We all meet thousands of people throughout our lives, and many of them will quickly fade into distant memory shortly after we do. Some, though, manage to affect us so profoundly from a single meeting that we remember them for the rest of our lives.
Whether it's a stranger who was there to help in a time of need, a kind word during a really hard time, or someone who just happened to say exactly the right thing at the right time—sometimes the memory just sticks.
Reddit user direwolf107 asked the folks at r/AskReddit about their profound encounters with strangers, and got some wonderful answers.
10.
I was about 16 and getting the bus home from school. It was always super crowded and and you'd be really lucky to get a spot on before the driver closed the doors and drove off. You could wait 4 or 5 buses before one came along that you could get on.
Anyway, me and my friends had been really lucky that day and managed to squeeze on to the first one, just about. The lady behind us started begging to be let on, saying she had a job interview. The bus driver said he was sorry, but the legally couldn't because of how many people were on. He kept asking us to move down but there wasn't any room and people were starting to get mad and telling him to just go. The woman started sobbing. It was about 2010 so we'd all been hit really hard with the economic crash, and jobs were hard to come by.
Like, it broke my heart. It was the first time I'd really seen an adult publicly in such distress. So my friend and I just got off and she got on. We didn't even look at her or exchange any words. The bus was free for teenagers, all we lost was 30 minutes that we would have normally waited anyway. But my parents were fairly comfortable, I'd never had to face how bad things were before. It feel like a big moment for me.
I still think about her from time to time. I hope she's okay, I hope she got that job. I can't imagine how it must have felt to be that desperate.
9.
I was on my way back from Disneyland Paris, sat in the airport and a guy beside me was typing away on his laptop. A little curious at what he was writing I peeked over and saw the title "the last letter I'll ever write". I was frozen for a few minutes, im 24 and I had absolutely no idea what to do. I thought maybe he was a writer and if I ask ill look stupid. Eventually though I turned round to him and said, "Look man, I really hope I'm making a fool of myself, but are you OK?".
Turns out he and his long term partner had broken up, and they were meant to be coming on this holiday, that he'd now come on with his dad. He blamed himself, and he'd been going to therapy for a while to get out of a a pretty dark place but some days were better than others, and writing the letters was an exercise from his therapist.
We chatted for a bit, about her, his dad, me, life in general. Turned out his brother lived nearby me and frequented a coffee shop right by where I used to live.
Eventually my plane got called, and we hugged and I told him I really hope things get better for him and that at the very least I'd had a lovely time talking to him. We left there and I still wonder what happened to him. I hope he's happy now, I hope that he's managed to find some good in the world again. But I guess I'll never know for sure.
8.
When I was a kid, I flew by myself for the first time. At the airport, when I was about to check in, I spotted an elderly lady looking at me. Deeply. At first I thought I accidentally hit her or something, so I asked if she needed anything. She nodded. Didn't give it much importance so I just checked in and headed to my plane. Later, already on the plane, I see the very same lady, looking for her seat. Of course I helped her and asked her what number her seat was. She handed me her ticket. "B37". I'll never forget it because I was the C37. She sat right next to me. I was scared. I was a kid, and I wasn't used to coincidences. Anyway, long flight.
When we arrived and were waiting for the plane to land for us to head out, she finally says "You know, you really look like my daughter, I even thought you were her! But she passed away 5 years ago, silly me. Here, this is her with my grandkids". She handed me her phone with a zoomed in picture. I was paralyzed when I saw her.
She looked EXACTLY like me. But she was 28 and I was 10. I couldn't even talk. Now that I am older, every time I look in the mirror for my birthday, I remember that lady and the picture. I am a living photo of her daughter. Every year that goes by, is a year that I look more like that woman in the picture.
When I turn 28, I hope this memory will finally scare me less.
7.
Giphy
A stranger I interacted with at Wall-Mart about 4 years ago is still engraved in my brain.
