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People Who Had 'Abstinence Only' Sex Ed Break Down The Most Outrageous Things They Were Taught

This is not how it works people...

People Who Had 'Abstinence Only' Sex Ed Break Down The Most Outrageous Things They Were Taught
Image by Capri23auto from Pixabay

Let's talk about sex baby, let's talk about you and me and... everybody you can possibly think of. Why are we so timid do discuss this issue? It's really an American issue. The Europeans seem fine to openly share naughty details and run around naked in front of one another. But in America the topic is still taboo. That's why so many artists push so many boundaries with the topic, to spark discussion. And it's imperative that the discussion be fact-based. Too many schools are handing out information to students that will only cause more problems later. Abstinence is not the only answer and quite frankly, is unlikely. Time to spill facts.

Redditor u/bongzmcdongz was hoping we could all rationally discuss the actualities of the birds and bees by asking... People who had "Abstinence Only" sex education, what was the most outrageous or untrue thing you were told?

***The following material is sensitive but imperative. Those under 17 should have a parental chat!***

"Facts"

I myself attended Catholic school, and we never once discussed the carnal. In fact, when we inquired about Mary and her "Virgin" birth, we were immediately shut down with... because it's in the Bible. What else does one expect nuns to say? Now I did leave Catholic school after eighth grade, so I have no idea what they taught in high school, but it's probably safe to assume they mostly skim the actual facts. Maybe I'm wrong... let's see.

Something is Missing

x factor what GIFGiphy

I was given a diagram of the female anatomy in which the clitoris had been erased-- as in someone went into MS paint and whited it out on a line drawing of the exterior of the vulva. The urethra, vagina, labia, anus were labelled, and then at the top of the labia, it was whited out.

fraulien_buzz_kill

the what is a WHAT?!

That the actual vagina opening is as small as the tip of a pencil. I also never knew women didn't pee from their vaginas until I was 16. I'm 19 now and learned more from crap-posts on the internet than I ever had in school.

moimoisauna

"I also never knew women didn't pee from their vaginas until I was 16."

Believe it or not, that puts you well ahead of the game. You'd be amazed at the amount of grown men who don't know that! 🌸.

LasRua

SMDH!!

Actual quote from my 9th grade health class:

"If you have sex, chances are you won't get HIV. But, chances are you will."

ToadHeartbreak


Kissing is Gross

creep no GIF by Manny404Giphy

Kissing gets you pregnant.

bigev13

Same except the nuns told us that French kissing in a bathing suit would get you pregnant. Also, they said you shouldn't go on a date to a restaurant that uses white tablecloths because that looks like sheets which would make your date think of bed and you'd end up having sex.

knittininthemitten

Ouch!

Girls and boys had to go to different rooms during sex-Ed. The girls were told that "abstinence is the best option because sex is painful." The boys weren't told that.

I understand that sex can be painful for some people, but pretending sex isn't a source of pleasure at all for women is flat out wrong and depressing.

gnome_rave

"Say What?"

See, now how in the world is any of that considered education? Would you teach addition without using numbers? It's sex people. It's a part of the everyday cycle of life. Some of those responses are truly shocking. I would have laughed out loud even at a young age. It all sounds made up. Oh wait most of that was. Shall we continue?

"Dress" for the occasion...

My girlfriend's sex Ed program in middle school included a wedding dress that they splattered with red paint.

countrymac96

I'm assuming it symbolizes the blood of first sex, which, if is before marriage, taints the pureness of the ritual and thus ruins everything. TLDR sex bad don't screw before ring. Idiots.

Sinister_Fish42

For the Girls

We were shown a video where a lady said she could tell if a girl was a virgin just by looking into her eyes. The implication was that premarital sex causes your spirit to die so that you become just a shell with nothing to offer.

Edit to add: I'm sure you can guess that she didn't say the same applied for the boys, as if teenage girls are the only ones to blame for anyone having premarital sex.

fireflyfly3

At Once?

