Most of us have met people in our lives that just set off instant alarms or gave us the jibblies. Maybe they didn't even do anything, maybe they never even spoke to you.
But something in you just ... knew...
One Reddit user asked:
and yeah, a whole lot of you have moments where you just knew you weren't OK.
A Wedding In SicilyMarlon Brando Wedding GIF by The Godfather Giphy
Staying at an all-inclusive hotel in Sicily, suddenly get our dinner reservation canceled for reasons out of their control, spoke to reception who gave us cash to eat out.. never experienced anything like it, and were so oblivious.
Fast forward to dinner went down to reception to book a taxi, all staff were nowhere to be seen or avoiding us. Turns out the mafia had called for a wedding party, last minute & that's it. So many exotic cars, lots of guns, men in suits.
Even more bizarrely, the family apologized about our dinner reservation & invited us in for drinks.
We actually joined the after of an Italian Mafia wedding. Declining would have been unwise.
"For No Reason"
I worked as an EMT for four years (I didn't quit, now I'm a paramedic).
My partner and I were sent out to an extremely sketchy hotel to pick up a patient for PD. Basically, this guy had been arrested for something was now swearing up and down that he had chest pain to waste the time of as many people as possible. An ambulance crew had to be dispatched to take him to the hospital in restraints, an officer had to sit with him there until he was cleared etc.
When we arrived, he was crying loudly, sitting on the sidewalk between two cops. I took exactly one look at him and I was terrified. I could feel my heart rate jump and my hands start to shake.
My larger male partner said he'd sit in the back with him. So this guy cries the whole time we put him on the gurney and restrain him (if you're arrested or a danger to us, you get soft restraints tying your wrists and ankles to the gurney). He sobs loudly, talking about how much his chest hurts and how he didn't even do anything. My partner at the time, being better than the rest of us, was polite, professional and kind.
The moment the cops were out of sight and he was shut in the back of the ambulance for the ride to the hospital it was like a switch flipped. His face was utterly, perfectly neutral. He stopped making any noise at all. I will never forget the way he looked at my partner. I've read a lot of books talking about a "calculating" gaze but I'd never seen one before.
So a couple of weeks later we find out why he was being arrested: He had flung bleach into the eyes of a cashier for "disrespecting him". She was now permanently blind.
If you're scared of someone for no reason, you're probably not scared of them for no reason.
"May We Never Meet Again"
I got rear ended outside New York City in a brand new car in busy rush hour traffic in 1995 or so. I had recently been in a hit and run so the first thing I did was look in the rear view and write down the plate number.
It was either a black caddy or a town car. The passenger was an older man wearing sunglasses, wearing a fedora and smoking a cigar. The driver was a huge man who could have been a linebacker.
As I was writing down the color/make/model of his car the driver knocked on my window. I got out. He seemed annoyed.
No damage to my car, little to his. He looked at me and said "We are all ok here right?"
I thought better to go along with that. I said we should probably file a police report and exchange information. He said "no, we are ok."
Normally I would have insisted, but I had a pretty good idea of what type I was dealing with. He said "OK, all set then" and I said "ok" and went back to my car and he said "WAIT."
I almost pissed my pants. I turned around and he grabbed my right hand, shook it, looked right into my eyes and said:
"May we never meet again"
I went back into my car and drove off as fast as I could and kept checking my rearview every so often for that car. Never saw it again but shook for a while on my drive to my destination.
I'm lucky I've had limited interaction with people who set my alarms off immediately. The first one that comes to mind was meeting one of my friend's stepdad.
His mom was smart and good looking but was too sensitive and agreeable for her own good and had a tendency to pick guys who were basically defined by their red flags.
First husband was a guy who started out a very handsome dude but eventually did enough meth he lost it.
Second was a guy who loved mma and for a while was pretty fit and made good money at his job. At the same time was also the type of alcoholic to have seizures if he withdrew and would do things like punch holes in doors while drunk.
