In a perfect world, we would all know exactly when we needed to nope the F out, and we'd all never need to use that knowledge because everyone would be rational and everywhere would be safe.
That is ten million percent NOT the world we live in. At all. Not even close.
Which is how we end up with Reddit threads like this one:
What was your biggest 'we need to leave... Now!' moment?
Be careful out there folks. People are out in these streets pooping, waving shot guns and maybe trying to kill you. So if your gut, your friends, or your friendly neighborhood police officer tell you to leave ... yeah ... maybe heed the message.
The Pool
GiphyMy old apartment had an outdoor swimming pool for residents. We were swimming in it one day with my 1 year old son and another family was also there swimming. They had three kids swimming while the mom and her sister were off to the side chatting on the patio. Their kids were probably 3, 5 and 7. I was swimming with my son when I saw my husband's eyes bug out of his head and said, "Let's go NOW!"
While I'm gathering our stuff, he whispers that he just saw the 3 year old poop diarrhea out of their swimsuit into the water. As we're packing up, we then notice the mom notice the kid has shit in her bathing suit. She has the kid take off her bottom bathing suit, put on some underwear and LET HER AND THE REST OF THE KIDS KEEP SWIMMING IN THE POOL!!!
I was so horrified but I also am not good with confrontations. We went back to our apt and called the apt manager who then had to go down to the pool and close up the pool for cleaning which takes 24 hours if it's liquid poop. We lost a little faith in humanity that day.
Camden
Back in like, 2007 me and my buddy were in high school and I had just gotten my drivers license. Get tickets to go see a show in Camden, we're from philly burbs. This is also my first time over in jersey without an adult. With my last $5 I buy a T-shirt from a guy outside the show (masters of metal tour, heaven and hell, Judas Priest, testament, and Motörhead. It was sick for high school me).
We go to drive over the bridge and they're like, there's a toll, pull off and go to the 7/11 around the corner, there's an atm. Ok sure. Do that and pull up to the 7/11 and it straight up looks like there's about to be a gang fight. Me and my scrawny friend are in a 1990 Ford Bronco btw. Put it in reverse as soon as we see what's going on.
We found a cop, explained the situation, he called us idiots and told us a way to sneak over the bridge. Fun night.
Salesmen
Had a knock on my door; opened it to find some salesmen trying to get people to sign up for ATT high speed internet. Half humored them since I wasn't thrilled about my internet, but during the conversation one let it slip that they knew where I worked. Tried to play it off as "well we provide service to such-and-such air force base, so we probably got your information from there," but that base has some 30k people and highly unlikely there is some comprehensive list.
He started asking questions about my employment, which was pretty sensitive at the time, and the conversation was getting uncomfortable.They hadn't provided IDs at this point, so I asked and they provided some faded, hardly legible copies and then asked to come inside.
Pretty promptly shut down the conversation and told them to leave. Talked to neighbors later and no one else had them visit. Not sure what they were after.
I Ran...
I was 14.
I was once selling newspapers door to door. Came up to this long apartment complex and before I could step off the sidewalk a guy hung out his top floor window, cocked a shotgun at me and screamed to get off his properly. I ran.
Merry Christmas
This was years ago. My older cousin (17 at the time) took my little brother (5) and sister (7) and me (9) out in a big city we live near and we were standing at this bus stop that was at a small square grass park, probably about 200 feet across. It was January and the park was surrounded by short bushes that still had Christmas lights on them. My brother and I began to wander, and my brother wandered a bit further than me, following a string of lights. A few minutes later I get this weird feeling and my head shoots up and about 30 feet away is my brother speaking with this old, dirty man. I saw the man reach his hand towards my brother and I heard him say "if you like Christmas lights, I have some really nice ones over here you'd love!" My brother grabbed his hand and they both started to walk away, but I caught up before they could turn the corner and snatched my brother back. The man immediately turned around and hurried away without a word, and I was too young and scared and confused to confront him.
I never told anyone about it until years later for some reason but I was so overwhelmed with the thought that I had just experienced one of those moments that could have completely altered my life in a matter of seconds. If I had looked up 5 seconds later, they would have turned the corner and disappeared into the city without a trace.
A Little Messy
I met a guy off tinder at night, we walked around the park near his house and he suggested we go back inside to play Mario Kart. He warned me that his place was a little messy and I said okay not a problem. I go inside and am absolutely SHOCKED.