Seth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy

Having sex with 1 person is like having sex with 100 people.

KleinP7

No Sharing!

The instructor gave all the boys in the class chewing gum and let them chew on it for a few minutes. Then she asked them if any of them wanted to share. Of course none did. Then she asked if they didn't want to share gum, why would they want to share sex partners?

This was in a co-ed class so all the girls in the class got to see too.

Diet_Coke

We Pray ALOT!!

golden girls blanche GIF by HULUGiphy

I was taught in school that self pleasure was also a sin. So as a young girl discovering her body, every time I masturbated, I'd cry because I thought I was going to hell.

I don't know how many times I prayed to God asking for forgiveness.

phillupontakos

No Hugs

My dad pointed to a teenage couple hugging when i was a kid and told me thats how you get pregnant.

Months later at the fair my aunt put my 5 yr old cousin on the back of my horse and told him to wrap his arms around my waist to hold on. My heart sank. Later that day I shamefully told my dad that my 5 yr old cousin got me pregnant.

bonny_bunny

In Dublin

So I'm Irish and Catholic.

Growing up in Dublin we had church sanctioned sex education, some of the highlights:

-All penises are the same size when erect (we were 14 and this was hilarious to us)

-Being gay is just a phase

-No method of birth control is reliable (including oral sex and body rubbing).

Khale77

Let's Talk

Opposite story: I went to a Catholic high school. My Health teacher was a progressive. So she closed the door and said "Listen, ok, sure, masturbation is a sin or whatever, but it's actually fine. You gotta, you know, clean out the pipes once in a while. Now if your friends ask you to go to the movies and your answer is 'Sorry, gotta stay home and masturbate' probably step it back a bit."

mekdot83

Used Up

Bubble Gum GIF by QuavoGiphy

This woman once compared a teenage girl who's had premarital sex as chewed up bubble gum. She then switched the comparison to a pair of worn out shoes. Crap you not.

the89delta

Moist Issues

I was convinced that saliva was involved in the baby-making process. Not that you'd kiss someone and then boom pregnant, but that someone's saliva over time would make their baby look like you. The more saliva, the stronger the resemblance.

Long story short I spit in my cousin's drinks for a solid 2 months because I wanted her baby (she was pregnant at the time) to look like me (who was 8)

ETA: this was about 25 years ago, and also I'm a woman! That's how absolutely terrible my sex education was.

Amaline4

Um... Next Question

The teacher said that you can only really love one sexual partner and that's why it's so important that your spouse be your first and only partner. One of my classmates raised her hand and said, "My mom died when I was a baby and my dad's been married to my stepmom for ten years. Does that mean he only loves one of them?"

The teacher just looked uncomfortable and moved on to how premarital sex causes depression.

Jazmadoodle

Oh Utah

This is probably pretty tame, but Sophomore year our teacher told us using multiple condoms at a time increases its effectiveness.

I then asked my mom the same thing, and her whole job is to teach safe sex to youth.

Spoiler alert: do not layer condoms. It sounds good in practice, but you're actually weakening the condoms and wasting them.

Utah's sex ed policy was/is crap.

JesterTheSheep

Wonder why...

lucy liu film GIFGiphy

Went to public school and had real sex ed but had a history teacher who told us that sex before marriage is a sin, because every time you have sex you get pregnant.

And if a kid is born outside of wedlock they are going to hell and we will also go to hell for damning the baby's soul before it's even born. She said condoms and any other birth control is an insult to God and a way for atheists to try and outsmart him. She didn't work there after that year. Wonder why...

Rickrickrickrickrick

What Works

Condoms don't always work so it's better to not use them.

If you ejaculate on a girl (yes, "on") she will get pregnant. Regardless of if you had sex or not.

Boys get so horny sometimes they can't control themselves. So girls, it's up to you to remove temptation for the boys.

Birth control pills disrupt a girl's hormones so badly she will become barren.

