I know that so many of ya'll love the chili at a certain fast food restaurant that rhymes with Bendy's, but that stuff's not fresh, okay.
Sorry to burst your bubble. It's a dark, dark secret I've carried inside me for over a decade.
After Redditor Themanfromjapan420 asked the online community, "What is your job keeping secret from customers?" people lined up to share some secrets of their own.
We are all such fools!
"Unbaked"
there's a popular overpriced deli/bakery, also part of a chain, in the rich area near where i live. people always say how "fresh" everything is, how "talented" the bakers are. i always thought their baked goods were dry af but i hadn't been there in years and was looking for a specific cake i knew they had. they accept custom orders but when i was ordering they said they couldn't put vanilla frosting on a chocolate cake???
I kept asking why and the worker kept dodging with a vague "we can't." quickly realized nothing they "bake" is actually made there and that's why their it's so damn dry it's nearly stale. no clue how the hell so many people think there's anything more than a massive fridge in their "kitchen" or why this place is so popular.
"Just Normal"
GiphyI work for a printing company. The amount of jobs that we print that say "printed on recycled paper" and it is just normal paper is astronomical.
"Come on In"
We all know you are high/screwed on some drug. We don't just don't care if you can behave.
Nightclub owner.
If anything, I imagine it's good for business because f*cked up people aren't paying attention to the rate at which they're annihilating money.
"Serving 2%"
I worked at an incredibly under stocked coffee shop once. If someone asked for whole milk I was told by management to tell them we had it, then serve them 2%. Then one day I served a milk farmer. I've never been called out on my crap as fast as the damn milk man himself.
"All the Same"
Our residential and commercial model are the same thing just marketed and priced differently.
But when a person asks what the difference is, we get told to just pull crap out of our butt.
"stronger cooling fans, better waterproofing, stronger locks, better dust filters"
I basically just name all the features and say they're better... 😅
That's disgusting and will probably just surprise them.
"Security"
GiphyI work in a Hotel, and at least in this Hotel our security is crap. I don't wear any id or uniform that proves that I'm actually an employee and can go in and out everytime i want to. So, that means that ANYONE can come and get in the hotel without problem at ANY TIME.
"Phone Plans"
Phone plans are significantly less expensive that what we quote you a lot of the time. TPR wants us to sell you as much literal useless junk as possible that you would not ever agree to paying for, so they make us bundle it in so you don't even think about it. It's pretty shady, but I also got a kid to feed, definitely still searching for better.
"Bubbles"
GiphyThere's actually no difference between a $300 champagne room and a $150 private dance. We're supposed to say it's more private etc, but it's the exact same just with a different price tag.
"The Dealership"
I used to work as a mechanic in a dealership. Women would accuse us of taking advantage of them constantly. Truth is, if a woman would come in for a problem and we caught another, if we could just fix it, we would and the customer would be none the wiser. In fact, if there was a problem we could correct without a part or a great deal of time, we just did regardless.
"Hotel Visit"
I used to be an in city truck driver. And id often deliver to hotels. You can pretty much just walk freely through most hotels, even in the kitchens and back rooms. There's actually lot of places you can just walk freely through, even just in street clothes. If you act like you belong, no one stops you. Sometimes if i had to take my lunch break at a delivery, id throw a flannel shirt over my work shirt and then a safety vest and just walk around with a clipboard in my hand. I got to see a lot of cool places and only got stopped once.
"Trashed"
I worked for a grocery store who made a big song and dance about their "new green initiatives" and had large recycling bins in all our departments, assuring the customers that we were doing awesome!
Then at the end of the night we would just chuck everything in the trash compactor.
"Moving Parts"
GiphyI work in manufacturing and we make parts for companies like Ford, GM, Mercedes etc. Not gonna lie after working in this career I'm surprised most people's car parts and just falling apart with the amount of crap we know that's wrong but we need to meet orders so we send it out anyways.
"Pay Out"
I work for an insurance company so we kind of have to be honest with our customers. But there are a lot of times when claims don't get paid due to an internal issue. You can't just say there's an unfixable problem with the system and that you don't know how long it'll take to get fixed. All we can say is that it's been looked at and should be fixed soon.
