Searching for a job is among the more taxing practices we live through as a result of capitalism.
It is largely on us as individuals to do the groundwork finding, applying to, interviewing for, and dealing with the personality types that we find while searching for a job. And honestly, not all of them are great.
Interviews can be extremely revealing about workplace culture. No matter how desperate you are for a job, a bad interview can really throw you for a loop. Would you rather be unemployed, or would you rather be miserable in a job?
Here were some of those answers.
Otters Are Predators, Just Watch Zootopia
At an interview for a tech startup, they asked me "If you could be any animal, what would you be?"
I answered "Otter" because you know, fun, active, work well with their hands and cute as f*ck.
They really debated whether or not to hire me because of that answer because, and I quote, "We only hire predators, never prey." and they weren't sure how to quantify an Otter, because none of them had ever paid the least bit of attention to any sort of animal documentary or read biology or you know, visited a zoo recently.
God that job sucked hard.
But That's The Right Answer....
Was invited for an IT "helper" position when I was 17. Would help fix computers for people at a shoddy PC fix shop.
They asked me "Whats the first thing you check if a customer calls and says their screen doesn't turn on?"
I said "Well, you gotta check if they have it plugged into a socket"
They laughed and said thank you that will be it. Then led me to the door and gently pushed me out.
Ah Yes, Engineer AND Janitor
Job was for a vibration analysis engineer. I knew how to do the job well.
I knew the pay should be around 95k, and they stated 55k (in the interview).
When I tried to discuss my point, they said, "don't worry, there's plenty of overtime".
They also mentioned since they weren't involved with many balancings at the moment, I would assist the cleaning crew with a lot of the cleanings. I've never been so uninterested in a job in my life.
Snitches Get Stitches!
Five interview rounds with the last interview round being with the CEO all for an entry level customer service job. During the last interview, the CEO said you weren't allowed to get sick, and you weren't allowed to leave at the end of the day until all of the work had been done.
So even though the job was 8-4 the CEO said customer service reps often stayed until 6 PM or later.
She also asked if I would be comfortable secretly reporting to her about what the customer service team is up to. I declined the job offer and the company harassed me with emails asking why and what they did wrong. Really glad I didn't take the job.
Money Troubles?Make It Rain Money GIF Giphy
An agency sent me for an interview and said "the starting salary is £33000".
The interview went fairly well until the interviewer said "so what sort of salary are you looking for?" So using the info I had from the agency I said. "Well, I think £33000 is a fair starting point"
....the interviewer practically threw me out! He started to shout about wasting his time because I expected to be paid a huge salary and who did I think I was... he was paying £20,000..............
I'll See Myself Out
Yeah I have one that sticks out. I applied to a government branch as a network admin. The newspaper ad asked for a bachelors degree. They called me into the interview. When I got there, the first thing the interviewer said was, "We wanted someone with a masters degree. Why did you apply?"
Now, I wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they had other interviews that day and got them mixed up. Sh*t happens. I just informed the interviewer that the ad I applied for requested a bachelors degree, and confirmed the position I was interviewing for.
"No, we definitely wanted someone with a master's degree. So, again, why did you apply?"
"If you wanted someone with a master's degree, why did you bother calling me in for an interview?"
"You're very rude and unprofessional."
Yeah, you f*cked up at every junction thus far, but I'm the one who's rude and unprofessional.
Weird All Over
I had one for a job that was a little below my pay grade and far outside of where I wanted to work, but times were tough and I was taking all interviews. I go in and the guy asks me, "on a scale of 1-10, how excited would you be to work here?"
I said "9" because I mean what else was I supposed to say, and he says "oh really?? Why so high??"
I had to come up with some answer that wasn't just I need to pay rent so I think I said I was just really excited to work for a small company like this. The guy replied "huh" and didn't say anything.
Later they called me and said they would only hire me if I started the next day (as far as I know it was an above board, salaried secretary type position). I explained that would need a few days (was moving to an adjacent area) and he said "then never mind don't bother" even though I explained I would probably need 2 days instead of one.
Let's Reiterate Why We Hate You
The first question they asked was a statistics exam-type question. Took me completely off guard. I half-a**ed the answer - a complete answer would have taken half an hour.
The next question was about a Latin Square analysis. I answered honestly, and said that the first thing I would do would be to look it up.
Errors in Latin Squares are incredibly common, and I wouldn't trust anyone who said they could do it off the top of their head. I'd look it up even if I'd done one last week.
They REALLY didn't like that answer.
They wanted to know where my husband worked and where we lived, and they concluded that our 6-month rental location was completely incompatible with the commute to their location.
The whole thing was just super weird - it was like they sat down determined to find a reason they should not hire me. I was relieved to get out of there.
An Hour Just For A CrySad Cry GIF by Team Coco Giphy
I drove an hour away to an interview at 8:00 am. I waited outside the interviewer's office until 8:30 am with no one to tell me where to go or where she was.
Finally, another employee walks by and I ask if they know where this woman is to interview me. They had no idea where she was, why she was late, and told me if she wasn't there yet, I should leave because she probably forgot (...ok?).
I decide 45 minutes is the cut off (especially standing in a government building looking like a creep waiting. 8:45 on the dot she rushes in, flustered, wet hair, and in casual yoga pants.