Oregonja

Pieces of Me

That every time I (a girl) had sex I was giving away a part of my soul. So each sex partner whittled away bits of my soul. If I had sex before marriage my God-given husband would only get a tiny scrap instead of a full half and thus wouldn't be able to love me as much as he would if I'd waited? Honestly it's pretty confusing. This was taught in my Christian private school.

freckledjezebel

I can't with any of that. It's really shameful. We can't send kids out into the world misinformed. It will only lead to people learning in ways that are even more worrisome. And most parents don't seem comfortable enough to chat about it. Loosen up people. The future of generations is at stake. I'm not saying don't practice abstinence but let's explore all of the options as well. Sex. Say it. Do it. Safely.

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Bizarre Historical Facts They Never Taught Us In School
Photo by Austin Lowman on Unsplash

We can't learn everything in school, and maybe that's a good thing—because these bizarre historical facts are too weird for a textbook. Like Abraham Lincoln's other assassination, Thomas Edison's little-known dark side, or Mozart's obsession with butts...and that's just naming a few. Strap in for this VERY strange ride.

1. Queen Elizabeth Had A Nasty Mouth

Although dental hygiene was not necessarily at its peak in Tudor England, Queen Elizabeth I’s fondness for sweets gave her pearly whites an even darker tone...in fact, her chompers were probably very black. More than that, since sugar was a luxury, some women then blackened their teeth both to emulate their queen and show off their wealth.

2. Thomas Edison Was Evil

The famous inventor Thomas Edison had a huge dark side not many people know about. For example, he used electricity to publicly kill animals. He wanted to show how alternating current was more dangerous than the "direct" current that he used. On one occasion, he used A/C to execute a rogue circus elephant named "Topsy" in front of thousands of people.

3. Alexander The Great's Mother Was Scary

File:Cassandre et Olympia-Jean Joseph Taillasson mg 8223.jpg ...commons.wikimedia.org

Queen Olympias was Alexander the Great's mother, and she was even more ruthless than her son. On one occasion, she sent a captive enemy queen a cup of poison, a noose, and a sword...then told her to choose how she would die. According to history, the woman chose to hang herself, though she cursed Olympias to the very end of her life.

4. Napoleon Used His Wife As A "Womb"

Napoleon Bonaparte famously adored his wife Josephine, but few people remember the dark end of their love affair. Tragically, Josephine couldn't have children, so Napoleon made a hard choice: He divorced Josephine and took up with Marie-Louise of Austria. Napoleon reportedly told his blushing bride straight off, “It is a womb that I am marrying.”

5. Ernest Hemingway Almost Died In Back-To-Back Plane Crashes

In 1954, the macho writer Ernest Hemingway got into a plane crash. He miraculously survived, but that was just the start of the nightmare. When he tried to take another plane to get medical help, that plane exploded upon taking off. Hemingway managed to survive again. Talk about bad luck. Or wait a minute...actually, is that good luck?

6. King Edward VIII Was A Colossal Jerk

King Edward VIII and Mrs Simpson on holiday in Yugoslavia,… | Flickrwww.flickr.com

King Edward VIII lost his brother Prince John at a young age from a severe seizure. The boy had suffered from epilepsy and other ailments for years, but Edward’s response was so disturbing, it’s impossible to forget. He referred to John’s passing as “little more than a regrettable nuisance.”

7. The FBI Knew About Pearl Harbor

The FBI ignored compelling evidence about the attack on Pearl Harbor because they didn’t trust the Serbian double agent Dusan Popov, who was apparently a gambling, lustful lush. Dusan's nickname around town was "tricycle" because of his infamous love of threesomes. Unsurprisingly, he was one of the inspirations for Ian Fleming’s James Bond.

8. There Were Original "Siamese Twins"

Two Siam natives, Chang and Eng Bunker, were American twins joined at the sternum. During the American Civil War in 1865, Eng’s name was drawn in a draft lottery, but not Chang's. There was little the conscription officials could do: The brothers were not only joined at the sternum, but their livers were also fused. Neither twin served in the conflict.