"I loved working in geriatrics"
I worked in a long term care home.... I loved working in geriatrics, I still do. I no longer work at this home.... Residents paid $84.00 a day to live in a home that was A) right across from a hospital but the nurses didn't want to send them because they didn't want to pay an ambulance fee. A man died of a brain aneurysm when he was showing symptoms of distress but didn't want to pay for the ambulance that drove them across the street B) if they were short staffed they would serve meals on styrofoam plates because they didn't want to stay late or leave dishes for the next day C) Last straw (then I quit) there was a power outage within this two story facility.... all locked doors opened.... all lights shut off, all elevators stopped working because there was NO backup generator....
I 10000% called the ministry of health and safety to let them know and they told me there were so many violations.... one hour and thirty minutes of discussing this hell hole I'll never get back. PAY ATTENTION TO WHERE YOU SEND YOUR LOVE ONES 💗 PS I do cognitive support with seniors now within an amazing home!
"Shotty Work"
I work in reliability. It's my job to be aware of exactly how sh*tty our suppliers are, and how many end user failures we can expect because of it (there's always an acceptable amount of failures).
So it's okay that your manufacturing is crappy. If companies wanted higher quality manufacturing, they would pay more for it (but they don't, always cutting costs).
"Lost $$$"
GiphyMy boss makes ZERO profit from tobacco/JUUL. If we under order from our distributor and need to get cartons from someplace else, he LOSES money. When we increase our price it's to satisfy the state minimum. He sells tobacco and milk at zero or negative profit so you walk in the door, counting on you to buy other items at 150-200% markup because you're already in there. Milk and tobacco sell themselves, and 50-75% of our customer base buys more than just those two items.
"Fraud"
I worked for Fortune 500 company where my manager deliberately charged customers for hours I didn't work.
Indeed that is good ole' fraud.
"repacking"
Used to work at a private liquor store. We used to spend evenings of beer order days "repacking" the beer using a manual machine of sorts that made both 6 and 8 packs. The rings would come on a big perforated spindle that could be separated with ease after each pair of rings. It was possible to buy 6 packs, but the company saved so much money buying extra 24/36/48 packs for staff to break down into smaller packs.
"All for the $$$"
GiphyIn a lot of cases you can get a college degree for way less than most Universities try to charge. This doesn't really apply to careers where certain prestige or accreditations are required. But in a lot of cases state colleges and even guidance counselors at high schools condition kids or even some adults into thinking that they need to spend a fortune on 4 years at one school to get a degree. The guidance counselors do it because the more of the students go on to a 4 year school, the better the HS looks. The colleges do it because $$$$$$.
"Up in the Air"
Flight attendant.
It is part of my UNIFORM that I carry paperclips 'in case the flap that releases masks doesn't open'. (meaning I could die). It's good to know that the plane that houses 300 passengers is so poorly built that their life could depend on a paper clip that they don't even carry.
"Choke Out"
I worked at a pet store where the grooming salon killed someone's dog. The groomer put it in a hold to clip its nails and choked the dog out. Two workers walked by and commented about how they didn't think it was a good way to restrain the dog.
The general manager told the owner the dog had a stroke. No one was supposed to talk about it. The poor girl tried to give the dog CPR, which was against company policy. She quit shortly after.
"Be Polite"
We hate when customers change their minds on products and leave them scattered at the front end instead of letting us know and hand it to us. We don't mind if you change your mind we just get annoyed that people are too afraid to ask. Its not the end of the world that they don't want a basket or a case of soda.
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"Members Not Only"
You don't actually need to be a member to get in.
I know at Sam's Club, you don't necessarily need a membership to come inside. But you do need a membership card to actually purchase anything.
"Third Party Issues"
I work for a worker's comp third party administrator, so while not an adjuster we're the middleman for the adjuster and most injured workers don't really know the difference. It doesn't bring me any joy to tell people they're denied or tell them their authorization is still pending after 3 weeks.
Some of that comes down to crappy or unresponsive adjusters, but the biggest issue is usually the doctors.
I have to explain multiple times a day to patients that we would be happy to approve their medical treatment, but everything is on hold because the referring physician didn't: fill out the form, filled out the wrong form, left required areas blank, put the wrong body part/diagnosis (this happens with alarming frequency), didn't sign it, didn't specify a quantity for something, didn't submit supporting medical notes, and refuses to answer our calls, our fax requests, our emails, the adjuster's calls and emails, their employer's calls, and the bat signal we sent up.
"System is Updating."
When someone in IT screws up a software system and we need to get it running again, we just put up a message on the login screen that says:
System is Updating.
That sounds much better than:
The IT guy screwed up, so your system that you pay monthly fees for is down. We are scrambling to fix it.
"shouldn't you be shocking them?!"
