Why don't people listen? Some of us are sages walking the Earth just trying to espouse the truth... soak it in. Granted we often throw out our wisdom when it is unwarranted, but it doesn't mean it's false. That is why so many people hold to the mantra of... "told you so." Maybe we should look at the statistics of when people don't follow warnings and advice.Redditor u/FizzledTwizzle wanted to know about the times you've given advice and then all that followed after by asking.... What did you try to warn someone about except they didn't listen and it turned out very badly?
My 6 year old brother at the time was standing on the kitchen table with his socks on and it looked like he was about to jump off. I kid you not, before he jumped I literally said "don't jump off the table with socks on or you'll slip and break your arm." 5 seconds later he jumped off the table, his feet slipped out from under him, and he landed directly on his arm... breaking it.
I walked in to work one day and my boss said, "Hey! I just hired somebody who used to work where you used to, her name is Xxxxxxx Yyyyyy, you know her?"
And I was just like, " Oh nooooooooo."
Yep, two nights later the owner of the bar across the street calls as we're closing up and says, "So just FYI, one of your servers is over here, in uniform, telling everybody where she works...I say 'in uniform,' but right now she's dancing on the bar and taking it off."
You've been "Shipped"
I tried to convince my roommate he was getting scammed on craigslist. We talked, we argued, I even pulled up google and showed him pages worth of people saying they should've never sent the money order. But somehow it was different cuz the bank took the check earlier that day. Well, a few days later the bank called and said the check didn't clear, which was around the same time the buyer and the "shipping company" he was using disappeared too.
Not Hercrazy girl fun GIFGiphy
I told my boss not to hire the girl who showed up to her interview late and in a belly shirt, now we have a worker who perpetually calls out and whose dad has shown up to try to change her work schedule.
I told my college housemate that she needed to slow down her drinking because she was making horrible decisions and putting herself in dangerous situations. She threw a tantrum, screamed at me that I was a know-it-all and "not her mother" and she moved out and in with another friend. The next week she was driving drunk and wrapped her car around a tree on campus, wasn't wearing a seat belt. She broke a lot of bones in her face and looked like a monster for months. Luckily everything healed and she ended up getting the help she needed.
Say "I Don't"
I tried to tell my brother that he should not get married to someone he met only a few months ago, barely knew, never lived with, and that I personally found very shady.
He got mad at me and got married anyway.
The marriage lasted one month. Two years later my brother is in a very eventful divorce, buried in debt, lost many friends, quit his job, is back at our parents house and has depression.
This is the short version, the full one could be a whole soap opera 25th season.
Dude was buying an apartment off-plan (meaning you pay a % before the build even starts) and he send me the plans online. I'm into architectural design so I quickly spotted it was off; all the furniture on his floorplan was shrunk dramatically to make the space appear much bigger than it actually was underlined with:
*for illustrative purposes only.
I drew up a rough quick 3d model to scale with the furniture as it was on the plan and put some real size humans in the space and sent it to him as a warning. He got angry with me and suggested that I "insulted his intelligence".
It wasn't just a little bit off, it was dramatic. The full size bath would have to be a sit up bath or a shower. The furniture was shrunk by almost 50%.
He's now the proud of owner of a micro apartment.
Wipe ItThrow Away Clean Up GIF by Preparation HGiphy
Told my aunt that my cousin seemed in pain when he was passing stool and urine. Everyone said that all children and babies do that. I didn't buy it so i continued pestering.
Turns out he had serious rash in his bottom due to lack of cleaning and had urine infection. the rash was so bad that the skin in that area became thinner than paper.
My mom asking me about putting money in this company which was obviously a Ponzi scheme. I told her to not listen to her moronic cousin and not to put money in it because it is not real. She lost a few thousand dollars and asked me to get it back for her. I was so mad and begrudgingly did it cause mom has been a minimum wage worker since forever and that was all she had. I wasn't able to get all of it back. She lost half of what she put in after the feds were through with it.
In the holemoney pit esta casa es una ruina GIFGiphy
A gal I know insisted the new mansion she was "buying" would be repaired and maintained by the previous owner.