I met the second. We had almost no interaction, all the stories I knew about him I knew secondhand. He had this way of entering a room, and just immediately making things tense without saying anything.
I remember turning to my buddy and saying:
"Dude... That guy's vibe is DARK."
I never felt anything exactly equivalent to it. He could get up off of the couch, grab a glass of water and sit back down again and the way he'd do it would make me feel like all the air went out of the room.
It didn't hurt he was super stockily built, had a shaved head and perpetually looked pissed off. Just the force with which he would sit down on the couch made me feel like I wanted to avoid eye contact so he wouldn't explode on me for something even though I never talked to him.
But the bulk of the stories didn't come from people who had brief encounters. Most people had extended or repeated exposure to their particular nightmare ... and it was definitely life changing.
"I Thought He Was Just Annoying"kaley cuoco penny GIF by The Paley Center for Media Giphy
I thought he was just annoying.
He was a good friend's neighbor. I had only met him once before. The friend and I went going to take his boat out, dude saw us and invited himself along.
Five minutes after launching, the dude is already working on his second beer and yells a racial slur at two guys fishing.
Later on, we pull up to the beach, some people in a giant boat ask if we can move farther away. They wanted to set up a tent.
Words are exchanged and he yells that he'll kill them. They called the cops and he ran into the woods because he had warrants.
He comes back after the cops leave. My buddy vowed never to let him hang out again.
This proves pretty easy to do. Unfortunately that winter, he got drunk, got into and argument with his 21 year old son and shot him dead.
He Wouldn't Hesitate
I worked in a behavioral management unit in a maximum security prison for a couple years. It's a unit that houses borderline personality cases, sociopaths, psychopaths, et cetera. Basically a small unit to house the most disruptive inmates in the DOC.
We had an inmate who was in prison for burning down a building with a bunch of people in it due to selling his girlfriend some bad drugs. He killed at least one of them I don't remember the particulars.
This inmate was usually polite, courteous, hard working, everything you'd want from an inmate. Hell we'd watch jeopardy most nights and I would be blown away by his ability to answer a massive majority of the answers correctly.
Then suddenly he wouldn't be okay.
The most minor perceived slight or minor transgression would change him. He would shut down and become incredibly violent.. and he was so strong. He looked forward to the violence kind of like what's captured in Bronson movies.
It happened intermittently but when it did he was a force to be reckoned with.
We never had it out, but I was always aware that when I was speaking to him, it wasn't like I wasn't having a normal conversation... it was like he had programmed responses that were designed to be exactly what I wanted to hear.
Then there are the eyes, you hear the saying often inside the walls "nothing behind the eyes"... he was the only one I ever really felt that. His glare felt dangerous, and I can't really compare it to anything I've ever experienced before or since.
He made it through the program... eventually. The carrot that they dangled was a choice of what prison they would like to transfer to. He choose one that had a particular staff member that crossed him too many times years and years back. He was going there to kill them. He waited years for the opportunity.
Luckily he slipped up and someone caught on before he could make it there.
Without a doubt the most dangerous person I have ever meant. There was no doubt in my mind that if he had the opportunity and he felt like he needed to he wouldn't hesitate to kill me. I am so glad he'll never see the streets again.
A friend of my brother's, who cornered me in the kitchen in the middle of the night when we were all hanging out at my sister's place and everyone else was asleep.
I was trying to politely sidle around him to get away, but he kept outmaneuvering me. It was just mildly irritating at first (I was tired and wanted to go to bed) until he finally stood blatantly in the middle of the door and said something to the effect of:
"God, you're so uncomfortable, you keep messing with your hair, you can't even make eye contact with me."
Irritation turned immediately to fear, because he went from "social idiot who can't take a hint" to "predator who knows exactly what he's doing" in a snap. He held that position for just a few seconds, but it felt like hours, until he finally let me go.
I had planned on sleeping on the living room floor (the creep was in the guest bedroom and my brother had passed out on the living room couch), but I was so freaked out went and crawled in bed with my sister. I didn't sleep that night.
