People Break Down Which Small Inconveniences They Would Wish On Their Worst Enemies
We would never wish death upon our enemies. Right?
Well...let's pretend we wouldn't. And instead we would wish that they constantly stub their pinky toe as they quickly round a corner in their house, or that they can never find their keys when they're running late.
That will surely irritate them enough in payback for all the things they've done to us.
u/twitch870 asked Reddit:
What's a small inconvenience curse that would drive somebody insane?
Here were some of those responses.
Beep...Beep...Beeeeeep
A friend of mine bought a really simple yet devilish device. It was an annoying piezo buzzer attached to a timer that went of randomly anywhere between 30 seconds and like an hour apart. So it would beep in the managers office the manager would eventually get annoyed but have trouble tracking it down because it was so random in the time interval. He'd get up look around eventually give up and it would beep again. It was the BEST week of work ever. The crew lounge looked across the bay at the office so we all got a good laugh. Especially once the cursing started
Teh Realness
-types teh
-backspaces to fix it to write "the"
-accidentally types teh again
-gets stuck in an endless loop
We Call It...Sneezergatory
Every time they want to sneeze, they get stuck in that "limbo" mode for an extra long time where the sneeze is right there about to come out, but it won't.
Sometimes for seconds, sometimes for minutes.
Haha Wish This Didn't Happen To Me So Often
At random intervals into a nice hot shower, the water will go ice cold. Does not matter where they shower. It always happens at least once.
my apartment building was built in the 30s. this is my every shower. sometimes it goes boiling hot.
Mine goes boiling hot if the apartment above me flushes their toilet. My rental manager claims there is no way that can happen. But it only happens when they flush, so it definitely is that. And those @ssholes above me do it on purpose now. They like hearing us scream. Now I turn on the shower and wait to hear if they go into the bathroom and flush, then wait for the water to go back to normal before I'll get in.
A Prayer For Wet Socks
Ah!
Damn!
Wet socks...
Such a nuisance.
Oh, how it soaks deeply!
Those dark, cold waters do travel so strongly.
I fear that once my sock has soaked so, I may nary recover.
Oh, cruel fate and my cursed holed boot, why have you betrayed this poor fool whose only crime was to walk?!
Wretched fool am I indeed to place my naive trust in earthly works of man when the Gods, so twisted in their treatment of mankind, see fit to punish us, so weak, so completely!
A puddle, cold and deep, dark and uncaring, such a vicious, wicked thing, stands silently on this cobbled road lying in wait for a moment in humanity's weakness perchance that a man such as I to step haphazardly in so that it may cling and climb through my woolen fibers and corrupt my gentle flesh!
My gentle being cries out in shock and terror, and my body, on its own volition, recoils as the icy embrace of this cursed infliction does travel so deftly from my sorry, sodden foot up my leg through channels unknown and takes firm roots in my soul so that is may proliferate this cruel corruption and waiver my misplaced faith so that now I see all things holy and good in this world are but a farce, a sadistic joke played by Gods that care not for me!
As the wetness grips me like the sharp clutch of some large, relentless raptor fit on rendering the sweet flesh of a helpless, squirming babe such as I, I curse the Gods and beings that I, we, had once thought so holy, with divine wisdom, that now I see, for this cold, dark ripple has opened my eyes, that they seek to destroy this world, what little good there is left in it...
And treat us so insignificantly as if my soul, so easily manipulated, carries not an ounce of weight with which to purchase any right to be, to exist, to matter in this cosmos, and I hear laughing, their twisted chortling, rattling, mocking deep in my brain, and I turn my eyes inward hoping, though so lowly I may be, that I may see these Gods and look upon their wicked forms!
Oh please, oh please, oh please, I must ask, I must know the answers as why me and why like this have you, you great beings, you powerful Gods and forces above all, beyond all, why have you chosen me, because it is quite clear to see, even with these clouded, mortal eyes, that you know me as nothing but a pathetic useless thing for you to bat at like a cat with a mouse, nay, a cat a mouse does not do proper comparison for thee, you great things, you incredibly powerful things, are far much more than a cat and I am far much less than a mouse and through the misery of this coldness...
this aching dampness, creeping, crawling, chilling, rooting up my pale, lifeless leg, my useless leg and my accursed shoe, this holed boot, you great things, an ancient wisdom, you have revealed a world beyond, a world not meant for others, a world I, only just now, can even slightly strain my mind to comprehend and you wanted me to see, to see the unseen, to feel new sensations the likes of which any other mere man or woman shall ne'er be fit to feel, to touch, to be, and I should thank thee, even though I am more miserable, cold, wet, clammy, and damp than I should have ever thought possible, now this reality means nothing.
