Life is lived by spending money. That is the way we have created our lives, and now that is the way we must live them.
You have to spend money on everything.
For housing, for food, for transportation.
It is literally impossible to live without it.
Sometimes it can feel like we're drowning in bills only to have an unforeseen expense crop up and do far more damage.
Redditor PhantomBaka asked:
"Whats criminally overpriced to you?"
Here were some of those answers.
Twenty Eight Dollar Salad
"F**king salads. Man it's so frustrating, sometimes I just want something light and it costs me more than 6 hamburgers."-toddmflong
"I just ate at a restaurant this evening that offered a Caesar salad for $15. The chicken was $6 extra."-A_Very_Living_Me
Seems Important
"Epi-Pens. This, a thousand times this. I have 4 kids, each needed pens for school, and they couldn't share of course, and pens only came in sets of two."
"So a single $35 pen turned into $3200 because pens were $400 each, and each had to be bought in pairs, and I had to have a specific prescription for each kid. F**king stupid."
"Got the doctor to prescribe a vial of epi and a filter needle (glass vials need filter needles) and the single script cost about $16. Gave to the school nurse. Done. Oh, and the vial didn't 'expire' in 1 year."-ericzhill
Noms Will Break You
"Concessions at sporting events in the US. Our taxes pay for the stadiums. Then the public has to buy tickets to get in. Then when we finally get inside, they are gonna charge $14 for a $3 beer."-ArminTanz
"I remember a coworker told me a story of a baseball game he went to. After buying tickets and beer/food, they sat down and it started to rain."
"It was raining too bad to keep going so they called the game. He said that was $50 down the drain."-superzenki
Are you seeing things here that you immediately roll your eyes at?
Can't Get Out Easy
"Death. Even with no funeral/service/etc - there will be a cost for cremation, burial, etc that your next of kin will need to deal with/pay for. Your will needs to state what you want done, and plans made to fund it."
"My dad passed away earlier this year, and even with no funeral, service, etc (per his request) I still had to pay over $3000 just days after he passed to have his body dealt with, and another $600 for someone to dig a hole at the pre-purchased cemetery plot."
"(His requests were similar to my mom’s when she passed away about 7 years ago, so I wasn’t surprised by the cost - but it’s definitely difficult to put so much money into basic post-death/funeral care.)"-whiteink-13
D'uhhmerican Insurance
"For a family of four it can cost you $1,400 a month to HAVE THE PRIVILEGE of paying the first $12,000 of all your medical bills YOURSELF before insurance kicks in and covers 70-80%. Like, WTF…"
"Doing the math: you pay $28,800 per year BEFORE insurance kicks in…"-CURCANCHA
The Biggest Scam
"Texas Instruments Calculators. Honestly. You have all the necessary software available for you as free or at worst cheap apps on any smartphone."
"I understand you cannot obviously use your phone on exams, but at intro levels, you want to know the graphs of the simpler functions, at least in the appropriate bounds."
"In more advanced levels, the kind of assessment that requires you to use a graphing calculator could easily be done differently, resorting to a computer or a phone."
"The technology might be amazing, but I haven't used my graphing calculator since high school, and I do lots of maths on the daily."-FroggyWatcher
I Just Wanna Play WoW
"Graphics cards is the reason why I bought my first prebuilt. I have always built my own computers, because traditionally it was cheaper for better parts, and it was usually easier to swap out parts if something failed."
"This past year I tried to upgrade my computer as it was finally starting to struggle with new games. After a few weeks experiencing the graphic card sh*tshow, I finally just went ahead and bought a whole pre-built via Costco that had a 3080."
"It was more money than I wanted to pay and the computer is way beefier than what I needed, but after seeing scalper prices and realizing I’ll probably be spending who knows how many months playing the graphic card lottery, I actually feel like I came out ahead."-kamikaze_puppy
The worst part of spending all this money is there's no way to STOP spending it.