He's a hoarder and lives with his parents. The entire apartment smelled like cat piss. Poor cat. I was panicking on the inside cause I have asthma and ! am a clean freak but I didn't want to make him feel bad. It was absolutely horrible and disgusting and so hard to breathe. I was getting some super creepy vibes from him too and I went to the bathroom and texted my friend to call me in 5 min for a level 10 emergency.
She called and was crying hysterically on the phone and I quickly got up and left.
Now.
I was a relatively new driver at the time. My little brother and I were driving through Kansas City on a road trip, and took a wrong turn. Got into a pretty seedy part of town and stopped to ask directions (this was way back before Google maps or GPS) from two police officers walking into a store.
They looked at me and then each other and said "Miss, you need to get back in your car. Now." Gave me good directions to get out, though.
Donuts
GiphyA few years ago a man stabbed his brother, got in a car, drove to the city (where I was living) did some donuts in the middle of a busy intersection (right outside my window at the time) and then drove said car down a popular street with many shoppers on it and killed as many as he could. Donut marks were visible from my window for ages.
A couple months ago I was waiting at a different busy intersection in the city and a car started to do donuts in the middle of it. My immediate response was to just bolt and I ran into the nearest store. I didn't even think about it my brain just immediately assumed his next step was to use the car as a weapon. Eventually he drove off but my heart was beating very fast. Not that interesting but yeah
Nursing Home People
My elderly neighbor stopped by one day and asked to borrow my phone as his had broken. When I asked if he was ok, he stated that there were some people from the nursing home in his house that shouldn't have been there. We talked to the police, and he went home.
The police called me back with more information, so I went to my neighbor's house and started asking questions. He invited me in to talk to one of the people in question....but there wasn't anyone there.
Turns out, he was hard-core hallucinating. I noped out of there before calling the police back and asking for a wellness check. They took him away in an ambulance, and I never heard what happened after.
Was one of the scariest moments of my life, though!
Peter
I met Peter at work. He was funny and nice to me, even though I shouldn't have shrugged off the red flags. For instance, he's the first flat Earther I've met in real life. He's not dumb like I thought they all were, I thought he was just weird. I later realized it's because he has serious untreated mental issues. Probably schizophrenia.
Anyway, we got along pretty well and he told me he wouldn't come back to work on Monday, he was gonna quit. He asked me if I wanted to go smoke weed with him on Saturday in a big park downtown and I agreed. He told me before that he was pretty lonely, so I agreed partially because I felt bad for him.
A little backstory to understand how much I messed up by meeting him: he told me that he sometimes picture himself destroying someone's head with a baseball bat. I thought we all get those kind of images sometimes and I didn't think much of that. He also told me that when he saw a co-worker of ours bending over, he pictured himself assaulting her. Not You don't need to tell me I was dumb to shrug that off, I already know that. It did raise a red flag, but I chose to ignore it.
So it's Saturday evening and I'm hanging out with him at the park. He told me he was in love with me and he thought I knew it. I didn't. I wouldn't have agreed to meet him if I did. He told me I could kiss him if I wanted, I awkwardly responded that I don't wanna do that. He seemed disappointed, but he took it well.
Then, the flat-Earth thing came up. I asked him what anyone would gain about hiding the fact that it's flat. I don't remember what he responded, I just remember that he was speaking really fast and moving his arms very fast too, he was just saying non-sense like the father creators are hidden in a dome under the Earth. At that moment, it's like I left my body and I was seeing myself, a girl sitting on a bench talking to a clearly mentally ill person. Like, completely out of his mind. It's like an alarm went on in my head, it's hard to describe it. I guess it's survival instinct. All I could think about was "You need to get the hell out of there NOW".
I told him that I wasn't feeling well and that I wanted to go home. He said "Already? But we just got here! Stay a bit for me!" And I insisted that I needed to leave. He got angrier and angrier, then I got up and started walking out of the park and he was following me, still trying to convince me to not leave.
He knew the area pretty well and I didn't. I looked on my phone to get the direction to the nearest subway station, then he told me "You don't need that, I know the way. Follow me, we'll cut through by this alley." Something told me to look at my GPS anyway. It wasn't the right direction at all. I told him that no, it's the opposite way. What he responded confirmed my fear:
"Oh, you wanted the fastest way?"
