In a perfect world, we would all know exactly when we needed to nope the F out, and we'd all never need to use that knowledge because everyone would be rational and everywhere would be safe.
That is ten million percent NOT the world we live in. At all. Not even close.
Which is how we end up with Reddit threads like this one:
Be careful out there folks. People are out in these streets pooping, waving shot guns and maybe trying to kill you. So if your gut, your friends, or your friendly neighborhood police officer tell you to leave ... yeah ... maybe heed the message.
My old apartment had an outdoor swimming pool for residents. We were swimming in it one day with my 1 year old son and another family was also there swimming. They had three kids swimming while the mom and her sister were off to the side chatting on the patio. Their kids were probably 3, 5 and 7. I was swimming with my son when I saw my husband's eyes bug out of his head and said, "Let's go NOW!"
While I'm gathering our stuff, he whispers that he just saw the 3 year old poop diarrhea out of their swimsuit into the water. As we're packing up, we then notice the mom notice the kid has shit in her bathing suit. She has the kid take off her bottom bathing suit, put on some underwear and LET HER AND THE REST OF THE KIDS KEEP SWIMMING IN THE POOL!!!
I was so horrified but I also am not good with confrontations. We went back to our apt and called the apt manager who then had to go down to the pool and close up the pool for cleaning which takes 24 hours if it's liquid poop. We lost a little faith in humanity that day.
Back in like, 2007 me and my buddy were in high school and I had just gotten my drivers license. Get tickets to go see a show in Camden, we're from philly burbs. This is also my first time over in jersey without an adult. With my last $5 I buy a T-shirt from a guy outside the show (masters of metal tour, heaven and hell, Judas Priest, testament, and Motörhead. It was sick for high school me).
We go to drive over the bridge and they're like, there's a toll, pull off and go to the 7/11 around the corner, there's an atm. Ok sure. Do that and pull up to the 7/11 and it straight up looks like there's about to be a gang fight. Me and my scrawny friend are in a 1990 Ford Bronco btw. Put it in reverse as soon as we see what's going on.
We found a cop, explained the situation, he called us idiots and told us a way to sneak over the bridge. Fun night.
Had a knock on my door; opened it to find some salesmen trying to get people to sign up for ATT high speed internet. Half humored them since I wasn't thrilled about my internet, but during the conversation one let it slip that they knew where I worked. Tried to play it off as "well we provide service to such-and-such air force base, so we probably got your information from there," but that base has some 30k people and highly unlikely there is some comprehensive list.
He started asking questions about my employment, which was pretty sensitive at the time, and the conversation was getting uncomfortable.They hadn't provided IDs at this point, so I asked and they provided some faded, hardly legible copies and then asked to come inside.
Pretty promptly shut down the conversation and told them to leave. Talked to neighbors later and no one else had them visit. Not sure what they were after.
I was 14.
I was once selling newspapers door to door. Came up to this long apartment complex and before I could step off the sidewalk a guy hung out his top floor window, cocked a shotgun at me and screamed to get off his properly. I ran.
This was years ago. My older cousin (17 at the time) took my little brother (5) and sister (7) and me (9) out in a big city we live near and we were standing at this bus stop that was at a small square grass park, probably about 200 feet across. It was January and the park was surrounded by short bushes that still had Christmas lights on them. My brother and I began to wander, and my brother wandered a bit further than me, following a string of lights. A few minutes later I get this weird feeling and my head shoots up and about 30 feet away is my brother speaking with this old, dirty man. I saw the man reach his hand towards my brother and I heard him say "if you like Christmas lights, I have some really nice ones over here you'd love!" My brother grabbed his hand and they both started to walk away, but I caught up before they could turn the corner and snatched my brother back. The man immediately turned around and hurried away without a word, and I was too young and scared and confused to confront him.
I never told anyone about it until years later for some reason but I was so overwhelmed with the thought that I had just experienced one of those moments that could have completely altered my life in a matter of seconds. If I had looked up 5 seconds later, they would have turned the corner and disappeared into the city without a trace.
A Little Messy
I met a guy off tinder at night, we walked around the park near his house and he suggested we go back inside to play Mario Kart. He warned me that his place was a little messy and I said okay not a problem. I go inside and am absolutely SHOCKED.