9. Ben Franklin Had Bodies In His Basement

File:Joseph Siffrein Duplessis - Benjamin Franklin - Google Art ...en.wikipedia.org

While renovating his home into a museum, researchers made a horrific discovery at Ben Franklin's house. They found 10 bodies in the founding father's basement. This led to speculation he may have been a serial killer. However, the bodies were more likely cadavers used for the anatomical studies of one of Franklin’s friends.

10. You Can Use Honey For Some Messed-Up Activities

King Herod, the tyrant king of Judea, had his wife, Mariamne I, preserved in honey after her death. Herod ordered her execution, but found her too beautiful to bury and so kept and preserved her body for seven years. Herod suffered from paranoid delusions, rage, and arteriosclerosis, but his death in 4 BCE came at the hands of a mysterious and agonizing illness that modern doctors are still not able to identify.

At one point, the pain was so excruciating, the king attempted to take his own life. The illness came to be known, among the Judean people, as “Herod’s Evil.”

11. Abraham Lincoln Cheated Death Once

Abraham Lincoln was almost killed two years before he was assassinated. Late one August evening in 1863, Lincoln rode alone by horse to his family’s summer residence. A private at the gate heard a shot ring out and, moments later, a bareheaded Lincoln clinging to his steed galloped into the yard. Lincoln explained that gunfire at the foot of the hill had sent his horse into a frenzied gallop, running so fast that it knocked his hat off.

The two men retrieved Lincoln’s hat, which had a bullet hole in it. Lincoln asked the guards to keep the incident quiet because he didn’t want to worry his wife...

12. Public Beddings Were A Thing

File:Catherine de Médicis - entourage de François Clouet.jpg ...commons.wikimedia.org

Catherine de Medici was only 14 when she married Henri, the son of King Francis. And although she was young, the King and other older men insisted on watching the consummation of the marriage.

13. The Most Ruthless French Queen

The Tour de Nesle affair was a scandal in the French royal family in 1314. In it, Queen Isabella of England accused her sisters-in-law of adultery. The scandal led to the imprisonment of the women and the execution of their lovers. The lovers were then executed. Most histories agree that they were first castrated and then drawn and quartered.

14. Marie Curie Slowly Killed Herself

Marie Curie, the chemist who conducted pioneering research on radioactivity, was completely in the dark when it came to the dangers of radioactive materials. Though she and her husband both suffered from chronic pain, neither considered that it was their radioactive substance-handling that was the cause. It was. Some of their original lab equipment is still so radioactive that we cannot safely view or study them.

15. George Bush Coined An Unfortunate Word

File:George H. W. Bush presidential portrait (cropped 2) (a).jpg ...commons.wikimedia.org

After George Bush Sr. vomited on the Japanese Prime Minister, the Japanese invented a new word: Bushusuru. This means to “do the Bush thing” or to “publicly vomit.”

16. Gandhi Liked To Tempt Himself With Young Women

Today we see Gandhi as a figure of peaceful protest and understanding. But there's a side of him no one knows. At the age of 36, while married, Gandhi became more and more obsessed with lust. In order to train and “perfect” his control over his desires, Gandhi would sleep undressed with young women. But one night, he committed an act so heinous that it made his own staff member quit on him forever.

Gandhi had performed this sleeping act with his own grand-niece named Manu. His stenographer left in disgust.

17. The Most Notorious Hollywood Eccentric

Howard Hughes was one of the most successful men of his time, producing many famous movies and dating Hollywood's most beautiful women. However, later in life, he became a complete hermit. Hughes spent his days in hotels, refusing to make eye contact with his aides. He also stopped bathing completely. Even more gross? He only cut his hair and nails cut once a year.

18. Nero Hated His Mother

File:15-07-05-Schloß-Caputh-RalfR-N3S 1528.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

According to one ancient historian, the mad Emperor Nero tried and failed several times to kill his mother Agrippina the Younger, each time trying to up the ante. First, he tried to poison her on several occasions, but she always took an antidote each time. Then, he constructed a machine that would collapse her bedroom ceiling on her while she slept, but she caught wind of the plot and escaped.

