Like it or not, life will deal you a bad hand from time to time. A mark of adulthood is being able to successfully deal with the problems that arise as you make your way through society. But what if no one ever taught you how to stick to a budget and track your credit score? What do you do if you've never been taught how to shop smart and eat balanced meals? How do you forge rewarding relationships when you've never learned how to stand up for yourself and establish boundaries? And how do you get by when you feel your countrymen have failed you?
After Redditor omfghewontkndle asked the online community, "What's a problem absolutely no one prepared you for?" people weighed in with their observations. Some are more sobering than others.
"Your teeth suddenly going bad..."
Your teeth suddenly going bad after age 30 when you've never had a cavity or any other dental issues in your life up to that point. Getting them fixed is expensive as hell, even with insurance.
"Everything in the media made it seem..."
Being in an abusive relationship as a male.
Everything in the media made it seem like it was only a female problem, which obviously sounds absurd, but it was never something I expected to happen to me. Any time you see a man getting getting abused in a movie or a TV show it is shown as physical comedy or as some kind of catharsis.
"Death is an abstract concept..."
Burying a parent changes you irrevocably. Parents die three deaths in my opinion: your perception of them as a remnant of your childhood as an invincible, indomitable mother or father, your present perception of them as your friend and resilient adult parent, and their final physical death where their vulnerability and fallibility is made almost callously apparent. The subsequent grief is so palpable, it emanates from your very being. Grief requires no announcements, we all feel it.
It's difficult to articulate the density of the desolation when your mother or father dies. Estranged parents and children, or children who resent their parents maybe cannot empathise but you'll still feel the elegiac loneliness.
Death is an abstract concept to people who've never lost anyone; it's refied through the death of a loved one.
"You hear about it as a kid..."
Worsening mental illness. You hear about it as a kid and think "sucks for those people."
Yeah, it sucks pretty bad.
"That's a new level of horror."
Being bullied by complete strangers.
Look, when you are in school, you have to deal with bullying by students in your class/grade. It's horrible, but it's something you got to deal with it (although I don't like the idea of "ignoring" bullying and having them eventually getting bored with you. Doesn't work. And your bullies are in control of your life).
But when complete strangers are harassing you? By kids who aren't even in your class/grade? Who are calling you by your name, so you know this is a personal attack, not a "that guy looks weird, let's f*** with him" scenario? That's a new level of horror.
"I was watching some neighbor kids..."
Not being able to feel things as strongly as when I was a kid.
I was watching some neighbor kids having a water fight earlier in the summer, and I swear the range of emotions they went through in a 5 minute period was more intense than what I've felt in the last year.
"Because they know you'll quit eventually..."
Employment. Work hard and do well and you'll be rewarded was the story I got. Turns out I should have been told to learn how to work okayish, be good at blaming others, and be awesome at sucking up to bosses. Only do well enough that it passes, and sell it like it's better than sex. That way, when you get promoted, you can leave behind a mess and ensure your successor won't catch up to you, while you work out the game for the next level.
Since I'm not an amoral authoritarian, I'm never gonna get promoted. And never have. It is a race thing as well, sure, but it doesn't help that I find the game repulsive as well. And those of us who work hard and do a good job? We just get burnt out being used by the guys cheating the system.
Thus, for the past two decades I just work only hard enough. Only good enough. To not be fired. I give it my okayest try and I save my energy so I can enjoy my life outside of work.
The business field doesn't want us workers to get anything more than they have to give. So do not give them any more than you have to. Why do you think they demand 110%!!! and hype up effort and more more more more numbers!!!! eh? Because they know you'll quit eventually cause you aren't gonna get anything.
"Being taught growing up..."
Being taught growing up that your country is a paragon of human rights & democracy, and that it is utterly infallible. And to now only to feel utterly and completely helpless as I watch it fall to the ideologies of hate.
"I remember I couldn't wait..."
How alone you'd feel the first nights on your own.
I remember i couldn't wait to get out on my own, i tried moving to edmonton, with no plan really, we were sleeping in our truck trying to find a place, and i remember laying there, thinking about my lil brother, my ma and dad, how i was just in high school, a kid, and now im here alone. I wasn't prepared for how hard that'd hit.
