There are so many secrets a single person harbors throughout their lives.
There are secrets they tell some others, secrets they tell only the closest to them; secrets they tell no one, and then secrets they don't even tell themselves.
Occasionally one of those secrets slips out. And that secret has the power to change the space in which you live your life.
It can bring others closer or isolate them even further. It can do serious damage or be a healing agent.
It all depends on the secret.
Redditor dougy181 asked:
"What is a dark secret that you have?"
Here were some of those answers.
Pandemic Secrets
"Last year I went into the hospital for Covid. I had to be put on a vent for three weeks, put into a medical coma, resuscitated a couple of times and was pretty close to death for those entire three weeks."
"My dark secret is I wanted to die. I was going through a divorce and suffering from severe depression. I just felt like my world was over and there was nothing to live for."
"I was almost happy that a virus was going to do what I was too chicken shit to do myself. I was accepting that death was coming and didn't care to fight it."
"It wasn't until while in my medical coma they had my family come to tell me bye as they thought I wouldn't make it through the night that I decided I wanted to live. I am an only child and was raised by a single mother. I heard her telling me how much she loved me and that I was such a fighter and to keep fighting."
"That was a moment that turned everything around. It gave me a will and want to live. I had a turnaround that night and lived and slowly started recovering. It has been a long and hard road to recovery and I am still not there yet. Had I not had that moment of hearing her I am pretty sure I would have died."
"I have told my mom about how much hearing her meant to me, but I have told no one about how I was ready and wanting to die at that time. If the hospital hadn't lifted their Covid protocols to allow my mom into the room to say goodbye I think I would have just accepted death."-throwingaway_316
To The Grave
"My best friend from childhood came over to my college dorm to hang out one night. He bought coke and pills from other guys living on my hall for a party he was going to, and honestly I was impressed with him for being so well-versed in the buying of drugs and charismatic with my dorm mates."
"Before he left he told me not to tell his mother what he was doing but to tell her he loved her if he died and I thought something was wrong, but I let him go because we had plans for the next day and I figured he had just developed a dark sense of humor in the time since we’d last seen each other."
"In retrospect he’d shown all of the signals, but I refused to see them, so I let him drive away. He didn’t make it; he crashed his car many hours later that night, with no seatbelt, probably high."
"His mother asked me what happened. I didn’t tell her anything because I wanted her to think it was an innocent accident. I didn’t want her to know what he got into. I’m still keeping his secret."-jrm2003
Fake It Til You Make It But Srs
"I had a friend create a fake High school diploma for me, then I used it to get a job teaching English in a foreign country. Then the company that hired me created a fake BA in English for me."
"That was then used for me to get my residence permit.....Yup."-Naive-Camel-7364
These secrets have been bursting at the seams to come out for ages.
Gotta Eat To Live Gotta Steal To Eat
"Years ago, I got a summer job at a grocery store. I was a teenager, from a poor family, just trying to get a job so that we could afford food. My mom couldn't afford to feed us in the summer without the school lunches, but she made slightly too much to qualify for food stamps."
"If you've ever been poor, you know how it goes. The manager was a complete a**wipe who fired me two weeks in because, and I quote, 'I just don't like your personality.'"
"We had never actually spoken until that point. I cried because my mom was counting on me to be able to pay for the groceries that week and I told him that. He told me I was being dramatic."
The store had these barcodes they would stick on things to mark them down if they were expired. I realized that I still had the rolls of printed-up stickers in my pocket when I got home because I had been marking things down that day. I copied the stickers off onto sticky paper and stole probably a few thousand dollars of groceries that summer."
"I technically did pay for the groceries because I was checking them out at the self-checkout and paying money for them, but I was getting salmon fillets and racks of ribs for $2, big veggie trays for $1, expensive cheese for $.99, etc. I was careful not to be too greedy and not try to buy a cartful of expensive sh*t at a time."