With all the resurgence of patience I could muster, I greeted her and was met with a passive aggressive scolding of how the interview was at 9, not 8. (Uh... I tripled checked the email asking me to interview and it was 8. We had conducted a phone interview and she followed up with an email request to an in person interview at 8. I was 100% positive on this, I hate being late.)
Even with this, and i did say, "I'm certain you said 8 am, maam" she wasn't having it. Conversely, she also went on about why she was late, surmounting in, she went to the gym and forgot her underwear to change into and had to stop at a store and buy new ones after working out, before coming to work.
She told me this. In the first 5 minutes. Why? I didn't ask her!
Regardless, she looks at my resume, apparently for the first time, because she proceeds to tell me how it is unimpressive and my graduate studies should have yielded numerous publications after 1.5 years. (In my field, most don't publish until after 3-4 years.)
Even still, she kept saying how I had "moved up the interview time", showed me the work spaces and told me I "probably wouldn't be interested in what they do there". I politely told her I had driven, at her request, to be there and interview for employment, I was VERY interested. She waved me off.
As we left, I just tried to hold it together (I was very poor and very desperate for a job), thanked her, and she told me how great it is to work for the government, how good the benefits, the pension, the time off are. On and on. She said, "If you can find an opening working for the government, you should try to check it out and get hired on!"
I just looked her in the face and said, "Yes, ma'am, that was my hope with today's interview. Thank you."
And sat in my car and bawled the whole drive home like the desperate loser I was.
That was a low one, to be sure.
Yeah Gonna Sit This One Out
As a nanny you get some of the weirdest job interviews. It's not a professional HR rep. It's Lisa, who married her college boyfriend and works for her rich Daddy. Most were a just a little awkward with some inappropriate questions. Like, "do you have a boyfriend" or "do you plan on having kids soon?".
One definitely stands out.
I go to an interview for a family of an 16 month old. Mom introduces herself and tells me we'll be interviewing in the nursery. I follow her in and there's only one chair, the rocking chair. She tells me to sit on the ground in a not-so-nice way. It became very clear that it was symbolic for how she treats the "help". She wanted to literally look down on me.
I sit down and she gets her toddler out of the crib. Sits in the rocking chair and immediately starts breastfeeding. Ive been around a lot of breastfeeding mamas so it wasn't that weird. But she took her top off, so she was pretty open about it.
First thing she says "I hope you're ok with this because you'll be seeing a lot it".
No real hello, how's it going? Or a question. Just, "get used to seeing my tits". Then she tells me we'll be conducting the interview when she's done nursing.
So for the next 15 minutes I'm just staring at her breastfeeding.
Already super weird.
The interview finally starts and it goes well. She's clearly a rich spoiled girl. Asks a million questions which is cool. Including a couple weird ones.
When she's done. I go "can I ask some questions?" Her response is "nope."
Then she's tells me she wants to see how I'll do with the kid. For the next 2 hours I follow her around and do what she tells me. I change diapers, give the kid a bath, fold baby clothes, put the kid down for a nap, even washed breastpump parts. And she's critiquing me on everything!
She sends me on my way eventually. I actually thought I did really bad because she was angry a lot. Whatever because I definitely did not want that job.
A month later I get a phone call saying I've been hired. Starting tomorrow. I laughed out loud.
I had apparently been the best candidate by far. Probably because I just took all her sh*t.
She had even ordered me a work uniform. Which is ridiculous.
I tell her I'm not accepting and she's livid. I got messages for the next 6 months telling me how horrible I am and that I betrayed her. And others telling me I can still take the job.
The interviewer insisted on knowing why I'd left graduate school. Now, I had left graduate school because my advisor died in a car accident and the whole small department was thrown for a loop and no one seemed to know or care what was going to happen to me or my just started research project.
The a**hole interviewer wouldn't even accept "My advisor died suddenly" and dug into the gory details until I was almost in tears (even intimating that I must have had "feelings" for my advisor.)
I couldn't wait to get out of there and in my haste to leave I knocked some solutions off a cart (which had no business being in his office BTW) on my way out. I'd never been so humiliated in my life.
After that, I was sure I'd never get a job in science.
Gas Moneygas gasoline GIF Giphy
I drove 2 hrs for the interview.
Got there and the interviewer was off sick and hadn't told anyone about me coming in.
Got back in my car and drove the 2 hrs home.
Withdrew my name from consideration.
Skills Pay Off
Company was downsizing.
All employees in a specific yet exclusive division were fired and ordered to reapply for their position plus two other jobs in the company. You'd either get one of those jobs or be terminated.
The subsequent interviews were conducted with a manager and an HR person.
First interview in executive suite: Manager asks why aren't you applying for this key supervisory slot? (I had listed it second on my list.) Me: I would prefer to stay in my expertise in which I won a National award.
HR: I didn't know awards like that existed.
Second interview: Current boss likes me for my existing job (for which I was heavily recruited from another company).
HR: Wow, so you're the guy who does this job? I had no idea a real person did it.
Third interview: HR person says he's never heard of my division or that employees actually worked at night. I had listed this job in which I merely served as a minor manager as third on my preferences. Really didn't want it but had to list three.