I asked her why they would do that if she wasn't paying them.
It was a land lease. That's like renting from an individual who holds on to the legal ownership. She didn't understand she had no rights and was basically living in a hotel until she was $500,000 in the hole. They kicked her out the second month of the pandemic.
A Strong Back
Guy in high school wanted to prank his best friend by taking his chair out from underneath him when he was standing. I told him repeatedly not to, lest he went mad and told the teacher. That didn't happen, of course, instead, something worse did.
The guy's backbone was severely injured as he'd landed straight on it, and had to be sent to hospital. Now his back is bent, he cannot sit without acute pain... all because of someone who wouldn't listen to me.
Seat belts Onseason 5 GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy
Told my friend to wear his seatbelt. We were both in the back seat. Minutes later we hit a light pole. He flew from the back seat and made a 12in hole in the wind shield. He ended up with 32 stitches on the top of his head.
One of my soldiers was dating a chick who had already been engaged to a guy in our company. We knew her backstory and warned him that she was bad news and to stay away.
Three weeks later he came back from Christmas leave married to her.
She cheated on him for a long time, got pregnant from some other guy, the embryo was outside the uterus so she stays married to him for the tricare but lived with the other guy, she had a miscarriage, and finally she convinced him to go AWOL for four days instead of training.
He got moved out of my platoon and kicked out of the army. No idea how he is.
Contacting my parents.
I told this person I went no contact with them and I showed them the legal documents saying that my parents are legally not allowed to contact me but they were still like "but they're your paaaaarrrreeeennnnnnts" and got into contact with them.
After about 4 weeks that person called to tell me that my parents won't stop harassing and threatening them for information about me and I need to help them.
I told them tough luck and the only way to get them to stop is get the cops involved and since its just threats, you have to wait until they come to your house and start damaging you or your property for the cops to actually do anything.
I stopped talking to that person for obvious reasons but from what I hear my parents are still threatening and harassing them a year and a half later.
Keep your wealth a secret.....
I tell people this all the freaking time and they never listen: never tell anybody how much money you have. Doesn't matter if you don't have any money cause no reason to let people know you are broke. But ESPECIALLY if you have money, don't let anybody know. It will only cause you problems.
I tell this to my employees all the time. One of my employees had a huge college fund that her grandparents and parents had been saving for for years. I tell her to keep it a secret and never let anybody know about it.
Of course she tells her girlfriend about it. They move across the country together so my employee can go to college. The girlfriend refuses to get a job or pay for anything because she knows about the money. She proceeded to steal as much money as fast as she could and bails.
This is just one example. Keep your wealth a secret. Money brings out the absolute worst in people.
Nobody listens to me. Ok, I should say sometimes they do, but I swear most of the time they don't. And then it comes back to bite then in the butt.
Told some guy at the horse track that a horse was going to get away from him while he was leading it around. He had him on a super long lead, treating him like a puppy. Sure, you can do that with some there, but this horse wasn't one of them. The horse spooked, kicked him in the gut, took off and ran into a cement barrier, flipping over the top of it. He was banged up some, but he was alright, thankfully. I tried not to laugh at the guy.
Told a different person to not go back on the motocross track when their front tire would randomly lock up (I mean, duh). He did anyway. During the race, it locked up in the air over a decent sized tabletop and he ended up with a broken collarbone, bruised lung, and concussion.
Told my ex that we should strap down the hay. He didn't feel like it, said it would be fine. We get onto the freeway, and sure enough, there goes the hay. Cars are hitting it, running it over, plus losing the cost of it alone was a big enough sting.
And on and on and on....
You're an Adult?excited adult swim GIF by Rick and MortyGiphy
"Hey little bro, please read a room and stop doing your Rick and Morty impression where they make out, complete with tongue slurping and moaning. It's not as funny as you think it is and it makes people uncomfortable. Don't do it at work, for sure."
Two jobs later, he still hasn't learned. Yes, he's an adult.
Up in Flamesflame thrower fire GIFGiphy
I worked for an electrician, doing basic residential type work, and my buddy asked me to look at some electrical problems at his work, since it was on my way home. It was a bar/restaurant that had recently opened after being closed for years. He said one of the waitresses burned herself on one of the outlets in the bar.