I was with my mom shopping, and we found ourselves at the yogurt section. I love this stuff, so I was looking around at all the flavors pretty carefully. Well, after a little while a searching, a older man came up and started also searching through as well. He was maybe mid 40s or early 50s. I remember him being really tall, and he had a resemblance to my features. He had my build, same skin complexion, same hair color, you name it.
As we're searching through, he chuckles and says how he's gotta find the perfect flavor, and I agree with him. It's like our little mission to find the best kind - it was a lighthearted feeling just searching through the brands and flavors with him. He asks what my favorite flavor is, and turns out we had the same favorite. I thought that was pretty cool.
A little bit more looking through the section goes by, and he introduces himself as John.
My name is Jonathan.
He then found the ones he wanted, which were the same brand as the ones I was getting, and he put them into his cart, smiled at me, and rolled away.
I have not seen him since, but every time I remember the story I can't help but think that there's always a possibility I met my future self - even if it's just a silly idea.
6.
When I was fresh out of college I drove over two hours away for a job interview and got into a car accident like a block away from the building. My car was completely totaled. A woman who was stopped at the stop sign near my accident pulled over and got out to make sure I was okay. I was completely fine physically but have very bad anxiety and immediately had a panic attack. I was sobbing and couldn’t catch my breath and this complete stranger sat with me the entire time telling me to breathe and just being so caring and supportive. She waited with me for the police to come, she helped me talk them through what happened, she called my mom for me, she even called the office I was on my way to so she could let them know about the accident and that I would call them to reschedule my interview. As if that wasn’t enough, once she found out that I was that far away from home and it was going to take my mom two hours to get to me, she CANCELLED HER MEETING THAT SHE WAS ALREADY LATE TO SO SHE COULD DRIVE ME HALFWAY.
She did not think it was a big deal whatsoever. She just stepped up to the plate to help without question. I would have been completely alone and lost without her that day. She was an angel, honestly. I lost her business card between all the paperwork from the accident and I've been kicking myself over it for the last five years. All I want is to call her and tell her how thankful I am and that I've kept her in my thoughts ever since. Roxanne if you're out there, thank you so so much. And please for the love of god send me your last name so I can send you some flowers.
5.
Giphy
I was having a rough day and I thought I'd get an ice cream to cheer myself up. I was standing in the line and this old lady looked at me and asked if I was okay. I said I was fine and just had a rough day. I got up to the front to get my ice cream and she tells the cashier, "I've got this young man, he's had a rough day". She smiles at me and says enjoy your ice cream. I still think of her whenever I have a rough day. I send her my good vibes.
4.
An old man I overheard telling his grandkids that if their dad got accepted to the job he was interviewing for in town, they would move there and then they could visit each other all the time. I never even saw the guy interviewing for the job but I really hope he got it
3.
A year after graduating from a tiny college on Idaho, I was at Disneyland with a high school buddy. I was totally convinced that I saw a college friend, Adam, in line at Pirates of the Caribbean. I kept waving at him, but he looked at me like I was out of my mind. My high school friend tried to talk me down, saying that "Adam" clearly had no idea who I was...it's not him...everyone has a twin...yada, yada, yada.
The line finally snakes around to where I am standing right next to "Adam" so I tap him on the shoulder and ask "hey, aren't you Adam M?" And he says "no, I'm his twin brother Aaron"
34 years later and I still tell that story at parties. I only met Aaron once, in 1986, in line at Pirates, but I do wish him...and Adam...a very happy birthday on Facebook.
2.
I met my husband's doppelganger once. The man looked EXACTLY like my husband. I was eith someone at the hospital waiting for their medical transport to pick us up and I saw who I thought was my husband across the street. My husband was supposed to be at work so I was confused. I called out to him but he didnt respond. My patient and I walked over to him but I stopped short a few feet away because I started to realize maybe it wasnt actually him. His clothes were different and this man was assisting someone in care giving type role -my husband absolutely would not do that.