He's a hoarder and lives with his parents. The entire apartment smelled like cat piss. Poor cat. I was panicking on the inside cause I have asthma and ! am a clean freak but I didn't want to make him feel bad. It was absolutely horrible and disgusting and so hard to breathe. I was getting some super creepy vibes from him too and I went to the bathroom and texted my friend to call me in 5 min for a level 10 emergency.
She called and was crying hysterically on the phone and I quickly got up and left.
I was a relatively new driver at the time. My little brother and I were driving through Kansas City on a road trip, and took a wrong turn. Got into a pretty seedy part of town and stopped to ask directions (this was way back before Google maps or GPS) from two police officers walking into a store.
They looked at me and then each other and said "Miss, you need to get back in your car. Now." Gave me good directions to get out, though.
A few years ago a man stabbed his brother, got in a car, drove to the city (where I was living) did some donuts in the middle of a busy intersection (right outside my window at the time) and then drove said car down a popular street with many shoppers on it and killed as many as he could. Donut marks were visible from my window for ages.
A couple months ago I was waiting at a different busy intersection in the city and a car started to do donuts in the middle of it. My immediate response was to just bolt and I ran into the nearest store. I didn't even think about it my brain just immediately assumed his next step was to use the car as a weapon. Eventually he drove off but my heart was beating very fast. Not that interesting but yeah
Nursing Home People
My elderly neighbor stopped by one day and asked to borrow my phone as his had broken. When I asked if he was ok, he stated that there were some people from the nursing home in his house that shouldn't have been there. We talked to the police, and he went home.
The police called me back with more information, so I went to my neighbor's house and started asking questions. He invited me in to talk to one of the people in question....but there wasn't anyone there.
Turns out, he was hard-core hallucinating. I noped out of there before calling the police back and asking for a wellness check. They took him away in an ambulance, and I never heard what happened after.
Was one of the scariest moments of my life, though!
I met Peter at work. He was funny and nice to me, even though I shouldn't have shrugged off the red flags. For instance, he's the first flat Earther I've met in real life. He's not dumb like I thought they all were, I thought he was just weird. I later realized it's because he has serious untreated mental issues. Probably schizophrenia.
Anyway, we got along pretty well and he told me he wouldn't come back to work on Monday, he was gonna quit. He asked me if I wanted to go smoke weed with him on Saturday in a big park downtown and I agreed. He told me before that he was pretty lonely, so I agreed partially because I felt bad for him.
A little backstory to understand how much I messed up by meeting him: he told me that he sometimes picture himself destroying someone's head with a baseball bat. I thought we all get those kind of images sometimes and I didn't think much of that. He also told me that when he saw a co-worker of ours bending over, he pictured himself assaulting her. Not You don't need to tell me I was dumb to shrug that off, I already know that. It did raise a red flag, but I chose to ignore it.
So it's Saturday evening and I'm hanging out with him at the park. He told me he was in love with me and he thought I knew it. I didn't. I wouldn't have agreed to meet him if I did. He told me I could kiss him if I wanted, I awkwardly responded that I don't wanna do that. He seemed disappointed, but he took it well.
Then, the flat-Earth thing came up. I asked him what anyone would gain about hiding the fact that it's flat. I don't remember what he responded, I just remember that he was speaking really fast and moving his arms very fast too, he was just saying non-sense like the father creators are hidden in a dome under the Earth. At that moment, it's like I left my body and I was seeing myself, a girl sitting on a bench talking to a clearly mentally ill person. Like, completely out of his mind. It's like an alarm went on in my head, it's hard to describe it. I guess it's survival instinct. All I could think about was "You need to get the hell out of there NOW".
I told him that I wasn't feeling well and that I wanted to go home. He said "Already? But we just got here! Stay a bit for me!" And I insisted that I needed to leave. He got angrier and angrier, then I got up and started walking out of the park and he was following me, still trying to convince me to not leave.