"Meanwhile, you have to compete..."
Getting a job. Turns out that doing well in college isn't enough, you need tons of experience to even get entry-level jobs. Meanwhile, you have to compete with tons of people with good grades in college and even more experience than you to get said entry-level jobs.
"Our education system does not allow students..."
Your career path or path in general. Everyone just tells you to go to college if you don't want to be broke and that's what "normal" people do. Our education system does not allow students to think critically and independently. All you need to do in school is to do your assignment and pass your exam. Teachers never tell you there're thousands of possibilities in life other than going to college and have a desk job. I think almost everyone is the victim of this education system. That's why so many people nowadays have quarter/mid-life crisis and other mental issues.
"Not being able..."
Not being able to get a good job because no one will give me experience even though I worked hard to get a degree. My parents have no friends with white collar jobs, and I don't know anyone either so I can even start networking.
The realization that an aunt I was once very close to is a racist in clear denial.
I'm a white man engaged to a black woman, and this aunt has said some very problematic things both to my fiancé in the past and in public conversations with a blatantly racist man on Facebook recently.
"I'm a lot more prepared these days..."
Packing my bag and walking out the door with nowhere to go.
I was going through a divorce at the time, despite it being an amicable split we were not getting along and she asked me to leave. Our marriage had alienated me from my family and my friends were not in a position to offer me a place to sleep.
I'm a lot more prepared these days. I know where local Shelters are, I know my rights as a tenant and I have my own savings account which I am very diligent about. The memory of how I felt on that first day though, that occasionally keeps me up at night.
"At least I can say..."
Sexual assault. You never think it's going to happen to you until it does. It's very tough to navigate on your own. Who do you call? Who do you tell? Where's the line? How do you deal with the anger and frustration when the police are no help? At least I can say I learned first hand how f***** up the justice system is.
"Living in one of the most privileged..."
Living in one of the most privileged, wealthy countries in the world but having 180,000 people die of a known virus inside of 6 months because the reality TV star president doesn't believe in science.
"You hear people talk about..."
Addiction and depression. You hear people talk about that sort of stuff, but it's all hypothetical and rather distant, especially when they tell you during your younger years. Then once those issues hit, it's like everything that you remember and were told is just BS, since the real experience varies so differently from what people who have never had depression or never been an addict told you.
"Coming to realize..."
Coming to realize how much was hidden from you by your parents. And having to accept a diagnosis passed down by genetics.
"End the cycle!"
So much shame. The root of all these things we weren't taught comes down to shame. End the cycle! Teach your kids about sex and mental health and failure and relationship and f***** up people and periods and self love! Honesty for the sake of growth and peace and fulfilling lives!
"It wasn't until I was older..."
Willfully ignorant people. I was raised with the opinion that people are smart in different ways. Like skillsets versus general intelligence. It was a nice way to say everybody has something to offer.
It wasn't until I was older where I watched people actively avoid knowledge to maintain an incorrect viewpoint.
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Don't be alarmed: There are some terrible corporations out there (looking at you, Nestle) but there are also some great brands that are selling decent products.
I know, surprising, right? Maybe we've all just gotten used to brands selling things of questionable quality that when we stumble across something worthwhile it stuns us.
Hold on tight when you find a brand deserving of your loyalty!
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor spwf asked the online community,
"What brand(s) do you swear by and why?"
"Their cast iron pans..."
"Lodge. Their cast iron pans are super durable and can last a lifetime."
Not just a lifetime. Your Lodge cast iron will outlive you, if (and even if you don’t) take care of it. Even if they get rusty they can be resurfaced. And damn is it satisfying to resurface a forgotten cast iron pan.
Asics, specifically the Gel-Nimbus series. I've suffered from joint pain and unbearable plantar fasciitis from a relatively young age... These shoes are life savers. Very pricey and I don't love the look of tennis shoes of any type but nevertheless I will praise these shoes to the end of days. Hopefully, I will always be able to afford them once a year.
Glad to hear you've found some much-needed relief!
"Warranty and service..."