Finally, he—seriously—invented a collapsible boat that would drown her while she was on a pleasure cruise. Reader, SHE STILL SURVIVED.

19. Grace Kelly Was A Homewrecker

Grace Kelly has a pristine, princess-like reputation in Hollywood, but nothing could be further from the truth. She had affairs with, and I quote, "everybody." She fell for so many of her older male co-stars that multiple biographers have wondered if Kelly had some daddy issues. There was Gary Cooper, Clark Gable, and Ray Milland, just to name a few. Milland's wife even called Kelly a "home-wrecker."

20. Victorians Had Impossible Beauty Standards

Although the hourglass figure has always held a special appeal across Western cultures, the Victorians took their obsession to a whole new level in their use of corsets. These waist-cinching devices, while successful in achieving a "wasp waist," had some major health repercussions. Besides causing fainting spells, which the era’s ladies unsurprisingly became famous for, the restriction on women’s lungs likely worsened potentially deadly ailments like pneumonia and tuberculosis.

21. Sweden Wasn't Always Peaceful

File:Verwilt - Erik XiV DSC6824.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

Erik XIV of Sweden was super paranoid. It wasn’t unusual for people caught laughing, smiling, or whispering within Erik’s earshot to find themselves on trial for treason. Somewhat ironically, he passed in 1577 when someone poisoned his pea soup. We guess just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you.

22. Mary Shelley Kept Her Husband's Heart

Frankenstein author Mary Shelley had a pretty gross secret hidden away in her desk: her dead husband’s heart. When her husband, the poet Percy Bysshe Shelley, drowned in a boating accident, he was cremated, but his heart remained intact. Mary eventually took possession of it, and researchers discovered it in her desk when she passed a few years later.

23. King Henry VIII Had Royal Bottom Wipers

The infamous King Henry VIII employed four Grooms of the Stool, men whose job it was to wipe the royal bottom and attend to his other private needs. It was a position of great honor, but also—as one Groom soon discovered—incredibly grave danger. Henry VIII executed one of his bathroom staff, Sir Henry Norris, on trumped-up charges that he was sleeping with Henry's second wife Anne Boleyn.

24. Versailles Wasn't As Glamorous As We Think

Château de Versailles (Yvelines) | Le château vue depuis le … | Flickrwww.flickr.com

The legendary Palace of Versailles had everything—except enough toilets for everybody. Despite the villa’s luxury, Versailles simply didn’t have enough public water closets to accommodate Louis XIV’s huge court. It wasn’t uncommon for courtiers to pay each other for access to those precious commodes…or else, they simply went in the corner.

25. Mozart Loved Poop

Mozart was surprisingly obsessed with bathroom humor. Two of his songs actually talk about analingus. He also wrote letters to his family where he described his bowel movements in great detail.

26. King George IV Got A Brutal Revenge

King George IV hated his wife Caroline of Brunswick. When their only daughter perished in childbirth, George didn't even tell Caroline. She had to find out by accident through a courier.

27. Joan Crawford Once Gave Her Crush A Disturbing "Gift"

File:Joan Crawford in Humoresque, 1946 (cropped).png - Wikimedia ...commons.wikimedia.org

Actress Joan Crawford once came on to her co-star Henry Fonda by making him a red sequined jockstrap.

28. A King Of Egypt Had A Disgusting Appetite

While many of Egypt’s citizens starved, King Farouk of Egypt reportedly ate 600 oysters a week. Not content with this, he also bought a candy red Bentley, then demanded that no one else paint their own cars red.

29. Jack The Ripper Might Have Been A Royal

For a long time, people thought Queen Victoria's grandson Prince Albert Victor was Jack the Ripper.