Kontakte
"College textbooks - They can cost hundreds of dollars, and professors will publish new ones all the time to force students to get the newest version instead of reusing an older one."-terminat323
"I’m just finished an online program and bought all of the books since I was responsible for teaching myself the material. I went onto my college’s bookstore site and tried to have them buy the books back that I didn’t want."
"They offered 15$ for a textbook over 150$. 15 f**king dollars."-emmma9321
Trauma Often Equals No Money For Therapy
"I tried to get a trauma therapist recently and the one I was recommended charges $200 an hour and doesn’t accept insurance. That in itself is traumatic."
"While we’re here, two things I can recommend from someone who has been in the system for 16+ years and just recently received a correct diagnosis of narcolepsy."
"-Advocate for and get a medical work up if you can before attending therapy. Even if your PCP or psychiatrist just tries to send you to therapy without any testing, keep fighting for it, especially if you have chronic symptoms like depression."
"Many symptoms related to underlying medical conditions can mimic psychiatric conditions. It’s really dangerous to sit in therapy for years without adequate medical testing to make sure you don’t need medical treatment first."
"Also, don’t take meds from a psychiatrist who doesn’t order labs first or gives you a hard time about ordering labs or a sleep study."
"The best psychiatrists should ask for these right away and help you advocate getting them. Out of the long list of doctors I have worked with, only one ordered a sleep study and labs. And she saved my life.
"-For those who have had terrible experiences within therapy, check out the Very Bad Therapy podcast. It’s a podcast that gives a platform to those who have been harmed by therapists and different therapeutic models. It helped me to not feel so alone."-ThisNerdyGirl
The "No Calorie" Diet
"It costs money to be poor. God I hated being poor so much. My old boss asked me if I was working out since I had lost like 15 pounds but the reality of it was I couldn’t afford food."
"We had snacks in the office that accounted for probably 75% of my daily caloric intake. I was going further and further into debt just to keep the bills paid, and for many months could only make the minimum payment on my credit card so the interest was also killing me."
"So glad I’m in a better, debt free position now and have the ability to help out those less fortunate than myself."-FILTER_OUT_T_D
These things are things we have to live with in order to survive, but the truth is, there might be a better way.
As we all navigate these things, and how to stay on top of an ever-more-expensive world, the best thing we can do is rely on each other for tips and tricks on how to make this mess of a life just that much more easy.
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The Weirdest Reasons Guys Suddenly Lost Interest In A Crush
Reddit user Romeothanh asked: 'Men who suddenly lost your interest in someone but for a weird reason, what was it?'
Infatuation is a curious thing.
One moment, you can be swept up in major adoration for someone to such a degree that you can't stop thinking about them.
But the next moment, you may suddenly find yourself moving on.
What is it that drives someone to lose their lust for their former object of affection?
Curious to hear from strangers who experienced going from hot to cold in casual dating, Redditor Romeothanh asked:
"Men who suddenly lost your interest in someone but for a weird reason, what was it??"
Questionable behaviors were seen as major turn-offs.
Poor Parenting
"The way she treated her children, her boy was permitted everything and her daughter had to follow very strict rules."
"I didn't have to ask to know what was going on, the boy's real father wasn't her ex-husband but a guy she had an affair with at work, her daughter was really from her ex-husband. She was always resentful of her upbringing and then her marriage for impeding some kind of dreamed life she thought she was entitled to. So the boy was seen as a piece of that dream and the girl was a piece of her boring life but she was also reliving her childhood through her and pushing her to excel in sports, school and manners and reveling in her daughter's accomplishments as if they were hers."
– Telesto1087
Past Grievances
"She accused me of cheating on her in a past life."
"I told her 'I don’t remember that.'”
– Breloren
"Sounds like something someone who cheated in a past life would say!"
– thefirecrest
At Least She Washes Her Hands...
"She spat in her hands and rubbed them together because she 'needed to wash them.' I cannot describe the colossal speed at which that switch turned off."
– whitesebastian
"Was she some sort of 1930’s farm hand or construction worker?"
