Define "Upper Class."
Everyone wants to be it, but who can really say what defines it?
Money can't buy class, we know that thanks to celebrity and all the Real Housewives.
But so many people believe they belong to this sacred group of privilege.
So let's figure out how we all get there.
Redditor rethinkwhatisthere wanted to discuss just what exactly are the benchmarks to becoming society's best by asking:
"What screams 'I am upper class'?"
GROSS EXCESS.
I do a lot of cable and fiber-optic work in an extremely affluent neighborhood in the FL panhandle, called Alys Beach. I'm talking GROSS excess when it comes to these houses. But the look on their face when I call their multi-million dollar villa a "townhouse," is priceless.
GiphyI Aspire.
Honestly I don't know, I do security for upper class neighborhoods and condos and its the upper middle class people that absolutely do the crazy things for status. There was a guy who didn't have a barcode, so he came through the visitors lane everyday. He had a messy car, greasy hair, wore holey t-shirts. He was the nicest guy, but he did seem out of place. One day he was upset people were talking sh!t about him and I let him vent and he appreciated that. He came in the next day so happy and was like "Remember that b!tch I was talking about yesterday? Well l, I bought her business! Who's laughing now!"
So he was I can buy your business out of pettiness rich, which is what I aspire to be.
Rumor has it.....
Knew a rich kid in college. Rumor has it, dude ended up owing hundreds of thousands of dollars to bookies for betting on NBA games. For that amount of money, the syndicates financing the bookies in my country go after you and your family to make sure you pay.
Night before pay day, dude went to his parents allegedly crying, telling them he had a problem. Parents were obviously concerned. Dude told them what happened and parents breathed a sigh of relief.
They thought he got a chick pregnant. They gave him the money to pay the bookie, relieved.
Swim Deep.
I taught swim lessons at a pretty expensive summer camp, where parents paid upwards of $200 per day for kids, and around $350/day for tweens. Swimming, hiking, paddle boards, rock climbing, horses, etc.. nothing too special these kids couldn't find at another camp. Lots of celebrity kiddos though.
I would charge $50/hr to guard private pool parties because I didn't want to work weekends and didn't really like guarding as much as I loved teaching, but these parents didn't care. I once made $400 in an afternoon guarding a pool that nobody swam in and $100 tip because the dad felt sorry for "wasting" my time. $500 to eat catered Kogi Korean bbq truck food and chat about cars for a few hours; no complaints.
It felt like I was just on display for the parents to show that they could afford a guard. I miss it sometimes.. I was dumb with the money and didn't save much, but enough for some tattoos, a flat screen, and to put 35% down on my first car.
Transport Issues.
Frequency of travels. I work around a ton of upper class people and many of them travel so much they are practically locals at some restaurants. They also focus on lesser known, yet elaborate spots.
The Steinway....
A wealthy couple I know has twin Steinway concert grand pianos in their ballroom-sized living room.
Neither of them plays a note on these elegant pianos that are worth about $185,000 each (Steinway model "D" - 9').
So they hire me to play for special occasions. In the interim, the 2 grands just sit there as part of the room's décor.
Having a nanny 100%.....
Having a nanny 100%. Taught at a dance school in a wealthier area. Not only did all the kids attend a private school but their nannies would be the ones dropping them off. Being that i am not upper class my first few weeks I was pretty confused as to why so many white children seemed to be adopted by asians. Than when I finally met the parents of one of my students i realized they were ALL Vietnamese nannies.
So Quaint.
My friend's parents have a lot of money and I went to a Halloween party that his family friends were having a couple years ago. I distinctively remember hearing the following two sentences (both travel related):
- "We only have five trips booked next year so we're going to try to sneak in a little visit to Egypt in April."
- "Yeah, we were just offered another expenses paid trip to St. Lucia but we turned it down. It just gets boring when you've been so many times."
To the second one, I said "I had to downgrade to one-ply toilet paper this month. Can I have the trip?" They all laughed at my "quaintness."
Add it up...
Being enormously more concerned about how long something will take to get done, rather than how much it will cost.
While we may not have nailed down what upper class is, it seems like classy isn't necessarily part of it.
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Redditor xefarar565 was curious to hear the things people still can't quite get over, leading them to ask:
"What are you STILL salty about?
