People Describe The Most Valuable Item They've Ever Found In The Garbage
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure - and sometimes that saying is pretty literal.
Lots of people build entire businesses picking up cool stuff on bulk-pickup trash day, and upcycling it into something even better that people are willing to pay for.
Sometimes, you might even end up with something pristine and usable right away.
Reddit user JampackedAlborn1976 asked:
What is the most valuable item that you have seen somebody throw away or have found in the garbage?
And for real ... some of these people scored BIG TIME. Like big time. Like really big.
Like Refrigerator Big
just ask leslie jones GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Our current refrigerator is a double-door one with exterior ice and water dispensers. We got it for free, with absolutely no problems whatsoever. It's just a few years old."
"How we got it? My dad (civil engineer) was doing some work on someone's apartment when they said they had bought a new modern French door refrigerator and that they were just going to discard their current refrigerator."
"My dad simply asked if he could have it.. and they said yes." - SauloJr
Immigrants In Action
Dog Brazil GIFGiphy"I immigrated to the US from Brazil when I was 12. And every Saturday, my mom, stepdad, sister and I would go out at night to upper middle class neighborhoods the day before trash pickup to rummage through the garbage they were putting out."
"We found perfectly good TVs, VCRs, microwaves, couches, lazy boys, tables, books and comics, etc."
"I couldn't believe these Americans were throwing out like that. We furnished our entire house with that stuff. The entire Brazilian immigrant community in my town did it. We were flabbergasted." - PhillipLlerenas
With A Note
Television Bunny GIFGiphy"My wife yelled at me that someone put a big TV outside with a note on it. Walked across the street and it was a brand new Samsung 37 inch HDTV."
"They were actually renovating the apartment building and got an upgraded TV. Even had the remote taped to it with batteries, I guess I have really nice neighbors here in NYC." - MadLintElf
Life Hack!
studying busy philipps GIF by Drunk HistoryGiphy"If you want high end stuff out of the garbage for free, follow these steps:"
"Pick a city with a large university in it. If it's a school well known for its law programs, or medical, or engineering, all the better."
"Search for luxury apartment complexes that market themselves towards students. Look for things like included shuttle service, pools, fitness centers, etc. The more expensive and swanky the better."
"Figure out when finals week is at the end of Spring semester."
"Dumpster dive at those luxury apartment complexes during that week and the following weekend."
"Very wealthy international students will arrive in the US, fully outfit an apartment with nice furniture, big TVs, audio systems, gaming consoles, you name it, and when the semester ends they just junk it all because they aren't going to fly it back to wherever, and it's too much effort to spend the time selling when they do not care about the money."
"It's a smaller scale phenomenon a little like all the luxury cars abandoned at the airport in Dubai." - whattothewhonow
Literal Gold Treasure
valley of the boom david kim stanley GIF by National Geographic ChannelGiphy"I found a gold coin at goodwill for 5 bucks. It was in a case with someone's name and company name."
"It was their gift from the company for retiring. I assume the family threw it out when he died not knowing it was solid gold. It was in a in a thick solid plastic case that had to be cracked opened."
"It literally said 1 oz fine gold on it. I figured 5 bucks was worth the risk it not being real."
"It was a South African KRUGERRAND 1 oz coin. Everyone was just too busy to read it lol."
"Bought it and took it too a pawn shop and sold it for a couple grand." - streetmitch
The Best Day Of My Life
Will Smith Wow GIF by 1LIVEGiphy"When I was a kid, I grew up right outside the Los Angeles area in the suburbs. My stepdad was a garbage truck driver for the city of Beverly Hills."
"I swear in the late 80s and early 90s we'd have so much basically brand new stuff (still in boxes) brought home on a regular basis."
"I'll never forget one day in particular. My stepdad came home and was like 'get ready, come to the car, I'll need your help.' So I go down there and in back seat of his car he had a few large black garbage bags."
"We haul them up to our apartment and he's like 'go ahead, open them.' Inside was what I could only describe as an 80s kids trove of treasures."
"One bag contained just about every Ghostbusters and GI joe toy you can imagine, they were played with but had every little accessory, there was a bunch the playsets and everything."
"In the other bag was pretty much every LEGO of the early 80s sets, still in their original boxes. I was a big LEGO nerd but was totally thrown off by the old school space ones because they looked nothing like the 90s space sets. I think they even said "NASA" the minifig's chests."
"That was like a random day in July, it felt like Christmas. I was 9 years old and it was basically like the best day of my life up to that point." - Zombgief
Who Throws Away Money?
spongebob squarepants money GIFGiphy"A jar full of quarters."
"Annual spring cleaning projects happen in a lot of towns where anyone can put almost anything on the curb and it's taken away for free. It's to stop open dumping or stuff being dumped in ditches."
"Sometimes people deal with estates from winter by just dumping all their grandfather's stuff on the curb for the cleanup to get the house empty immediately. Most often they don't even bother to look at what they are throwing away."
"In 2012 on north road in Akwesasne I found an estate pile that I shuttled back and forth with my bike trailer getting lots of older tools like a scythe, hammers, saws, screwdrivers and wrenches, a 22 rifle with 100 round of ammo, a bunch of ar15 magazines, cast iron cookware, oil lamps, a hand crank food mill with all kinds of accessories, a black raven axe head (worth $100 easily since they are a collectable), and a quart size mason jar full of change mostly quarters."
"That was spring and the sheriffs office did a gun buyback in the fall where I took the mags and got $20 each for them (30 round mags suddenly illegal under the safe act of fall 2012. The buyback was a local political move). I still got the 22 and picked off a lot of woodchuck with it in my gardens." - Bogtrotterso1980
Filing Fever
Files Workload GIFGiphy"I own a small company which is located directly in front of a state funded program facility. The state decided to have this office shred all of their files as they were going to switch to electronic data (exclusively)."
"We found two of these old rotary filing cabinets outside of their office. They're worth almost $3k each!"
"They just placed them there and we saw them and asked what they planned on doing with them. They said, 'Hmmm.....either donate them or trash them.' The state told them simply to get rid of them."
"We jumped at this and took the two into our already tiny office because there was no way in hell that we were going to let these gems go. (We do use paper files, unfortunately)."
"They wanted to give us two smaller ones but seriously, our office is very small. I made some phone calls and they were picked up immediately by other office workers/friends." - GlitzBlitz
Foreigners Explain Which Parts Of American Culture Seem Strange | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
America, land of the free... and oversized portions and cars. That's how the saying goes, right? There are some baffling quirks about the United States. That...This Sucks - In A Good Way!
mrs doubtfire vacuum GIFGiphy"In the 1990s my moms work had a really nice high end Hoover that stopped working. They threw it out."
"My mom took it home because my dad tinkers and repairs things easily. Turns out since it was a bagged vacuum all the dummies had to do is REPLACE THE BAG."
"Like it never occurred to them to do the most easy and basic step. My parents were excited to have a really upgraded vacuum. Maybe like $500ish." - schweddyboobs
Tiffany's Trash
Audrey Hepburn Movie GIF by The Good FilmsGiphy"My dad found an old stained glass window laying out by someone's trash. He thought it would look cool hanging in our cabin, so he stopped and grabbed it."
"It sat in our garage for a few years before he looked at it more closely and found "Tiffany and Co." branding on it. He got in touch with some stained glass window dude who figured it was worth about $40k fully restored, so my dad sold it to him for somewhere around $30k." - throwaway_stopdrink
Sitting In It Right Now
Like A Boss Rap GIF by MorphinGiphy"About 9 years ago, at a previous job, they were renovating some office space, and were going to throw away a room full of broken down cubical panels, old chairs, etc."
