Surviving childhood is hard enough, what with school, potential bullies, and the mysterious secrets of the monsters hiding in your closet. While not all of these were true for every kid, there are many things we might have believed in while younger that ended up not being true, like the following stories below.
Reddit user, u/aardappelpureetje, wanted to hear what you used to be believe in when they asked:
Willing To Die For Your CraftThe Simpsons GIFGiphy
That actors were really dedicated to their work.
So dedicated in fact, that they were willing to die (die in real life) in my favourite movie just to showcase their dedication.
God Is There!
That God was a tarp. My class was being taught about God in an old church that was being renovated, and the man explaining to us "God [is] there" and pointed up.
There was a huge green tarp, and my kiddy brain thought "that is god! The tarp!"
Pretty Sure Every Parent Had A Reason For Not Allowing This
Turning on the lights while my dad was driving will 100% result in a car crash
My dad would tell me that if I turn on the light inside the car while he's driving at night on the highway our car would be marked and targeted for [robbery.]
Clear That Air Behind You
My best friend's brother told my friend and I when we were around 5 or so that if you farted whilst walking you had to "cut" the smell with you hand or it would follow you. I believed this for quite some time and would make violent slicing motions with my hands behind me if I farted! Hahaha!
What Uncomfortable Family Reunions...
When I was in elementary school my best friend and I heard of this word called " sex", and we'd constantly ask friends or family if they wanna have sex. We had no idea what it was and idk if we thought it was cool or what. We said it so casually for like a year. I still cringe at the thought of it. No one told us what it meant.
Wind It Uphomer simpson spinning GIFGiphy
If I spin fast enough with my arms stretched out like a star, I could fly.
If I was strong enough, I could bend down and place my hands below my feet and literally carry myself.
last but not least, I thought growing up was amazing.
All dogs are boys and all cats are girls.
"There's no way to disprove that - have you ever seen a cat penis??"
You Have To Work Hard To Become An "Oprah"
That "Oprah" was some kind of title for a person who talks to people on tv. Like Dr Phil or those evangelists that are called Reverend such and such. So I thought Oprah Winfrey's first name was Winfrey and Oprah her job description.
Clearly Kids Know Nothing About Clouds
I thought clouds come out of chimneys of factories
I thought clouds didn't move, it just looked like it because the earth was spinning.
I thought clouds only appear in the day and was gob smacked when I noticed clouds at night.
Wait, That's NOT How It Worked?
That women peed out of their butts (I literally didn't know the vagina existed lol)
That women got pregnant randomly. I didn't know sex involved intercourse or conception, I thought it was just when people got intimate with each other and rolled around naked and stuff
And, The Honest To True Winner...angry bart simpson GIFGiphy
I thought that the people that lived in the time of black-and-white pictures actually saw the world in black and white instead of colour. So basically, i thought colour was invented after pictures with colour was invented.
I had a similar misunderstanding. I always wondered why really old black and white footage was fast. I thought that maybe everyone was just faster back then.
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We are inundated with lies every day.
Now in this era, our job is to call them out.
One simple truth?
Nothing is as good as it seems.
It's all a fake.
Redditor Doctor_Engineer wanted everyone to be warned about lies we need to be ready for.
"What is 100% a scam?"
I think the biggest scam I fell for was Publisher's Clearing House. But who didn't?
"The people that call my house trying to sell me duck cleaning. I don't have a duck."
"The individual who called me yesterday claiming to be 'US Customs and Border Patrol' who said I had an illegal package from Mexico in my name."
"I love these. I have an array of responses, including: 'Listen very carefully. You need to make absolutely sure that s**t moves. They know where you live' and, of course, 'What a coincidence! I work for ICE. Let me talk to your superior real quick.'"
"You too? I was told they had someone detained at the border that had my personal info and that I was the one who gave it to them. I asked them, being they claimed they were in possession of said information, what my full name, DOB, and address were?"
"The 'sugar mommies' on Instagram that keep trying to talk to me."
"I talked to one for awhile trying to figure out what his scam was. I'm pretty hot but I'm under no illusions that a 40 year old MILF is in very high demand for sugar daddies. He stopped talking to me when I insisted on a $300 'good faith' deposit to proceed."