The results: I was retained but transferred to the third dead-end day job. My old award-winning job was given to an aging staffer who never worked in that position or had a clue. The supervisor job went to a brilliant colleague who wanted and deserved it.
I quit very soon thereafter and joined a bigger company with better benefits. Skill pays off.
After all that, my old company, seeing the error of its ways in lost production and general lack of ability, offered me a bonus to return.
Nope, nope, nope. And I'm returning the corporate knife you stuck in my back.
Nothing for You
I drove an hour to be interviewed for a computer repair tech job at a rental company, and 3/4 of the way through the interview they told me I was perfect for the position, however they recently removed the position altogether. They then asked if I'd be willing to repair furniture instead until the position opened again.
In a group interview, the interviewer crossed a line through my name on the list he had after I told him what I graduated in. This was within the first 5 minutes of a 40 minute meeting...
Go to Wendy's
Not that bad, but I remember Taco Bell asked me what type animal I would be if I could be anything. Like wtf do you want me to say? "I would be a fire ant so I could work efficiently with my closest friends!" Sixteen year old me said an eagle, because they're strong and they can fly. Meh.
Not a good time...
When he said I'll give you extra hours if you bring me smokes everyday, then put his hand on my leg and said his wife gives him passes to have fun. I also got a speeding ticket on the way to the interview. Was not my month.
MOVE!!penguin falling GIF Giphy
My first Interview ever was at DQ and I accidentally knocked a 90 year old woman over.
I interviewed for a project management position, the interviewer describes the job: basically it was pure research and data entry of potential clients, then cold-calling them and documenting the results. The job ad mentioned exactly none of this but was an average project management job ad, else I wouldn't have applied in the first place.
I asked what exactly was the project management part, and got told that could (could, not would) be down the road, maybe 2-5 years in, but really only maybe. I thanked them for the interview opportunity, we wrapped things up and I politely left.
Showed up looking good in my suit with a ton of knowledge on Capital Partners.
It turned out I had researched the wrong company named Capital Partners.
Back Up Sweetie
Had a phone interview and the woman kept asking more and more intrusive questions, kept hinting I'm a total piece of crap who's totally unfit for the job (it was the easiest job description ever) and jumping to conclusions about my life that were completely untrue. For example I found out that being a freelancer who gets a lot of decently paid work each month is apparently living off my parents.
She kept going on and on like that for quite a while before I told her to piss off and hung up. Didn't really need that job too badly but it was in a different country so the travel aspect was the main reason. Years later I found out it was a "stress interview" which apparently is a thing. Forget those people.
I'm not the help...Shocked The Nanny GIF Giphy
I went in to apply for an administrative assistant position and the guy kept asking me questions about liking kids and are my passports up to date...etc. I was SO confused. Turns out what he really wanted was a nanny for his two young kids to travel with him and his wife back to India. I was so pissed he wasted my time. I noped right the heck out of there.
As the interviewer: candidate responded to a question I asked with, "is that really how you want to spend our time together, by asking me that question?" when I wrote up my notes I included that bit, it obviously came up in the debrief and a huge red flag.
Other interviewers also had similar, though not as serious, feedback on the candidate. He was not hired.
As the interviewee: interviewer immediately launched into, with a rough accusatory tone: "you're a job hopper, why are you a job hopper?" when I was being recruited for a role a few years ago. I'd been working, successfully, as an independent consultant for7 or 8 years which she equated with 'job hopping'.
I ended that interview pretty quickly with a, "I don't think this is going to be a good fit" and gave the recruiter some pointed feedback - he seemed to acknowledge that she was difficult.
I had an interview with EMC back in the day. I don't remember the specifics other than I was really nervous. I had a "we are sorry to inform you..." email waiting for me before I finished the 10 minute trip home.
So Many Questions
At an interview to be a county street sweeper, guy asks me if I have a girlfriend, proceeds to rant for 5 minutes how young people don't get married anymore. Then he asks me what I want to avoid at the job. At the time I had no idea how to answer as I'd never been asked that in an interview before. So I ask him to clarify, to which he just repeats the question, over and over until he gets super angry that I don't know how to answer that, then asks me to leave. To this day, biggest wtf interview I've had.
I've had an interview where they were looking to replace someone who would retire soon. The issue was, they wanted a super specific skill set, but someone young who could stay for many years.
The position has been advertised for about five years. I wonder if they ever found some 30 year old with 10 years scientific niche experience.
I had an interview and they told me the hiring manager was going on vacation for two weeks after the interviews were done, so a decision wouldn't be made until then. I took a bus home and had a letter from them in the mailbox telling me I was being rejected. It was the afternoon, so they either mailed the letter before they even interviewed me, or the hiring manager raced to my house after the interview to drop the letter off.
I walked in the house and my mom asked how the interview went. I just handed her the letter.
- My face tends to get really red when I'm stressed / embarrassed.
- In a previous job, my company hired a consultant to help some of us improve our presentation skills.
- Consultant gave me some good advice.
- One of the weirder pieces of advice, however, was that if my face got red, I should flex my calf muscles because the flexing would divert blood away from my face and to my legs (I had no idea if that was true or not, but it was weird enough that I remembered it).
