Twins are a tricky thing to manage. Not only are you getting two kids with the expectation of one, but that means twice as much baby supplies, twice as many colleges to pay for, and, oh, also, that thing where the twins form a psychic link in the womb. That's real, right? However, the biggest challenge for first time parents of multiples might be telling them apart. How do you do it?
Reddit user, u/katley1, wanted to know what the best tell apart tricks are when they asked:
Who's The Smaller Chunk?
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Often there is a weight difference at birth which persists for some time.
That'll get you through the nugget phase without an accidental swap. I have no idea what you do once they are basically the same size and start actively working together, though.
Rely On The Memory Of Others
My mom couldn't tell my twin (non-identical but very similar looking) brothers apart when they were born for a month or so, luckily the rest of the family could and had to tell her when she needed to know
Color Code Them, Like File Folders
My cousin had twins, one had a name that rhymed with a colour, so she painted that one's nails in that colour, until they grew old enough that she could tell without needing to look.
A Rotating Set Of Jewelry
My twin and I aren't identical but we sure look like it. I've always asked my mom this question and she said she knows 100% we are who we are because when we got home from the hospital she kept our hospital bracelets on for weeks. Everyday she would looks us over trying to find any difference in us, any freckle or dimple. Something to tell us apart.
And when she found something she took the bracelets off and gave us small little beaded bracelets. And once those got too small she pierced our ears, I had diamond earrings and my sister had pearls. She swears to this day, she can tell us apart with her eyes closed. (Which is totally true. We tested it way too many times)
Just Grab A Pen
No joke, my mom sharpie'd a "P" on my brother Pat's foot.
But after a while, it didn't matter. Another person said it here, but the weight difference persists. His twin brother was and remained considerably bigger than he was.
Nothing Like Good Practice
Apparently, my sister's face is more round than mine (mine is more oval-ish), and when we were born my mom just straight up [stared] at us in the hospital until she could tell us apart.
In Womb Sabotage
I had a girlfriend with 9 fingers. She was very petite, around 90lbs. She told me her mom was the same build as her when she got pregnant with twins.
So in the womb, my gfs sisters foot pushed on her left hand, therefore her pinky finger just didn't develop. When I asked if her sister had a deformity, she said, "no, that b-tch"
Study Like A Scientist
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When they were first born, my husband intently studied them, looking for any difference. They were .25" and 1 oz apart at birth, so we didn't have the luxury of a weight discordance. Twin B had folded cartilage on his left ear due to his location in-utero. Once that subsided, Twin B's stork bite became inflamed, while Twin A's did not.
That got us through until about 18 months. Now, they have slightly different head shapes, but Twin B has a freckle under his right ankle.
Also, from the beginning, we always kept Twin A on the left and Twin B on the right and assigned them colors. It's the only way I know who is who in pictures.
...And Sometimes, You Never Know For Sure
Identical twin here. And when I say identical, I mean my-sister-and-I-can't-tell-ourselves-apart-in-some-pictures identical. My mom doesn't even know which one of us is older. We were born via c-section within the same minute. The only reason I'm listed as older on my birth certificate is because they legally needed something to differentiate us on our birth certificates beyond just our names and mine comes first in alphabetical order. My sister and I have names that are associated with colors, so my mom colored our big toe nails with sharpies when we were babies.
As we got older, she said I just started responding to one name and my sister to the other, so that's* what names we have. We don't know if we actually respond to the correct names, but we don't ever plan on looking into it. She sometimes still doesn't know who is talking on the phone when we are in the same room. We are now in our 20s.
3.
I knew a set of identical-looking triplets growing up. Their mom dressed them in matching outfits and had a different colored hair tie for each of them. I kid you not, these girls were still wearing matching outfits and their respective hair ties the last time I saw them, at 18. egghead425
Baby X....
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Not me but my mother in law... My husband's brothers are twins... And though she always told them she knew who was who... she confessed to me she thinks she got them switched somewhere in their childhood... Baby x had a little birth mark on his cheek... Now not x, but y has a Birthmark... She hid every photo album she has... and this is now a secret between me and my MIL. Yasminerose
Assigned Colors.