30. A Famous Comedian Hated One Color

File:Peter Sellers at home in Belgravia, London, 1973.jpg - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.org

Comedian Peter Sellers hated the color green. He claimed it gave him “strange vibrations.” He not only refused to wear the hue, but he also refused to act opposite of anyone who did.

31. Russian Tsarinas Had A Naughty Addiction

Foot tickling was used in the Muscovite palaces and courts for centuries as a means of arousal. Many of the Czarinas (Catherine the Great, Anna Ivanovna, and others) loved it. It was so popular that eunuchs and women were employed as full-time foot ticklers.

32. The Royal Mistress Who Was A Dominatrix

Dancer and royal mistress Lola Montez carried a whip around wherever she went and lashed it out on anyone who displeased her, including members of the public, bored theatre-goers, and critics who gave her bad reviews.

33. Dracula Had A Dirty Little Secret

File:Bela Lugosi as Dracula.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

Dracula actor Bela Lugosi once had an affair with starlet Clara Bow, and commissioned an undressed portrait of the actress. He then displayed the large painting prominently in all of his homes from 1929 until his passing—including in the houses he shared with his last two wives.

34. Einstein Was Stupid In One Way

Albert Einstein's secretary once got an anonymous call asking where Einstein lived. The secretary declined to respond. The caller then admitted he was Einstein himself, and that he had forgotten his address.

35. Isaac Newton May Have Been A Virgin

Though Isaac Newton lived to be 84, he never married. Some even believe he never lost his virginity.

36. This Medieval Queen Was A Grave-Robber

File:Joanna of castile with her children.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

Shortly after her beloved husband's passing, Queen Joanna of Castile ordered his body exhumed, had the casket opened, jumped to his side once again, and kissed his dearly departed feet. She then carried his casket everywhere with her.

37. Cleopatra Had Wild Parties

Cleopatra wasn’t just a powerful queen; she was also a party girl. She created a drinking club known as the “Inimitable Livers” with her husband Marc Antony. The club would feast and drink heavily and then go out to play pranks on unsuspecting citizens.

38. People Actually Slept In Coffins

Actress Sarah Bernhardt had a peculiar obsession with death, and from the tender age of 15 onward, she sometimes slept in a custom-made, satin-lined rosewood coffin.

39. Caligula Loved His Horse WAY Too Much

File:Antonio Tempesta (1555-1630) (after) - Caligula (AD 12–41 ...commons.wikimedia.org

The Roman Emperor Gaius Caligula made his horse a senator.

40. The Prince Who Was Raised Like A Girl

Philippe, Duke of Orleans was the brother of King Louis XIV. To prevent Philippe from threatening his famous brother, Philippe's mother Queen Anne of Austria raised him to be very feminine, calling him “my little girl” and even urging him to dress up in frilly, feminine clothing as a child.

41. History's Most Shocking Sideshow

Tarrare was an 18th-century French showman. His party trick? He obsessively ate everything, and lots of it. His circus act had him eating, among other things, whole live animals, a basket of apples, and even rocks.

42. A "Huge" Claim To Fame

File:Porfirio Rubirosa, circa 1954.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

1950s international playboy Porfirio Rubirosa had such an infamously large "package," Parisian waiters used to call their 16-inch pepper mills "Rubirosas."

43. Tsar Ivan Really Was Terrible

When Tsar Ivan the Terrible saw his pregnant daughter-in-law walking around in clothing that he didn't approve of, he absolutely snapped. He viciously attacked her, causing her to miscarry. When his son came into the room, Ivan also ended up killing him in a fit of rage.

44. But He Wasn't The Only Mad Russian

Anna, the "Mad Tsarina" of Russia, once tormented one of her hated courtiers by locking him up in an ice palace for the night. Before that, she made him pretend to be a chicken, sitting in her ante-chamber and "laying" eggs.

45. King Tut Was The Product Of The Siblings

File:King Tut Burial Mask (23785641449).jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

King Tutankhamun passed at the tender age of 18. Some researchers believe he died from genetic disease, due to the fact his parents were brother and sister.

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