"I would do several smaller transactions at self checkouts and spread it out over about a dozen stores (it was a big, sh*tty, national corporate chain). I paid always in cash. I never got caught. I told my mom that I got an academic scholarship and that's where I got the money for the groceries. I don't feel bad about it and the statute of limitations is expired anyway."-ScyllaOfTheDepths
These Actors Were Perfectly Cast In Their Roles | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Sometimes an actor comes along that is able to reach the audience on a deeper level. The actor that immediately comes to mind is Robin Williams. Although it ...Bébé From Beyond
"My aunt kept hearing other baby voices on her baby monitor - not her baby. There were no babies next door but it must have been picking up some other baby somewhere and as I am in I.T. I knew this."
"But as a joke I told her I saw a program on TV and that baby monitors can pick up deceased children. I thought she knew I was joking but then I find out she got a priest in to bless the house."
"Then she put it on the market for cheap and moved out. I think she lost 50-100 grand. She never mentioned it to anyone else in the family why she was moving and I just kept quiet and kept it to myself for all these years feeling guilty."-Happy5Day
Petty Legends
"I had a former coworker who was a total c**t to me. She straight up bullied me at work. Twice i walked into a room while she was actually sh*t talking me by name."
"A few months after quitting that job, I looked up a revenge prank site, and had a box of cow sh*t mailed to her at my former workplace."
"According to other people still working there, she threw an ugly crying tantrum the day she opened the package and was coddled by upper management. Sweet, sweet vengeance."
"I didn't tell my live-in partner about what I had done, he would have been livid and scared for the feds to show."-SummerNothingness
Obligatory Poop Entry
"Summer camp, I was 13/14 years old. Seven days no poop, in the middle of the eighth night I wake up because I'm exploding."
"I don't reach the bathroom on time, so I pooped almost everywhere while running, I reached the bathroom, washed and then went back to my tent to sleep."
"The next day everyone thought an animal like a bear or deer had entered the camp and sh*t everywhere. No one ever found out that that bear was me."-afabri
Are these bringing any secrets up to the surface for you?
Black Widow
"My maternal grandmother, who recently died, murdered at least one of her husbands for his money, and possibly more (because she had several who died under mysterious circumstances)."
"She was never convicted, but the dude died from rare earth metal poisoning that developed from years of eating tainted food."
"She cooked every single one of his meals during that period of time. Notably, she did not get poisoned herself."-Doomkauf
A Son No Matter What
"Not exactly dark but I'm pretty sure my son isn't biologically mine. There was a lot of doubt about the date of conception and multiple people his mother cheated on me with. But after months of being promised he was mine I foolishly just accepted it or told myself to anyway."
"Cut to him being 3 months old she decides she's scared of him and can't look after him. He's now 7 years old and never sees his mum, she's vanished and doesn't even check in with him."
"He's my son no matter what anyone could tell me as far as I'm concerned at this point though, I've raised him and loved him unconditionally for the past 7 years and will continue to do for the rest of his life. And if I'm being honest I'm also really scared to get a DNA test more than anything for fear that if I found out he isn't mine I wouldn't love him or look at him the same way."
"I don't think I would ever do that personally but you just never know how a highly emotional situation is going to make you react or feel sometimes."-niell2
Secrets are highly emotional and complex pieces of information that we've given a bit of undue weight to.
The fact is, that truth that you're keeping down low has the potential to really set you free—if you work WITH it.
But working against a life of secrets is no way to keep a life alive.
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People Break Down The Absolute Worst Parts About Having A Child
While starting a family and having children is a goal that many people have, some do not realize that it's not easy, fun, and loving one-hundred percent of the time. Rather, it's expensive, exhausting, and hard, though it might be worth it in the end.
With this in mind, people shared what they felt were the hardest hurdles of their parenting.
Redditor ApprehensiveShock655 asked:
"What's the worst part of having a child?"
Fear of Not Doing Enough
"The constant anxiety that you’re doing enough to shape them to make good choices, a good life, be a good person and for them to have the life they deserve."
