If it's too good to be true.... IT'S TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!!! That is just simple fact. You have to be careful when investing anything these days. Time, love, emotion and especially... COIN! Don't give out money unless you've done the research and the people involved are 100% tip top. We're all looking for a way to make it big and be stable in the financials but don't trust every carrot that comes across you.
Redditor u/Copper_Clouds wanted yo hear from everyone about some life choices gone awry by asking.... What is the worst investment a person can make and why?
Luck of the Draw....
Giphy
Lottery tickets. There are people that throw hundreds of dollars they can't afford into that hole hoping that it might pay off. And I guess it *might*... but practically everything else on this list is more likely to somehow make you money than that is. bandastalo
Shiny Objects.
Jewelry, especially mass produced jewelry you'd get at the mall. It's not worth more than the scrap value of the metal and gemstones it's made of. DonkeyTron42
Or get it custom made from a non-big box jeweler. They can really help stretch out the impact your dollar gets if you are flexible with certain things like lab-grown gems v/ natural. HagarTheTolerable
Sweet Home....
An older, high-maintenance house in a declining area that has little hope for gentrification. Back2Bach
A young couple struggles to repair a hopelessly dilapidated house. _chanandler_bong
I own a verrry old, restored/upgraded house (with a mother-in-law unit) in an area in the first stages of gentrification. I got reeeeeeal lucky. cha-ching. Stealth_Cow
RISK.
If you are talking about real investments, anything a person tries to sell you as low to no risk, but high returns, is probably a fraud. Risk is strongly correlated to reward, you can't have one without the other no matter what fancy language they are using for reasons why. catawba1
It's All Popped....
Giphy
Pop culture bs. Beanie babies, cabbage patch dolls, funko pops.
In a decade no one will care about these pop culture items and they will have no value. skotgil
No Vroom.
Any used European luxury car brand, like Porsche or Mercedes. A wise man once told me "There is nothing more expensive than a cheap Porsche." sparky104
People seem to forget that even if you buy an originally £60k car for £10k it's still a £60k car to fix. FakeNathanDrake
Ask Mr. Ed.
Giphy
Horses. You can pay $100k for the next Olympic prospect, and then something could happen to the horse before it even reaches that level of skill. The same for racehorses- the odds are lower than 1 in 10 on a horse that'll make it big. warmkittenmittens
Money Logic.
Getting a 30 year ARM instead of a 15 year fixed because you can get more house for your money. I got a 15 year fixed mortgage and had the house paid off in 9 years, now saving $1200 a month and living comfortably. Around the same time, a good friend of mine got a 30 year adjustable at max budget (a much nicer house than mine), and lost the house 4 years later. He's living with his parents now trying to work his way out of bankruptcy. Really a shame. DesertEagle520
A Non Education.
Giphy
Education in a field that isn't employable, doesn't interest you, or simply is on a crappy level in all the schools you can get into. If you're going to be a security guy or a supermarket employee, why study?
Bonus points if you're American and your education isn't free.
I'm saying this not because it is technically the worst investment (it isn't), it's just that it's a mistake made by so many, and it's a very expensive one. AnAverageFreak
Outside the Box.
Giphy
Big box timeshares. Because of the huge upfront costs simply for access to properties and features, the monthly costs, and the difficulty/cost of selling them, it is always 100% less risky and cheaper over the long term to shop discount offers and pay for your vacations out-of-pocket, or buy vacation homes at your favorite spots that you rent out when you're not there. dialate
Bingo!
My coworker took out a loan of a thousand and bought lottery tickets thinking he can make back more. He won 50 bucks. coolhwhip89
Saw a story about a teenager who stole a roll of scratchies from a news agent where she was working.
There were 240 x $1 tickets on the roll. She got $50. And six months. Partly_Dave
Friendship!
Investing in a friend's business venture, especially when it ruins the friendship. DarthContinent
I went to a dinner party once that turned into a invitation to get my foot in the door for a candle company! Let's just say the night ended with the cops called and a plasma screen tv broken. jpm1188
Destruction.
Any investment that involves family or close friends. Odds are it will end up destroying your relationship. Col_Walter_Tits
With family and friends, never lend anything especially money that you are unwilling to lose. Better_than_Zero
To the Street.
Giphy
r/Wallstreetbets would say stock options are both the best and worst investment you may ever make, many times with their positions you'll either lose it all or quintuple your investment in a few days. dollar-a-day
Dive In.
A boat is the answer. reviseyourlevis
I agree with boats, but I own a pool and it is awesome. They really aren't that much maintenance. There is nothing better than having a nice buzz, and going out to go swimming at 1am on a hot night. MenosDaBear
Money Lost Guarantee.....