"In the middle of all of it, like a diamond in the rough, was an $800 (at the time) Herman Miller Aeron chair. It was in perfect condition, clean, nothing wrong with it whatsoever, it was just getting replaced."
"I verified with multiple people on the project that it was bound for the dump, so that no one would think I was stealing. I'm sitting in it as I type this right now." - kickfacemouth
The Drug Kingpin
al pacino drugs GIFGiphy"I purchased a farm and it had about 20 broken down cars on it - some junk, some nice classics as well."
"I started dismantling them to restore them and in car hidden inside the door panels was weed and 50k in cash. The drugs had water damage and were obviously very old."
"I contacted police and they arrived real fast! After a nervous conversation they had a team there looking for finger prints or other evidence, I don't know."
"They came back and told me the story of the original owner, who was an old drug kingpin with ties to a lot of groups. They kept the money for a while then I got it handed back to me in new notes since those were flagged numbers on the money."
"It helped with the restoration projects and made some good money from selling them. I also got to keep the car which I restored and will keep for many years." - Kenworth117
Grandpa's Gold Turtle
Feeling Old Season 8 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy"24 karat solid gold turtle given to my grandpa by the wealthy owner of a chain of Chinese restaurants."
"It was palm sized and probably weighed the better part of a pound. My understanding is it's a traditional way to wish someone prosperity. Grandpa treated the restaurant owner as if she were his daughter and her son as one of his grandchildren."
"This meant the world to her as both of her parents passed when she was younger and the boy's father wasn't in the picture for whatever reason."
"Grandpa was a hoarder. Once a year a family member would take him on vacation for a week while the rest of the family rented a dumpster and cleaned out grandpa's house."
"Whoever found the turtle thought it was a cheap trinket or a child's art project and threw it away."
"It was like 3 months later, Grandpa calls my dad in a dead panic because he couldn't find the gold turtle. Once we figured out what happened grandpa didn't speak to any of his children for over a month."
"Grandpa has been gone for over a decade and we still don't know which sibling threw it out. I suspect the siblings will take that secret to their graves." - throwawayspank1017
Traveling On Wendy's Tab
"About 20 years ago Wendys had a promo with Airtrain Airlines... If you collect so many of these cut out squares from cups u can redeem for a free round trip flight. There was no limit."
"I spent several times jumping in the dumpster and must have gotten 15 free round trip flights for me.. my kids and family and friends...Granted a crappy airlines... but it allowed my Fla kids to see Colorado snow and ski for the first time." - godfather6545
Only The Super Rich
Money Fancy GIF by Adult SwimGiphy"I live in a mountain town in western US. I build and remodel houses for a living."
"Basically, only the super rich can buy and build houses around here. Just last week I started on a project where the new owner is tearing down the existing house and we're going to build a new in its place."
"They want to get rid of everything. All appliances, furniture, fixtures, etc."
"Got myself a new dryer (looked like it was maybe used a couple times). 5 star gas stove and hood vent, stand up deep freezer, new washer, a stackable washer/dryer, claw feet cast iron tubs (2 in perfect condition), dishwashers, microwaves, just to make a few. Freakin crazy." - smushedsloshie
Have you had any awesomely trashtastic treasures? Let us know!
The 'Brokest' Things People Have Ever Done
"Reddit user w3stward asked: 'What’s the brokest thing you’ve ever done?'"
When the money is gone... it's GONE!
And when that happens, we have to adjust.
People pivot in order to survive.
Some of us find coupons and discounts galore.
Some of us skip meals.
But when people are broke and still have to keep living, one has to get creative.
Redditor w3stward wanted to hear about the ways we've all stretched a few dollars, so they asked:
"What’s the brokest thing you’ve ever done?"
Payday
I Cant Hard Times GIF by La Guarimba Film FestivalGiphy"Called in sick on Wednesday because I didn't have enough gas money to drive to work but one more time, which I waited until Thursday to do, because that was payday."
TrailerParkPrepper
Pennies
"I was subletting a place and needed bus fare to get to work that day, so I searched every couch cushion and coat pocket in the hopes that I could find enough to get there. I ended up finding a ton of pennies, so I paid the bus fare in pennies. I was 30 cents short but the bus driver just gave me a transfer and waved me in. The first customer of the day tipped me like $5 on their coffee and I've never been so happy in my life."
GeoGirl07
Mitzvah Tanks
"In the early 2000s, the garment district in Manhattan had 'Mitzvah Tanks.' It was basically a mobile synagogue for the devout to come to handle religious observation during the workday with a Rabbi. Turns out they had bagels in there. I was just starting out my career (I was 21 or so) and money was tight. I would go in 3x a week and get bagels."
"If no one was looking I would stuff an extra into my suit pocket. I don’t at all look Jewish and almost no one from my part of the world is Jewish. The Rabbi approached me after a month and I told him 'I saw free food in a house of God and just figured since I am not a bad guy, God wouldn’t be too mad.'"
"Rabbi laughed and said something like 'From now on say hello. You don’t have to act like a thief trying not to get caught.' In a few months when money was less tight, I would stop by at lunch and chat with the Rabbi. It was a simpler time."
Itchy-Picture-4282
Scratch Away
"Brokest and stupidest thing I did. I bought scratch tickets in hopes to win money to buy Christmas presents when I was 18. I didn’t want anyone to think I had money problems at the time so I spent $10 on a scratcher and won $500. I don’t know how but it was enough for car insurance and presents."
FalseWeeknd
Yummies
Costco GIF by hero0fwarGiphy"Walked into a Costco with an expired membership card and had samples for dinner. I made the rounds a few times."
TheTyGoss
I do love a good, free trip around Costco.
Who doesn't love a good free sample buffet?
Eat Up
ramen noodles GIFGiphy"Bought a case of ramen noodles at the self-checkout at Walmart with 4 different debit cards that each had less than a dollar on them. You can make partial payments at Walmart self-checkout and nobody has to know how broke you are. Me and my 3 kids ate for the next 2 days."
-JunkyardDog
Grapefruit Pepper Chicken
"I had a small boneless, skinless chicken breast and a shriveled grapefruit in the fridge and only ground pepper in the pepper shaker, I had even run out of salt. That was all the food I had in the apartment. The grapefruit pepper chicken I made for dinner was disgusting but I ate half and saved half for dinner the next night."
"Driving home from work the next night I got 2 flats in my car tires and had to abandon my car on the side of the road. I had to leave it there until the weekend, I was lucky not to get towed or ticketed. I walked the two miles home, and then walked to and from work the rest of the week so embarrassed and afraid some coworker would see me coming or going without a car."
"I was able to borrow some money and added it to my paycheck to get my tires repaired. That was the poorest I have ever been in my life. I moved back in with my parents the next month."
DadsRGR8
Side of the Road
"Refused transport to the hospital, or any medical care at all, after I was hit by a car. I had been riding my bike home from work and going to the hospital would have meant leaving my only transportation on the side of the road. I didn’t carry a lock because I only rode my bike to work and had secure indoor storage for it at home and work."
Imaginary_Train_8056
Clean It Out
"I had $10 for food for 2 weeks so I got things to make a large pot of veggie soup (lentils, broth, canned veggies) and a large tub of plain oatmeal and ate vegan (not on purpose) for three weeks till it was gone. I've been told that rich people call this a 'cleanse' diet now."