I'm not a parent, but I do have an identical twin. My parents always told us whenever the question came up that once they brought us home they assigned us different colors (My sister was blue and I was pink) and they painted our nails until they could tell the difference. Sometimes my sister and I joke about our names getting switched in the hospital but I think they put name tags on us. yoimteesdale
Switching Bracelets....
I worked with a girl who told me the story of her friend that managed to have identical triplets, or as close as those can be. After they were born the doctors gave them each a medical alert bracelet to keep on so that the family could tell the three girls apart. Almost a year later and the parents were still relying on those bracelets to tell their kids apart.
The parents let the triplets stay at a grandma's house, and during a bath, she took the bracelets off and forgot which one belonged to which child. The grandmother only told the parents about this months later and to this day the parents are unsure which child is which. IntrepidRoyal
Who is Who?
Mother of identical twin girls. now 22yrs old.
At birth they literally weighed the same. But Baby B had bruising on her forehead from delivery. We used that for the first week along with their hospital bracelets for two weeks. Then we tied a different colored cloth ribbon around their ankles for a few weeks.
We could find no differing mark, mole, freckle, nothing to distinguish them apart. Afraid the ribbon would fall off and cause a choking hazard as they began to move around, at 6 weeks old we had their ears pierced. One with gold balls, the other with silver. Real jewelry and safety backings that would not fall off.
They wore that until about 3 years old. By then, attitudes and personalities began to appear and it was obvious who was who.
The fear in the beginning of mixing them up was real. never_change27
Nailed.
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We put blue fingernail polish on the big toe of one of them just in case. Their head shapes are different because my wife labored the first one for 3+ hours, the second one's heart rate dipped so they expedited his delivery so his is more round. To me they look entirely different, but other people who aren't around them 24/7 can't tell them apart. That doesn't mean I don't get them mixed up fro time to time at certain angles, but straight on I can tell them apart. Juvat
Toed.
My brothers are identical twins. When they were born, my mom painted the toenails pink for one of them while they were in the hospital with the ID bands still on. One of them had pink toenails for the first two years of his life.
You can tell them apart easily if you know them, my mom just didn't ever want to get them switched up by mistake. One has a slightly chunkier face compared to the other. Looking at baby pictures, you can easily tell which is which. Typhun
The Buttcheek....
Not a parent but my cousins are twins and one of them had a birth mark on his right buttcheeck, no one noticed until a year later lol. Citharae_
After a few weeks....
I kept the hospital bracelets on for maybe 1-2 weeks but after having them home for a bit, I could just tell, I could even tell their cries apart. When you're with them 24/7 it's easier. It took my husband a little while longer but, he was working and I was home with them.
But parents of triplets and more that are identical, I know sometimes they paint a toenail or something like that to help, I know if they're was more than 2, I would need something too. pickmeacoolname
Swapped.
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My sisters in law are twins and I asked this question to my mother in law.
She said they probably did get swapped at some point or another 🤷🏼♀️ she also seemed unbothered by it.
Her daughters weren't unbothered though. templenameis_beyonce
While the controversial topic is justifiably subject to condemnation, the show delicately depicted each characters' emotional turmoil and their families in the aftermath.
While many in these types of forbidden relationships don't end well, Redditor Sadebiru was curious to hear from those familiar with the situation and asked:
"[Serious] Redditors who slept with their teachers, what was the fallout after it happened?"
Consequences
These Redditors faced immediate disciplinary consequences for their involvement in their respective intimacies, but one suffered emotional trauma for years.
The Trauma Of Being Used
"My English teacher used me as a sperm donor. She slept with me until she got pregnant and then stopped. She didn't even bother to switch schools so I wouldn't know. This was about 50 years ago and it still crosses my mind and bothers me. So the fallout on my side was being mentally messed up for about 4 years and not being able to have a normal sexual relationship for a long time."
– readit2U
Predatory Soccer Coach
"I had a very inappropriate relationship with the assistant soccer coach. His contract was not renewed the next year and I was the subject of gossip, obviously, and labeled the school sl*t by my classmates. It was a very small private school so there was literally no way to keep anything secret. It was only later on I realized he'd taken advantage of me and was, obviously, a sicko who knew I'd fall for the flattery of an older guy the rest of the girls on the team thought was cute."