I shall fall to my knees a pray to you, if you'll have me, if you'll take me, a pathetic fool of a man, dumb to your world, blind to the true world of thee, whose errant stepping landed his imprudent foot, with boot and sock fully submerged in a puddle, a cold and unforgiving puddle, and the cold waters, placed by thee, of course.
I see, I see, I see, and I know that now, the cold waters, the rushing chill soaking my being, my lowly mortal form, myself not fit to exist in the same reality as thee, my great gods, my glorious, powerful rulers of my soul, my body, my mind, the cosmos and beyond, you've shown me, generously of course, of course, your world, though I admittedly cannot fully comprehend it as feebleminded as I am compared to the brilliant, infinite knowledge of all things past, present, future, dreaming, waking, unconscious, subconscious, superconscious, radiant, powerful all knowingness of all these and more, so much, so much more than I can ever know even with one thousand lifetimes, and you've reached through that puddle, and plucked my soul from the plane, broke the chains on my mind, of this fool's dream, and let me be free to gaze, not with eyes...
These useless eyes, these lying horrid things that should be gouged clean from my skull, yes, clean holes to expose my mind, my brain, that thing which I feel your hands, your reach, your presence on me, and yes, I shall use these wretched hands, these primitive tools of a being that is no more to you than an insect is to I, yet to call myself an insect is to think too highly of myself, for your immense omnipresence far exceeds anything, everything, and the fear, this puddle in which you placed, destined for my foot to fall so squarely into, has become the source of so much fear because now my innocence has gone, my ignorance dissolved away, my infinite dreams and endless, abyssal nightmares made far more real than I could have ever believed possible and it is all thanks to your work with the puddle, whether or not you even care about me, my existence, or anything at all.
Stop Drop Or Go?
Every stop light they approach turns red before they can make it through the intersection.
Who put this curse on my mom, because she hits all reds. And then there's me. Idk if there was a misfire on that curse because as I approach the intersection it turns yellow, and there is like, .5 seconds to make a decision to go through or stop. 80% of the time I get a yellow.
Sorry I'm Not Here Right Now, I'm Walking Into Spiderwebs
Someone asked a similar question yesterday-about harmless haunting. I didn't respond to that, but I offer this:
Unseen spider webs.
I used to hike a lot back when I was younger and nothing drove me crazier than walking into an unseen spider web on the trail. It's not just the annoying fact that you now have spider silk all over and around you, but it's also how ridiculous you look to others when you get tangled up in it. You look like an absolute dipsh!t- arms flailing, spitting stuff out of your mouth, your eyes all squinted shut-it's awful.
But to have this all over your home, or climbing into your car each time you have to go somewhere-this would drive a person completely bonkers, I think.
At least it would me. I'd just go nuts.
Gosh Darn It
Every time they pick up an object, they drop it. The object doesn't break, and they don't drop it again after picking it up, just the initial time.
I figured I'd add that "not breaking" doesn't apply to objects that would definitely break. Just that objects breaking isn't specifically part of the curse. The curse also only applies to inanimate objects.
EwwWwWwW
Every time they drink a liquid it immediately becomes room temperature.
Trying to drink a hot cup of coffee in the morning? BAM! Room temperature. Want to enjoy an ice cold beer on a hot summer day? NOPE! that beer is warm and foamy.
The Ultimate Curse
A curse that does nothing.
They hear a voice say they're cursed, and it doesn't do anything. That way they spend all of their time worrying about what the curse could be until they eventually cause their own problems and blame it on the curse.
We've all found ourselves at a crossroads of some kind at one point in our life, which has resulted in our needing to make a hasty decision.
Without much time to think, we often feel the need to ignore logic, and simply go with our gut.
Generally speaking, these decisions aren't terribly consequential, even if we might come across some new information down the line which makes us feel better about our decision.
In some cases however, making a decision based purely on our instincts may have proven to be a life saving situation.
In spite of the fact that the life or death stakes were completely oblivious to us at the time.
"What’s a time where trusting your gut quite literally saved your life?"
