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Parents Break Down The Moment They Realized It Wasn't Hormones, Their Kids Are Just Jerks

Parents Break Down The Moment They Realized It Wasn't Hormones, Their Kids Are Just Jerks
Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

I grew up watching Turner Classic Movies. One of my favorites? Mervyn LeRoy's The Bad Seed, one of the top American films of 1956. The film, based on the bestselling novel by William March, is about a fragile housewife who slowly begins to suspect that her precocious eight-year-old daughter is murdering people in town. The film has served as the inspiration for other films about killer kids ranging from 1981's Bloody Birthday to 1993's The Good Son and 2009's Orphan.

But we're not talking about killer kids here... hopefully your own child doesn't grow up to burn someone alive in a basement. What if your child grows up to be, you know, just a jerk, and then maybe, just maybe, far more than that? After Redditor Fred-the-human asked the online community, "Parents, when did you realize it wasn't teenage hormones and your kid is a legitimate butthole?" parents (and others) shared their stories.


"My wife wasn't connecting the dots."

It's my stepson.

My wife wasn't connecting the dots. I finally pointed out that he's 30 which is how old I was when we got married. He's got no skills and no education and no career prospects but he does have a bunch of felonies. That got the wheels spinning but when she was taking our daughter for a walk with some little kids that they were babysitting they found him passed out in a car in the side of the road, obviously coming down from whatever he was on she finally got it. So she kicked him out and he threw a big tantrum and smashed stuff and cussed her out on his way out the door.

I let her know that if she ever tries to move him into the house again, I'm grabbing our daughter and moving out and that it won't be a discussion.

alboolshile

"He only realized it..."

Not me, but my grandfather recently learned the true colors of his narcissistic son (my uncle) after fifty years. He only started realizing after my grandmother passed away this year and my uncle has been a total piece of s*** to my grandfather. It's sad that it took so long and it is now driving a rift between my uncle and my grandfather.

Terrible-Charity

"If his mother won't do what he wants..."

I knew my stepson was lying all the time within a couple of months of his mother and I getting married. My ex-best friend from HS was a lot like him on the lying part.

Couple of years later, he kicks in our back door after going missing for a week (he's 15 at this point), and steals electronics. Cops called, he's apprehended 30 minutes later headed for the pawn shop. My wife still isn't accepting reality at this point. He spends 6 weeks locked up in a boot-camp style facility. Comes back, is like a different person for less than a week. His birthday comes around, he goes off the rails, locked up for 6 months.

He's been in and out of the county jail for the last 7 years. He's a sociopath. He can emulate feelings, but has no real connection to people. He wants what he wants and if he has to take from someone else, so be it. If his mother won't do what he wants, he gets emotionally abusive. Until last summer when he put her in the hospital. I officially disowned him, and she agreed. For about 3 months. She just won't defend herself. I have to be a major ahole about it to try to protect her. She still went over $5K in debt for him and the 3rd baby by the 3rd baby momma. Our relationship rides on a thin razor's edge when it comes to him.

Rex9

"The middle one is constantly belittling her sister..."

My oldest daughter has a learning disability. My middle daughter is in Pre AP classes. The middle one is constantly belittling her sister fir not knowing certain things. She walks around with this I'm better than you attitude. We didn't raise her that way. My wife will tell her bluntly to stop being terrible to her sister.

awesomemofo75

"My mother finally cut my brother off..."

My mother finally cut my (47) brother off after 25 years. She gave him 2k a month or more, and still pays his cell bill. I told her if she wanted to tear through every cent she had and then complain that he made no effort to call her (unless the check was late), I was bailing out of the picture. She also realized his unemployed @ss was too busy to help take care of her. I think she knew years ago he was a lazy manipulative person, but he's the baby and she could never say no. Anyway, f*** my family.

hyper-spermia

"We found out..."

Adding this to stress medical issues: My son was a legitimate butthole for most of his teenage years. Terrorized his younger brother, had to argue about everything! He saw his pediatrician regularly and a psychiatrist. In his late teens, he suffered with depression and anxiety. I asked his new doctor (adult primary care physician) to run thyroid tests. I had depression and anxiety at his age and wasn't tested until I was 24. I found out that I have hypothyroidism.

We found out that although his thyroid was ok, he had a very strange level of testosterone. Very low. Once he started replacement therapy, his attitude, depression, and anxiety all improved!

His doctor told me that she wouldn't have even thought about testing him because of his age but she was glad that I had pushed for it.

dreams_child

"In all honesty..."

In all honesty waaaaaaay before they were even teenagers.

