should be on this list. I've always heard it was dangerous, but I've never in my life heard of anyone being harmed by it."
"I don't know about showering but back when we still had corded phones my aunt was talking to someone when lightning hit the phone line. She had burns on her ear and hand and her hair caught fire. She was, of course very shaken but not seriously injured. She was the first person in the family to get a cell phone."
8 Legged Issues
"I remember seeing a tarantula in the grass when I was a kid. I went in close to look at it, and it turned to me and reared up, fanning its legs out to look intimidating. Then it immediately fell on its back. Totally shattered the tough guy image."
From Abovecat skydiving GIFGiphy
"Sky diving is a lot more safe than people think."
"Correct. It's been a long time since I looked at the numbers but IIRC the vast majority of skydiving deaths are experienced jumpers pushing the limits of their skill/equipment. Deaths among first time and students was incredibly low."
Life isn't as scary as you might think. You just have to have faith.
I find I have less time and patience and interest for absolutely everything.
The years we add, the more we recognize all of the flaws.
Our flaws and life's.
Redditorvieps about what parts of life we tend to find ourselves over with each passing year. They asked:
"What becomes less interesting as you age?"
I'm over always staying positive. Bleh. Who needs it?
Winnersteam winning GIFGiphy
"Who won. Who won any crappy argument. I'm in my 60s and when I hear someone winding up to tell me a story that features 'then I saidxxxx then SHE saidxxx'.... my brain stops."
"Other people's opinions of you."
"Yeah, I love being 40 and having self belief. You can only hold back and have been right so many times before you learn to speak up, and stop giving a sh*t what people might say."
"Yes, came here to say this. Ultimately, only you can make yourself happy and that starts with loving yourself and not caring about other people’s opinions."
"I think it starts to creep in when you hit like 30, even. You still put in the effort, but you don't just closely follow trends. Especially not fashion trends. I mean it's getting popular to dress like mall goths again."
"That was lame the first time around. We're just stuck on a 20 year cycle for fashion. Baggy pants are coming back as well. Which is another dumb one, to me. Don't get me wrong, skinny jeans were a bad idea for like 90% of people. They looked good on skinny people. Not so great on others. But baggy pants just look bad on most people, to me."
I May Die
"This, yeah. The next day sucks now. Usually I strictly limit myself to 2 drinks a night, and rarely drink more than 2-3 nights in a given week."
"Here a couple months ago I'd had a particularly bad week, said f**k it, and decided to just relax and not pay attention to how much I was drinking. All was fine till I stood up. Queue stumbling across the house to the bathroom and waking up in the hallway the next morning thinking I was gonna die. I don't remember getting drunk being like that 20 years ago."
Who Cares?Very Funny Oops GIF by America's Funniest Home VideosGiphy
"Once you hit 21, there aren’t many more exciting milestones (in the US). At 25 you can rent a car but that’s it."
I try to keep celebrating each year, but I grow more and more tired. I feel that one.
"freedoms"free freedom GIFGiphy
"Adulthood and the associated 'freedoms.' When I was a teen I was so excited about getting to be an adult and drive where I wanted and drink and all that crap. Now I just wanna stay home and watch cartoons LMAO."
I'll get pissed...
"Mindgames in relationships."
"I am very fortunate that I found a wife who never played mind games to begin with, and I never cared, so that has never been an issue in our relationship. We've been together for 33+ years and will celebrate our 30th in three months, and we've elevated our relationship to these micro conflicts."
"Like, she can say something, I'll get pissed, I'll say something back, we go into this split second mode of anger at each other, and literally, 5 seconds later, we're fine. She'll say, 'You're a jerk', I'll say, 'But you nag', and the whole thing is completely defused and over."
"It's the way we are, we're best friends, we're equals in that we trust each others judgement and our decisions are generally mutual. I know it sounds boring, but it's awesome that the most important thing for us that gets less interesting as we age is conflict and an inability to compromise."
All of It
"Literally everything. Especially people's opinions."
