Just say NO! That's a famous 80's catchphrase about staying off drugs, but it is also one of the truest and most life-affirming mantras that many of us have come to appreciate. Saying no, putting one's well-being first, have become the new narrative for a society that was always over-extending itself. Sometimes you just have to decline an offer or decide that, no, this situation isn't healthy for me. And then the freedom you feel... there is nothing else like it.
Redditor u/SketchyByte wanted everyone to share the times in life they have never felt better by asking... What is the most satisfying "no" that you have ever said?"Just try..."
Go ahead, try it. NO! I love it. I can't tell you how many times I gave a yes out of fear, guilt, or shame. Then later all I had to ruminate on was regret. I don't enjoy the NO at the expense of others, but more often than not, I just have to recognize what a certain moment calls for and embrace it. I think the following people can explain.
Sorry Boo
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I got offered a lot of money to basically screw someone over in a court case. I said no and the satisfaction of telling a seriously spoiled rich kids dad no was the most satisfying day in recent memory.
Humans Suck
I work in an Animal Shelter. We had this very scared Cane Corso mix named Tae, who had the perfect look for the worst kind of dog owner: cropped ears and tail, muscular, beautiful grey coat. Tae needed a special low traffic home without any kids because he was very nervous and uncertain, likely due to his past, and we wrote an entire profile explaining this. A guy waltzes in, slams money on the table, and announces he's taking Tae (without ever meeting him, mind you.)
After finding out he had a three year old at home, I told him that wasn't an ideal situation for Tae and that we wanted to think about what was best for the dog. He gets nasty and says it's fine because Tae is going to be chained up outside. I was so satisfied to tell him we won't be adopting anything to him, as it is stated in our contract our dogs must be indoor pets.
No, he didn't like that.
Mother's House
Honestly, it would have to have been splitting up with my ex. He was at his mother's house at the time, and he said he missed me. I stared at the message for so long he sent another, "this is supposed to be where you say you miss me too." But i didn't miss him. Or walking on eggshells around him, having zero help with our newborn child, having so much trouble. So I said but I don't miss you. Easily the best no I've said, I only wish I had said it sooner.
"No, I'd prefer not."
Religious in-laws. Lots of holiday meals, they always stop before eating to Give a Blessing, taking turns, FIL assigns the leader of the prayer. For whatever reason, they do not single me out, and I certainly do not volunteer. FIL has a tendency to put people on the spot when he wants something done. After a decade, I assume it'll never happen.
Well.
Thanksgiving. About to eat, FIL turns to me "Will you lead the blessing." (note lack of question mark.)
"No, I'd prefer not." It came out of my mouth before I really thought about it, but it was the right answer. FIL looking at me like I just sprouted a new head. I repeat, very politely. "No, I'm sorry, I'd rather not." and that was it, the obligation was passed to one of my BILs.
I mean, I respect their faith, but I don't share it. The only meal blessing I know is the Grace* learned as a catholic kid, (took me a long time to understand the actual words) said at speed, which if I'd used that would have been mocking. And I'm not about to thank a heavenly father I don't believe in. I'll bow my head in silence, but this is not my faith, not my prayers.
My husband managed to stop himself from laughing, to his credit.
*blessesolord, antheezigfs, whicheeraboutoreceev, fromeyebuntytokrice, hourlower, AMEN.
Blocked
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Not exactly a no, but declining my ex-wife's friend request on Facebook felt pretty satisfying.
"Not Today"
See they get it. Are you envious enough yet to try it? Go ahead. NO. I'll wait. It can also be a silent NO. Just today this rude young lad tried to cut me off in the line at Target. Back in the day, I'd let that go. I'd wonder if it was worth the argument? What's the big deal? Then I said... NO. You do not get to treat me this way. So I informed him where the line began, and stretched to, so he could march his happy backside yon. Read on...
Rent Some Guys
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"so i see you have a truck"
"no... i will NOT help you move...."
"well damn."
LOL.
Yuck!
I said 'no' to a crappy job offer. They asked me if I was working already and I said I was unemployed but I wouldn't work for their company anyway.