Investing in a musical. You have about a 1/200 chance of getting your money back, let alone making any profit whatsoever. RoyalKingHarlequin
Meh. Like many things, you can 'invest' in things like this, so that you get invited to all the surrounding events and use those to network, further your career or find new opportunities. Reddit
Depreciated Value....
I'm flashing back to when a tow truck driver negged me for having a used car while he was towing me. He reasoned the value drops as soon as you drive it off the lot. Unlike new cars apparently lesserantilles
He meant you should buy a NEW car, and then never drive it off the lot, just leave it there so it won't depreciate. Dude_With_A_Username
AM/FM
There's a radio ad that says a time share is the worst investment you'll ever make because apparently it's the only thing you won't know how much it'll cost you. Debbiero70
They are horrendous investments. It is near impossible to sell, even at insanely reduced prices.
My mom is in this boat right now. She bought one with my dad when they were the thing to do and now she can't give it away.
Why get the time share when you can rent the same place as an AirBnB without the commitment. Aken42
The Future is Dead.
Giphy
Esports teams. I've been involved with the scene for the past 10 years or so. Organizations constantly appear and disappear for good reason. It's incredibly hard to actually profit as an organization, and investors are always pumping money in without seeing any returns, trying to bet on the "future" of esports being like professional sports leagues (which it might be, but it's been pretty slow to get there). Only the top tier teams make any money, and even a handful of them have major financial issues. RuPaulver
I can tell you from experience that airplanes are not a good idea. Don't ask me how I know. A lady never kisses and tells, but highlights are ok. There will never be enough room and the movies are lying.
Like Glue...
Melissa Mccarthy Falling GIFGiphy"I lived in Australia for a bit and our studio had this black pleather couch. It looked exactly like that casting couch meme so we tried it for fun once. My ex sweats a lot even when it's not 40C out, but it was and we stuck to the couch like glue."
The Sting
"On a hike in a wildlife refuge. We went off the trail to a more remote area. Was all fun and games tell I got stung on the penis. Was after the event had ended when I was briefly exposed, the little moron went right at me. We joke about it regularly, I'd say it comes up monthly. Just out of the blue she will say "hey remember when you got stung on your penis?" Yes, I remember and will never forget."
Up a Tree
"A "treehouse" that was actually a plywood shack on 6' stilts. It was pretty old and the plywood was splintery, so he laid down an old towel for me (you know, like a gentleman.) Also it was too small for me to fit in any direction, so my head stuck out the door. I stared at the sky and just... And that's the story of how I lost my virginity! A close second would be the bed in his semi-abandoned house full of the semi-abandoned hoarded belongings of his mother. But that's a different story."
Walk Away...
"Met a girl online and we tried to do it at the park. A cop showed up before we started and told us we had to leave. We went back to our cars which was at a small shopping mall. We went behind the shopping mall and got it on behind a dumpster. It worked out well so we met up there again a week later. Except that time, as we were walking away, a dump truck picked the dumpster to empty the trash. Was hilarious at the time but frightening looking back on it. This was about 10 years ago."
Keyed Off
Piano Performing GIFGiphy"I don't recommend on top of a piano. Very uncomfortable and not at all the experience we envisioned."
Scratchy...
Screaming The Voice GIF by NBCGiphy"Bottom of cliff next to the ocean. Turns out I have an allergic reaction to coral and my back was scratched the hell up from it. It was windy, wet, and itchy. Runner up is a movie theatre."
Smoked
"In a literal smoke house... lost my virginity with about 50 rings of deer sausage hanging around to dry. My friend and his dad were gone and we were like "this seems like a great place!" At least when I went home I smelled like venison instead of sex."
"Well, if you find yourself stuck in a rut, it'll be something to fawn over."
Hey Fam...
"I'm not sure if this counts because we didn't get very far. But In a Burger King parking lot… He had a car, so we would park it someplace and hook up in the tiny little two-seater. I was sitting astride him and most of my clothes were off when he froze. I looked over my shoulder and the once abandoned parking lot was abandoned no more. A family of four were just staring at us through the windshield. We didn't know what to do so I just put my shirt back on and we drove away."
"we can hear everything"
"My childhood house had an enclosed porch that was level with my parents' bedroom window (it's hard to explain). You couldn't see into the porch from the window, but if the porch windows were open and the bedroom windows were open you could hear everything from either room."
"So my now husband and I were trying to have sex in that porch, having opened the windows cuz it was hot AH. My parents usually never opened their window and it was past ten, when they usually went to sleep. We weren't trying to be loud, but apparently we were."
"After we were done, I checked my phone and I had 5 missed calls and a text from my mother saying "we can hear everything" and "please at least use a condom". We didn't acknowledge it at the time but my mom got drunk a few years ago and told my aunt the story and said she was worried she was hearing the conception of her grandchild."