The place was huge. It had three electrical panels, and all of them were overstuffed with 'extra' wires, fuses, extension cords, to where you couldn't close the panel doors. I said, "This is a fire hazard, you need to tell the owners to call a licensed electrical contractor immediately". He said the new owners couldn't afford it, but he would tell them. The NEXT NIGHT on my way back from work, the place was engulfed in flames, total loss.
He's so far....
That the people my brother suddenly started dating who demanded he cut every other person he's ever known out of his life were actually a cult and he should run far away. i mean he did move halfway across the world but also he's in a cult.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Let's get existential ... and argumentative.
Because this is internet, people, why are you acting like you don't know what we're here for?
Reddit user Due_Abrocoma6874 asked:
"What exists, but can't be sensed with our 5 senses?"
Which means what was intended as an exploration into the ephemeral took a sudden detour into semantics city.
Because Reddit is Reddit.
"Magnetism, extremely powerful (it saves us from the Sun) but you can't tell it's there unless you have something to tell you. I work in a electric motor shop and have to stick my hand in +4,000 horse power motors with dummy rotors to test them. I'm probably shooting blanks now, my 2nd answer, infertility."
"I think you're confusing the effects of ionizing radiation with magnetism. Strong magnetic fields have absolutely no effects on humans; MRIs are a perfect example. However, working with radioactive materials or near x-ray sources can kill irreplaceable cells in the reproductive organs of both sexes."
"Hence the burning question, 'F*cking Magnets, How Do They Work??' "
"Interesting job, bad answer."
"Look I'm not a 'magnestist' here, just an electrician which I guess could be one of the next closest jobs. But thats like saying you can't use any of our senses to sense gravity."
"Ever seen an object get affected by a magnet? That's sensing magnetism through our sense of 'sight'. Ever held something near a magnet - or even a magnet itself since you can feel the repllent aspect of the force as well? That is sensing magnetism through our sense of 'touch'."
"When anyone cops a belt (sparky for an electric shock) whether it be licking a 9v battery, touching live 240v conductors or even getting struck by lightning; we are feeling the electromagnetically energised positive protons and negative electrons trying to balance themselves out. We literally feel our body experience magnetism."
"Hahaha I did have a laugh at your second answer though that's probably true"
"Actually, both of those are the effects of magnetism. We can't sense magnetic force, just what it causes."
- Mori_564Season 3 Smoking GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy
It's Technically Hearing, But We Get It.
"The difference between an awkward silence and regular silence"
"YES! Have a freebie!"
"I choose not to ever consider silence to be awkward silence and i encourage others to do the same. Yeah it's some corny sigma male sh*t but it's really made my conversations more enjoyable"
"Once knew a guy who was having difficulties with a co-worker. HR finally just told them not to talk to each other. A week later HR spoke to him because the other guy whined about him being 'aggressively silent'. Like wtf?"
"bro speaking facts"
"It is a regular silence until you mention the silence. Then it is an awkward silence."
"Most of reality."
"And yet some brilliant humans have been able to make many of the insensible things visible through their inventions. It’s incredible how many things are known even when we’re unable to detect it without devices."
"I thought this was a dark matter reference at first."
"Most of the universe is dark matter, but we can't see it, touch it, smell it, or interact with it in any way with our senses."
"This is perhaps the best and, simultaneously, most frightening answer."
"If we had 10 more senses and 1000 more IQ points we still wouldn't be able to experience even a fraction of reality."
"Here's a rough list of things that are currently all around you but you don't know is there:"
"Countless air molecules such as oxygen, carbon dioxide, and nitrogen"
"Light (EM spectrum) outside of our range. Radio signals from cell phones, routers, towers, planes, etc. Xrays and gamma rays from upper atmosphere particle interactions and distant stars."
" Billions and billions of neutrinos produced by the sun that penetrate the earth (and your body of course)."
" Radioactive emissions from various natural decaying elements including Carbon"
"14 found in pretty much anything with Carbon (such as your body). Also Potassium such as in Bananas."