Hidden By Grass
"I almost drove through a big patch of tall grass on my dirt bike just for fun, but at the last second hit the brakes and turned around."
"Didn't know why."
"Next time I went there, turns out there's a 75 foot cliff over a river right behind it that I would have just flew off at top speed."
"Because of the scenery, you couldn't tell at all looking head on to it."
"I still don't know what made me stop back then."- Quiet_Stranger_5622
Always Safety First
"I was working in the sales office at an engineering company."
"I was asked to record the serial numbers off a stack of large steel plates on the shop floor."
"I had to get someone with crane operating experience to lift the top plate so I could read the one underneath."
"The guy lifted it directly upwards about 6ft."
"I was just about to lean underneath the plate when a little voice inside my head said 'don't do that mate, get him to move the overhead plate to one side'."
"Just as I thought that, the clamp holding the plate failed and it fell to the ground, just in front of me.'
"It must've weighed about a tonne."
'If it'd fallen on my head, I'd have been killed instantly."- dineramallama
Hanging With The Wrong Crowd
"My GF met up with a work friend at a bar."
"This girl was with a guy who gave me seriously bad vibes."
"He was fake friendly but his eyes were crazy."
"My GF didn't see it."
"I wasn't having it."
"I told her I was leaving, and she really needed to come."
"We fought, I left, she came running after."
"Next morning, we find out the guy stabbed someone in the chest and killed the guy."
"I straight up said I told you so."
"He was f*cking crazy."
"Gfs friend spent the night in holding too."
"I don't know if it saved my life but it saved me one helluva bad time."- S_204
Active Robbery
"My boyfriend at the time and I were house sitting for his uncle."
"My boyfriend was at work and I was bathing our son before bed."
"I had the bathroom window (facing the backyard) very slightly cracked, and heard a cough from outside."
"This house was in a residential neighborhood so it could have been a neighbor, but I suddenly felt anxious and scared and something told me to go make sure the back door was locked."
"I left my two year old son alone in a towel in the bathroom and ran to the back door."
"As i placed my hand on the doorknob locking it, I came face to face with someone through the glass, who had his hand on the outside doorknob."
"He started pounding on the door and juggling the doorknob saying he was looking for someone and i just told him no, they're not here."
"He kept jiggling the doorknob and i ran to my son and grabbed my cell phone to call for help."
"Remember Im house sitting tho, and this was in 2004/2005 when they had those flip open phones, not a smart phone where you can just look at a map."
"So i had no idea what the address was, or where the house phone was."
"Anyways, i call 911 from the bathroom on my cell, while hearing loud pounding on the back door."
"The dispatchers tells me to find a house phone, piece of mail anything with address."
"I locate the house phone and call 911 from that. so have no idea how police got there so quickly, but just as I hear the back door glass break, the guy on the phone tells me to cover my sons head with a blanket and run out the front door into the backseat of the police car."
"I ran out the front door and saw 6 or more police cars all with guns drawn and straight into the waiting cruiser."
"After they arrested the guy, they ask me if the machete on the back porch belonged to the owners of the house."
"The guy had a machete and had I not trusted my gut that the cough sounded a little to close, and to check the back door, he would've walked right into an unlocked house to a 19 year old female and her young son alone."
"Turns out he had been robbing houses and had a backpack full of stolen things, and was high on meth."
"Anyways, super glad so followed my gut on that one."- Liketheweatherpnw
Listening To Nature
"One time I was hiking after a storm and my intuition told me to freeze."
"I listened and a large tree just fell down across the trail in front of me, right where I would have been if I didn't stop."- LogicalFallacyCat
Home Alone And Feeling Uneasy...
"I had a sense something was wrong in my house but no reason why."
"I went around looking but couldn’t find anything wrong or anyone in there."
"Felt so freaked I stayed at a friends place."
"Ended up being a carbon monoxide leak."
"Could’ve saved my life."- Responsible-Bet-7485
Questioning Unsafe Work Conditions
"Not necessarily saved my life, but saved me from getting seriously hurt."
"I was a temp worker at a warehouse, worst 9 months of my life, I wanted to die."
"One day, my boss who had no training on the forklift told me to climb up on a ladder and move something out of the way of the forklift, and my gut said 'tell her to turn the forklift off first' so I did."
"She scoffed and said it was unnecessary so she got this other guy to do it because I was being 'difficult'."