GiphyContrary to popular belief, you CANNOT, I repeat, you CANNOT defibrillate someone who has flat lined. Those are only used to regulate abnormal rhythms such as ventricular fibrillation. If someone has flatlined, you do compressions and push drugs to help get some form of pulse back.
Source: was an EMT, now medical student. You'll be surprised how many people ask "shouldn't you be shocking them?!"
"Yelped"
Despite being the 2018 #1 Restaurant on Yelp, they heat up their meat for their sandwiches & cook eggs inside a microwave. Glad I don't work there anymore. The family isn't as nice & friendly as they portray themselves on social media.
"Wino"
GiphyI'm a bar back at a winery, if we say we're out of a particular wine, we're not, there's like 15 boxes of it in the basement.
"basic borders"
Back when I worked at Borders they told us if we suspected someone was shoplifting that we should approach them and ask if they needed help finding anything. It was supposed to make them think twice about stealing and maybe put back what they were taking since it made them feel like they were gonna get busted.
"Climb Every Shelf"
Sometimes the load of new merchandise completely blocks access to the backstock shelves. It takes time to work through the load and get it all onto the sales floor/on the backstock shelves.
If that is the case, and you ask "if we have any more in the back", the answer will be no - even if we actually do have your item in backstock.
No one is going to climb through the load to find what you're asking for. Come back on a different day and see if it's on the shelf then.
"Gagging"
Back when i worked in a deli at a very well known grocery/retail store all across america i found the most hideous displays of food safety violations. This included a tub filled with chicken water (bits of cooked chicken and grease that came off racks that were soaked in water) that hadn't been changed in over 4 months. The smell alone almost knocked me out while i hard core gagged. This was where we stored racks to cook rotisserie chickens on without cleaning the racks before we reused them.
Showed my manager and she said she was "working on it". Cue this for another few months (me asking whenever i saw her to tell me how to fix it) and she was always "working on it" and "don't worry". I quit due to that and many other violations that weren't being fixed and moved to another retail/grocery chain located in the midwest. Much cleaner deli.
"won't sell kittens or puppies"
GiphyThe cats at our store might be from reputable rescues, but the hamsters/lizards/etc we sell sure as sh!t come from animal mills.
Kind of screwed up for a business that spouts how wonderful they are because they "won't sell kittens or puppies" because of the issue with mills.
"Dumpster Queen"
I work for a Dairy Queen and well it's not as bad as some other places but well if you liked fast food you wouldn't after seeing what goes on in that kitchen. I've seen just about everything food that's been dropped on the floor be served, sour milk in one of the machines, lettuce soooo old it turned into a soup, dumping of fry grease into the dumpster.
"The Menu Lies"
I worked for a fancy country club who bought their food from Walmart. I also saw frozen stuff like Stouffers lasagna. A LOT of stuff wasn't fresh at all. A lot of stuff was made, then frozen and then reheated later. I bet if the members found out they'd be freaking pissed!
"filth"
GiphyWe only clean the restrooms on Mondays... It's a school... But small and it's cleaned well I promise don't worry I definitely do my job well.
"1 accident at a time"
Fast food: We drop crap on the floor all the time. The pizza box, a chicken wing, the hot pan grabber. It all just gets picked up, put into the fryer for a moment, or run under the faucet for a second and put right back into use. Diversifying microbiomes 1 accident at a time.
"I worked at a deli/coffee shop..."
I worked at a deli/coffee shop that was part of a local chain. Most of the baked goods arrive frozen and half-baked, and half the soup is day-old.
"I worked in the infant room..."
I worked in the infant room at a day care and I saw so many kids take their first steps. We were supposed to lie through our teeth about this. We would tell the parents their kids were getting close and to keep the camera ready.
We had a new girl who refused to lie about this and allowed a little girl to walk to her mom at pick up. I saw that mom weeping in the parking lot when my shift ended a few minutes later.
A lot of parents deal with a lot of guilt over putting their kids in daycare. If the parents feel like they're missing important milestones it can be really hard. So we just let them have it.
"I've worked at..."
GiphyI've worked at two different restaurants that advertised "fresh squeezed orange juice" on the menu, but it was really Minute Maid from a dispenser.
"Back when I worked..."
Back when I worked for a rather popular clothing store, here in the UK. Customers would come into the store on Christmas Eve and ask if the items they wanted to buy would be cheaper in the boxing day sales. We had to say we didn't know, and wouldn't know until head office sends us the price lists after the store closes on Christmas eve.