"I'm 14 and I don't care what others think already... mostly my 'motto' would be 'if it doesn't hurt anyone then it's fine,' no I don't care if you give me that weird look when I make a contraption on the side of my desk out of used correction tape, if it gives me a place to put my pens then I'm keeping it, I'm starting to feel old."
The older you get, the less impressed/interested you are with basically everything. Once you see all the world's gimmicks for what it is, the rose colored glasses start falling off. What got me excited as a 20 year old, does not spark any joy for me a decade later. My motto 'if your past self doesn't make you cringe, you aren't growing.'"
Over ItOh The Drama GIF by MOODMANGiphy
"Real life drama. I cannot stand listening to people gossip & talk about who is fighting with who. Who slept with who. Who did this & that. idgaf. You're grown & still acting like you're in high school. it's embarrassing."
Life goes on. Life moves on. 'Tis the way...
For the most part, our pets get treated extremely well. They are fed, bathed, played with, cooed over, and are treated like part of the family.
Some pets get even more comforts awarded to them, such as luxurious beds, copious amounts of toys, and amazing food. My best friend rents a three-bedroom apartment just so her dog and cat can have their own rooms!
However, sometimes we're not always the best caretakers. Most of us don't intend to neglect our pets or any part of their care. However, a combination of unfounded internet advice, our pet's favorable reactions, and sometimes even plain old hubris, lead us to make decisions that aren't in the best interest of our furry friends.
Luckily, veterinarians are here to tell us the proper way to care for our pets.
This is all thanks to Redditor Feeling2Leafy who asked:
"Veterinarians of Reddit, what do pet owners ignore the most?"
Feed Them Right
"Husbandry advice, but dietary advice in general. I see a lot of animals being fed inappropriate diets, which owners will refuse to stop feeding because "the animal likes it.""
"My neighbours used to feed their dogs bread with butter and meat. Over the past 15 years they killed 3 dogs like that and dont want to admit that their way of feeding is the problem"
"Yup this annoys me especially since even Google will tell them what they are feeding them is wrong or just plan bad."
Start Young, Start Early
"I believe that the finest thing you can do for your new pet, particularly a puppy or kitten, is to handle it frequently when it is young. Getting them used to having their feet handled, nails trimmed, mouths opened (even more benefit if you get them used to brushing their teeth daily - gold standard for at-home dental care), ears touched (especially breeds prone to ear infections - huge benefit in the future if you have to administer topical ear medication)... Restraint is also crucial. I constantly advise my clients to train their animals to be restrained. Because it hasn't learned to be okay with restraint, that wriggly puppy that is cute when it nips when you hold it grows up to be a massive dog that can't be properly examined."
"Thank you for mentioning restraint. Restraint's very important in making sure pets can coincide with their environments!"
And Don't End At Old
"Teeth and quality of life in older senior animals."
"I can definitely agree that senior animals need more care than some people realize."
Dogs Are Not Accessories
""People who carry their toy breeds everywhere and feed them human food instead of dog food... they are killing their pets slowly.""
"My vet said this to me as we were as we were walking our dogs on the beach. Apparently lots of small breeds get very little exercise and are extremely overweight."
Of Course It Hurts!
"Obesity and sadly, pain. I have met many owners who have had lame dogs for weeks and didn’t think the animal was in pain. Sometimes we have even discovered after X-rays that the animal has a fracture."
"My favourite is when clients come in to get the stitches removed from their dogs spey and hand back the pain meds (that they paid for???) for us to dispose of because “I didn’t need to give any, she wasn’t in any pain”"
"Like I’m sure having your guts cut open and an organ ripped out is just a walk in the park for you, but I think fluffy would have appreciated some pain relief"
Greens Aren't Always Good
"Look up what plants are toxic to your pet! You'd be surprised what common house plants are incredibly deadly to your fuzzball."
"An example is lilies for cats, getting some pollen on their fur and licking it up or drinking water out of the vase is enough to cause deadly kidney failure in a few days. Check the plants you have and deal with the toxic ones. I got rid of my peace lilies before I got my cat. You could also place them somewhere your pet can't get at them (off limits room, behind glass, hang it out of reach, etc.) Though that carries a risk of accidents."