Cantankerous_Won
See the Light
On My Way Goodbye GIF by Bubble PunkGiphy"My motorcycle headlight broke, so I started riding around with a flashlight in my mouth. True story. I was young and very, very dumb."
TedW
Anything for Food
"Sold my plasma for grocery money."
skidmarkzzz
"Ok, but that plasma kept my mom alive long enough to know she was going to have a granddaughter before she died from blood cancer. I’ll always be thankful for plasma givers ❤️."
bernelux
The things we have to do when our pockets are empty.
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
Princess Margaret might have grown up in the shadow of her older sister Queen Elizabeth II, but she didn’t stay that way. By the time she was a teenager, the young, beautiful, and fashionable princess was the talk of the town…and not for the right reasons. From her scandalous bedroom tastes to her tragic end, Margaret’s life was far from a fairy tale.
1. Her Birth Was Surprising
Princess Margaret was born on August 21st, 1930 in Glamis Castle in Scotland. But her beginning wasn't what many people think. See, little Margaret wasn’t actually directly in line for the crown. Her father was a younger son of the King of England, and no one in the family expected to make it to the throne. Well, that all changed—and quickly.
2. She Became Bona Fide Royal Through Scandal
File:King Edward VIII and Mrs Simpson on holiday in Yugoslavia ...commons.wikimedia.orgWhen Margaret was just five years old, her family had a transformation of fortunes. Her uncle became King Edward VIII, but then infamously abdicated in order to marry his love, Wallis Simpson. Suddenly, Margaret’s father was King George VI, and she was second in line to the throne after her older sister Elizabeth. Still, it might have been the worst thing to ever happen to her.
3. Her Mother Controlled Her
Margaret’s upbringing is probably surprising to a lot of people. Although she was a royal and had access to the best teachings money could buy, her mother decided that her daughters would only receive a bare-bones education, since she aimed to make them simply “nicely behaved young ladies". Later on, this had disastrous consequences for Margaret.
4. She Had A Weapon Of Choice
File:Young Queen Elizabeth 1952.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgAs a child, Margaret idolized her older sister Elizabeth, and, as we'll see, the two carried on a close relationship into their adulthood. Still, there was a hefty amount of sibling rivalry, too, and the girls often came to blows. According to their governess, while Elizabeth liked to throw punches, little Princess Margaret was much more of a biter.
5. Her Family Hid Her Away
While Margaret grew up in her gilded bubble, dark rumors started swirling. When she was a young girl, people saw so little of her that a persistent whisper claimed she was actually deaf and mute, and that her parents were hiding her from the public. Eventually, the family dispelled the rumors...but it didn’t take long for more to start, and these ones were all too true.
6. She Was A Spoiled Brat
File:King George VI LOC matpc.14736 (cleaned).jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgGrowing up as second in line to the throne would turn anyone into a spoiled brat, but this went double for Princess Margaret. Her father King George loved his respectable elder daughter Elizabeth, but he absolutely doted on Margaret, claiming that while Elizabeth was his “pride,” Margaret was his “joy". And soon enough, Margaret's spoiled upbringing started to show.
7. Her Father Indulged Her
People around the British court started to notice just how much the King let Margaret get her way, even allowing the 13-year-old girl to stay up past her bedtime and attend lavish royal dinners. Many aides began to worry about the Princess, especially as she grew into a beautiful, vivacious, and very willful young woman...
8. She Was The Center Of Attention
File:Margaret prinses van Engel (Bestanddeelnr 092-1353).jpg ...commons.wikimedia.orgBy the time she was barely a teenager, Margaret could already walk into a room and light it up. One courtier commented that she was “full of character and very tart". Another noted her burgeoning good looks and how she was "very sure of herself and full of humor,” though also said she “might get into trouble before she’s finished". Well, that trouble started early.
9. Her Governess Tried To Ban Her
Surprise, surprise, Margaret's charm had a dark side. Her own governess, Marion Crawford, thought Margaret was an attention hog, especially when it came to taking the attention away from her more “important” sister Elizabeth. To try to curb the habit, Crawford actually once wrote to a friend, “Could you this year only ask Princess Elizabeth to your party?,” not wanting Margaret to come in and steal the thunder.
10. She Overshadowed Her Sister
File:Princesses Elizabeth and Margaret starring in wartime Aladdin ...commons.wikimedia.orgEven Princess Elizabeth admitted that Margaret could take the wind of her sails—it’s just that she didn’t mind it. Elizabeth, reserved and taciturn, actually liked that Margaret was so forceful, colorful, and irresistible. As she once said, “Oh, it's so much easier when Margaret's there—everybody laughs at what Margaret says". Too bad the sisters’ relationship didn’t stay so harmonious.
11. Her Mother Was A Spitfire
As WWII broke out, there was pressure for the royal family to relocate to Canada for their safety. Of course, this didn’t happen. Instead, they braved the danger with everyone else in England. In response to pressure, Margaret’s mother famously retorted, "The children won't go without me. I won't leave without the King. And the King will never leave". Wonder where Margaret got her stubbornness from.
12. She Resented Her Upbringing
File:GoreVidalVanVechten1.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgEven at this point, Margaret was chomping at the bit for some challenges in her life. After all, she'd spent WWII inside and away from harm, and by then she felt completely resentful of her mother’s limited education for her. As her acquaintance Gore Vidal later recalled, "She was far too intelligent for her station in life". Is it any wonder she rebelled?
13. She Had A Famous Feature
As Margaret entered her 20s, she was one of the most stunning women in the royal family. She famously had a slender 18-inch waist and “vivid blue eyes,” and her good looks and pedigree got her into the most exclusive circles and clubs in London. Before long, the press dubbed her and her fashionable group of aristocratic friends “The Margaret Set". Then again, they weren’t always just “friends”…
14. She Was A Party Girl
File:Princess Margaret in Cyprus, 1977.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgWhile out on the town, Princess Margaret gained a reputation as “the world’s most eligible bachelor-girl” for the sheer number of men swooping in and out of her limo on late nights. Her little black book was a veritable who’s who of Britain’s gentry, from millionaire heir Billy Wallace to future Canadian Prime Minister John Turner. Yet as it turned out, Margaret only had eyes for one man.
15. She Nursed A Huge Crush
One constant presence in Margaret’s life was her royal aide, Group Captain Peter Townsend, a dashing war hero more than 15 years her senior. Townsend worked for Margaret’s parents and was their great favorite; many even said that King George treated Townsend like a long-lost son. Well, familiarity must breed romance, because Margaret was head over heels before she knew it.
16. Her Love Was Taboo
File:Princess Margaret and Sir Raynor Arthur.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgMargaret and Peter’s love story is now infamous, but few people know their scandalous beginnings. The palace first employed Peter when Margaret was just 13 years old, yet the teenager had her eye on the new arrival from the very start—even though he was already taken. When Margaret met him on his first day, she turned to Elizabeth and said, “Bad luck, he’s married". This only got worse.
17. She Flirted With Danger
Apparently, the vivacious Margaret wasn’t going let a little thing like holy matrimony—or their ridiculous age difference—get in the way of having her fun with Townsend. She flirted with him shamelessly, even once demanding he carry her up the stairs after a party, all in full view of her father King George VI. But harmless fun quickly turned into dangerous liaisons.