When The Teacher Was Wrong
"In a 5th grade science test the question was, 'are there any stars in the solar system'."
"I answered, 'yes'.
"Teacher marked it wrong."
"I went up afterwards and said, 'What about the Sun?'"
"He said, he meant that all the other stars are not in our solar system and kept it marked wrong."
"Although I am harboring this for 50 years now, he was all-around one of the best teachers I ever had and just passed away a week or so ago."
"But damn, that should have been marked 'right'."- tres_chill
"On a fourth grade math test we had to make a shape that had only four sides, one set of parallel lines, and only ONE right angle."
"There were probably more requirements but I cant remember."
"I remember almost crying at my desk and spending 20 minutes on that one question while constantly telling my teacher that it wasn't possible but according to her it was."
"And the next day we went over the answer key, and the answer had two right angles."- Gloomy_CowPlant·
"In fourth grade English class (EU) I've used the word 'gross' in a random sentence we had to write."
"The teacher argued that it isn't a real word, I said that it is, that I saw it a few times in video games and movies and she said that they aren't a reliable source."
"I said to her that I'm gonna show it in the dictionary, but she instead grabbed me by the arm and took me out of the classroom and locked the door."
"To this day I am still fuming about this."
"And then she had the nerve to be all chummy when I met her once in a supermarket."
"Gross."
"In both cases it was meant like 'disgusting' and I know there are even more meanings behind the word."
"I wonder if she knows by now."- kuroishi_x
Season 8 Teacher GIF by FriendsGiphyFalsely Convicted
"When I was in high school someone tagged up the school."
"They announced there would be a reward for anyone who rats anyone out."
"I get called in the office and find out I’m suspended for vandalization."
"I didn’t do it and had no idea who."
"4 days later I’m allowed to come back to school because they found who actually did it."
"I just got an apology."- Imlouwhoareyou
When Nobody Believes You
"Me and some others in primary school were saying the biggest numbers we knew of."
"Everybody was saying like 100 thousand and a million and then I'm like 'a trillion'."
"And they refused to believe it was a real number."- Jhyanisawesome
When Parents Don't Believe You
"When I was in high school, I was occasionally allowed to drive my family's third car."
"It had a slow leak in one of the tires, so we were all supposed to check the pressure and put air in it if we needed to."
"I picked up a friend to go to a movie, and when we came out one tire was completely flat."
"It wasn't the one with the leak, so I put the spare on and drove home."
scolding in trouble GIF by Archie ComicsGiphy"I got absolute hell from my parents about it."
"How irresponsible I was to not check it, I'd have to pay for the repair, why didn't I call roadside assistance, etc."
"Took it to get fixed, repeat the whole lecture as we're dropping it off, and the tech who did it called my mom and told her he'd found a nail in the tire and there was no way I could have seen it coming."
"She refused to apologize and I still had to pay for it."- EradiKate
Huge Fee For A Crappy Job
"Being charged $1000 for a battery an alternator change."
"They also destroyed my starter motor in the process and rounded a bunch of my bolts."
"They left tools in the engine bay."
"I don't even have that car anymore and I'm still salty."
"F*ck you Midas!"- funkyjiveturkey
Undervalued At Work
"3 months ago I went on maternity leave."
"The woman hired to cover for me was being paid 3 dollars more than I'm currently paid."
"She was going to be kept on as a full time accounting assistant after I returned, but she couldn't keep up with my daily tasks and completely fucked up several databases that I had to correct when I returned to work the following month."
"When I asked for a raise, they offered me .50 after telling me how crucial I am to the structure of the company."
"Needless to say, I'm looking for a new job."- chumbokosh
Season 3 Nbc GIF by The OfficeGiphyIt sometimes feels like it's impossible to get a bitter taste out of our mouth.
That's when we remember how in every recipe, you'll likely need a little bitterness to offset the sweet, salty and sour.
So, rather than stew in our anger and resentment, maybe take a minute to really think about how we somehow grew from these otherwise awful situations.
Redditor Substantial-Young-85 asked:
"What will die with millennials?"
Remember when cars were driven by people?
That's going the way of the horse and buggy.
To Walls
"I once tried to explain the my niece that phones used to be wired to walls. She's ten (she was six at the time) cell phones are all she's ever known. Among the reasons she guessed as to why they were 'tied' to walls: To stop people from stealing them."