"Victorinox. Excellent pocket knives, multi tools and their kitchen knives are probably the best ones you can get under 100 USD. Warranty and service is top notch."
Anyone who cooks, but can't afford or doesn't want to invest in a professional-grade chef's knife should get a Victorinox. They aren't nearly as good as a top tier professional chef's knife, but they are night and day compared with everything else in their price range.
"This one brand..."
"This one brand of granola bars called Sunbelt Bakery. Every other granola bar brand is so dry I can't eat them anymore."
Yes, these are so good! An excellent choice.
"Dickies. High quality pants. They're meant to be work pants so they're pretty durable and breathe well. Very comfortable."
"High quality" is right. Those pants last forever.
"It helps clean..."
"Dawn dishsoap. It helps clean dishes and it's great when one of my kids has an accident and I have to wash their clothes. Sometimes leaves a small stain but no smell. It has saved so many outfits."
Fantastic – it sounds like you should be their salesperson.
"They don't use..."
"New Balance. They don't use slave labor to make shoes."
They are comfortable and fit well.
I personally still don't like the aesthetics of many of their shoes, but still recommend them to people who want a good shoe.
"They are a retailer..."
"REI. Stand behind everything in their store. They are a retailer but you can beat something up they sell and they give you a full refund."
Many people use them for shoes, for camping gear... all kinds of stuff. They're very reliable.
"I wear my Timberland boots..."
"I wear my Timberland boots almost every day, I’ve had them for almost ten years, and they’re still just about as sturdy as they were the day I bought them."
These shoes tend to last forever. "Durable" is the perfect word.
"One large bottle..."
"Dr. Bronner's Castile soap. One large bottle lasts me about a year and I use it for everything. No toxic BS in them like pretty much every other soap and they smell fantastic."
"Also when I say everything I really mean it. All purpose cleaner, dish soap, body wash, shampoo, carpet extractor wash, dog shampoo, it’s called 18 in 1 for a reason."
If you're interested in the story behind the company, the documentary Dr. Bronner's Magic Soapbox might be right up your alley.
See? Not all brands are terrible. After reading about some of these, it might be time to change of your buying habits.
Have some suggestions of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!
You know what would be great?
If society could just stop with arbitrary dress codes. If you're not working with the public, why should you have to dress up so much? If you're a police officer, then it makes sense that you'd wear a uniform that identifies you as a police officer. If you're Ted from IT who sits in the backroom all day, I really don't see why you have to come in every day in a suit and tie.
Let's just toss them out, shall we?
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Levels2ThisBrush asked the online community,
"What should be socially acceptable but isn't?"
"Leaving the office..."
"Leaving the office whenever you've finished your tasks for the day."
This is why I'm so glad remote work is the new office.
"And yet, I get it!"
"Taking off sick from work, WITHOUT giving an invasive reason. I supervise a small team and so I see all the OOO emails, and for gods sake I want people to PLEASE not feel the need to explain in detail what kind of diarrhea is afflicting them, or how bad their period cramps are, or how much bad sushi they ate the night before. Just say “I’m under the weather, I won’t be online today.”"
"And yet, I get it! I do it too! I feel guilty or like I’ll be looked at with suspicion if my reason for taking off isn’t sufficiently debilitating enough!"
"But… we need to stop this. As a manager I don’t care, I don’t THINK the people above me who are also on these emails care… let’s just all agree to take sick days without any details from now on!"
I do not miss my retail days where I had to organise someone to cover me and beg on bended knee.
"Cashiers or workers who don’t need to be standing all day not having a stool or chair."
Another thing I do not miss from my retail days. Having to stand for hours and hours only to come home with my feet killing me was not fun.
"Prices on apartments..."
"Prices on apartments and their respectable reasons for such price directly on their websites or advertising without the need for a tour or any secrecy."
I always assume if I have to ask the price I probably can’t afford it.
"Being quiet/not wanting to engage in conversation all the time."
In Finland, if somebody tries to talk to you, they are probably a tourist.
"Choosing not to..."
"Choosing not to have toxic family members in your life."
It feels very liberating once you accept that you don't have to put up with it.
"Employees calling customers out in public for being a**holes."