Yeah, no sht I wanted the fastest, most logical way. Also you wanna "cut" through an alley, but at the same time you want to make a detour? I'm still convinced to this day that he was trying to lure me in this alley to assault me, maybe murder me afterwards.
I was walking at a faster pace and he kept following me. At some point, he started crying and he tried to guilt-trip me by saying he shouldn't try to make new friends anymore. I didn't care about his tears, I knew what he tried to do to me. A miracle happened at that moment, I walked pass a bus stop and there was one coming! I wasn't even sure where it was leading to, but I jumped on it anyway. While I was climbing the bus' stairs and paying my ticket, he was calling me a whore and so on, I thought he was gonna get on the bus with me but fortunately he didn't.
I got home safe and I'm so thankful for that. I'll never ignore the red flags again.
A Crying Woman
I was walking along with my friends at around 6-7 (it was totally dark cause December) and this crying woman approached my friend, begging for help. I don't know what is it with my friend A, maybe she looks friendly or naive, but all strangers/weirdos approach her.
Immediately, A agrees, and the rest of them too, but I'm suspicious. The woman goes "come with me come with me I need help there's someone after me" and I stop her and suggest we should go into some building, or call the police, but she immediately balks and insists we must come with her.
I had to physically drag my friends away from her who still wanted to go back. This is a common trafficker ruse, especially against young women/teenagers, to get them into dark and secluded spaces
- bauliya
Daddy
When my brother and I were 14 and 12, we were at the park not too far from my house playing on the swings and whatnot, this kid (8-9 maybe?) comes over and joins us, which we were fine with
A couple minutes into playing he says to us "do you wanna come into my daddy's car" we say no, he asks again, we say no, the kid says that he's gonna "get his daddy and that his daddy is gonna take us home so we can play some more"
The kid runs off to get his dad, my brother looks at me and says "we're leaving, right now" and grabs my wrist and takes us home
After that, we had my older siblings come along with us to the park.
Get To The Train
I was young, and me and my brother were downtown. I noticed there was a big dude who'd been following us for the past 10 minutes (And I mean he was blending into the crowd, but seemed to not be going anywhere but where we were.) Said we needed to get into the train and leave, I was tired. We managed to get away, but I saw the guy standing on the platform.
A week later the man was on the news: Serial child rapist.
An Apple
GiphyI was 19, 5 months pregnant. it was like 12 or 1 AM. I had a really bad craving for an apple so I left to go walk to the store which was a 6-7 minute walk. I asked my boyfriend to go with me but he refused.
I got to the store and it was pretty empty. I saw one guy in the produce section. He had a hat on and kind of pulled it down over his face a little bit when he saw me. He also was talking on the phone the whole time but started talking quieter when I got close. He had a cart and every once in a while he'd put something in it.
The entire time I was deciding what kind of apple to get, he kept looking at me every few seconds. Then I went to a different aisle to get something and he'd show up a few seconds later. I thought he just happened to need in the same aisle as me for the first few times that happened but then I started to think he was following me because everywhere I went, he happened to be in not long after I went there.
I started going down random aisles to see if he'd follow and sure enough, about thirty seconds after I came in the aisle, he'd come in from the other end. I went to the checkout and started scanning things. You know how right before you get to the checkout there's candy there? He stopped in front of that and was staring like he was trying to decide what to get but the whole time I could feel him staring at me.
When I paid for my things, I started heading for the doors and noticed that he had turned his cart around and was heading the same direction as me but still in the main aisle. When I walked out the door, I turned around one last time and I saw him ditch his cart full of stuff and start walking faster to the door. I started running when I got outside and saw him get into a car.
This store was connected to other stores and there were sort of pillar things connecting the walkway in front of the store to the roof. I saw his car come closer so I moved behind the pillars so he couldn't see me. I saw him go to the stop sign, wait a few minutes, and turn left. As soon as I couldn't see him anymore, I took off running as fast as I could, which was hard since I was pregnant. I didn't stop running the whole way back and never saw him again. he really freaked me out and I yelled at my boyfriend for not going with me when I got home.
A Glare
You ever entered a Shrike's pantry? Small animals skewered onto thorns as far as the eye can see. A glare from those seemingly cute birds has a sinister undertone.