Ivy!
jerry seinfeld help GIF by HULUGiphy"After a drunken night on 6th st in Austin, girl and I were walking down red river st, she drags me in this bushy grassy area, we go at it, finish, call an Uber to west campus, continue going at it. The next day, we are super itchy, come to find later it was poison ivy, got it all over our genitals. Fun times. 10/10 would do it again though."
Also, be careful when and if you do it on a bus. You're never fully out of the driver's line of sight. Don't ask me how I know, I just do. Be careful out there but have fun.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Redditor Pooky135790 wanted to know:
"What are the best adult jokes that are hidden in kids movies?"
These scenes really had us rolling.
Shrek definitely has a few innuendos.
"In Shrek talking about Snow White:"
"'Although she lives with 7 other men, she's not easy.'"
"Gets me every time!"
- Sregge
"The whole Duloc opening scene with the singing puppets. 'Please keep off of the grass, shine your shoes, wipe your…….face.'"
"Also in Shrek: when they get to Farquuad's castle, they note the large size of it, and Shrek asks if Farquuad is compensating for something."
"This joke is great because everyone can laugh at it."
"Kids will think it's a joke about his height."
"Adults will think it's a joke about his other kind of height."
Lord Farquaad Ok GIF by PeacockTVGiphyCars had plenty of jokes.
"In Cars when the two Miata ladies flash their pop-ups at McQueen"
"I didn't realize for years that that was the connotation."
"Look at that scene again and look at the photographers behind Mia."
"It took me a second but I think the one directly in the middle is zooming in on their posteriors lmfao."
- -Paint
lightning mcqueen car GIF by Disney PixarGiphy"Also the Piston Cup. 'He did what in his cup?!' Funny enough 10 year old me got that and my dad didn't."
"Also in Cars, when Mack is driving down the highway and wants to pull over into a truck stop to rest, the sign at the truck stop says 'Top Down Truck Stop, All Convertible Waitresses.'"
Robots had it's fair share of moments.
"In Robots the [father of the] main character and his wife get the parts for their robot child and exclaim, 'Making the baby's the fun part!'"
"Also the old lady bot, Aunt Fanny, has a lot of junk in her trunk."
Oh, Ratatouille.
"There is that one scene from Ratatouille, when Linguini is about to confess about how Remy is in his hat cooking for him, and says 'I... have... a little... tiny...' and right after he says tiny, Collette quickly glances down at his pants. I never even noticed it until someone pointed it out to me because it is pretty subtle and can be easy to miss."
"Seriously the best dick joke in a kid's movie."
"That and the time when the short lil chef guy catches linguini in the pantry and says, 'One can become to familiar with vegetables, you know!'"
ratatouille flirting GIF by Disney PixarGiphyCoco really went there!
"In Coco, everybody laughs when they say Hector died 'choking on chorizo.'"
"'Choking on chorizo' is Mexican slang for sucking d*ck."
"I mean the song Hector sings to his dying friend has the implied, but not spoken, lyrics: 'And her tits they drag on the floor...' (he says 'knuckles' but the guy shouts, 'those aren't the words!')."
- TerH2
What a forgotten gem Monster House was.
"Monster House."
"'That's it's uvula!' 'Oh.... So it's a girl house....'"
"Rick and Morty gets a lot of hate around here because of the sh*tty fan base, but Dan Harmon is a genuinely funny writer."
"Could not BELIEVE Dan Harmon was a writer on this 'til I googled Monster House; your point is a good one lol."
Even in Frozen.
"'Foot size doesn't matter' - when Anna from Frozen talks about her fiancé."
"Frozen 2, 'I like you better in leather anyway' when Kristoff dresses up for Anna at the end."
"My boyfriend and roommate and I all watched it and all three of us spat our drinks at that and we all did the 'Did we just hear what we think we heard?' look. Then we laughed for like 10 solid minutes."
Not a movie, but still good.
"There was an episode of Dexter's laboratory where the father kept going on about Dexter's mother's muffin, and saying he only married her for her muffin. The whole episode was filled with innuendo."
"'Your father is a muffin fiend, a muff-o-maniac, just the aroma can make him crazy.' Lol. Had to see it for myself."
"Season 2 ep 18 The Muffin King."
"There was the episode about DeeDee and Dexter having decoder rings! DeeDee says Dexter's club is for big 'I-D-K-S-C' Dexter decodes it, gasps, and says he's gonna tell mom. Lol."
Whispering French GIFGiphyChildren's shows may be for kids entertainment, but they're created by adults. No doubt they're going to slip in a few naughty jokes here and there.
Time to re-watch some old favorites and see what we missed when we were younger.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.