– valueduser
There were some serious red flags.
Schadenfreude
"A elderly gentlemen fell in front of us, he took a nasty fall."
"She found it hilarious, instead of helping she just stood there laughing. I helped that person out and I felt so embarrassed for her behavior."
"Also that was the last time I saw her. It was a major turn off for me."
– oxide-NL
Good Guy Vs. Bad Guy
"I invited the girl from my psych course I'd been vibing with to a party. Her car rolled up and I came out to greet her, but it was a dude's car, and she was drunkenly making out with him as I walked up. I didn't flip out or anything, but she slurred her way through some weird attempt at reassuring me that I shouldn't worry, 'cause she was only sleeping with him to punish him because he was a bad guy (apparently that's a thing she does), and that I was a good guy. I didn't ask what happened to good guys. I felt bad for her date, whom she completely ignored the rest of the night. As for the girl, she ended up totally engrossed with the party host's gerbil, tapping on the glass of its cage whispering how she wanted to kill it. I found somewhere new to sit in psych class for the rest of the semester."
– MissionofQorma
I'm Generous And You're Gonna Like It
"She kept buying me stuff. It was nice at first but she kept doing it weekly and demanded I give gifts in return. I asked her to stop and she said "nope this is what I do." Felt like she didn't even care about what I wanted."
– Dry-Enthusiasm3515
Easiest Breakup Ever
"It was a really horrible relationship even this aside but my 'wow i think i actually hate this person' moment was when we were at Badlands National Park. We were just walking out of the gift shop with some other woman when she just let go of the door and it like slammed into that womans face. I said to her 'omg im so sorry' then when we got to the car i said to my gf in like a joking tone 'i cant beliehe you didnt hold the door for her haha' and because she was a very very miserable person all the time this makes her mad and she goes 'well YOURE the man youre supposed to hold the door. I dont NEED to hold the door for anybody' and yeah that one statement alone was very... eye opening for me."
"Seriously the easiest least heartbreaking break up ive ever gone through."
– ILoveTikkaMasala
The Cat Recognized Evil
"My cat didn't like her."
"Brought her home to introduce her to my parents, she meets my childhood cat and. It. Goes. Psychotic. Just for her reaching down to pat him, he panicked, attached himself to her arm, and wouldn't let go, just clawing at her like he found a demon to fight or something. When he eventually detached himself (they were both running around the room screaming as she tried to wave him off her arm) I checked her over and he did some damage. He's never reacted like that to anyone before or since. We broke it off shortly later."
"I found out a few years ago she was in the court system. Why? She tried to kill her own kid. I didn't dodge a bullet because of my cat, I dodged an artillery shell."
– GryphonicOwl
It's not me, it's you.
So Rude
"She didn’t hold the door open to people just meeting her at the door, would let it slam on people behind her, didn’t do the little thank you wave to other cars that let her out, didn’t say please and thank you to serving staff. She wasn’t overtly rude, she just had a bit of a me,me,me vibe."
– Hellenicparadise
Norwegian Love
"She told me she was pregnant and it was mine, 2 days after sleeping with me for the first (and only) time. Then proceeded to tell me she had a boyfriend."
"I should have twigged earlier really. She flew from Norway to sleep with me and flew back the next day."
– Perseus73
Face Reveal
"I’d been talking to this girl in class I thought was really cool. We ended up going for a bite after class one day and she suggested we go hang out in my dorm room. Hell yeah."
"Then she took off her glasses and she looked exactly like my mom. It was so jarring I excused myself to the bathroom to regroup, but when I came back I couldn’t unsee my mom’s face on her."
"I made some lame excuse and went back alone. I felt bad about bailing on her but I also how the hell would I tell her the real reason? Either she thinks I’m a weirdo or thinks I’m saying she looks like she’s in her fifties."
– OneSmoothCactus
Don't Speak
"My mate ghosted a girl simply because he didn't like her cadence when she spoke."
– Random-chick-98
My shallowest moment was years ago when I ghosted a hot tennis player I was dating because he had a particularly annoying gait.