18. She Had An Exotic Romance
File:Peter Townsend (1914-1995).jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgIn 1947, Margaret’s family finally let her come with them on a state visit abroad—her first ever—to South Africa. But they made a fatal error. Ironically, Peter Townsend was her “chaperone” for the visit, and they often went riding together. Margaret later admitted that she fell in love with Townsend on this trip. But as for Townsend? Well…
19. She Had An Unrequited Love
For all that Princess Margaret was determined to seduce Peter Townsend, he wasn’t exactly sold on the idea at the beginning. In fact, many sources report that he, like most of the palace courtiers, saw Margaret merely as an “indulged child". Accordingly, Townsend treated her very distantly and firmly, and they had a bit of a love/hate start…at first.
20. She Seduced A Man
File:Øvrevold. Peter Townsend - L0060 922Fo30141701170265.jpg ...commons.wikimedia.orgAccording to Townsend himself, there was one exact moment where he realized that he was deep in love with Margaret, too. He claimed it happened in 1951, while the entire family was out for a picnic together. Under King George’s watchful eye, Margaret woke Townsend up from a nap, and he suddenly couldn’t deny his feelings.
Even so, Townsend was still very much married, and it would take an absolute tragedy to bring them together.
21. She Suffered An Enormous Tragedy
In the early 1950s, King George’s health started failing, thanks in part to his rampant smoking habit. Margaret’s father went under the knife for lung cancer, but surgery didn’t make things any better. On February 6, 1952, the monarch passed, making Margaret’s sister Queen Elizabeth II—and throwing the princess into a total tailspin.
22. She Fell Into A Crisis
File:King George VI and Princess Elizabeth.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgPrincess Margaret was incredibly close with her father, and his passing crushed her. She called him, “such a wonderful person, the very heart and center of our happy family". With that center gone, Margaret suffered from bouts of ill health and had trouble sleeping, even seeking out a sedative prescription to help numb her pain. And there was more upheaval to come.
23. She Got Her Deepest Wish
1952 was already shaping up to be a stressful year for Princess Margaret, but then Peter Townsend had to throw her another curveball. The palace aide went and divorced his wife, suddenly making him a free agent and fair game at last. I’d say Margaret made the rational decision and took it slow…but when has this girl made rational decisions?
24. She Had A Secret Rendezvous Spot
File:INF3-75 pt1 HRH Princess Margaret.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgThrown together by their grief and the respective total messes of their personal lives, Townsend and Princess Margaret soon began seeing each other in secret. Margaret had private apartments in the already secluded Clarence House, and the pair made good use of their alone time, visiting regularly on the down-low. Then, the inevitable crisis hit.
25. She Got An Indecent Proposal
As it turns out, people who are trauma-bonded go fast and hard in love, and Townsend proposed marriage to Margaret in April 1953, just over a year after her father’s passing. Margaret, who had been a love-sick girl for Peter right from the get-go, gave him an ecstatic yes in response. Except there was just one more enormous problem…
26. Her First True Romance Was A Disaster
File:Øvrevold. Peter Townsend - L0060 922Fo30141701170161.jpg ...commons.wikimedia.orgAs a divorced man, Townsend’s betrothal to Margaret presented a catastrophe for the monarchy. After all, the government and the Church of England had just denied Margaret’s uncle Edward VIII his marriage to Wallis Simpson for much the same reasons. Plus, since she was only 23 years old, Margaret also had to ask her sister for permission to marry anyone at all. It, uh, did not go well.
27. Her Sister Forced Her To Keep A Secret
When Princess Margaret informed her elder sister and sovereign of her steamy romance, Queen Elizabeth II definitely didn’t welcome it with open arms. Afraid of the stir it would cause at the beginning of her reign, Elizabeth insisted that Margaret wait for a year and keep the relationship a secret until after her coronation. Guys, this ALSO didn’t go well.
28. She Accidentally Revealed Everything
File:Princess Margaret 1965b (cropped).jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgMargaret and Townsend tried their best to keep their love under wraps, although some foreign papers did get wind of a romance brewing. But on coronation day, chaos really broke loose. In a casual, thoughtless moment during the ceremony, Margaret fondly picked some lint off of Townsend’s coat—and the press went wild.
29. She Became A Lurid Tabloid Story
Suddenly, seemingly every newspaper in the United Kingdom started weighing in on Margaret’s princess-and-pauper relationship with the civilian Townsend. They did not mince words, either: Most publications were appalled at the idea, with The People even running the headline “They Must Deny It NOW". Still, that was just the beginning of the nightmare.
30. The Government Turned On Her
File:British Houses of Parliament.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgWithin months, England had gone into full constitutional crisis mode. The parliament and the Church of England predictably criticized the match, insisting that Margaret denounce her royal privileges and allowance if she wanted to go through with the marriage. Yet within the inner circle of Buckingham Palace, things were even more tense.
31. Her Own Family Rejected Her Suitor
Margaret’s royal brood was totally torn over her girlhood romance. Elizabeth’s husband Prince Phillip detested the idea of Townsend becoming part of the family, and he let everyone know it. Meanwhile, Elizabeth herself just wanted her sister to be happy, yet felt bound to tradition and couldn’t say yes to the union. Instead, they came up with a desperate plan.
32. She Came Up With An Escape Plot
File:Queen Elizabeth in Aden 1954.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgTo buy Margaret more time, Elizabeth begged her sister to wait another couple of years, until she turned 25. At this time, she would no longer need to ask the monarch for permission to marry. If her infatuation with Townsend lasted, she could wed him then, all while Elizabeth avoided a crisis. It was supposed to be the perfect solution...in reality, it was a complete disaster.
33. She Had Multiple Flings
For one, Margaret and Townsend had to separate during this time, and many courtiers hoped that absence would make their hearts grow weaker. For a hot minute, it looked like they were right: While Townsend studiously avoided spending time with women, Margaret gallivanted around town with a series of men on her opera-gloved arm. But the lovers were hiding yet another secret.
34. She Had A Side Piece
File:Clarence house.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgDuring the entire time that they were supposed to be apart, Townsend was still secretly meeting with Princess Margaret. He would travel in from the continent for nights and weekends at their old love nest at Clarence House, or else stay with friends if he wanted to look super incognito. And then the long-awaited day came…
35. Her Birthday Was The Talk Of The Town
On August 21st, 1955, Princess Margaret turned 25—and everyone in Britain noticed. Hundreds of reporters swarmed Balmoral Castle, thirsting for any drop of news, and newspapers set up “ring watches” for Margaret’s hands. As one publication put it, "Nothing much else than Princess Margaret's affairs is being talked of in this country". But they’d have to wait for the next development.
36. She Had A Public Courtship
File:Prinses Margaret , Lord Snowdon en Prins Bernhard in de ...commons.wikimedia.orgMonths later on October 12th, 1955, Peter Townsend returned back to England, this time as Margaret’s official suitor. For the next weeks, the princess and the Group Captain courted each other at various dinners around town, all while the entire nation held their breath to see what Margaret would do. In the end, it was nothing but a tragic disappointment.
37. She Made A Shocking Announcement
After weeks of speculation, no betrothal had yet materialized—and that's when Margaret dropped an absolute bombshell. On October 31st, she released an official statement declaring “I have decided not to marry Group Captain Peter Townsend". After such a whirlwind romance, the populace was flabbergasted and at a loss for her reasons…but we now have an idea what they were.