" Billions of bacteria and viruses all over everything."
" That Klingon Warbird decloaking off starboard!"
"Nuclear radiation, plus neutrinos - they go right through us."
"Apparently it tastes like metal when there is a lot of radiation tho"
"Astronauts said they could see flashes of light through their closed eyelids, so not all radiation"
"But I do agree with neutrinos"
"Technically you could sense neutrinos since they could hypothetically interact with the liquid inside your eyes, but that happens so rarely and our eyes are so small that statistically it will never happen for anyone ever."
- Moiklefox artists on tumblr GIF by Animation Domination High-DefGiphy
You Have To Imagine The Flavor
"The different flavors of La Croix."
"La Croix flavors aren’t real, you read the can or see the color and it tricks your brain into thinking there is a flavor. I’m convinced this is true and nothing anyone says can change my mind."
"Wait... La Croix has flavors? I thought it was just different can colors"
"Ha! I have a buddy that always said La Croix is like drinking sparkling water while someone on the other end of the house whispers the word grapefruit."
"It tastes like TV static"
- chealey21Soda Water Summer GIF by LaCroix Sparkling WaterGiphy
"Magenta. Your brain makes it up"
"I'll take it if seeing it as grey is the only alternative."
"Crap how many things that we perceive as grey are actually exciting colours? I know certain birds, insects and marine life can see a wider scope of colours than we can."
"I am so confused. I know exactly what magenta is but I googled it and there are no wavelengths? Is life a lie?"
"Technically your brain makes up all colors and sight. I think what you are saying though is that there isn't a specific wavelength range that the brain directly converts to magenta. Actually now that I think of it, I'm not sure what that weird fact is about. I'll have to read more about it."
"Even crazier than Magenta are the impossible colors which can only be perceived temporarily via an optical illusion."
" 'Stygian Blue' is a shade of blue that's darker than black."
" 'Hyperbolic Orange' is a shade of orange that's even more orange than orange."
"The 'self luminous' colors look like brighter-than-white glowing pastels."
"They're kind of trippy."
"Carbon monoxide. Unless dying counts as a sense."
"All gasses except for CO2 are undetectable to the human body. Not just CO"
"Even CO2 is undetectable. It has the EXACT SAME symptoms as every other gas. An impending sense of doom, hallucinations(usually scary and violent) and finally random bouts of unconsciousness getting worse as the volume increases but thats hypoxia as well so..."
"What I mean is that CO2 is the pretty much the only gas that the lungs evolved specifically to reject. A lung full of CO2 is always going to burn and generally feel suffocating although I don't have enough experience with colder co2 vapors to know what those might feel like."
"If it's a lung of PURE CO2 yeah but in the toxic level you won't notice it cause it's not lethal."
"Why is this so far down on the list?"
- alleghenysingersleepy homer simpson GIFGiphy
I Got A Feeling Somebody's Watching Me
"When you’re being watched. You can’t hear, see, touch, taste or smell who or what is watching you. You just kinda… know 👁👁"
"I've heard that your peripheral vision is exceedingly good at detecting eyes. It doesn't tell you exactly where but it alerts that 'being watched' feeling. Technically still sight."
"Typically, the reason for this is because your brain has picked up on something that isnt quite right, wether its silence, or the absence of something thats usually there, but most times, you can't tell what that thing is, but you know something isnt right"
"My buddy went hiking on Vancouver Island a few years ago and told me he had that exact feeling directly behind him. Turned around and a mountain lion was staring at him from a distance."
"You can you just don't know you can. You as a being are too focused on random bullshit than on surviving its why we have a part of the brain DEDICATED TO THREAT DETECTION. It's called your subconscious or Instincts. Instincts are useful because they give you that gut feeling and deal with your reflexes. If you've ever gotten into a fight and grabbed a rock or something without thinking about it it was Instincts. If you've ever felt paranoid or afraid of the dark despite being 30 years old and having gotten over it that's Instincts. If you've ever looked at a ledge and thought about jumping off that's Instincts telling you have terrifyingly bad an idea that is(something to do with monkey brain and judging distances you can fall from safely)"
- MutedAd7206Interested George Clooney GIFGiphy
"Depends what you mean by "sensed". If I look at a video feed from a satellite at the far end of the Moon, am I seeing the far end of the Moon? If I look at a picture of distant galaxies imaged in infrared, watch a vapor trail in a particles experiment, listen to a sonification of data, feel a building tremble in an earthquake, do I sense these existing things?"