Anytime we would walk around the city (in New York), he would gradually lean into me and prevent us from walking a straight path.
I thought he was deliberately trying to get close but it turned out that one of his legs was shorter than the other resulting in him taking uneven steps.
When he explained his situation, it weirded me out.
I didn't have the heart to tell him why I could no longer see him, so I just stopped responding to his incessant messages about when we were meeting next.
I remain regretful to this day about my immature behavior, and I wish him the best wherever he is.
People Break Down The Worst Double Standards They've Ever Heard
A double standard is defined as:
"a code or policy that favors one group or person over another"
However not all double standards are formalized. Most of the double standards individuals face daily are based on customs, stereotypes, traditions or other less formal societal codes of conduct.
Double standards are inherently unfair to one or sometimes both parties.
They may exert control or compliance with gender or socioeconomic stereotypes on everyone or serve to repress one group while favoring the other. But they shouldn't be confused with all unequal rules.
The sign at the amusement park that says "you must be this tall to ride" is there for a very good reason.
Double standards fail to pass any logic test, with some being more ridiculous than others.
Reddit user No-Challenge-3305 asked:
"What's the stupidest double standard you ever heard from someone?"
My Time Vs. Your Time
"I had a production manager who would come in late and leave early most days and then make problems for anyone who needed a half day for anything."
~ TheGreatGrappaApe
Giphy"My first manager at my current job was a harda** about hours. Would basically say 'There's the door' if you asked to leave early or come in late, no matter how rare or needed the occurrence was."
"Always talked about how dedicated he was."
"Dude would roll in at 9:30 leave at 11:00 for lunch. Get back at 1:00 and go home at 3:00."
"He constantly talked about how he just LIVES at work... even though we were all there, and he had been seen at the golf course every day."
"One of the funniest moments was when our client was parked behind him, and needed my manager to move his truck to be able to leave, but said 'I'm not gonna ask him to move his truck, because I'm afraid he'll just leave'."
~ bcos4life
"Stealing" What He Gave Them?
"My uncle used to hire undocumented immigrants while complaining that illegal aliens were stealing people's jobs."
"He liked to hire them because they worked hard and were cheap."
~ ScrubIrrelevance
"So he himself was stealing other people’s jobs because it’s not like the illegal immigrants were able to make the decision to employ them instead of a US citizen or person with a visa."
~ CaptainObviousBear
Just For Me, Not For Thee
"'I want an open relationship to explore my sexuality, but I don't want you sleeping with anyone else'."
~ MamaPagan
"I didn't realize people actually said stuff like this until my most recent ex said it to me."
"I was baffled, to say the least."
~ Vetzero
GiphyThey Are "Those People"
"My mom had a problem with welfare recipients until my sibling went on it."
"Then, back to nasty welfare recipients when they got off welfare."
~ Eringobraugh2021
"My cousin is on multiple government programs, and counts the seconds until her 3 separate child support payments come in... then sh*ts on 'Deadbeats' all the time."
"She even bragged about using her EBT to get tattoos."
~ bcos4life
Boys Will Be Boys
"My ex believed that teen girls who fall pregnant while still in school should be expelled and not allowed to finish school at all."
"Sounded like he thought they were contagious or something."
"After a heavy argument I said 'OK fine then boys must also be expelled', but no apparently it's not the same thing."
~ boekieblaker21
Piety Not In Practice
"My aunt calls me a sl*t for wearing short skirts."
"She doesn't know who the father of two of her three children is."
~ Perfect_Patience1109
Giphy"When I was young, a relative used to constantly call me a 'whore' and accuse me of being pregnant, when I had never even had a boyfriend."
"Meanwhile, she was sleeping with someone else's husband."
~ haloarh
"Isn't that usually the way?"
"The one calling people names and pointing fingers is probably the most guilty."
"Hypocrites."
~ NoThanksJustLooking1
It's Only An Entitlement If Someone Else Gets It
"My FIL served in Vietnam. When he came home, he used the G.I. Bill to get a free college degree (in social work)."