38. Her Sister Gave Her A Heart-Warming Gift
File:Queen Elizabeth II - 1953-Dress.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgOne of the biggest urban legends around Margaret’s split from Townsend is that Queen Elizabeth II is to blame for their breakup. Nothing could be further from the truth. Official documents reveal she was working tirelessly to change certain policies to make it easier for her sister to marry. Instead, the main culprit was something much more heartbreaking.
39. There Was One Thing She Wouldn’t Give Up
Although some aspects of the scandal remain a mystery, one of them is very clear: Margaret didn’t think she could live as a civilian. One way or another, marrying Townsend would mean giving up her royal allowance, and they simply couldn’t live on the money he took in. That didn’t mean it didn’t hurt like heck—and Margaret’s next actions didn’t help matters.
40. She Rebounded Hard
File:Princess Margaret.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgMany people believed that Margaret would never marry after losing Townsend—after all, she had waited so long that most of her eligible male acquaintances were now married. That’s not what happened. Soon after disentangling herself, Margaret took up with her old friend Billy Wallace, even accepting his proposal of marriage. Sadly, it too ended it heartbreak.
41. She Got Her Heart Broken Again
Wallace wasn’t exactly the best rebound for poor Princess Margaret. First, he called her relationship with Townsend “girlish nonsense that got out of hand,” which definitely smacks of insecurity to me. Even worse, he cheated on the princess while on a trip to the Bahamas. Thankfully, Margaret broke things off when she found out, but it was out of the frying pan and into the fire…
42. She Fell In Love With A Rebel
File:Antony Armstrong-Jones 1965b.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgIn 1958, Margaret met bohemian photographer and man about town Antony Armstrong-Jones at a dinner party. On the surface, he represented everything she was looking for in a man: Dashing, daring, and bound to anger the establishment. They fell into a hot, heavy, and above all secret romance. Then, like everything Margaret did, it moved fast—too fast.
43. She Had A Quick Engagement
In October 1959, Armstrong-Jones got down on one knee and proposed to Princess Margaret with a stunner of a ruby engagement ring, surrounded by diamonds and shaped into a rosebud. For the third time in her life (that we know of anyway), Margaret said yes to her suitor. But there was a chilling reason behind her answer.
44. She Got Back At Her Ex
As it turned out, Margaret couldn’t quite forget about her first love Peter Townsend. She actually accepted Armstrong-Jones’s proposal the day after finding out that Townsend was planning to marry a beautiful Belgian woman named Marie-Luce Jamagne. It was a desperate revenge on Margaret’s part...and it gets even more twisted than that.
45. Her First Love Was Creepy
The thing is, Townsend probably wasn’t over Princess Margaret either. Eerily enough, Marie-Luce was the spitting image of the young royal, down to her long oval face, dark hair, and captivating eyes. Still, Margaret and Peter now seemed done forever (hint: they might not have been). It was enough to make any woman rush into a totally doomed wedding.
46. She Had A Fairy Tale Wedding
File:Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip host Queen's Dinner for ...commons.wikimedia.orgOn May 6th, 1960, Princess Margaret finally walked down the aisle, tying the knot with Armstrong-Jones in a lavish ceremony at Westminster Abbey. True to her fashion-plate reputation, Margaret wore a Norman Hartnell dress with the stunning, gigantic Poltimore tiara. Yet for all that the procession looked good, there was something missing…
47. The World Snubbed Her
If you looked closely at Margaret’s wedding ceremony, you might have noticed a disturbing absence: Almost no foreign royals attended. They refused to accept Margaret’s marriage to a common photographer, and only Queen Ingrid of Denmark was a noble guest Margaret wasn’t directly related to. If you're wondering, this was definitely a bad omen.
48. She Got A Bizarre Present
On the surface, the beginnings of Princess Margaret’s marriage were wedded bliss. Her possible ex-lover Colin Tennant even gave the new couple a plot of land on his private Caribbean island, Mustique, and it soon became one of Margaret's favorite getaway spots. For the record, I also accept tokens from my exes in the form of tropical land grants.
49. Her Life Looked Perfect
For a brief moment, the public good times kept on rolling for the couple. Although Armstrong-Jones fought privately against getting a title, the newlyweds soon became the respectable-sounding Countess and Earl of Snowdon. By 1964, they also had two children, David and Sarah, together. But behind the scenes, it was falling apart.
50. Her Husband Betrayed Her
File:Anthony Lord Snowdon.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgIn truth, the Snowdons had massive, reality TV levels of dysfunction. Antony, who was openly bi, had no qualms about going after nearly every bedroom prospect that came his way; as one friend put it, “If it moves, he'll have it". Before the ink was dry on Margaret's marriage certificate, Antony had had more than a few late night sleepovers.
51. Her Husband Abandoned Her
On top of all that, their marriage was a total mismatch of personalities and goals when it came to relationships. Armstrong-Jones was a workaholic, and Margaret often complained that he was never around and that she was constantly lonely. But don’t go thinking the princess was totally blameless…because she certainly wasn’t.
52. She Had A Huge Addiction
If Armstrong-Jones was a workaholic, Princess Margaret was hiding a much darker addiction. She'd always been a partier and had even dabbled in hard substances, but good old alcohol was her dangerous drug of choice. So when her husband was off working, Margaret was often hitting the bottle. Oh, and there was that other thing…
53. She Slept With Famous People
File:Mick Jagger (1982).jpg - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.orgAlthough Armstrong-Jones had a steady stream of male lovers and mistresses behind Margaret’s back, she didn’t have a leg to stand on. In the 1960s, she embarked on a string of extramarital affairs of her own, and there are rumors she even fell into the beds of celebrities like Mick Jagger and Warren Beatty. But, as it happens, Margaret’s very first indiscretion was one of her worst.
54. She Did Her Daughter Dirty
When the princess first dipped her toe into infidelity in 1966, she went big and went home with none other than her own daughter’s godfather, the vintner Anthony Barton. I mean, this doesn’t seem particularly smart on her part, but I guess there’s no accounting for taste. Even so, Margaret had a more notorious affair up her sleeve.
55. The Public Caught Her In A Lie
In 1967, Margaret engaged in a brief affair with Robin Douglas-Home, a nephew of a former British Prime Minister. However, she later denied everything and insisted their relationship was platonic. Until, that is, she was caught red-handed. Her love letters to him came out, spilling the beans—and her lies—to the world. And somehow, it got messier.
56. She Was A Black Widow
In the end, Princess Margaret had a good reason to deny the fling, given the tragic way it all turned out. Robin Douglas-Home never really recovered from their breakup, and Margaret’s denials probably did nothing to comfort him. Then, just 18 months after their romance fell apart, he fell into a deep depression and took his own life.
57. She Could Be Heartless
File:Prinses Margaret en Lord Snowdon Anglo Nederlandse ...commons.wikimedia.orgAround this time, Margaret's famous wit took on a very mean streak, reflecting her own bitter personal life. Once while she was at a fashionable party in New York, a fellow guest asked the princess how the Queen was doing. Margaret's reply was legendarily cruel. She sniped, “Which one? My sister, my mother, or my husband?” And her claws only sharpened as time went on.
58. She Had A Biting Wit
It now didn't take much for Princess Margaret's serene facade to crack, even in public. One time at an event, she sat next to the supermodel Twiggy. For two hours, the princess flat-out refused to speak to her companion, but eventually turned to her and asked who she was. “I’m Lesley Hornby, ma’am, but people call me Twiggy,” Twiggy said. Margaret's only response? "How unfortunate".