"Well, she moved the fork up and smashed his fingers against the ceiling breaking every finger on his hand besides his thumb."
"The badass just went 'ow!' and was like eh, bout time i retire anyways, huh?"
"He was like 70."- xarthos
When In Doubt, See A Doctor
"Extreme pain went to ER."
"Gangrenous appendicitis."
"Could have died."
"Thanks gut."- SternLecture
If You Can't Trust Your Gut, You Can At Least Trust Your Dog
"I had gotten my first black lab."
"He was about 10 months old when we went to a local park early in the morning to walk the trails."
"We had just finished a long trail and were resting."
"I was sitting on a bench."
"My dog's hair stood up and he started to growl."
"When I looked up, I saw a man walking towards me."
"His eyes didn't look right."
"I knew he was high."
"When my dog growled, he stopped."
"He gave a smirky smile and asked if my dog would bite."
"I told him he definitely would if the guy came any closer."
"He hesitated for a moment, and then he turned and walked away."
"To this day I am certain he meant to harm me."
"If I hadn't trusted my dog, I hate to think what would have happened."
"I gave him lots of hugs and treats that day."
"He died many years ago, but I think of him often."
"And I believe that when I cross over, he will be there waiting for me."
"He was the best dog I ever had."
"I still love and miss him greatly."- angelangelica16
It's never a fun feeling when you have to make a decision without any real time to think.
But if your gut is steering you in one direction, it's probably the right thing o head that way.
As sometimes there's nothing you can trust more than the hairs on the back of your neck.
There is no feeling more frustrating than saving up for a fancy, expensive dinner at a restaurant everyone's been talking about, which you had to book months in advance, only to sit down to a very underwhelming meal.
What makes this all the more infuriating, is that there was absolutely nothing to suggest that this might happen, as the five star yelp reviews and sky-high prices suggested you were in for a treat.
Thankfully, there can be signs that certain restaurants aren't worth spending your money at.
Be it a grungy facade, a menu that seems a little too eclectic, or a less than welcoming greeting from a host, sometimes it's clear that you're bound to have a much better meal at your local greasy spoon than you are at certain restaurants.
"What is a Red Flag that you are in a bad restaurant?"
When They Just Can't Be Bothered...
"The restaurant isn't even busy but they take ages to serve you, and when they finally do they seem reluctant."- peculiar-pirate
coffee pouring GIF by South Park GiphyQuality Over Quantity
"Long menu."
"Pages and pages of food that doesn’t really make sense or go together."- blackaubreyplaza
"Sushi, pizza, AND burritos are ALL on the menu."- financialfreeabroad
Lets Eat Reaction GIF by Schitt's CreekLack Of Authenticity
"Ethnic restaurant with no customers of that ethnicity in a town with a large population of that ethnicity."- baronvonbee
Don't Be Fooled By It's Appearance
"I've eaten at ratholes with amazing food and had terrible food at nice steakhouses, both can have people cooking for minimum wage and bad management."
"If it's a small ethnic restaurant and you see kids doing homework at one of the tables; try the food, it's always good."-Dizzy-Particular-258
It's All About The Food
"It’s sometimes difficult to tell until you try the food."
"There’s a restaurant in my town that is consistently crowded."
"Fairly expensive."
"My wife and I went there and waited a few minutes for a table."
"Restaurant was dirty, food tasted stale, and my wife happened to walk by the kitchen and see like 6 microwaves on a table heating stuff up."- jonahvsthewhale
kitchen nightmares amy GIF by Global EntertainmentGiphyOne Unwanted Guest
"The very moment Gordon Ramsay appears and calls the employees f*cking donkeys."- Ch*ist_Hater666
When The Ambiance Is Anything But Romantic
"Bad lighting or sticky tables."- trashbagbum
"Dirty floor, if they can’t keep the floor clean, they aren’t cleaning the important stuff."- lovelynutz
dirty spongebob squarepants GIF"Oh, Sorry We're Out..."
"Whatever is on the menu 60% is not available."- XqueezeMePlease
Whether Or Not It's The Food You're Smelling...
"Smells bad."- Louis-grabbing-pills
Roaches Check In...
"In university I went out with some friends and they decided to go to mid-priced restaurant before we caught a film."
"I was really broke so I feigned not being hungry to excuse the fact that I couldn't order anything."
