Movies aren't what they used to be. It's rare today to find a film that has the same kind of magic that they did a few decades ago. Now, it's all about the franchises and predictable plots. Maybe I'm just a cynic, but I truly think there aren't a lot of directors and producers doing what made films great back then.
Fellow movie buffs on Reddit seem to feel similarly. VeggieBurger953 asked:
What is a thing that a lot of movies do that you absolutely hate?
It’s all about the big budget franchises these days. Not all of them are bad, but it’s rare to find a good ol’ stand alone film in modern cinema.
Too many cinematic universes.
“That EVERY movie nowadays is set up as the first part of a possible trilogy, making it non-commital and vague as a result."
“Not just a trilogy, a franchise."
A very familiar trope.
star wars no GIFGiphy“When a character doesn't immediately explain what happened, to stop the conflict.
Just let me explain, I swear that's not what happened. If you just let me finish, I'll tell you! Please, just listen to SHUT UP! JUST SAY IT!
I didn't kill your [insert familial person here] I tried to save them, but I was too late.”
No one fights like that.
“The choreographed fights where the villains always attack one at a time.”
“And choreographed fights where the cameraman is having a seizure.”
Probably the weirdest thing about most movies is how characters interact with each other. This is mostly due to bad writing and overused plots.
Why are these characters always the worst?
“In Rom coms, the two love interests are usually bad for each other. So, to make them seem less bad for each other, when they go through that period where they break up and try dating other people, the other people are the weirdest, most unlovable freaks anyone has ever laid eyes on. Men are instantly abusive, women behave like spoiled children.
It's the stupidest trope.”
We’re not falling for it.
50 shades GIFGiphy“Male lead and female lead with no chemistry end up together 'just because'."
“Also, there's always this 0.01 second of eye contact, that can weakly be described as mutual interest, and from that they go on to make wildly passionate and compatible sex with no awkwardness or anything.”
No one actually does this.
“When two people want to talk privately, instead of them going into the hallway, they make the other 20 people leave the room.”
“Or they move 5 ft away from the group and talk "privately". As if no one could hear them talking in normal volume just because they turned their backs to the group.”
Unfortunately, when movies are bad, it’s most likely due to the screenwriting. If your script isn’t good, it’s hard to make a good film.
Foreshadowing is an art.
“When something is foreshadowed and then revealed later in the movie, but instead of just letting you realize it yourself, one of the characters say it out loud. Like the audience is too dumb to make the connection.
Biggest pet peeve is the fact that EVERY comedy has to turn sad in a very cliche way halfway through the movie. It's the guy loses girl and has to win her back formula that's in every damn comedy.”
We need you, Mel Brooks.
nos vamos GIFGiphy“Yellow filter when they enter Mexico.”
“I need a self-aware movie that has folks driving into New Mexico, filter coming on, someone complaining that it's still the US and the filter going back off until they actually cross into Mexico now.”
“Mel Brooks doesn't make movies anymore.”
Seems legit.
“When the FBI shows up to "take over" the case and then the cops butt heads with them. This does not happen. Cops are more then happy to let someone else do their work for them."
“Also the FBI is almost always portrayed as a bunch of overly bureaucratic folks who suck at "fighting crime" and only know how to follow their standard procedure. The original Die Hard is probably the most on the nose with this, to the point a central part of the plot revolves around the villain actually counting on this behavior."
Zombies make every plot better.
“An entire arc of the film has drama that is just based on a big misunderstanding or petty argument between two characters that is inevitably going to get resolved.”
“I want a RomCom that is like this after 20 minutes or so, you would think it is over and they live happily ever after, but then zombies from outer space invade. The last part should obviously not be mentioned in the trailers.”
Now that a random Reddit user mentioned it, every film should be directed by Mel Brooks. Every single one. We need more weird self-awareness in movies.
But you know what? We watch movies to embrace the unrealistic, so we can escape from real life for a bit. Maybe movies aren't so bad after all
“'Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience'.” What's your best real life example of this?"
They Literally Won't be "Shut Down"
"When I tell people to just reboot your computer and it will fix all their problems and yet they won't because they said if you wait long enough it will shut down, when in reality it only goes to sleep."
"Then when I tell them they have to completely shut it down they look at me like I'm an idiot and say they did."