- About 10 years later, I'm giving a presentation at a job interview (I'm a scientist and giving a research presentation as part of a job interview is pretty common).
- My research was pretty good, but it had one critical flaw that I wanted to avoid discussing during my presentation.
- Somehow, everyone in the room locked in on the flaw and directed a barrage of critical questions at me.
- I could feel my face starting to get red and all I could do was furiously flex my freaking calf-muscles, which didn't do a damned thing.
I didn't get the job.
Salty ForeverSalty GIF by memecandy Giphy
I was interviewing for a job in Houston, and lived in Austin, about 2.5 hours away. I drove to Houston for the first round of interviews, and they said it went well and wanted to being me in for a final interview, so i drove there again. It seemed like it went well and they told me they had one more interview to conduct and would have a decision tomorrow. So the next day came and went, I emailed the manager to ask if any decision had been made, nothing, waited a couple more days, left a voicemail, nothing.
Then a couple days later, I just called the main number for the company and told the receptionist why I was calling. She was like "well, someone just started in that job yesterday." They ghosted me after I drove a total of 10 hours to interview twice. Still salty about that 11 years later.
Reese's for Me Please
Interviewer, putting candy bars on the table to open the interview: Have a candy bar. Do you want Hershey's or Snickers?
Me: Neither, thanks.
I: Go ahead, pick one.
M: I don't want any candy now, thanks.
I: Take one, Hershey's or Snickers.
M: Okay, I'll take the Snickers.
I: No, I want the Snickers. You take the Hershey's.
M: No, thank you.
I'm staying home...
I interviewed for what was my dream job--something that I have a ton of experience in and two degrees (including one from literally the most prestigious school in my field). They liked me so much on my first few rounds of interviews that they asked me to fly across the country for the final one.
So I go through easily the worst travel day of my life, arrive for my interview, and the interviewer takes one look at my resume and says "I don't know why you came all the way out here, you aren't qualified for this."
Suffice to say I will never work there.
All at Once
I got invited to a "group interview." I thought it meant that a group of people would interview me, which is fairly common. I showed up and there were about ten other kids there. We all went into a conference room and they interviewed us all at once. They asked a question and everyone took turns answering. They switched up who went first each time, and one kid completely froze when it was his turn, so we all had to sit there in the most uncomfortable silence.
She said employees got marked down one point if they came in late to work, even in a blizzard. She said it was their responsibility to check the weather the day before and prepare accordingly. Some of their employees commuted from 100 miles away, so they didn't cut anybody any slack.
Usually I send a follow-up email saying thanks for the interview, I'm interested in the job, bla bla bla. But I didn't send an email that time.
Story from a former colleague. He was interviewing for a position with a local company that had a branch location in another city. He passed his tech screen, so they went for the "in person" part, which involved flying him out and staying the night. When he arrived at the office for the interview, a receptionist led him into a conference room and dialed into a bridge on a speakerphone. After 5 minutes of waiting for his interviewer to join, the receptionist had to call the guy on his cell to remind him of the appointment.
He finally joined and basically "phoned it in" (pun intended), as if he had no interest in filling the position, much less getting to know the candidate. The call lasted maybe 15 minutes. Needless to say, he didn't get the job. He later found out that the interviewer was actually back in our home city. So he flew 3+ hours each way and stayed overnight for absolutely nothing.
Had an interview, went well. I was offering the job on the spot and accepted. The HR manager went to get the needed paperwork, came back 10 mins later and said "I must have forgot that we already filled this position. I'm sorry, but we don't have an opening. I could call you if something opens back up". I said no thank you.
It was my best interview. Great rapport with the interviewer. Gave me the job on the spot. It for a transfer to QA at Johnson Control. Came in to work the next day to have the offer rescinded. The job was already given to the plant managers niece and it had only been posted because of company policy. The story is much longer and complicated afterward but it was the first of several times I had been promoted (different companies) and then been told, "Never mind."
Use Spoonsraul julia GIF Giphy
It was one of those door-to-door knife selling companies. Tried to get a second job to earn a little extra cash before going off to college. I left mid interview after being told how important recruitment would be to my job. It was a group interview too.
How about buying me lunch?
I left work on a long lunch to interview because they flat out refused to interview me at a time I was not at work. Sounds somewhat reasonable, but I had occasional weekdays off (2-4 per month). There was also a convoluted process for "validating my parking" which I did.
I showed up a bit early, waited about 40 minutes for someone I was told definitely was in, and apparently she was just eating lunch or something because on my way back to work I got a call from her asking where I was. She tried to reschedule. Stressful enough the first time; I'm not going to jump through hoops if you don't value me as a prospect enough to keep your own damn appointment.
You're a Mess
Many years ago I was interviewed for an IT Director position at a finance and legal consulting firm. Apparently, they were expecting an older-looking person and assumed I was there for the temp/admin positions. I was given a reading comprehension test, a typing test, and a spatial awareness / IQ test. These took a bit over an hour in total. When I was done the guy said "OK, thanks we'll call you."