Sleeping With The P.E. Teacher
"My cousin Adrian slept with the physical education teacher. It was in the mid 1980s, and it right near the end of the school year. She was immediately transferred and he lost his school reference and was suspended for the remainder of the year, which was like four weeks from memory."
"he was no angel. He was an absolute player and he said he has no ill feelings about the whole thing at all. It didn't affect his schooling any further after that and he said he absolutely seduced her, it wasn't the other way around."
Left "Morally Conflicted" About Taking Action
"It was horrible. I was groomed by my English teacher. He said all the right things and I thought I was emotionally mature enough to handle it. I was not."
"I realized when I was 19 how messed up it was and very quietly told the bishop and the Victims of Sexual Misconduct Councilor (catholic school). My worst fear was that it was going to be a big public scandal and I didn't want my family's name dragged through the mud. So he permanently lost his teaching license."
"He is now dating a woman and I want to reach out to her so bad to her to ask if she knows, but at the same time I want that chapter of my life to end. I'm very morally conflicted."
– DeezMags
No Fallout
Instead of suffering a fallout per se, the following Redditors reflected fondly back on their romantic affairs.
Consenting Adults
"Nothing since I was 6 years out of high school by that point."
"We became friends a couple years after I graduated, eventually I told her I had something of a crush on her, she thought it was cute and flattering and sat on it for a while. One day she invites me out and we meet up, have a good time, we leave. Later that night she texts me when I'm work says she's got feelings too and wants to pursue it."
"We go on a couple more dates, see a movie (The Watch for those wondering), make out in her car afterwards like a couple horny teenagers. We do the deed that night, good times."
"Anyway, the age gap was something she couldn't get over, I was 25 and she was 48, different places in our lives with different goals. We still chat though."
The Chinese Teacher
"She was my Chinese teacher at a Confucius Institute, and is almost 10 years older than me, but I always had a minor crush on her."
"When her contract was about to expire and had to leave my country, we went out to dinner. She was leaving for one last trip before returning to China, so this would be the last time I would see her. I decided to take a shot and told her about my crush. We slept together that night."
"There wasn't really a fallout. We are still in contact, but don't really talk about that night."
Good Memory
The following academic flings were either highly erotic or wound up being blissful.
"Too Riskey To Continue"
"A few people found out and gave me sh*t about it, but really not a big deal for me personally. It was obviously more difficult for her. Rumours got back to other teachers who were not cool with it and she had some awkward conversations to navigate with the headteacher. She admitted we saw each other outside of school but denied anything sexual, which they did not seem to believe. She was told never to be alone with me and had restrictions placed on her ability to act as a chaperone on school trips etc."
"It didn't last as it was obvious it was too risky to continue but there was no bad feeling between us."
The French Teacher
"I slept with my French teacher about 5 years after leaving school, she was just as as I'd always imagined."
"Afternoon Office Nookie"
"It was in college, we slept together before we knew I was in her class. It was one of those lecture only classes with like 200 students in it so it wasn't a big deal."
"No fallout beyond some late afternoon office nookie now and then."
"She would text me pictures of what she was wearing under her outfit that day. I miss being young."
"The Best Thing That Ever Happened"
"I started dating the grad student that was teaching one of my undergrad classes, although because I took time off before going to uni and he started early I was actually older than him."
"The uni had rules against the sort of thing, of course. We weren't found out until the spring quarter, at which time we were told to cease and desist, but by the time this happened we were engaged."
"The administration were happy for us (and we were all friends there, the department was like one big family), so instead they told us that for the rest of the year my exams and juries would have to be handled by another professor and that our class sessions would be recorded to be sure there was no funny business or nepotism."
"20 years on, we're still married - it was the best thing that ever happened to either of us!"
In rare cases, some students have glorified their dalliances with teachers and bragged about their conquests among their peers.
Some – as those participating in this thread – expressed the absence of fallout or lack of emotional trauma.
But let's make one thing clear: a teacher having sexual relations with a minor student is considered illegal by the law and court opinion in most states, and children under the age of 18 cannot give consent to sexual conduct.
An improper relationship with a student can lead to a criminal conviction and imprisonment.