Parents Share What Their Kids' Boyfriends Can Say To Make Them More Likeable[rebelmouse-image 18353589 is_animated_gif=
Guys, impressing your girlfriend's parents is intimidating, especially at first (at least, that's what they say). Need some pointers? You've come to the right place.
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Including the siblings in your plans? Smart.[rebelmouse-image 18353590 is_animated_gif=
My daughter is 16 and her boyfriend is 18. They have been dating for a year and a half or so. He is respectful to her and is always looking out for her interests and safety, and he enjoys spending time with us as a family. We have six children and he is an only child so he may like the novelty, but they took our 10-year-old daughter on their "date" today because she had a hard week. He treats my daughter like she deserves the world and never takes advantage or makes himself a nuisance, and she never feels like a burden. Our daughter also has anxiety and he will call me if he is concerned about her or notices she is struggling. He is just a quality human full of empathy, big dreams, and wholesome love for her.
It never hurts to give her dad the day off during a move.[rebelmouse-image 18353591 is_animated_gif=
The first time I met my wife's parents was when they were helping her move into a new apartment.
I too was there to help move all her stuff. Her father has since relayed that it made him like me because I just showed up, did all the work and he didn't have to do anything.
So I guess it's less say something nice, but do something nice.
Looks like dad wasn't prepared for gentleman Reece.[rebelmouse-image 18353592 is_animated_gif=
As a dad, I knew I wanted my daughter to date someone that made her happy the right way and wanted to date her for the right reasons. He had known her for a few years prior and had been friend-zoned. He wasn't dating her just to get in her pants. He understands how to pick at/on me, but knows not to go too far. He's intelligent, compassionate, and has her best interests in mind. He developed a relationship with me, knowing how much my daughter and I mean to each other. He's respectful and helps out when he can. He seeks feedback from me on big issues and weighs my advice.
Making someone laugh is beautiful way of showing love and respect.[rebelmouse-image 18353593 is_animated_gif=
My parents loved my most recent ex because of his ability to make me laugh and smile. I'm a super serious person and had little issue being goofy and happy with him, which they were thrilled about because I've been miserable for years.
Take some initiative around their parent's house.[rebelmouse-image 18345106 is_animated_gif=
My parents really like that my boyfriend helps clean up. After dinner, he helps clear the table and frequently helps wash the dishes.
They also like that he is polite and respects me and my opinions but also keeps me grounded in reality.
Edit: he also gets points for doing things before someone asks or notices. Is the trash getting full? He takes it out. My mom needs help reaching something? He grabs it for her. Time for the dogs to be fed? He's on top of it.
Helping her disabled mother? Big points.[rebelmouse-image 18353594 is_animated_gif=
My daughters are still babies, but my younger sister, 15 years younger than me, whom I helped raised and mentored, has a boyfriend that is very genuine, humble, and a hard worker. When my mom was moving out of the house she had lived in for ten years, we asked my sister's boyfriend if he minded coming by to help us move my mom's stuff. My mom is mentally disabled and also a hoarder. She had tons of stuff in her house that needed cleaning, tossing, and packing. My sister's boyfriend showed up every day and spend hours helping us pack and clean out my mom's house. While many of my siblings half-assed the work and left home early, this young kid worked constantly and didn't leave until night time when the work for the day was done. He was only dating my sister, yet, he showed more dedication than any of my siblings did on any of the projects that he said he would do. I find that admirable.
Have some direction in life, and know how to respectfully challenge authority.[rebelmouse-image 18353595 is_animated_gif=
My father asked my boyfriend what his 5-year plan was when he first came over. Mind you, he was 17 years old at the time. My bf calmly explained what he wanted to do then turns to my father and says, "And sir, what is your 5-year plan?" My dad's loved him ever since.
Is she happy when you're not around? It speaks volumes.[rebelmouse-image 18353596 is_animated_gif=
As an older brother to a sister. There is nothing you can say or do. It's what she says or does. If my sister acts like herself around you and talks good about you. She's had some Eddy Haskell type boyfriends, but I can see through that sh_t. If she likes you, I like you.
If being a nerd is the worst thing about this guy, he's a keeper.[rebelmouse-image 18352979 is_animated_gif=
I don't think my parents have really liked any of my boyfriends. My dad thinks my fiance is a nerd. I'm fine with that, my dad is exactly the kind of person who a traditional dad would not want his daughter to marry.
To answer the question, the bare minimum is to be polite and help around the kitchen if you can't think of anything to say.