I asked about speaking to the CIO and other tech directors for the IT Director position. He looked at me like I had three heads. They kept me waiting for about 25 more minutes, realizing the mistake, scrambling to pull things together. After 45 min of waiting, I told them I was going to leave. The headhunter called me right away really upset that their mistake may cost her a commission on finding me and wasting my time.
We had a very nice discussion about how she needed to screen/brief her clients better, and how they made several bad assumptions that could be an HR issue, within the HR dept. of the consulting firm. I never worked with her again. No idea if they ever found a new IT Director. I feel like I dodged a bullet in a potentially disorganized/toxic workplace. I did learn that at the time I was typing 80+ wpm mistake-free.
Video chat interview: red flag #1 the interview was with 10 interviewers (I was told it would be 1-on-1).
Red flag #2: towards the end they asked if I had any questions. When I asked: "Do you all enjoy working here?" they all looked at each other nervously for about 20 seconds until someone said: "Sure. I mean, as much as you can enjoy work, I guess."
Run Fastwill smith run GIF Giphy
Had an interview at an office supply store once. Guy told me straight up it was a high-pressure sales quota job. They're prices on computers and peripherals were sh!t and that's what I'd be selling.
Dude straight up said it's a lot of work for low pay, not a lot of people enjoy working there, and he finished off with the fact that he's been there for 18 years. Practically ran out of that interview screaming.
All Wrong Questions
I had an interview where I did so poorly, the interviewer wrote it up and submitted it to thedailywtf.com. It's too embarrassing to link to, plus I would prefer to remain anonymous.
It was really just a miscommunication. The interviewer presented a hypothetical problem, and I gave him a perfectly reasonable solution to the problem.
But he kept coming up with reasons why he wouldn't accept my solutions, and my answers got more and more ridiculous, until they didn't make any sense at all. I was just hoping he would drop it and move on to the next question, but he actually took my answers seriously and made me look like a complete fool.
Anyway, I learned some things from that experience.
Y'all got problems...
I had a skype interview with a private practice and the lady interviewing me literally made it sound like a stern military parent.
"You can NEVER be late" (mind you the job was an hour away)
"Even if you have a cold you can NEVER call in sick" (idk if this was meant for pre or post-covid)
"We're a small company so you won't have much of a work/life balance"
"PS our pay for all this dedication is only 3 dollars more than the measly pay your getting now"
Just a whole interview of Red Flags. And the last one was when the lady messaged me immediately after saying I got the job and had to leave my job at maximum, five days' notice, regardless of me kind of bombing the interview and claiming there were other interviewees in line. I could see why they were having trouble hiring people tbh.
Started as the worst, and ended as the best. The beginning started like this: "I'm so sorry to have to inform you of this, but we pulled the wrong resumé contact information, we didn't mean to call you in for an interview." Before leaving, the interviewer gave me a brief tour of the company grounds (because they felt so bad for wasting my time). They introduced me to the department head that I would have been working for, (if that department was actually hiring).
Had a great conversation and the department head was convinced that I would be an asset to them, and they hired me on the spot.
Edit: Just wanted to add (since this got way more attention than I thought) that I have been with this company for over 8 years now, and they are an awesome bunch of people. It was a very unlucky/lucky day for me!
I'll... Do?Say What Excuse Me GIF by Election 2020 Giphy
It was my first "professional" law firm interview. I was SO nervous. I had applied for a legal secretary position.
The attorney whose name was on the door would be interviewing me so I was a nervous wreck. When he walked in the room, I stood up, introduced myself and shook his hand. He looked me up and down and said "yeah, you'll do."
I turned around and walked out without saying another word.
Sorry I'm Flawed
1- the recruiter started to fold my cv into a paper plane during the interview. (Didn't get the job)
2- was pawned off unsuspectingly to the CFO of a company five mins into my interview with the CEO. The CFO had no idea what to ask so he went the "tell me your biggest flaws" way. I was so dejected that I said "you'll have to hire me to find out." Interview ended five mins later. I spent 30 mins crying at my hubris and stupidity in the parking lot. Got the job.
Let's do a hypothetical...
I applied for an internship at a human rights law office. They gave me questions on the spot to debate with them, like 'is bribery acceptable if it's for a good cause'.
It was me versus a panel of 5 senior human rights lawyers for a whole hour, who just ripped me apart from start to finish. Everything I said, they made sound like the dumbest response with their rebuttals.
By the end I was a nervous babbling wreck. Did not get the internship, but did appreciate the experience in retrospect.
When they got back to me, they told me 'your CV (resume) was fantastic, so we were quite disappointed with how poor your interview was.' Burn.
In the Beginning...
As the Interviewee: I told them I hated sales people when they asked why I'd left my last job, which exposed two things about me: I hadn't looked up the company I was interviewing with and that their primary line of business was sales. The mood got chilly real fast after that. Did not get the job.
As the Interviewer: Had a guy ask if it was okay if he went to the restroom real fast and then never came back. His recruiter, who had come with him, was super embarrassed by the whole thing.
Honestly, he was a young kid who'd just graduated, and while he was getting some of the more in depth technical questions wrong he definitely was asking the right questions in return, so we probably would have brought him on entry level. I think he was experiencing a case of imposter syndrome since we were asking him things he didn't know so he panicked.
