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People Explain How They Lost Their Best Friend

Not all friendships are meant to last. Sometimes, there's a good reason for it, like maybe moving away to start a new job or falling out of touch because your babies are taking up all your free time. Whatever the accepted reason, you value the time you had together, reminisce on the good times, and move on.

However, there are those times when the friendship falls completely off the rails and you're not sure how everything went wrong.

Reddit user, FemaleThings, wanted to understand why a friendship fell apart when they asked:

"How did you lose your best friend?"

A One-Way Relationship

"I realized that they were my best friend, but I wasn’t so much so theirs. Made evident when I started being bullied in high school and she immediately turned on me, as if she had waited for this opportunity to ditch me"

– tizbean

Never First Priority

"Similar here. I was the backup friend. Any time she found someone 'better,' she'd completely abandon me. Would even avoid me sometimes so her new friends wouldn't see me with her."

"Then either they'd get tired of her or she'd get tired of them and guess who's coming back to be friends with me like nothing happened? She is. When she didn't have anyone else, she was an awesome friend. But when she had anyone else, she'd do things like ignoring me at my own birthday party so she could text them."

"After high school she'd sometimes randomly message me acting like we were going to be best friends again, then drop off the face of the Earth like usual when something better came along. Eventually she just never showed back up, and by then I was fine with that. I was done with dealing with that."

"Did give me serious trust issues that took years to work through tho."

– ShiraCheshire

Thinking They Need To Move On

"when we both graduated high school, she blocked me on everything (phone, socials, etc.) without any reason or notice. we weren’t fighting or anything and i wasn’t annoying either. idk it was just weird."

– urlocaldumbgurl312

Too Dead To Be Brought Back To Life

"Her sh-tty boyfriend drove a wedge between us and ultimately ruined her life (she did some shady sh-t too). I ran into her 10 years later and she apologized for everything. I accepted and forgave her, but knew I’d never really have a friendship with her again."

– ATru05

Too Taken By Something Else

"Cocaine. He isn’t dead, he’s just not the same anymore."

– ThrowawayzVI

"Same, kinda. I stopped drinking so much, quit partying and hard drugs altogether. All my best friends from that period of my life didn't. Turns out that's all we had in common and me trying to hang out with them just feels awkward now."

– NativeMasshole

We All Have To Give It Our All

"I stopped trying to maintain relationships with people who wouldn’t try themselves"–

– themarkof

Can We All Just Keep Our Hands Off Each Others' Spouses?

"7 weeks into marriage found out my best friend and husband are “together” and have been for a while. (I had known her for 5 years, he had known her for 13 years)"

– diet_pepsi_lover

"This happened to me. My wife ran off with my “best friend.” It gets easier to deal with but the pain never fully goes away."

– oskiew

Not All Best Friends Have

"Old age. Was a great dog."

– TheDrunkyBrewster

"Same here. 13 years of friendship has flown away from me."

– SweetLopez01

They Prefer Each Other

"One day I introduced my best friend to a friend so I could spend time with both since they were good friends to me."

"A couple months pass and now my best friend became best friends with the friend I introduced. I'm not angry that they are best friends now, I'm angry that they keep ghosting me when I text them."

:So while me trying to spend time with both, it was the exact opposite."

"It was really sad for me to lose my best and them ghosting me really made me sad."

– metosuz

Way Too Far

"Got into a fight for something trivial and she told me she understood why my mom left me"

– Prestigious_Web1124

Better Left In The Past

"We were both insecure about ourselves as teens, but she started putting me down in front of other people, especially if there was a boy she liked - making me the target of her jokes and making comments that were supposed to make her seem cool and sarcastic. I told her several times that it was hurtful, and she would always end up in tears, swear to me she wouldn't do it again but after a while she would always start again. She was the first real friend I made, so it was difficult, but I decided to just cut her out of my life after a few years of repeating that pattern."

– -_Midori_-

No Effort, No Friendship

"(english is not my first language, i apologize for any mistakes)"

"We were next door neighbours and spent the majority of our time together since childhood. She went to college and I barely heard from her but we still spent a lot of time together, especially during the summer (also since we were little we were in the same school, church, etc)."