59. Her Husband Wrote Her Hate Mail
By the late 1960s, Princess Margaret’s marriage to Armstrong-Jones had turned into a tragedy. And one day, her husband went way too far. The Earl of Snowdon started putting little notes around the house and in books for Margaret to find, but they weren’t love letters—oh, no. Instead, they said horrific things like “You look like a Jewish manicurist and I hate you". Dear GOD.
60. Her Family Dealt Her A Cruel Blow
Despite Armstrong-Jones’s obvious mistreatment of the Princess, Margaret had very little in the way of a support system. Sadly, her stiff-upper-lip family often took her husband’s side in their squabbles, thinking that it was just Margaret being dramatic again. The tension and anxiety got so bad, even Margaret's psyche started changing...
61. She Had Terrible Nightmares
a black and white photo of a woman wearing a tiaraPhoto by Museums of History New South Wales on UnsplashAccording to Margaret herself, she often suffered horrific and recurring nightmares. The subject of these nightmares? Her own sister Queen Elizabeth II. In these dreams, the younger princess would imagine disappointing her sibling again and again. It’s no surprise, then, that Margaret's personal life eventually hit an infamous breaking point.
62. She Had A Boy Toy
Desperately lonely and almost entirely estranged from her husband, Princess Margaret started what she called a “loving friendship” with a man named Roddy Llewellyn, a landscape gardener 17 years younger than her. She even invited him for several visits to her private island of Mustique…and that’s maybe where it became less “friendship,” more “loving”…
63. She Tried To Kill Herself
Honestly, I don’t begrudge Princess Margaret getting her groove back—but her relationship with Roddy quickly turned dangerous. She grew so dependent on him that one day when he left on a spontaneous trip to Turkey, she became despondent and overdosed on sleeping pills to shut out the world. And the real scandal was yet to come.
64. There’s One Infamous Photo Of Her
In the winter of 1976, a notorious photograph hit the British tabloids. The snap showed Princess Margaret and her supposed boy-toy Roddy Llewellyn sunning themselves on the beach in Mustique, clad only in their swimsuits. Politicians immediately and cruelly denounced Margaret as a “floosie” and a “royal parasite,” but the photo’s real damage was to her marriage.
65. She Had A Scandalous Divorce
Guards British Images | Free Photos, PNG Stickers, Wallpapers ...www.rawpixel.comAfter the tabloids hung Margaret’s dirty laundry all over their front pages, the British public could see just what a downward turn her “fairy tale” marriage had taken. With the jig up, Margaret and Antony finally sought a separation (and thank goodness for that), officially divorcing in 1978. However, Margaret’s tragedies were far from over.
66. She Lost Her Beauty
The moment Margaret finally got rid of Armstrong-Jones, the bloom of her beauty seemed to die on the vine. She was in her late 40s, single again, and the weight of the world was back on her shoulders. After seeing her briefly at a party, photographer Cecil Beaton recalled that, her “eyes seem to have lost their vigor, her complexion is now a dirty negligée pink satin". Yet his reaction got harsher.
67. Karma Came For Her
Margaret's acerbic wit had won her many enemies, and Beaton was apparently one of them. He not only compared Margaret unfavorably to Queen Victoria on this occasion, he all but gloried in the loss of her youth. As Beaton continued, “She was not very nice in the days when she was so pretty and attractive...But, my God, has she been paid out!”
68. She Was A "Burlesque" Of Her Sister
By the end of her life, many thought that Princess Margaret became a parody of herself. The caliber of her lovers plummeted, and her crudeness only grew with her disturbing drinking habits. Even the most casual monarchists felt she disgraced her family name, and people started characterizing her as a “nightclub burlesque of her sister". Wow.
69. She Loved Dirty Party Tricks
Another one of Margaret’s more scandalous alleged lovers at this time includes the gangster John Bindon. Shockingly, Bindon claimed they embarked on an affair after he awed the princess with a lewd but admittedly impressive party trick—balancing five half-pint glasses upon a part of his body that, uh, I won’t name here. Look, use your imagination.
70. She Was A Snob
File:Prinses Margaret aan de lunchtafel in het Amstel Hotel ...commons.wikimedia.orgAlthough Margaret maintained a kind of young, care-free, and fashionable image to the public, many said that her real personality was much different—and much darker. She could be incredibly snobby when she wanted to be, and some even claimed she looked down on her own grandmother because she was a lower-rank princess.
71. She Had A Scandalous Daily Routine
Margaret's daily routine as an adult was just as spoiled as it was when she was a little princess, only with darker twists added in. When she was in her mid-20s, she often insisted on having her breakfast in bed. After that, she would get into freshly laundered clothes; she only wore an outfit once before washing it. Then, she'd wander downstairs for a mid-morning "vodka pick-me-up". Natch.
72. She May Have Been Involved In A Robbery
In 1971, the infamous “Baker Street Robbery” of Lloyds Bank occurred, where a gang tunnelled through the building and emptied hundreds of safety deposit boxes. But there may be more to the story. According to some conspiracies, the burglary was actually a cover-up to retrieve some “compromising” photos of Margaret. In some versions, MI5 hatched the whole plot to protect the Princess’s honor.
73. Her Friends Dropped Her
Perhaps the greatest sadness at the end of Princess Margaret's time was how all her fair-weather friends left her one by one. Still, she also pushed them away: The diarist Sir Roy Strong wrote that Margaret became “tiresome, spoilt, idle and irritating" during her later years and he complained that, “She has no direction, no overriding interest. All she likes is young men". Honestly though, same.
74. Her Body Started To Fail Her
Eventually, Margaret's lifestyle caught up with her. In addition to her other unsavory habits, the princess was also a near lifelong smoker, having started when she was just 15 years old at the latest. By the 1980s, she needed to have doctors remove her left lung, a procedure that eerily recalled her father’s demise. Sadly, her own end was near.
75. She Had A Steep Decline
File:Lockenfrisur1947.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgIn the 1990s, the Princess began to go downhill fast. She suffered a series of strokes, and also scalded her feet in a bathroom mishap, leaving her bedridden or wheelchair bound for months on end. By 2001, she was partially paralyzed and even had difficulty swallowing. Although the Windsors are famously long-lived, the once-vibrant Princess Margaret wasn’t going to make it long.
76. She Had A Direct Line To Her Sister
Despite shows like The Crown playing up the rifts between Queen Elizabeth and Princess Margaret, and despite the incredible hardships the two royals went through, they remained close. At one point, Margaret even installed a direct line from her home in Kensington Palace to Elizabeth's quarters in Buckingham Palace so they could always stay in touch.
77. She Was Much Different In Private
Princess Margaret could be bright, witty, and informal, but she also had her "average" moments too. As her governess once recalled, "Impulsive and bright remarks she made became headlines and, taken out of their context, began to produce in the public eye an oddly distorted personality that bore little resemblance to the Margaret we knew".
78. She Had A Cute Nickname
She might be “Princess Margaret” to us, but the royal family was very close-knit at the time, and all gave each other nicknames. While they called Elizabeth “Lilibet,” they most often called Margaret “Margot".
79. Her Name Might Have Been Different
Although her family nicknamed her "Margot," her birth name was almost completely different. Margaret's mother actually first wanted to name her "Ann," and she was "very anxious" to get her way. Except, well, she didn't. Her husband King George didn't share his wife's love of the name, and vetoed it completely. Thanks a lot, patriarchy.
