I've never been a religious person. I have aunts and uncles who are quite pious (or so they tell everyone). Suffice it to say that religion has disappointed me more than once, though I see no point in denigrating someone else's religious beliefs provided they're not hurting anyone.
After Redditor PM_ME_YOUR_WIRING asked the online community, "What ruined religion for you?" people came forward to share their stories. They're rather eye-opening and provide excellent insight into why people don't take to religion at all––or abandon it altogether.
"That people would try..."
That people would try to force their religion onto me and make me feel like I was a bad person if I didn't have the same beliefs as them.
"I was told..."
I was told that dinosaur bones were planted in the ground by Satan to trick us into believing in evolution.
"Learning that my mom..."
Learning that my mom got alienated and bullied after she tried creating a single moms club at our church.
"My parents told me..."
My parents told me at a young age that I would go to hell for asking the question "how do we know god is real." They could have simply said to read the Bible or something like that. But instead they told me that I would go to hell, I guess it was the idea behind "blind faith."
My infant brother's death. I was very little when he died at 3 days old, but it always bothered me being taught that Jesus was the only man that ever lived without sin. I thought "what could this helpless little baby have done that was a sin? He never even cried?" When I asked my very catholic grandmother about it she told me to watch what I say because I was being blasphemous.
"Being kicked out of Christian school..."
Being kicked out of Christian school prior to the third grade because my Mom bought the wrong edition of the Bible.
Scientology ruined my religion for me.
I'm an actor, and they hired me to do some instructional/education video for them and paid decent. I know they're kinda kooky, but I thought "Hey, I've worked for crazier people in this industry" so I met with them on their super secret 'Gold Base' in Southern California.
I shot there for several days, and got to know the staff/volunteers who have dedicated their entire life to serving Scientology. I learned a lot about their religion, as I've been genuinely curious about all faiths.
I remember driving home after my final day on set, and thinking to myself "How can such normal, nice people believe in something so obviously false? I mean, their founder, who has been historically documented as a scoundrel and a crook, literally wrote a book, got a huge influence of people, and then convinced them that it was the one true way to live!"
Being a fully practicing Mormon at the time, you can imagine my shock when I immediately realized that's the exact same thing people say about my religion.
"They would judge you..."
How hypocritical the people in church were. They would judge you and condemn you for drinking as a teenager yet I would see the pastor and all the deacons out drunk and driving home at friends houses whose parents went to the church.
"When I came to the realization..."
When I came to the realization that trusted authorities did hurt children- really really hurt and damage children- and gaslight the communities that literally supported the church through personal sacrifice and sincere generosity- it was the absolute definition of disgrace and I am in agony that it was ever even tolerated.
"I realized..."
I couldn't figure out the difference between the abuse and manipulation of my family and that of my religion. Looking at it critically, I realized it's just abuse all the way down.
"Currently..."
Just lost interest. Currently i have no reason to believe, and no reason not to believe. God may or may not have created the Universe, it doesn't affect me. Just continue to live life day by day.
"However..."
I am atheist, but don't have a problem with people believing in god. Prayer is good for the most part, and religion gives comfort to billions of people.
However, the moment it is organized and taught as facts and forced on others or used to feel better than others, it becomes dangerous and often evil. The hypocracy to use religiin to justify anything more than trying to share faith calmly and peacefully makes me angry.
I wish that people could truly be spiritual without ever being bastards about it.
"Gettng deeply..."
Getting deeply involved in the church after a rough patch in my life. Started to work in the office, and quickly realized how it was all about money.
"I've developed many other issues..."
On Sundays I'd get to see other kids in Sunday School. I wasn't supposed to ask to go to their houses, but if I asked my parents in front of them or their parents sometimes they'd feel obligated to allow it. If they said no, I knew what was waiting for me when we got in the minivan in the church parking lot. But it was worth the small chance to be somewhere else with someone else for a few hours.
Seeing kindness preached, and seeing how much they appeared to agree and live by Christian ideals from 9-12 every Sunday, and then experiencing such an opposite the second the church couldn't see it.