Sometimes The Best Thing Is The Hardest Thing
"This might not be the most ignored, but it’s the one that if ignored cause the most suffering.
"Deciding the time to put your pet to sleep. Some people tell us that “they aren’t ready”, which is sad, and I know it’s going to be the hardest choice you’ll ever need to make regarding your little one."
"But the hard truth is, it’s not about you."
"If your pet is crying all night, not eating without you force feeding one bit at a time, and can’t even walk on it’s own, it’s time. Most of the time our animals tell us when they’re ready, and they trust that you’ll do what’s best for them."
"We have an amazing opportunity with animals, which is to let them go when their quality of life just isn’t there anymore, and selfish owners that refuse just because they “can’t handle it yet” is half the reason why working in the industry will not be long term for me."
Be Willing To Do The Work
"The top one for me (and I’m sure it’s been mentioned somewhere) is a rabbits general needs. Dietary, husbandry, and housing. Rabbits have so many needs that need to be met- they are not easy animals! They have burrowing needs, hay and straw are necessary, so many vegetables they cannot be fed or shouldn’t be in high amounts that people ignore, and the majority of hutches they are kept in do not meet their needs!"
"My friend specialises in rabbits and the stories I’ve heard from her are just terrible. Please do genuine research into rabbits before you buy them or ask a vet advice."
Vaccinate, Vaccinate, Vaccinate
"Not a vet, but worked at a clinic. vaccine schedules. You want to go as soon as your pet is due, don't wait a few months or even a few weeks. We had a clients dog die of lepto because they were behind in the vaccine. Preventatives are another. You need them year round, bc fleas and ticks still come out and heart worm is not something to f**k with"
Rehome, Don't Dump And Run
"Please give your unwanted pets up for adoption, or at least put a little effort into giving your pets a future home. Summer is season for abandoning pets in the wild, even though many wont survive in nature, let alone the cold climate in some countries."
"You have responsibilities ffs... Just because the poor pet suddenly doesn't fit into your lives, it doesn't mean it has to suffer."
"It's one of the few things that I just cannot empathize with is dumping a pet. Needing to rehome a pet, absolutely, we all end up in situations that we couldn't have foreseen and my heart breaks for anyone faced with that decision, but then take it to a rescue. There is NEVER an excuse to dump an animal in the wild for any reason."
Okay, so those people are deliberately evil, and we don't need a vet to tell us not to abandon a pet.
However, a lot of this advice is really useful. We all love our pets, and now we know how to take care of them better!
I once had a man at a party very assertively tell me exactly what he wanted to do to me before my facial expression (I'm guessing absolute disgust) made him pause and awkwardly ask:
"Wait... how old are you?"
I was twelve. Turned out he was one of my dad's friends.
It was ... icky.
Reddit user KairoLlyr asked:
"What is the most awkward question you've ever been asked?"
I'm not alone in having people ask some seriously awkward stuff. Neither are you.
No Chance To Answer.
"When I was about 13, my mom and I were watching a parrot demonstration in front of a Rainforest Cafe. Another woman watching turned to me and said, 'May I?'."
"Immediately, with no further explanation, she took a strand of my long hair and held it out to the bird, who bit it. I was just standing there with my hair in a bird's mouth. We didn't know what to do. One of the weirder things that's happened to me."
"Id love to suddenly find myself standing there, a part of me inexplicably in a birds mouth."
"Wow. Just. Wow."
So Did You?Loop Spinning GIF by WWEGiphy
" 'You look strong, can we wrestle?' - a man in the grocery store"
“Only if there’s a prize”
"Did he mean right then and there, or out in the parking lot?"
Great Ice Breaker
"At the grocery store picking out some lunch meat (not from the deli, just some plain ole Oscar Meyer) when a man sidles up uncomfortably close to me and after a moment says, 'So….what do you think about the ham?'."
