"Why are you single?" –– And just like that, Redditor Uninfectedl got to the point, asking a question that hits a sore point for so many of us.
If you're wondering why I'm single––which I guess you're not, because the average person doesn't look at bylines and assumes articles online spring directly from the void––it's because I'm enjoying my solitude. I also live alone and certainly enjoy it!
Everyone has their reasons; some are more complicated than others, as we saw once these people shared their stories.
"I don't have..."
I don't have a wide enough social circle. I mostly only hang out with a small group of dudes in similar places in their lives to me. It's a situation I want to work on fixing, but it's been difficult through a pandemic.
"[I] don't think..."
Married the love of my life and he died... dont think I`ll ever find something that good again, so I dont even bother looking.
"I'm socially awkward..."
I'm socially awkward, boring, shy and my life isn't really the best to expect another person to enter my life so I just don't try anymore.
"I have no idea..."
I have no idea how to express interest to any of the women I've ever been interested in, so I just end up becoming friends with them and the crush eventually goes away and I start over at square one.
"You feel guilty..."
My depression is chronic and lifelong.
People like the bubbly, flirty, pretty girl they meet, but have never made me feel comfortable when I'm withdrawn, tired, flat and hopeless.
I don't know when that second person is coming, but it always feels like they're around the corner. It's exhausting have to manage depression with somebody else in your life.
You feel guilty for feeling the way you do and your love for the the other person makes you want to pretend you're not depressed to spare them the negative cloud.
"I've never been invited..."
Complete lack of self-confidence, I've never been invited to a social event of any type where it could happen there and past attempts to approach women have failed
"I'm not sure what broke..."
Because after my last relationship, I just can't feel for another person in a romantic way anymore. I'm not sure what broke me from it exactly, but there are just no feelings there. I've certainly tried, it's been 4 years now, but outside of a fleeting sexual energy that motivates me to talk to a woman on occasion, there is just no emotion that could lead to a relationship that I can find. My last one ended pretty badly after quite a long time, lots of gaslighting and manipulative behavior along with some other details I'd rather leave out. I was responsible for some of it, she was responsible for some of it, ultimately I've moved past it. But for some reason, despite having been a hopeless romantic my entire life, there is just nothing there anymore.
"I push away anyone..."
My parents fought my whole childhood so I have absolutely no idea what a good relationship looks like. I push away anyone who gets close because I dont want to turn out like my mother and suck the soul out of my spouse. I'm so scared of hurting someone else that I refuse to even try. It's a real struggle.
"Changes to my body..."
I'm worried that cancer is too much to bring to any new relationship. Changes to my body such as losing my hair have truly effected my self confidence.
I wasted the good years of my life on someone not worthy. And now I'm too old to be desired in society's eyes. Wonderful.
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