Not going straight to the bedroom will win you some points.[rebelmouse-image 18351678 is_animated_gif=
My parents liked the boyfriends who engaged in conversation with them and didn't just shuffle in the house and up to my room without talking to anyone. They always felt that that was disrespectful but gave us a lot more freedom and respect if we tried to be part of the family and hung out downstairs with everyone for a while. I soon learned that was the route to being allowed a closed bedroom door!
You gotta stand up for daddy's little girl. It's the right thing to do.[rebelmouse-image 18353597 is_animated_gif=
My boyfriend and I were at a pizza place and this guy was really drunk. Guy kept talking to and walking up to boyfriend and his table. He was simply annoying at that point. Then he starting making direct comments towards me about how hot I was and my boyfriend immediately stood up and made the guy leave. My boyfriend is the goofy type so this was surprising behavior.
My dad was instantly impressed and praised my boyfriend for sticking up for me. My dads a macho man type.
Always remember your manners![rebelmouse-image 18353598 is_animated_gif=
My parents liked everyone (for the most part) if they did the following:
1) Had and demonstrated manners (hold the door open, please, thank you, dinner is delicious, etc) 2) Made eye contact 3) Carried on a conversation.
Best stick to that curfew, boys.[rebelmouse-image 18353599 is_animated_gif=
Sorry Kevin, not falling for it. Bring her back by 10 pm.
This is parenting done right.[rebelmouse-image 18353600 is_animated_gif=
Add happiness to her life. That's it. I don't care what job he does, how much money he has, what his 'prospects' are. She's a smart woman, she knows what she's doing and I trust her to pick the right person for her.
(She did, they're married, he's part of our family).
Arrogance will get you banned from the family.[rebelmouse-image 18352104 is_animated_gif=
Usually just be polite and listen to us and esp. to her when we speak: not be a know it all or come across as arrogant.
When dad stumbles upon a moment of pure joy...[rebelmouse-image 18353601 is_animated_gif=
Once my dad walked into the living room while my boyfriend and I were imitating the gorillas from Tarzan, and laughing our a**es off. He just nodded and left as quickly as he walked in.
Are dowries still a thing?[rebelmouse-image 18353602 is_animated_gif=
Bring a dowry of 5 cattle, dozen lambs, and a mastercrafted loom, so that my wife may provide me with fine garments, as well as building a formal alliance between our houses.
For context, I am a 12th century noble.
Might wanna tap into your fencing training, bro.[rebelmouse-image 18353603 is_animated_gif=
Every time my daughter brings a man home, I refuse to give him my blessing unless he can defeat me in a Punjabi style sword fight. Most of them chicken out immediately, which shows me they are cowards. One took me up on the challenge and fought me ferociously, but he wasn't very skilled, and I slew him easily. If a man can't even protect his own life with a sword, I can't imagine how he could possibly protect my daughter.
Taking your kids to Coachella? Bold. Proactively responsible boyfriend? Priceless.[rebelmouse-image 18353604 is_animated_gif=
My wife and I took my daughter and her boyfriend to the Coachella Music Festival a few weeks ago. They are both high school seniors. As you can guess they had a different set of shows that they wanted to see, so my wife and I would meet up with them a couple of times each day. Her boyfriend sent us a text (without her knowing) that she wasn't feeling good and that the security/medical team had taken her over the barricade (they were in the front) and to the back of the stage. He gave us frequent updates while we made our way to that stage. Our daughter was fine, just hot and dehydrated and surprised that we knew anything about it. His calm and regular information reinforced to us that he really is a good kid, who cares about our daughter.
When you establish your dominance at the shooting range...[rebelmouse-image 18353607 is_animated_gif=
I took my then gf, now wife's dad to the gun range and outshot him. He's an ex-military k9 handler. After that, I told him I was going to marry his daughter.
People typically think of cannabis legalization as one of those cut and dry things.
If you don't use marijuana, you probably don't want to legalize it.
If you do use marijuana, you are probably pro-legalization.
... except it's not that simple.
Reddit user SaifurCloudstrife asked:
"Redditors opposed to marijuana legalization and decriminalization: Why?"
Normally when these types of questions are asked, you get a bunch of people who are pro-the-thing chiming in and that absolutely happened here.
Interestingly, that opened up discourse that got people actually talking—probably more than they normally would have. The constant back and forth helped people get down to the core of their beliefs and reasons.
I can't say minds or hearts were changed, or even that people had particularly good reasons (and there were some not-great counter arguments, let's be real) when it came right down to it, but conversations were certainly had...
"It's a drug."
"I have two examples in my close family that clearly show how devastating pot can be. This attitude to marijuana reminds me of the attitude towards cocaine in the mid to late seventies when everyone thought it was harmless 'nose candy.' "
"I'm against sentences for drug possession but many people would benefit from dealers serving 3-5 for selling pot."