The truth is, we knew a week in advance what the sale prices would be. We could even check the sale prices whenever we wanted. In fact, when you ask a member of staff to check if they have other sizes im stock, they would scan the barcode on the shop floor. Using a handheld scanner to check the stock they had in the store room.
Right there on that scanner, they have the current price, future sale prices, and any promotional offers on that item. As well as a list of every available size the item comes in and how much stock they have.
Management would tell us to keep future sale prices secret so the store could reach monetary sales targets.
"I used to work..."
I used to work at a well known pizza place and most of the time I worked in the back answering phones and washing dishes and every time I made a order we always add coupons just to be nice even if they're being a big pain. We would add one or two coupons.
"Retail here."
Retail here. At least at the company I work for (and to the extent of my knowledge), nothing.
From my vantage point, customers inexplicably think we're hiding something, when we're actually not.
"The same store..."
GiphyI used to have a small side job at a billion dollar chain grocery store. Every few hours they would say "Attention associates, recycling is now open" over the loudspeaker. There was no recycling. It just meant someone had the door to the outside trash cans open.
The same store also hourly played a recording of 2 separate voices saying "Security, please check section 3" over the loudspeaker. There was no security.
"We know..."
Worked at a dentist for a few years. We know when you've completely neglected your oral hygiene for the past six months and tried to fool us by flossing five minutes before you walk in the door. We might not say it, but we know.
"Ask for an employee..."
Ask for an employee to run an analysis of your wireless phone bill. Ended up saving my parents $45 a month.
Ewww: People Break Down The Worst Food Sins They Can Imagine
Reddit user Shozo459 asked: 'What’s the worst food sin you can imagine?'
When it comes to culinary mashups, nothing is as delectably perfect as a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. Chocolate and peanut butter in one bite? Heavenly.
Other food combos are not as popular but have a strong contingent of fans like pineapple on pizza or even peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
And then there are ones that are simply inexcusable.
Curious to hear examples of what foodies absolutely consider tastey bites, Redditor Shozo459 asked:
"What’s the worst food sin you can imagine?"
Trust the preparation.
That Is Soy Not Funny
"ketchup on sushi."
– BattleCatManic
I do believe you'd get your a** kicked for doing that."
– Mattress_Of_Needles
No Sauce Required
"Reminds me of this random sushi joint in osaka. Every pc had the wasabi inserted already. If the piece doesnt have a sauce (like eel), then its premarinated or salted. For normal fish, the chef brushes it with some kind of soy sauce blend."
"He reminded me that soy sauce would not be necessary almost every time he put a new piece on my plate. I asked what the soy sauce bottle is for then and he just shrugged."
"And we're talking about soy sauce not even ketchup."
– gabu87
Tough Meat
"Ok, not sushi, but. (I heard this from my kid....) My ex remarried to a southern woman who fancies herself to be a southern Belle. Instead, she's more of a Momma June. My ex cooked steaks for dinner one night. He will cook meat so it is BROWN straight through. Don't think about asking for it any way, but WELL DONE. In his world, any PINK in the beef means it's nearly raw.😳 So he cooked steaks for them. The wife starts eating and exclaims, 'This steak is soooo good it doesn't even need ketchup' My kid described the meat as being extremely tough and tasteless."
– stalagit68
That's just rude.
Expired Offer
"Eating my fries after I've asked you if you want me to buy you some."
– iggylevin
"So you've met my ex-wife? 'I'm fine' is a small fry and milkshake or frostee. And yes, she should use her words , but she won't, so you can choose to be right or to not have to sleep on the couch over fries and a milkshake."
– Jimmy_Twotone
Chili & Cinnamon
"Although it's not the worst sin imaginable, there's a weird regional dish where i live that involves pairing a bowl of chili with a cinnamon roll. Every potluck I've been to here has it. It's not for me but it's definitely unique."
– MayorOfVenice
Citrus Sin
"Orange juice flavored toothpaste and toothpaste flavored orange juice."
– shhjustwatch
"I gargle with orange juice after i brush my teeth. Power move. Show that plaque who's boss."
– MayorOfVenice
Who does that?
Gimme Some Skin
"Eating the skin off of someone else's fried chicken."
– Upbeat_Tension_8077
"I had a bucket of leftover KFC in the fridge, and my ex SIL came over to my house while I was at work and ate all of the skin off the chicken. I was f'kin pissed."