"I tell them it seems like it but it only went to sleep."
"They argue back."- niallaa
Some People Just Don't Get It...
"I used to argue a lot with my sister when we were kids."
"She would do this thing where she would say something, and then I would reference back to it literally a minute or two later to prove a point and she would say 'I never said that' or 'that’s not what I said'."
"Absolutely impossible to argue with someone who will just deny having said things that could hurt their argument."
"Also, trying to change the course of an argument if they feel like they are 'losing'."
"A coworker once called me an idiot for doing something 'incorrectly' when I was actually doing it the right way."
"When I politely explained to them that the way they suggested doing the task didn’t actually work, they started asking 'why are you getting so angry?? I was just trying to help' etc."
"So now we’re arguing about whether I’m angry or not instead of the right way to complete the task."- themightypianocat
Facts Are Facts...
"Arguing is pointless if you do not agree on a set of facts."- niallaa
Facts GIF by Judge JerryGiphyYou Can't Have It Both Ways...
"For a short while, I worked as a line cook at a Cracker Barrel, and there was a little saloon style door that led to the staff section (kitchen, bathroom, etc)."
"There was a staff only sign on the door, above the doors, and on the wall behind the doors at eye level."
"Usually if someone from the customer side comes in, they said, 'Coming in' before opening the door, so they didn't hit anyone, but of course customers didn't know that."
"So when this dude opened the door and hit a waitress carrying a ton of drinks, we were reasonably upset with him."
"He said, ;You should really put a sign up'."
"We showed him all the signs, and he goes, 'That seems a bit excessive'."- GreyFoxHound1
So Wrong.
"Had an employee sign an NDA about an upcoming art installation that had investors."
"He told everyone."
"He argued with me the NDA only meant he couldn’t disclose anything with the people in the company."- BosskHogg
He Knew What He Was Talking About
This was best said:
“'Never wrestle with pigs'."
"'You both get dirty and the pig likes it'.― George Bernard Shaw"- Zerowantuthri·
pigs GIFGiphySome Outdated Inventions Are Definitely Not Missed...
"I’m showing my age here but I used to work for an estate agency, and we had sales offices set up at the site of large new housing developments."
"Our primary method of communication was fax."
"One of the sales associates telephoned our office to say that the fax machine had run out of paper."
"No problem, I said, one of the guys is coming your way later for a house tour, I’ll give him a box of paper to give to you."
"We then had an almost 20 minute long argument when they kept insisting 'NO, YOU JUST SEND ME A BLANK FAX BECAUSE I NEED THE PAPER, IT WILL JUST COME OUT OF MY FAX MACHINE'.”
"It was like trying to nail jelly to a tree."
"Difficult, irritating, and it achieved nothing."- BettieKat
Very Few Hills Are Worth Dying On...
"I had a friend in university who was a world-class high school debater."
"Over meals, she liked to pick a ridiculous proposition and then talk circles around people until they had to concede to her point, no matter how absurd."
"When she tried it with me, I just stonewalled her."
"Met every point with a solid 'I don't think that's true'." or 'That doesn't make sense'."
"Eventually she gave up and never tried it with me again."
"It was the only time I've ever used the tactics of the stupid to win an argument."
"But, to be fair, if you're not arguing with me in good faith, I feel no obligation to respond in good faith."- kitskill
IS The Customer Always Right?...
"Working retail."
"Especially when I worked in the tech shop or a computer store."
" Trying to convince someone their $500 laptop is never going to be a gaming system no matter how many of the very few replaceable parts we throw at it can be exhausting."- MOS95B
happy episode 7 GIFGiphyEducation Only Matters If You Learned Something....
"Was arguing with this dude about something math-related."
"He didn’t know how to read a study that involved statistics. claimed he was in multiple AP math classes."
"Tried saying that I 'probably don’t even know basic integration'."
"Gave me a common integration problem."
"He wrote it but forgot the minus sign, making it unsolvable."
"I pointed it out and he edited the comment to make it correct."
"Told him that some people can see when you edit comments."
"He claimed that he just capitalized a letter. on and on and on."- SaturdayNightCity
Good Legal Counsel Might Be Worth The Splurge...