"What is allowed to be between myself and the existing 'thing', to still call it sensing? Do the instruments have to be part of my body? What about glasses? Implanted lenses? Hearing aids? Skin grafts?"
"Regardless of your answer, the only thing I would say with some certainty exists, but cannot be sensed, is the future (some future) because the laws of physics forbid time travel in that direction.."
"I would argue that time in that sense doesn’t even really count as existing. It’s more of an abstraction or summary of the interaction between existent things in space (spacetime would be a better way to think about it)."
"Not one thing can be said to exist without the claim being dependent on the senses."
Not Your Typical Wave
"Most radio waves"
"More like the entire electromagnetic spectrum apart from visible light and infrared."
"Up to a certain amplitude but eventually … cooked 😂"
"Most light aka most of the electromagnetic spectrum. In fact we can't sense any radio waves at all, not with our human senses anyway, as the OP asked."
"I was going to say WiFi, but that is also an electromagnet wave."
Now that you've argued your way through some Redditors thoughts, let's argue more in the comments.
What do you know exists even though you can't exactly perceive it?
Life is full of boring things.
Life is full of uninteresting things.
So... if life full?
That's a question for another time.
Let's focus on the things that leave us bored to tears.
Or numb with no feeling at all.
You ever wonder how people get so super involved and jazzed about some stuff and you look at it and all you can do is yawn?
That's our topic.
Redditorroscatorossowanted to hear about what things we all can live without.
"What's something you have ZERO interest in?"
I have a long list of having zero interest in things. Give me a few more points.
"Extending my car’s warranty."
"We have messaged you about your car's extended warranty."
Ashamed-Help-6662Chopping Video Game GIFGiphy
"All pyramid schemes should get stuffed."
"At one point my boss was hocking Herbalife and young living essential oils on the side of the business, it was a blast trying to take a sick day because she had the cure for everything."
"Commercial advertisements interrupting what I’m doing."
"Let's talk about commercial ads in cinemas. I stopped going to a certain cinema (The Space chain, in Italy) for this reason. Tickets are more expensive than the family owned cinema, and before the movie starts you have at least 30 minutes of ads."
"Unless you book online, they don't allow you in if the 'movie' has started. Online bookers can go in until 30 minutes after the booked time. For some reason, my friends love it. I deeply hate it. People usually run out of popcorn before the movie starts. The last time I went there, I paid 12.50€ for a movie that had to start at 22:30, and it started at 23:20. Never again."
"Raid shadow legends."
"I did actually download it. Played it for like 5 minutes, there was very little in the way of strategy or anything and it kept giving me new 'tasks.' Eventually I discovered a 'Auto fight' button that would literally play the game for you requiring 0 input from you. I uninstalled it."
"Shows about d**chebags dating on some island."
Kramer1812Heart Andre GIF by LoveIslandUSAGiphy
I still can't believe people get invested in those shows.
"Literally whatever my neighbor wants to talk about, everyday."
maketesSpongebob Squarepants Reaction GIF by NickelodeonGiphy
"Gender reveal parties. We're gonna find out soon enough."
"Somebody I worked with had a cringy one of these at our team meeting, after talking shop about very serious issues in suits and ties etc. At the end my manager was like 'ok so now we have a special moment where Nadine is going to reveal to us the gender of her baby.' She got up excitedly in front revealing a big box covered in glitter and s**t, slowly cut a ribbon and balloon popped out with 'it's a boy' on it. We just all sat there and awkwardly clapped like we cared."
"Praising and defending corrupt politicians like a freaking God."
"Corrupt politicians, more like ANY politician. I find it so strange seeing people idolise and put their political leaders on these untouchable pedestals while they crap on them, none of them care about anything other than their agenda and their wallets."