80. She Met An Eerie End
File:St George's Chapel from the Altar, Windsor Castle, from ...commons.wikimedia.orgOn February 9, 2002, Princess Margaret passed in King Edward VII’s hospital at the age of 71, after her long and difficult battle with multiple illnesses. The day holds an eerie meaning. Following a decline that looked much like her father’s, Margaret also passed just three days after the 50th anniversary of King George VI’s own death.
81. She Stooped To New Lows
As Margaret's addictions to cheap drinks and sleazy men deepened, she developed some seriously tragic habits. According to one rumor, she got so used to smoking and drinking constantly that she simply glued matchboxes to her tumbler glasses to make for easier access to both vices. Is this dignified? Heck no. Is it genius? Yes.
82. She Just Couldn’t Quit Her First Love
Late into Princess Margaret’s life, people still wondered if she continued to carry a torch for her dashing Group Captain Peter Townsend after all these years. Few people know the real story. Even after their official announcement and split, the pair saw each other on and off, though they swore it was only in a friendly capacity. But there’s more…
83. Her Letters May Reveal The Truth
Although the Princess and her captain maintained they were only platonic in the decades after their romance, Margaret also made one final visit to Townsend in 1992, just a few years before his death, showing that they still kept tabs on one another. In reality, we may not know the full truth until much later. Their palace will release their love letters 100 years after Margaret’s birth, in 2030.
84. Her Husband Gave Her One Final Insult
Even in death, Princess Margaret couldn’t escape the horror show that was her marriage with Antony Armstrong-Jones. In 2004, a vicious report came out claiming that just three weeks into his marriage with Margaret, Armstrong-Jones fathered an illegitimate daughter with a mistress he had been seeing during his royal engagement. Oh, and it doesn’t end there.
85. Her Ex Told A Huge Lie
a close up of a double strand of gold glitterPhoto by ANIRUDH on UnsplashAt first, Armstrong-Jones vehemently denied paternity, despite the fact that the girl, Polly Fry, claimed she had done a DNA test and that he was most certainly the father. Yet four years later, he finally admitted that the story was true. Seriously, only Antony Armstrong-Jones could do Princess Margaret so wrong even after she died.
While not all relationships will last, that does not necessarily mean that every relationship that ends was a bad one.
Sometimes we walk away with some lovely memories of our ex-partners, and even mementos and gifts we'd rather keep than burn.
Redditor ChronicallyCautious2 asked:
"What is something an ex gave you that you still have?"
A Grand Piano
"A f**king 800-pound piano and I don't play and it's in the way."
"Does anyone want a free piano?"
- Zongohhhh
Love for a Teddy Bear
"She sewed a sweater for my childhood teddy bear, because the one he originally had was lost in the laundry."
"There is no way I would ever get rid of that."
- Helferlein_
A Comfy Bed
"A pillow case she quilted for me. That was 40 years ago and I still have it."
- GreedyNovel
Kids and Guitars
"A 1976 Black Ibanez Les Paul Custom Copy and a kid."
- BeatnikConspiracy
"Which do you love more?"
"Just kidding. I would never make you choose... but I notice you wrote the guitar first."
- persondude27
A Quality Coach Wallet
"I still have a great wallet from... 14 years ago... that my ex gave me. Probably the only thoughtful thing she ever did."
- LargeSnorlax
The Best Gift of All
"My ex wife was a big part of me getting off drugs and alcohol, so to me she gave me sobriety."
- Tawebuse
A Lovely Pick-Me-Up
"This birthday card... It was just very sweet and well written. We broke up on great terms but I read that card when I’m down."
- chenganvegan
"I just found an old birthday card from an ex in an old pile of papers last night. You can feel how true those words were meant at the time. Such weird sensation of melancholy appreciation."
- cripplinglivershot
Love on Paper
"Amazing love letters. She was a beautiful writer (and person!) I haven’t looked at them in a long time but I like that I have them as proof that I could be loved like that."
- aebersold
A Promise Necklace
"In 1972, a boy gave me a Saint Christopher necklace. I did not know it at the time but later found out that it meant we are going steady."
"We were a couple for a few months until he tried to kiss me, and I got scared and broke up with him. I tried giving him the necklace back but he insisted I keep it."
"I still have it, it's traveled all over with me, and it's kept me safe."
- Granny_knows_best
An Old Friend
"A stuffed animal. Only because I can't find it in me AT ALL to throw away a stuffed animal. It has feelings!"
- Odd-Faithlessness705
An Unplayable Guitar
"A beautiful guitar I never learned to play."
"I gave it to my son and he's keeping the tradition alive. By not learning either."
- never_mind_never
School Smarts
"Weirdly enough, academic confidence. She's the one that pushed me to go back to college after I dropped out, and now that I think about it, that might have been one of the last conversations we had."
"The short version of the story is of her telling me to stop f**king around and apply myself because she knew I was intelligent enough but I was lazy. I've graduated twice since then."
- awkwardlyexists
The Embodiment of a Red Flag
"The knowledge of what red flags look like."
- Sodomy_Steve
PTSD
"It kills me, to be honest. I didn’t know betrayals could hurt so much."
"I have other issues from my parents, but the betrayals, abuses, and infidelities from my ex-husband have destroyed so much in me. Because when we married, wasn’t that a promise he wouldn’t be that person? I couldn’t pick my parents. But I chose my husband."
- punkyfish10
A Beautiful Dress
"The dress she was wearing when I met her."
"We dated for three years, and when we broke up, I was heartbroken further to see that, in the bag of clothes she was gonna donate, was that dress. She looked radiant in it that day, and I wasn't entirely ready to let go."
"Unbeknownst to her, I took the dress from the bag and hid it away as a memento. We stopped talking for three years. There were instances in the early stages of grief where I would look at it and cry, but I wanted to remember her for the good times we shared together."
"Fast forward to a couple of years ago, and she reaches out to apologize. By then, I was obviously long over her. It was a clean and honest breakup, so I told her there was nothing to apologize for."
"We hung out at my place one day, and somewhere in a conversation about our past relationship, I pull out the dress to reveal to her that I kept it. The look of surprise on her face, man... and she almost began crying as she hugged me."
"Later that day, she told me that she told her cousin about how I kept the dress. This particular cousin didn't like me, so when my ex said she 'awwwed' at it and said that I was a sweet guy, that felt nice. She (my ex) and I hang out and send each other memes every now and then."
"I love this girl to death (platonically!), and would fight tooth and nail for her safety and well-being. She deserves to live a good life."
"Cheers to the folks who ended things on good terms. And an extra beer to those who couldn't."
- therealJoerangutang
When people think of ended relationships, they'll more than likely think of messy endings and broken hearts. But this group proved, more often than not, that good can come out, even at the end of a relationship.
Whether or not we want to admit it, we'd like to believe in love lasting forever and happily-ever-afters.
But some couples are not destined to last forever.
And perhaps not surprisingly, there are some tell-tale signs that a couple is doomed to fail.
Redditor ADTID asked:
"What screams 'we are not going to last long' for couples?"
An Accidental... Engagement?
"A recent personal experience I witnessed."
"The entire immediate family of one side of a wedding said it was a bad idea and less than a month into the marriage one of them stayed at their mom's house for the night because they were fighting."
"Also, they got engaged as a result of a failed breakup attempt..."
- UNCLETROUBLE24
"I had a friend that did this. He kept dumping her and the last time, she just told him she had enough."
"The next day, he came back, begging for her and swearing that he loved her more than anything in the world."