He knew the area pretty well and I didn't. I looked on my phone to get the direction to the nearest subway station, then he told me "You don't need that, I know the way. Follow me, we'll cut through by this alley." Something told me to look at my GPS anyway. It wasn't the right direction at all. I told him that no, it's the opposite way. What he responded confirmed my fear:
"Oh, you wanted the fastest way?"
Yeah, no sht I wanted the fastest, most logical way. Also you wanna "cut" through an alley, but at the same time you want to make a detour? I'm still convinced to this day that he was trying to lure me in this alley to assault me, maybe murder me afterwards.
I was walking at a faster pace and he kept following me. At some point, he started crying and he tried to guilt-trip me by saying he shouldn't try to make new friends anymore. I didn't care about his tears, I knew what he tried to do to me. A miracle happened at that moment, I walked pass a bus stop and there was one coming! I wasn't even sure where it was leading to, but I jumped on it anyway. While I was climbing the bus' stairs and paying my ticket, he was calling me a whore and so on, I thought he was gonna get on the bus with me but fortunately he didn't.
I got home safe and I'm so thankful for that. I'll never ignore the red flags again.
A Crying Woman
I was walking along with my friends at around 6-7 (it was totally dark cause December) and this crying woman approached my friend, begging for help. I don't know what is it with my friend A, maybe she looks friendly or naive, but all strangers/weirdos approach her.
Immediately, A agrees, and the rest of them too, but I'm suspicious. The woman goes "come with me come with me I need help there's someone after me" and I stop her and suggest we should go into some building, or call the police, but she immediately balks and insists we must come with her.
I had to physically drag my friends away from her who still wanted to go back. This is a common trafficker ruse, especially against young women/teenagers, to get them into dark and secluded spaces
When my brother and I were 14 and 12, we were at the park not too far from my house playing on the swings and whatnot, this kid (8-9 maybe?) comes over and joins us, which we were fine with
A couple minutes into playing he says to us "do you wanna come into my daddy's car" we say no, he asks again, we say no, the kid says that he's gonna "get his daddy and that his daddy is gonna take us home so we can play some more"
The kid runs off to get his dad, my brother looks at me and says "we're leaving, right now" and grabs my wrist and takes us home
After that, we had my older siblings come along with us to the park.
Get To The Train
I was young, and me and my brother were downtown. I noticed there was a big dude who'd been following us for the past 10 minutes (And I mean he was blending into the crowd, but seemed to not be going anywhere but where we were.) Said we needed to get into the train and leave, I was tired. We managed to get away, but I saw the guy standing on the platform.
A week later the man was on the news: Serial child rapist.
I was 19, 5 months pregnant. it was like 12 or 1 AM. I had a really bad craving for an apple so I left to go walk to the store which was a 6-7 minute walk. I asked my boyfriend to go with me but he refused.
I got to the store and it was pretty empty. I saw one guy in the produce section. He had a hat on and kind of pulled it down over his face a little bit when he saw me. He also was talking on the phone the whole time but started talking quieter when I got close. He had a cart and every once in a while he'd put something in it.
The entire time I was deciding what kind of apple to get, he kept looking at me every few seconds. Then I went to a different aisle to get something and he'd show up a few seconds later. I thought he just happened to need in the same aisle as me for the first few times that happened but then I started to think he was following me because everywhere I went, he happened to be in not long after I went there.
I started going down random aisles to see if he'd follow and sure enough, about thirty seconds after I came in the aisle, he'd come in from the other end. I went to the checkout and started scanning things. You know how right before you get to the checkout there's candy there? He stopped in front of that and was staring like he was trying to decide what to get but the whole time I could feel him staring at me.
When I paid for my things, I started heading for the doors and noticed that he had turned his cart around and was heading the same direction as me but still in the main aisle. When I walked out the door, I turned around one last time and I saw him ditch his cart full of stuff and start walking faster to the door. I started running when I got outside and saw him get into a car.
This store was connected to other stores and there were sort of pillar things connecting the walkway in front of the store to the roof. I saw his car come closer so I moved behind the pillars so he couldn't see me. I saw him go to the stop sign, wait a few minutes, and turn left. As soon as I couldn't see him anymore, I took off running as fast as I could, which was hard since I was pregnant. I didn't stop running the whole way back and never saw him again. he really freaked me out and I yelled at my boyfriend for not going with me when I got home.