"Honestly, I think everyone against it should come to Canada for a visit. It's been legal here for 4 years and absolutely NONE of the spooky stories have come true."
"The only real differences is that people buy their weed in nice, clean stores with clear labels and not on street corners and our tax dollars don't go towards harassing people for a weekend indulgence."Giphy
"It stinks and makes people lazy."
"And often the weed smokers don't care if they are a pain in the butt to others and that kind of apathy is a huge no for me."Giphy
"I live in WA, where rec weed is legal."
"I rarely ever smell pot smoke. And I have the nose of a bloodhound."
"Yes, more often than as a teen when it was still illegal, but far less than any amount to be pro-prohibition about it."
"Plus, I mean, there's lots of smells I f*cking hate but wouldn't enact harmful laws over- Axe body spray being one."
"Laws can be made regarding where you can smoke."
"In Australia you can't smoke inside or within a certain distance to entryways. The only space you smell smoke is at an outdoor pub, designated smoking areas and occasionally when walking."
"It took years, but people become accustomed to new rules. Knowing Americans though, you guys will be on the brink of civil war if they brought in similar restrictions."
It's TOO Good
"I've read that the potency in pot these days is a hell of a lot stronger compared to say 20 or 30 yrs ago."
"The huge increase in THC levels should be a huge concern for people. The pot being legalized today is not the same I smoked when I was much younger."
"This argument has been rolled out again and again since I was in elementary school (~30 years ago) and I never understood it."
"THC is remarkably non-toxic, it's so much less toxic than many common substances people ingest on a regular basis (aspirin, and plenty of other OTC meds, as examples), to the point where actual THC toxicity is caused by physical rather than chemical/metabolic actions."
"Smoked cannabis is also much easier to titrate (dose appropriately), since the effects are nearly instantaneous - take a couple hits and you'll know if you've had enough within seconds."Giphy
"As opposed to an accidental edible overdose where you might not know for a couple hours that you've taken a heroic dose."
"So a higher % of THC by weight in cannabis flower shouldn't be an issue, especially considering that back in D.A.R.E. they used to tell us that smoking cannabis was SO MUCH WORSE than smoking tobacco."
"Cannabis was supposedly so much 'harsher,' one joint contains 'toxins' equivalent to an entire pack of cigs, etc...which is total bull, but even if that were true...wouldn't that mean that stronger cannabis is less harmful, since you don't have to smoke so much to achieve the desired effect?"
"Can't have it both ways."
It is high potency because it is illegal. It's easier to transport a half pound of skunk than 10 pounds of trash weed."
"Look at states that have legalized. There are low thc strains available and easily accessible."
"Because dipsh*ts will start smoking it in public places where others can not really avoid it, like is the case with cigarettes currently."
"Also yes: F*ck cigarettes."
"Yep my problem is drugs in public."
"I do not care if you do drugs as long as your doing them in a private place. I don't want to breathe in your smoke and get lung cancer."
"I don't especially care what folks get up to on their own, it's when they make everyone around them a participant that it aggravates me."
"Plus, depending on the setting, it's really inconsiderate."
"I have a friend whose job does random drug testing and he left a bar because a bunch of folks were smoking inside and he was worried about work."Giphy
Go Away, Government!
"I'm for legalization but as someone that worked for corporate cannabis, I'd loathe seeing those scums run the market."
"My state Governor tried writing a recreational cannabis bill on their own terms since we are surrounded by recreational territories."
"They stated they didn't want it to lead to a ballot measure because that's worst case scenario (didnt think voters were educated) than proceeded to write the most comically bad legalization bill that existed - before completely dropping it because they couldn't write a competent law."
"I am about as anti pot as they come, but if they are going to legalize it, why wouldn't they make it legal to grow your own? (Rhetorical- I know the answer… same reason "they" are legalizing it… tax money)"
"This is what I am screaming. For them it's only about money."
"They are waiting for the rich to install a profit making infrastructure before they let us peasants enjoy anything."Giphy
"If I had any good reason it's because idiots insist it's not addictive and it doesn't impede your senses. So they drive and do dangerous sh*t while high."
"My issue isn't the severity of the impediment. It's that people refuse to admit that it does alter the mind."
"I already have one person insist they smoke weed and drive because they know their body."
"Now imagine if someone openly said that about alcohol and how you'd react. It's a really dumb mentality to have."
"If anything I'd push for it to be illegalized ALONG WITH alcohol and cigarettes."
"But prohibition taught us that is not the way to go."Giphy
The Same Path As Alcohol
"I believe that if it was legalized, it would become a much bigger part in society, much like how alcohol is now."