Absolutely. Many customers get away with treating employees horribly because they know they can do it without any pushback... most of the time.
"The fact that I sometimes..."
"The fact that I sometimes need to take my insulin in public. No, Karen, I am not doing drugs, I need to live."
You’re getting that sweet sweet insulin high… the high of being not-dead.
"Afternoon naps. I’m on team nap. Give me 25 minutes to charge up and I’ll give you back 3 hours of high quality work. Everyone wins. Plus I go home with extra energy instead of dead tired."
Short naps don't work for me. I can't do a 25 min recharge. When I take a nap it needs to be like a solid 2 hours
"Salary transparency. For some reason, in the US, there’s a taboo or stigma around discussing one’s salary. This should be done openly and freely, with zero embarrassment or judgment. The only winners from avoiding these conversations are the corporations that are able to pay people differently for the same roles. Speak up!"
The "for some reason" you're referring to is simply propaganda on behalf of corporations.
It's evident that something's got to change around here, and we're mad as hell and we're not going to take it anymore!
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
As much as many of us don't like to disrupt the status quo, there is only so much time a person can tolerate a miserable situation before things become so unbearable that they ultimately have to peace out.
For some people, it takes a while for them to reach a breaking point. Eventually, there comes a time when they realize their self-worth is more important than continuing to please others who don't appreciate them for the sake of keeping up with appearances.
Curious to hear from people whose patience ran thin and made a strong decision, Reddit Prestigious-Order-62 asked:
"What made you say 'f'k this sh*t im out?'"
The unwarranted reprimanding was something that was never mentioned in the initial job description.
"In the late 90’s."
"One time I got pulled into the Security office at a Department store I worked at. They accused me of constantly using the sales day coupons for people that didn’t present one (we always kept an extra copy at each register). I had watched my own department boss do it many times so I assumed it was okay. We didn’t even collect the coupons to be counted for the cash office, we just chucked them after use."
"They claimed I lost the store hundreds of dollars and had been watching me 'for months' do this awful, unforgivable crime for people spending 90 bucks on already bloated price designer jeans. I’m sure the occasional 10% discount was just devastating. 🙄""I got this huge lecture of how I was LITERALLY stealing from the store and they COULD call the police but would give me a chance to work off the damage. I couldn’t believe how criminal I was made to feel over it. The best part when they called my boss in who pretended to have never done it before to save her own a**."
"I asked if they were firing me. They said 'Yes and No. You will be let go, but you can choose to work off the damages so we don’t take you to court.' I told them I will just quit and asked for my last check. They said they will deduct what I owe from my last check. And I said 'Well then you need to show me all the footage and prove that I was stealing.' They wouldn’t produce footage, finally called the cops, and when the cops arrived, they were just as confused and called it an internal problem and advised them that this was overblown. I think they felt sorry for me. So finally upper management came in and just said 'just issue the last check, I will sign it here.' So much drama over so stupid a thing."
"It was sad because that actual day my Mom and daughter had come to the mall to meet me for lunch and I had to explain I just was forced to quit that job and was never allowed in that store again like I was some awful jerk."
"It was nice a few short years later, the entire chain bankrupted."
"A coworker waited until we were in front of a large group of people to start 'disciplining' me for something 'wrong' I did (I took my lunch 15 mins late to help another coworker) when she wasn’t even my supervisor. Applied for a job transfer the next day and couldn’t be happier where I am now."
"I had a piece of sh*t of a boss. He'd praise you in private but berate you in public. In front of coworkers and customers. Always about stuff that didn't matter."
"He'd also happily break company policy to side with customers after you spent an hour telling a customer you can't give them stuff for free, for example. Any time he was around, everything was miserable."
"My only regret is that I wasn't there to see him marched out by corporate when he got fired, because I had gone on to a better job by then."
Human Punching Bag
"I used to work in a Kitchen at a pub, it was grim work, but I had freinds there and had worked there for 3 years, So it wasn't too bad."
"One Christmas season we were being absolutely pumped, full out functions and busy services. My boss at the time was very stressed and fair enough, We were busy, We were all working overtime and full out. He used any excuse to completely blow up and absolutely scream at me for little to no reason, essentially him yelling at me was his stress relief. But fine, whatever, kitchens are rough places, no appolagies or anything, move on."