The guy noticed me staring at him and so I explained why and even showed him a picture of my husband. He swore that was a picture of him and this was all some practical joke. I had to show him pictures of my husband and I together for him to realize the pictures were not of him. This man could have been his identical twin. I often think of that encounter and how insane it was. I also think of the astronomical chances that not only did my husband have a doppelganger but that we lived in the same city for a while and I happened to cross paths with him.
1.
Once I was walking to work past a homeless shelter pickup spot. It was a sunny day, middle of summer. A small lady was standing on the sidewalk wearing rain boots, a yellow raincoat, and wrapped completely in a blue vinyl tarp. As I walked by her, she leaned into me, looked me in the eye and said, "...fish monster...?"
I still think about her. Did she think I was a fish monster? Was she concerned that I had seen a fish monster? Perhaps she felt I was unprepared, and her questioning tone was more about if I'd heard about the potential of fish monsters.
Such a surreally complex interaction in just two words. One thing I know for certain is that whatever the fish monster status was, she was clearly the best prepared of everyone present.
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "🤐" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk to him about it.
I'm a smart person. I read, I study, I comprehend. But certain types of math can send me to the funny farm. I tried trigonometry in high school. I needed a therapist after a week. My brain hates math. It is what it is. I give up trying.
Louder!
Meme Reaction GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"I can't comprehend why any company would think I'm more likely to buy their product if they make their commercial 20db louder than all other commercials. Instant boycott."
The Scale
"The sheer size and scale of the universe. Like the fact that you can fit all the planets of the Solar System between the Earth and the Moon. Now realise how far apart all the planets are in the Solar System. This is practically next door compared to the distance between our Sun and the nearest star."
"There are billions of stars in our Milky Way (with the majority having planets of their own). The sheer scale of the vast emptiness involved means that even when our galaxy merges with the Andromeda galaxy in 4.5 billion years' time, there will be very, very few actual collisions between stars."
"Then there is the void between galaxies, and that it takes billions of years for light, at its speed (massless, and the fastest speed possible), to travel between galaxies, speaks of the sheer emptiness and distance in that void. I can't quite fathom it."
The Before...
"What was there before the universe, what was there before that, and that and that and (you get the idea)."
"The problem is we are using English words that have implied meanings that are familiar to humans on everyday experience to describe events that are outside everyday experience."
"Before" implies that time exists on both sides of an event, but that is not true when we are talking about the universe. Like how there are no positive numbers less than 0, there are no times before the beginning of the universe."
In the Words...
"Language, the fact that we all collectively decided separately and divertingly that certain sounds have meanings and that other sound mixed with those can change the meaning."
"Thanks for all of the upvotes and the award :3."
"Adding onto what I said, sounds are just vibrations in the air that out brains interpret into the sensation of hearing. Really we're vibrating the air at each-other and those air vibrations to your brain contain meaning. When you think about it like this language is not too dissimilar to the internet in a way. Makes you realize how crazy and unique of a skill language really is, with-ought it we wouldn't have a civilization."
"Another interesting thing related to this is when people call your name. Even if your in a crowded area with hundreds of people talking around you and you think your tuning them out if you hear your name you immediately notice, Some part of your brain must be constantly listening."
"Here are some other things my mind can't quite grasp:
- Computers, the fact that my phone is performing countless mathematical operations constantly.
- the plank length, if I understand it right it's the smallest distance anything can move, like a pixel of space.
- the human body and animals in general, were a collection of (large number but idk how large) cells all working together in various systems some how sustaining a brain that is able to be conscious, it's a miracle animals work at all let alone what they're capable of.
- why my ankles crack when I walk.
- what the future will be like, the world is changing so fast it's likely the future will be nothing like we think and it's coming." - Flaer15
I'm Empty
Fun Floating GIF by Tomas BrunsdonGiphy"My little brain can't comprehend the vast emptiness of space and the fact it supposedly just stretches on forever and never has an end. Kind of wild when you try imagine it."
Like any other muscle or organ in the body, we have to listen when pain is inflicted. We have to recognize discomfort and deal. Why don't we allow the same respect to our brain? It will tell us when enough is enough.