That ruined religion for me. Not right then, but as I grew and I learned that true kindness comes without theistic intervention. It comes without reason, or expectation. Without reward.
I've developed many other issues with many religions, but I respect all those who follow their religions peacefully. Christians included.
"There is not enough love and goodness in the world to permit giving any of it away to imaginary beings."
"I will say to those of you..."
Man, there are A LOT of individuals in this thread that have been totally scarred and burned by religion in some sort or another. Sorry that there are so many hurting people in here.
I guess that is why it's so important for those who profess a specific faith to live out the faith that they are following. Not just offer lip service to their beliefs but to truly live it out in their daily lives. The moment that you aren't vertically aligned to an outsider (or someone following that same religion) it is going to immediately put that religion in a negative light.
I will say to those of you who have been burned to keep in mind that this entire world, every single person alive at this moment, is going to screw up. We're all imperfect humans trying to make it through life together and nobody is exempt from sinning and messing up. It doesn't matter if you're the Pope, a priest, a minister, a rabbi or any other sort of religious leader. They're all fallen creatures bound to mess up. That's why extending grace is so important but it by NO MEANS excuses those in a position of power and influence from abusing another person. Ever.
"They care more about their image..."
My parents. They're hypocritical, manipulative, abusive, gas lighting people. They care more about their image in church rather than the well being of their children. I don't hate that I grew up in a christian family nor do i regret on being a christian BUT i know hate going to church because people their especially the old ones are all the same. Self righteous hypocrites.
"Being told by the youth pastor..."
Being told by the youth pastor that science is right when it comes to science and evolution, but that I should ignore it and "learn to believe" anyway.
"I was raised Catholic..."
This question is a day old and probably nobody will see my answer, but I read most of the top comments and I'm baffled that nobody mentioned my reason to leave religion: the fact that most of them classifies women as inferior compared to men.
I was raised Catholic and I never understood why we couldn't have priestesses, or women in positions of power within the church. They were always answering to men one way or another. And of course all the religious mumbo jumbo about Eve being the first sinner, that women are essentially filthy because they menstruate, they must always obey their husbands, etc etc etc. Or the fact that God is always presented as a man even though it's genderless , or how convenient was that Jesus was a guy.
All of this started to get to me when I was becoming a teen, and it was my form of teenage rebellion - I didn't get drunk or did drugs or anything like that, I was actually a good girl. But if I caught a whiff of any rule being enforced on me "because you're a girl/woman", I'd rebel against it, however necessary. When I finished school, I never went back to church. I can't believe in anything that will affirm I'm less simply because of something I had no control over, this case my sex.
"So imagine..."
Christianity makes you paranoid, it forces the belief that there is this devil who will send you to hell for eternal suffering if you sin which i consider anti freedom. So imagine if you accidentally sin and are now forced to live with the idea that you will be in eternal pain when you die. This just makes your brain feel oppressed like you are forced to do what the god demands you to do, like that you dont matter and that you will soon die and suffer infinitely.
"Two people are on their death bed..."
I didn't grow up religious, so I never really believed in god. When I learned the word agnostic, I started describing myself that way. I now now that a better term would have been an agnostic atheist. Around the age of 20 I got a chance to spend some time with a religious family for a few days. On one of the long car rides they brought up religion and hit me with the following gem.
Two people are on their death bed with only a few minutes left to live. One was a doctor, traveled around the entire world saving lives, establishing clinics and doing many good deeds. The other is a murderer. They are both given a chance to accept Jesus into in their final moments. The murderer does so, but the doctor doesn't. The doctor goes to hell. The murderer goes to heaven.
Shorty after that trip, I bought "The God Delusion" by Dawkins and have since started to just identify as an atheist.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Things People Will Never Order At A Restaurant
Reddit user DGex asked: 'Reddit. What will you never order at a restaurant?'
Be it an old familiar, or a new establishment that has been the talk of the town, restaurant diners are always faced with a challenge once they are handed a menu.
Do they stick with what they know, and order the burger and fries or spaghetti and meatballs, which are both difficult to screw up?