There's one account that I won't accept projects on because of the way they abuse their vendors. I think my exact words were, "I'd rather eat cat food."
Dodged a Bullet
I got fired because the company panicked during covid and decided to fire me and another guy, they were genuine a-holes that didn't care about their employees. I could go into details but it would take way too long, so you'll just have to trust me on this one.
A few weeks later they call me back and asked me to join as they now realized that they actually needed me, he was almost certain that I would say yes.
I straight up told him "no". He sounded sooo disappointed and shocked.
Now nearly a year later the company is going under, everybody left because they hated the boss, and I can't say I feel sorry for them.
Peace Out
Overworked at an underpaying job in a warehouse. 14 hr days. 9 bucks an hour in a 15 degree industrial freezer. 2 15 minute breaks. They hassle you for taking a crap in between. I felt sick that day and boss man comes up to me with ANOTHER stack of orders after we were already doing the biggest one that day. Says "Hey I need you back in the freezer and i need you to pick up the pace a little bit" I just said "no" and walked the hell out. Hitchhiked home. Sun was shining. Dude that picked me up was playing Radiohead. Twas magical as hell.
Worthless...
Good Bye Reaction GIF
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After cheating on me, during our break up conversation, she said, "I wish you would have fought for me instead of giving up so easily.."
I said, "maybe if you were worth it."
Keep Your Job
I applied for a job, got it, was shown around the workplace, they explained how things worked etc. The day before I was to start they called me and said the guy changed his mind and was going to stay. A few weeks later they called me again and said the guy quit and I can now have the job. No.
The Voice
I used to work in an IT support call center. I eventually moved to a new job within the same company, but no longer doing support. Every time someone emailed me because I helped them previously, I really enjoyed telling them that I could no longer help them and they had to call the help desk. I love not having to use my "customer service voice" any more.
Bye Bye Bye
Get Out Theatre GIF by Tony Awards
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I had an ex send me a text months after we had a horrible and frustrating break up. It just said "I love you." I did the same thing where I stared at it for a long time. He had tried everything to get me back and I was just so over it, so I replied "I don't care." That finally got him to leave me alone.
Not Worth It
I did this to my boss at my last review. I didn't get a raise and was told I had to do three certain things to be considered for a raise.
Boss: You do these three things and you'll get a raise. Are you interested?
Me: No
Boss: So, you're just happy where you are?
Me: Yep
Boss- That's disappointing.
To clarify he couldn't guarantee a raise amount and he has no real control over how much I make. If I did those three things the company could have said "here's your raise enjoy this quarter". If they even gave me a raise. An unspecified raise isn't worth all the extra work they wanted.
Shush...
A cheating and manipulating ex asked me to connect via FB to 'just talk.' According to his opinion the time that had passed from when I found out he is a back boneless cheater until that day was long enough to be 'friends.' I said NO... And lived happily ever after!
Risk Factor
I was made redundant from my old job before Christmas due to COVID and I'd been wrestling with it for a while as I hated the job for years.
In the redundancy meeting they said I'd need to do a load more work and be limited to 3 days a week and I just said no, I'll take the redundancy. Risky move but I had 2 months notice to work through and I figured I could get a job in time.
After the meeting I saw I has a missed call from a job wanting me to start in 2 months as a day rate contractor and that is now coming to an end. I was offered a new permanent position at a 33% salary bump than the job I was made redundant from. Risky, but worked out.
Fur baby first...
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When I was given an ultimatum in my first relationship:
She said, "Either you give up your cat (my furry buddy), or I won't move in with you."
(She wasn't allergic to cats - she just didn't like them.)
So when asked, "Is your cat going?" I said, "No . . . you are!"
Click
When I finally grew a pair and told my "ex" (if you can even call it that because that was clearly NOT a relationship) to hell off. I stopped giving in and believing any bull that came out of my ex's mouth, sent my final text and BLOCKED. That thing even had the nerve to call me from a landline but I was smart enough to immediately hang up. There was a voicemail but my old phone got stolen, and I never ended up listening to it. Thank God.