"I do have a problem with public drinking and personally view alcohol as much worse compared to marijuana."
"However, since drinking is already so ingrained in our society, it's not like we can get rid of it. I'm just hoping that weed doesn't follow in the same path as alcohol."Giphy
"Im so sick of all these CBD oil pyramid schemes popping up!"
"The testimonials are all, 'I broke my spine in half and had to get it surgically fused together. Now all I have to do is rub a drop of CBD on it, and the pain is gone!' "
"And I'm not against it, I actually use high grade CBD at night to help me sleep. I fucking hate going through a rep though, they always try to hard sell me on topical CBD for my back pain that's like $80 for a little jar, or $30 bath bombs."
"I have discs squeezing out of my spine, I'm pretty sure a dab of hemp oil is gonna do jack shit for that."
"And the cancer patient abuse!"
"Smoking or ingesting edibles with THC for pain management and appetite is super helpful for cancer patients, but cbd wont do anything. Not to mention getting an ounce of good weed wont set you back much, but getting a tiny vial of cbd can set you back a couple hundred bucks."
"With our healthcare system in the states, we know damn well cancer patients are already in a hole of debt. I'm worried legalizing will encourage these CBD lies."
"It's the new snake oil."
"My MIL is that person. She's was touting its Indica strains ability to outright cure cancer the last I saw her."
"Cancer patients get hit very hard with the cannabis oil scams. What kind of evil sh*t do you need to be to take advantage of desperate people?"
"I agree with you about people thinking its the grand cure all, but that's why I feel we SHOULD legalize."
"The main reason I want it legalize is so they can do more research on the things it does help. It's effect on tremors alone is fascinating."Giphy
So what have we really learned here? I'm not really certain.
Lots of people's reasons seemed under-informed, but just as many people had legitimate concerns.
Sure, those concerns could just as easily be applied to alcohol, but lots of Redditors admitted that and seemed to take LARGER issue with alcohol than cannabis. It was honestly difficult to find anyone (aside from the smell people) who was 100% against it.
And that, dear reader, is possibly the biggest takeaway from this. Attitudes are changing.
Sorry, D.A.R.E.—looks like we said yes to drugs. Well, cannabis at least.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Chosen family is family. Sometimes they are the closest and most important family. Just because you share blood with someone, doesn't mean you have to form a bond.
That's why best friends are so important.
BFFs are forged in many ways. They're there for you in triumph and sorrow. They hold your hand. T
They know where the bodies are buried because they helped bury them. That's why it's so heartbreaking to lose them.
It's just a bitter pill to swallow when it's a relationship you thought was going to be endless.
Redditor FindingDale wanted to hear all the reasons why sometimes we just have to say goodbye to certain people in life, by asking:
How did you lose your best friend?
I've lost a few besties. Some through death. Some through personal growth and some just because it was time. That was an important lesson. Just like lovers, friends also outgrow one another.
I'm ExhaustedI Cant Modern Family GIF by HULUGiphy
"I got tired of it being all about her all of the time. I couldn't tell her anything in my life good or bad because she would make it about herself." ~ Wide-Fig-1063
"He was the passenger in a single-car accident. The driver was drunk, showing off, and drifting on an unfamiliar dirt road in California. They found the car at the bottom of a 70-foot cliff. Everyone in the car walked away except my friend, who died instantly."
"He was already passed out drunk himself so he likely didn't feel anything, but it was still such a terrible senseless way to go. That was 10 years ago last June. He was barely 21, the nicest guy you'd ever meet, and one hell of a bassist. Miss ya, Jake." ~ FormerLurker3
"Best friends since we were 12. Best Man at my wedding when we were 28. Day after the wedding he never spoke to me again. No explanation. Calls and texts went unanswered. He would avoid being at any social event I would be at, which was a few because we had the same circle of friends. Tried for two years to keep that friendship alive." ~ Tionek
"I had a weird dynamic to continue because of trauma. We had been friends for most of our lives (26 years) and every conversation was all about her. I was fine with that because she had a traumatic childhood and I knew she wasn't super socially with it. I'm happy to listen when my friends need it."
"Then she just unloaded on me saying I wasn't listening enough to her problems and how I had mistreated her by not asking enough pointed questions about abuse she had suffered as a kid. This was days after a three hour call where she did all the talking and it was mostly about her abuse."
"I was six months pregnant at the time and all I could think was "do I really have the bandwidth to take care of two babies?" I haven't spoken to her since." ~ keepinitcornmeal
It's WeirdFriends Tv GIFGiphy
"His wife tried to sleep with me. I didn't let it happen and I told him about it. They reconciled and had more kids, then it got weird whenever I was around so we drifted apart." ~ mycowild
Yeah, beware the partner of a loved one who is trying to trap you in a scandal. They are shady. Take that drama and run fast and far.