They left before I got out of bed the next morning, and the next time I talked to my brother I told him I didn't like his friend. I don't know what the dude said to him, but my brother kind of paused and said:
"... Yeah, he turned out to be kind of a d*ck."
and that was the end of it.
An extremely notorious gang member.
I wondered why bikies had started hanging around the apartments I lived in, then one day I got in the elevator and saw him with the massive dude who was obviously his personal protection that day. Thought to myself:
"Isn't that the dude I've seen in the media...? Oh f*ck, it is."
We talked about dogs until I got off on my floor. Good guy to talk pets with, but I always checked to make sure no one looked like they were hanging around to do a drive-by shooting before I walked into the building after that.
His wife was more of a talker though so we chatted and one day she mentioned how his dad had died and left him his bike shop and they were talking with some rando lawyer to get his dads bills paid and some things to take ownership.
I'm not a legal expert but what she said didn't quite make sense so I said I'd have my sister (who is a lawyer) look at it to make sure it was all above board. Turns out they both had only rudimentary reading skills and this lawyer was predatory as hell.
I wish I remembered the legalities but that's really not my thing. In the end I helped him keep his dad's shop and I never had to worry about my safety at home or my house or pets when I went out of town after that.
He tackled an attempted burglar outside my window a year later. They were great neighbors and very appreciative.
I had a customer with capgras syndrome.
She was convinced that all her relatives were replaced by actors. "It's just really crazy, they look like them, speak like them, move like them. Ask them something about the childhood and they will know it. It is as if they were your relatives, but they aren't! It's all stored in a tiny chip in their arm".
At that time I wasn't aware of her condition, I learnt more about that syndrome years later.
When I talked to her at the time (as said, didn't know about the syndrome, just thought she was completely crazy) it was more like the World had stopped working for her. But it didn't matter much - as though she didn't know / couldn't say if or where all her relatives were living now, it was completely clear for her that all of those had been replaced by actors and that was completely logical for her.
But yes, I assume she had a really lonesome life. I quickly learnt that police was looking for her and during the next talk I called police on non emergency number for this reason, but I saw her around for a while later so it can't have been something too serious. I don't know what happened to her.
Oh we had a patient with Capgras when I worked at an inpatient psych center. She was actually a retired psychiatrist who was taking care of her elderly mother (she was in her late 60s so the money was pushing 90) and she was convinced that her mother was replaced by an imposter. She kept yelling at her mother to get out and eventually pushed her and she got hurt (which is how she ended up with us).
We only had her for a short while to restore her to competency so she could work with her attorneys so I didn't get to meet her. By all accounts she was a lovely woman and a perfect patient.
I worked at McDonald's and this dude applied, I'm the one who handed him an application, he gave off instant creepy vibes.
Pretty sure he was a psychopath. And he knew he couldn't fake being a real human in front of me, he would give me real sinister looks behind people's backs.
He ended up getting fired. He pushed a big ladder over that almost nailed someone and the camera saw it all.
He claimed he was "just venting off a little steam".
He came back as a customer and reordered the same thing like 10 times and just creeping up the place and trying to walk into the kitchen, to eat in the break room etc. Manager finally called the cops.
He laughed and bailed on foot across the highway. Haven't seen him since.
You've heard what Reddit has to say, but we're curious about your experiences.
Tell us about the most terrifying nope-worthy people who have touched your life.
Growing up, my parents insisted that I take my brother with me everywhere I go. The idea was that he, as a boy, would offer some form of protection.
The reality was that all he did was make my life miserable and create dangerous situations.
Now, this isn't his fault. This is 100% on our family, their built-in patriarchal B.S. (sorry latin people, you know I'm right - we have so far left to go) and their refusal to believe in medicine.
My brother was younger than me (by 5 years, that's a good chunk during childhood) and smaller than me, but because he was a boy he was automatically granted more freedom.
He could go out alone with his friends, I could not. He could date, I could not. He could do things outside of school and church, like martial arts classes. I was only allowed school activities or church activities.
