Enough pent up rage held over a long enough time will ALWAYS make an explosion. Some cry in the shower. Others scream song lyrics in the car. A few get into bar fights.
And some cross the big threshold, can actually envision the act of killing.
Yes, it does happen. Sometimes that first seed grows into a plan, becomes a committed, irreversible act.
But many just teeter on the ledge. Some Redditors spoke about their experience wobbling at the point of no return. Flirting with murder and snapping back seems to demand a combination of lucky logistical barriers and flashes of rational thinking within the impulsive fit.
When Mind and Body Don't Line Up
I was depressed, 18, and in the verge of a serious mental breakdown. So cut to the point, I clean the whole house for my mum as shes away with my grandma, I thought it's the least I can do for her! I go out to a friends and come back the next day and my mums going absolutely crazy at me for the house being in such a state. [Grandpa] had come home and trashed the house and said it was me, she told me I had to leave that day, I begged her to let me stay 1 more night as my friend was away, and he would be back the following day, she agreed and went back to my grandmothers leaving me and the prize ass alone. He smirked at me as she left, il never forget his face. That night he fell asleep on the couch with his head over the armrest, I silently cried standing over him with an aluminium bat just begging myself to have the courage to swing it and not stop swinging it. My grandmother called me and told me she loved me and that everything would work out. 3 months later he was gone. Only you fine people will ever know how close I came, I actually saw him last month, he looks like crap.
The BEST version of plans falling through
My intended accomplice must have thought I was just letting off steam when I was talking about it, and backed out early on. I wasn't up to it without the security of numbers. That was a little over 6 years ago, and I've since gotten psychiatric help.
Plan B is a far cry from Plan A
Guy cut my brakes which is pretty much a murder attempt. Thought about shooting him but since I'm the only one at that region with a rifle I would have gone to jail so I just decided to completely destroy his tractor
Right there with you. Both my Wife and Daughter were date raped. I didn't go through with it either - I was five inches from 1 of the guys that date raped my Daughter. I was in his garage and he was fu**ing cowering. I didn't have a weapon and he was still scared. I knew I was gonna kill him if I started hitting him. My Wife screamed stop and I did - because I love her. ....but still....
Letting things play out
Been a few times. Considered returning the favor to the guys that shot me, they went to prison before I could. Considered it a few other times when friends got shot, usually the same circumstances. The last time was when one of my best and oldest friends overdosed. I knew who sold it to him (some fentanyl laced heroine) and went there ready to save a few lives and avenge my friend, upon entering his home I saw him sitting on the couch and almost did it. As I looked him in the eyes it hit me, he was a lowly addict and having been there myself I realized I could hurt him much worse by leaving him alive to be haunted by everything he had done. In the end I sat down and explained the kind of pain he had caused me and many others (my friend, his family, his friends, other addicts, etc.) and I left. I don't know if he knew for sure why I went there to begin with but I'd like to think my words bother him to this day.
Elder wisdom, just in time
I was going to kill the guy who killed my friend. His dad talked me out of it. Made me see all I would lose if I got caught. Spending time with my kids has been much better than being in prison.
Sudden clarity of priorities
My mother abused me my entire life, she was a horrible mother and put me into situations where I was sexually assaulted regularly for her drugs. I put up with if for a very long time, but started to draw the line after having my kids. I stopped letting her abuse me and never let her take my kids anywhere no matter how much she pushed. She still regularly treated me like sh** and tried to push me into things that I was not comfortable with, but never unsafe any more. Earlier this year I got a notification that I had a large collection debt in my name for a service I had never received. I called up my mom to ask if she knew anything about it because it was when I was still a child, and she went on a whole rant about how she has been taking care of my kids and a whole bunch of things that weren't true. And I saw red. I was screaming and putting my shoes on to go to her house to kill her because I put up with sh** for too long, and then I saw my daughter. And realized I could never hurt anyone and needed to be with her more than I needed to get my revenge. So I just completely cut contact with her and I am done. Feel much better about it now.
Karma does its work
I went to another country to take care of a problem that hurt someone i care about. This person viewed me as a friend because this is what I wanted them to think. (This was years in planning) When I got there, I met up with people who gave me the stuff I needed, then waited a day. During that time i got some more info on this person, and it turns out people around him found out about his actions and it destroyed him. He lost his job, family, friends, and he became a fat alcoholic living in poverty. That is better than anything i could do as that will last forever.