We can’t give you a raise yet because (X), but if you work hard and prove your competency, there will be a raise next year."
"We don't have the money to give you a raise but if you quit we'll hire someone (probably less good at the job and with less experience) to replace you at a higher rate than you're currently making."
"Or better yet, work hard and take on responsibilities of the next level with your current pay and you might get promoted to that next level."
Boomim sorry andy samberg GIFGiphy
"Nutriboom. But I will say this, Debbie Stovelman is happy, healthy, and alive."
Damn you Debbie.
Lessons...Angry Lets Go GIF by BrownSugarAppGiphy
"Those Alpha Male courses."
"I took a beta male course once. In the first lesson, the instructor slept with my girlfriend. I learned a lot."
"Hydrogen-rich water. Had someone I know (this person is also into MLMs) try to sell me a thousands of dollars water filter. I looked up if there were any legit studies done on the health claims, and as I suspected, I didn't find any really compelling science. Turns out most of the claims pretty much line up with the health benefits of just drinking more water in general."
"Pretty much all Youtube ads these days. If it starts with 'this one trick can' or anything like 'doctors hate this' doctors hate it because they have to explain green tea doesn't cure type one diabetes. To be honest it's flat-out dangerous false advertising but youtube doesn't care."
"Kids iPhone/iPad games. My kid is downloading these 'free' games that constantly ask her to buy an extra skin or a treasure box of thousands of coins to upgrade and keep playing. It’s really scummy because they know exactly who their audience is, children who have no concept of money."
Secretsrich gold GIF by OffsetGiphy
"Anyone - A-N-Y-O-N-E - promising to teach you the secrets of becoming wealthy at a free seminar. I have a family member that got sucked into the Kiyosaki bulls**t vortex. It's a damn cult."
Beware the scam. People will do anything to part you with you money.
Do you have anything to add to this list? Let us know in the comments below.
Everybody loves to save pennies.
In this time of financial worry saving money is a must.
One of the ways we've always saved is by buying generic.
Sometimes the name doesn't always matter.
But there are instances when those extra pennies need to be spent.
Sometimes name equals better quality.
Redditor AndrewIsMyDogwanted to discuss what things they will always spend a little extra on just because of the name.
"What 's a name brand item you refuse to replace with generic?"
I do mostly generic, except when it comes to vodka. Quality matters when it comes cosmos friends.
Vest of...cerkl team GIF by CerklGiphy
"Post-It Notes And practically anything else made by 3M."
"3M is S tier. Basically every product they have is the best version of that product."
"Swingline stapler. If they took my Swingline, it'd be the last straw."
"I inherited my grandpa's Swingline when he passed away. He had his own business and had the darn thing for years prior. He's been gone for 23 years and that stapler ain't never gonna quit."
"I just looked over at my favorite stapler at work and saw its a Swingline. The thing was like $30 but it takes a beating and has never jammed."
"Cheaper doesn't always cost less. Story below..."
"I worked at a Lab and for a little while they had a program where if you made an improvement that saved the company money you got a reward for a portion of the savings (10%). It was meant for process improvement, increased efficiency, etc. but the person who worked in purchasing got one for saving money on office supplies by switching to cheaper 'store brand' supplies. I think they got about $20,000 for it."
"Anyway I went from having a Sharpie last 1 to 2 months of writing on glassware, slides, petri dishes, etc. to going thorough a pack of knock off sharpies a week. Any savings in per unit cost were wiped out, and then some, by increased consumption of supplies. They switched back to the previous supplies within a couple months."
"I'm guessing someone had some serious explaining to do to the senior executives once they found out they gave someone $20k for an idea that cost them money."
God, it's so good...
"Also Crayola crayons, markers, color pencils. I’m all for the store private label options in other areas. However the off brand art products are crumbly and produce mediocre results."
"I buy Crayola not only for their overall quality, performance, and durability, but also and most importantly I buy them for their iconic scent. God, it's so good. All core regions of my brain light up when I take that first hit off a fresh 64 pack."
"Crayola ultra wash is the only brand of marker and crayon allowed in my house because it is really easy to get off of most surfaces."
Be CleanSeason 5 Episode 10 GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy
"Dawn dish soap. It's just good, and really not that more expensive."