Tired but Free
A couple years after I bought my car, the dealership called me in to discuss some sort of deal involving my financing. For two hours, they tried to convince me to trade in my car for a newer model before I realized that I could just ask for my damn keys back and get the hell out of there. At that moment, I felt both exhausted and liberated.
Gotcha...
Went shopping for rings with my then fiancé (been married for 16 years now) and when we walked into the jewelry store my ex girlfriend was at the sales counter. We ended up finding some rings there that we really liked, but they had to order some more because they only had the floor model. When I went to pick them up a week later, my ex wanted to know if I would take her back.
I was polite, but said that I was happy with my new relationship and that we really were getting married. I'll never forget the look on her face as I tried on my ring. Guess she shouldn't have cheated on me when we were together.
Stay Back
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When the guy I had a crush on dumped me and made me feel like crap eventually came back to me asking me to hang out and I said NOPE.
"NOOOO!!!!"
NO is not a curse word, nor is it hate speech. Some may see it that way but as you have read... NO... is an imperative part of life. Take it from my experience, you don't have to be a yes man in order to be a good person, or solidify relationships. People will understand, and if they don't, then they aren't introducing the NO in their lives nearly enough.
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I once had a guy ask me if I was willing to follow him into the woods, depending on the price of the meal.
Yeah. No steak is worth that.
Plans After...
Wait What Wtf GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Thanks for the ride but I have a date with someone else, I figured you wouldn't drive me if you knew I was going on a date with someone else and I really needed a ride."
"Online dating, talked to her for a while, finally got the courage to ask her out and then she said that as we got there."
iareyours
Mirror Image
“'You look just like my wife!'”
catalinachild
"I did have a guy tell me I reminded him of his son. I don’t believe English has a word to adequately describe my feelings at that time."
UnicornMagicRainbow
"That would definitely do it."
chaotica78
Third Wheel
"'Hope you don't mind if my mother joins us.'"
ofsquire
"Actually had a girl do this on a first date because she had anxiety issues. Honestly wasn’t bad except that 90% of the time she was silent and her mom talked over her."
"I didn’t mind that much and wouldn’t have minded trying again when she was more comfortable except that she was let go at the company we worked at and she deleted her social media profiles and she never responded on her number. Ah well."
Seightx
Liar
Lying Simon Rex GIF by Simon Rex / Dirt NastyGiphy"'Hey bro aren't you gay? I made out with you last night.'"
"Random dude I've never seen before in front of my (f) date."
JHXC16
Was he lying though?
Filter Issues
"'You looked better on Tinder.'"
waqasnaseem07
"Isn’t it basic knowledge that everybody looks slightly worse than the worst picture you can find?"
no_user_ID_found
The Past
"'My ex used to do that too.'"
xxIvyOF
"Yep. I’ve definitely had two otherwise-decent-guy date-situations sour because the ex-comparisons just would not stop flowing. No woman wants to be seen as interchangeable—I’m not here to perfectly fill that ex-sized hole in your life. Focusing on the present moment and a future we could build together is a courtesy we need to grant each other in earliest dates of dating."
LarkScarlett
Powerless
"'I'm an alpha, you cant handle my top energy.'"
Midnightgay28
"I actually left a dude in the middle of dinner, in part, for saying this. I ordered an Uber under the table while pretending to listen to him. Went to the bathroom, and never came back. That was when I was young. Now I’d just say, 'How about we enjoy this meal in silence, before we head our separate ways.'”
UnicornMagicRainbow
Mommy...
"'Mother says I should be back by 9.'"
"Saying 'mother says' just feels weird."
bunnyrut
"That gives me Norman Bates vibes."
Werewolf_lover20
"'Mother says alligators are aggressive because they have an overabundance of teeth, but lack a toothbrush.'"
sodaextraiceplease
Obvs...
just kidding jk GIFGiphy"'If you were going to be murdered, what method would you prefer. Purely hypothetical. Obvs.'"
Specific_Tap7296
If it looks anything like a Dateline NBC episode... RUN!
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Or so you would think.
Do people still knit to pass the time? Are people actively collecting stamps?
It depends on who's asking.
Curious to hear about hobby trends, Redditor gizehgizeh asked:
"What are once popular hobbies that are slowly dying these days?"