Simplicity...
Work Working GIFGiphy"How a simple calculator works. I can do math. I'm actually very good at it. How does a little plastic box do it though? Always boggled my mind."
Dammit!
"Dates. I am considered a historian by my family due to my knowledge on most world history, but God dang dates... I could be talking about WWII and say it happened the same date as WWI."
Billions of People
"That all the others persons I talk to or see, have their own thoughts, own inner dialogue and own life. For gaming analogy sometimes I just feel like others are NPC and I just can't comprehend that there are more than 7 billions person just like me."
"Sonder...
The profound feeling of realizing that everyone, including strangers passed in the street, has a life as complex as one's own, which they are constantly living despite one's personal lack of awareness of it."
Now That's Too Much!
"Quantum physics."
"I have a PhD in astronomy and MSc in Physics, and had to take ~2 years worth of quantum mechanics courses. It's one of those things where you can take solace that even with all that education on it all I can say is no one else really understands it either."
And the Dark?
"Light isn't affected by time. So... other things could just exist outside of time? Like, if you were a photon that traveled at light speed for a million years and then hit an alien's third butt, you'd experience it as instantly being a million light years away."
- Delica
"A photon moves at the speed of light through space, but is standing still in time."
"A person at rest moves at the speed of light through time, but is standing still in space. When you accelerate through space, you're simultaneously decelerating through time. That's why observers will see your clock slow down when you begin accelerating at relativistic speeds. It's referred to as time and space dilation. Makes more sense once you realize that."
The Process...
"There are people who don't have an internal dialogue with themselves. So, they never question if they are right or wrong. They never wonder if they are treating someone fairly, or if they are nice or mean."
"They can change their minds with no information, but it doesn't involve the process most of us go through when confronted with an opinion, or new data. It's not common, but it's not entirely rare. When I learned about this, I just couldn't understand how it was even possible."
The End
Season 2 Episode 10 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy"Death, obviously I understand why people die and all that but just thinking what happens afterwards. What's it like for the said person that died, is it just blackness? Is it like they're dreaming??? Reincarnation?? This probably sounds very stupid but I don't care 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️"
There is so much to learn, and even more that we'll never know. And that's ok. When the brain is full, it's full. Seems like just a part of life. The mysteries will sometimes stay illusive.
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I wanted to give up, I was flustered and spent way too much time trying to get a great grade in a class that just wasn't clicking for me. What did I do? I had to take a step back and reflect on what I would tell a friend in the same shoes. I would tell them they don't need to be perfect, that getting a C+ in one class wasn't going to wreck their whole GPA, and for the love of God drink water too won't just coffee.
Self-care and stealing extra sleep, even just an hour nap, can go a long way to refreshing your drive. The takeaway really was just to show me the same love and support I'd been putting out to those around me. You deserve it, too!
Redditor peachyjams asked:
"What are some tips for a burnt out student?"
The Reddit community gave this user some wonderful tips and tricks to help with student burnout.
Go at your own pace.
“Don't pressure yourself into 4 years. It's OK to take it slower. Balance out your schedule with more enjoyable elective credits if you can, or just take less courses in a semester if possible.”
“Obviously things like financial aid, living costs (if not living at home) and others may play a factor in how many courses you need to take or how quickly you need to complete college, so if you can't take less courses, talk to your advisor or counselor and work with them to carefully plan out each semester so that your coursework is balanced IE: You don't end up accidentally taking Calculus + "Fun," art class that was 1000x more work than you thought it would be in the same semester.”~zachtheperson
“Burnt out doesn't begin to cover it.”
“I feel very qualified to answer this. I have been in college continuously since I was 18, and I'm now 32. I have 2 years to go before finishing my doctorate. I currently have an associate's, bachelor's, and master's. I have also worked the entire time. Burnt out doesn't begin to cover it. Here is how I stay sane:
- Give school as little bandwidth in your life as possible. "Good enough" are the two most beautiful words in the English language. Get Bs on things. Write your assignments and due dates on a master calendar, block off times to get them done, and try to avoid thoughts of school outside of those blocks.