My stepson and daughter are one of the significant reasons that I'm planning to end my relationship with their mother.

They are 10 and 12, I've known them since they were 6 and 8.

I've tried really hard to engage with them and parent them as equally as I do my own children, but they just don't get it.

Their mother treats them like they're little angels whilst they sit on their arses all day glued to screens. They're a couple of years behind the usual in reading and in maths and I'd hoped to use lockdown as an opportunity to get them up to speed but it was thrown back at me with surly behaviour and non-engagement, I received no support from their mother so I ended up giving up as it was pretty obvious I was wasting my time.

I've come to realise two things, you can't educate pork and you can't help those who won't help themselves.

Arnold-Archenfhart

"Watching them figure it out..."

My parents didn't realize until my sister was 30. Watching them figure it out was heartbreaking. For years it was "oh, you all do it to each other" and suddenly it was "oh, this isn't a healthy relationship for any of us" real quick. They realized we hadn't been exaggerating about anything, but she had flat out been lying for years. They stopped putting up with her s***, she chose to cut contact with all of us, got even madder when we all said we'd give her the space she wanted, she wanted us to "fight for her." Mum is the only one who talks to her now. Plus side, my parents, other sister and I have the best familial relationship we've ever had.

turtledove93

"She used her diagnosis..."

My sister would always explode at the drop of a hat, destroy everything, get extremely violent, etc. She'd see things and get increasingly paranoid. Eventually she began to self medicate with drugs and alcohol.

Later in life, I convinced her to get help and she was diagnosed with bipolar and schizophrenia. (Duh.) At that point I was like, "oh she really can't help it. Things will get better now!"

Ha. No.

She used her diagnosis to doctor shop and find one who prescribes things to her that get her high, but exacerbate her symptoms. She uses her diagnosis as an excuse to be absolutely awful and abuse people. She's in and out of jail and constantly fighting with someone. Still took me until this year to realize that that's who she is and to give up. Sometimes you just really wanna believe you can love the evil out of someone.

Psychological_Sea829

"She doesn't understand..."

My daughter is five and she's stone cold. She doesn't understand the meaning of the words she uses, but she knows the effect they will have on people. We're legit worried about what happens when the hormones show up.

EddieMcClintok

"Not that she did anything terrible..."

My step sister has always been incredibly lazy and worked harder to not do housework than actually help out. She would throw tantrums to not go to school, not wash dishes, and everyone just kind of let it off as hormones. I always ended up doing all her chores.

Not that she did anything terrible like some poeple in this thread, but one thing she did was lie. She lied a lot and one of them split my family apart and drove my step-moms depression and bipolar disorder over the edge. She also just had no opinion or good characteristics. I always say, she is a blank canvas that everyone else paints on. Especially her mother. Her mother thinks she is the most amazing person in the world, better than my brother and I, who both work and have a life of our own.

She wrote a letter to my father years later when he left the house basically blaming him for her depression and everything that went wrong in the family, another lie. Ive known this girl since i was 11. Became my sister and yet she threw us under the bus for nothing. Luckily I have a half sister with much better qualities than her who loves and adores my brother and I.

Fyi. Now she is 23, dropped out of College, no potential, engaged and all she wants to do is sit at home and do nothing.

JJHookg

"She was two years older..."

My sister is a pretty terrible person. We were raised the same way - fairly open. I had absolutely no restrictions: I could have girls in my room, I had absolutely no curfew, my parents even thought I went to one of my friend's house to smoke pot and let me (we actually stayed up all night playing Halo in a cabin, so my eyes were red and I smelled like I tried to cover up any smell using fireplace smoke).

She was two years older and had more restrictions placed on her due to her doing things like sneaking out and driving home drunk.

They probably could have punished her more when we were children. She would always start the fights, and when we were left alone in the house she would sadistically attack me. She would pound on my door for hours, and since I didn't have a lock I needed to sit in front of it holding it shut. I don't really blame them though, as there was no way for them to know..what I wouldn't have gave for a video recording device like every kid has now.

Anyways, I think some people are just going to be bad people, and there's not much you can do about it. She genuinely takes pleasure in other people's pain. It's pretty ironic she became a nurse.

Sir_Vivial

"He managed to convince the doctor..."

My mom says it was when my brother was 3.

It was the mid 80s and he used to beat the s*** out of us whenever we stepped "outta line" so my mom took him to a therapist to have him evaluated. He managed to convince the doctor that my mother was hitting us. She was spanking, but my brother made it sound like she used him as a punching bag, and Child Protective Services had to investigate. Nothing came of it,but my parents yanked him from therapy; my parents have been too afraid to discipline him ever since, and he basically emotionally scarred the hell out of us other 3 siblings.

