People Who Were Forced To Choose Their Pet Over Their Partner Break Down How It All Went Down
Image by Foundry Co from Pixabay

It can be hard bringing a new person into your pet's life.

You want your romantic partner and your pet to get along. That won't always be the case, as it can turn into a matter of two clashing personalities that were never meant to be in the same room. Don't feel bad. You do your best to find the pet that's right for you while putting that much effort into finding a partner that's also right for you.
That doesn't necessarily meant they'll be right for each other.

Reddit user, u/sugar-soad, wanted to hear about when you had to make the hardest choice of your life when they asked:

People who were made to choose between your pet or your partner, how did your ex react when you chose your pet?

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When The Partner Tries To Impose On The Pet's Territory

Your pet becomes just as much as part of your house as you do, forming their own favorite spots to lay down and finding their favorite chew toys. When you have a romantic partner, especially a new one, who comes in and thinks they have a greater stake in your home life when you've only just started dating, then you know there's a problem.

Don't Come For The Dog

True story. I'm paraphrasing. My friend had his girlfriend spend the night at his house. While he was making her breakfast she began complaining about his "nasty dog". My friend told her, "You should stop complaining, the dog lives here and you don't".

They broke up a week later.


Don't Try To Outlive Cats

I remember him saying my diabetic cat needed to go so he could get a dog. We weren't even living together. I looked him dead in the eyes and said. "My cat will outlive this relationship" considering she was really sick at the time he said it was unlikely and stormed off.

We broke up 6 years ago and my cat is still going strong.


Look At The Time

Not me, but my sister was dating a guy who angrily accused her of loving her elderly cat more than him. She said she did -- she had had him for 14 years and they had only been dating for about a month.

Guess he wasn't expecting that because he just kind of shut up and left the house.


Making Irrational Demands

I had a boyfriend I dated for a few months and things were starting to get serious. One day he said "you know if we ever move in together your dog will have to be an outside dog. Dogs aren't meant to be inside." My dog was a 7pound chihuahua. I told him if he was not willing to change his mind we would not be moving forward with us. He told me it was my loss.

I was ok with that. After that I would try and find excuses for my pup and potentials to meet before. When I met my now husband he told me he did not like small dogs. He met my pup and fell in love. Sadly she passed away two years ago but he just celebrated 12 years ago. I hope the other guy found someone good for him.


When The Partner And Pet Don't Mix

Sometimes, a person and an animal don't naturally mesh well. That's the reason so many pet adoption services do so many background checks, home visits, and interviews, to make sure the person and pet being paired up are going to do well together for hopefully the next several years. Bringing a new person into their lives can sometimes lead to bad vibes rubbing off one another.

Seems Like The Other Person Had A Choice To Make

I recently broke up with someone because he was allergic to my cat. He lived about an hour away and we really clicked but I couldn't convince him to spend the night at my place ever and I told him point blank that Pudge was here first and he'll be here probably another ten years. So I didn't think it was going to work out. He suggested we move somewhere with a basement and Pudge could just stay in the basement or outside. Hah. I was like hard no buddy. My current SO loves my cat so much. He bathes him monthly and feeds and plays with him. He adores him and honestly I get a little jealous of them haha.


Fighting Like...Well, Like Cats And Dogs

Two friends of mine dated seriously years ago. Girl's cat had jealousy issues and peed on guy's shoes. Guy put cat in the bathtub and pissed on cat. Relationship didn't last much longer.

Edit: I really should have mentioned that he was wearing the shoes when the cat did this.


Animals Know. Oh, They Know All Right.

The dog chose me lol I divorced my husband and his dog destroyed his house and sadly wouldn't eat properly or do anything but stress until he came to live with me and my dog. But to be fair, my ex is terrible at pets. He just kept him outside all day and night with no interaction. The dog is a Great Dane and at the time it was me, my toddler and my dog in a little town house but we gladly took in the big guy over keeping him alone and miserable with his actual owner.


Spiders Aren't For Everyone, But, Wow. What A Jerk.

I bred tarantulas professionally for a few years. Most were in a specially designed shed outside, but I had a few in the house. Was totally upfront with people when dating, and if it was a dealbreaker, then no hard feelings.

I dated this one guy for a few months, but we'd always go out or to his [house]. I didn't really think much of it. Around month 4, he started getting annoyed and one day, straight up asked me how long it was gonna take to "sell a few spiders".

I thought he was talking about my actual job, so I was like, "oh, I sell them in bulk to a supplier. He's coming round on Tuesday, actually." And my bf was so relieved, but I couldn't really understand why.

So the dude comes round on the Weds and sees the tarantulas in the house and goes on an [absolute] tirade about how I lied to him, how I've broken his trust, and how he's gonna need time to heal. NGL, I just burst out laughing. I was like, "you really thought I was gonna give up my job for you?"

Well that was apparently not the reaction he expected. He stormed out, yelling about how I was such a dumb b-tch for not realising how great he was lmao. Tried to crucify me on social media, but he just ended up looking like an idiot lol


Unnecessary Hate​

My now ex and I were together for 5 years when 8 rescued my 3 legged dog kelsey, for some reason he couldn't stand her, she really is the sweetest thing. After 1 year of moaning and threatening me over her I was getting to the end of my tether. We'd been together nearly 7 years when one day he said it's me or the dog, I looked him dead in the eye and told him not to let the door hit him on the way out. He moved out and kelsey and I have since adopted another 3 dogs


Then There's Those Truly Awful Reasons...

You'll know the moment. It clicks, right away. You have to choose either the life of your beloved animal or staying in a romantic relationship with a person who clearly has no interest in keeping them safe.

The choice should be easy.

Give Them The Dignity Of A Decent Death

I had a 17 year old basset spaniel mix. He was suffering from arthritis and would sometimes yelp when moving. The girl I was dating suggested she could mix a few drugs up and allow him to die peacefully. She even offered to do it for me so I wouldn't have to know since she didn't believe I had the nerve to do what was best. That was the last time I ever spoke to her.

A year later a friend saw him and believed he only yelped when moving because his pig sized testicles hurt when banging against his legs when walking.

He eventually passed away and I had him cremated. My friend asked if they charged me extra for the 2 bowling balls he was sporting.

This was 5 years ago and she still jokes about my dog's testicles.


You Can Just Tell

I found out my girlfriend was hitting my dog when I wasn't around. I left her and she was unable to admit that was the reason. I guess answering the question of "what happened to you guys?" With "oh he found out I was secretly hurting his dog" might make for awkward conversations.


How did you find out?


You can generally tell when someone's been hurting a dog or a cat based on their behavior towards that person. Like, if a dog that was previously super excited and happy to meet new people or interact with people that you bring over is now skittish and hides from specific people, or is suddenly aggressive towards them, there's a good chance that they've been hurt by that person or have seen that person hurting someone else (ex: a child).

I have a cat that has even placed himself between me and something that he thought was going to hurt me. It was the vacuum cleaner, but the thought was still there. Animals know when something is scary or dangerous, and will usually let you know how they feel about it in their own way.


...Dump That Chick.

I found out that me ex had been talking to her mom about putting my dog down while I was at work and just telling me she ran away or something. Before that moment I never would have thought I could have violent feelings towards someone. But now I know in my heart that there's a serious possibility I would have hurt her had she actually done it.


On the surface, it can't be easy choosing between a human and an animal. It might feel wrong in some ways. However, if you're a truly good pet owner, you know that their life and comfort matters just as much as any other living thing.

Even if it means going single for a little while longer, do what's best for every individual involved.

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