Kids say some seriously whacky stuff sometimes, it can be disturbing, especially when they tend to discuss people who are not there. When the imagination is heading into "The Sixth Sense" territory, it may be time for a visit to the therapist. Now almost all of us had imaginary friends at one point in life. It is a very normal, common part of childhood. But much like the real friends in corporeal form we make in life, sometimes certain relationships are toxic and not a good influence. And separation is called for.
Redditor u/xX_ENTROPY_Xx wanted to hear about people's children's besties that they haven't laid eyes on by asking..... What's the scariest story you heard a child tell about their "imaginary friend"?
Hit the Road Jack
Terrifying Trick Or Treat GIF by CameoGiphyMy oldest when she was 4. She had an imaginary friend named Jack who lived under our back porch. And he liked to shove sticks down people's throats. I discouraged playtime with Jack.
Monkey & Cowboy
My son was 2-3 and always had a bunch of imaginary friends. The most frequently mentioned were Monkey boy and the cowboy. When my son was 2 he woke up one night screaming. I ran in his room and he was terrified. He kept pointing at the corner and saying that Monkey boy was bad. I ended up picking my son up and putting him in bed to sleep with me. The next time he was 3 and we were taking a walk with his younger sister in the stroller.
I'm pushing the stroller and he's walking just behind me. He keeps saying " owww stop it" or " please stop! " I keep looking behind me at him and see nothing. I stop and ask him what's hurting him. He says " the cowboy is hurting me mommy" I tell him that there is no cowboy by us. He says " yes there is. It's the cowboy in my head" kids are creepy sometimes.
Mean Don....
When my daughter was a toddler she randomly started talking about a man named Don. She always described him the same way and didn't seem scared at all, despite bringing him up every day. She didn't go to daycare and we didn't know anyone named Don. Then one day she got completely freaked out, wouldn't walk around the house alone in case she ran into Don, wouldn't sleep in her own room, and would talk about how she hated him because he said "mean words" to her all the time. About a year into "mean Don" we bought a new house. Once we moved she never spoke of him again.
Ganga
creepy toilet GIFGiphyMy son had this imaginary friend - Ganga. She lived in the nearby pond, had duck feet, hair all over her face, ate through a slit in her neck and we were expecting her any minute for dinner.
He was totally chill with this horrific monster idea, yet he had recurring nightmares about a puppy coming into his room. Kids are weird.
Humpty?
My youngest niece had an imaginary friend and when my sister told me about it she said "ask her what she looks like"
"Ok, what's she look like?"
"Broken pieces."
"...Oh.. why's she broken sweetie?"
"She fell from our tree"
Nope. Sorry sis you're on your own.
Mooky likes to Watch
My cousin was a few years younger than me and he had an imaginary friend called 'Mooky'.
Mooky wasn't human, but some kind of alien/monster thing.
Used to freak me out when I'd hear a noise behind me at my grandparents house and my cousin would calmly say "It's only Mooky, he just wants to see you."
I Know Her
So maybe not scary but definitely weird.
When I was little I claimed to have an imaginary friend, who had light brown hair and wore a night gown, and she had stars for eyes.
Well, my niece was living at my old childhood home and she told me that she has a friend who misses me and she asked why I went away. When I asked who, she described my old imaginary friend. It was super spooky.
Edit: I have been informed that this is scary, my apologies.
In the Fire
evil smile GIFGiphyMy cousin had an imaginary friend who she said used to live in the fireplace and "was red and patchy" - as if she was burnt. Apparently she was a little girl who wore funny clothes that "looked like olden day clothes". Still spooks me out!
The Lonely
My son stopped talking to his imaginary friend for months after my nephew, who was 15, took his own life. My son, who was not quite 5, was the apple of his eye. My nephew treated my son like a little brother, and since his mom watched my son while I worked, they spent tons of time together.
I had simply told my son his cousin was sick from sadness and he'd died. I would remind him every time before we went to their house so he wouldn't pester my sister about where he was. One day he said "Mom, you keep saying he's not here anymore, but he IS. He sits on my bed before I go to sleep and talks to me." He would NOT be dissuaded. This went on for months. He knew things we did not speak about around him that happened.
My nephew's grandpa on his dad's side passed a few months later. That's when my son told me his cousin told him he wouldn't be able to visit anymore. He was going on a train with his grandpa, and they couldn't come back again. Last thing he told him was to never play with guns, they weren't safe. My nephew took his life with a handgun. Wigged me the hell out.
Bless Us
The Exorcist GIF by filmeditorGiphyA kid said he didn't want to go to church because "my invisible friend says he cant follow me in there."
Ricky
Bro, me.
His name was Ricky, he lived in the mirrors and wouldn't let me change. I vividly remember saying something along the lines of, "Ricky, please don't watch me while I'm changing", "Ricky, go to a different mirror, I have to take a bath".