"He didn't like being a social worker, so he spent much of his adult life working as an appliance salesman, an electrical supply salesman, or (for significant chunks of time) was unemployed."
"He owned a house and raised two kids."
"When he retired, his sole source of income was Social Security."
"He never paid a dime for medical care because of his VA benefits."
"He sold his house (that he paid like $65k for in the 70's) for a healthy profit, moved to Nevada, and settled into a retirement community."
"If you ask him, he'd happily tell you that 'the problem with this country is all the people and their damned entitlements. I don't know why people don't just get a job'."
~ Redditor
Cheat Codes
"My friend’s mom said Men cheating and women cheating are different because men only care about the physical and not the emotional."
"Come to find out, she was being cheated on by her current husband, and I am assuming this is how she coped."
~ Head-Roll6309
"The responses I got to being cheated on from coworkers were different. I was blamed by other people for not giving her what she needed so obviously she should go out and cheat to get those things."
"And I responded with 'Do you think the same about men cheating?'."
"'Of course not. Men cheat because they can't be trusted and will f'k anything they can. Women cheat because they are being mistreated by men and it's his fault she has to go out and do that'."
"Was a great comment to me, the panic attack filled person whose life was falling apart and entire world was destroyed by her cheating."
"I left that workplace pretty soon after those comments."
~ polorat12
TMI, Dude
"Dude I worked with felt I needed to know that he'd have to have a wife and a mistress because he didn't want someone who sucked his d*ck kissing the kids."
"And I was like 'have you considered maybe washing your d*ck better?'."
~ VinnyVincinny
"Really they can’t reconcile respecting someone they have sex with."
~ Zer_0
Consent Is For Everyone
"'He can't refuse sex. He's the man. The woman always decides when and where we have sex. Everybody knows that'."
"In marriage counseling, my ex-wife (while we were still married). She was serious, too."
~ Azzizzi
"My ex-wife would get visibly angry when I wasn't in the mood but she was."
"More than once I'd ask her like 'you know how messed up it would be if these roles were reversed, right? If I got mad at you for not being in the mood?'."
"And her response was just 'well, you're a guy'."
~ AutoDefenestrator273
"Ugh, it sucks that you went through that, and I'm sorry. The idea that men want sex all the time no matter what is so damaging."
"Everyone is allowed to not want sex, and I wish people would stop acting entitled to other people's bodies."
"Even when people aren't reacting with anger if a male partner turns down sex, this myth still causes real damage in relationships. I know both men and women who've expressed fears that they're broken or their relationship is somehow dying if the woman has a higher libido or even if the male partner turns down sex once."
"It's awful and I really wish people would stop buying into this idea."
~ VinnyVinnieVee
And Now For Something A Little Lighter...
After these serious topics, let's end on a lighter note.
Unless you're a cat.
Feline Fatitude
"I call my cat chubby all the time but as soon as someone else does it, I get so offended."
~ Green_Bench7560
"I also call my cat fat. He is not. I asked the vet."
"But I'd be super offended if he developed the ability to talk in English and then called me fat."
~ Dmahf0806
Giphy"Growing up, we had a cat who was a grand lady but she was kind of a chonk. Pleasingly chonky."
"We took her to the vet for a regular checkup and got a different than usual vet, who came in and said, 'Whoa, well let's look at this little porker!'."
"My parents and I all got mad instantly. We were allowed to joke about her weight. No one else was."
"That's the rule. Also 'porker' sounds so rude."
~ SageThistle
GiphyDouble standards are all around us.
Which ones do you find particularly foolish?
When I started college, I had every intention of cooking all my meals. It became very apparent very quickly that I simply didn't have the time to accomplish this, and I became the Takeout Queen.
I ordered food constantly. Between getting a monthly "allowance" from my dad (intended to go towards groceries), finding coupons taped to my apartment door everyday, and essentially being "allowed" to tip less than handsomely since I was a college student, I was able to afford this.