- To increase productivity during your work blocks, use Freedom or something similar. I paid for a lifetime subscription and in one class alone it paid for itself. It just blocks access to your distractions on the phone and computer while you get stuff done.
- Tackle other hobbies in life that you see progress in outside of school. Even if it feels like school will never ever end and you're on a treadmill of misery going nowhere, you can go somewhere in other areas of your life. I'm currently training for a marathon, just started learning cello, I mentor first gen college students, and I'm in a book club. Pick your poison, but try to put away the laptop and push yourself in a non-academic area.
- Your social needs may vary, but try getting together with other people not in your circle of school misery. Join a sports league (yuck for me but maybe not for you). I host regular dinner parties. Volunteer. Now that vaccines are out, make sure you get one then connect with other people.
- DO NOT TAKE A BREAK. When you stop school even for a semester you know what it's like to be happy and not have the weight of misery pulling you down. You won't want to go back. Slog through and just do it.
- Don't reward yourself with damaging things. Don't eat or drink your rewards for school or you will be unhealthy and unhappy when you're done. Reward yourself with something positive instead."
If I had to recommend one book, it would be 'Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle'. Basically, it goes into the science of feeling burned out, why it's bad for you, and how to fix it on a physiological level."
“If you don't want to read the whole thing, if I could distill the most useful information it would be: exercise. The author digs deep into the science (which I love) behind why it works SO DAMN GOOD, but if you hate science and reading, trust me. Go for a run a few times a week, lift weights, dance a lot, just get your heart rate up. Good luck. School sucks."~bicycle_mice
You don’t have to be perfect.
walking dead love GIFGiphy“If you're an A student I would suggest lowering your personal bar. Being constantly burnt out isn't worth the 0.2 difference in your GPA and if you're worried about career prospects there are always comparable fields that aren't quite as competitive.”
“Trying to get an A in every class takes disproportionally more work. If you can get A's and a few more B's while getting to chill every once and a while and not stressing, do that.”~SlightlyOvertuned
Lists are seriously underrated.
If your sensation is of being overwhelmed (i.e. you have an impossible amount of work to do with no end in sight) more than burnt out (you are exhausted and becoming detached from the work), then two tips:
- Realise that it's not infinite. If you stick it out until graduation (and I hope you do!), then many of the problems you're accumulating will be wiped clear. Perhaps your GPA/final grade won't be as good as you want, but remember that whatever you're facing now - this too shall pass. Knowning that there is an inevitable light at the end of the tunnel is useful for me.
- Make a list. If you are the under-organised type, making a list of things to do each morning on a sheet of paper dramatically reduces the stress level that those items cause you. You can implement some fancy to-do software if you prefer but tbh a daily todo is simpler and more effective...”~alexandicity
A book and a blanket? Make it so.
read new york GIFGiphy“When I was a burnt out student I took solace in a comfort zone activity. Something unrelated to my school work that I could dive into for a little while when I needed a break. For me, this was reading the Lord of the Rings.”
“What works for you depends one what's in your comfort zone, but it should be something that you can easily pick up and put down again when it is time to get back to work.”
“To this day, I still read the Lord of the Rings when I get stressed or overworked. In fact, I am reading it now, for the 48th time.”~khendron
Healthy Routines...
“Lots of things you could try! Sleep. 8 hours a day, wake up spontaneously without an alarm and if you feel the need do a 30-90 minute power nap in the afternoon.”
“Meditate daily, 5-30 minutes to start in the morning or whenever you feel comfortable. Limit the consume of caffeine.”
“Plan a healthy diet you can stick to, reducing the amount of junk food first to focus later on the composition of your main meals, snacks and so on. Eat plenty of greens, fruit, nuts and drink mainly water or sugar free drinks.”