"As we were hanging out I noticed a cockroach crawl onto the table and quickly scurry out of sight."
"That is one of the few times I was happy to be poor."- gildorratner
"If you smell freshly popped popcorn, but they don't serve popcorn, they have a cockroach infestation."
"The smell is the result of a potent insecticide and dead roaches."- Goatmanthealien
place cockroaches GIFGiphyMany restaurants are not worth their expensive prices.
While others aren't even worth a single second of your time.
Thankfully, those can be fairly easy to spot.
As we get older, cars become less of something that gets us from point A to point B and more of a necessity.
Not only do we need to use cars to get from one place to another, but they also double as storage spaces, private places, and, in the worst of cases, shelter.
Because of their importance in our lives, it's good to have a few things tin your car to keep you prepared. When I got my first car, my mom stocked it with the usual supplies: jumper cables, ice scraper, spare tire, and a roll of quarters. She also added a blanket, a powerful flashlight, and a knife.
While I've never needed to the knife, I was glad to know it was there, and the other items have all come in handy.
I also like to put a change of clothes in my car. You never know when someone will cut you off in the road, making you spill coffee all over your white blouse.
Redditors know there are other important things to always keep in your car, and are ready to share.
It all started when Redditor Ace-Venturaa asked:
"What’s one item everyone should have in their car?"
Sick Bag
"A barf bucket. Had my dog and my kid both puke in my car. Darn dog couldn't hold the bucket."
– boegsppp
Break Out
"And a small fire extinguisher, and one of those things for breaking windows in case of an accident and the doors don’t open."
– Quick-Oil-5259
"Like, a small fire extinguisher?"
– anon10122333
Safety First...And Always
"First aid kit"
– ApolloApproaches
"In Germany it is required to have a first aid kit, reflective triangles, and reflective vests in every car"
– britishbrick
Super Important
"Some kind of disposable paper like a napkin, kleenex, baby wipes, even an old shop towel. Nothing worse than needing to blow your nose in your car and you have nothing at all to use."
– sbourwest
"A stack of chipotle napkins"
– Avocadofarmer32
"Everyone should have somewhere in their car to store some of that unnecessary amount of napkins fast food places give us."
– AloyTheN0ra
Capture The Moments
"Seriously, a dashcam."
– Sparksman91
"True. Half of having insurance is.. proof."
– A40
"At this point I'm surprised they're not included by manufacturer, or insurance companies don't just pay for them. Even if they're vampires who would never pay a cent they aren't forced to, simply removing all the headache involved in this stuff has to be worth it on their end."
– SigmaBallsLol
"Person backs into your car. Claims you hit them. Dash cam settles it."
"Person claims you ran a red light (when they did), and that's why there was a crash. Dash cam settles it."
"Etc."
"Insurance believes liars the same as honest people - unless there is evidence. Like a dash cam record."
"I bought mine used, $15, two years ago. Once a month or so I check that it's still working. Insurance insurance, and maybe someday it'll see a bigfoot, or a meteor..."
– A40
Back On The Road
"Jumper cables"
– wildling-woman
"Better yet a portable jump starter battery (like the NOCO boost). Those things are amazing. They hold a charge for months in blazing hot or freezing cold temps. They are the size of a brick. And best of all since they attach to the dead battery directly, you don't have to hope your jumper cables are long enough. They also have usb plugs to charge a phone or tablet."
– Tuesday2017
Let There Be Light
"Flash light. They are cheap can be stored for years and take up little space.,It's better to have one and not need it than need one and not have it."
– Euphoric-Beat-7206
"I keep a headlamp instead of a flashlight. That way I can have both hands if I need to change a tire or something."
– Local-Finance8389
Cozy And Warm
"A blanket. Shock from a traumatic injury can cause a sharp drop in body temperature."
– No_Library_5120
"After my bad wreck a few years back, I was in shock and I remember I felt so cold. I had no blanket in my car, nor did anyone else. It was middle of summer in the southern US. I felt like it was winter"
– Katsu_39
Money, Money, Money
"Emergency cash, I keep like $40 usd"
– Dudebrohoe
"If you're going on a road trip, stash enough cash to pay for gas to get back. If you lose your wallet you can still get home."
– banjowashisnamo
"That's a good one. Especially if you lost wallet and phone."
– lolben1
Always
"A licensed competent driver."