Or do they get a little adventurous, and try the restaurant's specialité, even if it's something they've never tried before in their lives?
Generally speaking, it tends to be on a case-by-case basis based on the restaurant they are dining in.
Of course, some people have such an aversion to certain ingredients or dishes, that no matter the location, they will never order it.
"Reddit. What will you never order at a restaurant?"
Not What, But When...
"I'll never order 10 minutes before closing."- bearstrugglethunder
Speaking From Experience
"Ice in my drink."
"After decades in the industry, I've only ever seen one change the ice machine filters and clean the bin regularly."-Anna_Namoose
"I have almost twenty years of experience managing bars and restaurants."
"What do you think I won't get? "
"Stylish or not?"
"Ice."
"In everything."
"I can assure you that I have saw far more appalling ice machines in back of houses than immaculate ones."- Tricky_Routine138
ice waiting GIF by tarninabarnGiphyStay Consistent
"Anything outside of what their core business is."
"Not ordering fish at a steakhouse, a burger at a Mexican restaurant etc."- KinkyPTDoc
Why Pay For What You Can Make Yourself?
"Quesadilla."
"I'm not paying for tortillas and cheese."
"I always have that sh*t at home."- DGex
"Pasta."
"I can make it at home, I'm a decent cook and can make most pasta dishes at home."
'I eat out to have foods I can't make."
'I'm usually disappointed when I do order it."- bensmom2020
"Tuna fish sandwich."- Limp-Persimmon-5729
"A grilled cheese sandwich."
"There's just no way a restaurant can elevate it to make it worth the cost."- manderifffic
Hungry Grilled Cheese GIF by U by Kotex BrandGiphyCasear, Cobb, Waldorf...NOPE!
"Salad."
"It’s so cheap to buy the ingredients and most restaurant salad comes from a bag."
"It’s just dumb in 85% of the cases."- humancalculus
"$17+ salad."- Monowakari
Split It, Maybe?
"Oh, I've got a good one."
"Do not order the lasagna if you visit Brio Tucsan Grille."
"It's not awful, fantastic, or extraordinary; it's just normal."
"But why, you say, would you advise against eating a typical meal?"
"Considering that it contained 5200 calories. calories for two days."
"When I removed empty dishes from the table in front of guests, I would shudder."- KeyPersimmon445
If You Can't See The Sea, Maybe Avoid Seafood...
"In a location not known for its seafood, lobster."
"Where are they going to get lobster, anyway?"- WillingnessInner9666
"Rocky Mountain Oysters."- Rollin_Soul_O
Eight Is A Few Too Many Legs...
"Anything cephalopod."- FarewellMyQueen
Pbs Nature Sea GIF by Nature on PBSGiphyUnless They Pick The Leaves Themselves...
"Tea."
'Compared to how much it costs to make at home, it's stupidly overpriced at restaurants."- Pure_Block_5309
There's nothing wrong with being a picky eater.
That being said, it's always worth trying something new before deciding you don't like it.
Even if no one should blame you for refusing to order sushi at a pizza counter.
"Never dip your pen in the company ink."
An age-old cautionary saying urging people not to get romantically entangled with their coworkers.
Doing so used to be illegal at many companies, whereas now it's grown to become a bit more commonplace, and often results in some cases of wedded bliss and happily ever afters (as demonstrated by The Office's Jim and Pam.)
Of course, when entering a relationship with a coworker, be it a one night stand or a committed, multi-year relationship, there is always the risk that it might not end well, resulting in your being forced to see your ex every day at the office (Bridget Jones anyone?)
"People who slept with a coworker, what happened after?"
Well, That's A Success?
"We became friends and she donated a kidney to me lol."- Headbobby
As If Nothing Had Changed...
"Got married 2 years later."
"'Co-worker' can mean different things and different circumstances, for instance:"
"Our company had 130,000 employees world-wide."
"Our group was housed in a building with 1,000 employees."
"We were not in each other's chain of command."
"It could have been somewhat awkward if it did not work out, but not awful."