“Take cold showers. Those are a huge boost, especially in the morning. Decompress. As someone said, take the days you need to just do nothing during your week. Last but not least, workout! Start small, build the habit and stick to it!“~Tha_Sin
“...it's pretty normal in our over worked society.”
“Burnout is real. It means you have given too much of yourself to something, and you need to recover. While deadlines don't wait, professors often will. “
“You have to communicate with them if you are struggling. If they are worth their pay, they will do their best to accommodate you. It's unhealthy to continue under so much stress. Be kind to yourself.”
“Nearly everyone experiences this at some point in life, and it's pretty normal in our over worked society. Do what you can to clear your mind. Assign yourself a certain number of hours to completely shift gears away from all these responsibilities.”
“Set an alarm if you have to, but give yourself enough time to reach a stage of full body relaxation. You can try walking, meditating, sleeping, whatever your body needs. Just listen to it! There is no shame here. You must care for yourself and keep a balance. Deep breaths, often.”~VaginaWarrior
“Yes to this advice!! Let teachers know ASAP that you are struggling and often they will be able to make accommodations or offer help. Also, looking into counseling services that are offered through the school is definitely worth taking advantage of while that stuff is accessible and free.”~shannonbta
“because a b*tch needs water...”
“My bad day thing is I have to get up, eat (even if it's takeout), put on fresh bedsheets because if I'm having a bad day in bed it might as well be comfortable and smell good, have a shower (even just shoulders down) and go for even a small walk, even if it's to the shop or to get myself that takeout."
“They're not huge things to do but they're very difficult on some days. And I don't always do them all, maybe I just eat and shower, or go for a walk, or just change my bedsheets. But all of them are small tasks that feel like mountains but once I do one or two of them they're so so easy, and I benefit from them all mentally or physically or both."
“And I have a litre bottle of water and cup of tea at my side at all times because a b!tch needs water and there are few things as comforting as a good cup of tea in a warm mug to me."~thisisausername-2021
“I didn't pull a single all-nighter in my 4 years of undergrad.”
- “Don't listen to your fellow classmates who boast about study 60+ hours a week, they're either exaggerating, straight-up lying, or have an incredibly inefficient study method. There will be times where you really need to be studying hard for extended amounts of time (ex. finals week), but for the vast majority of the semester it is completely unnecessary to do that in order to get a good grade.”
- “If you do find that you need excessive study in order to do okay in a course then you need to reach out to your TA(s) and professor. Most universities have free tutoring services, use them.”
- “Seriously just take more breaks and get more sleep. I didn't pull a single all-nighter in my 4 years of undergrad and now that I'm in med school I don't have any need for that either. Without real breaks and sleep your brain's ability to actually store and organize all the information you've studied goes out the window. This is harder to do if you need to work to support yourself but you need to find some semblance of healthy sleeping habits if you want to be able to make it through all 4 years.”
- “Eat real food. Don't just live off of snack foods and coffee, your brain isn't going to work properly if you don't fuel it. It's generally cheaper to buy canned and frozen fruit and veg so if you're on a budget try those aisles. Additionally, most places have some sort of charity or community pantry/soup kitchen, use it if you need to.You don't need to be completely destitute in order to reach out for help from these places, if you are struggling to make ends meet get help from your community. It is not weak, it is not shameful, it's being smart enough to accept that everyone needs help now and then.”
- “I mean it, don't pay attention to classmates and social media influencers who say they spend all their time studying. They almost definitely aren't and if they are they have an unsustainable view towards work/school that will bite them in the butt later on.”~JSD12345
Treat yourself to a mini-vacation.
“If you have any extra money (I know, easier said than done) book the cheapest AirBNB you can find within the area you can get to with the transportation you have available. Go alone or bring a friend, and have a mini-vacation, just for a night or weekend. It's very refreshing to have a change of scenery, even if it's in your same city.”~goshawkgirl
These are some great ideas to help cope with the all to real burnout. Remember to show yourself the grace you give to others because your best is all you can do.
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