When I graduated and moved into my own place, things changed. I was too old to not tip properly, I didn't get any supplementary money from my family, and I had more expenses, such as rent. Still, I continued to order food, and it became my main expense.
My friends tell me the way I order food is only meant for "rich people." I have to skimp on everything else in order to have enough saved to support this. It's definitely true, but I don't think this habit will ever change.
I'm not the only one that does "rich people stuff." Redditors do lots of things that is classified that way, despite not being rich, and they are ready to share their stories.
It all started when Redditor Abbas_Noorani 16 asked:
"What is some rich sh*t you do even though you are not rich?"
Ravenous
"Food. I buy what I want and I try new stuff. I like cooking."
– 34i79s
"Grocery shopping without concern for budget is what made me realize I had made it back in the day. Good times."
"Now I have hard budgets again and it truly sucks. You question every damn decision and convince yourself to do without or downgrade to the lowest priced quality."
– txmail
"On the same boat. The other day I looked at expensive butter that I used to stock up on without even thinking twice and sighed."
– cat101786
Monthly
"Forget to cancel my free trial."
– Adept_Insurance5550
"Damn. Thanks for the reminder."
– -Bk7
"I'm still a member of AOL."
– __SpeedRacer__
Too Hot
"I leave the fridge door open when getting the butter out even though my dad said it would cost billions and send us to the streets."
– frank-sarno
"I leave the front door open when I pop out to grab my mail. Took me years of living on my own to realize the AC bill doesn’t shoot up by hundreds of dollars if I do that."
– MelodramaticQuarter
Necessities
"Buy the good toilet paper."
– FrankGehryNuman
"Absolutely!"
"Good toilet paper. Can't stand cheapo toilet paper, you give yourself a surprise when your finger goes through the paper when wiping your chuff. Don't get me started on that stuff they used to have in hospitals! It was awful - sandpaper that didn't soak up but rather moved stuff 🤐"
– helensmelon
Clean And Sweep
"I have a maid that comes weekly. I've found that my sanity is worth the cost."
– Eringobraugh2021
"Weekly? Oo la la!"
– a**ypantz72
Comfort Matters
"My thermostat stays at the temperature setting of what is most comfortable to me and nothing will change that."
– Cyb3rTruk
"Lol this really outlined how different climates can be. My thought was "Yeah, I'm going to be as cozy and warm as I want and not freeze in the comfort of my own home.""
– McCoyIsFun
Double
"Some days I have two sandwiches at lunch. I smile as I watch all my fellow proletariat eating their single sandwich."
– ShambolicPaul
"Brotip: Cut your sandwich an infinite number of times and rearrange the pieces into two full sandwiches. Don't give your money away to Big Sandwich!"
– NotInherentAfterAll
Sparkling
"Paying for car cleaning."
– angydevil
"Justified, tho my dad would kill me."
– Abbas_Noorani
The Big Cheese
"I sometimes buy name brand cheese instead of the store brand."
– NeuroguyNC
"Tillamook or nothing for me! I’ll buy store brand beans and paper towels and other stuff. But not for my cheese!"
– VariegatedThumb
Replenish
"We have a garage fridge that is full of all different kinds of beverages."
– SixStinkyFingers
"It's not the fridge itself, it's keeping it stocked!"
– 4x32Studio
A House Is A Home
"I own a house...."
– 1d0m1n4t3
"Oh damn rich people sh*t."
– Abbas_Noorani
"We shouldn't be able to joke about owning a modest home being rich people sh*t. Anyone who works full time should be able to afford a home."
– 1d0m1n4t3
Write Better
"I buy the gel comfort pens. Makes me feel I'm a higher class when writing at work. Smooth crisp consistent ink."
– UltraCoolPimpDaddy
"I have gotten into arguments over people stealing my G2 .07."
– savvyspoon2
Me Too!
"I buy small trash bags for the bathroom trash bins. My whole family uses grocery bags, but I don’t like how they always rip at the bottom."