"And she told him to prove it."
"So he proposed. She didn't know what to do, so she said yes and it went downhill from there."
- minilibrarian
An Incompatible Future
"If they have strongly conflicted plans for their future. Either means they'll break up eventually or one or both of them will end up in an unhappy compromise."
- slinkocat
"Do not get married if one of you wants kids and the other doesn't. It is a whole mess."
"I have an aunt and uncle who I love dearly. He wanted kids badly and she did not. They almost divorced over it, but eventually worked through it. Traveled the world, had beautiful properties, the whole nine yards."
"Now she is in her 60s, and every time she drinks, she talks about how she should have had kids, and my uncle gets this look on his face that is difficult to describe, but it's not good."
- sanslumiere
On Again, Off Again
"Breaking up every few minutes and then back together again."
- Substantial_Pen_4445
"Especially in the first couple of months."
- SlapHappyDude
Obviously Controlling
"When the dynamic is super obvious to outsiders early on, that’s a bad sign."
"Whatever is happening on the outside is always worse on the inside."
"I know a couple where the woman will just berate her man publicly. She’ll talk to him like he’s an actual child. She tells him how much he’s allowed to do certain things, but twists it so it doesn’t look as bad. It’s as if she genuinely thinks he’s mentally disabled or something, except she only does it when she’s being controlling."
"For example, she hates when he plays video games. She thinks it’s immature and a waste of time that could be spent hanging out with her or being productive. She thinks it’s embarrassing that he plays video games."
"So he has to sneak around to play video games at other people's houses so that he can play it off as if it’s the other person's fault that he was playing. Like, 'Oh, Mike wanted to play, and I just couldn’t say no at his house.'"
"Now, I have seen this couple having a semi-private fight. They’re very loud and literally go one room away from their guests to have fights."
"This woman will berate the way he talks during fights and literally mock him to his face in a baby voice like, 'Nanana, I’m a grown man and I still play video games,' instead of actually making real commentary on the argument. This breaks his spirit and he ends up just exhausting during the fight and succumbing to whatever she wants. And the things she wants are super inconsistent, so he can’t win there, either."
"The public thinks she doesn’t like video games and looks down on him for it. But privately she’s completely broken this guy's spirit and he can’t escape the cycle due to constant emotional exhaustion."
"And that’s not even TRUE privacy. That’s when I’m in another room. God only knows how bad it is when they’re completely alone together. I hear some of it because this guy has come to my house when she kicks him out for the night, and he vents to me (while we play hours of video games of course, lol (laughing out loud))."
"This is shockingly common. I know, like, eight people who have at one point been in a relationship like this. Whatever abusive behavior is seen publicly is always ALWAYS worse behind closed doors."
"I’ve told him blatantly that he should leave her."
"He always says things along the lines of, 'You’re right,' but then ends up back with her within a few days."
"They’ve been together for so long, I think it’s a sunk-cost situation for him."
"I am doing everything I can by being a place he can crash for the night and voicing my opinions. We’ve tried to talk to the woman before, too, but that ends up just making the guy’s life harder."
"Anyone who’s reading this and thinks it sounds familiar, if one or two friends say your SO (significant other) sucks, maybe it’s a fluke. If ALL your friends say they suck, or they think you might be in an abusive relationship, consider how you can’t see it as clearly through your rose-tinted glasses."
- MomLuvsDreamAnalysis
The Fatal Attempts to Fix
"When one person wants to 'fix' the other. If your relationship is a repair project, you didn't fall in love with who they are. You fell in love with what you want them to be."
- jiff1912
Walking on Eggshells
"'Walking on eggshells’ around your partner in terms of what you can and can’t say. if you feel you can’t disagree with your partner and/or voice your opinion without it turning into an argument."
- shelby75R
"That can be 'not going to last' or 'lasts several years too long.'"
- VanFailin
An Audience for Their Arguments
"The way they speak to each other when they’re not alone."
"I noticed this after my divorce and I started dating again, because you speak to these new people with a lot of respect and kindness. Then we’d get around married couples and they’d say awful things to each other in nasty snappy tones, and it was jarring."
"Fast forward ten years and all those couples I noticed doing that are divorced now."
- SnoBunny1982
"When both make the atmosphere so uncomfortable when you are in their house."
- Big-Nerve-9574
Wedding Day Etiquette
"When he smashes her face in the cake at the wedding and she hates it."
- A_wild_Mel_appears
"I did the manly thing and asked my wife. She said no, she was spending hours doing makeup and didn’t want to ruin it. So instead I gave her a tiny forkful to eat and it was great."
- MoobyTheGoldenSock
Very Public Relationships
"My cousin emptied out her bank account, her ex-husband's bank account, and borrowed from their relatives to fund a $25k wedding."
"They broke up about a year later. They were together for over 10 years before this."
"They also posted pictures the morning after while in bed still... It was just another sign they’re insecure about their relationship, over posting about how great it is all the time."
- StainedBrain1997
"A childhood friend posts five or six photos of her and her husband every day. The lighting is always magazine perfect, there is good composition and depth of field. It must take an hour of every day."
"I just want to be like, 'Girl, are you okay?'"
- PreferredSelection
Lack of Communication
"Lack of communication."
"Discussing every disagreement means screaming over each other, exploding, shutting off communications, and/or running out of the room."
"So they won't be able to resolve anything in a constructive manner."
- Bebe_Bleau
Arguing Too Much, or Too Little
"If all disagreements end in arguments."
"My partner and I disagree about a lot of stuff. But we can talk, discuss, and even sometimes agree with the other person's side."
"It'd be weird if you saw eye to eye on 100% of stuff too."
- jayhitter
Open Marriage Solutions
"When they think opening their marriage will fix their problems."
- randomname196
"My wife and I had two different pairs of married friends who brought in 'a third' to spice up their marriage. We now have four separate friends who we can't hang out with together."
- DigitalZiggurat
Apathetic Reactions
"I was at a party one time, and there was a marriage counselor there that had been working for 20-something years in couples counseling."
"I asked her what the number one sign was that the couple wasn't going to make it."
"Without hesitating, she said, 'If one person shows contempt for the other's feelings, it's over!'"
- Marauder
"This is the answer, well, one of them. John Gottman calls contempt, defensiveness, being critical, and stonewalling the 'Four Horsemen of Relationships.'"
"In other words, they are the signs that things are deeply not okay between the two people involved."
"Looking at past relationships, contempt is the big one. Once that entered the picture from either side, it was all downhill from there."
- ifnotmewh0
Adding a Child to the Mix
"Having a kid to 'fix' their relationship."
- ThingsOfThatNaychah
"Being a kid with divorced parents is bad."
"But being a kid with parents that should be divorced but aren't is way worse."
- AvergeMortisEnjoyer
An Undeniable List
"In my experience:"
"1. Contempt / mockery."
"2. Lack of communication / respect / empathy for the other person."
"3. Glue babies."
"4. Having a wedding as opposed to making a marriage."
"With the exception of children, consistently and habitually prioritizing others over their SO (significant other)."
"Then there are the things that for me are default dealbreakers: any kind of abuse, cheating, financial dishonesty, violence, gaslighting. This criteria also applies to their treatment of my children where applicable."
- PugWitch
There are always going to be relationships that aren't going to work out, but there are some that are literally doomed to fail, and that latter group is pretty obviously on the path to ending to everyone outside of the relationship long before the actual couple is even aware of it.