N_Who
Phone Call Dancing GIF by Crissy ConnerGiphyWithout WHAT?!
"Memory of life without internet."
RagingDinoZ
"When I was a kid, we didn't have the internet."
Aido_Playdoh
"I remember asking our son one time if he knew how much tablet time I git when I was a kid (he was complaining that he was t getting enough). He guessed 2 hours. I told him 0, because the internet, let alone tablets, weren't really a thing yet. He looks confused and mystified."
TheHrethgir
Looked it Up?
"Remembering someone’s phone number."
Misttertee_27
"Still have my 3 best friends numbers memorized, when I haven't needed to use that info for 15+ years, as well as most of my family. Intentionally memorized my boyfriend's in case there's an emergency and I don't have my phone."
Particular-Payment59
"I know my parents' home number and a few friends from high school's telephone numbers. I do not know my wife's telephone number and when I do need it I always look it up on my phone."
-Handsome-Jim-
Music Tales
"Dubbing cassettes and burning your own mix on CD."
pfc_Frank
"Ahhhh, waiting by the radio for an hour for them to play your favorite song. You push record at just the right moment. Song plays! Only for the DJ to talk over the last 30 seconds. Sigh. Memories."
zenOFiniquity8
"Or somewhere yells into the basement or your room. Followed by “I AM TRYING TO RECORD A TAPE!"
kperalta87
Control+Save
"3.5 inch floppy discs."
Traylor_Swift
"I have a sealed 5 pack box of those in my room, wonder how much they are worth nowadays."
TrueF0xtr0t
GiphyFloppy what? Even I barely remember those. LOL.
Options
"Watching 'whatever was on.' Everything is always on now, you don’t stumble into an interesting (or awful) show because it’s the only thing mildly interesting on TV."
ChefJeff7777777
television fashion GIF by DenyseGiphy"that's not right surely"
"A coworker and I were talking a while ago and we started thinking/ talking about how the general population (not the ones going to school for it or people truly interested) most younger and older people don't understand a lot about computers. If it's not app, most people aren't really sure how to get to it on a computer."
"I thought, 'that's not right surely' but when trying to get a younger coworker (different dept) to add a printer he literally asked me "wheres the app I can't find it to add the printer" and I just like stared into the middle distance for a sec before just doing it for him. It was like navigating a computer wasn't something he'd done in his life."
"And he's only like 4 years younger than me. He's glued to a cell phone too so I was like yeah ok this guy should know. Nope. This is only one example though. However, when I really stop and think about it, the window from late 80s-00s were really the testing phase for home computers and most to all websites. So navigating them, learning basic code (OG, Myspace people)."
"And just figuring out computer language (not code just the terms) for normal people... really ended when cell phones became more popular. But it feels weird to have to explain stuff to someone younger than me while simultaneously doing the same thing when they are older. It's kinda frustrating tbh but mostly just mind boggling."
TheBohoChocobo
Split
"Playing multi-player video games with split screens in one room."
EngineerMinded
"Eeehh split screens will probably be a thing forever I mean if Nintendo is still strong and going in the 2080s then we will still have Mario Party."
Kiro_sage
"We used to do LAN parties. You could hook up to 4 Xboxes to each other any play a couple of people on each one. It was great. Cords running everywhere, but 4 Xboxes running at once mad for some fun times. You'd constantly be yelling back and forth between rooms and mom would lose it."
Odd_Description1
Travel Finndings
"Knowledge of pre-digital life. An appreciation for sending and receiving letters in the mail. As Arcade Fire put it, we used to wait. Memory of the USA pre 9/11. Using maps and Thomas Guides for road trips. Guys, I’m so old I remember the first time my dad used MapQuest to print out directions for a cross country trip, and how novel it seemed at the time."
MovieGuyMike
Manuals
"Apparently using a Haynes or a Chilton’s manual to work on your car. I hate using YouTube videos for car maintenance, but it looks like that’s all I have left."
RandomGovtEmployee
confused season 2 GIF by Blunt TalkGiphyI'm feeling a bit nostalgic. Oh the memories...
Redditor Aden_Elvis77 asked:
"What is something that most people won’t believe, but is actually true?"
I am not a "knowing extra facts person," so I'm here to be schooled.