"Then, on New Years, a few years later, her aunt wanted to make mole and split the cost. I was like whatever and pitched in. I had things to do and got home after it was done. Those f'kin b*tcheses had ate the all of the skin off every piece of chicken."
"I'm so glad I'm not a part of that POS family anymore. If I am ever victimized by chicken skin theft ever again I am going to throw that skinless piece of chicken at them as hard as I can at point blank range and I'm going to aim for their mouth."
– anon
Condiment For All
"Squeezing ketchup on top of a communal plate of fries."
– OverlappingChatter
"I had a boyfriend who would take all of his fries and all of my fries at McDonald’s, put them on the tray and squirt ketchup on top. This infuriated me in part because then the fries got cold so much faster."
– loritree
Wasting food is a cardinal sin.
Grocery Stores At The End Of The Day
"Grocery stores/suppliers throwing out perfectly good food when we there are people starving."
"There is a 2009 doc called 'Dive' that talks about how much grocery stores waste. Edit: (I'm sure there are many others but this is the one that made me aware of the issue)"
– moosegoose2222
"My husband did the samples at Sam's club for awhile and when they did alcohol samples they were told to bust/break the glass bottles into the food that was leftover and to be disposed in the dumpster...so first throw the food in, then break the glass bottles on top when throwing in dumpster."
– Swivel_D
Kevin Sucks
"I worked at a major big box grocery/everything else store for a short time. The a**hole store director was the kind of guy who would make one of the grocery guys get put the floor zamboni on SATURDAY AFTERNOONS to clean up footprints down the aisles when it snowed outside. Of course, it pissed people off."
"The worst thing he'd do, however, was demand that the bakery and Deli have their cases overstocked to 'Grand Opening' standards every f'king day. Of course, only half sold, and the leftovers were not marked down (he hated doing anything like that for damaged boxes or cans because he said it attracted 'poor people'). Instead, it all went into the dumpster at the end of the night. It was usually a half dozen cakes, a dozen loaves of bread, and often 15 - 20 rotisserie chickens. No, employees were not allowed to take home any of it. Oh, and he was openly racist and tried to get a disabled employee fired because he didn't like disabled people working with the public."
"I rage quit that job one day, two weeks before Christmas. I found out shortly after I left that the store director was diagnosed with Parkinsons."
"Rot in hell, Kevin."
– WhitePineBurning
My gripe is more about dining protocol than actual food.
I'm pretty much allergic to alcohol and aside from having the occasional glass of wine, I don't drink often when I go out.
I don't think it's fair when I'm out with a small group of people who each order more than two cocktails and I'm forced to split the bill evenly as the lone non-drinker in the group.
I get it, it's a hassle figuring out the bill to accommodate for me, but I don't mind sorting it out as there are apps to make this easy.
I think it's classy when other members of the group point out that they should chip in more for the bill so I don't have to pay my full share.
But I also hate having to speak up and say, "Umm, can you guys pay for your own drinks since I didn't order any?"
I'm screwed either way since I sound like a loser when I do voice my request or I get passive aggressive afterward for not speaking up.
Anyone know a good solution on how to deal with this?
Anyone who grew up with one or more siblings is bound to have stories of how their siblings occasionally (or frequently) got on their nerves.
Indeed, some people don't even have any sort of relationship with their siblings once they fly the nest.
Those who grew up only children, however, often have trouble accepting that people would cut their siblings out of their lives.
While being an only child can often mean getting your parent's complete love and attention, it also means that you will have to go through many of life's challenges alone, with no peer to turn to for support.
Not to mention, never having anyone to torment and boss around, as many children dream of doing to their younger siblings.
Redditor BroccoliniCarrot was curious to hear what only children thought was the biggest disadvantage of growing up with no siblings, leading them to ask:
"What’s the worst about being an only child?"
Lack Of Playmates
"When I was little, people would give me board games like Monopoly for gifts, and I wouldn't have anyone to play with."
"even Hungry Hungry Hippo sucked playing solo."
"I did master Solitaire though!"- Jesikabelcher
Last One Standing
"When my parents die that’s it."
"I’m just alone."- undertheraindrops
"Family is the most likely group of people to help you when things get tough."
"When your parents pass you have less support."
"Also, aging parents become solely your responsibility."- rubixd
"Taking care of an elderly parent with no one to help."- 3Gilligans
No One To Turn To
"When you are the only one to support your aging parents."- Fantastic_Leg_3534
Forced Independence
"I think because I am an only child I have become used to spending time on my own."