What made the whole thing worse, though, was that his younger age and diagnosed but untreated ADHD meant that not only was he not "protecting" me when they would force him to come as my chaperone - he was creating problems.
He was only about 10, his ADHD meant he had poor impulse control and would climb facades on buildings, or rocks, or trees, or the sides of movie theaters. I would often have to grab him before he darted out into traffic, etc. I basically didn't go out or have a social life until college because of my parents rules and obsession with church (six days a week is incredibly unhealthy.)
And no, it didn't keep me out of trouble. It just made me a better liar who felt no remorse for the lies.
When your over-reactions and "Christification" of everything remove honesty as a possibility for anything, you make lying the only form of communication possible.
Reddit user AlePiga asked:
"People who grew up with strict parents, what’s the dumbest rule you had to live with?"
Strict rules clearly didn't work out well for these people:
"Rotating curfew types so none of them were overused."
"Today is the homework curfew, no going out until its all done AND checked (extra time wasted) Oh, no homework today? well dinner is at 4pm and you cant go out after dinner."
"..And today is the darkness curfew, which is around 4pm, not sunset or actual darkness, just when sunset is kinda starting. Worse during winter months."
"..And today is mom's workout class, you have to stay late at school or get taken along, and no you cant be dropped at home even if its on the way."
"NO you cant go out if you take the bus and get home alone, you have to stay there because nobody else is home yet. Whats that, no homework? well I've suddenly decided you need to read more, you are staying in."
"Yeah Mom was a super control freak for no reason."
"We couldn't drink soda out of the can in public because only 'common people' did that."
"I never understood it as a kid. I'm still not 100% sure why my Mum had this rule."
"As an adult I thought it's perhaps to do with people drinking alcohol outside. I asked her as an adult and her response was 'Well it is common looking' so I still don't know, honestly!"
"At cookouts and parties we have a small town rural District judge who absolutely refuses drinks in cups in public, and only allows himself and his family to drink from cans."
"He said it was about the implication of holding a cup, where the substance inside could be construed as an alcoholic drink."
"Such fun to have them around."
-Euphoric_SplinterLittle Rascals Reaction GIFGiphy
Seeing Other People
"I couldn't see the same person multiple times in a row."
"I had to hang out with a different friend before I could see the same friend again. I still have 0 idea what the logic there was, it was the rule for ANY friend I saw consistently."
"Concerned about you dating maybe? Or just being a control freak."
"Honestly they did this with any gender of friend so I'm leaning towards the control option"
"My phone had to be downstairs and plugged in in our kitchen, my parents had to know my password, and could read or open my phone at any time."
"I used to stay after school for an extra 15-20 minutes before headed home. In many cases since I’d 'Already gotten to see my friends' I wouldn’t be able to hang out when they went to movies, a friends house, etc."
"When I got a girlfriend, suddenly I wasn’t to be trusted with anything."
"I had to go straight home and could no longer stay at friends houses overnight. I was 18 and had my own car."
"I also got my phone taken away for several weeks after some of my friends sent 'inappropriate' memes in a group chat. I had no part in it, which my parents knew since they read everything, but I still got punished."
"When I was 19, and living in dorms, I finally turned off tracking on my phone so my parents couldn’t track my location."
"Not because I was doing anything bad, just because my mother had texted me the night before after I went to pick friends up from a club, and she demanded to know why I was there. I just couldn't handle being tracked any more."
"The next day, while I was at work, my parents drove to my work location and confiscated my car for removing tracking."
Doorway To Drama
"You can't close your door, if you do we remove it."
"In my house, it wasn’t allowed to be closed for sleeping, it was only allowed to be closed if your parent was in the room with you and wanted it closed."
"You want the door closed to change your clothes? Better do it in the bathroom and don’t take too long or the door will be opened. And behave or you might lose your bathroom door privileges."
-scarfknitterTrap Door Doors GIFGiphy
"When my dad got remarried I was 17 and had to move, my stepmother had the stupidest rules."