– Deleted User
It's Required!
"No Margarine in my house, Butter Only, and lots of it. My arteries think I'm rich."
– weisblattsnut
Unused
"I have HBO but I don’t watch it."
– MillionToOneShotDoc
"I have Netflix, Prime, Hulu, and Disney Plus. Don’t watch any of it. Watch YouTube all the time and I’m too stupid to get Premium."
– AngryDerf
Now, that's the definition of having money to burn!
Of course, I wouldn't know. I need to save money for my food!
Married People Divulge What They Realized Only After Tying The Knot
Generally, when people talk about marriage, they get excited about the big wedding day and the honeymoon thereafter.
People don't always talk about what happens in the marriage after the "honeymoon phase" wears off, and they certainly don't talk about the other long-term realities of marrying someone for life.
Pondering this, Redditor Ok_Reality-77 asked:
"What did you realize after getting married?"
It's Not All Romantic
"Marriage isn’t just about the person you want to have fun with. It’s also about the person you want to spend $10,000 on a new furnace with, or go to a funeral with, or get a flat tire with."
"Your spouse should make your way in life easier, especially during the hard times."
- aggressivelysingle
Wedding Invitation Drama
"I don’t get upset if I don’t make the cut for someone else’s wedding, that s**t is expensive."
- coconutmama77
"I had one wedding where I got pretty ticked off about not being invited, to be honest."
"One of the bridesmaids at my wedding got married a few years after we did. She was out in Baltimore, and we are UK-based, but she wanted my wife as her bridesmaid too, so we of course flew over. We were the only ones not local."
"In the rehearsal the day before, one of the groomsmen wasn't there, so I stood in for him."
"Then later that night, I was told that the wedding was a small affair and that only my wife was invited to the ceremony. I would be only an evening guest. They just neglected to mention that on the invite."
"It caused massive ripples among the guests because there was no reason for snubbing me like that."
"I really liked the groom and he was in bits trying to deal with the psycho fit his bride was throwing about everything, so I ended up just doing as told so as not to cause an issue for him on his day."
"Years later, she asked my wife on a video call if we wanted to come visit them sometime soon, and her husband said to her, 'You're kidding, right? You know he doesn't like you after the wedding s**t, right?'"
"She was shocked to learn that I thought she was an a**hole, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Wind_Yer_Neck_In
The Wrong Partner
"Bad marriage does way more harm than being alone."
- rosiebunnies
"When I left my first husband for being an irredeemable a**hat, I truly thought I’d sworn off marriage forever. But here I am, 14 years into my second marriage, and I couldn’t be more thankful that I was wrong about marriage being a bad thing."
- -comfypants
"I’ve had my own bad relationships. Then I started to look at my parents' unhealthy relationship but then saw that my brother actually has a really good one, and that helped put things into perspective. Some people should be together, and others should not."
- Lancefree
The Value of Disagreements
"That true partnership means conflict is inevitable but productive."
"Part of me knew we'd disagree, but I took some time to know the best way to work through it. It's not being a doormat and it's not being right every time."
- d20sapphire
The Importance of Alone Time
"How much I NEED alone time..."
- blacksweater
"We live in a house larger than we need. So we each have hobby areas and our own bathroom in addition to general s**t we don't do together. Our friends think it's weird, but we are strong as f**k, and their relationships didn't survive the pandemic."
- GoldenBarracudas
Secret Personalities
"People can be really, REALLY good at hiding who they truly are."
"People keep telling me I must have missed signs. I think they just haven’t encountered people that can change on a dime like my ex-husband."
- InstantElla
Increased Income
"How much easier it is to afford things as a joint couple with two incomes."
- Ornery-Cattle1051
"To me, this is one of the few downsides to being single. I like my single life but do not like my single income."
- SnoopsMan
Constant Forgiveness
"Marriage is a constant exercise in forgiveness."
"Be sure you love them, like for real."
"Luckily for me, I do."