Hang In There
Me and a friend were walking around some stores near a beach at night. We were walking along and had a good time. Were were walking my friend leans in and whispers "There's a guy following us." I immediately want to look behind but stopped.
We crossed the street and he followed us we went back to some of the stores we were in before and he followed us we eventually went into an arcade and just went into the back and stayed for a while. We called someone to pick us up and were about to leave but were stopped.
This old lady came up to us and started speaking to me and my friend about some very personal things going on in our lives and told us to "hang in there" while giving us both each $20. Our pick up got there right after this and as soon as we saw it we bolted towards it.
I have no clue if those were just a coincidence or not but either way it creeped us out and we never went back there again.
- gunbuilt
Panda Express
When I used to work at panda express, we had a guy come in and just stand at the back of the line for a good 5 minutes, letting other people go ahead of him. One of the girls who works the front counter, as well as myself, noticed that he was intensely staring at me, and turning his eyes and head to follow me wherever I moved too. It took a minute to register who he was, and when my co-worker commented on how he was staring at me like he wanted to fight me, I made mention to her that i recognize him, and he's my then girlfriend's ex-husband. I had been told that he wasn't the most stable person, and that he had a serious temper. He was also a good 6 inches taller than me, and probably a good 30-40 pounds heavier.
I'm not a coward, but I am disabled (I have gout in my arm, nerve and tendon damage in my right hand, a knee with very little cartilage in it, as well as a partially amputated foot. not really in any position to be fighting anyone), and no one wants to get their ass kicked, so I nope'd out of there to the back of the restaurant, and played it off like I had something to do back there(co-worker played along a bit. The store isn't very big, so it's easy to hear people in the kitchen speaking to each other at normal volume). I sat back there until I was given the all clear.
That night when I saw my girlfriend, I told her what happened. She told me she had told him about me, and where I worked. She then revealed to me that she wasn't divorced, and was in fact still married to him, and told him that she and I were sleeping together.
In the end, despite unknowingly being used to end a marriage, I felt like sht, and eventually messaged the guy on Facebook to apologize for what occurred. He told me I should get tested, because he'd suspected her of cheating on him for a while with several other guys.
- SlaterVJ
UrbExing
We were exploring an abandoned mental asylum that had been overgrown, suffered from squatters over time, and was tucked away where most people wouldn't know exists (this is in western Maryland). After stumbling across some creepy sht, we see a man in the doorway of a building off to the side, and we still somehow didn't say "we need to leave now" just yet.
We advanced to another building and as we are crossing through the doorway, we see a cop car at the corner. Their lights go on and we book it out of there. Someone fell while doing the typical horror film 'look back while running away on uneven terrain' thing and I ended up having to carry them while we ran away (no man - or in this case woman - left behind!) and they ended up on crutches.
Needless to say this was my last time UrbExing.
- kgxv
The people who love you the most can break your heart because of their betrayal of trust.
Cheating is cowardly and inexcusable, but depending on the situation and the couple, it is possible for them to find a path to healing emotional wounds.
But there are some ways in which infidelity is totally unforgivable.
That's the kind of scenario Redditor WCh3L3 was curious to hear about when they asked:
"What’s the wildest cheating story you’ve witnessed or happened to you?"
It must be exhausting leading double lives.
Hospital News
"A friend of a friend found out that her husband was cheating when she got to the hospital to see her husband who had just moments before been brought in by ambulance after a serious car accident only to be denied entry to his room because 'his wife was already in the room with him.'"
"He had two simultaneous lives with two women, neither of which was aware of the other."
– JeBronlLames
The Ruse
"My ex-wife pretended to be admitted to a mental health ward for long term treatment while actually staying with her new man and cheating on me."
– Impossible-Visit-199
"This one is just next level."
– most-royal-chemist
"That’s some Batman villain level of intrigue and machination. His wife missed her calling and wasted her abilities on sleeping around."
– filifijonka
A Separate Life
"My friend's mom was in a relationship with a guy for years and they ended up getting engaged and due to marry."
"The guy was a senior director of a company for which he travelled every week abroad for business."
"Eventually, the guy had a heart attack and when my friends mom turned up at the hospital, his wife and 2 kids were there also."
"Turned out he was already married with children and living a double life the whole time. When he went 'abroad' for business, he was simply going back to his actual family."