Hope he received some coaching on how to handle that.
Not horrible...I will just always remember it.
Interviewer: Has a previous employer ever asked you to do anything illegal? (smug look on his face thinking I would be flustered)
Me: Yes, they asked me to take a copyrighted image and "tweek" it so we wouldn't get caught.
Interviewer: Wow...what did you do?
Me: I said no, and am now trying to determine if YOU are going to ask me to do something illegal in this prospective job.
He spent the next 20 minutes apologizing and swearing he just thought it was a fun interview question.
When not to Toot...
I told them I couldn't answer their questions, farted audibly out of stress and thanked them for their time.
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Parenting is a lifelong commitment.
My mother still marvels at how fast I grew up, and I know she was very much taken aback by the (first) time I moved out. I was 20 then and honestly, she would have been fine if I'd stayed indefinitely. Did she ever think, watching me take my first steps, that the years would fly by and that one day she'd be helping me move across the country? I'm sure she did. But that doesn't mean she was entirely prepared.
After Redditor amberarmy1912 asked the online community, "Parents, what surprised you the most when your child moved out?" people shared their stories.
"Or just grabbing something..."<p>That's hard.</p><p>One thing is how much I do miss my kids. I enjoy them not being here (even more once the last one moves out and my MIL is gone) but I miss the f*** out of them. I was so tired of living in one room (the master bedroom was also my office and I work from home) and I enjoy the extra room, but I hate not stopping by and joking around when I see something weird or funny online. Or just grabbing something I know they like when I am at the store and just kind of dropping it by their room as I go past. All those little things are gone now. I hope they realize how much those little things really meant.</p><p>The other is some of my own personal issues. I want to hear from my kids but I don't want to bother them so I don't contact them as often as I would like. I have never been much of a just shoot-the-s*** person so that hurts me in communications. I see a lot of my dad in me that way, he rarely ever calls me except when there is a death in the family or something. I used to not call him when he worked because I could never remember when it was safe to call.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go07ean?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">CrustyBatchofNature</a></p>
"The difference..."<p>The difference between peaceful quiet and sad, lonely quiet.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go0381j?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">factchecker8515</a></p>
My mother told me this...<p>...after I left. It must have been quite the adjustment.</p><p>Let's continue.</p>
"The moment our son moved out..."<p>The moment our son moved out to live on his own he became vegetarian. He never gave us any indication he was planning to or wanted to be vegetarian.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go056ha?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LaoBa</a></p>
"I was cooking recipes..."<p>We have one kid. I was cooking recipes for 6 every night thinking that the portion counts were misleading because we never had any leftovers. Nope. Our grocery bills are now about a third of what they used to be.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go0a4kd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">pro_ajumma</a></p>
That's always nice!<p>Tell me: Who doesn't love saving money?</p><p>Let's continue.</p>
"I also realized..."<p>That we talk more now that he lives on his own. We seriously play games at least twice a week for four to six hours. I also realized I was the safe mom that all his friends felt comfortable with. They still call to talk or stop by for a socially distanced catch-up.</p><p>I also realized that my water bill was only a 1/4 of what it used to be. I wasn't imagining the super long showers.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go020yp?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">backartigain</a></p>
"I found out..."<p>Mom here. I was worried that I would be sad and heartbroken. I found out that was not the case. I was excited to see where her path took her. It's amazing to see her making her own world and dreams come true. I now have more money, so I travel a lot more.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go09zmu?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Mindy76131</a></p>
"I'm sorry, mom." (From a child.)<p>How many kitchen utensils you actually need to make basic meals.</p><p>I'm sorry mom. I will never make fun of your crowded cupboards again.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go07ya4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ersin23</a></p>
This is so true!<p>My kitchen cabinets are so cluttered. In a way, I am thankful. I know I am always prepared in the event I want to make something new. It's a great feeling.</p><p>Let's continue.</p>
"God knows I love them..."<p>It's an instant pay rise. God knows I love them, but even when they have been working and contributing to the household, me and my wife have still fronted most of the bills and purchases. Going from providing for a family of five to just me and the wife.... let's just say we eat better cuts of meat and our savings accounts have never been healthier.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go0guld?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Iloathewinter</a></p>
"The possibility to spend much more time..."<p>The possibility to spend much more time with my wife, which wasn't a surprise, but to sort of rediscover her as the amazing individual I once fell in love with. I never lost sight of it, but the roles of mother and father took up soo much of our time, so our "we"-time had always been on the back-burner (I know I haven't worded this very clearly, but I hope you get what I mean).</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go0guld?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Iloathewinter</a></p>
"They have their own, thoughtful opinions..."<p>When they move out, they also take a step towards adulthood, which means our relationship also changes for the better. We can take a step away from "parent-child"-relationship to "two people who love and respect each other" and we can talk about many issues much more as equals now. They have their own, thoughtful opinions on many topics, an I love having these discussions because more often than not they'll surprise me with a different perspective, and make me re-think my own opinions.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go0guld?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Iloathewinter</a></p>
"I'm a dad..."<p>The dad identity I adopted isn't who I am.</p><p>I'm a dad, but I used to be more than that and still want to be.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lnb5qd/parents_of_reddit_what_surprised_you_most_when/go09gkr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">wedeservebetter</a></p>
That last one hits me something fierce...<p>...and I'm not even a parent! </p><p>It must be incredibly difficult to accept these kinds of changes after so many years of sacrifice.</p><p>If you'll excuse me, I'll go hug my mom. (Thankfully we've been able to see each other during this pandemic!)</p><p>Have your own stories to share? Feel free to share them in the comments below.</p>
Students who have not prepared for an exam somehow have the energy to devise a plan to cheat.