Like, what???
"orange doggie"
My son was two, he started to cry in the middle of the night and say an "orange doggie" was under his cot. This went on for at least a month, he would describe the Orange doggie as having sharp teeth, stealing his dummies and biting his lips and face until there was blood. He's 16 now and still remembers it vividly.
Who she is?
Old Lady Wine GIF by MattielGiphyMy friend's kids used to wake up at night and tell us there is an old lady in their bedroom. Freaking best not be.
Paris Jaris
My youngest sister(4 at the time) had an imaginary friend named Paris Jaris. My dad had built her a small playhouse in our backyard where my mom could see and hear her while she was in the kitchen. My sister would have tea parties and such with her imaginary friend. One day mom heard her say "don't worry, as long as I'm alive they won't hurt you." She paused and said "well if you do that then I can't help you, it's not nice to kill people."
When my mom asked her what that was about my sister said "sometimes I have to tell Paris to be a nice person or he can't visit anymore." We moved not to long afterwards and she didn't get a new playhouse.
Framed Harold
My when my cousin and I were kids she casually mentioned she had a "friend named Harold who lived in the picture frames. Their entire hallways was lined with picture frames, and she would always hold her breath when she walked by them. Anyway one day we were hanging out in their unfinished basement and she pointed to a beam in the far back corner and stated very bluntly that "That's where Harold sleeps."
She's Gone
When my son was 3-4 he started talking about his wife. He would say she was outside, and very sad. I remember him putting his hand on his heart and saying he missed her, but we couldn't let her in- she needed to move on.
Ms. Mim...
I have a younger relative who used to talk about her imaginary friend, Ms. Mim.
Ms. Mim looks down on everyone, not because she's arrogant but because she is always floating high up on the ceiling.
Ms. Mim is always wearing her favorite white dress and holding a big clear towel (a wedding dress and veil).
Ms. Mim's neck is always bent.
Ms. Mim cries a lot.
Ms. Mim hates our grandma.
When we mentioned this to grandma, she told us she had a friend who hanged herself in her wedding dress after her groom left her at the altar.
I asked that same relative if she remembers Ms. Mim, but all she could recall was that weird crying she heard sometimes.
Holy Water Needed
black and white samara morgan GIFGiphy"I'm talking to Ms. Lady."
"Who's Ms. Lady?"
"The white lady with black eyes and long fingernails!"
Cue me searching for the nearest exorcist.
In the Attic...
CONTEXT: My bedroom was in the attic...
When my brother was 4 he told me about the man who lived in the attic. Apparently he would hear someone walking around in the attic when I wasn't in there. He said he'd seen someone's head poking out of the hatch watching him at night, and that he was sorry he'd been too scared to do anything about the man in my bedroom.
If that wasn't bad enough one time I was hanging out in his room one day when he went quiet out of no where and when I asked what was wrong he said "he's back" and I swear to god I heard footsteps coming from the attic.
I no longer live with them. I was talking to the same brother (now aged 10) about him taking the bigger attic bedroom now it's empty. My youngest brother (5) immediately answered, "but where will the man live?"
Green means Go
fred savage zombie GIF by What Just Happened??!GiphyMy son has always talked about "the green lights that come visit him".
4yr old: The green lights came to me again last night.
Us: Oh, OK. Are they friendly?
4yr old: They don't have mouths.
... Sometimes they go into your room.
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“'Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience'.” What's your best real life example of this?"
They Literally Won't be "Shut Down"
"When I tell people to just reboot your computer and it will fix all their problems and yet they won't because they said if you wait long enough it will shut down, when in reality it only goes to sleep."
"Then when I tell them they have to completely shut it down they look at me like I'm an idiot and say they did."
"I tell them it seems like it but it only went to sleep."
"They argue back."- niallaa
Some People Just Don't Get It...
"I used to argue a lot with my sister when we were kids."
"She would do this thing where she would say something, and then I would reference back to it literally a minute or two later to prove a point and she would say 'I never said that' or 'that’s not what I said'."
"Absolutely impossible to argue with someone who will just deny having said things that could hurt their argument."
"Also, trying to change the course of an argument if they feel like they are 'losing'."
"A coworker once called me an idiot for doing something 'incorrectly' when I was actually doing it the right way."
"When I politely explained to them that the way they suggested doing the task didn’t actually work, they started asking 'why are you getting so angry?? I was just trying to help' etc."
"So now we’re arguing about whether I’m angry or not instead of the right way to complete the task."- themightypianocat
Facts Are Facts...
"Arguing is pointless if you do not agree on a set of facts."- niallaa
Facts GIF by Judge JerryGiphyYou Can't Have It Both Ways...
"For a short while, I worked as a line cook at a Cracker Barrel, and there was a little saloon style door that led to the staff section (kitchen, bathroom, etc)."
"There was a staff only sign on the door, above the doors, and on the wall behind the doors at eye level."