"As a result I am quite antisocial.'
"I don’t mind being around people and can be quite talkative however it exhausts me and I need far too much time on my own to recover."- OstneyPiz
"You become TOO comfortable with being alone all the time, to the point where being alone is the default and interacting with others feels like a chore."
"And that doesn't play out too well in the real world."- DeathSpiral321·
Going Through It Alone
"No one to have a sanity check with."
"My wife and closest friend have siblings and they talk about a close bond with their respective siblings where they could look at the other and effectively say 'mom/dad are crazy, right?'"
"Being an only, I thought some of the sh*t they pulled growing up was normal."
"Having a sibling would have helped counter the gas lighting from parents."- RennSport5280
Making Your Own Conversation Partners...
"As an adult, I sometimes find it difficult to quiet the self-talk because all too often growing up it was all I had."-GreenDolphin86
More For Me?
"I am absolutely not good at sharing."
"Plus and minus was that I got all of my parents' attention, so I had a lot of love and support but also a lot of expectations and not a lot of space to f*ck up."
"Nowhere to hide, no one to blame anything on, and no backup when they were being unreasonable."
"But I also didn't have to split time, affections, or personal belongings with some other gremlin sharing my DNA."=Justheretolurkyall
No One To Keep You In Line...
"No reality check."
"Nobody to confirm that, no, it's not you that's acting nuts."
"Later, nobody to bounce ideas and behaviors off of, nobody to tell you, 'hey, X thinks you're cute' or 'that's not how you ask a girl out, doofus, say this'."
"I should mention that for various reasons, if I had had siblings they would have been older."
"So when I imagine not being an only child, I tend to imagine being a younger brother."
"But I think the reality-check thing would still operate even as an oldest sibling; plus I might have learned to handle responsibility earlier."- ElderPoet
There Is, Indeed, Safety In Numbers
"I am the only son of a single mother."
"I hate this term, but it's called emotional incest."
"Basically my Mom was very young when she had me and there were no men in her / my life."
"As a result, she placed all of that emotional needs of a grown woman on to me."
"My Mom never really raised me as a son."
"At best, she raised me like a little brother she got stuck with after our parents died."
"At worst, she treated me like I was a toxic boyfriend."- ANerdCalledMike
No Scapegoats
"All eyes are on you- can’t get away with anything!"
"Most strict parents ever ( they were older too)."
"Unlike my husband's family growing up with 6 kids."
"Parents hardly knew where the teenagers were or who they were with."- Available_Honey_2951
"When asked by a parent what happened you cannot blame your sibling."- nanodecay
The Eye Of TheBeholder
"People assuming that I was spoiled."- Purlz1st
Having no siblings means never being bullied, teased or tormented, or having to vie for your parent's attention.
Something many people who grew up with older or younger siblings openly say they dream of.
When the going gets tough, however, and these same people realize they always had their brothers or sisters to turn to, they might bite their words and regret ever even thinking of being an only child.
Many couples like to spice things up in their relationships to keep things fresh.
When it comes to bedroom spices, couples tend to add ingredients, like another person to the mix.
But everyone really needs to be on the same page with who they're mixing with.
Or drama can ensue.
Redditor MrRandyWatson_100 wanted to hear about what happened to relationships after inviting a third, so they asked:
"Redditors who have had a threesome with their SO, how did the relationship turnout after sex?"
Bad Things
Tim Robinson No GIF by The Lonely IslandGiphy"It was already horrible, that's why I didn't mind trying it. It didn't get any better, but it was a lot of fun."
Educational_Dust_932
Thanks, Jerry
"Went on a vacation with my ex and her best friend from out of state. It was heavily alluded to that we were going to give a threesome a go. We all arrive at the hotel, and her friend turns on the TV while we unpack. It was by chance an episode of Jerry Springer (or some equivalent type of show). The subject was 'Our threesome ruined my life.' Obviously, it didn’t happen."
sincethenes
"Wanna hear a pile on to that? We broke up a few years later, I haven’t seen or heard from her in years. I bought a new home two years ago in the middle of nowhere. I go to the local grocery store, and there she is. Turns out she lives about 1/4 of a mile away from me. Thanks, Universe."
sincethenes
Then Again...
"We all went out to eat breakfast the next day and it was just such a funny experience. We laughed and talked about how crazy it was. Afterward, my girlfriend was embarrassed and said she didn't want anything like that ever again. Then it happened again (at her own insistence, with the same girl)."