- nakedreturnsthe1st
Like the Energizer Bunny
"It's incessant. It never stops. You never get a day off."
"Going from having two days per week to relax and do whatever to literally never having a moment free from responsibility."
- mrbuh
No Break In Sight
"I’ve always wanted kids and still do, but this is the only thing that has come close to giving me pause."
"Both my siblings have young kids and I cannot get over how CONSTANT it is."
"From the second the kids wake up to when they finally shut their eyes, it’s non-stop. Then they get maybe an hour or two to themselves, which is mostly spent tidying up, etc., before the nighttime stuff starts with the baby crying, the toddler coming into bed, nightmares, etc."
"It requires years of not getting a full night's rest. You can never just go out whenever you want. No sleeping in, even on weekends because someone has to be up with them at 6 AM."
"Raising human children is an insane task."
- GirlisNo1
Mom's Body After Baby and Dad Bods
"The weight gain is the worst! During the pregnancy, I gained 35 pounds. My belly has stretch marks. My boobs are all saggy."
"And it’s not even fair because my wife only gained like 15."
- Wise-Reaction-7526
The Meal Planning
"Coming up with three meals to eat per day EVERY DAY stresses me out so bad."
"This sounds like such a small thing, but it really wears on you over time. You can’t just make something for yourself or something you and your spouse feel like eating: You have to constantly be thinking about if the kid is hungry and what they might be willing to eat."
- Ravenclaw79
Keeping Them Safe
"When people ask me this I say, 'do you know those video games where you have to escort a character to a destination without them being attacked?' That's parenting. Those missions are a pain in the a**."
- Infiniski_Gaming
Seriously, Keep Them Safe
"Having to deal with their total lack of self-preservation. They are creative and come up with all kinds of ways to try and kill themselves. Keeping ahead of the game is exhausting."
- Quizzical_Chimp
Constant Contact
"They’re just always there. On you, behind you, in front of you, just a little speed bump impeding every task."
- Tangboy500000
Letting Them Live Their Life Their Way
"Having a kid is like having a little piece of your heart running around in the world. When they're sick or get disappointed or just feel sad, it's worse than having it happen to you."
"Yet at the same time, you need to let your kids work through those things to learn to handle them. If you give into the worry and try to shield them from everything, you risk creating harmful co-dependence."
"So it's a constant struggle. But worth it!"
- um_chili
What Is "Sleep" Again?
"I'm only nine years in, but so far, it's been the sleep deprivation. Hands down."
- tessiegamgee
And What Are These "Sick Days" You Speak Of?
"Having to take care of a sick child when you are also sick. For me that has been the most challenging part so far."
- MrsLouisaMercury
Another Full-Time Job
"It's like taking a second job that lasts 18+ years with a 24/7 schedule with no holidays or sick days."
"…And no second paycheck. It's actually like YOU are paying your second salary instead of getting one."
- mouse_rat
Personal Freedom
"The loss of freedom. I can't just... go somewhere. Even with older kids, there's so much planning and thinking and getting ready."
"I miss being able to just decide to go somewhere, and go there."
- poetris
The Time Flies
"The best advice I got was from an ancient hospital security guard in an elevator. 'The days are long, the years are short, cherish them while you can.'"
- WayOfTheHouseHusband
So Unexpected
"The phrase I hate is, 'You don't know it, but one day you pick your kid up for the last time.'"
- 3_pac
There are all kinds of troubles that come from being a parent, many of which people don't necessarily think about until they already have a baby in the house.
But reassuringly, many people in the subReddit pointed out that no matter how hard some of these hurdles are to get over, it's still worth it in the end, and it goes by far too fast.
Married People Explain How They Tactfully Initiate Sex With Their Partner
Positive emotions are high among people in the blossoming phase of relationships.
Everything seems more romanticized for people in love due to the amorous joy in their hearts–which also influences their desire to frequently get it on under the sheets–or any other daring location in the heat of the moment.