- pussinbootskitty
Marrying the Family
"They say you marry their family. You absolutely do."
"One day I was a girlfriend, and the next I was holding my husband's grandmother's hand while she died. I was dragged into family fights the likes of which I'd never seen. I've been loved and weaponized and defended like I could never fathom."
"I laughed at people saying they married the whole family. I was so wrong."
- IHeartChipSammiches
"You put this into words so beautifully. I never would have imagined how much I love his family as my own, even though they bug the crap out of me sometimes, lol (laughing out loud)."
- chipmunk_butt
Communication is Key
"That good communication is vital to a relationship."
"The ability to have a calm, rational conversation over any topic is something to strive for. The trust that the two of you can talk about anything in a safe environment is key. The ability to be honest and open with each other."
"Communication, y'all. It works."
- agharta-astra
Ditch the Highway
"You spent X amount of years doing things your way. So has your new spouse. Just because it's not your way doesn't mean it's wrong."
"It's okay to compromise, but it's also okay to realize that some things may come down to My Way, Their Way, and Our Way."
"My husband and I learned a lot from each other but 15 years later, we have never, NEVER compromised on how to fold laundry so we just each do our own. I don't mind doing his, but I'll fold it my way. He'll easily wash and dry mine, but he folds his way. It's nice that the laundry is done, but then I had to refold everything."
"For those wondering, I fold shirts in a tri-fold rectangle and he does some weird square thing. Incompatible in our dresser drawers."
- Scucer
Hands and Height
"I have to add (this may sound bizarre) that if one of you is left-handed and the other is right-handed, you will most certainly run into some problems."
"It seems ridiculous, but where you place things that you need multiple times on a daily basis comes down to space and which hand you use (e.g., dish soap, hand soap, etc. Basically anything on a counter in a kitchen or a bathroom)."
"This also applies to height differences. Sometimes we really, literally have to find the in-between, or accept that one or the other will be doing it for themselves and it’s not insulting. It’s just really for the best sanity of us both."
- HGLiveEdge
Cherish the Time
"I must say, for me, it would be Time. Time moves SOOOOO very slow, and SOOOOOOOOOOOOO very fast."
"I married my wife yesterday."
"We closed on our first house yesterday."
"We had our boys YESTERDAY."
"I finished our basement with my own two hands (and my best friends’ hands) yesterday."
"We sold our first home yesterday."
"My father passed away YESTERDAY."
"My boys started high school and middle school yesterday."
"I just made an @ss of myself tonight and needed to apologize to my wife! (This actually was tonight.)"
"Seriously, everything feels like yesterday, but it is moving by so quickly. I’m just trying to hold on, thankfully, she’s here with me."
- pencerules
Marriage Plus Kids
"Everyone was wrong, marriage changed nothing."
"But children... Children change everything."
- korinth86
"100% agree. We lived together before we got married. Absolutely nothing in our relationship changed. But kids. Oh lord, that changes everything."
- StannVeal
Medically Responsible
"It changes who can kick whom out of the hospital room. And that was why I got married."
"My husband got married for the feel’s and the frilly stuff. I got married so he/we inherit each other's stuff and get the final say on end-of-life stuff (it was a rough couple of years, I lost a lot of family in a short span)."
"Can all that be done separately from marriage? YEP. Is it viewed as seriously? Nope. Can it be done as easily and in one fell swoop? Nope."
"(This, more than the feelings, to me, is why people should be able to marry whom they choose, regardless of gender.)"
- sageautumn
Right in the Feels
"I like saying, 'My wife…' even more than I thought I would."
"We’ve each been married before, and we were together for 7 years before we got around to getting married (we knew where it was going very early). I didn’t think it would feel like that big of a deal to say, but… I love my wife, and the experience of referring to her is enough to make me smile."
- BetweenCoffeeNSleep
While there were some tough realities mixed into this list, most of the experiences shared here were heartwarming.
Marriage might be diminished by some to be just a piece of paper, but for those who take the symbolism seriously, there is some real happiness in store for them.