"Everyone had to sit in the same chair at the table, even if not during dinner time. She'd throw a tantrum if someone sat in a different chair."
"No hanging out with friends on the weekends"
"She would, and I kid you not, turn off the WiFi for the entire day if even one person decided not to go to church."
"We weren't allowed to walk through a bathroom - it was the best way to get to a part of the house. You had to walk around multiple rooms if you didn't just cross through that bathroom. I wish I was joking when I say she guarded that bathroom one night."
"Everyone has to go to bed at the exact same time (9:00PM) because the youngest 'wouldn't be able to sleep if other people were awake' - the youngest was 11 at the time."
"Not being allowed to study certain subjects because of my gender."
"My parents really never accepted the fact that I study criminology. They still blabber about how I should be studying tourism management since it’s more 'feminine'."
"My mom never had the chance to finish tourism college because of having me so she wants me to achieve her dream of becoming a flight attendant."
"She was a lousy mother and wants me to become what she wanted, but I have my own dreams to pursue. I can't live my life like it's a do-over of hers."
-louskeypushing air travel GIFGiphy
Jesus And Breadsticks
"When I was 17 I went on a date with a 16 year old girl who was new to my school. She had moved there from Northwest Arkansas. Her parents were really strict."
"When I showed up to our date I was told that we'll be traveling in her parent's car. I had to sit in the front with her dad and she sat in the back with her mom. They talked to me about Jesus the entire ride to the Olive Garden."
"She left a hand written note in my locker on Monday apologizing. No, we didn't end up together."
"Still worth it cause of the endless breadsticks."
Wrestling With Hypocrisy
"No watching wrestling, because it will make you g*y."
"I've put a bike lock on the fridge. no midnight snacks for anyone."
"Read one book everyday. If you cannot, you'll write sentences."
"I'm annoyed at the world. Get off the video games and go outside."
"No metal or classic rock because the Devil will influence you."
"No Trading Cards Because the Devil created it."
"No UFC because it's too violent."
"Basically, my dad made the rules and they were outright pathetic as I reflect back on it. That was only because he was an a**hole, and everything he did was hypocritical."
"He told us never to smoke pot, but a few years later we walk in and see him completely stoned, eating smarties and watching Jackass."
"Good thing I was considered a rebel in his eyes because I would've hated being a tool like him."
"I wasn't allowed to see most of the TV series kids watch because they were 'violent', 'distracting' or 'a bad influence'. Basically, when my friends talk about their childhood series or TV shows the only thing I say is 'sounds interesting'."
"All my friends' jaws drop when I say I never saw an episode of Phineas and Ferb or, like, Invader Zim. Those Cartoon Network or Disney Channel shows, I was just never allowed to watch them."
"I'm an adult now and it's at that point where I can't really go back to watch them just because I'm not really the 'target audience' and I don't have nostalgia, so they just seem so... childish and I hate that I can't enjoy them as hard as I try."
-NebulaDragon416phineas and ferb GIFGiphy
Strict rules typically come from a place of love (and fear) - we get that. But maybe try counseling instead of ... this?
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
I cannot be trusted with chocolate marshmallow cookies.
I don't even like marshmallows, but something happens in my brain when I bite into it and I no longer have an ability to say no. It doesn't even matter what brand - could be Mallomars, or pinwheels, or whatever your local store brand is.
Doesn't matter, just put it in the freezer and walk away. It's best you forget about it, because you'll never see the box again.
Reddit user ts_13_ asked:
"What’s a food you can’t buy because you will literally eat the entire thing in one sitting?"
Never. See. The. Cookies. Again.
But I don't feel bad about it, cause I'm absolutely not the only one out here with self control issues. Here are Reddit's snack confessions.
Serving SizeTortilla Chips GIF by Salsarita's Fresh Mexican GrillGiphy
"The larger size bags are a better value, but I almost always get a small bag. Why? Self-preservation."
"Regardless of how big the bag is, for me the serving size for chips is one bag."