But for those who've declared "'til death do us part," devoted couples may find that they are not always on the same wavelength sexually compared to when they first met.
Curious to hear how people keep their passion alive, Redditor Rude_Phone6841 asked:
"Married people, how do you initiate sex with your partner?"
When verbally articulating isn't enough...
Let The Book Dictate When
"There is a book called 'How to Subtly Tell Your Partner You Want More Sex.' If you sleep on the right side of the bed, you can casually open it up and your spouse will see the giant printed title on the front. Sometimes, I’ll just get the book out and leave it on his side of the bed. Once he was messing with me and acting like he was oblivious to my not-so-subtle hints, so I threw the book at him. The book is effective and hilarious."
"ETA: Sadly, we haven’t found the book since we moved. Fortunately, we’ve started communicating with our words instead. Words are just as effective."
– Flaky_Finding_3902
Save The Date
"I send her an outlook calendar event and if she accepts, IT'S ON."
– Dawn_Piano
The Signal
"You know when I’m down to my socks it’s time for business."
– SEA___BEAR
These couples find that verbal cues are best.
Now's The Time
"Honestly when we have the time one of us usually bluntly says 'let's go have sex right f'king now before we can't' and we go do it. Lol"
– brie1305
Option A Or B
"I have a 2 month old and a 2 year old. Some of the best sex we had was because I said 'after 2 year old goes down and if 2month decides to sleep do you want to meet in the basement' well she decided to sleep and damn that was good."
– Ahkmedjubar
End Of Day Reward
"We just ask each other tbh. We’ll bring it up earlier in the day so we build up the anticipation with each other throughout the day, flirt with each other, gas each other up. All that. Then when it’s finally time at the end of the day, we usually fall asleep cause we’re so tired."
"But the cycle continues the next day!"
– supermariobruhh
People continued offering their wisdom.
Afternoon Hanky Panky
"The trick is to initiate sex during the day. We are both too tired at the end. Plus hanging out all day after is somehow more rewarding."
"Same goes for dates. Have sex at the beginning the date, then go enjoy your time together without any pressure."
– drneeley
Kids In The Equation
"This literally happened today with my wife and me. We have two toddlers so we’re extra exhausted. Earlier today we had the sexy initiation of 'hey, we both showered today, want to have sex after the babies are asleep?' 'Sure.'"
"Then when the kids were asleep, and my wife and I were getting settled into bed, she asked if I still wanted to. I said if she wants to I’m down, but I’m pretty tired and would be fine without it. She said she was also tired and could do without it. So we kissed each other good night and she went to sleep. I’m just winding down on Reddit for a few minutes before I also fall asleep."
"I know this is boring. I didn’t write this to tell an exciting story. Just to share what married life is like for me and probably the large majority of married couples, especially parents of young kids."
– MolotovCollective
Shadow Puppet Technique
"Use my phones torch to shine a shadow of my member up against the bedroom wall."
"Kinda like a bat signal of sorts."
– SchoonerOclock
Mood Lighting
"Turn off the lights and switch on the red lamp beside the bed."
– SuvenPan
Reliable Visual
"Walk by him while taking my top off. He follows me wherever I go and it's been 30 years and counting."
– LisaBooHigh
Every couple is different, and usually establishing a strong communication bond makes everything else in the relationship–including sexy time–falls in line effortlessly.
I knew a couple who made a game out of foreplay and agreed that whoever got home first from getting off work at the same time got to choose the sexual position that night.
They may no longer be together, but I remember them recalling how that technique was fun for them at the beginning stage and it took the pressure off of establishing when they were going to have sex.
Don't take get too anxious about it. It's just sex, and it's fun.
There are a number of things people partake in spite of the known possible ramifications they have on their health and safety.
Up to and including smoking, bungee-jumping, recreational drug use, or simply bike riding without a helmet.