You ever entered a Shrike's pantry? Small animals skewered onto thorns as far as the eye can see. A glare from those seemingly cute birds has a sinister undertone.
Hang In There
Me and a friend were walking around some stores near a beach at night. We were walking along and had a good time. Were were walking my friend leans in and whispers "There's a guy following us." I immediately want to look behind but stopped.
We crossed the street and he followed us we went back to some of the stores we were in before and he followed us we eventually went into an arcade and just went into the back and stayed for a while. We called someone to pick us up and were about to leave but were stopped.
This old lady came up to us and started speaking to me and my friend about some very personal things going on in our lives and told us to "hang in there" while giving us both each $20. Our pick up got there right after this and as soon as we saw it we bolted towards it.
I have no clue if those were just a coincidence or not but either way it creeped us out and we never went back there again.
When I used to work at panda express, we had a guy come in and just stand at the back of the line for a good 5 minutes, letting other people go ahead of him. One of the girls who works the front counter, as well as myself, noticed that he was intensely staring at me, and turning his eyes and head to follow me wherever I moved too. It took a minute to register who he was, and when my co-worker commented on how he was staring at me like he wanted to fight me, I made mention to her that i recognize him, and he's my then girlfriend's ex-husband. I had been told that he wasn't the most stable person, and that he had a serious temper. He was also a good 6 inches taller than me, and probably a good 30-40 pounds heavier.
I'm not a coward, but I am disabled (I have gout in my arm, nerve and tendon damage in my right hand, a knee with very little cartilage in it, as well as a partially amputated foot. not really in any position to be fighting anyone), and no one wants to get their ass kicked, so I nope'd out of there to the back of the restaurant, and played it off like I had something to do back there(co-worker played along a bit. The store isn't very big, so it's easy to hear people in the kitchen speaking to each other at normal volume). I sat back there until I was given the all clear.
That night when I saw my girlfriend, I told her what happened. She told me she had told him about me, and where I worked. She then revealed to me that she wasn't divorced, and was in fact still married to him, and told him that she and I were sleeping together.
In the end, despite unknowingly being used to end a marriage, I felt like sht, and eventually messaged the guy on Facebook to apologize for what occurred. He told me I should get tested, because he'd suspected her of cheating on him for a while with several other guys.
We were exploring an abandoned mental asylum that had been overgrown, suffered from squatters over time, and was tucked away where most people wouldn't know exists (this is in western Maryland). After stumbling across some creepy sht, we see a man in the doorway of a building off to the side, and we still somehow didn't say "we need to leave now" just yet.
We advanced to another building and as we are crossing through the doorway, we see a cop car at the corner. Their lights go on and we book it out of there. Someone fell while doing the typical horror film 'look back while running away on uneven terrain' thing and I ended up having to carry them while we ran away (no man - or in this case woman - left behind!) and they ended up on crutches.
Needless to say this was my last time UrbExing.
Let me be real for a second.
Every time I listen to Bjork's "Unravel," my heart breaks a bit.
Have you ever listened to it?
It's on Homogenic, her third studio album, and it's incredible, passionate, smartly produced and a great showcase for her stupendous voice.
That song? An emotional rollercoaster, for sure.
There's tons of great music out there, though, and even more sad and gorgeous songs to discover.
People shared their thoughts after Redditor humanbear07 asked the online community:
"What song genuinely breaks your heart everytime you hear it?"
"Ann Wilson has such an amazing voice..."
"There's a few, but the isolated vocal track for Heart's 'Alone' is especially heartbreaking to me. Ann Wilson has such an amazing voice and her emotion really made that band."
Doesn't grow old.
There have been quite a few excellent covers of this one over the years, too.
"The first words give me chills..."
"Most songs by the late Jeff Buckley are sad on their own, and even more devastating in context. But the one that hits me the hardest is his cover of 'I Know It's Over' by the Smiths."
"The subject of the song is up for interpretation no matter what, but Jeff Buckley's premature death adds an element to it that seems to be about his life, whether he planned to or not."