"It did work out."
"Later on, saved money by carpooling!"- SyntheticOne
The Office Laughing GIF by NBCGiphyJust Couldn't Fight The Chemistry
"We were both working as actors in a small film, cast as romantic leads."
"She noticed I got tense when we had to kiss... and suggested we go on a date to practice kissing."
"We played mini-golf and practiced kissing."
"Then we continued practicing in her car in the parking lot after the mini-golf place closed until a cop came to investigate."
"Then we got a hotel room and practiced other stuff."
'I guess I'm a slow learner because she's still giving me remedial lessons."- Jake_Science
Nothing Personal, One Hopes..
"She had to fire me."
"Poor performance."- bilvester
Consider Long Term Goals First
"Fun."
"Highly recommend if you have a job."
"Do not recommend if you have a career."- bluegiant85
Renee Zellweger Office GIF by Working TitleGiphyOn To Bigger And Better Things
"Dated discreetly and after four years we got engaged."
"We then both told our supervisors we were leaving in the summer."
"At our last meeting as they were doing their good bye lunch for both of us with about 30 coworkers, they had us say a few words."
"I went first and said I was moving to a new city."
"Then it was my fiancés turn and she said she was also moving to that city, with me, because we’re engaged."
"It was glorious."
"We are happily married for 13 years and have an awesome daughter."
"Life is goooood."- lmc227
Jealous Much?
"I had a supervisor that I really hit it off with and had great chemistry."
"As soon as they found out we were dating, she got fired and immediately found a better job."
"We've been married for almost 13 years now."
"I feel I should clarify a little bit while still keeping the details as vague as possible because quite a few people worked there."
"She was my boss in the sense that if she told me something needed taken care of, I was expected to take care of it."
"She didn't actually have the power to fire me if our relationship went south, but she probably could have gotten me fired if she had been that type of person."
"We worked there for two years before anything remotely physical happened."
"Our lunch breaks lined up."
"After a few conversations, we became friendly and started spending most of that hour shooting the sh*t with each other."
"I was crushing on her hard, but didn't think she'd be interested in dating one of the janitors, so I didn't say anything in an effort not to make things weird at work."
"One day I let it slip to one of the other janitors that I had a crush on her."
"He thought it would be hilarious to immediately go and tell her what I said."
"The next day, she asked me if I had really said that."
"I was really embarrassed but admitted that I had said it."
"She basically told me she was feeling the same way and gave me her number."
"11 months later, we were married."
"There were two guys in upper management that had asked her out and been rejected."
"Their egos obviously took a hit when they found out she chose me."
"She was fired after being blamed for someone else's mistake."
"Then they refused to show the proof that she was the one responsible."
"It was bullsh*t, but it only took her two weeks to find a job that paid a lot more."
"Once they did that to her, I immediately became a terrible employee and openly talked sh*t about everyone in management until they really had no choice but to fire me."- Imahorrible_person
Nothing Lost, Nothing Gained
"We did it a couple of times then both went on with our lives."
"It was just something we both wanted to do temporarily."
"Neither one of us wanted it to be serious or long-term, and so it wasn’t."- Listening_Heads
No Regrets Whatsoever
"We moved in together, got engaged, bought a house and had a baby."
"Don't let a job get in the way of your life."- AllSonicGames
Who'd Have Guessed...
"I slept with my boss back in 93."
"She instigated it."
"She’s sitting beside me."
"30 years later and two adult kids."
"Worked out!"
"I should add we did NOT care for each other at first. It was definitely not a case of 'will they, won’t they' but more of a 'will he quit or won’t he?'"
"Funny how life works."- Uncle_Bug_Music
Proceed With Caution
"Fun while it lasted, but very awkward after."- BrianH-84
Love cannot, and should not be denied, even if it is a coworker.
Anyone looking for a one and done, however, might want to look beyond the walls of your office.
Unless you like constantly being reminded of your past mistakes.
It can take a lot of courage to put yourself out there and let someone know you're interested.
As long as they're not creepy, aggressive, or crazy, it should be flattering, right?