– Improvedandconfused
"And a can of pepper spray to take care of annoying backseat drivers."
– sleepyJoesBidet
Make A List
"1- tourniquet. Preferably one inside of a good first aid kid."
"2- glass breaker. In the unlikely event you get stuck in the car as it’s going underwater, a glass breaker / seatbelt cutter combo tool can get you out safely. If you have electric windows, a tiny amount of water can disable the electronic door locks and window buttons, a spring loaded glass breaker will make short work of it. Even if you don’t have a specialized spring loaded glass breaker, something that comes to a sharp point (like a screw driver) that can be used to break the glass out can save your life."
"3- emergency blanket. The Mylar ones that look like aluminum foil cost like 2-3 dollars. If your car breaks down and it’s snowing out, you can use it to stay warm far longer than just running the heater in the car will last. The shiny foil looking side reflects your body heat back at you, and you can use it to trap heat from the car around your body core. The more expensive ones are a little better and less likely to rip, but even the cheap ones are better than nothing. Even if you don’t get an emergency blanket, a normal quilt in the trunk isn’t a bad idea either."
"4- a lighter. A lot of cars come without cigarette lighters now apparently. In an emergency you could try rigging something up using your car battery to start a fire to either stay warm or signal someone. Or you could just flick a bic. Lighters cost 50 cents. It’s not a big investment and it might save your life."
"5- flashlight. This one requires a little more maintenance than everything else I said, as you’ll have to change the batteries every once in a while even if you don’t use it. A cheap 1-2$ LED flashlight can help immensely in a lot of situations. From having a flat and needing to see to change it to locking yourself out of your house, or needing to signal someone for help so you don’t get hit on a highway, or needing to look for a key you drop that bounces under the car or into a ditch. This one can be as simple as a keychain flashlight you put on the car keys. Headlamp is even better because you can either be hands free or use it like a normal flashlight if need be."
– PerInception
Laughing At Clouds
"an umbrella"
– KermitMadMan
"I was beginning to think I didn’t have anything on these lists and finally found one lol"
– Joshifi3d
Absolutely
"I haven't seen anybody mention this but sunglasses. You really don't want to be caught with the full blast of the sun in your eyes while you're driving. It can seriously blind you for long enough for an accident to happen"
– advancedwarlord
I have to go restock my car!
One morning at work, I was having a conversation with a co-worker. The subject was something we had discussed before: me, freaking out about possibly being let go since I was the last one hired and many businesses hadn't recovered the losses they suffered due to COVID.
My co-worker, who had previously just listened to me and offered platitudes, gave me some real advice that morning. The advice had come straight from her therapist.
"Think about your worry and think about if there is evidence to support that worry. If not, you shouldn't worry."
It seems simple, but it really helped me. While many businesses didn't recover, the company I worked for had, meaning there was no reason to worry about my job -- unless, of course, I spent so much time fretting over getting fired that my output suffered.
In an age where mental health is so important, therapists can really help with coping mechanisms, advice, and even your general outlook on life. Redditors know this is true and are ready to share some of the most valuable lessons they've learned in therapy.
It all started when Redditor figinjosejospe asked:
"What's the most valuable thing you’ve learned from therapy?"
Just Walk Away
"Sometimes it has to be YOU who needs to walk away from them. This an advice that was given to me when I had a toxic friendship that was draining me for years."
– JennFoogle
"I learned this lesson two years ago, and I am still struggling with it every day. I had a friend who is an alcoholic and a drug addict but a functional member of society. He would ALWAYS use me as an excuse by saying I am a bad influence on him when it was ALWAYS him doing drugs and just generally being a POS."
"One day he decided to try and sleep with my then spouse in my bed, I caught him, I did not immediately confront them about it but when I did she dumped me because she did not want to hurt his family..."
"Some people just need to go"
– Then_Channel_3234
"I cut off a close friend a few years ago. Long story, but I’m happy I did. Feels like I just took a huge dump."
– Scottland83
The Real Me
"No one sees the version of you that you see of yourself."
– Bazooka_Antics
"Very true! It's one of those "we are our own worst critic" situations. The way I see myself and the way I'm described by others seems dramatically different"
"Good pick!"
– appleparkfive
Just Say No
"I can say, "No" to people who won't accept a no. (100 ways to say "No" was a"homework" assignment.)"