"Same, can’t open a bag of chips/chip-like things (Doritos, Cheetos, etc.) without it being gone and me being full of shame."
"Crunchy, salty, and savory is a deadly combo for me."
"The routine is eat half the bag, lie to myself and save the other half for another day…an hour later eat the rest of the bag."
"Fresh warm French bread that just came out of the bakery"
"Dude fresh bread straight out the oven is literally heaven. I will eat an entire loaf, I’ve done it before and I'll do it again."
"I bought a breadmaker at the beginning of the pandemic and man it is dangerous."
"The loaves aren't huge so you can just... eat one. Like a snack loaf."
"Literally anything I slightly like"
"Yes, if I think 'damn these pickles are pretty good' there goes the whole jar PoP jut like that."
"Same with cookies, chips, anything."
"This is me too."
"Not just cookies and chips and treats, but regular meals too. It's gotten to the point where I only cook bland things because if I make something that tastes good I'll want to eat 3 or 4 helpings that night."
"Most snacks really. I don't have a sensible relationship with food."
The Brown DragonHappy Get Down GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy
"Cereal! Omg it’s bad. Specifically Cinnamon Toast Crunch (regular or the churro kind)"
"Someone brought in popcorn at work the other day. All sorts of 'gourmet' versions. One was Cinnamon and Sugar."
"It tasted EXACTLY like Cinnamon Toast Crunch."
"I killed the whole bag. Now I'm shaking. I need more. I'm chasing the brown dragon."
"Omg here in Texas, HEB sells horchata-flavored Rice Krispies. First it was Cinnamon Toast Crunch then it was the churros...now it's these."
"Canela es vida"
A Fascination With The Frozen
"Not the fancy ones, that 3 dollar bag of 24 twin pops. Had my girlfriend come home and see the side table by the couch full of sticks and just shake her head in disappointment at me."
"It's a childhood addiction I'll never shake, I guess."
"One day an old roommate bought a 48 box of ice cream sandwiches then went to the gym."
"By the time he got home I only managed to save him two."
"I like to eat all the colors and leave the grape ones , then eat the grape ones repeatedly until my entire mouth has frost bite."
"I've had to go to ER three times because of it and have given myself nerve damage."
"White cheddar popcorn... I turn into an animal"
"Same. My sister has a video tucked away of me emptying a bag of white cheddar popcorn into my mouth at a stop light while driving. She made sure my husband saw it before we got married."
"The amount of SmartFood family-sized bags that I have singlehandedly torn to shreds…"
More AnimalsHungry John Krasinski GIF by The Animal Crackers MovieGiphy
"Circus Animal cookies with the pink and white frosting."
"If surveyed, I wouldn't even say I liked them and it never occurs to me to buy them. But if they're around, get out of my way!"
"Have you tried them frozen? Discovered it by accident when I was staying in a place with no AC, and haven’t looked back since"
"Anything I like. I have ADHD and no self control"
"I have ADHD and I obsess over food too! Will eat the same thing for days until I don't like it anymore."
"The lack of self control is actually the worst."
"I binge food, alcohol, people, until I’ve f*cked up my body, my relationship, my job, or whatever else."
Hidden In The Toilet
"If it's in the house, it CALLS to me, and I am drawn to it like a Siren from Greek mythology."
"When my partner wants to have PB in the house, she literally has to hide it from me. And I've found it a few times, so she has to get REALLY CLEVER every time she gets a new container."
"Last time she hid it in the toilet tank, and I found it because I had to repair the flapper device and found it in there."
"I found my people. Can’t have it in the house. I will throw it away to save myself from myself."
"Everyone close to me knows it too, cuz I’ll announce it."
"No, no, no, get it out. I won’t stop eating it until it’s gone."
Easter Emergenciescrab GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"I made myself sick on Easter because I ate what turned out to be 11 crab rangoons in one sitting."
"I'm lactose intolerant. They're full of cream cheese."
"I'm allergic to seafood and I am addicted to them. Luckily they're usually made with fake crab..."