Ploys<p>These Redditors witnessed answers being relayed to students by an unassuming accomplice.</p><p>While the tactics may have looked good on paper, they failed to fool anyone. <br></p>
Using A "Translator"<p>"At the test center I used to work candidates were allowed to bring a translator of their choice as long as it got approved by the state. Most of the time it was a family member and we would listen in on the conversation using a headset and record it. Once in a while, while replaying the recordings we would hear signals and patterns given by the translator telling the candidate which option to choose. Busted!"</p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/goh177j?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Csuz9022</a><br></p>
Braiding Hair<p>"Not an exam proctor, but a student who heard of this afterwards. It was two girls, and the one who knew the answers sat behind the other. During the test, she started braiding the other girl's hair. When the teacher wasn't looking, the one in the front would make a number with her fingers on the side of her thigh (the question), and the other responded by pulling her hair on specific spots (A, B, C, D)."</p><p>"They made a habit of braiding each other's hair everyday days before the exam so the teacher wouldn't find it weird. I was the goody two shoes who never cheated, but even I had to respect them."</p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/gohx322?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Leticia_the_bookworm</a><br></p>
Notes To Self<p>Some students used their own bodies to scribble down the answers – including on thighs, arms, and even mixed among freckles.</p><p>All that work disguising the answers could have been spent on studying.</p><p>Yet, here we are. <br></p>
Notes On Thighs<p>"I'm not an examiner but my mate once wrote out loads of notes on his thighs then went to the toilet during the exam- the examiner led him to the toilet to check the cubicle out first etc then waited to listen for papers rustling etc. He wasn't very smart but that could well be the smartest idea he's ever come up with. Absolutely do not condone though!"</p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/goguirq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">sophloopyP</a><br></p>
Camouflage With Freckles<p>"I have a lot of freckles on my arm, which would turn lighter if I put pressure on the skin, which gave me an idea. If I used a marker with a similar color as my freckles, I could make dots that formed letters or numbers, and when I pressed my arm just right, the freckles would fade for a second or two, but the ink would remain dark. Couldn't write a lot like this, but enough for notes on more difficult concepts. Never got caught."</p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/gohqb1h?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">FourRosesVII</a><br></p>
Two "BUSTED" Students<p>"Not a proctor but I witnessed two students get caught cheating while we were taking exams."</p><p>"One girl wore cheap/thin leggings that were slightly too tight. When she sat down, they would stretch out further and would basically become see-through over her thighs. She had a bunch of equations written on her thighs that one of the proctors noticed as they walked around the testing room. BUSTED."</p><p>"One guy had a bunch of stuff written on the insides of his arms, near his wrists . He wore a long-sleeved shirt that he would pull up/down. One of the proctors noticed him messing with it across the room and had him pull his sleeves up. BUSTED."</p><p>"Don't cheat, kids. You really don't want to have to explain to future employers or grad schools why you have an academic suspension or worse on your transcript."</p>
Tricks Up My Sleeve<p>Instead of relying on accomplices or their own flesh canvases, the following students devised ingenious ways to cheat. </p><p>One proctor was astonished while watching one particular student who, like a magician, produced slips of paper from "everywhere."</p>
Printing Personalized Labels<p>"I knew a guy who would make his own labels for soda/water bottles, but change the nutrition info to be useful equations for the test. The labels' material was identical to regular ones, even down to the gloss of the paper. Seems like if he spent the time studying, instead of making perfect labels for cheating, he wouldn't need the labels in the first place." </p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/goi5cta?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Helldiver-xzoen</a><br></p>
So 2020<p>"My friend came up with the realization that you can slip a paper into your mask and then pull it to see what you wrote."</p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/gogvb4u?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Disposable_baka404</a><br></p>
The Pen<p>"In high school, circa 1996, I somehow obtained the answers to a 20 question test. I proceeded to go to the computer lab and type the answers and then printed them in size 3 font. Then I cut them out and taped them on one side of a white Bic pen. During the test I could roll the pen so the answers weren't visible, and then when I need to look I could tilt the pen slightly and see the answer. I missed two on purpose so the teacher wouldn't figure I cheated."</p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/gohmm4p?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Flip17</a><br></p>
So Many Slips Of Paper<p>"Guy came in to sit an exam (along with one or two dozen others), wearing an eyepatch and with one arm in a sling with a prosthetic hand. Pretty unusual, but whatever. But I got suspicious when he started fiddling with his eyepatch, pulling it way away from his face and then putting it back. So I pressed the button on my desk that turns the cameras on (not sure why they didn't just record all the time, but this was back in the mid-eighties). I wasn't actually supposed to intervene in these cases, so I just sat there and watched, astounded, as this guy proceeded to pull little slips of paper from all over the place -- the sleeve of his supposedly injured arm, <em>under his tongue</em>... incredible. I don't know how he fooled himself into thinking nobody would notice."</p><p>– <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lqkhsq/exam_proctors_of_reddit_what_is_the_most/goiemw8?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">super_aardvark</a><br></p>
Sometimes the things that come out of peoples' mouths are truly astounding. It makes you wonder, where did things go wrong? Why are they like this? As Forrest Gump once said, “stupid is as stupid does".