"Idk I think he was pretty smooth"
"Ok, there are some creepy ones here. There are some funny ones too. This one... this is definitely the straight up weirdest one."
Good LuckJim Carrey Flirting GIFGiphy
" 'Hey man, mind if I squeeze in to try for her number?."
"Dude wanting to hit on my wife whilst sitting together at the bar."
"You could have said 'You can try but I hear she's married."
"Just hope she says I'm married to this guy over here. You have a smug smile on your face, more smug than Jeremy clarkson."
" 'Told ya buddy, I hear she's married'."
"Haha had something similar happen to me with my girlfriend. I told him good luck and watched him crash and burn as she turned around grabbed my waist and said she was taken. God love her."
"I have no sense of smell, and multiple people have seriously asked me why I have a nose."
"My wife is anosmic, and has had legit had "so if you were in a room full of poisonous gas, you wouldn't die?" because apparently it's the smell that kills you in that scenario."
"That’s when you shoot back with a retort about their brain. I’ll let you get creative, you got this 👍"
"Same. I have no sense of smell. People nowadays just ask if I have co-vid."
Damn It Grandma!Arrested Development Flirt GIFGiphy
"Do you want to marry someone pretty like your sister?"
"~My grandmother, while all of us were in one room together"
"My grandmother once decided to tell me my teenage cousin’s bra size and how proud she was. An aunt had to rescue me from that conversation."
That's the most awkward one. You can't even say yes so your answer won't make sense"
" 'I'd rather date someone with personality, unlike my sister'."
Lack Of Melanin
"How come you're not black?""
"A 5 year old asked me this while I was teaching preschool. He was black. My assistant teacher and his one-on-one were also black. They both started laughing while my brain reset itself trying to think of a good answer and also trying not to laugh."
"I taught in south Memphis for a while and i was the only white person in the building. I had multiple kids ask me “when did you turn white?” and when i got pregnant, when my baby would turn black like she’s supposed to. For the vast majority of them i was the first white person they’d ever encountered."
First Language...english snl GIFGiphy
" 'How was it learning a new language?'... We actually speak English in New Zealand"
"I believe it's called the Common Speech in Middle Earth."
"My friend once introduced me to his new girlfriend that he met on a trip while in Asia. After talking a bit, I complimented her on how good her English was. She still had an accent and all but it was pretty perfect. She just responded 'it’s my first language, we speak English in Singapore'."
"My friends just gave it a chuckle and moved on but I don’t think I ever fully processed the embarrassment."
Best Way To Answer
"I have wide shoulders and large breasts and a guy sitting next to me on a flight, after he had a couple drinks, asked, 'Home grown or silicone?' I told him I carried extra sanitary napkins in my bra in case I got my period."
"I want you to be my best friend! ROTFL! The best way to answer a shocking question is to give an equally shocking answer. If that did not turn him off, nothing would. You should have added you have periods heavy enough to float an adult diaper!"
"I like that comeback"
"Mutual embarrassment is the only solution, but I pity you that you were stuck on a flight with that guy and didn't get to leave after that zinger. It would have been the cherry on top. Now I just imagine two awkward people sitting in silence for the rest of the flight."
"It does feel like you're a captive there but he did ignore me after that."
A Bit Personalcanadian what GIF by CBCGiphy
"My husband is 6’11 and I was meeting one of his coworkers for the very first time."
"I told the coworker is was nice to meet him and the very first question that came out of his mouth was, ‘How endowed is your husband? Is he really big?’ "
"If that wasn’t enough he tried to get me to tell him by measuring the length of his thigh and moving his hands together or apart for comparison."
"That dude was totally into your man girl! I would have said, However you've imagined it, thats exactly how it is. And I will fight you. LoL"
"Lol, my boyfriend is 6’5 and I got this from a coworker too!"
“ 'So.. is it proportional? He looks like it’d be proportionate'."
Admittedly, none of my awkward moments have ended up with any part of me inside a strange birds mouth (familiar bird mouths only) - but I'm betting some of you out there have some awkward doozies.
Serve em up in the comments!