A Flash of Clarity
I was only a kid, about 15. Got into an argument with the local "tough kid" and, long story short, got my a** handed to me. He roughed me up a bit and laughed while he did it. The beating was just one of those things, but being laughed at really stung.
I was so fu**ing angry. I knew where he lived, I knew the route he walked home, and I knew he took a shortcut through a little alleyway near my house. I went home and grabbed a hammer from the garage and a knife I kept under my bed, and I waited in the alley. I saw him coming, had the hammer ready in my hand. My plan was to let him pass me, cave his head in from behind, and then stab him a few times just to be sure.
He walked towards where I was hiding (the alleyway is a T shape, running between 3 rows of houses, I hid on the corner so I could surprise him), came so close to me I could easily have hit him, and walked right past. I couldn't do it. I just stood there for a minute, thinking about the sh** storm that would follow, and knew I didn't have it in me to face any part of that. In that moment, I knew I wasn't a killer. Just an angry kid who got carried away with himself.
The Good-Intentions Kind
Really thought long and hard about mercy killing a patient of mine. I knew he was still young enough to spend a couple of decades living as a vegetable in agonising pain if I didn't do it. I hardly had time alone with him though as I was helping a nurse (I had to wrestle him down while she sucked fluids out of his lung through his neck pipe) so I knew I couldn't do it secretly. I was basically weighing if I could kill a man or leave him be to suffer. I still feel ashamed that I didn't have the balls to go through with it but I couldn't think of a way to make it look like an accident. I hope he's dead.
Moms Have Some Sway
My mom talked me down from shooting my step dad on Christmas Day. I was 13 he beat me with a garden hose for not doing chores fast enough. I went in and grabbed my gun. My mom cried and begging me not to. I put my gun away and went to my room. He came up about an hour later and kicked the sh*t out of me. I went to school with black eye,bruised ribs, and welts. I told the teachers what happened. Nobody offered help or called the police. It had been happening for years. I assumed I must of deserved it. Took me 2 more years before I finally moved out.
Yeah my wife wonders why I have issues with Christmas.
Better in Time
I was about 15 at the time. My mom's abusive, pedophile fiance hit her during an argument. I tried to defend her and stab him. He caught my hand and it all just kind of went downhill from there. She left him shortly after that. When we moved I planned on setting his house on fire with him in it, but I was kind of a coward. Thankful I didn't in the end. She was in a good relationship after all that with a really nice guy.
She died about 5 years ago.
Everything's okay now though.
The fact that I can't physically survive in prison (multiple chronic illnesses/disabilities) is certainly what keeps my mother alive...
I know the exact guy who molested my wife and SIL for several years as young (pre-puberty) children.
But I do not want to go to jail, and fu**er is all over the Internet- so if I can find a popular enough platform or make it go viral, I would very much like to doxx him.
Destiny takes over
My sisters fiancé choked her until she passed out. If my mom didn't ask me to not end up in jail I probably would have never boarded the flight home.
Thankfully my sister is now in a happy marriage with a different guy.
Last I knew the di**bag is still alive, even though he does his best not to be since it wasn't long after that that he rolled his vehicle multiple times while drunk.
Thinking about the kids
My nieces dad is a piece of sh*t through and through. Lived off my parents while my sister was pregnant, beat my sister after she gad the kid, neglected my niece because he "just so busy and doesn't have time", and threatened to kidnap my niece if my sister went after him for child support. I realized that catching a felony isn't worth his life. The best thing I can do is help my parents, who got custody of her, raise her better than he ever could or even would. I'm not sure what my parents will tell her about her dad, but I intend to tell her the truth about him.
I cosidered pushing my ex-sister-in-law down the stairs because of how she was treating my brother. Would have been so easy to make it sound like she tripped over the dog. I didn't do it because my nephew, he needed his momma.
To Stay a 'Non-Murderer'
My reputation. I've always been what you call a good person and people think highly of me. I can't change that. Ive resisted the urge to kill someone so far so I think I can do without killing someone to keep my reputation. I've acted normal this far and the urge isn't killing me so I don't think I'm a psychopath.