"She got a girlfriend and didn't tell me, but I never pushed it even though I knew since it's not my place to tell. I noticed because there were pictures of them hugging, and she is not an affectionate person so that's how i knew. She told me a year after they started dating. I didn't tell her I knew because that is mean and she would feel that she was outed and that would be plain awful."

"When they started dating she basically cut contact with me. If I wanted to make plans she wouldn't be available because she would be going to meet her and 2 other friends she had made recently (one being a former friend of a friend of mine, who also cut contact with her when this friend group was created), plans would be cut short and she basically doesn't talk to me unless she has to. when she knows I'm in town from college it's like I'm not there, even though."

"I go over to her house to say hello to her parents and she is there (and I say hello out of politeness, because after all we have known each other since we were babies, but I know that if I didn't say anything there wouldn't be any effort on her part). So basically, she started dating and I was left behind. I think I'm being petty and a little too attached, but I'm not the only person who has complaints about this. One doesn't do anything if the other one isn't present, so sometimes people don't make plans with them (this includes going to the beach, grocery store, playing video games...)."

"I tried to revive the friendship many times - I actually like her, like I've said we have been friends forever. For some reason. all those advances were useless, The effort to make contact again was useless. Her pet (whom i loved very much and also named) died and she didn't tell me, she didn't come to my graduation because I didn't invite her girlfriend (i never had a deep relationship with her even though I knew her, so it didn't make sense to me)."

"All of the good things that happen in her life are not shared with me anymore. I obviously was the only one who cared at all to maintain a friendship of a lifetime, so i stopped texting to see what would happen or if she even cared - much to my surprise nothing happened. I saw her last weekend at a mutual friend's graduation, before that the last time I spoke to her was in the ending of January or beginning of February."

"It took me a while to understand that if someone enjoys your company they will make an effort."

– moodeq

Friends From Afar

"She set me and my new boyfriend up to get jumped by my ex and thought it was hilarious. We were trying to mend a tough friendship that suffered a falling out due to the rumors she spread about me. We were inseparable until high school hit. I got a lot of attention from people that she didn't. She didn't like that. She spread rumors. In an attempt to repair our once inseparable bond, I suggested a double date. One thing turned into another, and she set me up."

"We tried to reconcile as adults. She was strung out on drugs and could never visit me alone; had to have druggie boyfriends around all the time. It was uncomfortable."

"She does great now. Clean, in a long term relationship, and has a child. It's easier to clap and love her from a distance. Up close was just toooooo much for me."

– Electrical_Potato934

Not Really A Friend

"realized she was bullying me my whole life. sure we had good times, but there was more bad then good. she would call me names, hit me, tell me i was ugly or fat. she isnt in my life anymore, although it seems that because now that ive found better friends and a new best friend, she wants to come back. i miss her, but i dont want her to be apart of my life."

– shieldxex

It Was All A Lie

"she found a new friend and left me, even though she said a day ago that I was her closest person. later it turned out that she was forced to be friends with me by her mother. =)"

– justmaryy2

Sometimes, It's Neither Of Your Choices

"Undiagnosed heart condition suddenly killed him. It was and still is awful. He was only 27. I have moments that I want to share with him, just call him, set up a trip together, text a funny anecdote etc, but can't and it hits me all over again that he's gone forever."

– WanderingPuppy

Treat others how you want to be treated. It's really not that hard.

Also, value the time you have with your friends. The future is wide and open and occasionally that openness means you won't always be together.

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley

Remember

"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt

Imagination

"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."

RedditbOiiiiiiiiii

"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."

monobarreller

Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."

– GTFOakaFOD

"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip

Yikes!

"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User

"Oh."

– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"

Sensations

Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."

PeachesnPain

Recovery

"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."

good_golly99

Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."

rayrayrayray

Free

The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."

TooReDTooHigh

This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.

Shocked

Giphy

"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."

Admirable_Buyer6528

The SOB

"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”

1-cupcake-at-a-time

Colors

"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"

Hannah_LL7

"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"

huntokarrr

The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."

Fluffy-Hotel-5184

Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."

Hot-Refrigerator6583

Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.

Shopping

"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.