Indeed, even though they know that doing any or all of these things could possibly lead to their death, they do it anyway.
Sadly, even though many people go out of their way to avoid doing these things for that very reason, that still doesn't mean they keep themselves completely out of danger.
Sadly, there are a surprisingly large number of things that lead to an even more surprising number of deaths each year.
Frighteningly, these are things that the majority of the world's population does on an almost daily basis.
"What causes death more than people realize?"
When In Doubt, Call Your Doctor!
"Untreated infections."
"Your body will become septic, in which it essentially kills itself trying to kill off whatever infection one has."- cacarrizales
"Infections that are left untreated."- raptor-99
Tread Carefully. Seriously.
"Tripping."
"On average around 17k people a year in the US die from injuries incurred after tripping and falling."- EdithWhartonsFarts
When In Doubt, Don't Drive.
"Driving while sleepy."- latchkey_adult
The Handrail Is There For A Reason.
"Stairs."
"20 million severe injuries each year and at least 200,000 death from consequences of the fall."
"Both my grandparents died because of a fall."- OnTheGoodSideofLife
They Happen To The Best Of Us
"Fall accidents."
"Especially among the elderly, a fall can create a cascade of events that results in death, even if it seems minor at first."-AdmiralBofa
Never Rush Chewing
"Mozzarella sticks."
"Statistically the most choked on food."- SpecSanders
Never Skip A Check-Up
"High Blood Pressure."
"It sneaks up on you and you don't know about it or don't care but it's the underlying cause of so many deaths."- Fear51
Never Underestimate The Importance Of Self Care
"Stress."
"Your body can only handle so much of it and it’s labeled the 'silent killer' for that reason."
"With your high blood pressure and the 5 hours of sleep a night because of the stress, It will creep up on you sooner than you think."- DroppedDonut
Don't Forget To Floss!
"Untreated dental problems."
"A cavity left untreated can lead to heart attacks and strokes."- Lastalmark
Flu Season
"Influenza."
"Just regular old flu."
"Many people ignore it thinking it'll go away on its own."
"Globally the number per year is usually between 300k and 500k."
"In the US it can be anywhere from 12k to 50k per year."- PhreedomPhighter
Don't Feel Ashamed If You Need A Break
"Shoveling snow."
"I have two family friends pass from heart attacks associated to shoveling the snow."- JD054
There Are People Who Will Help You
"Alcoholism causing liver failure and it's on the rise in the USA."- Interesting_Drop8236
"Peruse your County ME’s records."
"The amount of people who die from alcohol is astounding."- hockenduke
Sometimes, It's Just Best To Mind Your Own Business
"Street fights."
"You watch some Hollywood blockbusters and some MMA fights and you think you can do it too."
"I've seen stories of a guy minding his own business and gets rocked on the side of his head. It disconnected his spine and he was dead before he hit the ground."
"There was another story maybe a year ago of a scuffle where a guy was stabbed in the neck and bled out to the point of being unable to stand within 10 seconds."
"Stop f*cking around, it's not worth your life."- Choiceofart
We never know when our number is up or how we'll end our days.
However, with a little bit of care and good judgment, we can at least likely avoid falling victim to all of the above.
When Americans visit a foreign country, they tend to notice immediate cultural differences from the minute they step off the plane.
Unique bathroom designs, how you might have to be more specific when ordering coffee in Australia, how many businesses in Spain tend to shut down for a few hours to take a siesta.
Needless to say, this goes both ways, as when people from all over the world visit the United States, they tend to be surprised and amazed by a number of things.
Ranging from the amusing, such as portion sizes and ineffective tea brewing (at least for the Brits) to the truly baffling (HEALTHCARE).
"Non-American people, what’s a thing that you don’t understand about America?"
You Mean, People DON'T File Their Own Taxes Elsewhere?!?!
"Does every worker have to file their own taxes or am I just confused?"- ThePencil67
"Why they make you calculate your own taxes, if they know what you owe."- redder2023
Flagrant Commercialism...