– wallbagz
Here's The Story
"My dad did this. He worked nights and would juggle both families that way."
"He came clean after he got admitted to hospital for heart trouble and realised that if things went badly he’d end up in this exact situation."
"I was 16 when he came clean that I have an older brother and sister. They found out about me then too - as did his wife."
"ETA: I’d actually already figured it out before he told me though. Nobody else had."
"EATA: I saw a preview of a text on my dad’s phone from my sister. I didn’t know she was my sister obviously, but it said ‘hi dad, mum says…’"
"At first I was in denial and I thought his friend must have borrowed his phone or something. I started to watch him more closely."
"He had a ringtone (lol the 00’s) that would say the name of the caller. I noticed whenever a certain name rang he’d leave the room. Some tactical eavesdropping later and 15 year old me had it figured out that I had a brother and sister."
"I didn’t clock I had a stepmother though, or that I was family no2 and they were his primary family. But I still think I did pretty well!"
"My whole family on my mum’s side knew - mum respected that it was my dad’s secret to tell and she gave him time to tell it. (Although they did have a few arguments about it as I was growing up, I never knew what they were about at the time.)"
– notemily-
Life is never the same once the truth comes out.
Shameless
"A family friend's husband was having an affair for 20+ years and that woman knew the entire time about his family. He was at her ranch one time and was bucked off a horse and broke his back. The affair partner called his wife to tell her and acted like everything about this situation was normal and the wife had no reason to act all upset at the affair. Some people really just have no shame."
"Guy lived and made a complete recovery, left his mistress and they stayed together since they were working on their relationship. He died a few years ago and the wife finds out he never actually left his mistress just lied."
– SailoLee92
Unilateral Decision
"In a small town the husband kept telling people he had an open marriage; finally someone asked his wife about it, she was unaware of this new arrangement."
– Long_Strange_Trip_GD
Rehab Romance
"Was in rehab, two people were there for sex addiction one a minister the other a Jewish housewife. They left rehab together early. Woman divorced her husband who sent her to rehab for sex addiction and married the guy she met in rehab. They are still married 10 years later and seem very happy."
– Life-Evidence-6672
On The Case
"I knew a guy years ago that was a private investigator. Many times he was approached by a spouse who suspected their partner was cheating."
"He had a slam-dunk strategy. He would suggest his client sign up for a course, whether a hobby thing, or educational. The key was that the class would happen for a period of weeks, all on the same day of the week, and all at the same time of day."
"Then, while his client was in class, he would follow the spouse."
"Caught them every time."
– PJMurphy
If you have a hunch about an unfaithful significant other, it's there for a reason.
Going For A Run
"Had a coworker who cheated on her live-in boyfriend. She would tell him she was going for a run, put on her shorts without underwear and would f'k her side piece in the apartment parking lot. So then she would come back inside sweaty 30 mins later and needed to shower and it all made sense to her boyfriend, he never questioned it. She was an awful human."
– rashawah
It Made Scents
"A friend caught her husband cheating because he kept coming home smelling like ferrets."
"Hard to play off 'long day at work' and explain that."
"When she found out at a holiday party that one of the young female coworkers owned ferrets, it all made sense."
– benloe7
Special Delivery
"I used to go to a comic shop. And the comic shop owner knew all of the gossip in the area. Nice dude. Remembers all of his regulars and asks about you if he hasn’t seen you in awhile to check in on people. Lot of people in the area grew up with his shop. So he’s got stories."
"Anyways he told us about this story from some years back about this regular. Who disappeared for a few months. Comes back one day. And the shop owner asks him, 'hey, man. Haven’t seen you in awhile?' Kind of like where have you been. The regular was like oh I’ve been getting divorced. I had to move it was a whole thing."
"So naturally the shop owner asks. 'Why are you divorcing your wife?' The regular caught his wife cheating."
"He had picked up a 2nd part time job as pizza delivery man because he was trying to fund to take his wife on her dream vacation. All of the money he earned from that job was supposed to go into that vacation. He had been working this job for like 6 months. It was a whole secret. She didn’t know he was doing that for her. Because he was trying to surprise her."
"He was the pizza delivery man at the motel. She was cheating at him with. The dude she was cheating on him with answered the door with her right next to him."