"I've used blue Dawn to take old oil stains out of concrete."
As you get older, you don't realize how important dish soap is.
Top of the LineAgt GIF by America's Got TalentGiphy
"This is pretty specific but Scotch Commercial-grade Packing Tape. The Uline tape is freaking terrible."
"Nilla Wafers. The off-brand versions tend to be flavored differently and they leave a funny aftertaste."
"Slayton Bakery Vanilla Wafers are so much better! H‑E‑B has them in Texas. They make Nillas taste like the crappy store brands."
"Swap a graham cracker crust with a nilla wafer crust. Especially with something like lemon cheesecake. Way better. In both taste and texture."
"409 cleaner. Nothing else works the same."
"Same. But I've been noticing that Clorox is downplaying 409 in favor of Clorox brand, the amount of shelf space of 409 is shrinking."
"They also keep changing the freaking label or adding all these different product lines... 409 Plus! 409 Bathroom! No, I just want the regular 409 cleaner."
"Ticonderoga pencils. All the other ones don't hold up to intense note-jotting."
"The Dixon Ticonderoga set the bar for pencils. But, friend, you haven’t lived until you’ve taken a spin on a Papermate Mirado Black Warrior. https://www.amazon.com/Paper-Mate-Mirado-Warrior-Pencils/dp/B00006IEES"
"You freaking pedestrians aren’t ready for the Palomino Blackwing. 'The Cadillac of pencils.' - Wirecutter https://blackwing602.com/products/blackwing-602-set-of-12"
WrappedWrap Moving GIF by 3 Men MoversGiphy
"Plastic wrap. It's worth it to buy the name brand because the box doesn't fall apart."
"Have you heard about our Lord and Savior, Kirkland? I've been using my same roll for years."
Generic is a good deal. But sometimes you need an upgrade.
What would you add to this list? Let us know in the comment below.
Have you ever tasted something that everyone kept swearing by?
You get all excited, so you taste it, and when you do... you wish you were dead.
No. You wish they were dead first.
There are many foods where the buzz is all hype and facade.
One Redditorwanted everyone to share which menu items are not as loved as we have been led to believe.
"What food do you swear people only pretend to like?"
I am very up front about my food dislikes. And I'm always looking to cross things off the list. So give me more...
WoofExcited Feed Me GIF by Morris the 9Lives CatGiphy
"Cat food. I mean come on, my cat can't like eating that every day. I think she's just being polite."
"My mom made stuffed cabbage once. I kinda like stuffed cabbage now but I didn't like cabbage anything as a kid. She left it cooking while we went out somewhere. When we came back the cabbage smell whacked us in the nose and I said I think the dog pooped on the carpet. She believed me for a second before realizing it was cabbage stank."
"Chitterlings. My mom-in-law made some at my house, and it smelled like a grown man crapped all over my home and walls."
"My family was from plantation fields in the Carolinas. Some still stayed but my grandparents went to NY. Relatives from the south mail buckets of that stuff lmao. I mean good stuff too like cracklins and vegetables as well but man… freakin' buckets of chilttlins so yea if you know you know."
"Hákarl. I can’t imagine someone coming in from a long day of work and tucking into a plate of fishy smelling, ammonia flavored chewy shark chunks that make you smell like a bait camp for the rest of the evening. It seems like survival food - you will stay alive if you eat it, but it’s not appealing… to me. If you’re Icelandic - please help me understand why this is a thing."
VileVomit Puke GIF by The Late Late Show with James CordenGiphy
"Once upon a time I swore that salted licorice was the most vile thing ever to have graced our fair planet. However about a year ago my wife made me try some and much to my surprise, I liked it!."
Who can even pretend to like these things?
I Don'tHarry Potter Pastel GIF by Pasteleria Cake TownGiphy
"Fondant on like wedding cakes."
"Ever since I saw various 'weird eats' shows, I have had trying lutefisk as one of my bucket list items. (Yes, I am weird, I'll admit.) I have a friend from Minnesota who, for some reason, refuses to help me on this item."
"It's just really bland fish with slightly worse texture than normal. Nothing special about it. It's not gross or funky tasting, just really plain and unexciting."
"There's an emotional reaction to foods (and other sensations) that develops over time. Eventually, it gets to the point that the food--regardless of what's disgusting about it--makes you feel something enjoyable and pleasant."