Before we've become conditioned to living on our phones, these activities used to keep people occupied.
Before Texting, There Was This
"Letter writing."
– littlekingMT
Literal And Tangible Joy
"Well the internet killed pen pals for sure. I do remember I had a Japanese girl for a penpal maybe back in 2007 or so. I honestly don't remember how it started, pretty sure some website, but that was a fun experience. But now I can just straight up talk to foreign people real time, lol. But yea getting a physical letter that someone took the time to write and mail still is hard to beat feelings wise."
– skyburnsred
Model Trains
"When I was growing up, every town had a model train store in it. Now I have one in region and everything else has to be bought online."
– Hairy_Effective1172
Pretty Rocks
"Don’t see anyone playing marbles anymore, I had an awesome collection in school."
– sheeple85
"I had some marbles as a kid in the 90s. My grandma got them for me and I had no idea what I was supposed to do with them. I always imagined them as a thing kids in the 40s played with."
– Ryoukugan
People Were Moving Canvases
"Paintball has been dying a slow death since 2006. Sad, really."
– hobo_recycler
Before the general population began hating clutter, collecting was once a "thing."
Precious Coins
"Coin collecting... I'm a silver/gold nut and I'm always hunting for precious metal coins. whenever I go into a shop they get all excited because 'no one under 70 collects coins anymore.'"
– ThatFishySmell99
Post It
"Stamp collecting."
– spooky_scully_mulder
"Collecting in general, really. Of course there are still prominent collectors but it's slipped more into enthusiast and niche territory than being a popular hobby that you might expect anyone to have."
– iuytrefdgh436yujhe2
What A Gem
"Rockhounding was immensely popular back in the 1950's and 1960's. Personally, I think it's a fascinating and fulfilling hobby, but when I go to a meeting at a rock and gem club, I'm usually the youngest one in the room by several decades."
– filthy_lucre
People once enjoyed making things.
Admiring The View
"Stained glass. I learned how to make it from my old man, and my junior high art class teacher also taught it. Very few artisans are still around."
– brobeanzhitler
Metal Vocation
"Black smithing."
– kenworth117
"I bought a forge to try. It’s insanely hard work, and crazy expensive. I still haven’t finished a piece."
– DSentvalue
Scrapbooking
"Yeah. I'm watching the arts and crafts stores around me completely uninstalling their racks for specialty paper. Now the only thing they have is mega packs of repeating colors/images. To boot all the inclusions like papercraft/die-cut things, washi tape, scissors, stickers, etc have gotten so expensive I would rather go buy $5 bags at value village to get an assortment of things versus buying anything new. I really, really miss yard sales for the same reasons."
– Phantasmai
I envy people who have jobs that are basically their hobbies.
Not everyone gets paid doing what they actually enjoy and have a profound level of passion for.
If they do, kudos to them.
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While the process could take time, some people make our jobs much easier after spotting instant red flags.
Curious to hear about our general radar of people, Redditor xxFluffie asked:
"What is something that makes you immediately dislike someone?"
Some people just think they are absolutely hilarious and never realize they're the only ones laughing.
Next In Line
"They laugh about having screwed someone else over. If you think you're not next, well, you'll learn."
– whiznat
Unfunny
"when you mention you don't like a thing and they immediately do that thing 'as a joke.'"
– wayfinder
Playing Devil's Advocate
"Kneejerk contrarians. People who, no matter what you say you like or believe, just have to dismiss it and say they like or think the opposite."
– BubbhaJebus
People who put others down get slammed here.
Bad Parents
"When they treat their kids sh**ty in public. I don't mean handling tantrums, setting a rule, having to hurry to the train etc. I mean perfectly normal-behaved kids getting in trouble for trailing along peacefully, looking at things, asking questions etc."
"If you don't like tiny humans who learn the world, why have them??"
– raxeira-etterath
Public Humiliation
"Treating people sh**ty in public for laughs. Like being rude to service workers because they think it’s funny. Big red flag."
– Ok_Personality_1080
Simply Uncalled For
"Someone who is a d*ck to other people or animals for no reason."