Now he's a 34 year old ex-Navy hoarder that "remodels reclaimed properties" and lives on his own. He has girlfriends, but eventually he breaks them down so hard they either get smart and run, or they snap and either become alcoholics or try to kill him. The "love of his life" did both.

DenikaMae

"The good news is..."

I can't speak for my mom, but I first realized my brother is a s***** person when he kicked her out of her house (he was living with her) on Christmas Eve one year because he was throwing a party he'd been planning "for a long time" (he was 27, if that matters). Mom and my (then-9-year-old) half-brother had plans, but had to cancel because they got sick and wanted to spend a quiet evening at home. Older bro generously booked them a hotel room for the night, which was where she called me from in tears.

He'd always been a self-centered, sensitive ass but that was when it finally dawned on me that he wasn't a good person. The good news is that he's cut me out of his life over a facebook post I made (I complained that I had to buy my own car when our parents bought him three so far because he keeps wrecking them). He sent me an angry text that he doesn't want to speak to me for the rest of my life (he specified my life because I'm a terminal cancer patient) and ignored all my attempts to apologize. I cried for hours, but the next day I realized I'm way better off without him.

Wyntersun

"The first time I saw..."

My girlfriend's 5 year old. The first time I saw an extremely friendly dog run from her I raised an eyebrow. Then I got to see her try to control the world and just be a general a-hole. It blows my mind how animals see right through people...

SuperCPR

"And then there's the other one."

My aunt has two of the nicest children I've ever met. They're smart, kind, and funny, and love everyone to bits.

And then there's the other one.

My aunt knew her children were ass***** from before they were born. She didn't want a kid... So instead she had 3 with a guy she knew was cheating on her. But she had three and it was done, and now she's a single mom who absolutely hates her kids. She does anything to avoid spending time with them.

As I said, the youngest two are as great as they can be in such a predicament. She despises them the most. I've never seen her speak with either beyond simple commands.

The oldest is a piece of s***. He's the worst person I have ever met. And she ADORES him. He hits his younger sister in the face? Well obviously she was annoying him. He punches every man he meets in the junk? Oh, he's just playing!! He refuses to call any of us by our familiar titles (he won't say "grandma and grandpa", he calls my grandma either by her first name or "toots".... A far cry better than childhood, when he'd call her "sugartits" cause he heard it on TV)

He's abusive, obnoxious, and overall horrible. My aunt has yet to recognize this. We all knew it from the day he was born.

TheKate_est

"My aunt realized this..."

My aunt realized this when he punched me in the mouth at 4. He was in his 20s for the record at the time this happened. But my aunt's denial was so strong that she ignored all of the signs of it. Now he's paralyzed from the neck down and she is taking care of him. He still verbally abuses her. I wish he died in that accident instead of being paralyzed.

CooooookieCrisps

"I feel a lot of it..."

As the younger brother of someone who is a near constant arsehole to our parents the truth is most decent parents won't admit that their kid turned out a bad person. They just see themselves as the blame, that they did something wrong or try to find explanations such as mental illness (to be fair he's been diagnosed but nothing finite, either way he's still a fully functioning adult, no learning disabilities). I remember him always being a little s***, he hated seeing my parents giving me praise. My parents always describe it misbehaving as a child, pulling fire alarms and destroying shop displays as well.

I feel a lot of it does come from my parents being too lenient on him or not encouraging empathy at least. That's the biggest tell if you ask me, if you can see that your child can't recognise the negative feelings they're producing in others by the age of 8 then you need to get them help. You shouldn't consider it just a phase by that point, children are a lot smarter than most adults give them credit, they have the emotional capacity to recognise emotional pain in others by 8 (baring learning difficulties which in itself requires them getting extra help) ultimately they're not doing so for other reasons and need to understand how it feels to be on the end of the abuse they generate.

slyfoxy12

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley

Remember

"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt

Imagination

"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."

RedditbOiiiiiiiiii

"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."

monobarreller

Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."

– GTFOakaFOD

"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip

Yikes!

"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User

"Oh."

– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"

Sensations

Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."

PeachesnPain

Recovery

"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."

good_golly99

Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."

rayrayrayray

Free

The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."

TooReDTooHigh

This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.

Shocked

Giphy

"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."

Admirable_Buyer6528

The SOB

"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”

1-cupcake-at-a-time

Colors

"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"

Hannah_LL7

"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"

huntokarrr

The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."

Fluffy-Hotel-5184

Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."

Hot-Refrigerator6583

Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.

Shopping

"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.