"I asked a representative from the Friend of the Court to explain something she said and she told me that I understood what she was saying."
"I replied that I wouldn't have asked her to explain if I had understood."
"She said if I was going to be difficult, she would hold me in contempt."
"My X chimed in that she didn't quite understand what she had said and was greeted with a smile and an explanation."
"From that point on I always disagreed with the Friend of the Court on EVERYTHING, so that I could be seen by the 'Actual Court' and a Judge."- PURPLEPEE
Season 4 Episode 21 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphySore Winners Are No More Attractive Than Sore Losers...
"Once worked with a guy who, by his own admission, got his rocks off by picking fights."
"He'd start an argument over the smallest thing."
"If you said it was white, he'd say it was black, just to try to start something."
"The one that always stood out for me was the weather app competition."
"One day he asked me what temperature it was, so I read it off my weather app."
"He got all offended, because his weather app said it was a couple degrees warmer."
"So he decides we're going to have a weather app competition."
"He was going to chart what our apps said the temperature was, and at the end of the week, whichever one was closest to that day's high would be the winner."
"And the loser would have to start using the winner's app."
"To which I said, "What is your f*cking problem?'"
"So, yeah."
"For the first few days, he'd make a big performance about marching into my office, recording the temperature off my app, jotting down some notes, and walking off."
"This started on a Monday."
"He gave up after Wednesday."
"Either because I was winning, or he was disappointed because, despite his best efforts, I just did not give a f*ck about weather apps."
"Or maybe the boss told him to stop because I filed a complaint that this was bordering on harassment."- originalchaosinabox
Im Always Right GIF by ZionGiphyIt should perhaps be said calling someone an idiot, or even thinking it, is not a particularly nice thing to do.
Even so, if you're tempted to do so when you're in the presence of a particular individual, probably best not to provoke them.
After all, if you're so determined to "win," does it really make you any better than them?
"What insults are common in your country but you think most of the world would not understand/ever use?"
An Insult, Or A Suggestion?
"South Korea has an insult that says 'The Han River is warm'."
"Doesn't mean much literally but it implies that it is a good day to jump off the bridge of the Han River because it is not too cold."- SnooTomatoes7746
Hard To Say Which Is Better... (Or Worse?)
"Most of the world uses "motherf*cker", which we do as well. But in India it's much more common to call someone sisterf*cker."- PhreedomPhighter
...A Lot Of People Do...
"You have a bird“- stan-twice
Is This Even An Insult?
"In Australia the biggest insult is 'Thanks Champ' or 'Cheers muscles'."- b7oke
Definitely A Word No One Wants To Hear...
"'Kanker' (cancer) is used as a swear word/Insult here."
"Example: "je kanker moeder" (your cancer mom/mother)."
"The Netherlands."- Co_caine_
Well, Not Everyone Wants To Be Stuck In There...
"Greeks use the word 'p*ssywipe' when sitting in a tavern over a meal with their kids around."
"Basically calling someone a tampon is common."- International-Cup143
Ladies Manufacturing GIF by SiemensGiphyDefinitely Lost In Translation
"Jy's 'n poes."- take_the_L_
"Schafseckel (Sheep ballsack, you)."
"Krummbohreds Arschloch (off centre drilled a**hole, you)."- HF_Martini6
If Not An Insult, It's A Darn Good Metaphor...
"Sh*t a hedgehog" most would probably understand but not use."- IntelligentGrocery79
GiphyFill In The Noun...
"'You're so pretty'."
"Said in a sweet, condescending voice means 'it's good that you're pretty because you just said something so stupid that it proves that you're dumber than a bag of hammers'."- TrailerParkPrepper
Ding Dong?
"Bellend."- YaMomsHouse22
There Are Worse Things To Be...
"In France they say 'your mother is a hamster and your father smells of elderberry' all the time to the English."- Cussec
Christmas Hamster GIF by MashableGiphyNot Out Of The Realm Of Possibility...
"your ma's yer da."- throwawaythro2020
Just Stay Out Of The Kitchen...
"F*ck your mum's onion."- Alexshere_Ro
Of course, having a strong insult that isn't so well known outside of your own country might work to your advantage.
For all they know, they could be thinking that you are paying them the most wonderful compliment.
Making everyone happy...