Here are a few of the most jaw-dropping lay stupid things that have been said by actual human beings. Not aliens trying to figure out how humans communicate--ACTUAL human beings. Thanks, Reddit.
First up, what better people to hear ridiculous claims from than children? Here are some people that even teachers couldn’t help.
Well, that’s awkward.
I was in 5th grade like 20 years ago, and I am a male which is important later. My school changed an extra girls locker room into a computer lab. When my class got to go check it out, I say "wow, it looks so different!".
Everyone looks at me like I'm a creep. What I meant to say was "wow it looks so different that the boys locker room!" I still think about this when trying to fall asleep more often than I'm comfortable with.
....no. No it’s not.War Guy GIF Giphy
In my Spanish class where they were talking about Spanish countries
"What about Syria...isn't Syria Spanish?"
Worst part... NOBODY called her out on it to the point I was questioning myself. The professor had good English but it wasn't her first language and she dodged her question saying she's only going over countries in south america. I had to literally write myself a note that she literally asked that question. Then I got paired up with her like 10 minutes later for a group activity and I still wasn't over this question lol
Fake but also real but also demonic?
A kid in high school tried to convince me that men had an extra rib and that the earth is only a few thousand years old. Same kid said that ouija boards were full of magnets and gears which made them fake, yet they were simultaneously completely real and needed to be burned on sight to prevent demonic possession.
But sometimes it’s the parents of children who say the dumb stuff.
Back in 2014 I still vividly remember we were eating dinner, and my brother is chewing with his mouth open while my sister is talking. My dad, still thinking about her talking but talking to my brother said "Talk with your mouth closed." and my sister just went silent immediately.
Stupid can turn into ignorant really quickly. Here are a few examples of the not-so-harmless kind of dumb statements.
Fun fact: they don’t use the US Constitution in New Zealand. Who knew?angela rye guns GIF by Third Rail with OZY Giphy
After the church shooting in New Zealand, they banned guns. My coworker said that they can't do that since it violates the second amendment. We live in California.
Everyone knows New Zealand is the state below New Canada.
Uhhhhh that’s racist af.
Not to me but my husband.
He had to take an uber home from the Naval Base in San Diego (car was getting fixed) and the guy who picked my husband up was from Pakistan and they had small talk, telling him how he moved over here etc, dude was pretty cool.
My dumbass half sister whom we were staying with for a bit told him straight to his face, "Oh since you're military he probably wanted to like... murder you."
...What a f*cking ignorant, racist thing to say.
Just gonna leave this one here....
"And then I see the disinfectant where it knocks it out in a minute. And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside, because you see it gets in the lungs, so it would be interesting to check that out."
Well that’s a new one.
A trans friend got "You're registered as a man here, so I need to hear a male voice to complete the verification of your acount."
Not the first time the cable company pulled this 'female' account 'female' voice / 'male' account 'male' voice crap. But that one time was on a whole other level.
But most of the time, dumb statements are harmless, and make for a good story down the line.
I wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face either.alvin and the chipmunks GIF by 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment Giphy
A few questions I've heard come to mind, I'm not sure which is the best/worst.
A few years ago my mom, in her 60s at the time, asked me if chipmunks grow up to be squirrels. Have you ever tried to keep a straight face while explaining to the grown-ass woman who was responsible for keeping you alive for ~18 years that chipmunks and squirrels are different animals?
In high school during a Spanish class as student asked "Do Spanish-speaking people think in Spanish?" After being told yes, her follow-up question was "Are they born speaking Spanish?" The teacher kept a straight face explaining that foreign language speakers learn their language the same as the student learned English, but there were a lot of other students laughing and brutally mocking her.
Ah yes, the two types of guitars.
Dumbest thing I ever asked was, "do you prefer playing electric or air guitar?" I really meant to say acoustic, like my dad's.
Air guitar. I don't know how to play the acoustic or electric guitars, but I never get a wrong note on the air guitar.
Did you change your birthday?
At the bank.
Teller: Is your phone number still 123-4567?
T: Is your address still 123 Easy st?
T: Is your birthday still 01/01/2000?
M: laughing I sure as hell hope so
I can't even make fun of these. One time I asked my husband where the Newport Ferry sailed to.
I think we all have slip-ups in our brains sometimes. It's part of being human, and hey, they stay alive as inside jokes for generations to come
If you want to be ready when an emergency strikes--or isn't far away--it's so important to have a developed foundation of preparedness.
In the midst of a sudden crisis, blood pumping and heart racing, devising what to do out of the blue is just about impossible.
But if you've studied ahead of time, and even practiced if you're really good, you won't have to devise anything. You'll just act. And you'll act correctly.