– AQuietMan
"Additionally, "No." is a complete sentence."
"You don't have to justify no."
– coniferous-1
You Fix You
"For me, therapy taught me that my personal issues were my responsibility to fix. Blaming others accomplishes nothing. To improve, you have to take responsibility for things in your control."
– nick_otis
"This so much this! Mine told me “it’s not your fault that these things happened to you but it is your responsibility to make sure you don’t take it out on others”"
– melkyyyy
We Accept The Love We Think We Deserve
"I learned that I don’t have to bend over backwards to accommodate everyone around me at all times. I think I kind of was a pushover before and now I’m getting better at setting boundaries and standing up for myself. Not everyone in my closer circle is happy about this, but now i’m learning that it is also okay to let friendships go. I don’t owe anyone my friendship. Might sound weird, idk. But yeah :)"
– AnotherPeaInThePod
"Oh man. Same. You should have been there for my last family gathering. Me not defaulting to servant/punching back like they were used to led to an all out uproar. The worst part was they took it out on my wife, blamed her for supporting my independence and right to not be used. It's been a while since I've seen most of them now and I had to come to terms with the fact that I will probably never be close with my sister again."
– ironwheatiez
"You teach people how to treat you"
– expert_dogpetter
Be Good To Yourself
"Being kind to yourself is so hard because we’re (older gen maybe a bit more I guess?) taught implicitly for years NOT to do it. It is something new that you are starting against something much worse long established Like every new skill it will take time to develop and that is totally ok"
"Related: Don’t punish yourself for a lapse in “discipline” when trying something new. Take a break (Whether it’s minutes or days or longer) and try again. It’s not a setback, it’s a readjustment to helping build a stronger habit to give the version of you that you want to be a chance. 10 push-ups today might not seem like much but if yesterday was zero, then 10 is a lot."
– ValBravora048
Listen To Your Heart
"It's made me realise just how little I listen to my emotions normally - and that emotions are amoral and can't be rationalized away, they just exist."
"When my therapist asks me how I'm feeling about something, so often I don't know - or I do know the answer, but it feels ugly/mean, so I don't want to admit it, even to myself. Once you clock how often that's happening, you realize why bottling so much stuff up is leading to your general unhappiness/stress."
"Still working on this, but it's surprised me to have that big of a revelation when I thought of myself as being very emotionally mature. (Turns out I can manage everyone else's but not my own)"
– Lordaxxington
Not All My Fault
"That it really IS my brain chemistry and not just a Me Problem."
"Due to circumstances, I had to complete a 10 week program in order to qualify for getting assessed for medications. My first therapist quit after my 9th session, and since she was the only one offering the program at that clinic, I had to start again with another from week 1"
"Both told me that I'm doing everything right, that I know and use all the coping mechanisms, that they can't REALLY help me from thier position and both reccomended I get medicated (tbf I have my own reservations about exactly how much work can really be done in 10 sessions against a life time of Being Like This but that's a whole other issue)"
"But the difference is honestly night and day."
"I can't explain to you the f*cking PEACE I feel now. Not having a melt down due to taking a little bit too long putting change in my purse at the grocery store, not having months of fog with no memory of events, being able to just exist in my body and environment without feeling like I've called doom upon myself for the crime of existing in a space."
"I still have work to do on myself, but oh my God it's so much easier."
– Aware_Bet
But Faaamily!
"You don't HAVE TO like your parents. It's not some sort of requirement."
– 10throwaway123456789
"Jumping off your comment: that your parents are just people you share the planet with and you may not like who your parents are as people and that's okay."
– EmbarrassedBoat9587
"I remember my big breakthrough moment with my therapist was."
""You know both your parents are terrible people right?""
""Well, they have both done bad things, sure.""
""Count the number of good things they have done for you and then the bad things to you""
""...""
""Yeah. You owe them nothing.""
– coniferous-1
You Feel What You Feel
"The more you run from your own feelings, the stronger they get. It’s only through acknowledging and facing your feelings that you’ll be able to work through them. Also, labeling feelings as “good” or “bad” is counterproductive. Your feelings are valid. How you process and express those feelings is what’s important."
– scaryboilednoodles
Best Advice
"Don't accept criticism from someone you wouldn't go to for advice"
"No one can walk all over you if you don't lay down on the floor for them"
– slynnmart
I wish someone had told me that when I was younger!