– xebt1000
Those with ulterior motives rubs people the wrong way.
The Scheme
"If they try to get me to join their MLM scheme."
– spazmcgee1
Hard Sell
"A guy I used to be friends with in high school reached out a couple of years after graduating about a business opportunity he wanted my opinion on because 'you've always been smart', then he set up a Skype call and brought some other dude into the call and they started trying to sell me on what was clearly an MLM scheme. The guy went from friend to 'I'm never talking to you again' in a matter of 10 minutes."
– Mental-Afternoon-164
A Timeline
"Good gawd, this! I've had more than one exposure to this abject bullsh**tery..."
- Back in the late 80's/early 90's I was invited to a meeting of literally the OG "Pyramid" where you're recruited to pay in, and then you go out and recruit others to pay in, and the last in line got f'kall.
- In 1995 I had a coworker try to reel me into Amway, which was a hard no.
- In 2000 it was Pampered Chef, though to be fair they did have useful products.
- In 2009 a coworker tried to get me into some stupid video calling service that was obviously stupid from the description. He even got offended when I called bullsh*t.
– Mystical_Cat
Too much ego is a no-go.
I Can Do Better
"Being a b*tch just to stroke their own ego."
"We get it, you can lift 5lbs more than the 12 year old, you don't have to rub it in their face just because you're slightly better"
– Livia_Pivia
Can't Top This
"Oh, you did <story that's been told>? That's nothing! I did <implausible story>.
"I get the whole empathy through relating common experience, and I'm someone who does that (which drives some people crazy on its own), but there's a big different by empathising through common experience, and one-upmanship."
– Tisarwat
Lacking Conversational Etiquette
"Starting to talk over me when I was already talking."
"Stop it you rude, arrogant jerk."
– R33Gtst
If one or more of these traits sound familiar to you, you're not alone.
We don't have time for braggadocios, pyramid-schemers, and conversation interrupters.
And that's just for starters.
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Pleading to deaf ears...
"My dad told me he had hearing loss and couldn't hear me if I whined because my pitch would get too high."
"Would completely ignore me until I asked him questions in a normal voice."
"Trusted him implicitly until I was 12 and he yelled at my younger brother for whining."- Tyrion_Stark.
Get it while you can.
"That they took everything off the shelves when the supermarket closed."- fgyfddg.
venezuela empty shelves GIF by euronewsGiphySilly superstitions.
"My grandfather used to tell me that if I played with the fire, I'd pee the bed."
"I believed him for a while, until I got older."
"I think he was just trying to protect me from the fire."- teddypa1981.
"Rain, rain go away..."
"That if it was raining where I was, it was raining everywhere in the world."- morningshartz.
Age is just a number.
"My parents used to seem really old to me, so much so I believed they grew up like cave people as children, wearing giant leaves for clothes and what not."- Laleena_.
Hammer Floor GIF by VPROGiphySo that's how they're made!
"That smokestacks from the power plant created clouds."- Scaniarix.
An instant cure.
"The sun gives you sunburns, therefore, moonlight should heal them."- velocipeter.
Better safe than sorry.
"Don't drink and drive meant all drinks."
"My dad was super confused when I told him he wasn't allowed to have any soda until we got home."- hulagirlslovetoparty.
Don't believe everything you see on TV.
"There was an episode of Mickey Mouse where Mickey couldn’t reach something at first, so he tried again and somehow his arm was long enough to reach it."
"As a small kid I believed that if I couldn’t reach something, I should just try reaching for it again and my arm would then somehow be long enough to reach it."- That-Dutch-Person.
love him one piece GIFGiphyThe miracle of childbirth.
"That babies are pooped out."
"When I was like 7 I was listening to my aunt as she explained that childbirth was pretty intense and painful for her, and I was all solemnly like, 'yeah, sometimes just my poops are painful, I don’t think I could get a baby out' and she went 'um, WHAT?' and her reaction made me realize real quick that I had f*cked up somewhere and I tried to change the subject while my mind was just reeling lol."- thesoundingfurrows.
Oh to be a child again.
And to believe literally everything you're told.
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