"Then again. After the 3rd time, I was pretty blown away that this would be a regular thing. After a while things stopped and my girlfriend went back to being super embarrassed about it and liked to pretend it never happened."
Kogah
Well bye now...
"The sex was fine, we invited a third for a fun night at a hotel with a jacuzzi and drinks. But then the third person didn't leave, nor did they leave in the morning after breakfast, and the next night after dinner we literally had to ask him to leave so we could continue our vacation as a couple in privacy. It gave us a funny story to joke about for years and didn't affect our relationship."
Mister_IceBlister
Realizations
Shocked Sesame Street GIFGiphy"Haven’t been in a threesome, but my gf had two on the same day with her previous partner, which is when she realized she was actually into girls more."
"So in a way, I can thank those threesomes for my relationship. She doesn’t like it when I bring this up lol."
DreaDreamer
Epiphanies can come at the strangest times.
Whoops
Schitts Creek Oops GIF by CBCGiphy"My girlfriend asked me who I would like a threesome with. Then she got angry. Apparently, I was supposed to name only one person."
arvigeus
Long Stories
"I (M) hooked up with a friend and his wife a few times. He originally proposed it as something she would enjoy, with both of us focusing our attention on her. She reluctantly went along with it but quickly got way too into it for his comfort. He got jealous of all the attention she was getting despite that being the point of the threesomes in the first place."
"Long story short, after many long fruitless discussions and a few arguments we finally got him to admit that he was in love with me, he wanted the threesome so that we (he and I) could have sex (despite us having had many conversations in the past about how I'm not that into men and he's definitely not my type) without cheating or him getting a divorce."
"Longer story even shorter, we're no longer friends, they're divorced, wife and I became really close friends for a few years."
tempUN123
Happy Holidays
"Relationship with who, your SO or the third person involved?"
"My SO brought her very close female friend for a threesome as a Christmas present to me one year. I was really nervous but they made me feel super comfortable and able to just enjoy the experience. I'm still with my SO and the friend is still a friend, we don't see her very much as she lives in a different country but it's in no way awkward."
AverageMale31
Surprise
"I had a threesome with one of my close friends and her boyfriend of like 5 years (at the time). She wanted to surprise him and boy did it work. It was fun! We ended up doing it a few more times. They’re still together and doing well and my friendship with them has never changed. The only difference is now we have inside jokes and references together!"
wineshivers
Be Careful
Bedtime Threesome GIF by PantayaGiphy"Just fine... But don't play with others if your relationship isn't on solid footing and your communication isn't up to par."
Misophonic4000
"In my experience, sometimes you think you’re on solid footing, but in reality, it’s a house of cards easily toppled. In retrospect, it was f**ked either way, but this definitely expedited the end."
AdmiralTiberius
Not all fun ideas are good ideas.
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
Have you ever gone back to your elementary school as an adult and been amazed that everything looked smaller than you remembered?
It's a great example of how our perception of the world around us is shaped by our own experiences and where we are in life.
As a child everything seems big because we're small.
Our childhood perceptions of other things were also skewed. Things that seemed grand luxuries became ordinary or mundane as we aged.
Reddit user SinkingFeelingBruh asked:
"What did you think was fancy as a kid that isn’t?"
Mc's Steakhouse
"Getting to eat McDonald's all the time..."
~ 02red
"This was my first thought, and it was also the first comment I came across opening the thread."
"You are so right..McDonald's used to be so exciting. I don't even eat it anymore."
~ kasparzellar
GiphyWith or Without Crusts
"Cutting sandwiches diagonally."
~ 787la57la47al
"As a college student, I love dressing up my husbands plate when he eats mediocre meals. If he wants a sandwich, I will dress it up like it’s fine dining."
"I made us air fries nuggets and had the ketchup dots and swirls garnishing the plate lol. It makes things more fun."
~ ireallyamtired
Cocktails for Children
"Shirley Temple/Roy Rogers drinks."
"I remember when my parents would take us to a 'fancy' restaurant and we would be able to order these."
"I felt so adult! With the skinny straw and the maraschino cherry..."
~ Iron_Chic
"Okay but low key though… I still love myself a Shirley temple."
"Like if someone were to offer me one I definitely wouldn’t turn it down."
~ faithle97
GiphyWelcome to the Club
"As a kid I thought going to a restaurant and having a club sandwich was the height of sophistication. Probably because I learned about club sandwiches from a family friend who introduced me to them."