If you're straight and a person of the same gender as you flirts with you, this should be easy to deal with.
In most cases, it took a lot more courage for them to ask than for you to hear.
The following question has been asked to many a straight guy over the years.
Let's see how the times and reactions have progressed.
Redditor FregeanCoder wanted the heteronormative gents out there to share with us, so they asked:
"Straight men, how would you react if a man hit on you?"
I've flirted with many a straight guy, and 99% of the time, it's all gone over well even if they turned me down.
Be Polite
buster keaton GIFGiphy"I've told them thank you but not interested."
twinturboboosted
"Pretty much this for me as well, no need to get scared, but at the same time I did have one super creep, not a comfortable experience."
Empty_Jellyfish_1995
Happy Endings
"My response was, 'I’m flattered, but it’s not my thing.' Guy insisted on buying me that drink anyway as an apology. Thirty years later, we’re still friends. I was best man at his wedding, and now they’re both like brothers to me."
ElectricTurtlez
"Wow, an 'apology' - for flattering you!? Maybe he felt that he made you uncomfortable. Sounds like a generous and humble person."
BoringBob84
"I wish men could do that when women reject them. For some reason, if a woman rejects a straight man he thinks 'being friends' is like a punishment."
Joygernaut
Aww Shucks
"My wife and I were at a gay bar with some friends and one time while alone a young man offered to buy me a drink… it was the most flattering feeling, which I of course told him as I politely declined. He must have been having a rough patch since he was very attractive and had no business hitting on a guy like me. Or maybe it was late and he was drunk."
corona-lime-us
"You could have been his type. Never know."
twinturboboosted
"Haha. Perhaps. I’ll cling to the possibility. I’m just grateful my wife agreed to marry me before I discovered IPA’s and how to smoke meat!!!"
corona-lime-us
Keeping it
"I had a man I thought was hitting on my girlfriend and telling us both multiple times he was into threesomes tell me in a forceful way at the end of the night was gay. I said ah, that's cool man good for you! He walked away looking kind of sad and defeated. It wasn't until the next day that we realized he was hitting on me and we all had a chuckle at my obliviousness."
Gettinrekt1
No Harm
"Well normally at first I’m polite and say no thanks in some way or straight out. If it ends there it’s amusing no harm done. But just like with women if they are overly aggressive after then it’s a lot different. Ashamed of how common that type of stuff is. It has nothing to do with people's sex life. People are capable of all kinds of things. We know this but seem to act like it doesn’t happen."
_Dirty_Deedz_
OHHHHHH!!!!
Seth Meyers Pain GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy"Probably the same way as when a woman hits on me - be oblivious to it until weeks later when it suddenly dawns on me."
Eccentric_Fixation
I always hate that A-HA moment.
Like, where was my mind at in the moment.
SEE MEEE!!!
Jim Carrey Flirting GIFGiphy"I'm gay, my oldest friend is straight. Took him to a gay bar once. He got very offended that no one tried to hit on him."
J8766557
Why not?
"I'm a straight, bearded, short but pretty muscular guy living in (very liberal) Berlin. Apparently, that's attractive for a lot of gay men so I'm getting hit on by men pretty regularly, a lot more than by women. I usually just tell them I'm not gay and then it depends on their reaction."
"Keep talking, do more drinking, keep dancing... Why not? I've been on the opposite side after a rejection by a woman and it's nice to just keep having a good time instead of an awkward exit that you'll cringe about 10 years later randomly."
Magnetobama
Back when we danced
"Not sure how it works nowadays with apps like Grindr but in the late 90s/2000s, we had a gay club in our city (no longer exists and there’s not another one unless you drive 30 min to a town over). Anyway, I was the straight friend in a group of gay guys because I loved EDM and I think by association, other gay men thought I was gay."