"The first words give me chills the most— they happen after the classic reverby Jeff Buckley intro, the kind Hallelujah fans will be familiar with. He takes his time with this one, like he does with that."
No love for "Lilac Wine"?
It's clearly the best track.
"Ever since my husband..."
"'Merry Christmas, Darling' by the Carpenters. Ever since my husband Tom died in 2012, my heart breaks every Christmas since. We loved Christmas."
Karen Carpenter's voice hits differently when you realize how tortured her life was.
Gone too young.
"My Dad told me..."
"In My Life by The Beatles. My Dad told me when I was a teenager that he wanted it played at his funeral. I still can't listen, and when that day comes and I HAVE TO listen to it to honor his wish, I'm going to be a blubbering mess."
Sounds like you have an excellent relationship with your dad.
"My grandmother died..."
"He Stopped Loving Her Today, by George Jones. My grandmother died almost 20 years before my grandfather, and we played it at his funeral. Just typing this chokes me up a bit."
Songs have even more meaning (sometimes painfully so) when linked to specific moments in our lives, particularly the moments when we've lost people we care about.
"I'm not a Christian..."
"'Bridge Over Troubled Water' by Simon & Garfunkel. Not a Christian, but when I hear it, I understand why people believe."
A beautiful song, and timeless, too.
"My sister's husband..."
"Always on my Mind by Willie Nelson. My sisters husband chose to have it played at her funeral. And yes he was a crappy husband and she died young in a car accident."
Sounds like art imitating life, no?
"He's an amazing songwriter..."
"Jason Isbell has so many it's honestly hard to choose one. Speed Trap Town, Decoration Day, Cover Me Up. He's an amazing songwriter."
I don't know him–it's time to look him up and see how I feel.
"I can already feel tears..."
"One More Light by Linkin Park. I can already feel tears coming to my eyes just by typing this."
Chester Bennington's death was such a shock.
His music lives on.
"My brothers passed away..."
"Simple Man - Lynyrd Skynyrd."
"My brothers passed away in a car accident shortly after coming home from Afghanistan. Reminds me of them every time I hear it."
Sorry for your loss.
Hopefully hearing the song brings you peace.
Hearing a beautiful song can be an immensely moving experience.
And hearing a sad song can, for many people, help them cope with the pain of heartbreak better than they would have otherwise.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
Unfortunately, a friendship could really end at any point in life.
Friends grow apart, but also, sometimes, it's just necessary to say goodbye to your relationship with a friend.
Maybe they aren't the right type of friend for you anymore, or maybe something has happened in their lives to make them self-destructive and toxic.
The reasons are many, and they are all sad.
Redditor monarchmondays asked:
"People who have unfriended their childhood friend/best friend, what happened?"
Here were some of those answers.
Bad Looking Out
"I was more-so the one who was unfriended. Was going to be the best man in his wedding. Saw his fiance out with another dude. Like on this dude."
"Told him, he told me I was wrong, Yada Yada. Things got heated. I told him I couldn't be his best man. Some years down the road, he caught her cheating."
"Called me up, asked if I wanted to grab a beer. I went. He apologized. I accepted, but we're still not friends."-TheMotorcycleMan
Friends Don't Control Friends
"He was a pathological liar, manipulative and told all of my most trusted secrets to everyone because he wanted to feel powerful and like he controlled me."
"Haven't spoken a word in 5 years and I have never looked back."-TheDandy9
Sometimes Life Is The Only Thing In The Way
"As soon as I left my hometown and my best friend growing up stayed, we both changed in opposite directions. He assimilated to the local lifestyle, quickly became friends with people he never got along with in school."
"I left, made new friends, found new things I liked. He started a family, I started a career."
"The final straw though was he RSVP'd to our wedding and then just didn't show. No text, no call, no anything. I think he was pissed that I didn't make him my best man after I was his best man, even though it was exactly because he wasn't reliable and made everything about himself that I couldn't do it."
"He caused sh*t at other people's weddings and I just didn't want to deal with what I knew would be inevitable. It did highlight though that growing up I was his best friend as a matter of convenience where I genuinely liked hanging out with him."-porscheblack
It's never fun or happy to lose a friend, but sometimes it's necessary for your healing process.