"If I'd never eaten Bleu Cheese before, I'd be disgusted by it now. But, I unknowingly had some when I was 4 or 5 at a family Christmas party in a cheeseball. When I eat Bleu Cheese these days, it reminds me of warm happy Christmases of decades long ago."
"My roomie be eating squid out a can."
"I like fried calamari the best. Had a can of squid that was ok. Added it to ramen. Tried another can of squid that included the ink. Kind of grossed me out but reminded me of sardines in tomato sauce (The ink was mixed with tomato sauce). Managed to eat it all on some ramen but won't be getting the ink one again."
Entitledtrippy GIF by Pi-SlicesGiphy
"Gold leaf -need I say more?"
"It has no real taste- it’s there so that you can feel rich and entitled."
Well I'm no longer hungry.
What would you add to this list? Let us know in the comment below.
It's always odd to hear about people who idolize the Joker and Harley Quinn. Isn't it very apparent that those two are in an abusive and codependent relationship?
You'd think so, but if you spend a little time on online message boards or looking at any memes, you'd see a host of representations of Joker and Harley Quinn as "relationship goals" when they should be anything but.
Clearly the people who read those comics misunderstood the assignment, and they are not alone.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor WhereDemonsDwell asked the online community,
"Which fictional characters are idolized by people who missed the entire point of their story?"
"Walter White. You're not supposed to root for the murderous, ruthless, self-centred, ego maniac drug lord by the end of the series. People do."
People tried to turn his wife into the villain. If anything, she was the only character in the series to stand up to him consistently and people hated it.
"Tom from 500 Days of Summer."
"Really liked the character and could associate myself with him in my younger self but he's living in his fantasies more than understanding his reality."
This is the kind of movie that hits different when you're in your early 20s compared to any other time.
Bonnie and Clyde
"Not fictional characters, but Bonnie and Clyde. Cool if you wanna have an adventure with your ride or die, just don't kill 13 people while doing it."
People loved and adored them because they saw them as heroes taking on the banks that caused the Great Depression. No one really knew how terrible they actually were except the cops who were hunting them down.
When they were killed, their bodies were towed through the streets of a town and people crowded around crying and sobbing like two movie stars had been killed, then started ripping their clothes trying to get souvenirs.
The movie from the 1960s did not help.
"Tony Soprano. I don’t get how people could look up to him, when the whole show is about how he hates his life."
Because the show deliberately tries to trick you. David Chase constantly pulls you between sympathizing with Tony's very real, very human problems (most of the therapy scenes, the ducks, etc.) and smacking you in the face for even considering that he might be a good guy.
"Holden Caulfield, The Catcher in the Rye. He wasn’t being refreshingly rebellious, he was crying out for help. He was probably mentally ill, and definitely emotionally scarred by his brother’s death and the unhealthy way his parents handled that tragedy."
I think the brilliance of that book is depending on your stage of life you can take something very different each time.
The Joker and Harley Quinn
"Joker & Harley are still idolized as an example of crazy passionate love despite it being clearly established as an abusive relationship. It’s a shame the movies had to cut out most of the really bad Joker abuse because then maybe the point will be driven home."
See? What did I tell you? People acted like they were Gomez and Morticia which is... so not the case.
"Vito Corleone. Everybody knows Michael is a monster but he’s only his father without the “family man” charm. Both of them are ruthless murderers."
And the story is a tragedy. You'd think people would have learned something...
"Scarface. So many wannabe gangstas and rappers with Scarface shirts and posters."
That was my thought too. It's like everybody only watches the first half of the movie.
"Tyler Durden. Hands down."
Yeah I think the socioeconomic message was lost on most people who just paid attention to the first half of the movie.
"Lolita. I hate that the name has become synonymous with young, seductive, coquette types. The entire book includes accounts that she was an unwilling participant and trapped."
It's interesting how so many people pretend like Nabokov glamorized Humbert Humbert. Nabokov wrote him as a lying, murderous monster.
Chances are, you can think of people out there who misunderstood the assignment, too.
Like, is there anyone out there who actually idolizes Don Draper? (Answer: Yes. Sadly, yes.)
Have some suggestions of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!