Alright foodies, you're up.
Go ahead and confess your snack sins. You're clearly among friends here.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
We all did wild things when we were young. Many of us still do wild things now.
Some of these actions were against the rules. Other actions weren't exactly banned but were frowned upon. And some actions were so crazy, no one thought about having a rule against them at first.
Sometimes, we do something so out of the ordinary that a rule is created so it won't happen again. These are often the best stories.
That's probably why Redditor TheBlackTemplar125 asked:
"What rules were put in place because of you?"
As expected, the answers held some great stories.
Making A Career Out Of It
"In middle school i would use sharpies to tattoo myself, other kids thought it was cool so i started charging $1 per drawing wherever they wanted. Principal found out and after i wouldn’t stop, she put a ban on sharpies for the entire school. even the teachers couldn’t bring them in. i’m a tattoo artist now."
Reversing The Joke
"In history class in high school, there was about 10 of us really close friends. We would take every opportunity to make “your mom” jokes. A couple months into class the teacher made us sign a “treaty” promising to stop making fun of each other’s moms. We signed it, and started making fun of each other’s dads."
Dads Change Diapers Too
"I got the Ryan’s Steak House buffets in Louisville, KY to put baby changing stations in the men’s bathrooms back in the 90’s."
"I did the same with a large craft supply store in Canada called Michaels after my first daughter was born and I had to change her diaper in the womens washroom. One message and they were installed within a week or two. I was really impressed with how quickly they took action."
"My daughter is almost 8 and I just told her last week that the change table in the mens room was because of her while we were shopping to make a mother's day present."
Get Out Of School For Free
"My elementary school was located in the center of the neighborhood, and my 5th grade class was the first to get outdoor trailers for classrooms. We'd ask for bathroom passes and then walk home. Next year they built a fence around the school"
Fire In A Crowded Hotel
"I put a croissant in one of those hotel toasters. It soon became engulfed in flames and needed extinguishing. Next day at breakfast they made a sign that said “if you’d like your croissant toasted, please ask a member of staff”"
One Evil Over The Other
"No typewriters in class."
"I was kind of a shit kid and while my school allowed us to use laptops, I would play videogames. Primarily Warcraft 3. In class. No sound or anything so I wasn't being a complete nuisance, but I wasn't doing my work."
"A teacher told me I couldn't use my laptop."
"I happened to have a 1950's Remington Quiet-Riter portable, all-mechanical typewriter. It was anything but quiet, with all of the TAKKA TAKKA TAKKA TAKKA... DING! you'd expect from a typewriter."
"After one full day of studiously taking notes and doing my assignments via typewriter, my teacher said I could use my laptop as long as I didn't bring the typewriter to class."
The Chicken On Fire
"Military school I went to. After me, an adult is required to check the parade cannon to ensure it is clear, and closely monitor the students as they load it."
"There is to never be another flaming rubber chicken flying over the parade grounds ever again. Circa 1989."
Changing The Curriculum
"English Media class in Highschool. End of year project was to film a movie. Me and 3 other guys decided to film a “gangster movie”. Long story short, while filming the final shoot out scene behind a local post office, we were swarmed by police and almost got shot. One of the guys got arrested and my teacher almost got fired."
"The following year, the curriculum was changed and the final project was now an essay to be completed on a popular movie."
Only Certain Gods Allowed
"freshman year of high school, I had to give an oral presentation on a random Greek god. this was at a Christian school, for context. I got Dionysus, so naturally I spent many hours researching on YouTube how to act drunk (wasn't much of a partier, so I didn't know) and pretended to be absolutely wasted for my presentation. it was a great success but my teacher unsurprisingly banned Dionysus for the following years. it didn't help that Dionysus was basically the god of orgies and bestiality too, if I remember correctly"
"Oh man, that teacher f@#$&?d up. How does a teacher assign a project on Dionysus without realizing what the material would be like? The dude was basically the Greek god of crazy parties."