We've Reached The Point Of No Return
"I haven't unfriended her YET but I'm basically at the point where I'm sick of her drama, pettiness and 'main character syndrome.'"
"Anything that doesn't go her way is taken personally and if you disagree with her (or even have a preference that differs from hers) she will berate you into submission and 'agreement.'"
"And heaven forbid you have a life that doesn't consider her wants and desires. We're both 30, almost 31. I'm too old for that sh*t."-Deezus1229
When The Punches Come, I Go
"I met my ex-best mate in school, he had a little narcissistic personality, but I understood that and ignored his faults."
"In late Teens, we started drinking and partying as most do; this is when it became apparent that he had alcohol problems, forever being violent looking for fights, killing my good vibes, and getting me pulled into unwanted situations where I saved him or stopped him from beating on someone for no good reason."
"Throughout our life, he never attempted to fight me. He remained a pretty good friend to me until our first trip overseas to Asia; during our trip, he tried to coward punch me in the back of the head because I asked him to put out his cigarette that he had just lit."
"I asked him because we were seated in a restaurant surrounded by families, for some reason that angered him, I got up to leave and luckily heard him coming and avoided his punch, but he then tried to attack me further, which ended with us both on the ground and me on top of him while he shouted and went crazy."
"Eventually, police arrived and pointed a gun at both of us; luckily, they didn't shoot. Having foreign police aiming at me because my friend wouldn't calm down was one of the most scary moments in my life and that's saying something because I don't come from a easy upbringing."
"He was drunk, of course, and claims he doesn't remember, but there's no excuse to try and coward punch anyone, especially your best mate."
"I packed my bags that night and left our joint holiday plans in the dirt, traveling solo and having a blast. When I got back from my trip, I quit drinking myself and have remained sober for the last five years."
"Throughout that five years, I've had brief encounters with him, but our friendship was never the same. Unfortunately, my old friend never changed as he aged; he eventually went to jail."
"I work in hospitals and have seen him show up to the emergency triage, bashed with broken bones, and just a few months ago, he randomly knocked at my door where my wife answered, he was covered in blood."
"My wife went and woke me up; he had a stab wound and refused to go to the hospital; I drove him home and haven't seen or spoken to him since.. His brother updated me and said he was fine, whatever that means."-King-Callous
When He's A Predator
"I, a 5th grader at the time, knew this chick who was in the 7th grade dating a junior in hs. The dude thought she was 16 because she was lying about her age."
"They had been f**king and sexting and all that jazz...he didn't know she was a minor. I went and told him, and they broke up, and he was pissed... yada, yada yada..."
"They became friends again after a few years. When I was in the 8th grade, she called just so he could flirt with me 🤮. I was 13 then, and he was probably around 20. I blocked her real quick."-Cancerous0713
The End Of An Era
"Inseparable all through jr and HS. We graduated in 85 so no social media but I still feel ghosted. He stopped returning my calls, I always had to initiate and when we did get together he wasn't that interested."
"I gave it a few tries but I got the message and just stopped contacting him and he never reach out to me after that. I never new why and it took almost 10 years for me to get over it and stop thinking about it every day."
"I kind of wish he would have just told me he doesn't like me anymore. I have a current best friend I met in college and we've been friends for 30+ years so it's all good."-DreamArcher
There is never a right time to say goodbye to someone you once considered a trusted friend.
"My best friends young son was killed in a four wheeler accident. I was the first responding paramedic. I had to take him from my friends arms to work on him. Knowing he was dead the all along."
"We flex the child on Lifeflight then I drove my best friend and his wife to the hospital. I knew all along he was dead but they didn't. It wasn't his fault or mine that he died in any way but I could never look my best friend in the eye again."
"All I could see was his pain. So we drifted apart. I finally got to tell him and his wife before my friend died with heart trouble."-hotandhornyinbama
Secret Mental Health Leeches
"She started being nasty to my husband when we got engaged. It was so gross. She was snarky and rude to him every time he spoke and made him feel unwelcome in our own home."
"I kind of fell out of friend love with her after watching her behave like that. My mom thinks it was jealousy or something, idk. My husband is the most fun and caring person I've ever known, I expected her to be happy for me."