Why?Peering Looking GIF by MOODMANGiphy
"No idea. He slowly stopped answering calls, texts, emails... his wife, even more so. I'd occasionally stop by to see them and everything appeared to be OK. They never stopped to see us, even though his mother lived just a few miles away. I just quit trying." ~ NagromTrebloc
"It was October 16, 2015. I was working from home that day when I saw a call from him at around 9:15am. I had to ignore the call because I was in an online meeting. At 2pm my Dad calls my phone, which is unusual since he knows I'm working. I answer it."
"He is speaking quietly and very calmly. He says, "Son, I love you very much. I have some terrible news. Jared passed away this morning." Jared's wife was calling me from his phone to say she found him dead. I couldn't process what he was saying."
"I said, "That's not funny. Jared, his wife and me and my wife were supposed to meet up next weekend for dinner." Jared had sleep apnea surgery that same week. He had taken a painkiller and Benadryl together. It stopped his heart. He died 2 days before his 40th birthday. We were friends since grade school."
"We did everything together, he was my brother. He was the best man at my wedding earlier that year. I had just shared my son's heartbeat with him via a text message 2 days before. Jared was so excited to be his crazy uncle. I miss him every single day." ~ SnooCapers1425
"Codependency. I became basically obsessed with her and it just became too toxic. I had to cut it off because it was eating me up inside and she didn't deserve how I was treating her." ~ SuccessfulEggplant82
"Good on you for recognizing the problem you were having. It takes a lot (and I mean a crap ton) for an individual to come to this realization. Most people like to live in denial or fight it. I did the same thing and by the time I realized it, it was to late. I hope your able to get through it." ~ Nakanon85
"I noticed that he never came to my place to catch up. I stopped going over to his place to see how long until he noticed.... It's been 5 years now 🤷♂️." ~ Mr_Nonesuch
"Over the years I have observed in number of friendships that its always me that makes the call. They always are delighted to hear from me. If I organise something they come. They just don't make the effort. I have been best man five times so I don't think that its because the friendships are not valued. I don't know, am I missing something?" ~ Yarray2
"My ex wife. Even after we split we stayed close, co-parenting, helping each other out. She died 3.5 years ago. I could have made peace I think but after her death and our daughter was living with me full time I found out about how abusive my ex had been to her when I was around and it felt like losing her all over."
"Like I thought I knew who she was in the 13 years we'd had both together and separated, but it turns out I knew nothing. Now I'm just angry about it, like how dare you get to do this crap and then leave me to clean up your mess."
"How dare you have peace when my daughter has nothing but struggles and therapy. I felt like we were robbed of the good person, the good mother I thought she was." ~ Scarecrowqueen
Far Far Away...Jake Gyllenhaal Reaction GIF by MOODMANGiphy
"Friend moved to the other side of the planet, with their spouse, to be nearer to both their families. I never understood what real friendship was before friend was in my life; and now they're alive, but not here." ~ ClutchCrgo
One of the natural parts of life... saying goodbye. Or in some cases getting ghosted and forgotten. Either way, chin up.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Humans have had an undeniably significant impact on our environment and the other species that inhabit the planet with us.
What might happen if humans weren't here to exert that influence, though?
What if we never had?
Reddit user Mompkey asked:
"Which species do you think would be dominant if humans didn't exist?"
"Wolves. They can, and have, successfully adapted to most of the various biomes on the planet."
"There's a reason we domesticated them and took them everywhere with us."Giphy
- Everything is garbage
- Garbage is delicious"
"I would agree, but now I'm wondering if our presence is the reason cockroaches have thrived as well as they have."Giphy
"Sharks, they are the dominant species on 3/4 of the Earth's surface already, they have survived mass extinctions and would thrive even more without humans mucking up their habitat."Giphy
"Humans are the only species that seek to dominate others. Other animals just want to live in the balance of nature. They're just trying to survive, they don't have time to take over the world."
"Pinky and The Brain theme song played in my head."Giphy
"We've killed off so many throughout history but of the ones that remains intelligence and versatility would be the key factors. Their food supply and habitat would greatly increase in our absence so with this being said.........primates."
"We are simply the superior primate therefore we are the dominant species. That opposable thumb is a mf when you have a large brain."
"Wouldn't it be just another off shoot of humans like the Neanderthal or heidelbergensis?"Giphy
While we'll probably never know definitively which species would truly thrive without us around, it's still fun to speculate.
Do you have thoughts?
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.