"He apparently didn’t even go back to the pizza place. He quit on the spot. Went home. Packed his sh*t and left town."
– TheMysticalPlatypus
Those who are unfaithful in their relationships may think they're good enough for more than one person, but they're usually not.
And while you may not believe in it, there's something called karma, and watching it enact justice can be extremely gratifying.
If you were the one being cheated on, know that the person with whom you've fallen in love is not the kind of person you want to spend the rest of your life with and there will always be a better human who will respect you and love you.
And if you were the cheater, watch your back. Because whether you believe in it or not, karma's coming for ya.
Food trends are not so very different from fashion trends, constantly evolving and quickly becoming outdated or passé.
Can you think of the last time you were served ambrosia at a dinner party?
Or have you noticed how anything featuring kale is now met with an eye roll rather than excitement?
Of course, some food trends tend to last longer than others.
Even if many people wish that they would also become extinct... the sooner the better!
Redditor Prestigious-Humor872 was eager to hear all the food trends people wished would die out, and fast, leading them to ask:
"What modern food trend can you not wait to die?"
Less Isn't Always More...
"2 ingredient desserts (with 7 'optional' ingredients that appear once you read the actual recipe)."- strawberry-emma
You Pay For The Experience
"Food trucks that charge the same price as a premium restaurant but serve half the size on a floppy plate that I have to stand up to eat."- thorn_10
"Food trucks."
"Weren’t they supposed to serve cheaper food because of lower overhead?"
"No brick and mortar?"
"We have a lobster roll truck-pulled by a Range Rover- that shows up for lunch and charges $22 for one entree."
"Ridiculous."- tizzymyers·
GiphyChoice Of Words...
"Calling a slight alteration to a recipe a 'hack'."
"Adding parmesan cheese to your grilled cheese sandwich is not a 'hack'."
"It's a minor recipe change."- No_Pear_2326
Jumping The Gun A Bit...
"If I'm on a website I'm only there to look at your menu."
"I'm not interested in starting an order before I've looked at the menu."
"No, I don't want to give you my zip code."
"Just give me your menu and some food pictures."- DueRest
Staying Humble?
"Fancy restaurants that say they serve 'street tacos' and proceed to charge $18 for three."- Chipwich75
T-Bell Yes GIF by Taco BellGiphyThere's A Reason We're Told Not To Play With Our Food...
"The stupid food wasting trends on YouTube and TikTok etc."- fluffernuttersndwch
Presentation Is Key...
"For some reason putting food in wine glasses."- Ralphroberts603
"Restaurants serving food on cutting boards, shovels, paper, shells, or anything that is not an actual plate."- Funny_Disaster1002
meat grill GIF by Gifs LabGiphyRemember The Golden Arches And The Red Roofs?
"Making all fast food buildings look like cookie-cutter beige/grey boxes."
"They all used to have their own distinct personalities."- mattnotis
There's Economizing, And Then There's Jusy Poor Hygeine...
"The videos of people making food in sinks."
"Gross."- h20rabbit
Is It Even Still A Secret After 100 Thousand Views?
"Any TikTok/IG trend that makes life more difficult for fast-food workers with overly complex orders or ordering stuff not on the menu or trying to 'one up' each others orders etc."- HiThisIsMichael
bored fast food GIF by Zaxby'sGiphyMaybe It Gives Them Incentive?
"Tipping as an option BEFORE receiving good service."- mytimeis2044
Sweet Tooth? Or Cavity Express?
"Sweets on top of sweets."
"A milkshake with a donut, lollipop, and cupcake attached."- Marleygem
Technology Slowly Taking Our Jobs...
"I just went to a restaurant, not a fast food place, a sit-down restaurant where you have to scan the QR code for the menu, then a screen pops up where you have to place your own order."
"No one comes to the table to answer questions, nothing."
"You place your order, a person comes by and throws your drinks at you. "
"Then they swing by a while later and throw your food at you."
"That’s all you see of them."
"You pay your bill on your phone, and are still expected to tip."- Megmuffin102
Saint Urbain Website GIF by Front of HouseGiphyBe it in presentation, cooking style, or flavor profile, people will likely always try to make food "cool" in truly bizarre ways.
Sometimes ignoring that the only thing that should truly matter is whether or not it tastes good.
At least people have finally realized that kale doesn't need to be added to everything!
For now, at least...