Road Deaf Traveled
"Finally I get to add a personal story to Reddit. When I was walking home from school, I had to walk next to the road to get to my house. I decided to see if I could walk with my eyes closed."
"I didn’t feel the transition from gravel to road, and the cars didn’t honk at me (as they made a line), because they thought I was deaf. I heard a noise, looked back, and ran off the street into an orchard."
"Two weeks later, they put up Deaf Child Area signs on both sides of the road I live on."
"Why would they have thought you were deaf if your eyes were closed…?"
"This is my favorite because your eyes were closed and they put up deaf child signs. There goes a goofy but regular child, the cause of all this."
That last one was too funny!
Rules are created for various reasons, but sometimes they lead to some great memories.
When I was a kid, I decided to learn to be ambidextrous. I either handed in papers that were illegible or took forever to finish an assignment trying to write neatly with my left hand that my teacher eventually made a rule that only kids who are left-handed could write with their left hand!
It made me angry back then, but now, just like these other Redditors, I have a good story to tell!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Have you ever been arrested for something and thought... "well this is just silly?"
Yes we need laws and rules, but let's be honest a lot of "crimes" need to be re-examined.
Or maybe I just want to be naughty.
All kidding aside, too many people are sitting in jails for crimes that make no sense.
It's not right.
One Redditor wanted to hear about what illegal activities we'd love to indulge in. They asked:
"If you had to legalize a crime, what would it be?"
Shoplifting and weed. Let's start there.
FishyBig Fish GIF by PBS KIDSGiphy
"Being able to walk with a salmon suspiciously."
"The Salmon Act of 1986 made it illegal in England, Wales, and Scotland to 'handle salmon in suspicious circumstances.'”
"I’d legalize putting bikes in pools in California."
"Honestly, water biking is a great exercise and should totally be legal everywhere."
"Ding ding ding! you win!"
"Selling Unlicensed potatoes."
"As a potato myself, I agree."
"The UK government has effectively banned protests so I'm gonna go for that."
"here’s an article that explains it a bit. basically over here the police will now have more power to control protests. they can impose more measures, make sure people are ‘not being loud’ etc."
"Yeah super glad America doesn't have that. Right to protest is in our DNA. No matter how annoying, it’s necessary."
by deathdeath GIFGiphy
"Executing politicians for treason for any crimes or abuses of power while in office. Iirc treason and sabotage are both punishable by death according to the constitution."
Salmon? Really? Can I carry tuna or a nice cut of mahi?
Cheers all DayHappy Hour Reaction GIF by New GirlGiphy
"The ability to purchase alcohol at any hour of day, on any day of the week. How many of you have gone out late at night to buy beer only to be turned away because the alcohol section is closed, or not being able to buy any at all on Sunday? (in some places)."
"Feeding homeless people."
"I am guessing it is to discourage some psychos from feeding them sh*t (both metaphorical and literal). Reddit taught me about a cop, who gave a homeless guy a literal crap sandwich."
"It keeps people from poisoning them."
"I was enrolled in a clinical trial using psilocybin as a treatment for depression. After decades of treatment resistant depression, I'm depression-free. Even if it's temporary, I'm so grateful and I can't wait until everyone has access to this incredible drug."
"I am hoping that weed legalization can open the doors for mushrooms."
Bringing the End
"I know it's controversial, but I would say Euthanasia (for very bad illnesses and elderly, if they're miserable and don't want to go on anymore). Afaik it is legal in some countries, such as Switzerland. Just wanted to add I'm not American and therefore can't relate to all the comments telling me about situations in US states, but don't get me wrong, it's interesting nonetheless. :) "
SexJulia Roberts GIFGiphy
"Sex work. I'm not interested in it, but it appears to be an arbitrary law that would be a waste of time to enforce."
"Adults can have sex for money in front of the camera for all to see, but once the camera is removed, it becomes illegal? It doesn't make much sense. The only reason it's illegal, I believe, is that the government hasn't found a method to tax it."
Sex work is real work. Let these people be.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.