"In retrospect, I realized there were a lot of other red flag issues I had been ignorant of. It's been 3 years now and I am so much mentally healthier without the drama she was churning up."-ThunderHeavyRains
When Mom Damaged Her
"Had a friend I met pre-kindergarten but had a falling out in middle school. Families knew each other and we were like sisters. But sadly, her mom was a true definition of a Tiger mom. Her mom always pushed my friend to be in all of these extracurricular activities, music lessons, tutoring, etc. Her mom was always dissatisfied; nothing was good enough."
"She wasn't the most nurturing parent. But my parents were the opposite. Especially my mom, she just wanted me to be a good person and do my best. But naturally I was a very good student."
"So my friend's mom would always compare my friend to me saying I was better than her because I was naturally gifted and didn't NEED all of that help. My friend began to resent me."
"Throughout puberty, she would call me a slut because I was physically developing, tried to imply I was ugly just to see my reaction, threatened to punch me, things I understood where they were coming from but did not think were justified as I had not done anything directly to her."
"Final straw was when she posted on Facebook that she thought I was ugly so I just cut her off completely. I pitied her for her family life but her bitterness toward me was wrong. Because through my eyes, she was my best friend and all she wanted to do was hurt me. Don't regret cutting it off"-dookieconductor
The sad truth is that people are not always meant to be close, and that some people are too mentally unhealthy to have any kind of closeness in their lives.
Until they grow up, there is not much we can do but sadly step aside and take care of ourselves.
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Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Certain personalities show up at almost every party like clockwork.
There's always that person who get's too drunk, someone awkwardly standing in the corner nursing a drink, the person who's not having a good time no matter what and the person babysitting the crowd they came with.
When there's alcohol—or any other substances—and the pressure of a social situation, all sorts of quirks will come out. We wanted to know what people thought their country would act like if they were a person attending a party.
Redditor amotyvukufyd asked:
"All the countries of the world are at a party. What is your country doing?"
Here are some of the best and most hilarious answers.
The United Kingdom is just leaving.
"Not before slapping the knees and saying 'right.'"
"Northern Ireland looks nervously at her sister before putting her sunglasses on and following."
"As an American from the Midwest, we do a 'welp' knee slap. Then sit/stand for another 25 minutes before leaving."
"Then talk in the porch. Then talk in the doorway. Then talk in the driveway. Then talk out the car window."
"'Yuh, I guess.'"
"'See you around, I suppose.'"
"'Yuh you bet.'"
"Buzz of the window rolling up."
Argentina is in the backyard.
"Argentina is either playing football in the backyard with Brazil or aggressively telling whoever's at the grill how to cook a steak."
"Don't forget, they're also drinking fernet and coke, or even cheap wine and juice, out of a cut off bottle even though there were enough glasses for everyone."
"While listening to El Potro Rodrigo."
"For sure we're arguing with Texans over asado."
"Texas would also totally be there despite not being a country itself."
"Texas showing up to a party where only entire nations are invited is such a Texas thing to do."
Greece is making questionable choices.
"I'm Greek so I guess a lot of sex, wine and questionable financial decisions that will ruin us the morning after."
"At least you have your club of friends who will drive you home when you pass out. My country, Argentina, will spend the night borrowing money. When they finally kick him out, he'll have to walk home, broke and alone. And it will start to rain."
Poland fighting with Russia, Belarus, and Ukraine.
"Poland. In the corner with Russia, Belarus and Ukraine, drinking vodka and fighting each other. Poland fighting Belarus and Ukraine fighting Russia."
"With some EU guys walking by with fancy drinks, dropping some concerns."
"And then Russia says 'Oh, you want some too?' And the EU guys turn and walk away."
"Then hours later writes a strongly worded comment to Russia's Facebook page. After spending 8 hours arguing over the exact wording."
Germany brings the beer.
"I'm German and I'd say Germany would complain about the taste of the beer."
"Germany should be bringing the beer. Please don't leave it to America who will bring some watery Coors Light!"
"Wouldn't they discuss politics too?"
