Advice can be a fabulous gift. Therapists give great advice, as do bartenders. And sometimes that odd family member you discount and the random stranger may have a pearl of wisdom to gift. But hopefully before they spoke they thought. There are many times when "advice" isn't warranted. We all, in fact, do not know everything. Just food for thought before we speak. Case in point....Redditor u/wulvii wanted to hear about what advice no one needs to hear no matter how much we think we should give it by asking..... Disabled/Chronically Ill Redditors, what's the worst piece of advice someone has given you to "cure" your illness/disability?
Seek the Sun....Dog Sunbathing GIF by MOODMAN Giphy
Lupus here with bad photosensitivity.
Go out in the sun and exercise so I can get more vitamin D.
Into the brain....
I have chronic migraines and have been getting about 15-20 a month since 2017. A well-meaning Facebook friend suggested I put a banana peel on my forehead because "your body will absorb potassium into the brain."
Yes, my six different meds, physical therapy, rigid sleep and eating schedule, Botox injections, etc. that the PA, my primary doctor, and my neurologist all recommended didn't fix my migraines but they read the banana peel thing on the internet so it had to be true!
2 different kinds of teas....
I was told to drink a mixture of different cooking oils (like a cup of oils) mixed with sage, oregano, 2 different kinds of teas and something else. Someone convinced my family member that that concoction would stop my organ failure.
Another said I needed to visit her magical vet who would know exactly what to do to fix me. I should also get off pain medication cause that was what was causing my organ failure not the string of birth defects I had.
Needless to say, I didn't do any and I'm now post transplant surgery doing much better. No where near perfect but good enough for me. Family still offering stupid advice to "fix" me so now I get irate and sarcastic at the mention of juice cleanses and foot pads that pull out "toxins".
Upchuck....vomit GIF Giphy
Eat more to cure chronic nausea which prevents me from eating.
How many people have asked you if you are gluten intolerant? That's the first thing I get from everyone except my doctors.
My mom is fun.
Vitamins instead of Ritalin for ADS. Also Vitamins for Autism. Also, never ever get vaccinated because Autism. My mom is fun.
My spouse has autism and asked me once "So I already have the autism. Should I still get the vaccines? What do they think will happen? Will it level up my autism? Will I then have autism 2.0? Are they afraid of level 2 autism? I'll take over the world, won't I?"
Leave me alone love....
One of the major advantages that being a double (leg) amputee has over other disabilities: Generally, nobody thinks they can cure you.
EDIT: Freaking Hell. Never-mind the "advantage" part. And yes, I do have a sense of humor about it... to a point. If you had come up to me out of the blue and made some of these comments, I'd have laughed it off and gone about my day, but I JUST got through saying that I took some small amount of solace in the fact that people DIDN'T say this.
For bladder issues - "drink more water", "drink less water", "have you tried cranberry juice?" (It actually sucks since it's acidic and makes things worse)
My favorite : "have you heard of kegels?" No. I've had this problem for years and years, been to multiple doctors, and I have never, ever, heard of kegels. Thanks. I'm cured. Kegels.
More than liquid...Cocktail Fancy GIF by KeVita Drinks Giphy
Drink apple cider vinegar— from a doctor. She then consented to order a scan. I needed surgery ASAP, turns out.
I was checking in for a doctor's appointment for an unrelated procedure. The nurse saw on my chart that I have celiac disease, so she recommended I go see the Medical Medium, who, I kid you not, is a man who claims to cure chronic illnesses by talking to dead people. She said he could "cure my celiac", an autoimmune disease that does not have a cure. This REGISTERED NURSE actually wrote down his name on a post-it and handed it to me before continuing to check me in for an MRI. It was surreal.
Not in GNCFitness Workout GIF by Supplement Giant Giphy
Years ago a fellow patient recommended a supplement she swore by. Went to GNC and it was pricey enough to cause me to delay the purchase. A couple of days later it was banned by the FDA due to more than a few sudden deaths. I think I dodged a bullet.
But have you tried being healthy?
My wife has chronic fatigue syndrome. For over a decade she has been dramatically limited in her ability to work, socialize, take care of chores - you name it, she struggles to do it. And here's the thing with CFS: you know you have it when all your tests say you're healthy; when diet changes, rest, and exercise don't help; and when you've been sick like that for a long time.
Generally, the worst advice she gets is the well meaning, simple advice. "Have you tried going to bed earlier/later, waking up earlier/later, eating more or less of this substance, going for walks or doing weights or..."
It's not the worst advice because it's even bad advice for general health. Nobody we know is telling her to inject bleach or drink colloidal silver. It's the worst advice because it's so thoroughly condescending. It amounts to saying "I've made no attempt to understand your condition, but have you tried not being a helpless moron and doing this incredibly simple and obvious thing?"
If you know someone with a chronic condition and you hear about some research, or a medical trial, or anything along those lines they'll probably be happy to hear about it, even if they've heard about it ten times before. But "I know you are sick, but have you tried being healthy?" will not make them feel better.
Love the Bdrag race drugs GIF Giphy
I had a family member tell me I should wean off my beta blocker medication with B Vitamins. Without my beta blocker, I am bedridden. B vitamins aren't going to do anything for that (plus most B vitamin pills make me throw up).
Had a doctor tell me my chronic utis were just mind over matter and that if I just told my bladder to relax, it would. Turned out the chronic utis were from nerve damage due to a progressive spine condition that would have eventually destroyed the use of my legs, bladder, and bowels without surgery.
We all get the do yoga/gluten free/accept Jesus Christ into your heart, etc suggestions I'm sure.
I have PCOS and possibly endo... my favorite piece of advice is to "ignore it" because "it is all made up and in your head"
Yeah, no. I have ultrasound and bloodwork results that say something much different.
A few decades ago the common advice for women who had PCOS/endo/terrible cramps/horrible periods in general was "wait until you're married, it will go away." Because obviously your hormones will start acting differently once you sign legal papers.
WALK!!snakes miracle GIF Giphy
A random middle aged man on the train to Busan looked at my cane and gave me some exercises that I could to to fix my leg, basically to will it to be cured. He had no idea what the problem was. It was so weird.
The Silver Bullet....
Everybody has had trouble falling asleep at least once, so everybody thinks they're qualified to diagnose and treat clinical chronic insomnia.
Shut the hell up about limiting screen time and warm milk and turning the AC on. I've tried everything you can think of in every combination already, but sure, your solution is definitely gonna be the silver bullet.
I recently told my father that accepting my irregular sleep/wake cycle has been the first thing in a long time that's improved my quality of life and productivity. He immediately began to tell me that I should "use that forward momentum and focus on having a regular sleep schedule so I can wake up and go to bed at a regular time and be a better person."
"Do more sports".
How is doing sports going to cure endometriosis? There are cells growing somewhere where they shouldn't. It's been linked to estrogen, but honestly, it affects so many women of all shapes, sizes and fitness levels. Sports are neither the cause nor a treatment. On a side note, the best theory on why some women get it was proposed by some American lady. Apparently, I'm having wild sex with demons and that causes endometriosis somehow. Mhm.
Rare liver disease, now on transplant waiting list. 'You should take turmeric. It's yellow and you go yellow. Remember like cures like.'
Specialist told me I just needed to go for more walks. Took me another 4 years to get a fibromyalgia diagnosis then 4 more years after that to get diagnosed with 3 minor heart problems that were just enough to exhaust me doing nothing. I now am on a beta blocker and don't get winded every time I use the stairs. I thought all you fit people were sadistic masochists that enjoyed pain and feeling tired.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.