Layers
"Think of an apple as the Earth. Human beings have never dug past the skin layer."
SithLard
"Think PF balloon filled with water. Just imagine the water is molten lava."
ffsudjat
Silence Of The Lambs Skin GIF by Death Wish CoffeeGiphySaviors...
"Humpback whales will turn on their back and let seals jump on their stomachs to save them from orcas because they freaking hate orcas."
"Edit: Just because this got attention, here are some fun sources..."
"Here are some photos of a Humpback saving a seal"
"Humpbacks attempting to save a calf from being drowned by Orcas"
"An incredibly well done Radiolab episode explaining the relationships between Orcas and Humpbacks"
chinabot1
Age is only a #
"The guy who played the villain in Karate kid 3 (Terry Silver , Thomas Ian Griffith) is actually 7 months younger than Ralph Macchio, (Daniel LaRusso). It’s weird because the karate kid was still supposed to be under 18 and the villain was supposed to have fought in Vietnam."
TheRedMarin
"Hollywood age is really weird. Sean Connery was only 12 years older than Harrison Ford, but played his noticeably older father in Indiana Jones."
JinimyCritic
"He's in the latest couple of seasons of Cobra Kai and I would not have guessed that. Good fact!"
Grimdotdotdot
Pressure
"The average blood pressure of a giraffe is around 300/190. They need to have a high BP to get the blood all the way up the neck to profuse the brain with oxygen. I am thoroughly impressed by their cardiovascular system."
anastasiaanne
"They also have a specific mechanism to not let their brain explode from too much blood pressure when they lower their head to drink. Truly fascinating creatures."
Doc_Plague
Breeding
"Komodo dragons usually reproduce sexually, but females in captivity have been known to reproduce by parthenogenesis, without the need for sperm."
Dusty_Roller
dragon spinner GIFGiphyI really have no interest in anyone or anything's sex life but mine.
Read the label...
"There would be a lot more ancient Egyptian mummies if we didn’t grind most of them up to paint with or… eat."
Faust_8
"Victorians be whack. Mummy brown was a very popular paint pigment for the time, creating a rich brown color that couldn’t easily be replicated, and eating bits of mummies (mixed into other things mind you, it was considered a medicine and not a food) was thought to possibly cure diseases. Probably had 0 scientific backing behind it even back in the day but trendy rich people are trendy rich people no matter the era."
MadameCat
Dance Dancing GIF by Scooby-DooGiphyImportant Dates
"Anne Frank, Martin Luther King, and Barbara Walters were all born in the same year."
Crooooow
"C.S. Lewis and Aldous Huxley died on the same day, but it didn't really make the news because the day was 11/22/1963 and it was also the day JFK was shot."
SerialKillerVibes
"It's wild that Anne Frank or MLK might still be alive today if they hadn't been killed by oppressive right-wing regimes. Makes you wonder what we're missing out on."
BabyYodasDirtyDiaper
Taste Related
"Almonds are from the peach family."
RifleShower
"Cashews, pistachios, and mangos are related to poison ivy. If you are extremely sensitive to poison ivy you may also react to the others. Mango skin can cause the ‘mango mouth’ rash and cashews for example can give you a terribly itchy bu**hole."
howling_greenie
"If done right, marzipan (made from almonds) and persipan (made from peach seeds) almost taste the same."
CaptainThorIronhulk
Over the Water
"The shortest commercial flight in the world lasted 57 seconds. It was a Loganair flight between two Scottish islands, Westray and Papa Westray. It was recorded the shortest commercial flight, with the distance of 1.7 miles."
AnneKellyy
"It’s actually quite necessary. There are too few people living there to build bridges, and the seas are too rough for ferries, so the only real option is to use planes. As for the planes themselves, the ones operating the flight are tiny DHC-6 Twin Otters, which don’t use that much fuel relative to larger airliners."
griffin-meister
Pieces of Rain
"Humans can smell some components of the smell of rain (the geosmin part of petrichor, specifically) far better than sharks can small blood in water. We are very very sensitive to it."
"Edit: thank you all for enjoying this fact I really like reading all your replies and I’m learning even more about this. Now go own people in trivia! Science is awesome! Thank you for the premium/gold whoever did that!"
Ratmatazz
madonna GIFGiphyWell that was entertaining. I knew I loved rain.