"So, why do you buy politicians' merchandise? "
"Shirts, caps, banners, stickers, etc."
"They're public servants, not rockstars."
"Also, usually the more boring they are, the better."- akashyy
Conor Mckenna Influencer GIF by FoilArmsandHogGiphyWork/Life Balance
"Scottish person here but the work/always available for work culture."
"Minimal vacation time, minimal maternity/paternity leave and the fact you can pretty much just be let go."
"It makes me sad to think about it!"
"But I do love that you guys cram so much into your time off - you guys love a road trip!"- Frosty_Dragonfly_682
Definitely Something To Consider...
"What is up with Homeowner Associations?"
"Why would you pay to let a nosy neighbor dictate what you can and can not do on your own property?"
"I understand living in an apartment block and paying maintenance fees etc, but in a suburban home?"- Skoodledoo
There Are Some Good Observations
"The amount of National Parks!"
"My dream came true in 2017 to make an RV trip southwest off USA."
"Yosemite blew my mind away."- Independent-Ad9787
national parks GIF by Visit The USAGiphyHAHAHA
"How you can say the word 'mirror' without the use of any vowels."
"Mrrrrrr."- Otto1968
I Ordered A Small!
"Why everything is just SO damn supersized."
"My first time in America I went to get ice coffee from Dunkin Donuts, I ordered a large and my friend is like, 'are you sure you want large'?"
"Yeah no biggie, in the UK a large is not overwhelming I feel so I was expecting the same kinda thing."
"Oh my god it was like a god damn bucket of coffee."
"I think maybe a small would have been equivalent to a UK large, lesson swiftly learnt."
Some People Are Lucky To Just Have One Roommate...
"How you have to share a room with some complete rando when you go to college."- ChoppingOnionsForYou
Roommates Move In GIF by James Madison UniversityGiphySome People Just Can't Stop Talking
"The culture of just talking to people, strangers you don't know and just up and start a conversation with them or join a conversation."
"I'm British, and we go through great lengths to not talk to people, let alone open up and pour our hearts out to a random person."- MrGlayden
In Other Words: Severs Deserve to Be Paid More!
"The tipping culture is so foreign to me, I would be so scared to make a mistake or not tipping enough if I ever go to America because it's not something which is common here in Denmark."- Cupsuu
The Commercials, Maybe?
"I’m American but I’ve worked with a lot of people who aren’t."
"The one thing they always wonder is why Americans are so obsessed with the NFL."
"They think it’s a boring sport."
"They explained 'you wait for 30 seconds, they hike the ball, you get about 5-10 seconds of action, then you wait another 30 seconds, another 5-10 seconds of action, then commercial break'."- yougotthesilver12
Kansas City Chiefs Football GIF by Fighting Illini AthleticsGiphySchool Is No Place To Have Fun!
"My mom is from Moscow during the Soviet Era, and she is confused why there is no teacher-student hierarchy."
'She thinks it's weird when teachers participate in school plays or speak to students informally."
"She also DOES NOT GET pajama day."
"To her, it's just the weirdest thing in the world."
"In Russia, there is an important distinction between 'clothes for home' and 'clothes for outside'."
"They have a concept of 'home clothes', like your cozy or ugly clothes, that you are supposed to change into after school or work."
"At bedtime, you change out of your 'home clothes' into pajamas."
"As a result, pajamas, for both adults and children, are considered extra-extra private in Russia."
"My mom perceives pajama day as something extreme like wearing only undergarments to school."
"That's how private pajamas are considered to be in Russia!"- racheltolmach2022
A Debate Which Will Likely Never End
"MM/DD/YYYY"- SuvenPan
animation domination calendar GIF by gifnewsGiphyLiving in America comes with a number of advantages and a number of detriments.
Speaking personally though, had I known I wouldn't have to file my own taxes in Australia, I would have expatriated long ago...