Always flattered, politely said no and they would turn to the next guy waiting in line for a drink and hit on them. Rinse and repeat. I think what I learned is that men regardless of sexual preference are all horny and will try again and again until they find someone down to clown."
irn
Thanks, Corey
"I was at a house party and he started hitting on me. I kind of panicked and said I was dating one of the girls at the party. Went over to her after and asked her to play along because he was hitting on me and I didn’t want to start a fuss. Ended up hooking up with her later that night and 16 years later were married with 2 kids. At our wedding speech, I thanked him even though he wasn’t there. Corey wherever you are, thanks bud."
reload88
Beautiful Hair
"Happened to me by a coworker. I very politely explained I wasn’t gay but it never changed my opinion of him. He eventually thanked me for dealing with it the way I did and I explained it wasn’t necessary to say thanks. I asked him why me though. He replied, 'You’ve got one hell of a head of beautiful hair!' And he was right."
Particular-Paper-558
Be Fair
Criminal Minds Fist Bump GIF by IONGiphy"I flirt a little but make sure he knows I'm straight and there is no opportunity for us to be anything but friends. Gay dudes are some of the best friends a straight guy can have and I don't give a f**k what anyone thinks about that. Just don't lead them on, it's not fair to them."
somedoofyouwontlike
Well it does sound like we've come a long way.
It's nice to know.
Let's flirt.
Whether we realize it or not, we have certain "tells" that will signal to other people what life is like at home, whether we're hard workers or parents or travelers.
Even single men, despite their age, have certain characteristics that can be spotted from a mile away.
Curious, Redditor hamsterdumpster asked:
"What screams 'single male lives here'?"
Questionable Decor
"Anything but a curtain acting as a curtain."
- Some-Nice-Basil
Minimalist By Nature
"When I first heard the description of a minimalist I was confused because as a single male, I had been living like that for years..."
- jnd_photography
A Glimpse into the Bathroom
"Three empty bottles of head and shoulders still in the shower, prob another bottle half full with tons of excess shampoo dried all around the outside."
"A small pile of leftover Irish spring soap bars maybe we can smash 'em together and make a full bar one day."
- Omnivore_Omri_23
Very Elaborate
"There's just a mattress on the floor in the bedroom."
- gambito705
Bottle Collections
"Empty liquor bottles lined up as decor."
- miranda_alexis
No Place for the Garbage
"There's no trash can in the bathroom."
- Iilsmokey
Key Characteristics
"Empty fridge except for a random beer and leftovers. White plastic chair. Everything black...black couch, black picture frames, black desk. Etc."
- elvishranger
Central TV
"A really big single-seat recliner in front of a massive TV with game consoles under it. Not that there's anything wrong with gaming, but there's a certain level of being committed to staying single when you have just one chair in your loungeroom, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Totallycasual
Shaving Day
"Stubble in the sink."
- Ok_Wave_7358
"And behind the sink faucets."
- Urrrsagrrl
National Pride
"A random flag hanging on the living room wall."
- bucktop
New Standard in Bedding Sets
"Using tee shirts as pillowcases. Lol (laughing out loud)."
- Ok-Mood9454
"Can confirm, have done this. They're about the same size and sometimes I can't (be bothered to) find a pillowcase."
- whyamionfireagain
Stereotypical Decor
"According to 90’s romcom/sitcoms: Lava lamp and a beanbag chair."
- sorentomaxx
"Can confirm: I love lava lamps."
- ithinkoutloudtoo
External Closet
"Speaking from experience. I got tired of having a floordrobe so I got an absolutely giant clothes drying rack where all of my clean clothes go."
- Bribase
"'This pile is clean, that pile is dirty.'"
- GSturges
"'...That pile is dirty but wearable.'"
- wageslave645
The Single Man Starter Pack
"Bare white walls or a s**tty poster on them... A large TV with no furniture other than a futon serving double duty as a bed... Beer everywhere, even on the ceiling."
- Barmacist
Enough Said
"All of the pizza boxes."
- somedream
"I called it the leaning tower of pizza."
- TheMohawkMan
While there's nothing wrong with being single, a guy should be mindful of what he keeps in his home, how he behaves, and even how his clothes appear, if he for some reason doesn't want to disclose to others that he's single or living alone.