"We so would! I was thinking about what we would do what wasn't absolutely cliché (like bringing the beer). I feel we would not only discuss politics but also rant about it. And other stuff. I feel ranting is really something we like to do. But also Germany would be drinking way too much and be completely fine the next morning..."
India is awkwardly dancing.
"India/that uncle dancing inappropriately in the middle of the dance floor."
"Not gonna lie, they got da best moves though."
"I was gonna say India would be that aunty gossiping about and judging others' outfits/looks, but this one is better."
The USA is just destroying things for fun.
"USA. Chugging beers and trying to smash a foldable table by jumping on it."
"I think the US would be like a really obnoxious frat dude that's also kinda fun. Like waaaay over the top bragging... but also did bring the weed. Then word gets around that he has a gun on him and it makes everyone uncomfortable, but he says it's just cause Russia and China are packing too."
"I figure we'd also be the one who obnoxiously insists on 'defending' every girl in the party- whether the girl wants it or not. Lots of 'do you wanna go?' energy, then trying to clean up any mess we make but just doing the absolute worst job of it while staying way, waaay too long after the party is over."
"We'd also get mad at China for stealing our famous brownie recipe even though we asked them to make it for us."
We aren't sure we want to be invited to that party.
Sounds like there's gonna be a lot of drama.
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Irrespective of men's sexual identity or preference, there are men who hate sports, and there are men who love musical theater. Do participating in either activity make men straight or gay?
"Straight men of Reddit, what is the strangest thing you have been told not to do because 'that's gay?'"
The following behavior just screams, "gay," fellas. Watch out.
"Sing a Lily Allen song during karaoke."
"Advice I received in high school from other students:" "Don't cross your legs with one knee over the other. Put one ankle over the other knee." "When carrying books, palm them and carry them at your side. Don't rest one edge of the books near your waist." "Never button the top button of your shirt."
Look, But Don't Look
"This one time, at summer camp, this guy who'd just been swimming in the lake told me you could tell how cold the water was by how hard his nipples were. 'But don't stare too long,' he said, 'because that's gay.'"
"You were the one who told me to look in the first place!"
Sandwich For Sissies
"When I was a kid, my dad called me a sissy because I cut a sandwich diagonally."
"I played the clarinet. I got called Faginet a lot."
"But that's one women do," one might argue.
"Changing my daughter's diaper. Mentioned it in the office one day. Called gay."
A Lighter Shade
"Buying a white IPhone."
"Added my husband (then boyfriend) to my phone plan. Went to the store on my own to upgrade both our phones. We both just wanted the next gen Samsung. It was only available in purplish-pink in store."
"I shrugged and said it didn't matter, he's putting a case on it anyways. Guys working at the store kept trying to talk me out of it, actively pushing me to go to another store, making them lose commission, just so my partner wouldn't have a feminine phone. He used his pink phone for 3 years."
"I've been criticized for knowing how to sew and cook. Those are essential life skills!"
"My father was a Marine drill instructor in the 50's. Guess who did all the sewing in my house growing up?"
"Yeah, no one dared to call him gay for it."
Here are examples of guidelines for being a manly man, according to manly men.
"Not a straight man but... back in my bartending days I asked a man if he wanted to see a dessert menu. He said 'if I wanted dessert I'd order wings like a real man.'"
"Weird flex but okay."
When I'm In The Mood, I Masticate
"When I'm feeling extra manly, I just take a bite out of a cow and then chew on some raw wheat."
"Like a man."
No Appointments Necessary For Straight Men
"I left a pick-up basketball game because I had an appointment to get a haircut. Evidently, the only straight way to get a haircut is as a walk in."
Abiding By The Law Is So Gay
"Using turn signals. And not as some sort of euphemism, but literally using them while driving to turn or change lanes."
In grade school, some fellow classmates asked me to check for gum on my shoe because they saw me step in some.
When I lifted my leg to take a gander, the boys were howling hysterically as if my actions confirmed something.
Well, it sure did. Apparently, if I l looked at the bottom of my shoe from in front of me, I was "normal," but since I bent my leg back and looked at the bottom of my shoe from behind, that made me "so gay."
Although, I didn't come out 'til years later, maybe those goons were onto something. Thanks for the heads up, guys.
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