"I've recently been seeing a clickbait on my social media that says, 'Did Anne Frank have white privilege? The internet is up in arms...' or something like that. I cannot even describe the feeling of shut the heeeeellll up, and total exhaustion that that question gives me."
Not a Thing
"Celebrities/ Influencer Culture."
"I really hate the term 'influencer.' It just sounds so pompous and is mostly only used by people who want to feel more relevant than they actually are."
CC_KeyesSocial Media Reaction GIF by Acorn TVGiphy
I have less than zero interest in all of this.
The times do change fast don't they? Everything we think we'll know about the future is usually false.
How much of history is littered with things we thought we'd never be able to do without?
Now we watch movies in our palms. (Instead of theaters.) We send millions of dollars through the air. (Instead of withdrawing in person, or a check.) And we no longer need pennies. (Basically)
Who would have thought?
These were all going to be life essentials.
But generation by generation, the obsolescence takes over.
RedditorVictorPumpensteinwanted to talk about what truths were hidden until it was too late for each group as we aged.
"What is the biggest lie sold to your generation?"
Beepers. I was told my beeper would be forever. Alas...
You Still Here?
"Gen X-er here... we were told that the boomers would eventually retire. Still waiting for that to happen while rapidly approaching retirement age myself."
drsfmdSeth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"Don’t act up in class Johnny, It will go on your PERMANENT RECORD!!"
"I worked in records for a public school board many years ago. The only thing colleges ever requested was transcripts and IEPs if a student had one. However, the police would request full disciplinary records of someone was going to be hired. And unless a student had a disciplinary hearing at some point, most records other than transcripts are destroyed after 7 years."
"The war on drugs."
"Poverty and terror won theirs, too. Turns out, declaring war on a concept without attacking the societal roots of the problem is just a way to funnel more money into the military-industrial complex."
"Shout out to pharmaceutical companies for winning the war on drugs."
instead of cardboard...
"Plastic recycling. I remember when grocery stores went from paper bags to plastic because 'they're recyclable!' Literally everything else started coming wrapped in a ton of plastic (instead of cardboard) because it was recyclable. Single use plastics were great, because we'd just recycle the plastic, and use it forever! Turns out, it was just cheaper, and recycling had nothing to do with it. Most of that plastic can't be recycled anyway."
"Fat is bad, sugar is good."
"This is why America has an obesity epidemic. Even now, older generations tout the health benefits of low fat things, without bothering to look at sugar contents. High sugar processed foods that happen to be low in fat destroyed multiple generations. Thankfully I think Gen Z might be the turnaround. Older generations are pretty messed up."
"Medicare and social security will protect you. Based on how things are going, anyone with 30 years or more before retirement better have strong backup plans."
iteracoMedicine Pills GIF by FergieGiphy
Oh Medicare and social security. What. A. Disaster. We are in trouble.
"You will always have to write in cursive."
"I hated those cursive books and being 10 and still couldn't figure it out. My sister a year behind me never had to write cursive. I firmly believe my year was the last year to deal with cursive. This was back in 2012-2013."
chonkettesealtake notes GIF by US National ArchivesGiphy
"Climb the corporate ladder."
"It's not a ladder, it's a pyramid. Only one person can be CEO, a handful can be executives, a bigger clump can be in some form of middle management, but the majority will always be 'individual contributors' - what an amazingly corporate term."
"You're often better off with an in-demand skill set that you can shop from company to company. Unless you enjoy fighting and scrabbling and climbing over people to keep getting promoted. Sure, you may have crappy bosses, but even the CEO has to go in front of the board and be told everything that's going wrong."
“If you don’t go to college, you’ll die broke and alone on the street.”
"I wish i hadn't been pushed so hard to go to Uni at 18. I wasn't ready yet and i didn't know what I wanted to do with my life yet. Asking a 16 year old what degree and vocation he wants is just a bad way of doing it!"
"My principal in high school was upset at me because I wasn't going to college. He told me multiple times that if I don't, then I am just throwing away my intelligence. I never went to college because it just sounded miserable and expensive. I worked a few different jobs after high school and learned a lot then started my own business. Glad I never went to college."