"I used to think the little toothpicks with the plastic frills that held the sandwiches together were sooooo fancy. I always brought my toothpicks home with me to play with."
~ Bebe_Bleau
Processed Foods
"My friends whose kitchens were filled with junk food like Captain Crunch, Twinkies and Ding Dongs, hot dogs and American cheese."
"I thought they were so fancy and I was so jealous."
"My mom cooked from scratch every day, and we thought we were so neglected because she wouldn't buy that sh*t for us to eat."
"We were so lucky. Thanks, Mom."
~ riceme0112358
GiphyOoh la la!
"Viennetta ice cream cake was the peak of fancy for me."
~ KaleidoscopeVast9290
"I came here to say this! They marketed it really well to 7-14 year olds."
~ Holiday-Armadillo-34
The BIG Box
"Back in my day, kids who had Crayola 120 colored pencils were considered the elites of society."
~ Prism_Red
"Or the Crayola Crayons with the sharpener on the back."
~ Spoozle64
GiphyA World Tour in a Mug
"A cup of General Foods International Coffee to cap off your five star evening. Might I recommend the Suisse Mocha?"
~ Smooth_Riker
"That was upper class shiz that I begged my parents to buy for company."
"Turns out, Folgers out of the red can was all encompassing; for home and company. Sigh."
~ burgerg10
"My 10 year old self would walk around my room sipping a cuppa and pretending I was grown in my own apartment."
~ odd_kumquat
It's the Foil Wrapper
"Ferrero Rocher chocolate."
~ SirRobynHode
"Richard Gere did the commercials in a tux. I thought these must be the most fancy and expensive chocolates imaginable."
~ Either-Durian-5517
"Dude I'm 22 and they're still fancy to me."
~ rubbersoulelena
GiphyUnder Glass
"Desserts in the display cases (eclairs, bon bons, petifores, etc...)."
~ Med_Vamp
"This jogged my memory of those iced cookies they’d have on display at Giant (American grocery store)."
~ nicheencyclopedia
Pardon Me, Do You Have Any?
"For some reason, as a kid I thought Grey Poupon was some fancy delicacy by the French. I imagined some fancy guy with a gray wig slathering it on a baguette."
"Like only the rich had access to it."
"It’s just mustard. WTF. Still haven’t had it."
~ JackfruitCurry
"When I got married, my dad insisted upon renting a Rolls Royce to take hubs and me from the church to the reception."
"I jokingly asked the driver 'pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?' in my snootiest faux-British accent. He popped open the glove box and there it was!!!!"
~ RefugeefromSAforums
GiphyBeep, Beep
"Old cars from fancy brands."
"Kids are always like 'whoa he drives a BMW' without realizing it's not impressive to drive a 1999 BMW in 2023."
~ slightofhand1
Get Some Quarters for the Bed
"Hotels were the fanciest as a kid, weren't they?"
~ Non-opisthokont
"I thought a motel or an inn was fancier than a hotel."
~ tobiiam
"Omg, yes! Lol, the vibrating beds were so fancy & fun! I’d always beg my parents to get me one."
~ Sad-Comfortable1566
Jumping Michael Chiesa GIF by UFCGiphyBut There's Cheddar in the Biscuits
"Red lobster."
~ MonsoonMermaid
"A guy I worked with (in the 90’s) said he treated his women right."
"When he went out to eat, he took them to places like Red Lobster. What a baller!"
~ eastcoastme
"Oof, I took my junior prom date to Red Lobster back in ‘00. Sorry, Michelle…wherever you are."
~ kyd712
The Beer Fridge
"I thought that having a second, older fridge in your garage meant your family was rich.
"Actually, hell, if you had a garage at all I thought you were rich."
~ CoolBugg
"Didn’t realize people used their garages for cars for YEARS. I still have a hard time wrapping my head around it."
"It feels like such a waste of storage space to keep a car in there. Where else do people keep lol their tools, holiday decor, and sh*t they don’t want to throw out but also don’t want to use anymore?"
~ Ithinkillgrowthis
"When we bought our house it came with a fridge in the garage."
"I audibly gasped."
~ Aggravating-Dig-8987
GiphyMy Father was in the military, but didn't want to live on United States Navy bases, so we lived off base in a trailer.
Back then, trailers were much smaller and easily moved from place to place. So each time my Father was stationed at a new base, our trailer was packed up and moved to a new trailer park near the new base.
Because of this life of trailer parks, my idea of luxury living wasn't a mansion—it was a double-wide trailer.
What did you think was fancy as a kid?