"Usually if someone from the customer side comes in, they said, 'Coming in' before opening the door, so they didn't hit anyone, but of course customers didn't know that."
"So when this dude opened the door and hit a waitress carrying a ton of drinks, we were reasonably upset with him."
"He said, ;You should really put a sign up'."
"We showed him all the signs, and he goes, 'That seems a bit excessive'."- GreyFoxHound1
So Wrong.
"Had an employee sign an NDA about an upcoming art installation that had investors."
"He told everyone."
"He argued with me the NDA only meant he couldn’t disclose anything with the people in the company."- BosskHogg
He Knew What He Was Talking About
This was best said:
“'Never wrestle with pigs'."
"'You both get dirty and the pig likes it'.― George Bernard Shaw"- Zerowantuthri·
pigs GIFGiphySome Outdated Inventions Are Definitely Not Missed...
"I’m showing my age here but I used to work for an estate agency, and we had sales offices set up at the site of large new housing developments."
"Our primary method of communication was fax."
"One of the sales associates telephoned our office to say that the fax machine had run out of paper."
"No problem, I said, one of the guys is coming your way later for a house tour, I’ll give him a box of paper to give to you."
"We then had an almost 20 minute long argument when they kept insisting 'NO, YOU JUST SEND ME A BLANK FAX BECAUSE I NEED THE PAPER, IT WILL JUST COME OUT OF MY FAX MACHINE'.”
"It was like trying to nail jelly to a tree."
"Difficult, irritating, and it achieved nothing."- BettieKat
Very Few Hills Are Worth Dying On...
"I had a friend in university who was a world-class high school debater."
"Over meals, she liked to pick a ridiculous proposition and then talk circles around people until they had to concede to her point, no matter how absurd."
"When she tried it with me, I just stonewalled her."
"Met every point with a solid 'I don't think that's true'." or 'That doesn't make sense'."
"Eventually she gave up and never tried it with me again."
"It was the only time I've ever used the tactics of the stupid to win an argument."
"But, to be fair, if you're not arguing with me in good faith, I feel no obligation to respond in good faith."- kitskill
IS The Customer Always Right?...
"Working retail."
"Especially when I worked in the tech shop or a computer store."
" Trying to convince someone their $500 laptop is never going to be a gaming system no matter how many of the very few replaceable parts we throw at it can be exhausting."- MOS95B
happy episode 7 GIFGiphyEducation Only Matters If You Learned Something....
"Was arguing with this dude about something math-related."
"He didn’t know how to read a study that involved statistics. claimed he was in multiple AP math classes."
"Tried saying that I 'probably don’t even know basic integration'."
"Gave me a common integration problem."
"He wrote it but forgot the minus sign, making it unsolvable."
"I pointed it out and he edited the comment to make it correct."
"Told him that some people can see when you edit comments."
"He claimed that he just capitalized a letter. on and on and on."- SaturdayNightCity
Good Legal Counsel Might Be Worth The Splurge...
"I asked a representative from the Friend of the Court to explain something she said and she told me that I understood what she was saying."
"I replied that I wouldn't have asked her to explain if I had understood."
"She said if I was going to be difficult, she would hold me in contempt."
"My X chimed in that she didn't quite understand what she had said and was greeted with a smile and an explanation."
"From that point on I always disagreed with the Friend of the Court on EVERYTHING, so that I could be seen by the 'Actual Court' and a Judge."- PURPLEPEE
Season 4 Episode 21 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphySore Winners Are No More Attractive Than Sore Losers...
"Once worked with a guy who, by his own admission, got his rocks off by picking fights."
"He'd start an argument over the smallest thing."
"If you said it was white, he'd say it was black, just to try to start something."
"The one that always stood out for me was the weather app competition."
"One day he asked me what temperature it was, so I read it off my weather app."
"He got all offended, because his weather app said it was a couple degrees warmer."
"So he decides we're going to have a weather app competition."
"He was going to chart what our apps said the temperature was, and at the end of the week, whichever one was closest to that day's high would be the winner."
"And the loser would have to start using the winner's app."
"To which I said, "What is your f*cking problem?'"
"So, yeah."
"For the first few days, he'd make a big performance about marching into my office, recording the temperature off my app, jotting down some notes, and walking off."
"This started on a Monday."
"He gave up after Wednesday."
"Either because I was winning, or he was disappointed because, despite his best efforts, I just did not give a f*ck about weather apps."
"Or maybe the boss told him to stop because I filed a complaint that this was bordering on harassment."- originalchaosinabox
Im Always Right GIF by ZionGiphyIt should perhaps be said calling someone an idiot, or even thinking it, is not a particularly nice thing to do.
Even so, if you're tempted to do so when you're in the presence of a particular individual, probably best not to provoke them.
After all, if you're so determined to "win," does it really make you any better than them?