"I then go away for 3 weeks over the Christmas holidays and spend the time road tripping around the country having an amazing time."
"First shift back, not pleased being back, he makes a snarky comment."
"F'k this, Im out."
Even though these employees weren't chewed out in front of co-workers, the low salary without room for negotiation made them not wanting to stick around for much longer.
You Only Get One Job
"They cut my hours so I had to get a second job. 3 days before I was supposed to start said second job, my manager at the main job told me that I couldn't get this second job because I had main job first and I needed to make it my priority. That's when I said f'k you and left. I didn't even give a notice, I literally just sent an email saying I wouldn't be coming in the next day, grabbed my sh*t and went home."
"I used to work Retail and after 7 years at the company, I found out I was only making 50 cents more an hour than someone who just started yesterday. I understood if they couldn't pay me more and asked for a good schedule. 7-3 or 8-4 every day and the same two days off every week. I didn't even ask for weekends off."
"I was told that they couldn't give me a good schedule so I quit."
Situations weren't much different outside the work place. Social dilemmas prompted these Redditors to say, "nope."
"Went to a pub because a friend kept asking. When I got there, he was with a group of people I didn't know, so I introduced myself and got the next round. As I come back with the tray, I hear them saying something along the lines of 'why is that b*tch still here? I thought she was just supposed to drop off a bicycle?' 'Ya, we don't want her to come to <this other town with more pubs> and now she is drinking with us?' 'She's so dumb' *proceeds to imitate and ridicule me as I was actively listening and nodding when I was having a conversation with my friend."
"Gave the beer to random people and walked right out after saying good evening to my friend and briefly explaining I did not appreciate being tricked into being a bicycle taxi for people who hate me directly after meeting me."
A Shocking Incident
"I was on my boat fishing for bass. I casted out my line and watched the lure hit the water but the line just floated in the air. Lightning and thunder crashed and the line fell to the water. F'k this sh*t, I'm out."
"She lined my bed with broken glass put the blankets over it and I dove on in lol."
"Edit: She was violent/crazy and on drugs, was like the 20th attack I took and that made me really think lol."– MyLifeForAuir1
Ally For The Ex
"I found nudes of his ex (from ten years ago) that I’d previously asked him twice to get rid of tucked in a pair of MY socks. Our couples counselor asked why he’d kept them and he said, 'You know. In case I ever needed to blackmail her.' He said it like it was a perfectly normal and reasonable thing to plan to do. The therapist and I locked eyes and I noped the f'k out of there and moved out."
Most of these Redditors realized leaving their situation was better than dealing with the consequences of sticking around.
The latter is never a good option. Why remain in a scenario you know is already going to consume your soul?
The lesson for today is–Don't be miserable. Your sanity is worth saving.Besides, you would never know that something better awaits if you just don't get the F out.
As we enter into the summer months, people now have to decide whether or not they want their morning coffee to be hot or iced.
Lucky for them, it's delicious either way.
One could make an argument that foods that are equally delicious hot or cold are perhaps the best, or at least the most reliable.
And this can include foods which are not customarily sold both hot and cold (cold pizza anyone?).
Redditor NectarineOther4989 was curious to hear which foods people enjoy either hot or cold, leading them to ask:
"What is something that tastes good both hot and cold?"
Fresh out of the oven, or the next day!
Chocolate withstands all temperatrues
"Chocolate."Chocolate Satisfying GIF by HuffPostGiphy
Can't go wrong with fruit and pastry
"Apple pie."- Hak_Saw5000
This doesn't only apply to food
"Revenge."- pushthestartbuttonkarine vanasse revenge GIF by HULUGiphy
Let the flavor develop
"2 totally different flavors depending on warm vs cold from fridge."- nonkowledge
So many to choose from!
A matter of textural preference
"Cheese, ya fools."- eat_dontpray_loveCloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs Eating GIFGiphy
Under a hot greek sun, or during a cold winter's eve.
While there's no better smell than a batch of chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven, those eating them the next day likely aren't missing out either.