"Work hard for your company and they will take care of you."
whatintheactualfethSeason 1 Lol GIF by NBCGiphy
So much changes over each generation. How will we ever learn?
In this day and age of sexual freedom and experimentation, why would you cheat?
It makes absolutely no sense.
Unless, the act itself is part of the fun.
No matter your decision, let's pinpoint the moment we know we're heading down that path.
Everybody can name the times you feel it in your gut.
You know it's crossed a line.
Redditorcrabpinchingmyanuswanted to hear about the moments when we all begin to fall short of fidelity.
"Redditors, where does cheating in a relationship start for you?"
You always know when it's wrong. At least I always did. That's why is called cheating.
"The sneaking around. The second you start plotting to do something behind my back. You're violating the trust of the relationship."
WarkitzSheila Canning Love GIF by Neighbours (Official TV Show account)Giphy
"Honestly it's about intentions more than anything. If my SO started pursuing someone romantically that's cheating - doesn't matter if it's lovey dovey texting or f**king. If my SO was at a party and a drunk person kissed him suddenly against his wishes, that's not cheating."
"At the end of the day it comes down to them wanting to be with another person and they aren't being honest about it. The polite thing to do, even though it's painful and hard and sad, is to break up. Breaking up is never crappier than cheating."
"If you would be unwilling to tell your partner about an interaction, then it's probably time to start thinking about what you're doing."
"Yeah I think the two basic litmus tests are..."
"1- Would you tell them/do it in front of them?"
"2- Would you be okay with it if they did the same thing?"
"If the answer is yes to both, it’s probably fine. If it’s no to either, then at minimum you’re on dangerous ground."
"It depends on what each couple would consider to be off limits. A good guide is if you're doing something you would hide from your partner or wouldn't do it if they were in the room with you, then that's cheating. It can range from having sex with someone else, to simply flirting."
"Lies. It always starts with lies. Be it texts or snaps, if one of us have to lie or hide, it's wrong and should not happen."
notyourusualladyA Lie Is A LieGiphy
It's always a lie in the beginning. Don't lie... it's a Commandment.
"If you wouldn't want your partner to know, it's cheating. I wouldn't flirt with someone else in front of my partner, so I don't flirt with people when he's not around either."
kellogg888Pondering Anthony Anderson GIF by BETGiphy
"As cheesy as it sounds, it starts with your motive, intention, and conscience. I think there's a clear cut difference between physical cheating and mental/emotional cheating, but it all relates to your honest motive, intention, and conscience. For example, there isn't anything inherently wrong with texting with another person if you are married or dating."
"But if you know in your heart that you are texting or engaging in conversation that makes you feel guilty or it would make your partner upset, you may be doing something wrong, even if you technically did not cheat. If at any point you are justifying your actions or defending your actions/feelings/thoughts from a technical perspective, you may be at the start of doing something wrong."
"Cheating starts at lying, even by omission. I am okay with private conversations, meeting people she wants to meet, going away on business trips or going out and coming back late at night. But lying to me about it or about what happened? Or simply not telling me something I don't want to hear? That's cheating."
"'I will go out tonight, to see people you don't know and talk about things you don't care about': we are in the clear, it is fine."
"'I saw X and Y last night at their place': if I know for sure that it is not true, then there is some cheating involved."
"It only works if you are not a creep, or even jealous. There needs to be mutual trust and respect. When trust and respect are gone, the relationship is gone too."
"The intent. For me, an ex of mine that would later cheat on me started a tinder profile in which she claimed she "just wanted to find friends" and she certainly found quite a few of them. Obviously, she didn't just want friends. It could be as small as reaching out to an ex to say happy birthday, but most people have the intent to do something well before it is executed."
"If there’s a grey area, it’s cheating. If you know they will be upset, it’s cheating. If you have to hide it/lie/omit details. It’s cheating."
SufficientBug5598Jennifer Aniston Friends GIFGiphy
There is never a good reason to cheat. Once you know it's starting... fess up.